# 2023 Prediction Thread - Locks Jan 1st



## Pit Viper Salesman (Dec 20, 2022)

2022 was a relatively wild ride for this sector right out of the gate! From beatings in the streets of Portugal, the rise and fall of many lolcows, channels, alogs, the return of old faces and the emergence of bold new actors this year has had an incredible number of unsuspected plot twists as well as heavily anticipated moments. 

After speaking with @AltisticRight, we agreed it could be fun if I made a thread for everyone to list their predictions for the year 2023. Once everyone lists their predictions, the thread will lock on Jan. 1st and Bingo cards will be generated for those who wish to play along. 

Requested prediction structure:

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1.
2.
3.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1.
2.
3.
etc.

*Less-Likely:*

1.
2.
3.
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1.
2.
3.
etc.


----------



## JackoVerde (Dec 20, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1 ralph dies
2. jim dies
3. chris gets out of jail and is arrested shortly after


----------



## TV's Adam West (Dec 20, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Aquana/ Adam White troons out
2. Boogie fucking DIES
3. Mister Metokur dies


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Elon Musk somehow manages to piss off everyone again
2. Jonathan Yaniv has another lawsuit
3. Chris Chan is sentenced by june 14th


*Less-Likely:*

1. Danny Sexbang of Game Grumps fame has a sexual misconduct allegation
2.  Another cope, seethe, dilate celebration from fat man in a dress Jim Sterling
3. Something involving Nintendo fans and molestation.
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Shmorky comes back
2. Nick Reiketa and Ethan Ralph stream together
3. Adam White gets his life together.
etc.


----------



## Hüftpriester (Dec 20, 2022)

> *Up to Three Submissions for Card:*


1. Joe Biden says the word 'catboy'
2. Kanye West makes a Kiwifarms account and becomes the most prolific A&H schizoposter.
3. Baked Alaska will be arrested for sexual assault


> *Likely:*


1. The kino casino ends after Warski moves into a Canadian psychiatric facility.
2. PPP is cold.
3. Milo releases dirt on everyone he's worked with over the past year or so.


> *Less-Likely:*


1. Fuentes gets a girlfriend
2. Warski gets a girlfriend
3. The girlfriends of Fuentes and Warski are biological women


----------



## RACISM (Dec 20, 2022)

1 - another suicide is pinned on the farms.
2 - the server in Serbia actually gets shelled as the war expands.
3 - Chris-Chan is released and becomes a multimedia superstar for 15 minutes where he says the most retarded shit you've ever heard and is vilified.


----------



## Rafael Epstein (Dec 20, 2022)

Do you only want Ralph-centered predictions or is this for 2023 in general? Assuming the former,

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph goes to court.
2. Another demon baby is made/born.
3. Ralph spends the night in hospital.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Ralph does a celebration stream for Jim's death
2. PPP streams from a bed as he is no longer able to walk
3. Andy admits to being back on the Cokeski
etc.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Ralph becomes an integral part of YE24
2. Vickers and Ralph irl fight
3. Ralph attempts to find Josh irl, dies
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Rekieta cuck tape
2. Ralph and Meigh have a wedding
3. Jim outlives Ralph


----------



## not william stenchever (Dec 20, 2022)

Drunken alien rednecks will penetrate american airspace at approximately 11:45 PM US Eastern time on 12/31/22 and they will cybernetically modify ralph so that he is practically immortal with a direct connection to the internet. They will have done this because they think it is funny.


----------



## JackoVerde (Dec 20, 2022)

Hüftpriester said:


> 2. Kanye West makes a Kiwifarms account and becomes the most prolific A&H shizoposter.


kanye west is literally like 2 or 3 degrees of separation away from Josh Moon.
he could very well make a kiwifarms account, he might even lurk it


----------



## GhaeicSD (Dec 20, 2022)

*My Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Jim dies.
2. Patrick Tomlinson is outed as a pedophile.
3. Chris Chan is found guilty of incest.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Another siege on the Farms, not predicting whether it succeeds or not.
2. Jack Scalfini finally has another health crisis.
3. PPP and Warski burn the casino and go into hiding for a few months.

*Less-Likely:*

1. EvaXephon/YandereDev officially stops development on Yandere Simulator, cites "da trolls".
2. Jim Sterling's -200k subscriber cope video.
3. Bam Margera dies.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Donald Trump Jr. is appointed the new CEO of Twitter by Elon Musk.
2. Canada goes into full revolt/civil war.
3. Newfags start reading the rules and practicing good opsec. Null's efforts are so successful the Easy to Track Hall of Shame is shut down for good.


----------



## Sock Cucker (Dec 20, 2022)

Assuming Ralph and the sector only:

For the card:

1. Ralphababy #3
2. Ralphababymama #3
3. After 1 and 2, May kicks Ralph's ass.

Edit: in light of recent events, I would like to amend #3 to " Someone with the last name of Morris (male or female) kicks Ralph's ass".

Edit2: Upon reflection, Ralph is such a pussy that Morris the cat might be the one to give the next beatdown. He counts, too.


----------



## Pit Viper Salesman (Dec 20, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ethan Ralph will be be facing charges that threaten a sentence of over a year in jail.
2. Nick Fuentes will either sell or abandon Cozy.tv
3. A prominent member of America First will be caught in a gay scandal.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Ethan Ralph will not see his son more than 3 times in the year 2023.
2. A woman will become pregnant with Ralph's 3rd child. Will somehow continue the barnyard theme.
3. PPP's former posse will become more devoted to gayopping him.
4. The Retarded Phoenix will rise again with yet another show. Will set a weight limit for 2nd chair.
5. Nick Rekieta will have a full Ralpha moment on stream which will be remembered as one of the most epic meltdowns in history.
6. Dick Masterson will yet again damage part of his body in order to avoid Ralph.
7. Other site hosts will begin asking Josh to consult for them on how to protect their sites from cancellation. "Alog, Inc." will be born.


*Less-Likely:*

1. PPP has a completely mental breakdown. In the midst of a massive boxed wine bender he appears on stream and begins screaming at his enemies and referring to himself as Liquid Ralph. 
2. Kanye and Nick start their own church and build a compound in the mid-west. They begin inviting groypers to visit and be cleansed of their base human urges and be taught how to love all men equally and as passionately as God would demand of them.
3. Local Hero Christopher Holloman is honored for for his dedication working with at-risk youth when he forms a curling team that becomes an international competitor. It is said he has trained some of the greatest sweepers of a generation. 
4. With the decline and likely implosion of the commentary community as well as his relationship prospects looking slim (lol), Nicholas DeOrio becomes the next man to marry Chantal.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. In a shocking twist fit for the likes of an episode of Better Call Saul, the Prosecution in the case The United States vs. Ethan Ralph executes a mind boggling maneuver after spending a year researching and studying Kiwi Farms leading to Ralph's eventual incarceration. It is later taught in Harvard Law school as The Haru Technique.

2. As Hollywood continues to run out of ideas and streaming networks become more and more desperate for content, a network executive coming down from a coke bender discovers Cozy.tv and signs Ali Jamal, Beardson Beardly and Chaggot to a multi-year reality series deal where women bring them home to their family for dinner as a means to prank their family. 

3. After the sad passing of James Augustine, his lawyer delivers an earth shattering life stream in which he reads the Last Will and Testament of Mister Metokur. In the stream it is revealed that he is actually the long lost oldest son of Ronnie Ralph who had left him in the care of his parents at a young age and had swore to never to reveal this shocking truth or the name his daddy gave him. Furthermore, it was revealed that he secretly had been visiting and caring for the unspoken of Evan Ralph. Forty years later Xander and Rozy still leave flowers on the grave of their Uncle Jim while still attempting to find the headstone of their father as the acid from all the piss on his grave had worn away the lettering.
etc.


----------



## GamerGateSurvivor (Dec 20, 2022)

Predictions:
1. Ralph gets assaulted at Ralphamania.
2. Ralph and Pantsu somehow lose custody of their daughter.
3. MC Jarbo somehow manages to pull Kanye West on for a dis track against Ralph.

Likely:
1. Ralph goes to jail for failure to pay child support.
2. He does an IBS stream with Asstone and Cokeski.
2. He sharts himself on said stream.

Less-Likely:
1. Ralph finds a new platform to stream on and he ditches the Catboy Fuhrer.
2. Ralph starts bringing on Killstream guests who hate KF, including Cyrax and Fat Rick Thomlinson.
3. An embarrassing sex tape of Rekeita leaks, giving Ralph record Killstream views as he gives a frame-by-frame analysis of the Minnesota Corn Harvest.

WTF, Lol:
1. Ralph starts making amazing content which turns his financial fortunes around.
2. Ralph lands a Killstream interview with the True and Honest Christian Weston Chandler.
3. That interview turns into an IBS stream as he somehow manages to pull in Ian Brandon Anderson too.


----------



## MvAgusta (Dec 20, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph spawns another demon baby
2. Ralph goes to jail
3. Warski and PPP separate over gay drama


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Godwinson continues his war against PPP
2. Tardski starts a new show with some other person
3. Fuentes gets into some major controversy

*Less-Likely:*

1. Fuentes troons out
2. Warski dates a troon openly
3. PPP tries the long walk back but fails

*Wtf, lol?*

1. PPP loses weight 
2. Ralph stops drinking 
3. Fuentes is actually straight


----------



## Kiwi Kitty 2.0 (Dec 20, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Chris is sentenced by July, convicted of incest
2. Barb croaks
3. Luna (pumpkin patch expando head of Beauty Parlor fame)  finally dies (god willing)


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Alex Mahan (YanDev) does something to get his shitiness back into the mainstream eye
2. King Glizzyhands (King Charles) dies and the Harry/Meghan dicksuckers lose their shit
3. Trumptards fall for another griftscam like the NFT/trading card shit

*Less-Likely:*

1. Another suicide is pasted onto KF shoulders (+100 social credit if it's Keffals)
2. "Hate and Shame 2" finally surfaces
3. Assassination attempt against J.K. Rowling by troons

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Yandere Simulator is released (full game, not another "demo" or beta release on steam)
2. Barb survives
3. Yaniv gets through the year without incident
4. The dimensional merge happens


----------



## Tofu Dust (Dec 20, 2022)

By 2023 Keffals will find love and happiness..



Spoiler: ;)



with a rope or loaded gun.


----------



## Johnny Eastwood cash (Dec 20, 2022)

1. Kanye west loses to ron DeSantis Ethan and his friends cry about it on there streams
2. Kthan Ralph goes in to a food coma 
3. Ethan gets beat up by Chris Chan


----------



## There Is Light At The End (Dec 20, 2022)

My prediction follows:

Jim retires and resorts to just shitpost on fediverse
Ralph merry marries mare
Chris chan released from prison by presidential orders


----------



## Dumpster dived waifu (Dec 20, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:
1. Ralph once again finds himself under the barrel of the courts gun only to somehow get out "untouched"*
* Admits guilt on crime, but serves suspended sentence
2. Nick Fuentes gay sex tape is leaked, his followers are divided between "sucking cock is based" and "faggot Fuentes tricked me into letting him tickle my balls"
3. Dax and/or Vito make another unsuccessful attempt to normalize pedophilia 


Additional Predictions:

Likely:
1. Jim Sterling 800k seethe video
2. Spoony finally kills himself instead of being indecisive 
3. Another retard Troon decides to crusade against the farms only to have farmers dig up horrible/embarassing stuff about them they now want desperately to memoryhole

Less-Likely:
1. Ralph actually marries Meigh
2. Chris-Chan is found not guilty, but its not insanity
3. We get another year long riot over a meth head dying to the hands of the police despite all evidence proving he was a danger to society and the cops were justified

Wtf, lol?
1. Ralph restarts his crusade against Jim and actually goes to stakeout his house
2. Kanye reveals this has all been a ploy to reveal America Firsts faggotry to the world
3. A Troon travels to Ukraine to firebomb our servers, only to be gunned down by Russians, farms to blame


----------



## Brutality (Dec 20, 2022)

Likely
-. Chris Chan will be put into an institution not knowing that the true and honest Liquid Chris has returned 
-. Ethan Ralph will get another girl knocked up and leave Meigh and the Foal.
-. Jim passes the torch and retires his internet presence to spend the last of his days in peace.

Less Likely
-. Keffals Joins the 41% Hall of Shame
-. PPP has a heart attack on livestream immediately after breaking his chair 
-. Kanye Suicides by Cop in a manic episode

wtf lol
-. Patrick Tomlinson is exposed as a serial killer who grinds black children into pepperoni in his basement 
-. Escalation of Russia/Ukraine War leads to WW3
-. Nick Fuentes comes out of the closet


----------



## Terrorist (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Beardson-Loomer Demon Baby
2. New Ralph nudes, revealing a starfish to rival PPP's.
3. Esoteric Gatorism declared state religion

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Brian Risso/Blade becomes immobile, possibly dies
2. Bam Margera dies
3. Gothic King Cobra's dental health leads to a serious medical situation
4. Jim continues to have 6 months to live for another 5 years

*Less-Likely:*

1. Big Lenny dies
2. Andrew Dobson inexplicably inflates again
3. FTM Ralph conspiracy revealed. Coverup at the highest levels of government.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Matthew Vickers realizes being extremely combative online only hurts his family and goes offline for good
2. Nick Rekieta keeps his sex life private in favor of giving accurate predictions on legal matters
3. Dick Masterson stops befriending and defending open pedophiles


----------



## Ghost of Guntmas Past (Dec 21, 2022)

1. Kanye goes broke and Nick Fuentes goes woke like Richard Spencer and sells Cozy TV to some other streaming site.
2. Ethan Ralph gets booted off Cozy and crawls back to Odysee with lackluster support, back to streaming to 3-400 people max like in 2021.
3. Andy Warski starts a new show with someone else. PPP reunites with Surfer, who is now homeless, and they learn to grift together.


----------



## lysol terminal (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. New Animal-Themed Wife.
2. Ralphamales Stay Winning.
3. I become his co-host.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. At least 2 court hearings.
2. He maintains a steady course.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Actual Jail-time (At least 2 weeks).
2. He moves again.


----------



## stupid frog (Dec 21, 2022)

Sock Cucker said:


> Assuming Ralph and the sector only:
> 
> For the card:
> 
> ...


When I saw this was in the Ralph forum, this was basically my prediction too. I don't want a card though.


----------



## Kendall Motor Oil (Dec 21, 2022)

1. It's theorized by a KF member or Gunt orbiter that Meigh's child is developmentally delayed. Ralph denies it.
2. No Killstream IRL events.
3. Ralph doesn't get doxed unless May takes a poor opsec selfie.

I don't know how good of a mother she is but the concern is there.


----------



## Balldo's Gate (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph streams with PPP
2. Ralph served with legal papers at Ralphamania or wedding
3. Dick Masterson replaces Vito as co-host with Nick Rekieta


----------



## ManiacalChrisBenoit (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Nick Rekieta trash talks Null
2. Twitter returns to being a pre-Elon hellscape
3. Keffals apologizes to Destiny, they stream together.


----------



## Needless (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph's new location is found (self dox)
2. May leaves Ralph
3. Nick reaches true lolcow status which leads to Null no longer being friends with him


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Nothing changes in the Ukraine Russia conflict
2. Jim stops streaming (not because he dies, he'll just get too sick)
3. Kanye campaign ends with him denouncing Fuentes, and saying he was merely pretending be retarded


*Less-Likely:*

1. Ralph and Andy team up again
2. Keffals is arrested for Sexual Assault of a minor
3. Null has the greatest month of his life

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Elon becomes aware of KF and offers to finance (not serious)
2. Numerous Politian's are arrested for treason
3. Null goes to Canada and claims the true queen of KF Chantal as his bride


----------



## Peru oso donas (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. The Tranch moves to Pennywise's house, Bonner has to cope, seethe and dilate over his property becoming a wasteland.
2. Keffals/Eliot/another retarded troon tries to take down the farms and fails miserably in the process.
3. Nick Rekieta goes full SJW and starts sucking tranny cock.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Chris gets released from custody, and gets sent to jail again because he immediately tries going back to his house.
2. Ralph gets his shit beaten in another country again, may or not be Portugal to.
3. Kanye starts sucking jew cock in a pitiful attempt to unfuck his life.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Ralph has another child.
2. Gay sex tape involving Nick/Milo/Kanye gets leaked.
3. Eliot Dong Gone gets fired/gets arrested for doing one too many consent accidents.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Kanye commits suicide via gunshot wound to the back of the head.
2. Chris gets sent to a autist home and gets killed by an unreleated schizo/and retarded ween wanting to be "christory's greatest troll".
3. One of the #DropKiwiFarms trannies joins the 41%, and of course, we get the blame.


----------



## Little i Internet (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Jim survives 2023
2. Joe Biden takes a fall and goes FDR mode
3. Ralph shart incident #2873


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Tranch abandoned
2. Minecraft youtuber pedophile saga #8612872
3. Boogie dies again
etc.

*Less-Likely:*

1. PPP buries the hatchet and joins a MATI stream
2. Destiny unironically names them
3. Baked Alaska extended sentence
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Ralph redemption arc
2. Nick Fuentes has a child
3. Patrick Tomlinson admits fault and apologizes
etc.


----------



## Pitbull Victim (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. PPP loses a substantial amount of money betting on the Super Bowl and begins grifting in ways more shameless than anything seen before.
2. Fuentes is booted by Kanye after Kanye falls in with the Nation of Islam; Kanye becomes a Howard Hughes-style recluse.
3. Baked Alaska gets extremely fat in prison after his parents load up his comissary with cash and he sits around depression-eating.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Patrick Tomlinson drunkenly posts a picture of his penis.
2. Warski aborts another child.
3. A passed-out drunk Blade has a toe eaten by a stray dog.


Less-Likely:

1. Matthew Vickers dies from something retarded like choking on a pretzel and Ralph experiences the equivalent of religious ecstasy.
2. Milo hooks-up with fellow weird homo David Brock and becomes a DNC shill.
3. Something Awful finally shuts down.


Wtf, lol?

1. Ralph loses a shit-load of weight but is somehow even more unhealthy than before.
2. Zoe Quinn kills another guy.
3. Schmorky remerges as a Born-Again Christian and no longer wears the Yarn Wig.


----------



## Mr. Manchester (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ethan Ralph Divorce Arc
2. KingCobraJFS will lose at least one tooth
3. PPP and Warski will get into a physical altercation (and at least one of them cries)


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Confirmation that Chris Chan gets time served and ends up in the looney bin forever
2. The forum will have a bunch of downtime, gets reported as dead, then comes back again.  Registration is locked for 3 months.
3. The feds and Kanye will get bored with Fuentes and his catboys and cut all ties

*Less-Likely:*

1. Chantal starts saying a lot of bad things about God's Chosen and finally gets the boot from youtube
2. Chris gets set free and finds a place to live, helped by the state or some retard
3. The forum has a moment of widespread positive attention.  Registration is locked for 3 months. 

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Chantal actually joins ISIS and moves to Syria forever.
2. Ralph loudly admits his love of eating actual shit and dog murder.
3. A leak from the forum proves that 90% of the users are not only convicted stalkers but are also actual children.


----------



## Johnny Salami (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Tim Pool will sperg out at the patrons to his coffee shop he builds
2. Taylor Lorenz will be let go from the WaPo. She will then release dirt on everyone
3. Sam Hyde will confront Hasan in person and Hasan will run away. He will then say he spared Sam.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Ethan Klein will stop making money for YouTube and will be terminated to eliminate a perception of Jewish preference
2. TheQuartering will sperg about people not buying his coffee
3. Metekour will die
etc.

Less-Likely:

1. Lydia from Tim Pools show will have nudes/sex tape leaked
2. Patrick Tomlinson will get kicked out of Hooligans for life
3. Nick Fuentes will be revealed to have a blacked fetish
etc.

Wtf, lol?

1. Tim Pool sex cult
2. Jack Murphy will be invited to MSNBC/CNN to talk about how the right wing attacks jews with non-conservative sex views
3. A 2015 Kiwifarms user will be doxed by the MSM and be made public enemy


----------



## PonderosaPete (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Ralph gets his 3rd beating in Portugal
3. Chris gets released and is taken in by a ween, starting the couch serf(ing) saga
3. Random Deathfat dies( safe bet)


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Andy Warski gets a tranny girlfriend ( totally not gay)
2. Reiketa goes full degenerate mode
3. Tranny girlfriend breaks up with Andy and starts showing up on Tim-cast (totally not gay)

Less-Likely:

1. Any lolcow learns a meaningful lesson
2. The tranch comes back, but with less animal abuse
3. Re4 remake is good

Wtf, lol?

1. Balkanization of North America 
2. Keffels gets monkey pox in the new annual Toronto all mens orgy
3. More Aidyn Paladin nudes are dropped ( nice essays, better tits)


----------



## Telecom (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:
1. PPP and Warski will break up, daddy jim will have a "the casino is burning down" stream
2. ITS ANOTHER GODWINSON LIVE NEWS UPDATE
3. Ralph will be mentioned by pewdiepie, pewds will reference a farms meme

Additional Predictions:

Likely:
1. There will be substantial proof PPP overpowered and anally raped a drunk warski
2. Rekieta meltdown storyline, outside chance he is nearing divorce by end of 2023
3. There will be a week long crisis on the farms started by the vtuber thread, blood will be spilled, history will vindicate null on the anime question

Less-Likely:
1. Right wing twitter drama spreads to the farms, major flame wars break out as major accounts are doxed in mass
2. Milo's blackmail vault leaks, it has invaluable material which american leftists use to connect jan 6th to gamergate
3. A middling youtuber attempts to create an hours long "the entire history of kiwifarms", videos are neutral but they suck
4. A major sports star has a leaked nudes breakdown and creates a farms account to argue with people

Wtf, lol?
1. A major celebrity death is leaked on the farms a day before its reported by the media
2. John mcafee is alive, he will be in contact with jim watkins, highly likely he is now qanon
3. Elon musk or jk rowling will link to kiwifarms after a troon does something heinous, tucker carlson utters the name "joshua connor moon"


----------



## teeth fairy (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. kingcobrajfs spice saga kicks into full gear
2. ralph just dies. no report of why until a full 8 months later 
3. cyrax kills someone


----------



## Dumb Bitch Smoothie (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Nick Rekieta goes full retard and tries to reveal information about Null that backfires on him; Josh proves that he's got more common sense by not having revealed anything damning to Nick. After this occurs Nick gets worse and somehow gets arrested for it, and/or is no longer able to practice law.
2. Liz Fong-Jones or the Dropkiwifarms faggot commit suicide. Double points if both.
3. A major tranny e-celeb/regular celeb will detransition, starting a trend of other detransitioners.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Henry Cavill gets accused of rape but he deflects it because man's been training his whole life to deflect bullshit.
2. Ethan Ralph has a major health scare or something that ends in a surgery that keeps him out of the game for a while but he films himself being himself while in the hospital 
3. Eugenia Cooney finally croaks. 
4. Byuu returns.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Catboys are out -- bunny boys and girls become the new it thing.
2. Biden croaks, Capitol Hill becomes the designated shitting street.
3. James Earl Jones becomes the next iconic voice actor to pass.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Null gets a gf, Kiwifarms implodes after this discovery and it becomes the new cool thing to start big speculation shitposts after AnOnimous or Dyn makes the first ridiculous girlfriend shitpost.
2. The Try Guys get a fat black "queer" diversity hire to take Ned Fulmer's spot whose entire personality is being a special snowflake. This person clearly clashes with everyone else but they can't get rid of it because "racism."
3. Ethan Ralph and Meigh have another child.


----------



## Xe-Hulk: Atrooney at Law (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Catboys are referenced by CNN in a Fuentes hit-piece and trannies start an internet campaign to reclaim catboys from Fuentes.
2. Keffals gets increasingly desperate for attention post-#DropKiwiFarms and does something incredibly stupid.
3. Chris Chan is released from jail and is fucked with by attention-seeking retards and bribed with McDonald's like Terry Davis


*Additional Predictions:*

*Likely:*

1. Elon Musk puts off selecting a new Twitter CEO, and when he does, nothing changes.
2. The Biden administration has a televised summit about how totally not antisemitic they are, and that being antisemitic is gay and cringe.
3. Chantal evicts Peetz so her Muslim husband can move in.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Rekieta opens an OnlyFans.
2. WingsOfRedemption's chair collapses on him live.
3. BakedAlaska abandons his trad-Catholic-alt-right persona after the Ye2024 campaign fails and shifts into a Libertarian then eventually full-on Liberal.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. After an extended period of silence, Ethan Ralph shows up in a cartel execution video.
2. Boogie, playing his Francis character, attempts to rob a bank to pay his crypto-related debt.
3. Patrick S. Tomlinson brings a news crew into his house, and a sausage maker is visible in his basement.


----------



## Kikemaster (Dec 21, 2022)

1. Jim dies
2. Troons die
3. Soyfags cope


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Some gay shit happens and gets pinned on KF
2. Biden fucking dies
3. Boogie dies
4. Russia annexes the contested 4 regions of Ukraine
5. Murdoch Murdoch makes a return

*Less-Likely:*

1. KF gets hacked and accounts leak
2. Major debate/court case in the US about the legality of child porn/pedophilia
3. Civil wars start it at least 2 countries
4. THEY make an all-encompassing blacklist to bar dissenters from receiving any payment in any form
5. The EU loses one more member state
6. Dick Masterson abandons his career

*Wtf, lol?*

1. The 19th amendment gets repealed in the US
2. Israel gets abandoned by its allies


----------



## Easy lasagna recipes (Dec 21, 2022)

1 - nick rekieta sex tape, or at least nudes that are more than just his hank hill ass (maybe even with the balldo?)
2 - something happens with kingcobrajfs that finally results in the clintervention
3 - ethan ralph dies, either from the cartel or from fat


----------



## ReasonablyRetarded (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Tammy Slaton dies, has to be cremated in a zoo.
2. Ralph has another kid with a different woman & his money starts to run out real quick because of it
3. PPP & Warski have a surfer-esque falling out


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Jim Metokur croaks
2. OnlyUseMeBlade dies, commentary youtubers suddenly give a fuck about him & grift hard
3. Yaniv has contact of a sexual nature with a minor

Less-Likely:

1. Ethan Klein has his 26382nd controversy, actually sees consequences for it
2. Nikocado will actually lose weight 
3. Ethan Ralph has a heart attack

Wtf, lol?

1. Foodie Beauty gets beat/punished for eating pork
2. Joe Biden reveals his dementia was a ploy to coax America's enemies into making powerplays, reveals himself to be an ultrapatriot & Dark Brandon rises.
3. Russian missles strike outside of Ukraine, other Eastern European nations join the fight directly, Western European nations refuse to join in, leading to the collapse of the EU or even NATO


----------



## frari (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Chris is released from jail, but disappears into some loony bin and is not heard from again

2. Nick Fuentes gets caught sucking cock

3. Chantal gets stoned for doing something haram (Null has nervous breakdown)


----------



## Spunt (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Lucas Werner dies
2. Ethan Ralph is arrested for swatting
3. An IP2 streamer dies on camera


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Jim dies
2. ILJ re-emerges a-logging a different cow
3. Nick Fuentes is arrested after getting in a fight with a journalist


*Less-Likely:*

1. Lou Gagliardi dies
2. Patrick Tomlinson starts another lolsuit
3. Peetz becomes homeless


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Rackets releases a nude calendar
2. Null sues Liz Dong Gone
3. Ye troons out


----------



## Blitzsneed (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*
1. Ralph gets spitroasted by Vickers and Morris in court and will go into jail/prison.
2. Ralph can't shut up and gets his ass kicked (again), but not as bad as in Portugal. "ARREST HIM!"
3. DSP still outlives everyone.

*Additional Predictions:
Likely:*
1. Rekieta can't stop getting high off of the ballwashing from wine aunts/moms and turns into a true cow, denouncing the Farms and Null.
2. The incest charge sticks and CWC will be sent into prison.
3. Nick Fuentes getting his ass kicked either by moon crickets or commie faggots. It's most likely getting caught on tape.
4. Kinochet doing shit so retarded that he will get his own thread.

*Less-Likely:*
1. Metokur manages to make it through 2023, even if there will be radio silence for at least 2 months.
2. Nick Fuentes' sex tape getting leaked.
3. Baked Alaska's meth handjob tape gets leaked and Milo completely loses his shit.
4. Godwinson turning into Ralph's co-host.
5. Ralph putting off his glasses at Ralphamania and someone taking a picture of it at the best possible moment, providing evidence that Ralph's eyes are crooked as fuck.

*Wtf, lol?*
1. Ralph manages to piss off a cartel member and we will see footage of him getting killed.
2. Fuentes sells cozy.tv after he realizes his political career is over.
3. Baked Alaska manages to get shanked and die in prison.
4. Dick Masterson getting busted for possessing CP.



Spoiler: Predictions not from the Ralphasphere



*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*
1. Idubbbz and Anisa will get divorced (or Creator Clash 2 is going to be a complete trashfire, tanking Icuckkkz repuation even further)
2. Keffals will kill himself or pull a Byuu and pin it on the Farms.
3. Chantal will be divorced and goes back to Canada after SALAH gets his residence permit to Leafland.

*Additional Predictions:
Likely:*
1. Shädman will be sent to prison.

*Less-Likely:*
1. Several troons are outed doing heinous shit so bad that mainstream media picks up on it, doing irreversible damage to the tranny fad.
2. WWIII kicks off. We all die by nuclear hellfire (the lucky ones) or in a ditch with radiation sickness.
3. A "famous" JewTuber (1mil. subs minimum) that wasn't a cow turns into a full-blown one.

*Wtf, lol?*
1. A tape of Jim Sterling jacking off or being naked while larping as a woman gets leaked.


----------



## keytar solo (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Sex tape leaked of Rekieta banging a tranny
2. Warski has a complete mental breakdown, runs naked into traffic screaming BEEEJAAAMS
3. Boogie dies but from something unrelated to being fat and having cancer (he rolls his car or something idk)


*Additional Predictions:

 Likely:*

1. Ralph knocks up a random ho, Meigh will either leave him or pretend she's into being cucked
2. Blade finally has to get something amputated
3. PPP somehow gets even fatter

*Less-Likely:*

1. An as-yet-undiscovered lolcow will launch another crusade against the Farms, will also lose bitterly
2. Upon getting out of prison, Baked immediately maces someone else and gets arrested again
3. Meigh leaves Ralph of her own volition, runs off with a Mexican

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Jim face reveal
2. Fuentes revealed to be a method actor doing it all for the lulz, catboys everywhere on suicide watch
3. The Lich Queen dies.


----------



## Fastest Hand In The East (Dec 21, 2022)

Ralph will get his ass kicked again. I dont know how, I dont know where, be we all know it will happen.
This is even barely a prediction.


----------



## 4stardaysbahbe (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph flies to a different country and gets beaten up again for soliciting underage girls
2. kween kewfawls will detroon after getting btfo so hard
3. Jim Metokur will live through the entirety of 2023


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Nick Fuentes' kanye/groyper shtick dies completely and he reveals he's gay to try and grift the homosexual left and/or the 'conservative' right, possibly falling in with Milo again
2. Baked informant goes to a fed prison and gets fatter from fed food.
3. Chantal's boyfriend/husband forces her to lose weight OR gets her even fatter (depends entirely if he's a feeder or not)


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Fatrick Tomlinson realizes HE is the stalker child
2. Granny tranny Tommy Tooter revives the tranch for great stone justice
3. PPP finally gives birth to Warski's cokefiend black baby


----------



## A Rastafarian Skeleton (Dec 21, 2022)

Ralph gets his own trashy reality show on TLC about life as an alcoholic sex offender felon hiding from child support in Mexico.


----------



## internet friend (Dec 21, 2022)

Only need one prediction: PPPs weight hits 4 digits


----------



## CharcoalChkn (Dec 21, 2022)

1. Ye unalives.
2. Boogie has another public felony incident to revive his dying channel.
3. Anisa Johma claims she was sexually assaulted/raped on the bottom of someone elses tweet.


----------



## Well-groomed Discord User (Dec 21, 2022)

1, Kelly divorces Wingo.
2. Life divorces Boogie.
3. OnlyUseMeBlade looses a pair of toes.


----------



## Black Spruce (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Chris's autism deferral works but he is relegated to a group home.
2. Ralph dies.
3. Rekeita becomes a full blown cow and his streams become defined by trolls.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Barb dies.
2. Russia wins the war and the media and their clapping seal audience forget about it and move on.
3. The Great Chicago Nig-Out of January 2023 begins when the no-cash bail law goes into effect.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Johnathan Yaniv's rot hole puts him in the hospital for sepsis or gangrene.
2. Keffals gets arrested for child porn.
3. Drachenlord's new place of residence is doxxed and the cycle starts over.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Another Brenton Tarrant copycat manifesto nigger.
2. Trudeau is assassinated.
3. Kanye West begins campaigning and preforms the roman salute on stage.


----------



## byuu (Dec 21, 2022)

2023 is gonna be the Year of Tonkasaw.


----------



## Micheal Westen (Dec 21, 2022)

Everyone took my predictions so ill just do the wtf category ️

1. Spectre, Christorian X and Kinochet come together and make a podcast called "The Daily Bottomfeeder".

2. Kanye gets tired of "Ye" and names himself "Lord Niggercockem of the Rebellion". Demands Everyone call him that or he chimps out. Buys every shirt, hoodie, and dress ever made from Gucci and has his artists weave "LORD NIGGERCOCKEMS 24'" on every one of them. Sells them for 20$ each because Lord Niggercockem is a man of the people.

3. Warski breaks up with PPP; then starts streaming with flamenco and jims dead body. Flamenco literally goes and steals Jim's lifeless, maggot infested corpse from the cemetary. They eventually get arrested for being graverobbers.

4. Gator still tries to fuck somethingweebtrash and the empty egg carton denies him at every turn. Maybe invite her to this thread Gator? I hear people her age love Bingo night.

Also an actual prediction I don't think I've seen:
Someone else from AF gets arrested. Probably multiple. Thanks Baked!


----------



## AncientPhosphur (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ethan Ralph ends up in another endless legal battle with yet another father of his baby momma who he doesn’t marry
2. Vito gets arrested for possession of child porn
3. PPP gets fatter


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Null loses that weight
2. Ethan Ralph DUI arc
3. Patrick S Tomlinson shoots someone who thinks is one of his “stalkers” but is just a random black man

*Less-Likely:*

1. Nikavocado dies from heart failure
2. Boogie dies
3. Russia takes Kiev


----------



## LikeAStone 2.0 (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Kanye gets investigated by glowing alphabet agencies 
2. Keffals has a major meltdown online over sexual misconduct allegations 
3. Barbra Chandler finally kicks the bucket


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Elon gets butthurt and bails on Twitter 
2. Gunt catches an STD
3. Ben Collins crosses a line and gets absolutely shitcanned by every news outlet


Less-Likely:

1. Kanye drops a new album
2. Ukraine gets a WMD dropped on them
3. Orson Zedd tries to comeback to the Farms

Wtf, lol?

1. The Tranch Civil war breaks out, leading to actual arson on the property 
2. Nick Fuentes catches HIV
3. Chris walks free, summons the Antichrist, and is actually discovered to not be delusional. Null is labeled as a prophet, and we are all saved as “True Believers” as Chris spares us from the Lake of Fire.


----------



## Preacher ✝ (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Murdered by the Cartel
2. Divorces Meigh
3. Gets arrested and thrown in prison


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Beaten up on foreign soil for a third time. (if he's living in Mexico is the USA foreign soil now?)
2. Meigh gets pregnant again and has a son that Ralph sees befor Xander
3. Gets cheated on by or cheats on Meigh
etc.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Actually sees Xander for the first time
2. "Leaked" Honey Moon Sex Tape 
3. Finger rots off from pawpaws ring
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Truly finds Jesus, repents his sins, and starts to turn things around.
2. Ends the year without any court cases hanging over him
3. Makes a single genuine apology. 
etc.


----------



## Buttz McSmellington (Dec 21, 2022)

1. Nick Rekieta swaps wives with Ralph.
2. The Horse gets pregnant again.
3. Chris is released and moves in with Ralph where they start the live stream equivalent of The Odd Couple.


----------



## Alabaster Disaster (Dec 21, 2022)

1. Vaush has a "sexual misconduct" arc
2. Drachenlord develops a drug addiction
3. Ralph declares a former ally to be an enemy. Going with Queen Kuh-falls.

Suggested free space: Patrick Tomlinson remains fat


----------



## Manu7 (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Keffals finds a way to open a new gofundme
2. 99% of lolcows who left twitter for mastodon will return to twitter
3. another tranny commits 41% and people will blame the farms


----------



## Punished Puck (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph loses a foot to diabetes
2. Liz fong jones tries to hunt null down in serbia
3. Keffals 41%s


----------



## Franz Joseph (Dec 21, 2022)

1. Laura Loomer gets knocked up, reveals that Ralph is the father.

2. Milo/Ralph/Sargon sextape surfaces.

3. In a desperate attempt to avoid jail time, Baked Alaska throws Nick Fuentes under the bus.


----------



## Kaktus Kompot (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Moviebob suffers from a major health problem, keeps tweeting in the hospital bed.
2. Arin Hanson comes out as a theythem.
3. Shadman dies of drug related complications.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Jim Sterling dips below 800k subscribers and gets his balls removed (but keeps the dick).
2. Disney announces their first trans protagonist.
3. Peetz starts an onlyfans to be able to afford rent.
4. Another ugly addition is made to the LGBT flag.
5. Keffals has a mental breakdown on stream.
6. Nikokado has a heart attack.
7. Andrew Dobson returns to the Internet as a stunning and brave woman.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Someone attempts to assassinate Musk.
2. Shoeonhead gets knocked up.
3. Anisa gets knocked up.
4. Accidental Stonetoss face reveal.
5. Buck Breaking II: Break Harder.


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Kevin Gibes gets married.
2. Netflix announces a documentary about Terry A. Davis.
3. Boogie dies (for real)


----------



## chalkyresidue (Dec 21, 2022)

Rippa will get in trouble with the IRS for playing libertarian shell games with the ISOM money
As nerd franchises continue to crash and burn at the box office and public anger turns to apathy, the toxic fandom griftosphere will expand into weirder grifts. Scientology 2.0 looms on the horizon
Eugenia Cooney gets so into streaming Just Dance that she gets heavy into physical fitness, starting a new chapter of Exercise Anorexia


----------



## Randall Fragg (Dec 21, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:
1. The Mario Movie is terrible and Moviebob has a breakdown on twitter about it.
2. Chris is released from jail, scoots by with minor charges
3. Kayne West joins the Farms

Additional Predictions:

Likely:
1. Patrick Tomlinson is humiliated after the Obscura episode on SFWA is released. Locks twitter account. 
2. The Ukraine war grinds to a halt, Russia gets away with a pyrrhic victory. 
3. Keffels tries another jihad, it fails miserably. 

Less-Likely:
1. LowTierGod actually kills someone
2. Biden dies, Harris becomes the most hated president in American history
3. Ukraine pulls a victory and drives Russia out. Putin is forced out of office, and is replaced by someone even more ultranationalist.

Wtf, lol?
1. The Farms gets positive mainstream attention
2. The Merge is real
3. Russia gets BTFO’d, nearly collapses. The House of Romanov is restored.


----------



## Smashed & Slamed (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Nick Rakieta get's CPS called on him
2. Tonka Saw tries to come back
3. Hasan Piker tries to get Sam Hyde arrested


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Ralph alcoholism leads to enough liver damage for him to need a transplant
2. Metokur will survive the year but won't be able to stream anymore
3. PPP gets as fat as Ralph

*Less-Likely:*

1. Patrick Tomlinson get's perma banned of twitter
2. Some Troon related to #DropKiwiFarms off themselves and blames the farms
3. Count Dankula becomes a lolcow

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Nick Fuentes get's arrested by the feds, he wasn't an agent just a retard this entire time.
2. Tariq Nasheed goes full Kanye and goes on about white lives matter and Hitler
3. Scott Adams becomes Trans


----------



## ( . Y . ) ԅ(´ڡ`ԅ) (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. We're going to lose the earthly presence of a record amount of deathfats in 2023.
2. Guntal and Salad divorce arc soon.
3. More Tub Trumpets & "No help has come." for Poorlissa, Joh and Go ez. (#SaveGomez)

*Additional Predictions:

Most Likely:*

1. Jack Scalfani has stroke #4 but somehow keeps making vids because everyone knows lolcows are as unkillable as roaches
2. We lose a MunchieCow to a self-inflicted ailment
3. Taylor Lorenz cries moar (muh Twitter)

*Less Likely:*

1. Null makes more merch, like hoodies and shit ()
2. Dylan Mulvaney does something "controversial" and gets "cancelled"
3. Ralph has a serious legal troubles arc

*What is wrong with you?*

1. Vampire Munchie Kelly Ronahan will pick one of her arms off
2. Onision troons out solely for clout and attention
3. Kiwifarms user Android Raptor will be given the badge of "honest-to-God BPD womanchild misanthrope" as a recognition for her thousands of hours debating everyone in the Thunderdome

eta: formatting


----------



## Tiger Jack (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Kiwifarms suffers another hacking attempt.
2. Someone gets seriously injured at Ralphamania, putting Ralph in legal hot water.
3. Ralph and Pantsu are involved in a domestic dispute.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*
1. Ralph concludes his suspended sentence without incident, will gloat about it and set himself up for another Portugal-tier L.
2. Asston and Andy have a falling out. The Casino officially goes bust.
3. The Ye campaign concludes without fanfare and Nick goes back to grifting. He will shamelessly namedrop Kanye for the rest of his life.

*Less Likely:*
1. Ethan and Hila Klien begin a very messy, very public divorce arc.
2. Beardson goes to a very dark place. Starts grifting pity donos from his audience by dropping not-so-subtle hints that he’s considering suicide.
3. Ralph is unceremoniously booted from Cozy, both sides will claim it was their decision.

*WTF, lol?*
1. Kiwifarms user Haru Okumura is revealed to have been Gator the entire time. 
2. Anisa gets pregnant, the child is Sam Hyde’s.
3. Nick Fuentes and AF drop the TradCath larp and convert to Islam.


----------



## Nikes_JustDoIt (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Farms go down due to trannies.
2. Ralph gets his ass kicked again.
3. Another nigger dies riot instefies.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Chris gets out of jail.
2.  A deathfat dies.
3. Reddit moment (something like anti-work interview )

*Less-Likely:*

1. Ralph gets married.
2.  AF gets exposed for being a gayops.
3.  The battle of Jim's driveway.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. A celebrity joins the farms / support the farms.
2.  Some rich guy buys Reddit or 4chan.
3.  Elon will have a face turn (becomes liked again)


----------



## TwoDollarPeePeePooPoo (Dec 21, 2022)

1. May leaves Ralph
2. Ralph rapes another woman except this time she gets pregnant
3. Ralph FUCKING dies


----------



## Epic Fail Man (Dec 21, 2022)

Ethan Ralph gets killed in the most brutal way by notorious KF user, Christorian X. Escaping the crime scene, the Guntboard anti-hero has turned to bloodshed for his dopamine consumption.


----------



## Randall Fragg (Dec 21, 2022)

Russia looses the war in Ukraine so hard that it Balkanizes. As Zelensky prepares to address the nation, the Azov battalion conducts a nationwide sweep of dissenters, 'Russophiles', and Jews. Zelensky opens his address by praising Hitler and revealing that he actually is a die-hard Neo-Nazi. The world can only watch in horror as the Ukrainian Aryan State marches into former Russian territory, conquering as many warlords as it can and enacting the Holholcaust. A&N will do a 180 and make Zelensky its husbando. As the thousand-year shadow of the Fourth Reich falls over Europe, a lone man sits in a bunker underneath the Urals. "I tried to warn them" says Putin. "I was just trying to stop the Nazis!"


----------



## Pale Empress (Dec 21, 2022)

Preacher ✝ said:


> 3. Gets cheated on by or cheats on Meigh
> etc.


Already happened, although technically they have an open relationship albeit one-sided in Ralph's favour. The pantsu pass is a meme for a reason.



Preacher ✝ said:


> 1. Actually sees Xander for the first time


Also already happened, in October, although I doubt there will be many repeat occurrences in 2023

*Sekturr Submissions*
1. Ralph begins an active feud with ROTC after Mersh makes an off-handed comment during a Nightwave show
2. Gator gets his Twitter account back and drops some DM receipts, although nothing particularly juicy, continuing to languish in obscurity and irrelevance
3. TonkaSaw mounts a comeback and becomes involved with Ralph after Ralphamania is a modest success. Jim Sterling also has peripheral involvement

*Additionally

likely *
1. Ralph visits Xander a single time during 2023, timing it so it lines up with a The Dick Show live event
2. Ralph is forced to make a temporary return to Odysee after cozy.gov is shuttered

*less likely*
1. Kino Casino ends amicably and Warski and PPP go their separate ways on good terms after finding more profitable grifting opportunities in greener pastures
2. Evan Ralph dies under mysterious circumstances and Ethan becomes moderately financially affluent for a short while before squandering it all
3. Zidan breaks his radio silence and makes a passing reference to Ralph/the killstream and Ralph loses his mind in response, although he stops just short of actually doxing Zidan

* improbable*
1. Ralph and Nicky Rackets join forces against the farms and do a series of streams with other various lolcows seething about broke dick pedophile Josh Moon and the stalker children
2. The Vickers clan and Ralph reconcile with all parties agreeing to behave amicably out of interest for Xander's wellbeing
3. Meigh and Ralph find a third wheel for their throuple which ends in disaster after Meigh abandons Ralph and Rozy for said wheel




Spoiler: Outside of the Sekturr



1. In the leadup to 2024, many right leanining content creators get banned en masse from Youtube, including Tim Pool, who launches a subscription only video platform
2. An IP2 streamer dies of an overdose on stream, drawing mainstream attention
3. Definitive, glaring proof of Byuu faking his own suicide surfaces, outlets spin this somehow as being a "heroic" and justified ploy


----------



## PhoBingas (Dec 21, 2022)

Three predictions for the card:
1) Vickers will catch charges for something. It may and or may not be related to Ralph
2) Warski gets some powdered boxed wine cut with too much fent and kicks the bucket
3) Ralph leaves meigh for keffals since they both enjoy bodily functions and children.


----------



## I'mma real anime gurl (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Nick and Ye campaign will be remembered as a failure and causes both to be a laughingstock to everyone.
2. Ralph convinced Meigh to let cartel members use her baby as a whore, Meigh's dad will reboot America's most wanted as a result.
3. Baked will become a expert in deradicalization and claim that he's a victim. Cue another macing scandal.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. China collapses and MSM will claim to knew it would happen while shilling Charities linked to the CCP.
2. OnlyusemeBlade becomes a nugget and prays that his dick won't go next.
3. Shadman kills himself after a manic episode.
4. Yandere Simulator will still be in development.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Keffals gets assulted by a PoC and somehow will trigger hate crime shit.
2. Wings gets divorced, streams become infrequent and sadder.
3. America balkanizes 
4. Tranch mass suicide after the property is declined, Kevin survives and will continue doing the same shit
5. Amy Ramadan or Chantel will get a TLC show, Youtubers forced to be extra careful.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Onison will join the Anticar groups and will become a prominent voice in the community.
2. The Rock will have sexual assault come up however he'll deflect it by coming out as bisexual.
3. China becomes cyberpunk with a coalition of Tencent and Chinese companies ousting the CCP, Naomi Wu will be spokeswoman of Cyberpunk China.
4. Tommy Tooter and Chris Chan Marriage.
5. Metokur will be found out as George Soro's bastard son.
6. First Ai produced episode of the Simpsons will be successful.


----------



## #KillAllPedos (Dec 21, 2022)

Likely: Harry Morris has Ralph tortured to death by a cartel hit squad


----------



## Vecr (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1: Ralph gets beat up, yet again
2: Chris is moved to a shared living facility
3: Goodbye Volcano High is not released

*Additional Predictions:

Less-Likely:*

1: Sustained human-to-human transmission of CRIMEAN-CONGO HEMORRHAGIC FEVER virus or derived/related virus occurs.
2: Belarus resists with force the Russian attempts to get them to fight Ukraine
3: Current site of the Tranch is purchased by someone who makes videos/a documentary about the state of the site


----------



## WhimsicalTrolli (Dec 21, 2022)

My parodies got platinum.


----------



## Illuminati Order Official (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Null wins his lolsuits against Melinda Scott and Russel Greer. Coping and seething ensues.
2. Some time in the summer of 2023 some minor happening leads to another crusade against the Farms. After a lot of doomposting and outages the forum prevails. Coping, seething and memoryholing ensues.
3. One of Kiwi Farms users is doxed as a high-profile individual.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*
1. Ethan Ralph gets severely beaten or suffers a stroke or a heart attack. Declining health puts the future of his streaming career into question.
2. Russian-Ukrainian war ends. Resolution doesn't satisfy anybody. Situation remains tense.
3. Keffals continues his descent into obscurity. Attempts to reignite interest in his content are unsuccessful. By the end of this year only the most dedicated followers on KF pay attention to him and he bitterly embraces this audience.

*Less-Likely:*
1. Vordrak's actions catch up to him. Loses his house after a lost defamation lawsuits or is accused of sexual assault.
2. First rumors about a new pandemic start circulating some time in the late 2023.
3. Yandere Simulator is released to middling critical and commercial success.

*Wtf, lol?*
1. After being banned from KiwiFarms Pamela Swain starts taking her meds and begins therapy which is surprisingly successful. Urged by her therapist she's working on a book: a thriller partially based on her delusions. Her book becomes a hit and by the end of 2023 lands on The New York Times Best Seller list.
2. @MerriedxReldnahc's animated short "Mr Woggle-Bug Learns to Say No to Drugs" is featured during a film festival and becomes a surprise hit, igniting interest in Wogglebug. Thousands of ironic and unironic fans rush to get their DVD's and plushies from @WogglebugLover's online store. Wogglebug becomes a household name. By the end of 2023 she's a multimillionaire. She's still not allowed to leave her house without supervision.
3. Dana Cain's theological lectures attract more and more people. Soon a cult of Dana-worshipers is formed. First small but it grows fast and soon you can hear a Cainite preaching the message of Dana Cain on every street corner. Dana remains an insufferable bitch and in the end her cultists offer her as a bloody sacrifice to herself.


----------



## General Emílio Médici (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. KiwiFarms is blamed for a mass shooting
2. Joshua Moon is targeted for assasination by a troon (attempt fails hilariously)
3. EU Unveils biggest internet censorship campaign yet


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. A Disney higher up is caught with CP
2. Brazilian goes into massive dive by the end of the year with 50%+ inflation
3. Joe Biden dies in office from being mega old, natural causes

*Less-Likely:*

1. Nick Fuentes sued by someone who really isn't any better than him on the other side of the political aisle a là Alex Jones vs. Sandy Hook Parents
2. Large revolt in PRC results in Tianamen 2 Electrict Boogaloo
3. Great Depression 2 The Return 


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Jared Kushner is made Twitter CEO by Musk
2. Putin does a little trolling (Tactical Nuke)
3. Coup in Brazil


----------



## reptile baht spaniard rid (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Null testifies before Congress
2. Fatrick gets hounded of Twitter and deletes his account (or gets banned)
3. The Tranch homeless arc begins


----------



## Muppetstudios (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Jim dies
2. Keffals gets arrested for grooming
3. Nick Rekieta divorces his wife


----------



## Reotardo da Vinci (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ethan Ralph goes to jail.
2. Metokur dies.
3. Keffals pulls a 41%


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Boogie dies.
2. Jack Scalfani suffers a fifth stroke, resulting in loss of speech and only being able to eat mashed potato. Channel dies.
3. PPP has a cardiac incident.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Dick Masterson drops his gunt guard.
2. DSP support dries up to a hilarious standstill.
3. Chris Chan sent to federal buttfuck drop-a-microwave-on-your-head prison.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Ethan Ralph takes his child-horse-bride on their honeymoon/first ever actual holiday together. Through this experience, it turns out they fucking hate each other and they get divorced by next No-Ralph November.
2. Nick Fuentes gets his shit pushed in by ethnics.
3. More degeneracy from Nick Rekieta is revealed, the world copes.


----------



## IKOL (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Eunuch Brick-Jaw and co. would likely try another  round 665 and will fail miserably.
2. We'll get the Civil War. Either in some less-than-significant EU country, Third World Bumfuck-Nowhere, Give-a-Fucktopia, or...
3. I'll live another year with no prospect for good future.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. YE will get Canada's medicare'd (to put it bluntly, euthanised) and media will cover that as either mental breakdown or he have killed himself due to his skitzohitlering
2. Nick Fuentes gets caughts being the shota-master (diddling underage boys)
3. DropKiwiFarms movement will be put on hold to never return, John Dimidriadis will make a proposal to lucas and get BTFO.
4. Tommy Tooter will soil himself 187 times. At just first half of the year alone.
5. Atomic Heart (that's new slavjunk from Russia. Russian Bioshock, lol) turns out to be as bad as Cyberpunk2077.
6. We will not witness S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 2 at all.
7. Pedo Joe will get a heart attack which will lead in him resign from the POTUS position, either kamala harriss, jen psaki or AOC (please no...) will replace him.
etc.

*Less-Likely:*

1. War in Ukraine will end close to late summer\early fall, Ukraine will lose no matter who'll get to be a real winner there.
2.Chris SOMEHOW will get off from jail, re-assign back to be male, gets his shit together, become a (relatively) normal person under new name. Mucracha Dundaloo to the rescue, bitches.
3. Serious improvements, achievements in cybertechnology and prosthetic manufacturing, first people with artificial limbs connected to brain activity via natural-to-artificial nerves bond, prosthetics will feel like the proper continuation of the human body, as if they never have lost a limb.
4. Start of Moon\Mars colonisation mission.
5. Elon Musk will make Twitter Greater Than Ever, platform will finally start to make profits.
6. Nvidia will stop doing shit, RTX conveyor will stop for at least 5 years for prepare new perspective platform.
7. Byuu will reveal he's alive, but unlike keffals, have been really hiding... from the troons.
8. People will finally woke up and start fighting against troonery, queer shite, pedos, zoos, etc.
9. ryu289 will come back to forum for get roasted for his pedo tendencies. again.
10. I'll leave Russia.
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Null will troon out, become president of Albania
2. Whole planet will turn into cheese
2.3. CHEESE, I SAY!!!!
2.4. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT 2.1 AND 2.2., FUCK YOU
3.. CatParty will come back.
4. Lowtax revived. Eternal ZombieTax, everyone?
5. Mario Movie will introduce Bowsette as well.
6. Horny aliens thirsty for fucking with other species will visit our planet, everyone will get his own specimen to fuck.
7. Alex Jones immigrate to Belorussia... or Mongolia.
8. Hitler had a son, and he's about to make Deutchland Uber Alles once again.
9. Leftists will learn what condom is.


----------



## A Sentient Cloud (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Deborah Reyes dies of anorexia related illness.
2. Bam Margera dies of alcoholism related illness.
3. Kanye commits suicide.

*Additional Predictions:

 Likely:*
1. CWC pleads out and walks free with limitations. The saga continues.
2. Britney Spears (not a lolcow officially, but should be) continues to spiral, her husband eventually filing for divorce.
3. At  least one of the Rod children flees the reservation.

*Less-Likely:*
1. Princess Aiko of Japan follows her sister in ditching the royal family. She accepts the $1.3 million in severance, though.
2. [insert extremely famous troon here] becomes a detransitioner. My money is on Lia Thomas but I think there are more to come.
3. Sam Brinton goes alt-right.


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Dec 21, 2022)

*My Three Submissions for Card:*

1) Dylan Mulveny (sp) will regret getting bottom surgery (especially all the work that goes into it) and will detrans or worse.
2) Chris-Chan will be found guilty.
3) Boogie dies.


----------



## Vulcanusii (Dec 21, 2022)

> *Up to Three Submissions for Card:*


1. Covid-19 2: Electric Boogaloo
2. Chris Chan is institutionalized
3. Keffals tries to be relevant again

Additional Predictions:


> *Likely:*


1. New Minecraft pedo is revealed
2. Assassination attempt on an AI art developer by a disgruntled artist (bonus points if it's a they/them)
3. The Rock is arrested for something money related




> *Less-Likely:*


1. Kanye shoots someone or himself or both
2. Keffals or one of his orbiters fakes suicide to pin it on the farms
3. The Merge happens


----------



## grody_gunt65 (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Kanye West has a drug fueled mental breakdown in public
2. Jim dies
3. Ethan Ralph breaks up with Mantsu


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Ralph gets beaten up again
2. Chris is released onto the street
3. PutridPestilentPig and Andy Pedobortsky break up spectacularly


*Less-Likely:*

1. Nick goes to prison for tax fraud
2. Trandy Retardski tranny sex tape leaked
3. PhatPorcinePustule dies of a heart attack


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Kanye on Killstream
2. Ralph murdered by cartel
3. Nick Fuentes gay sex tape with Jaden leaked


----------



## damian (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph will get yet another baby mamma (hispanic)
2. Milo releases the black book on Nick Fuentes and AF
3. At least 3 more AF members picked up by the feds

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Ralph has liver/kidney failure
2. Pantsu gets caught with CP
3. Ralph gets into another white trash brawl


*Less-Likely:*

1. Ralph quits drinking and put effort into becoming a good father to his children
2. Nick settles down with a twink he groomed and sells Cozy.tv
3. Baked Alaska becomes muslim while in prison

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Nick reveals he was the fed all along and Baked was just his scapegoat
2. PPP and Andy adopt a baby, name it something that rhymes with Kino or Casino
3. Chris Chan starts his own cult in prison


----------



## Computer Guardian (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph trying to become a part of YE24 like Nick Fuentes
2. Liz Fong-Jones or Keffals attempting to reboot DropKiwiFarms in some way.
3. byuu proven to have faked his suicide again.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Chris-Chan's trial gets extended again.
2. Metokur dies, kickstarting the Battle at Jim's Funeral if the Funeral location is made public.
3. Record number of newfags tracked in the Easy to Track Username Hall of Shame within a year.
4. Boogie2988 pulling an unsucessful scam.
5. Another virus that's declared "Worse than Covid and Niggerpox".
6. Some gay shit involving a Nintendo DMCA or a Smash Tournement.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Nobody takes up Elon Musk's offer for CEO. 
2. Disney pushing out more Box Office flops like Lightyear and Avatar 2
3. Null releases SneedForo 2024

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Dick Masterson and Vito get jailed for child porn 
2. Keffals becomes a True and Honnest Kiwi Farms User
3. nigger/LGBT/retard fatigue finally sets in in America.
etc.


----------



## Pyohato (Dec 21, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Byuu is confirmed alive
2. Ethan Ralph falls off his chair and his head will exactly hit his desk causing him to have a brain hemorrhage and die. Maybe too complex but I think he'll drop dead.
3. Kanye is sent to prison/jail


----------



## GeorgeHWBush (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Chris Chan is finally placed in an institution.
2. Ralpha-baby #2 is announced and May remains unmarried for the remainder of the year.
3. Joe Biden will have a major health scare (mentally or physically).


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Jim dies late in the year leaving Null as Supreme e-Daddy of the lower-case “i” internet.
2. Kanye West will renounce his current views on the Jews, will go dethcon 3 on the Irish instead.
3. Ralph diabeetus saga begins.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Null learns to lift.
2. Nick Rekieta takes a long break from the Internet to spend more time with his wife and children.
3. Boogie makes all of his money back through onlyfans, but it costs him his soul.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Xi Jinping consent-accident.
2. Chantal suicide bombs a KFC (Inshallah).
3. Alex Jones drops his crazy persona overnight and pretends nothing has ever been different, baffling everyone including the Infowars staff.


----------



## karz (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Daddy Jim kicks the bucket 
2. Ralph (somehow) impregnates another woman with his bastard child 
3. Nick Fuentes is confirmed to have had sex with CatboyKami


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Ralph gets his ass beat while abroad, again.
2. Idubbbz gets his ass flattened the next time he boxes, again. Also goes below 700k subs.
3. h3h3 / Ethan Klein continues to get fatter and develops health conditions of some kind from his very sedentary lifestyle of nothing but running his greasy mouth.
4. Dylan Mulvaney will continue the grift routine of being a girl, but still won't be kissed in a dress.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Liz Dong-Gone commits another "consent accident."
2. Byuu comes back to the internet after faking his death.
3. We finally get an FTM lolcow that's really interesting to watch. (Really hoping at least one of my personal FTM lolcows breaks this glass ceiling, but none of them have done anything significant or noteworthy yet other than cosplaying characters)
4. Kanye goes broke and loses the rest of his fame, becoming a regular on America First and InfoWars to shill for the catboy ranch and testosterone pills laced with lead.
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Andy finds a cute girl and marries her in a few years; PPP follows suit.
2. FTX goes to a criminal trial, and Bankman-Fried is given less than 5 years in prison for cooperation with prosecutors.
3. I become the new CEO of Twitter


----------



## A Logging Company (Dec 22, 2022)

*FOR THE CARD*

Pillstream
Ralph goes viral outside the confines of the sektur (example: his roadrage incident showing up on that dashcam channel that got millions of views)
Allies with previously sworn enemy
*OTHER PREDICTIONS IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, RELEVANCY, OR LIKELYHOOD*

Drexil 100% confirmed to be having sex with Nick's wife with his knowing and consent
Kino Casino is retired, but no hard beef between Warski and Ashton
PPP focuses on grifting on this "Kino Cathedral" channel
Warski starts a new grift with moderate success

Ralph dies
The ongoing attacks/deplatforming of this site will go semi or full mainstream
potential Musk mention
potential Tucker segment

Chris is sentenced to live in a mental facility or home
Jim finally dies, everyone is very sad, many streamers and e-celebs of all levels of notoriety do memorial streams and say how "the older internet really is gone ;_; RIP in peace Mr. Metalcore o7 "
The Ye campaign will continue, having spurts of activity and hilarity here and there, and somehow be a viable candidate for the 2024 Election (and by "viable" I mean being on the ballot in most US states)
Optional: He achieves this by cannibalizing the Constitution Party much like Sargon and gang did with UKIP

One of the big name cringe talk show hosts in the US is going to go through a major scandal that will kill their show.
The Ukraine-Russia war will somehow resolve with...
Russia taking some clay, in addition to Ukraine recognizing its claims to Crimea
Russia paying restitution in the form of purchasing claimed clay (including Crimea)
Somesort of agreement on how to handle resource extraction in the Black Sea
Ukraine being allowed to join whatever military or economic bloc it wants
Both sides will claim victory, but it will be a Russian defeat due to causing a more robust NATO and forever losing Ukraine to The West.

China's economy breaks due to Xi's retarded Mao nostalgia and background Taiwanese glowie shenanigans
Being able to wear BDSM/kink stuff to work will become a culture issue in the US.


----------



## Flour (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Kevin Gibes gets his amhole upgrade and promptly fails to dilate until it seals shut again. 
2. Rhys McKinnon gives up on his cycling career and joins the fat acceptance movement.
3. Kanye produces an album for Nick Fuentes (feat. Kim Petras) to mixed critical acclaim.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. All of the alpacas freeze death on the Tranch except one who gets adopted by the elusive Earl.
2. Ethan Ralph gets punched trice by three weens dressed up as corncobs. 
3. Elon Musk sells twitter to Donald Trump. 

*Less-Likely:*

1. Null gains some weight and marries a lolcow from the Beauty Parlor. She cooks great meals for him and MATI is now about mukbangs. 
2. Contrapoints detroons quietly. 
3. Keffals goes on holiday in Spain with his grift money and manages to find a human who is really into hunchbacks. 
etc.


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Chris Chan has sex with a willing participant. 
2. Jack Scalfani manages to get a job as a professional chef at Le Bernadin. 
3. Byuu comes back from the dead and joins the  Kiwi cause against the censorious troons.


----------



## Apex Ralphamale (Dec 22, 2022)

So the weirdest thing happened today. I was making this long-winded post with extremely specific predictions for 2023, hit the post button and it simply reloaded the page with nothing happening. And me subsequently not being able to access the site. Turns out after checking telegram that the last tier 1 ISP started blackholing KF in the exact moment that I tried posting. It gave me a serious schizo moment, like I somehow caused a mandela timeline shift. 

I luckily still have a copy of the post. 



2023 will be the Year of the Sped, where everything gets even more ridiculous than 2022.


For the card


Ralph's fight with May's sister becomes a big, recorded showdown between him and all of the Morrises, ending in some spectacular way, possibly culminating with him and Matt Vickers suffering from simultaneous heart attacks in the middle of a physical altercation.
Nick Fuentes makes a complete break from the persona we know. One of two scenarios will follow here.
He will attend a gay orgy and become an open faggot with rainbow clothing and neon hair who carries a dildo everywhere he goes.
He will get a girlfriend for a brief time, finally overcome his fear of being vulnerable around women and discover that he was straight all along. Then all his femsimps come out of the woodwork and make him the straightest man alive.

Nick Rekieta will drift away from the foids on that locals website and miraculously gravitate away from all the degenerate shit. His growing opposition to sodomite perversion will drive a wedge between him and his wife. In the end, she is so invested in whatever fetishistic excesses defined their lives previously that she will agree to move out so she can be with whoever else is more okay with the hedonis2 shit, leaving Nick with the kids and the house. 


And for other predictions, 


In the aftermath of Ralph's death, it will turn out that there is a religious cult that worshiped Ethan Ralph and whose prayers are what kept him alive and out of jail for as long as it lasted. He will have a funeral and that is when the cult makes its first appearance. The Ralph subforum will continue to exist, with new threads documenting the members of the cult and their antics. One member of it will be a former IP2 member.
One of KingCobraJFS' trolls will tell him the sad story of Jim's impending death. KC will swing his wand and cast a magic spell to cure Jim. To the confusion of all of Jim's doctors, Jim makes a sudden recovery after KingCobra has blessed him.
Lucas Roberts will be eaten alive by his fellow troons who are all still salty over how much money he got to make off of other people's work. In the end, he will make a KiwiFarms account and become one of the most prolific users in the stinkditch subforum, contacting the families and nearby law enforcement of every tranny that has an active thread.
Chantal's Syrian husband will get a payraise of some kind and Chantal will drift into obscurity because she no longer needs the youtube/onlyfans money and live an uneventful life as an islamic convert.
Kim will escalate shit with Kanye (something extreme like murdering one of his kids), causing another manic episode in Kanye which leads to him doubling down on the anti-jew crusade. He will run as an independent in the US general election and he will assemble a cadre of /pol/acks who feed him increasingly over-the-top lines about jews and other minorities. It will reach its peak when all candidates are invited to a live debate on CNN and Kanye shows up in a nazi uniform with a fake hitler mustache. 
Godwinson will act as the common enemy that reunites Andy and PPP. They revive the Kino Casino and replace their advisors and other staff/production team and mods with people Godwinson has previously railed against or made fun of, including but not limited to Dick Masterson, flamenco, the council of retards and a brief 4-week period where Ethan Ralph cohosts on every show.


----------



## whothefuck (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Chris is sentenced, gets reduced time for being held for a year + autism.
2. The Tranch dissolves into a twitter shitflinging competition and is abandoned.
3. Dylan Mulvaney gets more surgery, including fake tits.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Kanye claims he survived an assassination on some podcast.
2. The Farms is attacked again and goes down for a while.
3. Keffals get embroiled in drama/sex scandal. Loses defenders but has people go ballistic defending him.
4. Joe Biden dies, Kamala Harris serves as president for a few months before stepping down.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Goddess Logs are released to the public.
2. In run up to Pride 2023 conservative states and countries start restricting events, alphabet crew tries to go George Floyd.
3. Sam Hyde and Hasan Piker fight in the ring. Ian seethes over his event being overshadowed.
4. Election in the UK- Starmer wins and tries to rejoin the EU.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Glowies arrest Null in Serbia, Farms taken down permenantly.
2. WW3 finally happens.
3. The dimensional merge finally happens.
4. I have sex.


----------



## Laburnum (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph goes to jail
2. Kino casino splits in the most autistic way possible
3. Baked gets beat up in prison


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. More groypers are sold out to the feds
2. Kanye's 2024 campaign collapses in on itself 
3. Ralph's reckless driving sees him get involved in a hit-and-run


*Less-Likely:*

1. Rags or Jay split from the efap podcast
2. Moviebob dies
3. Keffals commits suicide 


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Sargon runs for office again
2. Tranch gets raided
3. Yandere Simulator is released


----------



## The Ideal AutoModerator (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. KingCobraJFS is hospitalized
2. KingCobraJFS moves out of his apartment
3. Ethan Klein is caught cheating on his wife.


----------



## かうぼーい (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card
1  ethan ralph dies
2 poast is dropped from host
3 a shooter uses kiwifarms to publish his manifesto resulting in josh self hosting the site

Additional Predictions:

likely

1 dick masterson breaks up with ralph
2 ralphamania gets swatted
3 patrick tomlinson gets swatted again
4 boogie1488 dies


less likely

1 i stream.me like streaming service comes along sector streams there
2 keffals turns on the trans community and joins the tranch
 3 gator citing collage exits the sector
 4 mister metokur dies jade eats the family dog

Wtf, lol?
1 josh moon has sex with elaine miller
2 onionfarms over takes kiwifarms
3 chris excapes jail*


----------



## Waifu Days (Dec 22, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. The Gunt and the Mare with not wed in 2023. 
2. Chantal's "marriage" to Salah will no longer be a thing and they with go separate ways.
3. Boogie will pass away. RIP.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. PPP will be arrested by local police for a minor infraction.
2. Ralph will impregnant another woman, not the horse.
3. Dick Masterson will call bestiality "based". 

*Less-Likely:*

1. Amberlynn Reid will lose weight. 
2. MovieBob using his Mastodon account. 
3. Yaniv does anything interesting.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Candid video of Rekieta's wife in a furry suit will be discovered. 
2. Troons on mass will start to detransition in mass, learn nothing, and latch on to some other autistic cause.
3. EZ PZ and Null reboot Mad at the Internet, cohosting. Jersh will become a Zionist during this endeavor.


----------



## Cat Phuckers (Dec 23, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. SparxTraxx will commit suicide and will blame society for not accepting him and the Farms for mocking him while also smugly declaring how he just "wuvs to be h8'd by twansphobes uwu".
2. May will get hooked on hard drugs to cope with the spite-marriage, which will go through, and her health will noticably decline in photos.
3. Fredrick Brennan will die from his condition and the the effects of drug abuse, and his last post on Twitter will be yet another pornographic drawing of his furfag OC attached to an anti-Jim Watkins rant.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Kweefing Kween Kuh'ffals (YWNBAW) will go on some unhinged anti-KF rant on Twitch to try and rally support again, but will only recieve superficial/performative support, causing him to suicide-bait into the void and then retire from all social media except whatever Twitter clone he will live on.
2. Rozanne the "Ralphababy" will end up in a Mexican hospital for several days with some severe neglect-related illness and be taken into Mexican foster care by the government upon recovery, leaving Ralph and May childless.
3. Katzunuwu will commit suicide when she realizes she will never be anything more than an ugly fake manlet, and her spiral into insanity will be blamed on the Farms rather than her brain injury.

Less-Likely:

1. KhordKitty will be prosecuted for his crimes.
2. Warski will do coke on stream again and actually admit to it, leaving the internet for a number of months to a drug rehab clinic.
3. Sappho will leave the internet and seek help instead of constantly embarassing himself and self-owning online.

Wtf, lol?

1. Josh will find beautiful Albanian tradwife and have many Aryan mutt-babies with her.
2. Elon will tweet #GamerGate3 and save the West.
3. Shmorky will come back online, publicly endorse the Shmorky NFT scheme, and will begin to make original Klurf drawings for sale a la Chris Chan.


----------



## Bubble Ba'ath (Dec 23, 2022)

Gunt, having failed to close the deal with his dream girl Kiwi-cancelling Keffals, will pivot to attempting to court Liz Fong Jones for the same reasons.


----------



## Troonos (Dec 24, 2022)

Bloody revolution.

More of a hope than a prediction.


----------



## IamnottheNSA (Dec 25, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. New Ralphamale nudes will leak
2. Ralph will drop Mantsu
3. This website will survive the year

*Additional Predictions:*

*Likely:*
1. Jim will live for at least a few more years, but won't be able to keep a consistent streaming schedule, only occasionally popping up when something completely unusual happens
2. Nicky Rackets will continue to go down the dangerous path he is threading now
3. YID2024 would completely burn out before 2024

*Less-Likely:*
1. We will get a video of Ralph getting cut to pieces by Mexican cartel goons
2. Fag-Jones joins the 41%
3. Jim's CancerAIDS will be cured

*Wtf, lol?*
1. Catboy Supreme will come out of the closet
2. Ralph will reconcile with his internet father
3. Tranny menace would stop fucking with this website


----------



## Takayuki Yagami (Dec 26, 2022)

1. He does something fucked up and has to flee Mexico and go back to the US.
2. He has some kind of health crisis on stream due to his obesity, alcoholism, and being on all of the drugs.
3. Meigh runs for the hills for some reason or another.


----------



## Yet Another Wanker (Dec 26, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Jim Dies
2. PPP does a Pillstream
3. Ralph has a really good year and punts the gunt

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*
1. Rossoto does a bad sex tape with his MN micro
2. The Kino Casino burns down
3. Warski does more lines of boxed wine
4. Baked Alaska gets released from jail gets a tear drop tattoo
5. The Ballad of Mr Metokur part 2 drops
6. De Santis becomes the new Republican darling 2024 becomes the new 2015
7. Twitter implodes after Elon Musk finds out Conservative boomers are retards but still won’t buy his shitty cars

*Less-Likely:*

1. The farms gets hacked mass IP doxing and we all get canceled into homelessness
2. We get to see Hunter Biden’s cock loads of right wing Christian Nationalist cream their pants on mass at a gay orgy to celebrate

*Wtf, lol?*
1. The Nick Fueentes gets laid  AF ends
2. Matt Walsh gets caught in a CP ring
3. Trump sex tape drops
4. Sargon becomes relevant again
5. Britain devolves into anarchy after Rishi Sunak prays to the wrong 7 headed elephant god Boris returns to become King of England


----------



## Mister Mint (Dec 27, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. RIP *Metokur*
2. *Jim Sterling* reaches 800k and does another salty stream solely blaming his trans identity and not the fact that he's been riding a lazy revolving door of the same 3 topics for more than a decade.
3. *Boogie *claims a Q+ identity for clout and ebegging purposes (leaning toward non-binary or demisexual, he leeches off it for a week to a month, then never mentions it again and actively contradicts it soon after)

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. *Chantal *dies by getting too much blood in her gravy system
2. The internet's cancer is terminal and *KiwiFarms *as we know it dies as a result
3. *Ralph *finally burns bridges with *Dick

Less-Likely:*

1. *Acerthorn *joins the farms, attempts a RULES OF NATURE, but is nothing but threatening in his request and is voted down in a landslide. Sues the farms for multi millions as a result.
2. *Pantsu *leaves Ralph for greener pastures
3. *Byuu *is found, news outlets and wikipedia all decide to look the other way
4. *Gunt *is discovered to be trying to get Nora to let him leave Pantsu for her.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. *Chris chan* is released and, as he will see it preferable to actual work, will agree to a Perry Caravello-style hell life as a live-in pet retard for a ween youtuber/twitch streamer so that he can be pranked and streamed 24/7.
2. *Boogie's* OnlyFans becomes an ironic success and he starts putting out dirty HAMS content.
3. *Rekieta *joins the above content along with his wife
4. As a contingency plan to the above failing, *Boogie *becomes a vtuber.

I'm realizing now this is in the gunt subforum so this should probably all be gunt-related but fuck you, I'm not re-writing this.


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## Mr. Manchester (Dec 27, 2022)

Final last minute prediction: Rozy's first word will be bitch.

That is all.


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## Lidl Drip (Dec 27, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph's health will rapidly decline, either another heart attack or a stroke, he will be left with a permanent disability and require 24/7 care from some poor latinx. 
2. Ralph will attempt to impregnate Meigh again but without success. He will then pay his poor latinx caretaker to form a throuple with Meigh and him and have his child. 
3. Ralph will get beat up by the latinxes older brothers after she tells them about his unsavory proposition and he is left even more crippled. They will also take grandpappys ring.


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## Fortyone (Dec 27, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Mantsu and Ralph split and we enter a new golden age of ayylawgin. Really hope this one happens, it would be a very nasty and public breakup and it could very well end in ralph being imprisoned. 
2. Jim fucking dies, Ralph and Nick celebrate like the subhumans they are and don't reminisce on the good times or when jim started their careers at all. 
3. Further collaboration between the troons and AF in order to spite the farms. Groypers begin their own ddosing and letter writing campaign.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Andy and Ashton break up, ugly divorce that leaves PPP homeless. Ppp will either quit after this or continue streaming to a much smaller audience.
2. The sektur fragments further after Jim's death and begins to drift apart, no one has the charisma or popularity to replace jim and the swarm of nobody ecelebs vying for his place are all faggots with no reach.
3. Further online censorship approaching the 2024 election 

Less-Likely:

1. Nick and Kanye the schizophrenic nigger have an ugly breakup and start shitting on each other. This would be like when jim shit on Ralph during their "debate" and would leave Nick heartbroken and lost 
2. Out of desperation PPP and Ashton move back in together, it ends in disaster

Wtf, lol?

1. Trump is on track to win republican primaries again, begins attacking Nick heavily and destroys his career
2. Nick not only comes out as gay but becomes a troon 
3. Ralph forgives Jim and others and apologizes to his audience for his behavior, improves his life and quits drugs, becomes a solid host of a growing online show that everyone loves, gator and zidan come back


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## True Gunt Radio (Dec 27, 2022)

1. The gunt goes back to Portugal and gets beaten in the streets a 3rd time
2. The gunt loses a foot to diabeetus (and the other to Vickers)
3. The gunt goes to a prison in mexico


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## Beavis (Dec 27, 2022)

1. Ralph cancels/postpones Ralphamania to avoid being served.

2. Pantsu leaves Ralph and does a tell all interview with null.

3. Ralph accidentally ODs or gets in a fatal car wreck.


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## Odogaron_big_red_dog (Dec 27, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Dong gone Jones commits an hero after their efforts to kill this site fails, again.
2. Ethan Ralph gets drunk on Mexican liquor and doxes himself and likely a few hookers nearby.
3. Meigh gets pimped out and the Ralpha male plays off his cuckoldry as some alpha male shit.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Metokur will sadly pass away from cancer in April.
2. Nick Fuentes sells cozy, but all his clips will be used to tormet and humiliate him throughout the year.
3. Jim dying and cozy being sold, Ethan Ralph has a stress heart attack and dies, exactly a month after the reality of both events.
etc.

Less-Likely:

1. Metokur has a surprise comeback, cancer in remission and he has an amazing kickass few years ahead of him.
2. Joshua Conner Moon is subpoenaed to the state of Virginia to testify for or against Christian Weston Chandler.
3. Ethan Ralph acknowledges his problems and starts to be proactive and try to be a good father.
etc.

Wtf, lol?

1. Kanye West somehow defies the odds and becomes the lead Republican nominee, securing his place as POTUS.
2. Chantal becomes a martyr for Allah, the chunks from her ascension go for miles. Some of the chunks are renowned for their curated flavors and aromas, seasoned over decades.
3. Ethan Klein actually commits an act of terrorism, tries to play it off as a joke. Somehow, it works.


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## Gunt Grease (Dec 28, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Keffals is exposed for gooming with proof so undeniable even the gash-suckers will have to admit it. Ditchhole Darkies will crow that they saw this coming since "muh racism", the rest wil claim this is a targeted attack because "muh transphobia" claims and memory hole it

2. Chin Fong will continue antics, the Farms will have significant down time ( a week atleast )

3. Major death fat dies.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Chantal is ghosted by Salad.
2. Peetz + Chantal are forced to move
3. BbJ dies
4. Luna Buna dies
5.  Mama Luna fetus commits seppuku to avoid disgrace capture in her snatch

Wtf, lol?

1. Anna loses a significant amount of weight
2. Corissa + J get married
3. Jershy gets interviewed on live TV about internet censorship


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## Pissmaster (Dec 29, 2022)

Rumors of Paris Hilton running for president will start emerging
Dick Masterson changes absolutely nothing at all about his shows; continues to defend pedophiles
Boogie gets hospitalized, but won't pass away this year


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## Miguel Sanchez (Dec 29, 2022)

Knock up a Mexican Women


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## ZheZuoShan (Dec 29, 2022)

Ralph and Faith will get back together.


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## AnIntrepidCrow (Dec 29, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph genuinely cries like a woman during the end of Titanic when Jim dies, in a live reaction on The Killstream.
2. Liz Fong Jones is hospitalized due to a stress related medical issue as their retard crusade against the farms goes out with a whimper.
3. Kanye West is forcibly committed to a mental institution.


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Yaniv dies in an autoerotic asphyxiation accident.
2. Chantal gets divorced and gains another 100 pounds stress eating.
3. Matthew Vickers fucks up another twenty lawsuits and copes about it on twitter instead of fixing his shitty family.

*Less-Likely:*

1. The Kiwi Farms gets mentioned on Tucker Carlson, causing another Pillstream and untold amounts of Kino Casino butthurt.
2. Spoony, in spite of himself, pulls himself out of the sewer of irrelevancy and gets a brief taste of his past glory... until he starts dating another retarded twitter liberal.
3. Josh releases his own pizza recipe book, which goes on to top The New York Times best seller list.


*Wtf, lol?*

1. Jim Sterling destransitions and becomes the second chair of the Kino Casino.
2. Sam Bankman Fried is publicly assassinated by a 4 chan crypto bro.
3.Nick Fuentes fulfills his lifelong dream to march in the San Francisco Pride Parade.


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## zyclonPD (Dec 29, 2022)

The Zyclon Prediction:
1. Ralph will do something stupid that get him banned on Twitter.
2. Ralph will holler louder than he ever has before.
3. Ralph will have a near death experience after pissing someone else off and will make the Portugal beat down look tame in comparison.


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## 56 others (Dec 29, 2022)

Ethan returns to the US, has to face the consequences for the civil suit, and "magically" walks away with a slap on the wrist.


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## AMHOLIO (Dec 29, 2022)

I just hope he does a literal flip: not that he kills himself, no, I'm hoping he flips his body over somehow.  It would just be funny.


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## Research Purposes Mostly (Dec 29, 2022)

1. Ralph will not see Xander (Bonus: It will be all his fault!)
2. Harry Morris will do a podcast episode with Vickers
3. Ralphamania will not live up to the hype and we will all be immensely disappointed.


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## disavow (Dec 29, 2022)

1. Ralph survives, big Josh L.
2. Ralph vs Dick Masterson
3. cozy.tv dies


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## ICanLurkNoMore (Dec 30, 2022)

1. another alphabet fellow martyrs themselves and we get the blame.
2. drachenlord's documentary is released and is actually pretty good.
3. big important troons finally actually get arrested and convicted of their crimes. but get sent to women's prisons...


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## Amin Yamumm (Dec 30, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Dylan Mulvaney suffers post op complications and his sponsors drop him/her/it immediately.

2. Lolcow Hollie Dance is jailed in the UK for GBH with intent.

3. The Russia/Ukraine war rumbles on for the whole year.


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## Your Favorite New Friend (Dec 30, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Ralph is literally murdered by a Mexican or Mexicans
2. More than one new feud per month until his death
3. Armando Leon Morris stays with Ralph until his death


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Toilet time for Ralph's mom (Never confirmed explicitly because this is a felony. Oops! She must have hitchhiked away.)
2. Ralphamania implodes completely before it starts
3. Ralph gets AIDS from the only black hooker in Merida

*Less-Likely:*

1. Cozy Rozy ends up in a Mexican orphanage
2. Mexican heritage or Mexican nationalization becomes a requirement for America Mexico First membership.
3. Jim is miraculously cured because God also enjoys a laugh

*Wtf, lol?*

1.  Everyone spontaneously agrees that the whole gender/gay thing was a mistake. Former transsexuals the world over tearfully apologize to Null and use their contacts in big tech to popularize Kiwi Farms and make useful code contributions to SneedForo. Null becomes a billionaire overnight but refuses to sacrifice children to Moloch so parentheses people make him poor overnight.
2. Chris is released on the condition that he travels to Merida and saves elderly Mexican women from being raped by Ralph.
3. Ralph meets his son before his death


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## Weeb Slinger (Dec 30, 2022)

1. The attendees at Ralphamania are outnumbered by those who have come to serve legal papers or to fuck with the host. The entire event degenerates into a shitshow with outbreaks of violence and possible arrests. Ralph flees for the border. There is an outside chance that the event goes ahead with Ralph in attendance as a tele-presence.

2. Ralph is incapacitated, either as a result of a heart attack or a stroke.

3. The pedo horse breaks free from her concrete pen, only to hook-up with someone even more degenerate than her two previous boyfriends, possibly a low-level cartel enforcer.


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## Butwhythough2 (Dec 30, 2022)

My one and only prediction for 2023

1. Ralph will still be fat, and I still would not have sex with him.


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## Duke-Diggler (Dec 30, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*
1: Ralph makes further ass of himself during Ralphamania, gets punched in the face and panels leave.
2: More people are aware of Nick Fuentes's degenerate behavior, normies laugh at Nick hunting for cum
3: No Dong Fong Jones enters into a random stream, someone mentions something about a "consent accident", Elliot rages and causes a massive downward spiral of epic lolcowdom.


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## TheSockiestSock (Dec 30, 2022)

I predict Ethan Ralph will be fat and rage.


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## RalphaMania (Dec 31, 2022)

RalphaMania delivers and becomes the highest point in Ralph's lolcow history for a while.
Heart disease saga continues + kidney failure saga begins.
Ralph doxes Avon, Max, Kaz and Bibble over gay shit.


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## Crankenstein (Dec 31, 2022)

*Up to Three Submissions for Card:*

1. Jim dies
2. Sargon ascends to new Internet Daddy™
3. Jewsh loses more weight


*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Cobes gets really drunk
2. DSP outlives another HATER©
3. Kiwi Pokemon ROM Hack takes off

*Less-Likely:*

1. Venus An Heros
2. KanadaJin return
3. Abby Brown pedo arrest

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Cyrax vs DSP sex tape
2. Ralph marries Mariah Carey 
3. Kiwifarms.cc comes back


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## Logistical Nightmare (Dec 31, 2022)

Up to Three Submissions for Card:


Pig and horse decide to make their relationship open, and the first person Ralph sleeps with turns out to be a tranny
Metokur makes it till December 2023 before any massive health complication hits. Ralph calls it a “Christmas miracle” when Jim does kick the bucket
Keffals 41%’s
Likely:


PPP gains another hundred pounds
We have another Total Retard War scare, this time one of the #dropkiwifarmer gets caught doing something illegal. No one is jailed.
Ralph breaks up with pantsu, custody arc 2 kicks off and consumes the year. 

Less-Likely:


Rouge Internet man, knock off Jim clone who was doxed and quit the internet, returns to once again clown on Dylan Thomas. He is again doxed and flees the internet for a second time. 
Ralph loses more than 20lbs by his own volition 
Chris is found sane enough to stand trial, leads to a mockery of a case that is the next Depp v heard

Wtf, lol?

Josh feet pics are rediscovered and wide spread, leading to his location being discovered by a European cobbler. This doesn’t cause any damage to the farms or Josh, but the forum begin referring to him as “feeter” instead of “feeder”
To own the prudes, Rekieta troons out, opens his own only fans. 
PPP takes up coke, gets back down to under 200 lbs. Warski takes all credit.


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## Chud Visigoth (Dec 31, 2022)

Card submissions: 

Ralph impregnates Meigh again shortly before/after their relationship falls apart.  She gets with someone who's almost as embarrassing as him (possibly in the Digibro sphere) and gives the baby a horrible anime name. 
Ralph is attacked at his bowling tournament.  His attacker is either wearing a pig suit or a corn suit, we get a reprise of "arrest him arrest him".  Ralph does not acknowledge this on stream, but Metokur goes on somebody else's stream to laugh at him (his only appearance in 2023).
Ralph slips up and accidentally lifts his shirt on stream, revealing a serious gunt infection (either staph or fungal) as a result of living in Mexico and/or constant traveling.  He becomes extremely sick as a result but I predict he makes it to 2024.


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## felted (Dec 31, 2022)

*Submissions*

1. Ralph gets beaten up at his wrasslin' event by some spergy aylawgs
2. Jim "dies" (quits the internet) due to the totally real canceraids (merch store still up btw).
3. Warski gets a sex tape leaked.

*Additional Predictions:

Likely:*

1. Fatrick becomes the next cow king of shit, once Porsalin drops a documentary on the fat faggot with bitch tits.
2. Trannies DDOS the farms.
3. PPP suffers a heart attack.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Beardsoy Beardly kills himself.
2. Nick Rekieta gets divorced & raped by the courts.
3. Graf (Poast admin) gets arrested and sent to Canadian jail.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Chris Chan breaks out of prison and joins America First.
2. Flamenco gets a real girlfriend.
3. Godwinson sticks around to continue making content.


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## TheGoodNamesHaveBeenTaken (Dec 31, 2022)

Barack 0bama gets outed and comes out of the closet.


----------



## The Ugly One (Dec 31, 2022)

Boogie ODs on benzos and dies, fat and unloved


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## Big Boss Nigger (Dec 31, 2022)

Jesus Christ to return and explain why George Floyd deserved it and the 2020 election was rigged.


----------



## Sargon's wife's son (Jan 1, 2023)

*dditional Predictions:

Likely:*

1 Nicholas J Fuentes gets caught at a gay bathhouse having his dumper pumped
2. JD McNeal is still low energy and finds an actual better thing to do with this life than a logging a closeted homosexual
3. The Battle of Jim's driveway never happens
etc.

*Less-Likely:*

1. Andy does too much cocaine and bites the head off a bat on stream
2. P p p has a heart attack requiring multiple heart surgeries 
3. Ethan Ralph ends up in federal prison being pounded in the ass by a black guy named Bubba
etc.

*Wtf, lol?*

1. Joshua Conner Moon it's giving hero of Ukraine for defending the World from disgusting subhuman trannies
2. The Kiwi Farms gets filled with more and more faggets who can't stop talking about politics
3. The French legalize pedophilia
etc.


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## Jump (Jan 1, 2023)

Year of the Kiwi.

Jim out lives Ralph.


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## GaryGray (Jan 1, 2023)

Mexico is hot April till November he will return to the states.  Also most places won't have central AC so his ass will melt.  He will NEVER survive June till August somewhere that is 85 F on average.  
Some financial info will be made public. (full credit check, LLC tax filings, jilted family leaking his "hidden" assets)
Ralph will plan and poorly execute at least two live events
In a yearly fashion Ralph will find some way to outdo any prediction of stupidity (2020 having knocked up an 18 year old, 2021 knocking up a horse, 2022 getting knocked out twice in Portugal).  
*Dark horse he looses the truck


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## Chester Rigby (Jan 1, 2023)

Well...

-Henry Kissinger and/or Dick Cheney will kick the bucket.
-Taiwan will be the place where the shit _really_ hit the fan, not Ukraine nor Russia.
-We'll have an interesting episode regarding Christian. Homeless streamer saga, maybe?


----------



## Cumroad (Jan 1, 2023)

my daddy jim will release cool shirts and I will buy all of them because I love jim!


----------



## draggs (Jan 1, 2023)

There is no Ralphamania but The Ralphamale still reclaims the belt from that no good dirty ayyyyyyylawg thief Harry Morris


----------



## Elmo (Jan 1, 2023)

Will he call off the AC wedding? We'll see!


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## Return of the Freaker (Jan 3, 2023)

I'm assuming sektor only:

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. PPP reduced to audio only to keep the cabin warm

2. Milo snakes Fuentes, releases sex tape involving underage groyper(s)

3. Alogs try to beat up Ralph again, but somehow Ralph wins


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. The kino casino ends due to some drama/blow up/retardation purely on Warski's part

2. Ralph shocked and ragepigging after Godwinson goes after him again

3. Asalieri continues partnering with Godwinson, fends off attacks by breadtube and/or the casino

Less-Likely:

1. Yeezy somehow finds his way into a New Zealand fruit orchard

2. At least one more Godwinson + Ralph stream before Godwinson snakes

3. PPP has some major health incident from all the PPPounds

Wtf, lol?

1. Warski caught cheating on Metokur Masochist with Jaden McNeil

2. Lady Rackets releases _One Lawyer One Bottle in Jamaica_

3. Rackets gets an official sponsorship from Balldo


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## Nikes_JustDoIt (Yesterday at 4:44 PM)

Shout out to the people that put marriage on the bingo cards.


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