# Honest poll: Who here actually wants to see which of the following to Ralph?



## ANiggaNamedElmo (May 24, 2022)

Considering his leaving to Portugal so swiftly, it does make one wonder. The question is, what do you think? I am noticing a lot of negative and positive comments both, but I want to know what the damn slanderous Fan Fiction Farms thinks.


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## TV's Adam West (May 24, 2022)

I want Ralph raped and killed behind an Arby's.


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## felted (May 24, 2022)

A longer time back in jail is the only hope for Ralph to learn some humility and shame. Other than that, he's pretty much fucked his own life up to such a monumental level that I don't see him ever crawling out of without some massive, unlikely character changes. I believe that the ralph saga isn't going to end very well for ralph.


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## PortugalTourismBoard (May 24, 2022)

I unironically want Ralph to win. I want him to swallow his pride, go dark for a few years, work on himself, develop humility, apologize privately to those he has wronged, attend Church.... but until then; I'll enjoy the clown show


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## An automatic clown (May 24, 2022)

Wow this is weird to think about, I have never given it any thoughts as to what _I _would like for Ralph. On one hand the complete trashfire that is his life is hilariously entertaining, helps me pass time at work and I enjoy listening to Josh lament about having to talk about Gunt every week. On the other hand, the trashfire that is his life is deeply disturbing and you'd hope if you knew someone Irl like this you'd try to help them get their shit together and become a human bean again.
Idk ralphabros I don't feel so well


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## The Littlest Shitlord (May 24, 2022)

I'd like to see him get help for his drug and alcohol abuse because he won't survive going sober on his own and there's no way he can turn things around until that happens. But of course he won't even want to quit until the absolute worst happens. So I'm hoping that he has a near-death experience and gets to meets Chris T. Christ in person. Actually, he's one of those people who will probably get to experience literal Hell for a little while until he calls out for Christ to save him. _Then_ he'll get to hear a few things he's been avoiding from someone who he might actually listen to.


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## L. Duse (May 24, 2022)

It was around the Faith saga when I thought that Ralph needed to go to jail.

Not necessarily because jail is what Ralph for some reason fears a lot, as if being stuck in an awful neighbourhood in a shack that stinks of faeces, having a child that you don't really care for, being laughed and harassed on the Internet, having plenty of addictions and health problems, having no real job and having to beg for money online aren't things that anyone with a sense of self respect fears.

Jail is something that forces Ralph to stop going on this spiral of self-destruction. You can't surf the Internet and start fights in jail. You are forced to sit down and rethink the things you have done wrong. You can't engage in your vices like gambling, drinking and whoring while in jail. And his loyal followers will still pay him anyway.

The last time he went to jail, he came out thinner and happier. It is all for his own good and yet for some reason I can't phantom, he fears jail immensely even more than being in a dead end in his life. Something must have happened in there.


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## ░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓ด้้้้้็็็็็้้ (May 24, 2022)

PortugalTourismBoard said:


> I unironically want Ralph to win. I want him to swallow his pride, go dark for a few years, work on himself, develop humility, apologize privately to those he has wronged, attend Church.... but until then; I'll enjoy the clown show



Okay, but what about everything else? Consider the following:

His unpaid student loan debt
His credit card debts
Not owning his house
His high-interest auto loan
The back child support he will owe for his bastard son
His felony record
A lack of education, since he never graduated
His non-existent work experience
His lack of marketable skills
His sordid past making it difficult for him to collaborate with other content creators
The myriad of health problems he suffers from


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## Takodachi (May 24, 2022)

TV's Adam West said:


> I want Ralph raped and killed behind an Arby's.


wheres the fun in that


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## Fascist Frederick (May 24, 2022)

Takodachi said:


> wheres the fun in that


In the rapist's penis.


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## The Skeptical Tomato X5 (May 24, 2022)

I want him to keep on winning, getting W after W. Nothing can keep the Ralphamale down.


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## Edilg (May 24, 2022)

I want him to be his Ralphamale self. Entertaining us and destroying his whole life around him.


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## Opiophile (May 24, 2022)

I want Ralph to get to be Hamber or Chantal sized within a few years, and still be hollerin' on his show to 50 people. Still wearing sunglasses to hide is hilarious disfigurement.


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## Knojkamarangasan_#4 (May 24, 2022)

Unironically heart attack while leave on stream in the middle of a ragePig hollerin' moment. Would be absolutely hilarious.


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## Yellow Yam Scam (May 24, 2022)

Dead is fine. This whole idea of "if he's dead or in jail there's no more content" is consoomer bullshit. TV shows don't need to last forever and lolcows shouldn't either. Good stories have beginnings, middles and ends and don't overstay their welcome. Ralph dying in abject misery right about today would be a perfect ending and then I could go watch some other, fresher lolcow (Who would also hopefully die somewhat quickly and in hilarious fashion.)


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## 3322 (May 24, 2022)

For our amusement I want him to stay exactly the way he is now. For his own personal growth going back to jail would probably benefit him the most because he would never be able to quit drugs and drinking without a controlled environment like that. When Ralph got out of jail the last time he was healthier than he has ever been in his entire life. I don't think anything could ever change him permanently. He will just die one day due to his failing health or an overdose and his legacy will be this subforum.


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## Insanely Retarded (May 24, 2022)

Ralph is irredeemable at this point, there's no "happy ending" possible for a person who hates himself and everyone else as much as he does. He is a detriment to society and to everyone he comes in contact with and he's never going to change unless the choices are taken from him by going to jail, and even then, he'll go right back to being Ralph after coming out. 

If we're being honest the most likely outcome will either be he ends up ODing alone at some point or kills an entire family while drunk driving/reading KF on his phone while driving (drunk) or in jail at some point, it might take 5 years or 10 but it seems unavoidable. 

Out of the options in the poll the "drunk, unwell..." one seems to be the most fitting, I doubt Ralph will go out with a bang, he'll just continue streaming for the 10 people who support him and the alogs who throw pennies at him, he'll keep going no matter how unwell he is, until the day he physically can't do it anymore.


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## TheGuntinator (May 24, 2022)

The best outcome for Ralph?  Rehab, followed by finding something resembling a job. Not quite making lolcow superchats at that stage, but he has pretty much ridden his fame into the ground. 

Best case for the audience? He shows up to the fight, wins, then picks a fight with another street punk in a foreign country and gets the shit kicked out of him again  now that a ref isnt there to save him.


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## AltisticRight (May 24, 2022)

Ralph will have a prosperous spergy life for us to enjoy, then the subforum will be inherited by ReRollRozy and Xander.


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## Bloitzhole (May 24, 2022)

I want him to get all the help he needs to stay alive for as long as possible - because the core of all his issues is not medically relevant. It's his abrasive behavior that gets him into the trouble we derive our laughs from - and the alcohol only mildly exasperbates these behaviors.

You can work on addiction and fix a foot, but there's no cure for being the fucking gunt.


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## Johnny Salami (May 24, 2022)

I want ralph to be a success story of my 600lb life


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## ANiggaNamedElmo (May 24, 2022)

Yellow Yam Scam said:


> Dead is fine. This whole idea of "if he's dead or in jail there's no more content" is consoomer bullshit. TV shows don't need to last forever and lolcows shouldn't either. Good stories have beginnings, middles and ends and don't overstay their welcome. Ralph dying in abject misery right about today would be a perfect ending and then I could go watch some other, fresher lolcow (Who would also hopefully die somewhat quickly and in hilarious fashion.)


I would agree with you but that doesn't leave out all of the fucking shitstains surrounding him who also deserve due diligence.


Bloitzhole said:


> I want him to get all the help he needs to stay alive for as long as possible - because the core of all his issues is not medically relevant. It's his abrasive behavior that gets him into the trouble we derive our laughs from - and the alcohol only mildly exasperbates these behaviors.
> 
> You can work on addiction and fix a foot, but there's no cure for being the fucking gunt.


Mildly? Have you ever met any full blown alcoholics? The kind who will lie, cheat, steal money from you, hide their addiction in all kinds of ways, miss appointments, forget holidays, fucking even drive you to the airport or hospital?

Alcohol recovery doesn't stop when someone becomes sober. It takes a lot of extra work to make sure someone doesn't relapse which is why I fucking constantly say that Naltrexone works for alcoholics if you're too stubborn for Acomprosate. Either take a single injection in the ass that makes you want to not want to drink or take a pill that costs pennies that does the same thing so long as you make a fucking conviction to take it so you don't relapse.

At some point you lose one too many friends to something preventable.

*RALPH, WE ALL LOVE YOU. WE ARE YOUR FANS. WE WANT TO SEE YOU SUCCEED IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY. YOU ARE THE CHAMPION THE OTHER INCELS COULD NEVER BE!*


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## Blue Miaplacidus (May 24, 2022)

I think he's a garbage person who has no redemption. Can rate me top hats or whatever, but fuck ralph.


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## Tiger Jack (May 24, 2022)

Dude seriously needs to go to rehab and some form of anger management/therapy. If he has to go to jail first for that to happen then so be it.
Everything that has gone wrong in Ralph’s life for the last couple years has been a direct result of his inability to control his addictions and his very serious rage issues. Nothing, and I mean *nothing* is going to improve in his life until he makes those changes.

If Ralph really wants to own the ay-logs then he should get the help he very clearly needs. We would have nothing to laugh at if he stopped being the version of himself that implodes every other week.


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## Monkey Type-I.N.G (May 24, 2022)

I do not understand many of the responses here, Ralph is literally making today's Internet fun, him ascended to Chris like lolcow status has reinvigorated online entertainment for me, from what I thought was once a dead sektur to a man's never ending yelling rage in a crusade to own people that don't care. I am Ralph's biggest fan and I want this ride going as long as it goes, so I want nothing but perceived victories for him.


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## Chocolate Wombat (May 24, 2022)

I only follow the Gunt Saga for its inevitable conclusion of him crashing and burning. So thinking of ways to prevent the crash and burn seems counterintuitive to me.


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## Juan But Not Forgotten (May 24, 2022)

I want universe to let him win a couple of times, so he would think that he deserved it and let loose again. Or him taking the L, starting things slow, gaining some good will back and fucking it all up again. I can't see him getting better, since the only time when this actually happened was when he got jailtime. If he gets charged again with a felony, he is gone for good.


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## White Pride Worldwide (May 24, 2022)

I just want him to stay in the public eye and keep doing stupid shit so I can laugh at it for my own entertainment.


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## zyclonPD (May 24, 2022)

I think the best thing for Ralph is to get off the Internet and work one of the blue collar jobs that hire felons. He would be a lot happier if he did. https://helpforfelons.org/jobs-for-felons-in-virginia/

My personal opinion use to be that he should do that. NOW I think he should continue to struggle and suffer under his own stupidity and incompetence, bragging about the peanuts he dances and begs for on live streams to 100 losers.


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## Shig O'nella (May 24, 2022)

Part of me would like him to man up and face his fears. The rest would prefer him to explode (literally).


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## MadStan (May 24, 2022)

Ralph unlike some other LOLCOWs I believe is capable of reaching point of _exceptional violence_. I honestly believe that. And given there is a child and others around him unable to defend themselves against a lunatic, I want him in Jail.

He is entirely capable of killing a family on the road while streaming or texting while he is high or drunk. 

Jail. That _is _where he belongs.


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## Capt. Jean Luc Ritard (May 24, 2022)

I want him to yell at more women


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## The-Patriarchy (May 24, 2022)

The only happy ending possible for Ralph is the one he buys at an asian massage parlor if he can somehow manage to not insult anyone long enough to pay for it.


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## GuntPunt (May 24, 2022)

Unfortunately, what I want for Ralph and what will happen will be two very different things.

What I want is more Ralphamale antics, and his kids growing up ok. Sady, those are mutually exclusive and unlikely outcomes.

What we're probably going to get is more Ralphamale antics, followed either by jail or sad health decline into death, and his kids (especially Rozy) taking the mantle.

I'm enjoying the ride now, before it gets even more bumpy.


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## Moist Unguentine (May 24, 2022)

I would like to see Ralph continue spiraling with increasingly erratic behavior while he tries to save his failing internet career. What I think will happen is that Ralph will fuck up so badly that he ends up in jail. I think Daddy Jim is right about his head trauma based on his sperging out and doing crazy shit like passing trucks on the shoulder of I-95, the bowling wedding disaster, and suddenly returning to Portugal for some as yet unknown reason.

The possibilities are endless due to his drug and alcohol abuse while inviting every retard on the internet to come fuck with him. Scoring weed is one thing but getting coke, meth and pills has a higher risk factor due to the kind of people you expose yourself to obtaining it. Livestreaming your road rage might seem like YOLO but if you get caught in the act you're fucked. One of those truckers he passed has dashcam footage of Ralph and tried submitting it to a popular YouTube trucker channel with 154K subs. It wasn't posted on their 4-Wheeler Friday segment for legal reasons but it was passed on to South Carolina Highway Patrol. Based on Ralph's terrible driving history, he could end up in jail for another vehicle mishap where drugs and alcohol are involved.


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## Wine em Dine em 69 em (May 24, 2022)

In the real world?  Prison. He needs to be physically locked up, away from women, children, drugs, alcohol, vehicles, money,, etc. 
there’s no saving whatever’s left of his mush brain.  He can’t do it, there’s nobody who will help him do it, so the taxpayers will have to do it for him. 
Sorry, it’s not funny or entertaining but it’s the best case scenario, and pray he doesn’t hurt or kill other people before he’s stopped. 
But till then let’s enjoy the show.


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## Barbarus (May 24, 2022)

Dead. He's a nigger obviously.


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## Braphamut (May 24, 2022)

L. Duse said:


> It was around the Faith saga when I thought that Ralph needed to go to jail.
> 
> Not necessarily because jail is what Ralph for some reason fears a lot, as if being stuck in an awful neighbourhood in a shack that stinks of faeces, having a child that you don't really care for, being laughed and harassed on the Internet, having plenty of addictions and health problems, having no real job and having to beg for money online aren't things that anyone with a sense of self respect fears.
> 
> ...



It is possible, but I suspect it wasn't anything particularly dramatic, it was just for once in his life he was contained and accountable for his behavior.  No mommy to pay for his living expenses while he purchased drugs, having to engage in routine, placating others so you aren't a vulnerable outcast.  Basically put the rage demon in a box like That South Park Episode with the dog whisperer (also with black vomit).






Death and abandon is the 'easy' way out for Ralph and we know that.  The "I'd rather die" shit he constantly harps on is the cope.  Working on his fucked up life is far more virtuous and masculine than surrounding himself with vices he thinks 'makes a man'.  Ronnie never taught him that.  Never had a daddy and Mom allowed him to become her big titty baby bitch well into his 30s.  

Rage Demon is in control.  Rage Demon doesn't want to lose control.  Prison is the muzzle and a mirror.


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## Don Yagon (May 24, 2022)

In either case DSP would outlive another one.


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## Expendable Zaku (May 24, 2022)

I’m gunning for the redemption angle, i.e. seeking treatment for his substance abuse and related problems. This is, of course, the second least likely outcome in my opinion.


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## Chiridion (May 24, 2022)

I want a kino ending: Meigh leaves with Reroll, tax man up his ass, child support up his ass, living in a ghetto mocked constantly by the natives, slowly sinking deeper into poverty and alcoholism until one day he's out doing a shitty IRL stream when... It's Lord Akira (or other OG enemy) with a Saturday Night Special, and Ralph takes 5 rounds of hot lead to the gunt and dies in the ambulance.


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## SilkyJohnson (May 24, 2022)

I'd actually be down for him kicking his worst habits, training hard for the fight and go down swinging to Andy. It would not only help his physical health but also mentally too. 

He could shake hands with Warski, shut down his livestreams, get a blue collar job and provide for his family for the remainder of his life. 

It'll never happen due to him being a restaurant quality retard, but it would be the best end to the ralph saga I could see transpiring.


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## Apochrypha (May 24, 2022)

I want to see Ralph grow old and have his children resent him for the rest of his natural born life. But I guess that will only happen if his kids become functioning members of society, and we all know that's next to impossible.


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## GHTD (May 24, 2022)

I only want the fucking worst for that fat manlet faggot. Stupid nigger.


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## WhimsicalTrolli (May 24, 2022)

Him acknowledging my parodies.


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## Mr. Manchester (May 24, 2022)

A year ago I would have said that I would have wanted Ralph to get his shit together for his kids.  Now I think he's of more use to them as a miserable pathetic drunk.  Ronnie was just a lazy bum that was never there so Ralph only has a couple of fond puppy-gassing memories of him.  Ralph's retardation is recorded forever, etched in stone and remembered by people that laugh at him.  Maybe with a bit of luck Xander and Rozy will see all of that shit and it will scare them so much that they will do everything they can to not be him.

So suck down another bottle of Makers and follow it up with some nose candy, Ralph!  Might just be the best thing you do for either of your kids.


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## Smarty Pants (May 24, 2022)

I unironically want Ralph to become the most famous person on the internet.


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## Obscura539 (May 24, 2022)

I want Ralph to get his shit together and support his children.  They are the only victims in this entire debacle and he owes them an attempt at normalcy.  However, I think the shit-apple doesn't fall far from the shit-tree.  He will most likely become like his father.  A raging alcoholic who can't even take care of his own family.  Maybe that Sisco guy can help with raising Rozy in between horse romping sessions.  Xander should fare a bit better off as it seems like the support is there.


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## Easterling (May 24, 2022)

I want to see just how low he can go honestly, how far he can spiral? man is like the worlds fattest roach, he's at least of par with DSP just with far more unpleasnt personality. What is the limit to ralphs degeneracy? Will his paypigs dry up or will ethan wise up and go the Ghost radio way of the grift and embrace people paying money to fuck with him?


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## break these cuffs (May 24, 2022)

I'd like to see him continue careening from one catastrophe to the next, getting enough wins to keep him going and his ayylawgs seething. Ralph will cope seethe, and sperg at virtually anything. Him getting enough wins to keep going causes all the fags who orbit him to cope, seethe, and sperg. It's in the interest of true schadenfreude enjoyers for him to get wins and losses to create the maximum amount of entertainment. Hopefully he can continue building and burning bridges with the bottom feeders who are willing to interact with him.


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## Fetish Roulette (May 24, 2022)

Whatever Ralph does is going to be funnier than anything I could think of- I'm just along for the ride.


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## Peanut Butter in Peril (May 24, 2022)

I want it to go like this.

He finally manages to encounter Null physically in a public location. He starts hollerin' up a storm, causing a public disturbance, and attracting a crowd of onloookers. His rage pig rant has gotta be the most vile and slanderous things you can say. I'm talking mothers covering their children's ears, those without wear withal to faint, and any one else stunned and aghast with horror at the abhorrent language pouring out of his piggy mouth. This commotion of course has attracted the attention of the police. They arrest him but before he's shoved into the cruiser he squeals one last nauseatingly disgusting insult before collapsing into a gunted heap due to his heart exploding.​


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## AncientPhosphur (May 24, 2022)

Right when I get bored of Ralph and I’m getting to the point where I’ll stop following his antics entirely:

Ralph goes on stream, he slurs his words more than usual, his face starts drooping… next thing you know he eyes roll back into his head and he hits the keyboard… and then… you hear him give one final shart to end all sharts. As he dies only the alogs notice and call the police for a wellness check up but don’t do it because they think it’s a joke.


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## JustStopDude (May 24, 2022)

A sober Ralph is someone less likely to hurt or kill someone innocent on the road. 

Only reason I want him to get healthy.


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## MeltyTW (May 24, 2022)

id prefer if hes just kinda ok but humiliated just enough for a thin skinned fag like him to sperg out, like not on his knees as some thug makes him fellate a gun or see his baby skinned or anything horrific but just idk he has to constantly deal with being called piggy or gunt irl streams inbetween living an ok life. something we can meme as being total shit, and is annoying af, but doesnt really hamper his life all that much.

or he cleans up and lives a great life offstream but kayfabe stays a gunted menace we can laugh at


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## Cup Noodle (May 25, 2022)

I chose write in and here is my write in.  I want everything for him besides getting help.  He wants help less than I want him to get help so why should I care?  I just want the content.  He has already had a heart attack and I'm pretty sure when he had that one sperg out session against Venti he had a mini stroke. 



Looks like lack of oxygen to the brain to me, but I'm no expert.


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## Catspajamas7 (May 25, 2022)

Cup Noodle said:


> I chose write in and here is my write in.  I want everything for him besides getting help.  He wants help less than I want him to get help so why should I care?  I just want the content.  He has already had a heart attack and I'm pretty sure when he had that one sperg out session against Venti he had a mini stroke.
> 
> 
> 
> Looks like lack of oxygen to the brain to me, but I'm no expert.




He looks like he’s doing a real good coppercab or realizing his heart just palpitated and is scared he’s about to Keel over


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## Arthur Morgan (May 25, 2022)

My write in is I want him to get his ass kicked and that to lead him to turn things around. Eventually the joke wears thin and the redemption arc is more interesting. Have the downfall end with one big bang, rather than a steady droop.


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## part timer (May 25, 2022)

I want to see him escape to Mexico and join some sort of gang and basically doing IP2 Mexican cartel edition


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## ANiggaNamedElmo (May 25, 2022)

Arthur Morgan said:


> My write in is I want him to get his ass kicked and that to lead him to turn things around. Eventually the joke wears thin and the redemption arc is more interesting. Have the downfall end with one big bang, rather than a steady droop.


People have been saying this for years, sadly. Or as Ralph says "IT IS WHAT IT IS".  Sometimes you just have no other option but to take a break.


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## Popper Whiting (May 25, 2022)

TV's Adam West said:


> I want Ralph raped and killed behind an Arby's.


#Justice4Rachel

And I'll holler til I get it


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## BrainProlapse (May 25, 2022)

I don't want him to die, but his piggy heart giving out is the best possible result for everyone else.

His kids would be better off without his dead weight and everyone in America would be safer without this retard drunk-driving every day.


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## thismanlies (May 25, 2022)

It's not that we want to see bad shit happen to Ralph. He just brings it all on himself so we can't help but laugh.


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## Spergetti (May 25, 2022)

It really seems like the only outcomes we can reasonably expect for Ethan is a sudden death or continued self-destructive spiraling. Jail is the closest thing Ralph could have to a "reset" on his life. He would be forced to get away from the internet drama, stop drinking and taking drugs, and hopefully get enough clarity to start fixing some of his personal issues. However, I think Ralph would just sunset himself if he really thought he was going to jail again, and I don't say that with any glee. He talks a big game about how he wouldn't mind going back to jail, but realistically he likely can't stand the thought of having to stop all of his addictions cold turkey. Hell, the withdrawal symptoms alone might kill him anyway. Regardless of what happens next, it all ends in tragedy for Ethan and those around him, it's just a question of how much further harm is he going to do to Meigh and his children.


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## Keranu (May 25, 2022)

Here is what I've always said about Ethan Ralph. If he were to ever attempt an honest redemption arc, he would gain my sympathies.

It's something I can't help, I always lean toward the underdog, the unpopular, the unfashionable. Jarbo, Deadman, JMK (before it was cool), even fucking Kyler, they're all lovable losers to me.

Ralph has never taken accountability for his actions, never apologizes, genuinely wants e-friends to die and sees nothing immoral about it. Ralph is a wigger that doubles down on all these things to not seem like a bitch.

I don't want him dead or in jail for more than a few months, but until he says "sorry I'm a corn-filled bitch," I can't really want good for him neither.


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## The First Fag (May 25, 2022)

I am personally conflicted on how to feel about what I necessarily want to see from Ralph.

On the one hand, I don't like seeing people unhappy and Ralph is a very unhappy person. His credit is shit, his financial situation is shit, he has no job prospects, all that sappy shit. It's hard not to feel bad for them. I don't want to see people hurt and miserable because that can happen to you. You could get mugged in the street, you could be milked for all of your money by BPD whores (child support, attorney fees, all that). It is a shit hand to have.

On the other hand, Ralph is a complete piece of shit. He left his mom basically to die, he may or may not have killed a puppy, he released revenge porn on someone and effectively ruined any relationship or job prospects she might have had (assuming her behavior hasn't already), he has victimized so many people, most of whom either looked up to them up to including women who loved him genuinely. It's hard not to say "fuck this guy".

My thing is this: I am someone who wants to see people happy and healthy and Ralph is neither of those two. Understatement of the century I know. Ralph is at a point where he is on a downward spiral where he is just fucking up both his life and the lives of those close to them. It is painfully obvious that he needs help. It is also apparent that he needs punishment for his actions and punishments that stick.

So I guess what I want is this: Ralph to be punished as he deserves for what he does and has done under the court of law and if he survives, he get help and try to improve his situation. Maybe try and be a good father, make amends with the people he has pissed off over the years and make peace with the god of gods of his choosing.

But we don't always get what we want so I guess I have to settle for him getting the shit punched out of him in Portugal by fucking Anglos.


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## genericwhitemale (May 25, 2022)

I don't want anything to happen to Ralph.  I don't think there should be any intervening on his life good or bad.  I kind of just want to observe him from a distance and watch the trashfires he creates.  Basically, I just want things to stay the way they are now.


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## Zilortha (May 25, 2022)

I don't hate Ralph. I used to really enjoy his show. I rooted for him.
But he's just went so far off the rails. He needs legit medical/psychological help, but he won't get it.
I'd like to see Ralph get clean and turn his life around. But I don't think that'll happen. 

He's too far gone.


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## Telemeter (May 25, 2022)

I want for either the Harvest to continue or for him to get some help and leave the internet.

Hell, I'll settle for him to just turn a Sargon and lose the weight and become bland and boring, but noticeably heather and happier.


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## Grand Wizard Wakka (May 25, 2022)

Telemeter said:


> Hell, I'll settle for him to just turn a Sargon and lose the weight and become bland and boring, but noticeably heather and happier.


I want Sargon to cow it up again, if anything.


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## ANiggaNamedElmo (May 26, 2022)

Okay, this topic/thread went magnificently. Poll is finished. Gunt had his ass kicked again in Lisbon. There's no cherry on top of this (OR?) but anyway mods, go ahead and close this one at your discretion.


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## Gaunt King Ithan Rilph (May 26, 2022)

Drunk, throwing up black shit, unwell, wants as little time as possible with his children.​
This, but I want him to keep up the pretense of winning and only having 5-star days. I don't want him unwell enough that he stops giving us content.
So basically where we're at right now, but further amped up.


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## Kung Pow Cream (May 27, 2022)

I want him to stagnate and stay the same but with occasions that something snaps in him and makes him want to be better. I want him to try to get better for a few days or so and then something triggers him back into a hollering hog. I like the idea of seeing a man understand his shitty place in life but being unable to succeed or be better because it's ultimately down to him to make the decision and he makes the wrong decision every time because it's his nature.

This is the reason why I'm fascinated with Nick Fuentes and other cows because it's just fascinating watching people scream and flail in their own shit but never having the mental facilities to actually stand up.


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## Freeman (May 27, 2022)

I just want to see him get hogtied and poked in the Gunt with a stick, not too much to ask really.


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## ItCouldBeWorse (May 27, 2022)

Yellow Yam Scam said:


> Dead is fine. This whole idea of "if he's dead or in jail there's no more content" is consoomer bullshit. TV shows don't need to last forever and lolcows shouldn't either. Good stories have beginnings, middles and ends and don't overstay their welcome. Ralph dying in abject misery right about today would be a perfect ending and then I could go watch some other, fresher lolcow (Who would also hopefully die somewhat quickly and in hilarious fashion.)


This. Just like any show, a lolcow gets stale after it goes on for too long. Best example is probably Chris. 

In a way I'd compare Chris to the Simpsons, both were pioneers in their respective fields, for the Simpsons it was adult cartoons, for Chris it was being a proper internet laughing stock. Both had their golden days of prime time entertainment, but as time went on alternative options showed up. Simpsons were suddenly in competition with Family Guy and South Park, Chris is suddenly up against Ralph. However let's be real, both Chris and Simpsons were eventually milked for what they were worth. Did anything of worth _really_ happen between the idea guy stuff and him fucking Barb? The only people left watching the Simpsons or following Chris are the super fans who can't let go and happily put up with mediocre output or people who are just getting into adult animation/lolcows as a whole (Baby's first adult show/lolcow).

All lolcows will run dry one day and so will Ralph. He's in his age of the golden output, if he doesn't quit or die soon it's just gonna be a slow painful death similar to Chris with something major happening every few years.


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