Wizardchan

[Watcher]

http://wizardchan.org/v9k/res/63287.html#63295

Cooking, getting groceries, and making money are so hard, I wish I could just be locked in my room and have a magical girlfriend like in anime.


Seriously, I should just post on the site and teach them a spell summons the world's smallest violins to play sad songs for them.

I'm really tempted to post on their board and link a "First World Problems" image.

They're living in almost a technological wonderland utopia compared to the rest of the world, where you expect to eat food with dirty hands and walk 5 miles to a pond filled with dirty water, only to bring it back and feel happy your drinking it.

So to simply exist you need to work. You need to work to achieve anything. Why is working so painful? And by work I don't mean physical work alone.

I just want to be lazy and do what I want. But unless you have very tolerant rich parents or a lot of money you inherited or won in a lottery such a lifestyle is not possible. Even on welfare the government will bug you and you will need to do work.

I feel like I was just not made to live.

FUCK YOU

Every, single, one of your ancestors thought this was deplorable, that you weren't just entitled to being fed, or being comfortable.

If you don't want to work you are lazy, simple as that. You are not entitled to anything besides the oxygen you breathe and the rights granted to you by law. And now you're demanding pussy as well and think women just magically don't want a lazy piece of shit that doesn't want to work.

I wish I could help achieve this but I have no motivation and endurance at all. I am just one step above a plant.

You're worse than the plant. A plant only just needs a little bit of water, which it usually just gets from rain. And it needs sunlight. You demand food, shelter and pussy, and go on a shitty website about how you're the oppressed one.

 

[Count groudon]

Hey, turns out these guys really are wizards! They're talking about the schools of magic!

#33856 here. What "schools" of magic would you all like to see? So far I have:

Illusion (largely social engineering)
Technomancy (general computer skills)
Arithmancy (Math)

…and something like "Mechanomancy" for Engineering and related practical skills. The issue is, these "schools" could be better organized. Technomancy, Arithmancy, and Mechanomancy are all very similar and Illusion is far too broad (could be construed as covering everything from appearance & dress to Law to artistic talents).

>>33889
There could be an argument for illusion being the art of disguising oneself as a normal. A very temporary class of magic, and vulnerable to normies who can make the required will save.

>Battle wizardry
For military apprentices and advance innawoodsmen

>Abjuration
The art of placing wards, such as video game posters or flame t-shirts on oneself or ones dwelling to ward away harpies.

And you all thought they were just a bunch of permavirgin shut ins!

 

[PvtRichardCranium]

Do not post about your personal sexual experiences or allude to the possibility that you have any.
Do not post about real life social activities or your romantic relationships.

EDIT: 11 guests

Yer a wizard Harry.

 

[Springblossom]

http://wizardchan.org/v9k/res/62776.html

If they put half the effort they spent sperging over dumb bullshit into doing something productive, Wizardchan wouldn't exist.

 

[Saney]

http://wizardchan.org/v9k/res/62776.html

If they put half the effort they spent sperging over dumb bullshit into doing something productive, Wizardchan wouldn't exist.

But effort is haaaaaaaarrrrrrrd. Why do productive things when they could just sit on their asses and pretend to have sex with their imaginary girlfriends?

 

[c-no]

http://wizardchan.org/v9k/res/62776.html

If they put half the effort they spent sperging over dumb bullshit into doing something productive, Wizardchan wouldn't exist.

But effort is haaaaaaaarrrrrrrd. Why do productive things when they could just sit on their asses and pretend to have sex with their imaginary girlfriends?

Because they would rather feel the love from their 2-D/bodypillow waifu's from anime/cartoons/MLP/whatever. They are like Chris since working is too hard it causes them to . Oddly enough, I'm pretty sure getting physical with their waifu's is even more hard work.

 

[TastyWoodenBadge]

I'm pretty sure getting physical with their waifu's is even more hard work.

I can imagine a wizard having a heart attack while pumping his love pillow.

 

[Watcher]

The paranoia intensifies
http://wizardchan.org/meta/res/9634.html

Look at me, I'm a TRUE WIZARD unlike you other plebs. I've never even seen a succubus in person, if you've come within 10 feet of a succubus, you don't belong on this site. This site is for the TRUE WIZARDS only.

Its funny how it starts out with them attacking this user but then they start devolving into debates about what a "true wizard" is and who is entitled to post on their board.

Wizards and Harry Potter
http://wizardchan.org/v9k/res/62981.html

That said, I really wish Harry Potter had not been written by a goddamn woman. She had a good idea of what went on in a prepubescent boy's mind, but absolutely no fucking idea what happens in a teenage boy's head.

referring to what house they would get sorted into

I was going to say Hufflepuff, but then I remembered they're supposed to be hard workers.

>read Harry Potter growing up
>identified most with Peter Prettigrew
>ratty little coward who hung around a group of actual friends who basically kept me around to make fun of

Peter Pettigrew was the only Wizard among normalfags

 

[CatParty]

I'm pretty sure getting physical with their waifu's is even more hard work.

I can imagine a wizard having a heart attack while pumping his love pillow.

i would like for this to happen

 

[Sexual Stallone]

Joking aside, I don't know whats so edgy and counter-culture about having pride on being a recluse, socially inept, welfare leech, neck-bearded fat-ass who thinks women are objects that should give out pity sex to losers that don't have any sort of goal in life, aside from living in their parents basement, discussing My Little Pony and wondering what it'll be to fuck their little sisters.

But hey, that's just me, maybe I'm too much of a normalfag to understand all the nuances that go into being a Wizard.

 

[CatParty]

it's misplaced jealousy that the cannot get their shit together, so they decide to make a community for complaining about it instead of you know, doing something about it. even though the idea of a community of people with the same interests and problems is kind of at its core against their rule of "no friends"

 

[Springblossom]

it's misplaced jealousy that the cannot get their shit together, so they decide to make a community for complaining about it instead of you know, doing something about it. even though the idea of a community of people with the same interests and problems is kind of at its core against their rule of "no friends"

It's why they have to stay anonymous and not swap contact info, so they won't have friends. It's a really toxic community; it's based around not having friends, meaningful relationships, or lives in general, and the rules and moderators are so strict so that nobody can make any friends through the site, unless they want to get banned.

 

[tobacky_vapor]

http://wizardchan.org/v9k/res/62776.html

If they put half the effort they spent sperging over dumb bullshit into doing something productive, Wizardchan wouldn't exist.

But effort is haaaaaaaarrrrrrrd. Why do productive things when they could just sit on their asses and pretend to have sex with their imaginary girlfriends?

Because they would rather feel the love from their 2-D/bodypillow waifu's from anime/cartoons/MLP/whatever. They are like Chris since working is too hard it causes them to . Oddly enough, I'm pretty sure getting physical with their waifu's is even more hard work.

I highly doubt they can last more than two minutes humping their pillow before releasing their taint.

 

[c-no]

I highly doubt they can last more than two minutes humping their pillow before releasing their taint.

Perhaps they have to whack themselves off to release their taint after humping their anime/pony/whatever waifu pillow.

 

[Shadow Fox]

it's misplaced jealousy that the cannot get their shit together, so they decide to make a community for complaining about it instead of you know, doing something about it. even though the idea of a community of people with the same interests and problems is kind of at its core against their rule of "no friends"

It's why they have to stay anonymous and not swap contact info, so they won't have friends. It's a really toxic community; it's based around not having friends, meaningful relationships, or lives in general, and the rules and moderators are so strict so that nobody can make any friends through the site, unless they want to get banned.

It's really interesting to me that they value their inclusion in this sad-sack club of do-nothings over the possibility of maybe having an actual friend. Is this all they think they're capable of? Do they feel that this is the best they could realistically hope for? Or do they realize that making a friend would take something away from the victim complex around which they've built their identities?

 

[Springblossom]

it's misplaced jealousy that the cannot get their shit together, so they decide to make a community for complaining about it instead of you know, doing something about it. even though the idea of a community of people with the same interests and problems is kind of at its core against their rule of "no friends"

It's why they have to stay anonymous and not swap contact info, so they won't have friends. It's a really toxic community; it's based around not having friends, meaningful relationships, or lives in general, and the rules and moderators are so strict so that nobody can make any friends through the site, unless they want to get banned.

It's really interesting to me that they value their inclusion in this sad-sack club of do-nothings over the possibility of maybe having an actual friend. Is this all they think they're capable of? Do they feel that this is the best they could realistically hope for? Or do they realize that making a friend would take something away from the victim complex around which they've built their identities?

I'd say a little bit of both. A lot of them seem to think the same way I did a few years ago, when I was suffering from severe depression. If you've never been depressed, then it's hard to understand what it's like. If the depressed ones got some help (not necessarily therapy; what snapped me out of depression was getting a shitty job and realizing I didn't want that to be my life), I feel like most of them would be able to turn themselves around.

Then you have the ones that are always trash-talking 'normie culture' and shit like that, who seem to be so bitter and hateful of normal society. They're more of the victim complex types, who pretty much deserve what they get.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Look at me, I'm a TRUE WIZARD unlike you other plebs. I've never even seen a succubus in person, if you've come within 10 feet of a succubus, you don't belong on this site. This site is for the TRUE WIZARDS only.

[/quote]
Honestly this is kind of a crazy feat. Going through your life without ever encountering a woman? Almost impressive in its insanity.

 

[Surtur]

Unless he was spontaneously generated, he spent 9 months inside of one.

 

[Null]

true wizards are test-tube babies.

 

[Overcast]

true wizards are test-tube babies.

So wizards are homunculi?

Where's Edward Elric when you need him?