We need a Billy edit of the Bogandoff copypasta.
Quick rundown on him:
>the court system bows to Mitchell
>in contact with pac-man
>rumoured to possess psychic abilities
>controls south florida with an iron fist
>owns restaurants and hot sauce stands across the world
>direct descendant of an ancient royal bloodline
>will bankroll the first cities on mars (every city will have a Rickey's restaurant)
>in the process of terraforming Pluto as his personal planet
>owns basically every DNA editing research facility on Earth
>the first designer babies will be Mini Mitchells
>said to have 400+ IQ
>ancient Indian scriptures tell of an angel who will descend to earth and best all other mortals in competitions of strategy, wit, and hand-eye coordination
>this is Billy Mitchell
>owns nanobot R&D labs around the world
>you likely have Billybots inside you right now
>every child has the Mark of Mitchell imprinted on them at birth
>Billy is a regular guest at Mar-A-Lago, delivering the word of God and divinely inspired political strategy to Donald Trump
>discovered the Ark of the Covenant
>learned how to get a perfect score in Dig Dug in under a week
>Walter Day allows him full access to the true scores hidden within the Twin Galaxy archives
>nation-states entrust their gold reserves with Billy. There is no gold in Ft. Knox, only Ft. Rickey's
>he is 59 years old, from the space-time reference point of a base human
>in reality, he is a timeless being existing in all points of time and space from the big bang to the end of the universe
>he has been able to access the Akashic record since birth, and has spoken about what he saw while he was a newborn
>Billy Mitchell will guide humanity into a new age of wisdom, peace, and love
