# How To Get A Lot of Money



## Gorgar (Jul 12, 2021)

I dunno; you help me, dude.
No, seriously, I need a lot of money right now, but I want to make it myself.


----------



## Stephanie Bustcakes (Jul 12, 2021)

Go into restaurants and take the tips off the tables.


----------



## tehpope (Jul 12, 2021)

Marry an old rich dude and wait it out. Get him to write you into his will.


----------



## MrTroll (Jul 12, 2021)

Just ask your rich dad for some.


----------



## McAfee'sCorpse (Jul 12, 2021)

Be a twitch hot tub streamer?


----------



## Justanotherguy (Jul 12, 2021)

Sell drugs


----------



## Ramborambo (Jul 12, 2021)

Just buy more money.


----------



## Justanotherguy (Jul 12, 2021)

Ramborambo said:


> Just buy more money.











						The Trillion Set Circulated - 100, 50, 20 and 10 Trillion Zimbabwe Banknotes 2008 AA Series Circulated
					

100 Trillion Zimbabwe Banknotes 2008 AA Series Uncirculated




					www.greatamericancoincompany.com
				




You can get 10 trillion dollars in Zimbabwe funny money for like $500 USD


----------



## Stoneheart (Jul 13, 2021)

Onlyfans...


----------



## Justtocheck (Jul 13, 2021)

If you are hot you can get paid to fuck


----------



## Pringles Can (Jul 13, 2021)

pretty sure the bank gives you free money if you are wearing a ski mask and ask everyone nicely to get on the floor after entering dramatically. for some reason the cops don't like that though.


----------



## Getwhatyou (Jul 13, 2021)

Free money and lots of it without work? Hmmm everything requires a modicum of effort. 

Least effort? Robbery.


----------



## David Brown (Jul 13, 2021)

Gorgar said:


> I dunno; you help me, dude.
> No, seriously, I need a lot of money right now, but I want to make it myself.


Perceive the economy as being a vast series of trades. People trade one thing for another, typically they trade money for a good or service. This is how money is acquired. You trade things for money. For example, I trade my time, body, and skills for a paycheck. You should find out what things trade for high prices (to help your goal of getting "A Lot" of money) with a high volume (as in, there are many trades being made so that finding a buyer is easy and convenient. more trades = more money), and then narrow that list down to things you are able to provide. Then, trade those things you can provide for money. You may need to get creative.


----------



## wtfNeedSignUp (Jul 14, 2021)

Go to a casino, bet all your money on black, if you lose quit and restart.


----------



## Simple Moving Average (Jul 14, 2021)

Try to increase your income but always save money. Use the money saved to purchase additional income. See: https://kiwifarms.net/threads/money-saving-tips.94762/post-9443653


----------



## Proverbial Onion (Jul 14, 2021)

Just be confident bruh. Think positive.


----------



## Quato Lives! (Jul 14, 2021)

Buy some crack and smoke it.
You will be astounded at the amount of money you will make in a short time.
You will spend it all on crack as soon as you get it, but that's the rub.


----------



## Freshly Baked Socks (Jul 14, 2021)

Post drug/gun advertisements on the dep weeb.

Collect the bitcoins.

Profit.


----------



## Pissmaster (Jul 18, 2021)

Git gud at texas holdem and then just go to the casino and clean house


----------



## General Tug Boat (Jul 18, 2021)

Doesn't cost that much to Troon out, just get a wig, and a skirt and you'll be fine.


----------



## Łimønča (Jul 18, 2021)

Steal used cooking oil from restaurants, then sell it to make profit. If you can't afford the truck, just steal that too.


----------



## Bloitzhole (Jul 18, 2021)

It's just paper - print some, idiot.


----------



## Nero You're DeadWeight (Jul 18, 2021)

Sell used clothing on craigslist 
weirdos eat that shit UP


----------



## DoctorJimmyRay (Jul 18, 2021)

Theft. As in armed banditry. Find a Wells Fargo cash counting room and to plan a GTA style heist. You just need like 3 other people and a getaway vehicle. Get in and out in 3 minutes and you walk away with hundreds of thousands. Rinse and repeat. What could possibly go wrong?


----------



## Herr Flick (Jul 19, 2021)

Collect rocks from outside and sell them on Etsy to fat wiccans.


----------



## Fucky Chucky (Jul 25, 2021)

No bull shit and for a limited time only, Dogecoin is shooting up and it's cheap as fuck. I bought $20 of it a while ago and I bought more when I found out that my purchase was worth $1500+. Or you could rob a bank or some of this other shit but there is a good chance that if you just buy some of this Dogecoin bull shit you could be rich really soon. Don't over extend yourself. Only invest what you could stand losing but dude. This shit is crazy.


----------



## Moths (Jul 25, 2021)

Gorgar said:


> I dunno; you help me, dude.
> No, seriously, I need a lot of money right now, but I want to make it my


Have you tried whoring yourself out to a thousand fat chicks for 50 bucks a piece?
Or 50 REALLY fat chicks for 1000 bucks a piece


----------



## (((Oban Lazcano Kamz))) (Jul 25, 2021)

Herr Flick said:


> Collect rocks from outside and sell them on Etsy to fat wiccans.


or sell them to tom, @Miss Tommie Jayne Wasserberg


----------



## Game master arino (Jul 25, 2021)

here is one money.


----------



## ElliotRodger (Jul 26, 2021)

Buy Buttcoin


----------



## MerriedxReldnahc (Jul 26, 2021)

As a legit answer, I work in a cafe and make some good money off of tips alone. I'm the only person in the cafe so I don't have to split them with anyone right now, so in the future when we hire more people it won't be quite as bountiful. But if you don't mind people too much than you can make decent money in that kind of environment.


----------



## Save Goober (Jul 29, 2021)

1. Venture capital. These people have stupid money and are also fucking morons that regularly invest in obvious bullshit. You just need to be able to sell them a story about how your garbage app or iot piece of shit is going to be the next whatever. I assume that either having a feel good diversity background, or just being able to fit in with silicon valley retards to hook them will help sell your story and get the investment. You will need to produce some kind of piece of shit app for your "business" and hire people to try to make whatever it is, but the thing is they actually expect most of the crap they invest in to fail! So they won't look too hard when your Grindr clone inevitably fails and you should still have a load of money from your salary as CEO. Just don't pull a Theranos and make wild promises that can be conclusively proven false (fraud).
2. Take out massive student loans for a shitty degree but then leave the country and plan on never returning. Some people do this when they realize they're in over their head and can never pay the loans back, but why not get ahead with this plan from the start and live it up for a few years for free?


----------



## Carlos Weston Chantor (Jul 29, 2021)

You literally don't have do anything, just wait and let inflation do the thing. We will all soon be multi-millionaires. Alternatively you can buy any crypto since every crypto will soon be worth $1,000,000,000,000,000. There will be no food in stores at that point but you will have a lot of "money"


----------



## Rungle (Jul 29, 2021)

Scamming people is very fun, engaging, and gives you alot of money.

Take a picture of you in a dress, make a kickstarter for your bottom surgery and see money fly in from gullible retards who want to have virtue points.


----------



## Freshly Baked Socks (Jul 30, 2021)

Pissmaster said:


> Git gud at texas holdem and then just go to the casino and clean house


Alternately, host texas holdem online.
Fleece rubes.


----------



## Cup Noodle (Jul 30, 2021)

Justtocheck said:


> If you are hot you can get paid to fuck


Been there done that.  You feel really dirty afterwards.  Don't recommend.


Łimønča said:


> Steal used cooking oil from restaurants, then sell it to make profit. If you can't afford the truck, just steal that too.


Most restaurants have to pay to dispose of their oil.  I have a buddy who has a really successful restaurant specializing in fried foods that goes through a ton of oil.  Because he has such a large reliable stream of used oil he has someone who will buy it for ten cents a gallon.  He's told me that he would just give it to them but they offered to pay.  Don't blame him.  Steal the shit to make biodiesel and if you don't get caught get all the free oil you want and become a eco fuel kingpin.


KaibaCorp ToeSucker said:


> Sell used clothing on craigslist
> weirdos eat that shit UP


Better yet, be a Japanese schoolgirl and sell your used panties.  I wish that wasn't a thing.


MerriedxReldnahc said:


> As a legit answer, I work in a cafe and make some good money off of tips alone. I'm the only person in the cafe so I don't have to split them with anyone right now, so in the future when we hire more people it won't be quite as bountiful. But if you don't mind people too much than you can make decent money in that kind of environment.


Don't split your tips ever.  I've never worked for tips but I've dated and been married to those that have.  Like all socialism it just encourages the lazy to be even lazier.  Why be a good server when MxR will be extra good and pad your pay anyways?

It's really easy to get a job right now, but most jobs suck and don't pay well.  Step one is to get a shitty job.  Step two is to be really shitty at said shitty job.  Step three is to get fired from shitty job for being shitty and collect $600 a week unemployment.  Now you are being paid to shitpost on the farms.  Good job.


----------



## MerriedxReldnahc (Jul 30, 2021)

Cup Noodle said:


> Don't split your tips ever.  I've never worked for tips but I've dated and been married to those that have.  Like all socialism it just encourages the lazy to be even lazier.  Why be a good server when MxR will be extra good and pad your pay anyways?


Our tip situation is that there's a bucket by the register where people can deposit tips, we don't have restaurant style table service. So when someone's shift ends the tips get split from the bucket. Even when I work with another person I end up with the better end of the deal because I work more hours and I get the afternoon crowd. But if I was doing table service I definitely wouldn't be splitting my tips with anyone, fuck that.


----------



## 💗Freddie Freaker💗 (Aug 12, 2021)

If you suck a million cocks for $1 each you'll have a million dollars.


----------



## Vapid_Idiot (Aug 13, 2021)

set up an onlyfans and show your asshole


----------



## dinnuffindu (Aug 13, 2021)

💗Bitchstopher Columbitch💗 said:


> If you suck a million cocks for $1 each you'll have a million dollars.


Try to find some jews if you do this; you can charge full price, even though their dicks are half-off.

If you're looking for easy money, though, simply make a gofundme and use a picture of a "disadvantaged person".  Put up some sob story, like how you're living in a homeless encampment on Apple's undeveloped property and need money to take your retarded crotch droppings to the doctor.  Add something about being harassed by some cisgender horrible alt-right MAGA-hat wearing OTHER, and that cash'll just pour in.

Be careful, though: If you don't limit yourself, you could end up as vice president, getting grouped when Uncle Joe forgets you're an adult woman and not a preteen girl.  Isn't that a small price to pay for being rich, though? 

Alternatively, tell Jeff Bezos you've got a special space shuttle you've built for him, and when you've lured him into a dark place, beat his shiny egg-head to a bloody pulp (in minecraft) and take his wallet. Don't try this with Bill Gates though.¹




¹ https://devblogs.microsoft.com/oldnewthing/20200825-00/?p=104123
Edit: Grammar


----------



## Drkinferno72 (Aug 13, 2021)

Why don’t poor people just buy more money?


----------



## TheRedChair (Aug 21, 2021)

Drkinferno72 said:


> Why don’t poor people just buy more money?


Because they buy Nike Sneakers instead, speculate on that market hoping to make some money while not getting killed during a drive by.


----------



## Honk Hill (Aug 21, 2021)

Invest in funkopops.


----------



## Niggernerd (Aug 21, 2021)

GTA taught me to just punch hookers for money. You get good amounts but it takes a bit of time.


----------



## Kornula (Aug 21, 2021)

Start a "GoFundMe" for ChrisChan's legal defense fund.


----------



## DerKryptid (Aug 21, 2021)

Bumfights is still around right?


----------



## PaleTay (Aug 21, 2021)

Well first you need to be famous on the internet, next you start a cryptocurrency, before anyone hears about it buy a bunch, next make a youtube video and start tweeting about this amazing new crypto you found and how you think it will go to the moon, when they start buying you dump everything you have.


----------

