# Prediction thread



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 25, 2015)

Put together your predictions for the future. While funny ones are preferred, serious ones are welcome.

-President Barack Obama will make it through his presidency with no internment camps for Christians, Sharia Law or ushering of the Anti-Christ. Hardcore religious right speakers will be backpedaling like crazy.

-Author Harlan Ellison will die in his sleep, because he's too mean for death to take him out while he's awake.

-Ann Coulter will write a new book called, "Micks and Dagoes: Don't They Make You Want to Puke?". The chapters will include, The Original Star Trek is a Liberal Plot"and "Eugenicists are Right."

-A Brony will make headlines when he tries to adopt a human child that will be raised along with his pony waifu. Thus, creating a class-action lawsuit (or at least attempt one).

-World Net Daily or Alex Jones will make an article like this...

"If you look at the soil around any large U.S. city with a big underground homosexual population - Des Moines, Iowa, perfect example. Look at the soil around Des Moines. You can't build on it, you can't grow anything in it. The government says it's due to poor farming. But I know what's really going on. I know it's the queers. They're in it with the aliens. They're building landing strips for gay
Martians."


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## Abethedemon (Sep 25, 2015)

Metallica will release their new album sometime in the next millennium.

The Satanic Temple (the guys who built the baphomet statue in Detroit) will adopt a nicer platform and talk about fluffy bunnies and butterflies.

Sonic will finally get a fairly decent game.


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## Steamboat_Bill (Sep 25, 2015)

Adolf Hitler will have been found to have spent the 70s traveling through Bolivia as a Frank Sinatra impersonator.

The next big "progressive" cartoon to come down the pike will have fans that are worse than ever. Expect massive lynch mobs to come to the houses of the creators if they step out of line.

We will run out of original ideas for stories and spend the rest of eternity recycling the old ones.

The polka will come back as a social dance, and the viola will become the dominant instrument in popular music. Similarly, incredibly tight underwear will become mandatory for all musicians everywhere.

Time machines will be invented, but you'll only be able to look at the past, and not actually go to it, for fear of disrupting history.

The whole world will eventually destroy itself, leaving only us Kiwis and the revived zombies of Abe Lincoln and Lou Monte to restart civilization.


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## autisticdragonkin (Sep 25, 2015)

There will be a backlash against SJWs


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## DuskEngine (Sep 25, 2015)

Anime-related terror attacks.


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## Surtur (Sep 25, 2015)

Jesus returns, but it turns out he just needs work as a landscaper.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 25, 2015)

When Ron Paul dies, there will be mass suicides among his fanboys so they can join him in the afterlife.
I predict Glenn Beck's death will involve his messiah complex growing to the point that believes he can stop a hurricane just by going out and commanding it. Only to be impaled by a piece of a billboard will Bill Nye's face on it when he tries.
The 2016 presidential election will be determined by putting all the candidates in a sumo wrestling tournament. Thus, making Chris Christie the President of the United States. (Hillary Clinton is disqualified for biting.) 

Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth, Nostalgia Chick and Aaron Diaz will all die on the same day where they will be lead to a mysterious room by a man who looks like Jean-Paul Sartre. Thus, realizing they are all in Hell and their punishment is to spend the rest of eternity making each other miserable.


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## LazarusOwenhart (Sep 25, 2015)

George R.R Martin will reveal that there is only a single copy of The Winds Of Winter and it is hidden somewhere in a sealed titanium cylinder buried in the ground. Only a slobbering superfan who can decipher the clues in the first hundred or so books will be able to find it. One fan does so and in a remote corner of Angola she unearths a four inch thick paperback entitled "The Winds of Winter, Part 1 of 6. Part two coming 2035"


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## A Skeleton (Sep 25, 2015)

The Sonic franchise will be retired and My Little Pony will be canceled at the same time. Millions of autists partake in mass suicides all over the world


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## autism420 (Sep 25, 2015)

We dig up Patti.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 25, 2015)

The SJWs will discover that white jazz musician, Boney James, exists and go after him for cultural appropriation. Thus leading Nicki Minaj and Azula Banks to create their mediocre attempts at jazz albums which they will blame the white patriarchal music industry for when album sales hit an all time low.
To keep up his reputation of speed, rapper Tech N9ne invites John Moschitta, Jr. to drop a few lines in his next album. (Ok, that would be neat.)

Fourteen people will end up dead on a college campus when a gun fight erupts between a paraplegic, morbidly obese Latina and a transgender (male-to-female) black asexual over who's more oppressed.
A man dies of a brain aneurysm after getting into a conversation with twelve different people who all have conflicting personal pronouns.


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## Joan Nyan (Sep 26, 2015)

TRUMP will make America great again by constructing the great wall of China across the Mexican border.


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## nonnewtonian (Sep 26, 2015)

Jon-Kacho said:


> TRUMP will make America great again by constructing the great wall of China across the Mexican border.


And after 100 years of Latino-free peace, a giant Mexican will kick a hole in the wall.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 26, 2015)

Artist, Stjepan Sejic, will be found in a ditch, mauled to death by former feminist fans when they discover he applies his own male gaze when drawing Sunstone. Apparently, his attempt to appease them with a drawing of a jagged, long "u" with an out-of-lines sploch of color he claims is Nightwing's penis didn't work.
The host of the Joe Goes... series will need the jaws of life to pry Erica Henderson's hands off his neck when he looks at an issue of Squirrel Girl and congratulates her on making the first superhero with Down's Syndrome.


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## Bugaboo (Sep 26, 2015)

We will all die


Eventually and likely in a boring way


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 26, 2015)

The Red Lantern Corps will recruit Alex Jones who will immediately start rampaging Washington D.C. Only to be taken down by a green lantern ring-wielding Barak Obama.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 29, 2015)

Square-Enix will decide that its next six games will all be remakes of Final Fantasy 7.


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## DNJACK (Sep 29, 2015)

A police station will explodes mysteriously in Ottawa the 23 december 2015 at approximately 18:00. There will be no suspect.


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## AnOminous (Sep 29, 2015)

DNJACK said:


> A police station will explodes mysteriously in Ottawa the 23 december 2015 at approximately 18:00. There will be no suspect.



I predict that if that happens, there will be exactly one suspect.


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## Ariel (Sep 29, 2015)

The Rapture will happen before the year is out.... Thanks Obeme


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 1, 2015)

I predict these future articles...

*From Everyday Feminism*
-From MC Search to Macklemore: How Dare White People Rap (Even the Good Ones)
-Why Elvis Should Be Dug Up and Set On Fire With Graceland
-Black Country Singers: Self-Hating Suck-Ups To the White Patriarchy or Victims of Enforced Assimilation?
-Am I Missgendering My Cats?
-Gay, White CIS Men Are Now On Our Shitlist 
-"Shut-up and Put On That Dress!": Forcing Your Kid to Be Non-Binary
-The Internalized Racism of My Black Son's Love of Merle Haggard.
-How to Make Your White Allies Cry
-Man-Breathing: The New Threat to Womankind
*
From The Mary Sue*
-What Do You Mean Furry Belle is a Parody of SJWs?
-Of Course Nikki Minaj Would Make a Great Iron Man!
-Why No, the Way Tuxedo Mask Treated Sailor Moon In the Dark Moon Saga Was Not Problematic
-Erica Henderson is Making Squirrel Girl a Nudist With No Censorship. A Victory For Women Everywhere!
-Dull Gray, a Great New Trend in Designing Female Characters. 
-Anita Sarkeesian's Top Ten Fashion Tips
-Female, Asian, Pansexual Paraplegic Doesn't Get the Role of Indiana Jones? Whhhhyyyyy?
-Poll: Favorite Way to Masturbate to Dick Grayson

*From Bikini Armor Battle Damage*
-I Don't Care If Those Ladies Aren't Real. Boobplate on Fictional Characters is Murder!
-Why Big Breasts On Women Who Are Not Fat Don't Exist, Damnit!
-Even More Bitching About Quiet
-Why Women Who Are Not Conventionally Pretty Don't Count
-Coping Techniques When You See A Bare Ankle


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 13, 2015)

In attempts to appease the SJWs, Hollywood will remake Back to the Future with Chris Rock as Doc Brown. Thus leaving the good ladies at The Mary Sue in turmoil when they come to the conclusion that despite the fact that they did a race change, the movie will actually have to make the character goofy and silly.


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## AnOminous (Oct 13, 2015)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> In attempts to appease the SJWs, Hollywood will remake Back to the Future with Chris Rock as Doc Brown. Thus leaving the good ladies at The Mary Sue in turmoil when they come to the conclusion that despite the fact that they did a race change, the movie will actually have to make the character goofy and silly.



Chris Rock would not be a good replacement from an SJW standpoint.

He hates that shit.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 13, 2015)

AnOminous said:


> Chris Rock would not be a good replacement from an SJW standpoint.
> 
> He hates that shit.


Now who would be more SJW-friendly?


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## Steamboat_Bill (Oct 13, 2015)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> Now who would be more SJW-friendly?



A trans POC actor, of course.


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## Zorceror44 (Oct 13, 2015)

Fez 2, developed by Yacht Club Games after buying the license from Phil Fish, is a massive hit and is the most critically acclaimed puzzle-platformer of all time. In an unrelated incident, Phil Fish cries himself to sleep.
After North Korea declares war on the US, a single bottle rocket falls from the sky in Washington DC.
Chris-Chan gets a show on TLC, which makes the general public sympathize with him and make him a celebrity overnight. News reporters everywhere wonder who this hacker named "Kiwi Farms" is.
Zach Snyder announces "Goku V Superman" causing nerds everywhere to collectively shit their pants, only to find out it's coming after the eight-installment Dragon Ball movie franchise, causing them to shit their pants even more.


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## Deadwaste (Oct 13, 2015)

Hoverboards will be commercially available in 2016, Bernie wins the presidency, and the white rhino will go extinct within the next 5 years more or less.


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## LazarusOwenhart (Oct 13, 2015)

I will be right about everything and you lot will regret not listening to me when you had the chance.


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## Jack Haywood (Oct 17, 2015)

Everyone dies. The end.


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## 女鬼 (Oct 17, 2015)

A particularly violent epidemic will ravage America, on a level comparable to the AIDS crisis.

With much difficulty, the origin of this new pathogen will eventually be traced to the bloated corpse of an unidentified vagrant, found dead under a bridge, clad in a "PROUD LATINX" shirt and bondage gear.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 17, 2015)

Given the plague of SJWs, people everywhere gather together to make a giant public appology to the Bronies for once calling them the most annoying fucks on the internet.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 29, 2015)

In attempt to pander even more to their fanbase, the writers for MLP decide to do an episode about accepting others who have unusual features with Milk Mare (NSFW). Where the Mane 6 will help her over come her insecurity over her enormous crotch teats by using them (when they over swell from not milking them) to put out a fire.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 30, 2015)

Since looking professional at work is oppression, Everyday Feminism posts an article about how excepting people to bathe and wear deodorant is "scent-shaming". For their scent is a natural thing that shouldn't be covered up by the white patriarchy's soap and deodorants that shamed their people into being "clean". Either that or it becomes the latest 4Chan prank.


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## GS 281 (Oct 30, 2015)

This site will become overrun by trannies with axes to grind


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## Another Fellow (Oct 30, 2015)

These are quite long and probably very spergy too, but they were fun to write and I like making predictions like this. I decided to write each as a full mini-story, instead of a sentence or two, because "concise" is not usually a word used to describe me. Nevertheless, I hope these jumbles of sentence-like ravings can find an audience...



Spoiler: North Korea's Secret Weapon



On its country's last legs, the North Korean army undergoes a project to develop a fleet of cheap and practical armored vehicles in one last hope of military success. Due to a translation error and general misunderstandings, much of their information on the West's armored vehicles comes from the Lolcow Wiki article on the Race War Van. As a result, the army opts to use this failed design for their own project. Dubbed "Glorious Juche War Vans," six of the planned 1,000 vans enter production, costing North Korea its entire war budget: 45,000,000 won, equivalent to $45 USD.

Due to resource constraints, the vans are only standard in that they all have wheels and are self-powered. Notably, only three regular engines could be provided; consequentially, vans #4 and #5 are powered by crude steam engines constructed from 55-gallon drums and cardboard paper-towel tubes. Van #6, the last to be built, uses a water-wheel to drive itself forward, powered by a bucket reservoir duct-taped to the roof. Armament varies from van to van, although all six have the "People's Liberator" mounted on the passenger side. This is little more than a Nerf gun with a single thumbtack glued to the nose of each dart.

No country on Earth bothers to declare war, opting to sit back and laugh together at these sad pieces of crap. Nevertheless, North Korea bravely declares war on an abandoned farm near the DMZ, a possible excuse to show the might of their new vans to the West. Tragically, 53 valiant soldiers perish on the first day when GJWV #4 collides with an abandoned tractor and starts a grass fire.





Spoiler: Operation: Tumblr Underground



97% of Tumblr's user base sign a petition declaring natural light to be triggering. Plans and talks to establish an underground "Tumblr colony" to move into initially come fast and free, but the project grinds to a halt when none of the project heads are willing to put their hard-earned Patreon monies towards it. Additionally, none of the Tumblrites are inclined to actually build the colony, calling physical labor triggering as well.

The American and Russian governments begin talks to merge the Tumblr colony project with the Chernobyl New Safe Confinement project, but call off the idea when they realize the resulting toxicity levels would likely destroy the Earth.





Spoiler: A Tranny in the Cishet White Male House?



As the Trump administration's third term winds down, a tranny announces intentions to run for POTUS as a third-party candidate, with a non-binary pee-oh-see as their running mate. Promising true equality and prosperity for all, including cishet white males, the candidates win support from coast to coast and all political stripes.

SJWs rejoice, until it is found out that (among other alleged transgressions) the candidates have only one set of pronouns each, are physically and mentally fit, and the tranny successfully passes as their desired sex. Rumors of grand-scale election boycotts in the major cities spread like wildfire, and the candidates are flooded with letters accusing them of every prejudice under the sun, real and imagined.

Finally, on the morning of Election Day, the boycotts are to begin. By the end of the voting session, the tranny and the poc win by a close majority with little to no boycott troubles. Records obtained from area police departments prepared for full-scale riots instead find that about 45-60 boycotters had gathered in all 15 of the cities decided as gathering places. The only injured party in the entirety of the boycotts was seven-year-old Tommy Watson, a young black boy from Des Moines who scraped his knee when he was knocked over by a white HAES activist trying to pursue a passing ice cream truck. Tumblr hears of this, but collectively shits itself and does nothing.





Spoiler: Sonichu: A Modern Classic



After much deliberation and talks with Chris, Cartoon Network greenlights _Sonichu: The Animated Series_ as the new flagship show of its Adult Swim block. Adapted from the original comic books, the show follows Sonichu, Rosechu, Chris and the rest of CWCville on the adventures and struggles of their lives, featuring intricate, emotional plotlines and what entertainment critics called "some of the best, least autistic characters in history." The two-hour series debut, based on _Sonichu 0_, is received with critical acclaim, and awarded at least one of every accolade in the television industry, including several created specifically for _S:TAS_. Video games, toys, and other merchandise are brought out, and a live-action movie is in the works, starring a flesh-and-blood, genetically engineered Sonichu.

The twist is that this prediction actually happened...in Chris's mind.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 21, 2015)

When getting upset over people dressing like Indians and Geisha for Halloween becomes old hat, SJWs decide that period costumes (flappers, greasers, non-steampunk Victorian ladies, cowboys, etc) from before 1965 are now offensive. Given those times were bad for minorites and its a display of white supremacy to dress from those eras.


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## LazarusOwenhart (Nov 22, 2015)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> When getting upset over people dressing like Indians and Geisha for Halloween becomes old hat, SJWs decide that period costumes (flappers, greasers, non-steampunk Victorian ladies, cowboys, etc) from before 1965 are now offensive. Given those times were bad for minorites and its a display of white supremacy to dress from those eras.


They're not going to be truly happy until every white person without a Tumblr account has to wear a flat, grey, sack cloth smock with "SORRY" stenciled on the front.


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## Vex Overmind (Nov 25, 2015)

A Keeper of Secrets is teleported into a liberal College campus, causing all of the students to engage in masochistic acts.

A Black Lives Matter protest suddenly ends up becoming a battleground for Tzeentch cultist who want to use the group to cause more terror and lulz, while Khorne cultist are just there to start shit.

Nurgle's rot begins to infect Europe thanks to the influx of migrants.

Donald Trump reveals himself as the Human-Emperor of mankind, and creates 20 legions of genetically modified super soldiers that begin to take over the world, thus the Imperium of Trump begins.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 7, 2015)

Everyday Feminism latest article: "Politeness and Privilege: How good manners is holding us back".


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## John Titor (Dec 9, 2015)

- 2015: American Civil War averted, thanks to Trump running for president.

- 2016: Trump wins election.

- 2017: Trump assassinated. Things start going to Hell and America gets splintered into many nations. Lottery systems in the United States has been discontinued. (Seriously guys, stop asking).

- 2018: Second American Civil War breaks out, cause unknown.

- 2019: Someone on the Kiwi Farms is a traitor and will sell us out to the SJWs and be sent to re-education camps. Trust no one.

- 2020: Viral epidemic kills 95% of world's supply of weed.

- 2023: Gabe Newell killed. Valve bombed, literally, all traces of Half-Life 3 disappears.

- 2031: GMOs will finally bite us in the ass.

- 2036: I warn my alternate timeline selves about what went wrong and try again.

- 2101: War was beginning.

In case you're wondering, Chris still shits in his pants and does nothing.


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## Bugaboo (Dec 9, 2015)

Tumblr sjws will become so hostile to their own kind the entire website will explode


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 19, 2015)

Diagnosed with a terminal illness, Hideo Kojima pools all of his money to make Quiet a character in the next five Super Smash Bros game. Then sends a video to every feminist geek culture website of him laughing on his deathbed. 

Shitty Webcomics makes a comeback that lasts barely a month when people realize that the ladies in those rape pics look a little too "realistic".


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## DrJonesHat (Dec 21, 2015)

Desperate for money after the failure of her Women in Gaming Tropes series, Anita Sarkeesian begins moonlighting as a professional dominatrix to pay the bills. All goes well for several years and she's quite successful until her client list is stolen by a hacker and big names in the MRA movement are revealed as long-standing clients of hers, notably Thunderf00t and Vox Day.


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## GolgoXIII (Dec 21, 2015)

Bronies will become extinct.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jan 3, 2016)

-Feminists and SJWs everywhere discover that the band, Steel Panther (NSFW), exists and I get some popcorn to watch the mayhem.
-The Mary-Sue does an article demanding that Ink Master stops letting white, cishet, able bodied men win the competitions and have no more than three of these kind of people per season. Laughs are to be had by all.
-Clementine Ford will die just like this.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jan 31, 2016)

-In attempt to get some ratings, Doug Walker will do a massive film crossover involving both former and current members of Channel Awesome in a Battle Royale parody. And let's just say that all the deaths aren't fake.
-Despite getting an egg beater in his bag, Mike J wins the competition with five kills to his name (including zombie JewWario).​


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Feb 17, 2016)

To expand beyond their anime geek fanbase, the LeetStreet Boys will try to audition for America's Got Talent. No good will come from it.


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## Abethedemon (Feb 17, 2016)

Justin Bieber will break free of his record label and start recording kvlt low-quality bedroom black metal under the name Northern Pariah.


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## ASoulMan (Feb 17, 2016)

- Dolan Tramp becomes President and then executes Order 69 on the trannies. He then creates a peaceful empire out of the United States of A Murica and everyone lives happily ever after.

- Something about SJWs

- @Roger Rabbit returns and is crowned the new owner of the Farms.

- Shit happens

- Something else involving SJWs

- Brianna Wu joins the Wu-Tang Clan

- Chris lives to the ripe old age of 300 years old. Barb still manages to outlive him as nothing more than a mummified corpse.

- Tumblr triggers itself and dies

- This thread gets flooded with Autism


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Apr 9, 2016)

Vex Overmind said:


> Donald Trump reveals himself as the Human-Emperor of mankind, and creates 20 legions of genetically modified super soldiers that begin to take over the world, thus the Imperium of Trump begins.



But they'll all be clones of him.


It will be revealed that Phelous and Obscurous Lupa have been married in secret for the last year or so and have been inviting Brad Jones for kinky threesomes.
Four prison abolitionists will be found shot full of holes when the drug dealer they were hiding is revealed to be a deranged serial killer.


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## Abethedemon (Apr 9, 2016)

H.P. Lovecraft rises from the dead and publishes a long lost book called "Call of the Millenials"


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## Really makes you thunk (Apr 9, 2016)

-Germany becomes the capital of the Muslim world, and is renamed The Holy Islamic Caliphate of Germany.

-After becoming the final president of the United States, and first Emperor of the American Alliance, Donald Trump challenges Kim Jong Un to single combat over the title of Intergalactic ambassador of Earth. At first, the North Korean leader manages to best Trump and strike him down. Before he is able to celebrate victory, however, a resurrected Trump rides down on a beam of light with his holy surfboard from the heavens- back into the arena, more powerful than anyone can possibly imagine. He destroys his nemesis, and enjoys a millennia on his throne as God-Emperor.

-Valve never makes Half Life 3. Instead, they sell the rights to Bioware to make the long awaited sequel in their stead. The first thing Bioware does with the ip is remake HL2 for 'the CoD audience', written by Jennifer Hepler, where Alyx is a trans woman, and Breen is the only white man in the game. The dev team consists entirely of affirmative-action placed minorities. The game gets received poorly, causing Bioware to go on a(nother) tirade against 'Gamer entitlement' and never makes HL3.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 17, 2016)

Tiring of the real world, a group of anarch-capitalists and a group of college protestors decide to create their own society only for both groups to realize they accidentally bought the same island. Screaming, slap fights and death by incompetence is had by all.


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## Steamboat_Bill (May 17, 2016)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> Tiring of the real world, a group of anarch-capitalists and a group of college protestors decide to create their own society only for both groups to realize they accidentally bought the same island. Screaming, slap fights and death by incompetence is had by all.



Bravo picks it up as a TV show and it becomes a huge success.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 27, 2016)

Venereal disease becomes the in thing among SJWs doing headcannons and character design. So prepare for pictures of herpes sores and hashtags called, #givespidermansyphilis.


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## Zeorus (May 27, 2016)

2017: Philip Haskins-Delici is found dead in rural Washington after a horrific figging accident.  The reboot of _Twin Peaks_ will somehow be involved.


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## Deadwaste (Jun 15, 2016)

Deadwaste said:


> Bernie wins the presidency


Well fuck me sideways like a Vietnamese chink.

Well then, I predict another mass shooting within this year, preferably within the next month or so.


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## Deadwaste (Jul 14, 2016)

Deadwaste said:


> Well fuck me sideways like a Vietnamese chink.
> 
> Well then, I predict another mass shooting within this year, preferably within the next month or so.


You know, I didnt expect to be right on the same prediction twice(more or less).


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## exball (Jul 14, 2016)

Deadwaste said:


> Well then, I predict another mass shooting within this year, preferably within the next month or so.


Oh come on, we have mass shootings at least once a month now, you may as well have been cheating.


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## Closet Sorcerer (Jul 14, 2016)

- On April Fools, Gaben reveals that Half-Life 3 will be a Facebook game. Valve HQ gets besieged by a mob.

- Trump wins the presidency but dies of a heart attack right after the vote count.

- YandereDev finally gives up and disappears with his Patreonbucks after ordering a thousand of high quality sex dolls. He surfaces 10 years later after being arrested in Japan for rape.

- Alex C. Leal catches a fox and tries to fuck it, but gets bitten in the process. He dies of rabies.


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## Abethedemon (Jul 14, 2016)

Trump wins the presidency and then reveals it's all a ruse to promote his new show. Vermin Supreme then becomes president.


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## NQ 952 (Jul 14, 2016)

I predict another islamic terrorist will kill people eventually.


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## Deadwaste (Jul 30, 2016)

LordKaT said:


> I predict another islamic terrorist will kill people eventually.


Well you weren't wrong.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Aug 13, 2016)

After years of ill-fitting dye jobs, Milo Yiannopoulos's hair finally revolts and puts a restraining order on him.


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## StarvingAutist (Aug 14, 2016)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> After years of ill-fitting dye jobs, Milo Yiannopoulos's hair finally revolts and puts a restraining order on him.



Milo blames "regressive neo-Marxist feminists" for the loss of his hair.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Aug 28, 2016)

The sad, painful truth will come when it is revealed that McDonalds has been behind the fat acceptance movement the whole time.


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## ToroidalBoat (Aug 29, 2016)

A kitten will be startled by a popcorn machine.


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## BurningPewter (Aug 29, 2016)

_Everyday Femnism -Gay, White CIS Men Are Now On Our Shitlist 

IIRC _Jezebel did that a couple of years ago.   It was based around around the author having once known a woman-hating gay man who said loudly "I gotta go, I smell fish!" and leaving every time her and her other "fag hag" friends turned up.  She looked into it and found out some gay men hate women.  (ie they don't want to play the gay friend stereotype).   Cue lots of crying in the comments by other women who's gay collegues won't live up to the gay friend stereotype well enough.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 7, 2016)

I predict this future article from the Huffington Post: "Why it's not rape when a Muslim does it. (Especially against white people."


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## Curt Sibling (Nov 7, 2016)

As Hillary is declaring victory today, a drunk reptiloid will stagger onstage with his pants down, having celebrated prematurely. This will cause a stock market crash and riots in the scaly community.


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## Todesfurcht (Nov 8, 2016)

By the year 2030 we will have actual virtual reality, where the player IS inside the game.


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## Deadwaste (Nov 8, 2016)

Todesfurcht said:


> By the year 2030 we will have actual virtual reality, where the player IS inside the game.


If I die in the game do I die irl?


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## Todesfurcht (Nov 8, 2016)

Deadwaste said:


> If I die in the game do I die irl?



Probably not, but it'll hurt like a bitch.


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## Florence (Nov 8, 2016)

The Rev 60 patch will not be released.


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## Trilby (Nov 9, 2016)

Noticing this map, it's no wonder Trump caters to rural America (the blue is where all the major cities in state are).


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## Deadwaste (Nov 9, 2016)

Trilby said:


> Noticing this map, it's no wonder Trump caters to rural America (the blue is where all the major cities in state are).
> View attachment 151663


There's a reason


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## Trilby (Nov 9, 2016)

Deadwaste said:


> There's a reason


Thanks, I suppose I should've had that in mind the whole time but I like to forget that's ever a thing.


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## Deadwaste (Nov 10, 2016)

Trilby said:


> Thanks, I suppose I should've had that in mind the whole time but I like to forget that's ever a thing.


Hold on there was an update!


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## Trilby (Nov 10, 2016)

Deadwaste said:


> Hold on there was an update!


Haha!


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## gaybashing<3 (Nov 21, 2016)

someone gay's gonna try to run for pres


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 21, 2016)

gaybashing<3 said:


> someone gay's gonna try to run for pres


Milo Yiannopoulos 2024. (He'll be old enough by then.)


----------



## Bassomatic (Nov 21, 2016)

Can't he's not US born cit.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 22, 2016)

I predict these future Everyday Feminism articles...

-How to Break Your White, CIShet Male Significant Other's Spirit In 5 Easy Steps.
-Scent-Shaming: Why I Don't Subscribe To the Shaming of Natural Body Odors.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 26, 2016)

All of Laci Green's STDs will finally kill each other in a battle for domination and take her with them in the form of a massive, spontaneous human combustion.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 31, 2016)

-Hilary Clinton will finally meet her demise when Barron Trump throws a water balloon at her, causing her to melt.


----------



## Steamboat_Bill (Dec 31, 2016)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> -Hilary Clinton will finally meet her demise when Barron Trump throws a water balloon at her, causing her to melt.



Alternately: Hillary is revealed for the lizard woman she is, and when her true form is revealed she will retreat back into the darkness she came from.

And we all rejoice... but little do we know that Trump is a lizard man as well, and so are all his cabinet members! (What a twist!)


----------



## ULTIMATEPRIMETIME (Jan 4, 2017)

the white race is going to become a minority


----------



## Trilby (Jan 4, 2017)

ULTIMATEPRIMETIME said:


> the white race is going to become a minority


Which I don't mind at all.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Mar 21, 2017)

It will be revealed that Funny Valentine had recently found his earthly counterpart, Donald Trump, had him run for president and is now enjoying his cushy presidential job.


----------



## Florence (Mar 22, 2017)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> It will be revealed that Funny Valentine had recently found his earthly counterpart, Donald Trump, had him run for president and is now enjoying his cushy presidential job.


----------



## Syaoran Li (Mar 22, 2017)

This one is for all the people who are familiar with the constant forum drama within the tabletop RPG community. So, without further to do, here's my prediction of the future of tabletop RPG communities in the coming years.

White Wolf's newest attempts at reviving World of Darkness fail miserably and Paradox shuts down White Wolf. Martin Ericsson then moves to Branson, Missouri so he can drink himself to death like Nicholas Cage in _Leaving Las Vegas. _He succeeds in his mission. Andrew Eldritch delivers the eulogy while Siouxsie and the Banshees serve as the pallbearers. Despite being a pallbearer, Siouxsie Sioux is afraid to actually touch Ericsson's coffin, believing it to be bad luck. As a result, the coffin tumbles and the former CEO of White Wolf gets pantsed at his own funeral. Nobody else attends Ericsson's funeral because there is a cash bar and Goth music sucks.

With White Wolf defunct, Onyx Path will go bankrupt and a lot of butthurt SJW freelancers will have to get real jobs. Meanwhile, RPG.net rejoices when Martin Ericsson's alcohol-infused pants are discovered in the bushes near Silver Dollar City (since he didn't get a decent burial). This victory is short-lived as the administration of RPG.net end up involved in a complicated Ponzi Scheme with Lady Gaga, Silvio Berlusconi, and the Saudi Royal Family. Gaga and the Saudi Royals are acquitted while several RPG.net mods and Admins are sent to federal prison for the rest of their lives. Silvio Berlusconi ends up serving twenty minutes of a life sentence before purchasing RPG.net and shutting it down. He then meets up with Trump and the two throw a massive bunga-bunga party at the Villa Jovis on the island of Capri. Many former Onyx Path freelancers are at this party as live entertainment. Berlusconi and Trump refer to them as "Little Fishes"

The Forge goes under after Ron Edwards is convicted of high treason by the Crown of Norway. Edwards is sentenced to 21 years in prison and is placed in the same cell as mass shooter Anders Bering Brevik.

Finally, somewhere at a country club in Uruguay, The RPG Pundit is sipping on a glass of fine Scotch, smoking a Cuban cigar, smiling in joy.

"It has gone exactly as planned!" he mutters to himself before taking another sip of Scotch and joining his buddy Zak Sabbath for a fine game of old-school D&D in the front parlor of the country club.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 3, 2017)

There will be a news report of 40 dead during a fat acceptance convention when the floor gives way due to all the combined weight.


----------



## Morose_Obesity (May 3, 2017)

I predict that actual telepaths exist and are employed by major world governments, this revelation will make thousands of mentally ill people lose their collective shit.


----------



## Trilby (May 3, 2017)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> There will be a news report of 40 dead during a fat acceptance convention when the floor gives way due to all the combined weight.


Now that's comedy!


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 11, 2017)

Realizing that fingers are phallic looking, radfems everywhere start chopping them off. Hundreds die from the massive blood loss.


----------



## Curt Sibling (May 11, 2017)

Anita Sarkeesian is caught blowing Alex Jones.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 26, 2017)

College "white privilege classes" will have special finals for the white students where they are given a vial of cyanide and told to ingest it. 

Ann Coulter will meet her death when her body gets so thin that it ends up caving-in on itself.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jun 24, 2017)

A family in Sweden will be condemned for Islamophobia when they refuse to let a migrant marry their 6-year-old daughter.


----------



## Deadwaste (Jun 24, 2017)

there's gonna be another revolution in bumblefuck, middle eastern country like the past 50 or so that's happened with the past 2 decades


----------



## Morose_Obesity (Jun 24, 2017)

Chris will crash their car when the beetis finally hits hard, it will seriously injure or kill somebody, he'll t-bone them in excess of 30mph.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jul 3, 2017)

Gavin McInnis' machismo will be put on trial when he is caught in Rebel Media's utility closet, playing the Delicious series, sobbing his eyes out in shame and screaming, "I totally get you, Francois!".


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 25, 2017)

Steve Shives and the host of Adam Ruins Everything get into a slap fight; there are no survivors.

Milo Yinapolis will meet his end in an orgy, smothered by a pile of well-hung black men.


----------



## Deadwaste (Sep 25, 2017)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> Steve Shives and the host of Adam Ruins Everything get into a slap fight; there are no survivors.
> 
> Milo Yinapolis will meet his end in an orgy, smothered by a pile of well-hung black men.


both of those would be very entertaining and i would like to see this happen


----------



## WW 635 (Sep 27, 2017)

A fat balding autistic who looks twice his actual age will try to take out Bitcoin in another desperate attempt to have his thread taken down on Kiwifarms


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 27, 2017)

-SJWs will claim that any white person taking welfare is guilty of cultural appropriation.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 1, 2017)

A colossal earthquake hits Sweden from the collective spinning of their viking ancestors' graves.
Chase the greased-up deaf guy becomes an Olympic sport.


----------



## Deadwaste (Oct 3, 2017)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> All of Laci Green's STDs will finally kill each other in a battle for domination and take her with them in the form of a massive, spontaneous human combustion.


eh, at least she's more open to listening to other people now
also she's dating chris ray gun


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 3, 2017)

Deadwaste said:


> eh, at least she's more open to listening to other people now
> also she's dating chris ray gun


That was a rather old post before she got pilled.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 27, 2017)

-Daikari King Mykan's latest Beast Boy's Magic Voices video will be of Steel Pather's "Gloryhole". (Yes, he still does them.)


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 15, 2017)

With the increased Islamic influence in European schools, Swedish schools offer to take girls to get their clits removed by a real Muslim. (Because anesthesia is part of the white supremacy.)


----------



## FierceBrosnan (Nov 15, 2017)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> With the increased Islamic influence in European schools, Swedish schools offer to take girls to get their clits removed by a real Muslim. (Because anesthesia is part of the white supremacy.)



Will that be before or after they are forced into marriage at 8ish years old?


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 15, 2017)

FierceBrosnan said:


> Will that be before or after they are forced into marriage at 8ish years old?


I'd say before.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 21, 2017)

After remembering that I Love Lucy exists, Hari Kondabolu watches a few episodes, gets triggered and creates a new documentary called, The Scourge of Ricky Ricardo. Because how dare Desi Arnaz be able to poke fun at his own accent.
Germany will have a school assignment where girls will pretend to be married to Muslim men for the weekend and write a report about it. Any that lose their virginity have to marry them for real.
The boys will get to explore the lifestyles of middle eastern bacha bazi boys. The ugly ones are exempt from the assignment. 

Diversity & Comics and Nerkish will meet at a local comic convention, get into a heated argument over whether pets are evil, start making out and end up being in bed together.


----------



## Deadwaste (Nov 21, 2017)

stephen winchell gets a movie deal with sony for a animated film adaption of nattycomic


----------



## DrJonesHat (Nov 21, 2017)

The apocalypse is canceled and millions of would-be prophets are out of work.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 21, 2017)

SJW parents can now give their kids breastmilk from real transmen. But the testerone, hormones and drugs effect the milk, make it the thalidomide of the 2010s.


----------



## spigot the bear (Nov 24, 2017)

TIMES chooses Elon Musk on person of the year.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 25, 2017)

Taylor Swift gets her revenge on Kanye West when he recieves an award for best album, she bursts in, interrupts the presentation to say that Beyonce's album sucked even more and leaves.


----------



## DrJonesHat (Nov 25, 2017)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> Taylor Swift gets her revenge on Kanye West when he recieves an award for best album, she bursts in, interrupts the presentation to say that Beyonce's album sucked even more and leaves.


She should actually do this. No one would blame her, including Beyonce.

EDIT: In a breakthrough of earth-shattering importance, contact is made with the afterlife, and it turns out it's whatever you think it will be when you die. Hellfire preaching pastors are shot on sight.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 19, 2017)

In the futrue all thoughts and communications will be expressed through sassy Beyonce gifs.
The migrant take over of Scotland will add these new events to the Highland Games: the stoning throw, bacha bazi boy chase and the battered wife toss (with special divisions for adult and child brides).


----------



## Steamboat_Bill (Dec 19, 2017)

Next year will not be a very good year for at least 80% of people.

I can feel it in my bones.


----------



## Curt Sibling (Dec 19, 2017)

The combined autism of Kiwi Farms will evolve into a gestalt lifeform and proceed to run amock at a furry con.


----------



## Dolphin Lundgren (Dec 20, 2017)

I keep thinking that in the future we'll have some kind of civil war because of the massive political difference, paranoia and fighting that has separated people. And that all this fear will build up and turn into something big.


----------



## TheClorax (Dec 20, 2017)

Someone (probably me) will release mustard gas at a furry convention.


----------



## Deadwaste (Dec 20, 2017)

Oscar Wildean said:


> I keep thinking that in the future we'll have some kind of civil war because of the massive political difference, paranoia and fighting that has separated people. And that all this fear will build up and turn into something big.


#IWantToBelieve


----------



## DrJonesHat (Dec 20, 2017)

Curt Sibling said:


> The combined autism of Kiwi Farms will evolve into a gestalt lifeform and proceed to run amock at a furry con.


The server the Farms runs on will achieve sapience, and since it's evolved from the forum, it will do nothing but shitpost non-stop.


----------



## Dolphin Lundgren (Dec 20, 2017)

Deadwaste said:


> #IWantToBelieve


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 30, 2017)

Jin will be found dead in his appartment due to his new diet of strictly eating his "wife", Twilight Sparkle's, bodily fluids.


----------



## Chaos Theorist (Dec 30, 2017)

The Tories will lose the General Election after Brexit inevitably goes tits up leading Corbyn to cut a deal with either the SNP or Lib-Dems in a coalition. Nigel Farage will become the most hated person since Thatcher and will become the scapegoat for Brexit being such a mess.
The current Antifa and Alt-Right/White Nationalist movements will devolve into terrorism and straight-out violence.
Nintendo will release either a fully portable Switch or a 3DS successor.
The skeptic movement will fully explode when the Alt-Right devolves into violence.
CWC will be put into a group home.
Moviebob will die alone and will probably contract diabeetus.
The 2020 election will devolve into a shitshow unless the Democrats field either Sanders or an actual alternative to Trump.
The major American ISPs will try and censor the net leading to a new internet to begin.
There will be another war in either the Middle East.
China will invade North Korea or force Kim out to stop America sniffing around.


----------



## Deadwaste (Jan 10, 2018)

as the world war 2 vets begin dying off, the vietnam war becomes more popular in film and games despite the fact we fucking lost


----------



## DrJonesHat (Jan 10, 2018)

One of Harry Turtledove's alternate history series will be made into a Netflix series.

Aliens show up in orbit around Earth, take one look at the state of affairs on this rock, and haul ass back to their home system. Maps circulated amongst the members of space-faring civilizations have a big warning label on the Sol system that says simply "fucking crazy" in some alien language.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Feb 3, 2018)

-The latest Potty Mouth Princess video will be done in Hati to prove it's not a shithole country. The princesses can now be found in a bunch of different trashbags after they all took an unmarked cab home.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Feb 8, 2018)

Trudeau will make good on his offer to take Vladmir Putin on in a "winner gets the loser's country" fight. You can guess where this is going.


----------



## Steamboat_Bill (Feb 8, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> Trudeau will make good on his offer to take Vladmir Putin on in a "winner gets the loser's country" fight. You can guess where this is going.



It turns into a tag-team match with Trump, Merkel, Macron and May?


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Mar 2, 2018)

The next Oscars will have Black Panther win every award, including best animated feature and documentry.


----------



## Kiwi Jeff (Apr 10, 2018)

I predict a new F-Zero


----------



## LazarusOwenhart (Apr 10, 2018)

Kiwi Jeff said:


> I predict a new F-Zero


If you are right look for a stratosphere piercing fountain of nerd jizz which will briefly show anybody in at least one quarter of the world exactly where my house is.


----------



## Hui (Apr 10, 2018)

Kiwi Jeff said:


> I predict a new F-Zero


----------



## Red Hood (Apr 10, 2018)

People will re-evaluate Wonder Woman and Black Panther for being the middling disposable superhero movies they are and not equivalents to Goodfellas or Casablanca.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Apr 19, 2018)

To appologize even more, Starbucks will change its name to "Dindu Muffins".


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Apr 21, 2018)

A group of SJWs will cause a riot when they come across an Isadora Duncan exhibit, learn that she is the precursor of modern dance, and get horribly triggered.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 2, 2018)

A cult start forming around Beyonce until she gets a cut on her face during one of her concerts. Realizing that she can bleed like a mere mortal, the cult goes berserk with no survivors.


----------



## Trilby (May 2, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> A cult start forming around Beyonce until she gets a cut on her face during one of her concerts. Realizing that she can bleed like a mere mortal, the cult goes berserk with no survivors.


Some people just don't have lives.


----------



## CodpieceraggabrasH (May 4, 2018)

Tumblr will be more cancerous than ever. And by that, I mean so cancerous that when you read even one post, you can almost immediately feel tumors growing on your brain and proceed to spread to the rest of your body.


----------



## Black Waltz (May 4, 2018)

A group of particularly deranged SJWs will take a page from their precious Islamic terrorists and attempt to suicide bomb the white house.


----------



## Guardian G.I. (May 4, 2018)

Tensions between Russia and the West will eventually lead to a big conventional war in Eastern Europe, largely fought on the territory of Belarus and the Baltic states and utterly devastating for these countries (1995 Bosnia-tier in the best case scenario, 1945 Eastern Europe in the worst).


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 5, 2018)

Scientists will discover a portal where Hilary became president of the united states. With such news articles like this...

-Hilary has started a war with Russia; let's give her the Nobel Peace Prize.
-The Oscars go on for another 3 hours to make room for some celebrity bragging.


----------



## Deadwaste (May 5, 2018)

eric andre hosts the oscars; it's a massive success


----------



## Slap47 (May 5, 2018)

The US will experience a progressive movement that successfully passes sjw constitutional amendments instead of of deal with class inequality in a meaningful way. This will cause chaos and end decades later with the amendments getting repealed.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 5, 2018)

In utter desperation for new sales, Marvel comics hires Alex Jones to write Ms Marvel. You can guess how that turned out.


----------



## Steamboat_Bill (May 5, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> In utter desperation for new sales, Marvel comics hires Alex Jones to write Ms Marvel. You can guess how that turned out.



Ms. Marvel fights with Trump against the computer program that is trying to kill all humans?


----------



## ICametoLurk (May 5, 2018)

Apoth42 said:


> The US will experience a progressive movement that successfully passes sjw constitutional amendments instead of of deal with class inequality in a meaningful way. This will cause chaos and end decades later with the amendments getting repealed.


That already happened though.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eighteenth_Amendment_to_the_United_States_Constitution


----------



## Black Waltz (May 5, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> In utter desperation for new sales, Marvel comics hires Alex Jones to write Ms Marvel. You can guess how that turned out.


I would actually read that lol


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 6, 2018)

Dink Smallwood said:


> I would actually read that lol


Bonus points if they let him have full creative control.


----------



## Gym Leader Elesa (May 6, 2018)

Everyone on KF continues to swallow cum as their professions.


----------



## GarthMarenghisDankplace (May 6, 2018)

Things will continue on in a linear manner getting marginally worse in some respects and marginally better in others.


----------



## Curt Sibling (May 6, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> A cult start forming around Beyonce until she gets a cut on her face during one of her concerts. Realizing that she can bleed like a mere mortal, the cult goes berserk with no survivors.



And Michael Caine tells the story to Rudyard Kipling years later...!


----------



## MacMasonry (May 8, 2018)

I will achieve the human dream of being viscously beaten to death by every KF user with a puffer profile picture.


----------



## ToroidalBoat (May 8, 2018)

Society collapses into a renaissance festival IRL, and Kiwi Farms lives on as a mail correspondence program via carrier pigeon. Ratings are "scratch and sniff" stickers, and almost every "profile message" has a happy gator sticker on it.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 19, 2018)

Chris-Chan's trolls get the idea to convince her to audition on America's Got Talent, complete with money and a free ride to get there. The results are nothing more than legendary.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 27, 2018)

To appeal even more to the refugee/migrants, [insert European country's name here] bans walking dogs (including service dogs) in any area where a number of Muslims will be.


----------



## ES 148 (May 27, 2018)

Trump will die of cardiac arrest in August 2027.


----------



## Steamboat_Bill (May 27, 2018)

Vrakks said:


> Trump will die of cardiac arrest in August 2027.



Trump will _not_ die of cardiac arrest. History will repeat itself and he will go out the same way as some other famous person - perhaps Elvis or Catherine the Great.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 27, 2018)

Steamboat_Bill said:


> Trump will _not_ die of cardiac arrest. History will repeat itself and he will go out the same way as some other famous person - perhaps Elvis or Catherine the Great.


The horse thing with Catherine is only a myth.


----------



## JustStopDude (May 27, 2018)

Truck driving industry is going to be very disrupted by automation. Like international shipping and container usage, one big company will do it and then there will be very fast scramble to follow. 

I suspect in US it will be cross country shipping first. Local shipping will lag behind. Many truckers will lose jobs.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 27, 2018)

JustStopDude said:


> Truck driving industry is going to be very disrupted by automation. Like international shipping and container usage, one big company will do it and then there will be very fast scramble to follow.
> 
> I suspect in US it will be cross country shipping first. Local shipping will lag behind. Many truckers will lose jobs.


The thing is that computers don't have the adaptability and quick thinking that people have.


----------



## Deadwaste (May 27, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> The horse thing with Catherine is only a myth.


yeah, well that's what she gets for fucking horses in a time that it was unacceptable


----------



## DrJonesHat (May 27, 2018)

No one's doomsday predictions will come to pass and the human race will muddle through like it always has. Ray Kurzeweil will keel over from a heart attack, proving that God has a sick sense of humor.


----------



## JustStopDude (May 27, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> The thing is that computers don't have the adaptability and quick thinking that people have.


 I automate ports and steel mills as job. Same arguments today against trucking is same arguments in past in these industries.

Humans cannot react as fast as PLC and PLC is very simpler, stripped down computer. In Port facilities, we now use GPS to control carriers and cranes control remotely. 

A truck driver is biggest cost and liability. Even now, testing with automated vehicles have much lower accident rates.

It will be interesting the affect on insurance industry.


----------



## DrJonesHat (May 27, 2018)

The fear of nuclear war will be forever quieted when the nuclear powers discover the existence of Russell Greer. The world is united in its unbridled hatred of the man, and as a by-product, Taylor Swift is elected President in 2028.


----------



## Hell0 (May 27, 2018)

i have an idea, if the world ends.
the world will create fallout factions. because the games are so popular, that people will create them and join up.
eventually people will join them because they're large powers with lots of protection.
also i'm predict that tomorrow i will eat a slice of cold papa johns pizza


----------



## DrJonesHat (May 28, 2018)

Hell0 said:


> also i'm predict that tomorrow i will eat a slice of cold papa johns pizza


That's incredible! I did the same thing! And cheese sticks! This is eerie!


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 30, 2018)

The latest in feminist fashion: dying your leg hair.


----------



## Pvt. Shitpost (May 31, 2018)

The next big(somewhat) quake to hit california will happen late 2018 early 2019.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 31, 2018)

Trump will agree to a live debate with David Hogg where he will simply give the kid an atomic wedgie and leave.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jun 18, 2018)

I predict this will be a thing...

Boarder Parents: The illegal immigrants' version of stage/pageant moms where they raise children to act all sad and desperate to win support when they get caught.

Kid: Mami! Papi! 
Mom: Damn it, Pedro, put more feeling into it! And make sure to throw yourself at the chair while you're at it. (points to chair that has a sign on it that says, "boarder patrol")


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jul 14, 2018)

The women at Bikini Armor Battle Damage will take their disgust towards how fictional women should look by creating a cause called, Disrespect the Breast where they try to campaign against female characters whose breasts (even if they're covered) are higher than an a-cup. Fat chicks are exempt from this.


----------



## Dolphin Lundgren (Jul 14, 2018)

Cyborgs and technology will rebel and kill us all.


----------



## Cokeisbetterthenpepsi (Jul 14, 2018)

jesus will come from the sky and eat jeff bezos's pussy


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 1, 2018)

Expanding their musical limits, Steel Panther releases a Christmas album. (Hey, a girl can dream, can't she?)
The next awards show will consist of nothing but a bunch of celebs gathering together and screaming "fuck Trump" for three hours straight.


----------



## DrJonesHat (Sep 1, 2018)

The next time an attractive female celebrity is groped in public, she will turn around and break the attacker's nose with a perfectly executed palm strike. The #metoo movement will be replaced by the #tryitasshole movement.


----------



## Hellbound Hellhound (Sep 8, 2018)

Within a month of Donald Trump leaving office, Twitter will ban him from their platform.


----------



## An Sionnach Seang (Sep 8, 2018)

the #metoo movement will be used to deliberately sabotage a major election, most likely in California or Canada, by forcing the opposition candidate(s) out of a job

then when the world sees what an effective tactic it is, elections all over the western world become complete and utter clusterfucks where every single candidate tries to win just by accusing their opponent(s) of sexual misconduct

following the acceptance of post-normal science (fudging the evidence to fit the desired result) as academically legitimate, post-normal justice (kangaroo courts) and post-normal democracy (election rigging) will be accepted as legitimate too


----------



## ASU (Sep 9, 2018)

When you die it will not be terribly painful, but it will be uncomfortable. You will experience yourself "waking up" repeatedly as you swirl in and out of consciousness and gasp for your final breaths. When this happens, relax: it is time to accept and let go.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 11, 2018)

Next versions of history books will include details on how Wakanda ended WW1 and WW2 by defeating the evil nazis (yes, nazis in both wars).


----------



## Guts Gets Some (Nov 11, 2018)

I predict that just when we think it's all over, more never-ending stupid shit will invariably happen instead. Rinse, repeat.

I should get my own psychic TV show now, please.


----------



## Steamboat_Bill (Nov 11, 2018)

Guts Gets Some said:


> I predict that just when we think it's all over, more never-ending stupid shit will invariably happen instead. Rinse, repeat.
> 
> I should get my own psychic TV show now, please.



I'll do you one better.

_It *will* get worse from here, and it will keep getting worse unless something is done about it.
_
There. Remember, future events such as these will affect you in the future.


----------



## DrJonesHat (Nov 11, 2018)

Cyberpunk 2077 won't get released until it's actually 2077.


----------



## Deadwaste (Nov 13, 2018)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> It will be revealed that Funny Valentine had recently found his earthly counterpart, Donald Trump, had him run for president and is now enjoying his cushy presidential job.





NotAKitty said:


> View attachment 195584


it's only after i read the manga that i realized the joke here


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jan 4, 2020)

Donald Trump will come out in 2023 and say he’s a woman, thus becoming the first female president.


----------



## Cedric_Eff (Jan 4, 2020)

Josh is gonna return to Ukraine.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Feb 24, 2020)

Insane transgender parents will now claim that their unborn ones are already trans, putting them through hormone therapy in the womb. And if the kid has dyphoria when they're  older, they can double trans them.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Feb 28, 2020)

Half the population of California has died overnight, suffocating themselves so as not to breathe air that could instead be breathed by someone with a minority status.


----------



## spurger king (Feb 28, 2020)

In ~10 years everyone's phone will be a set of AR goggles


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Mar 19, 2020)

Breaking News: Democrats push for open borders promising protection, rights and benefits for all foreign viruses. Accuse Trump of virus racism.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 26, 2020)

Body odor will become the newest trend for SJW artists so be prepared for characters who look liked they probably smell, have stink lines, turd-stained undies, etc. Take that patriarchy and your cleanliness standards.


----------



## FluffyTehFennekin (May 31, 2020)

The next country to drink the Kool-aid, would probably be Japan. So expect some WOKE anime in the near future.


----------



## Syaoran Li (May 31, 2020)

FluffyTehFennekin said:


> The next country to drink the Kool-aid, would probably be Japan. So expect some WOKE anime in the near future.



Eh, I doubt Japan will be the next one in line. If anything, it's going to be South Korea first and then Japan will probably be one of the last countries to go woke, if it does get to that point.

Woke culture is starting to decline in the West and a backlash is growing, at least in the United States, and these riots and pandemics are only hastening its demise. 

Sort of like how a tiger is at its most fiercely violent when it knows it's facing its own death.

My prediction is that woke culture will reach its absolute nadir in 2020 but will die in 2021-2022 *if *Trump wins the 2020 election since the media and Big Tech will be forced to realize that all of their efforts were in vain, and that they cannot alienate the masses any further. 

That's why they are pulling every dirty trick in the book so far and will keep doing so as we get closer to the election.

Especially now that Corona has wrecked everyone's finances, and the companies can't afford to take as many hits as more woke media keeps flopping, so if Trump wins, they'll see no value in a woke media since it's not profitable nor effective as propaganda.

Another bold prediction on my part, but Twitter is going to suffer a major loss in the 2020's that may or may not doom it. I don't think it will happen this year, but it could happen later on in the decade.

Best case scenario, they end up like Tumblr where they're still around but are a crippled shadow of their former glory.

Worst case scenario, they end up suffering the same fate as MySpace.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jun 27, 2020)

Believing they suffer from too much "white privilege", east Asian art becomes the next target starting with I.M. Pei's buildings being vandalized.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jul 4, 2020)

Breaking news: “Protesters grab power lines and they get electrocuted. Protesters are now suing local utilities provider for being racists.”


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## Meat Target (Jul 4, 2020)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> Breaking news: “Protesters grab power lines and they get electrocuted. Protesters are now suing local utilities provider for being racists.”


A part of me hopes they'll start saying "electricity is racist".


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## Quantum Diabetes (Jul 4, 2020)

Mixer has become such an abandoned place they'll pull the plug in the next week.

The twitch scandals are going to pile up and Daddy Warbucks Bezos will say "fuck it" and that shit is gone by September.



Holiday Spice Pepsi _will_ be back this year.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Sep 28, 2020)

Discovering that George Strait exists, SJWs start demanding that he change his last name because it excludes gays, bisexuals and the rest of the alphabet soup community.


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## Syaoran Li (Sep 28, 2020)

Letthepowerofgoutcompelyo said:


> Holiday Spice Pepsi _will_ be back this year.



Supposedly they've brought back the Mountain Dew Ultra-Violet flavor that was around for like a month back in 2009, so I wouldn't put it past them to bring back Holiday Spice Pepsi or Mountain Dew Revolution or something. For fuck's sake. Crystal Pepsi came back for a while in the 2010's as like an annual summer thing. 

Bolder prediction: Coca-Cola will bring back New Coke as a limited time flavor


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Feb 27, 2021)

Society's infantilization of black people (and to a lesser extent, Latinos) goes to the point of wearing diapers as the newest in street/ghetto fashion. All diaper rash will be blamed on whitey.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Mar 3, 2021)

To maintain her raunchy image, Cardi B's newest song will be called, "Mmmmph, Mmmmph" which involves her rapping while performing fellatio.


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## Deadwaste (Mar 3, 2021)

Yaoi Huntress Earth said:


> To maintain her raunchy image, Cardi B's newest song will be called, "Mmmmph, Mmmmph" which involves her rapping while performing fellatio.


honestly wouldnt surprise me


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## Łimønča (Mar 3, 2021)

Biden will have a stroke while eating ice cream within the next four years, becoming the American equivalent of Brezhnev.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Mar 5, 2021)

BLM discovers the best way to make sure their goals are met is to start demanding that crime should be made legal.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Apr 24, 2021)

BLM will start protesting/rioting at Catholic churches until George Floyd is canonized as a saint.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 11, 2021)

To appeal to the Libertarian and an-cap markets, sex toy manufacturers will release a line of Ayn Rand blow-up dolls.


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## lurk_moar (May 12, 2021)

In the far future, you do not have actually to go shopping because Amazon based on your thoughts would ship you the perfect product every time.

Since millennials and zoomers are doomed to be forever alone, there will be implants that will send a message to your chosen funeral home when your heart stops beating.


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## Helvítis Túristi (May 12, 2021)

I predict the Ukrainians will be forced to suffer another famine, just as there was 200 and 100 years ago. There will be much hand rubbing as always.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Jul 20, 2021)

Scientist warn that within 6 months, Humanity will run out of things to call racist.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Apr 22, 2022)

-Critical Race Theorists will try to introduce kids with the Nation of Islam's creation myths as a way to create even more racial division--I mean, "healing".


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 20, 2022)

Now that child beauty pageants are a thing of the past, attention-whoring moms need something to do with their daughters. (Since drag kings don't get half the attention their female counterparts get, the drag kids option is out.) Thus, "Slut Moms" are created where preteen and young teen girls are encouraged to be the biggest and proudest sluts possible.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Oct 31, 2022)

-Just Stop Oil will have a short-lived American branch who will make the mistake of spraying the rides of a gang of Hell's Angels where their gluing to the ground leaves them perfect targets to get their asses kicked.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Nov 7, 2022)

-Dylan Mulvaney will not get bottom surgery like she claims she wants to, but will opt to normalize the bulge even further by proudly displaying her erections on her TikTok and in public. 
-I will come to the sad conclusion that Tupac Shakur, the Big Bopper, and Kurt Cobain didn't live to see 30 and Dylan will.


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## Wesker (Nov 7, 2022)

The shortages we're facing this winter will make the shit during Covid look like nothing.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 23, 2022)

In 3 years, business and homes will have "no whites allowed" signs as a way to promote "racial healing".


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Monday at 8:26 PM)

Believing that the Amish aren't doing enough for their movement, the environmentalists will claim that horse farts pollute the atmosphere.


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## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Wednesday at 6:53 PM)

The first openly homosexual President of the United States will fall from grace when his many affairs with women are discovered.


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