# TLoU2 - Gay Panic in the Time of Plague (Video Game Edition, not Real Life) - June 19, 2020(?) - ???



## Pargon (Jun 15, 2020)

Presumably this includes Naughty Dog's latest award bait.

Certainly ur boi will treat it with the maturity and nuance the title demands. All posts pertaining oughta go hurr.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 15, 2020)

On one hand, Phil HAS to be aware of how much TLoU2 is going to trigger his stupid "I have a wife!" nonsense, but on the other hand, he doesn't avoid it any other time, so why would that be an exception, right?


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## GayestFurryTrash (Jun 15, 2020)

Phil might be the only streamer we can watch get outsmarted by the game's braindead AI.


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## Filthy Greenskin (Jun 15, 2020)

Looking forward to 20 hours of things happening on screen and then Phil saying what just happened a half second later. 

Also


Spoiler



betting on an epic t-pose and OOOOHHHHDIDYEWSEEDAT? when it gets to the joel in one scene


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## Xenomorph (Jun 15, 2020)

I misread this shit and thought the fuck was finally admitting he wants to suck cocks. 0/10


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## Synth (Jun 15, 2020)

Xenomorph said:


> I misread this shit and thought the fuck was finally admitting he wants to suck cocks. 0/10


Nah, he's hanging onto that shit as a wild card a la Kevin Spacey.


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## The Last Stand (Jun 15, 2020)

I wonder how Phil is doing with all is going on in Seattle. He's probably scared shitless.


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## Xenomorph (Jun 15, 2020)

The Last Stand said:


> I wonder how Phil is doing with all is going on in Seattle. He's probably scared shitless.


Nah bro remember, Fil grew up in the ghetto with gunshots right outside his doe


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## Salubrious (Jun 15, 2020)

Thanks @Pargon 

This game is looking to be the biggest trainwreck of the year, so since I've taken a DSP hiatus for a bit, I'm looking forward to reading this thread and see DSP bigboysplain the stupidity and wokeness.


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## tzgnilki (Jun 16, 2020)

he'll just echo whatever the popular sentiment is on twitter


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## Pargon (Jun 16, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> he'll just echo whatever the popular sentiment is on twitter


I'm sure his take on the social aspects will be identical to what we got during FF7R: the prevailing internet opinion delivered by a mushmouthed smoothbrain who has no real interest in examining the message of the art but feels he needs to say _something_ in order to avoid garnering wider criticism (and maybe to snag a few extra dahllers in the process).

At this point I'd actually respect him _more_ if he just cut loose with a bigoted screed or whined about how too many games are injected with social messages from just one side. That at least would be believable, and I'd get behind the honesty if not the message itself. But nah, he'll play it safe and wind up tripping over his own dick anyway because he can't play a game poorly and communicate like a human being at the same time.


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## Honzou (Jun 16, 2020)

Can't wait to see him bumble through stealth segments, that's always a treat.


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## gh0stzero (Jun 16, 2020)

Pargon said:


> I'm sure his take on the social aspects will be identical to what we got during FF7R: the prevailing internet opinion delivered by a mushmouthed smoothbrain who has no real interest in examining the message of the art but feels he needs to say _something_ in order to avoid garnering wider criticism (and maybe to snag a few extra dahllers in the process).
> 
> At this point I'd actually respect him _more_ if he just cut loose with a bigoted screed or whined about how too many games are injected with social messages from just one side. That at least would be believable, and I'd get behind the honesty if not the message itself. But nah, he'll play it safe and wind up tripping over his own dick anyway because he can't play a game poorly and communicate like a human being at the same time.


There's another possibility.

That he'll take the stance of purposely ignoring any social issues the game brings up and focuses on the gameplay.


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## Pargon (Jun 16, 2020)

tripmix said:


> There's another possibility.
> 
> That he'll take the stance of purposely ignoring any social issues the game brings up and focuses on the gameplay.


That'd be the intelligent thing to do considering Phil has neither the social intelligence nor the verbal acumen to address _any_ sort of message in a video game or any other media, and I'm sure that's the line he'll keep for a while, but his chat won't let him stick to it. They'll keep baiting him until he gets pissed, and when Phil gets pissed he unhinges his jaw and inserts both pale, unwashed feet. Then he'll berate them, say he'll address it when the time comes, and we won't hear anything about it for one or two streams because he'll need to research what tepid, milquetoast response he'll need to prepare to make sure Snort Burnell and the other 'tractors don't get their soundbytes for the day.


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## TheTractor (Jun 16, 2020)

Can't wait for his intellectual ''It's a mixed bag'' hot take on the game.


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## ZehnBoat (Jun 16, 2020)

TheTractor said:


> Can't wait for his intellectual ''It's a mixed bag'' hot take on the game.


THE GAMEPLAY WAS ONE OF THE WORST I HAD EVER PLAYED
EVERYTHING WAS BROKEN
THE PLOT WAS BORING

7/10


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## Zappin’ And Spazzin’ (Jun 16, 2020)

I can’t believe you guys are about to force yourselves to endure 15 hours of goat laughter.


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## Shick (Jun 16, 2020)

Zappin’ And Spazzin’ said:


> I can’t believe you guys are about to force yourselves to endure 15 hours of goat laughter.


Apparently the game is 20-25 hours long, meaning it'll take Phil 40+.


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## Anonymous Dimwit (Jun 16, 2020)

I can't wait for him to talk about how he's ok with trans-people. Nothing makes his stream cringier at times than FakeSydePhil.


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## Lilly Philly Burnelli (Jun 16, 2020)

The bigger question is: When the transgender girl gets killed in the cut scene . Will it be an overacted “holy shit!” an “uhhhhh” staring into chat or completely silent?


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## Gramh (Jun 16, 2020)

Lilly Philly Burnelli said:


> The bigger question is: When the transgender girl gets killed in the cut scene . Will it be an overacted “holy shit!” an “uhhhhh” staring into chat or completely silent?



My money is on a casual T-pose/Lean back with occasional smug "can you believe this shit" looks into the vicinity of the camera with a lean in pause at the end of the segment to pigsplain his shitty hot take on the subject which will be as Paragon said some fence riding bullshit that doesn't get Twitch on his case.


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## King Daddy Telomerase (Jun 16, 2020)

Phil will do what he usually does, occasionally goat laugh. And eventually say the Twitter/Twitch socially acceptable script that he read during a 40 minute break.


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## BrokeACKMountain (Jun 16, 2020)

Lilly Philly Burnelli said:


> The bigger question is: When the transgender girl gets killed in the cut scene . Will it be an overacted “holy shit!” an “uhhhhh” staring into chat or completely silent?


Duhuhuhuhuh...


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## gh0stzero (Jun 17, 2020)

Anyone know if there's any extra romance side content? Trannys included.


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## Optimus Prime (Jun 18, 2020)

Yes, all my dreams are coming true.



tripmix said:


> Anyone know if there's any extra romance side content? Trannys included.



Funny you ask this, given apparently 4chan (and it's in the main TLOU2 thread) just dumped a sex scene involving the main antagonist.


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## Salubrious (Jun 18, 2020)

Optimus Prime said:


> Funny you ask this, given apparently 4chan (and it's in the main TLOU2 thread) just dumped a sex scene involving the main antagonist.



I just saw it.  Can't wait to watch DSP's reaction on a detractor channel.


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## Optimus Prime (Jun 18, 2020)

Salubrious said:


> I just saw it.  Can't wait to watch DSP's reaction on a detractor channel.



That ALONE would make sitting through pigroach laughter worth it.


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## Full Race Replay (Jun 18, 2020)

So the tranny sex scene is way worse than anything in the final fantasy 7 remake Phil just played. I wonder if he’s gonna hear about it beforehand and keep talking about it for weeks before and after 

or he’ll be completely surprised by it which would be even more funny


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## Genie The Hedgehog (Jun 18, 2020)

His paypigs are gonna ruin the surprise. 100%.


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## Kermit the Frog (Jun 18, 2020)

I cannot believe how unappealing that sex scene is. And it's not just because the girl has those weird muscle girl tits that totally look like pecs. Has anybody at Naughty Dog ever had sex? Anyway, here it is if you want to see it.


Spoiler







Your browser is not able to display this video.





Also, the ending of the game was spoiled, too. You know things are bad when not even the redditors can defend it. https://www.reddit.com/r/TheLastOfUs2/comments/hayfxt/the_ending/


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## Muppetmode (Jun 18, 2020)

can’t wait to hear Phil’s take, or maybe he’ll drop the game once he finds out


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## L.I.M.B. Commander (Jun 18, 2020)

Muppetmode said:


> can’t wait to hear Phil’s take, or maybe he’ll drop the game once he finds out



Yea Phil will either drop or not play this game at all. We all remember his "hot take" on FF7R's cloud crossdressing scene. With all the leaks about the raging trash fire that is The Last Of Us 2 coming out, it ticks all of Phil autistic check boxes so......


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## tzgnilki (Jun 18, 2020)

phil always watches videos and playthroughs to prepare for his own playthrough

so we can expect a well prepared lgbt speech about how it doesn't bother him while simultaneously looking horrified and laughing nervously at homosexuals


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## Schmeckel (Jun 18, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> phil always watches videos and playthroughs to prepare for his own playthrough
> 
> so we can expect a well prepared lgbt speech about how it doesn't bother him while simultaneously looking horrified and laughing nervously at homosexuals


What's the over/under on how many overly chomped fingers he's going to have from holding back all the slurs he wants to bellow?  I know that's usually reserved for when Tyrone shows up on screen, but this is going to make him even more uncomfortable.  Snort's going to have a 30 minute mahntahge of him chewing his fingers.


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## tzgnilki (Jun 18, 2020)

Schmeckel said:


> What's the over/under on how many overly chomped fingers he's going to have from holding back all the slurs he wants to bellow?  I know that's usually reserved for when Tyrone shows up on screen, but this is going to make him even more uncomfortable.  Snort's going to have a 30 minute mahntahge of him chewing his fingers.



I think he'll over emphasise the confusing plot to mask his hatred for black ppl and the game


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## der rademacher (Jun 18, 2020)

Honzou said:


> Can't wait to see him bumble through stealth segments, that's always a treat.


Don't get your hopes up. https://www.inverse.com/gaming/last...-settings-tk-hidden-features-you-need-to-know If Mr. "I always play on the difficulty that's preset, because that is the way the developers had it intended to be played!" (which would be the "moderate" setting in this case) should notice the custom difficulty and decides to ignore his own mantra because he likes what he sees there, he will set this game to autoplay on training wheels and make his walkthr..., pardon me, his playthrough a boring snoozefest.



Kermit the Frog said:


> Also, the ending of the game was spoiled, too. You know things are bad when not even the redditors can defend it. https://www.reddit.com/r/TheLastOfUs2/comments/hayfxt/the_ending/



To be honest, after what happens to Joel, I feared for something much, much worse. This shit here, a "breaking the cycle" ending, I can at least tolerate.


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## Muppetmode (Jun 18, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> phil always watches videos and playthroughs to prepare for his own playthrough
> 
> so we can expect a well prepared lgbt speech about how it doesn't bother him while simultaneously looking horrified and laughing nervously at homosexuals


Don’t forget the head smacks


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## Full Race Replay (Jun 18, 2020)

Is the sex scene allowed to be broadcast on twitch? Obviously, because they are both men it doesn't matter that nipples are showing


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## Julia Chang (Jun 18, 2020)

Full Race Replay said:


> Is the sex scene allowed to be broadcast on twitch? Obviously, because they are both men it doesn't matter that nipples are showing






By my understanding of these guidelines it's fine
The real question is whether or not Phil will play the "I'm married" card, call it "immature", or just make noises.


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## Shick (Jun 18, 2020)

Full Race Replay said:


> Is the sex scene allowed to be broadcast on twitch? Obviously, because they are both men it doesn't matter that nipples are showing


Yes. As long as the sex scene is naturally part of the game (meaning you didn't add it in with a mod), and sex/nudity isn't a centerpoint of the game, then Twitch won't care.


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## johnny5150 (Jun 18, 2020)

i can't wait to see phil's reaction to the tranny love scene


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## Genie The Hedgehog (Jun 18, 2020)

Full Race Replay said:


> Is the sex scene allowed to be broadcast on twitch? Obviously, because they are both men it doesn't matter that nipples are showing


As long as it's just part of the game and isn't constant or something you actively seek out they don't care. Like Strip Clubs in GTAV have exposed tits but aren't essential to the game. So you have to keep that to a minimum or you risk a ban. But running into naked people during the game is fine.


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## Vic Viper T301 (Jun 19, 2020)

What are people's predictions on how DSP will react to the sex scenes? I'm thinking a deadpan stare, trying to show no reaction, followed by pausing the game immediately after the scene ends to explain in his usual longwinded roundabout fashion that he's totally ok with this being depicted in video games (he's a mature adult), but maybe they went too far (SJW politics), but it doesn't really change how he feels about the game (fence sitting mode engage). At the end of the day his option will be dictated by what the people on his socul meediah are saying.


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## Schmeckel (Jun 19, 2020)

Vic Viper T301 said:


> What are people's predictions on how DSP will react to the sex scenes? I'm thinking a deadpan stare, trying to show no reaction, followed by pausing the game immediately after the scene ends to explain in his usual longwinded roundabout fashion that he's totally ok with this being depicted in video games (he's a mature adult), but maybe they went too far (SJW politics), but it doesn't really change how he feels about the game (fence sitting mode engage). At the end of the day his option will be dictated by what the people on his socul meediah are saying.


First, there will be ALOTTAPEEPUL are telling him that there's a troon sex scene later on. He'll likely say "Oh, God, just shut up about that already. 

Then, when he gets to it, he'll either A. Skip it if he can, or B. Go clown mode and make fun of it, or maybe C. Just chew his nails feverishly as if 10 black dudes just walked on screen. 

I'm guessing more A and C because he's probably watched the leaked clips a few dozen times, dreaming about his greasy man-pixels doing the same to him.


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## TankMelee (Jun 19, 2020)

Vic Viper T301 said:


> What are people's predictions on how DSP will react to the sex scenes?


[cutscene starts] "Now this is funny- what? It skipped the cutscene?! Aw man, I wanted to pause the game to talk to you guys but the cutscene skipped! Oh, well. ... everyone in chat is saying 'he skipped the scene.' What scene?"


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 19, 2020)

johnny5150 said:


> i can't wait to see phil's reaction to the tranny love scene


Same, given how ever since Khet joined the Wakhando as the permanent soulmaid he went full clown mode during every romantic subplot in any game he played no minor how minor the subplot actually was, just to prove that he's a mature adult.


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## Forbidden Math (Jun 19, 2020)

Phil's reaction when he watches the scene: "You don't want to get buttfucked, trust me!"


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## johnny5150 (Jun 19, 2020)




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## Tomssu (Jun 19, 2020)




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## Denmark Mafia (Jun 19, 2020)

Denmark Mafia said:


> This the one time I am willing to watch the beginning of a DSP playthrough. Two train-wrecks colliding = win?
> Pre-stream has started.



.

Let's do this.


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## gettingthatgrooveback (Jun 19, 2020)

Why is he playing SF2 instead of TLOU2 during the night stream? Why does he must play more than one game in a day? Why is he so autistic?


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## Balr0g (Jun 19, 2020)

Tomssu said:


> View attachment 1389722


The scene is probably longer then he lasts with Kat.


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## Schmeckel (Jun 19, 2020)

Balr0g said:


> The scene is probably longer then he lasts with Kat.


You assume they've ever had swine-equine nasty time.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 19, 2020)

Tomssu said:


> View attachment 1389722


You really can’t make this shit up.....


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## Muppetmode (Jun 19, 2020)

Oof dsp having some real heads as takes on this prestream


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## der rademacher (Jun 19, 2020)

Balr0g said:


> The scene is probably longer then he lasts with Kat.


Assuming it's not him on the recieving end.


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## Lilly Philly Burnelli (Jun 19, 2020)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> Phil's reaction when he watches the scene: "You don't want to get buttfucked, trust me!"






Your browser is not able to display this video.


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## Tomssu (Jun 19, 2020)

der rademacher said:


> Assuming it's not him on the recieving end.


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## Denmark Mafia (Jun 19, 2020)

Does DSP start video games?


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

Denmark Mafia said:


> Does DSP start video games?


Only after seranading his audience with the same shitty songs they've heard a million times over.


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## Denmark Mafia (Jun 19, 2020)

tripmix said:


> Only after seranading his audience with the same shitty songs they've heard a million times over.



I remember his drawn out pre-streams but going into another loading screen / song sequence without having started the game? Stream has been going on for over an hour.


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

Game starts off with accessibility features primarily designed for partially sighted people, of course Phil loves this.


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## actually (Jun 19, 2020)

He more or less plans to ramble on until 12 PM (his time) every day. That way he only has to play 2 hours until his "break", where he can shamble away for 30 minutes, and then return for a final 1.5 hours of shitty playing. He gets his money regardless, so he doesn't care.


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

$45/100 on the tips and we've barely started


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## Draza (Jun 19, 2020)

Lilly Philly Burnelli said:


> View attachment 1389819


He sure knows a lot about ass fucking for some reason....


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## Muppetmode (Jun 19, 2020)

actually said:


> He more or less plans to ramble on until 12 PM (his time) every day. That way he only has to play 2 hours until his "break", where he can shamble away for 30 minutes, and then return for a final 1.5 hours of shitty playing. He gets his money regardless, so he doesn't care.


From the way he’s playing it’s like he plans on the first 6 hours of his play through to be him walking around


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## Schmeckel (Jun 19, 2020)

Muppetmode said:


> From the way he’s playing it’s like he plans on the first 6 hours of his play through to be him walking around


And saying "HUH-low!" to everything.  And "duh-huh-huh," to everything else.


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

762 viewers the highest I've seen Phil have since maybe dark souls 3


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## gettingthatgrooveback (Jun 19, 2020)

tripmix said:


> View attachment 1389886
> 
> 762 viewers the highest I've seen Phil have since maybe dark souls 3


Then you haven't been watching enough of his streams. He does get close to 1000 viewers on very hyped games like Doom Eternal or Sekiro. Or when he really rages like in Crash Team Racing.


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## johnny5150 (Jun 19, 2020)

he just got past the intro screen and he explaining everything he sees in ellie house


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

Spoiler in tip message calls for "mahds" to ban them



gettingthatgrooveback said:


> Then you haven't been watching enough of his streams.



Can you blame me for not watching his streams?


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## gettingthatgrooveback (Jun 19, 2020)

Just a reminder that DSP spoiled himself when the leaks came out. He casually mentions this like it's not a big deal.


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## Zappin’ And Spazzin’ (Jun 19, 2020)

johnny5150 said:


> he just got past the intro screen and he explaining everything he sees in ellie house


It's some weird stalling technique he's picked up lately. Like how in FF7:R he spent a lot of the first playthrough just ambling around and looking at posters on the wall, overcompensating for how invested he is in a game. Tevin put it best, watch the first few parts of one of his recent playthroughs then compare it to the middle, "he just becomes a zombie." 


gettingthatgrooveback said:


> Just a reminder that DSP spoiled himself when the leaks came out. He casually mentions this like it's not a big deal.


But how will we get his true and honest reactions now?!


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## Shick (Jun 19, 2020)

Phil was just given a button prompt to press triangle, and he read it aloud as "press A."


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## actually (Jun 19, 2020)

Zappin’ And Spazzin’ said:


> It's some weird stalling technique he's picked up lately. Like how in FF7:R he spent a lot of the first playthrough just ambling around and looking at posters on the wall, overcompensating for how invested he is in a game. Tevin put it best, watch the first few parts of one of his recent playthroughs then compare it to the middle, "he just becomes a zombie."
> 
> But how will we get his true and honest reactions now?!



He stalls out so he can read ahead on what's coming. That's pretty much it.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 19, 2020)

actually said:


> He stalls out so he can read ahead on what's coming. That's pretty much it.



It's telling that he doesn't seem to get pissy when accused of peaking at what's ahead, like he does with the Champions memes.


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## King Daddy Telomerase (Jun 19, 2020)

I'm guessing Phil skips the scene entirely to avoid any possible Twitch shenanigans because he knows people would be reporting it. I know the scene is supposedly within Twitch rules, but Phil knows first-hand those rules don't mean shit.


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## Malcolm Tucker (Jun 19, 2020)

darkwingosonichugorl said:


> I'm guessing Phil skips the scene entirely to avoid any possible Twitch shenanigans because he knows people would be reporting it. I know the scene is supposedly within Twitch rules, but Phil knows first-hand those rules don't mean shit.



Nah he is the ultra contrarian, he will sit in silence as it happens and then just say "Uhhhhh is that it? That's what people are talking about? So stupid *goat laugh*".


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## ZehnBoat (Jun 19, 2020)

Malcolm Tucker said:


> Nah he is the ultra contrarian, he will sit in silence as it happens and then just say "Uhhhhh is that it? That's what people are talking about? So stupid *goat laugh*".


uh, , people need to grow up.
*two seconds later, a guy falls in a strange way*
**T POSES AND FAKE LAUGHS FOR 5 MINUTES**
DID YOU SEE THAT? THE GUY FELL DOWN ARFARFARFARFARFARF


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## leChinkyRaccoon (Jun 19, 2020)

Malcolm Tucker said:


> Nah he is the ultra contrarian, he will sit in silence as it happens and then just say "Uhhhhh is that it? That's what people are talking about? So stupid *goat laugh*".


I think the various trans stuff in this will be pretty telling to contrast it to his FF7 remake breakdown over crossdressing.


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## Comma (Jun 19, 2020)

Your browser is not able to display this video.






























Spoiler





==> not photoshopped!


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## QwahlityKahntent (Jun 19, 2020)

Kermit the Frog said:


> I cannot believe how unappealing that sex scene is. And it's not just because the girl has those weird muscle girl tits that totally look like pecs. Has anybody at Naughty Dog ever had sex? Anyway, here it is if you want to see it.
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> ...


lmao that is so fucking digsuting


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## PieceofShet (Jun 19, 2020)

Comma said:


> View attachment 1390087
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Yes. Those are looks like the worst fake family photos.

Unlike these.


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## Comma (Jun 19, 2020)

He's being exceptionally childish mature about the lesbian kissing scene. He even pulled up the PS4 overlay at some point.

-EDIT- Clip:





Your browser is not able to display this video.



















-EDIT- More moaning:





Your browser is not able to display this video.




















This man has some serious issues. Something or someone hurt him real bad at some point.


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## Forbidden Math (Jun 19, 2020)

Comma said:


> View attachment 1390087
> 
> 
> 
> ...


SOMETHING IN A VIDEO GAME LOOKS FAKE! STOP THE PRESSES!

Like why would you comment on that? Why would you facepalm that?


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## King Daddy Telomerase (Jun 19, 2020)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> SOMETHING IN A VIDEO GAME LOOKS FAKE! STOP THE PRESSES!
> 
> Like why would you comment on that? Why would you facepalm that?


Say something to hide the pain that you'll never be a truly mature adult with an actual family.


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## KillDeer (Jun 19, 2020)

Edit: Afterwards he twice called this scene "stupid" and "the stupidest shit"


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## Pargon (Jun 19, 2020)

KillDeer said:


> View attachment 1390203
> 
> Edit: Afterwards he twice called this scene "stupid" and "the stupidest shit"


Of course he thinks genuine affection, passion and love between two people is stupid. He knows nothing about those things.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 19, 2020)

KillDeer said:


> View attachment 1390203
> 
> Edit: Afterwards he twice called this scene "stupid" and "the stupidest shit"


I love how much money he spends on things he doesn’t like.
The trailers alone should’ve made it clear this wasn’t going to be a game for him....yet it’s a triple A release so he HAS to play it and just have a miserable time.....I’ve never seen someone willingly put themselves through something quite like this

the absolute best part of all this is phil has repeatedly said over the last year he won’t go out of his way for dating side content in games, but doesn’t care if it’s part of the main story, and his asshole tightens up the second romance is in the main story of a game. He’s just immature no way around it.

“maybe if you’re into this kiddie shit”

isn’t the main girl in the game 19 years old?  Why would a 19 year old have a mature adult relationship like Darksy Dephil....


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## SojiroSakura (Jun 19, 2020)

The homophobia is showing, dave.


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## actually (Jun 19, 2020)

Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink said:


> I love how much money he spends on things he doesn’t like.
> The trailers alone should’ve made it clear this wasn’t going to be a game for him....yet it’s a triple A release so he HAS to play it and just have a miserable time.....I’ve never seen someone willingly put themselves through something quite like this



He's over $100 in tips, $150 in cheers, and $130 in subs (with most of those coming from new guppy OnlyIcedCoffee). That's why he plays it.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 19, 2020)

Leave it to Phil to think that two girls (fictional ones at that) kissing is something to feel embarrassed about, but being paid $200 a day to wear a stupid vest while being an overweight, alcoholic, 38 year-old man with utterly abysmal gaming skills in a sham marriage who recently filed for bankruptcy, can't cook for himself, and has a crippling addiction to gacha isn't.

(And I didn't even cover everything I could have roasted him with right there.)



Pargon said:


> Of course he thinks genuine affection, passion and love between two people is stupid. He knows nothing about those things.



What's really telling is that even a lot of people who have never experienced those things don't act like that.


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## Pargon (Jun 19, 2020)

SojiroSakura said:


> The homophobia is showing, dave.


It's such a mixed bag (dood).

Is he complaining about it because he's a loveless eunuch incel?

Is he a bigot?

Does he have to cover his arousal at seeing two women suck face to keep Kat from rattling the jar she keeps his balls in?

_Is it all three?_


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 19, 2020)

actually said:


> He's over $100 in tips, $150 in cheers, and $130 in subs (with most of those coming from new guppy OnlyIcedCoffee). That's why he plays it.


But he could’ve made comparable money playing a game he might get some slight tingle of enjoyment out of as opposed to this game he hated probably before he booted up.

like phil skips games, ones his fans ask him to play and ones hyped up, he’s not choosing to play this game because it’s going to make him more money than another, he’s playing it because it’s the current Triple A release game and his mind is trapped in this eternal loop of buying every big game regardless what actually interests him.

All I know is this playthrough is going to be an absolute train wreck, and it’s only the warm up to cyberpunk later in the year. It’s clear this dude just can’t handle anything remotely sexual. Can’t wait for his reaction to the sex scene compared to that text he had about it lol




Pargon said:


> It's such a mixed bag (dood).
> 
> Is he complaining about it because he's a loveless eunuch incel?
> 
> ...


That really is the weirdest thing. This dude is such a weird alien I can’t comprehend what part of this shit is making him so damn uncomfortable and angry.


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## Trappin in the Trap (Jun 19, 2020)

He got triggered by lesbians smoking weed and making out. 
Just imagine how old Phil would've reacted.

"Aw yeah, take her top off. Lets see those Jewish titties, babe! Hava Nagila? More like, Havin a sex scene! ACK ACK ACK!"


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 19, 2020)

Trappin in the Trap said:


> He got triggered by lesbians smoking weed and making out.
> Just imagine how old Phil would've reacted.
> 
> "Aw yeah, take her top off. Lets see those Jewish titties, babe! Hava Nagila? More like, Havin a sex scene! ACK ACK ACK!"


Perfect example of the grass is always greener, he got mocked for years for making immature sexual jokes. Little did we know the alternative was uncomfortable boomer shaking he fist at kissing


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## PenskeMaterial (Jun 19, 2020)

His reaction to affection and intimacy is so bizarre. 

Oh and I watched the sex scene with Abby and soy guy...yikes. Even if you're into traps there's no way you'd find that attractive. She's built like the Dwarf blacksmith from every fantasy game ever.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 19, 2020)

PenskeMaterial said:


> His reaction to affection and intimacy is so bizarre.


Not when you factor in it’s a uphill battle to overcome for people on the spectrum....


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## tzgnilki (Jun 19, 2020)

what difficulty is he on


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## Kermit the Frog (Jun 19, 2020)

Phil doesn't experience any passion, love or happiness in any of his own relationships so he can't imagine other people having those things in theirs. Normal family photo? It's fake, that guy is too happy! Lesbian couple having an intimate moment? This is stupid and a waste of time!
Yes, it doesn't really have anything to do with a game that takes during a zombie apocalypse, and The Last of Us 2 is going full on "zombies?" with its shitty, boring story but goddamn there's nothing wrong with some moments of humanity thrown in every once in a while. Phil calls people mocking an awful, badly executed sex scene immature kids, but then he reacts to normal scenes like there's something outlandish going on. What a strange pigroach.


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## KillDeer (Jun 19, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> what difficulty is he on


Moderate I think it's called? It's the middle of 5


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 19, 2020)

Trappin in the Trap said:


> He got triggered by lesbians smoking weed and making out.
> Just imagine how old Phil would've reacted.
> 
> "Aw yeah, take her top off. Lets see those Jewish titties, babe! Hava Nagila? More like, Havin a sex scene! ACK ACK ACK!"


That's why I think this uncomfortable puritanism is because of Khet keeping his bahllz in a vise grip. I mean forget the lesbian kissing scene, imagine how old Phil would react to the sex scene which is yet to come!


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

Comma said:


> He's being exceptionally childish mature about the lesbian kissing scene. He even pulled up the PS4 overlay at some point.
> 
> -EDIT- Clip:
> 
> ...


What's wrong with 2 ladies kissing each other Phil?


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## SkippyLongbottom (Jun 19, 2020)

Trappin in the Trap said:


> He got triggered by lesbians smoking weed and making out.
> Just imagine how old Phil would've reacted.
> 
> "Aw yeah, take her top off. Lets see those Jewish titties, babe! Hava Nagila? More like, Havin a sex scene! ACK ACK ACK!"


Hate to admit this, but if that joke actually came out of Phil's mouth today, I'd actually probably laugh. Knowing how down the shitter social media, youtube and twitch are going, it would actually be a bit funny because of how deluted he made his content with safe and boring commentary.


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## Pargon (Jun 19, 2020)

SkippyLongbottom said:


> Hate to admit this, but if that joke actually came out of Phil's mouth today, I'd actually probably laugh. Knowing how down the shitter social media, youtube and twitch are going, it would actually be a bit funny because of how deluded he made his content with safe and boring commentary.


Agreed. Nü-Phil is so mind numbing that his 90s shock jock humor would be a breath of...well, fetid air, but at least it'd make me feel something.


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## QwahlityKahntent (Jun 19, 2020)

Comma said:


> He's being exceptionally childish mature about the lesbian kissing scene. He even pulled up the PS4 overlay at some point.
> 
> -EDIT- Clip:
> 
> ...


one of the few time phil isn't wrong. this shit is fucking retarded and terrible and cringe as fuck


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## gh0stzero (Jun 19, 2020)

QwahlityKahntent said:


> one of the few time phil isn't wrong. this shit is fucking retarded and terrible and cringe as fuck


I think its kinda hot tbqhwu fam ngl


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## Shick (Jun 19, 2020)

You know a lesbian romance is bad when even fucking Andromeda did it better.


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## SkippyLongbottom (Jun 19, 2020)

Shick said:


> You know a lesbian romance is bad when even fucking Andromeda did it better.


At least ME:A gave you a choice(assuming).

Oh yeah, aren't there supposed to be zombies in this game or something?


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## Malcolm Tucker (Jun 19, 2020)

So he can make jokes about dicks and being buttfucked, but 2 chicks start making out and he acts like a 10 year old watching a sex scene with his parents? Dude needs a therapist to work through whatever sexual issues he's got.


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## Prince Lotor (Jun 19, 2020)

Comma said:


> He's being exceptionally childish mature about the lesbian kissing scene. He even pulled up the PS4 overlay at some point.
> 
> -EDIT- Clip:
> 
> ...


Phil has serious intimacy issues. He is the adult son of a very controlling mother. He moved across the entire continental United States to get away from her.


			https://exploringyourmind.com/adult-sons-of-controlling-mothers-toxic-relationship-effects/
		

Even a mild statement from Marge Simpson being attracted to her husband Homer Simpson takes Phil completely aback and has him saying 'What the? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. . . that was weird! ACK ACK ACK ACK' 
Timestamped @ 5m01s


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## gaarashatan (Jun 19, 2020)

Comma said:


> He's being exceptionally childish mature about the lesbian kissing scene. He even pulled up the PS4 overlay at some point.
> 
> -EDIT- Clip:
> 
> ...



get it together phil, compose yourself. sorry virtual characters are getting more action than you


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## harbinger (Jun 19, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> what difficulty is he on


After the bankruptcy era, I’m convinced he’s on “storyline mode”, the difficulty that allows you to coast to the end with no real challenge.

Oh, you’re talking about the game! I have no idea. I’m not watching his stream.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 19, 2020)

Malcolm Tucker said:


> So he can make jokes about dicks and being buttfucked, but 2 chicks start making out and he acts like a 10 year old watching a sex scene with his parents? Dude needs a therapist to work through whatever sexual issues he's got.


Well in my experience gays and lesbians don't get along to well, so it makes sense he didn't like that scene, after all...


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## big ups liquid richard (Jun 19, 2020)

KillDeer said:


> View attachment 1390203
> 
> Edit: Afterwards he twice called this scene "stupid" and "the stupidest shit"


Did DSP take your picture and tweet it, or did you take this picture from DSP's twitter? 


			https://twitter.com/TheyCallMeDSP/status/1274159587201970177


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## OJ Simpson (Jun 19, 2020)

big ups liquid richard said:


> Did DSP take your picture and tweet it, or did you take this picture from DSP's twitter?
> 
> 
> https://twitter.com/TheyCallMeDSP/status/1274159587201970177



He sure did take it from here. He posted it on twitter way after it was uploaded here.

this is @KillDeer's upload - https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/1592603491263-png.1390203/

this is Phil's upload - https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Ea65VQDUMAEu6XW?format=jpg&name=medium

How ya goin' Phil? Good to see you're browsing still. 

*edited to give credit to @KillDeer


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## big ups liquid richard (Jun 19, 2020)

OJ Simpson said:


> He sure did take it from here. He posted it on twitter way after it was uploaded here.
> 
> this is the KF upload - https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/1592603491263-png.1390203/
> 
> ...


yeah i noticed the images were the exact same, that's why i figured someone lifted it from the other.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 19, 2020)

Kermit the Frog said:


> Yes, it doesn't really have anything to do with a game that takes during a zombie apocalypse, and The Last of Us 2 is going full on "zombies?" with its shitty, boring story but goddamn there's nothing wrong with some moments of humanity thrown in


I’d argue it has plenty to do with a zombie apocalypse. Most movies and shows in general attempt to add in some relatable human moments to things like apocalypses and fantasy, it’s how are minds relate it back to us. I can probably count the amount of zombie movies on one hand that didn’t have some sort of romance subplot.

The main character is also 19....he’s acting like he’s playing as a boomer acting like a teen....and this is all so stupid because at the end of the day even ignoring the leaks he was probably more than happy to read I remember the first dumb trailer for this movie being mainly focused on this main girl and whoever the other girl is kissing at some kinda party, I don’t think the marketing was trying to hide the focus on this aspect of the game, he’s got nobody to blame but himself for buying a game that’s story isn’t how he wants it to be

Great response from this person, but sadly it falls on deaf ears, phil is a mature adult who wouldn’t let his emotions for his beautiful get the best of him in a high stakes zombie apocalypse


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## KillDeer (Jun 19, 2020)

Hi Phil. Glad you enjoyed my screenshot of you.


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## iLoveDoe (Jun 20, 2020)

I skimmed through this thread and I'm actually surprised, he didn't mess with the accessibility options at all?

I saw there are a bunch of them and some are just straight up cheat codes. Considering how much of a wheelchair his audience is (literally) I'm surprised he left everything on default

You'd think Phil would spend half the stream reading through each accessibility option individually, turn each of them on to see what it does, then either say "uuuh, I don't see anything different" or "oh my God ACKACKACK what the fuck is thiiis?"


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## L.I.M.B. Commander (Jun 20, 2020)

Tomssu said:


> View attachment 1389722



Of course this is the same idiot who:

1. Get really bent out of shape due to Waifu culture.

2. Reacts to romantic main and sub-plots with the maturity of a five year old saying "EWWWW COOTIES!".

3. Went on a full on retarded rant about the crossdressing scene in FF7R. 

4. Considers having romantic relationships in video games as "cheating".


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 20, 2020)

And I once again find myself wondering what logic is going through this gin brain and where his anecdotal evidence is coming from....

first off the vocal internet turned on this game when most of the damn game leaked, this idea that people got their hands on the game in the last 24 hours and there was a spike in people who turned on it is just a lie. While he was ignoring the drama the internet was having largely the same fit about the game as they are now. This isn’t something new, it’s an opinion he should’ve already been seeing.

second I don’t even think it’s fully true, yes lots of people are complaining about the game, but there’s just as many people defending it. Whenever you have a vocal hate for something fans of said subject are always going to rise to challenge the narrative.

Where is he learning this new opinion? Two followers on twitter? The fact that the user score is low as shit? Is Dephil so stupid to not understand the game is 100% being unfairly review bombed to counteract the ass kissing professional reviews? Like people are legit giving it zero scores with not explanation, it’s gotta be at least a 5 or 6 for its technical achievements.

im even more curious to see where any gameplay is being discussed, becuase despite my lurking im seeing next to zero gameplay discussion on this game. It’s polarizing because there’s a group of people who hate how extreme the story went, and there’s another group bombing the game because the leads gay, and the other lady is a very ugly buff lady.

Ironically phil is the only person I’ve seen make any sort of attempt to defend the weird sex scene in the game, which he did long before seeing it, which brings me to my last point

why did he feel the need to defend a sex scene im assuming he didn’t watch? I just don’t get it, it’s like he saw the vocal hate towards the leaks(and the leaks themselves), saw the game get ass patted by the journalists, and decided to play his classic contrarian role, until he wasted money on the game to confirm he wasn’t going to like it. Like he was desperately hoping the first day of the game would give him something to latch onto so he could defend the game and make his line in the sand, but then he played it and his hopes were shattered. So now he conveniently sees everyone else also hating the game to justify him shitting on the game for the rest of his play through


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## Gramh (Jun 20, 2020)

I really don't get DSP's angle playing AAA titles at all. On the one hand he does it because of the hype the game gets which is largely due to the shills that he decries at every opportunity for getting early copies, but he also goes out of his way to get things he knows he won't enjoy just so he can shit on them or see how much his audience is enjoying his shitty gameplay and dead air commentary. This one especially confuses me, he had a lot of the plot spoiled for him and he knows that the game is as much about it's narrative as it is the game play, he knows that there is a group of people who hate it just because it muddles itself with SJW inclusivity (which honestly? from the leaks i have seen they at least bothered to make the characters they put on as diversity hires at least complete people and not the pandering mess that you would usually expect like that shitty furry game that got plugged for the PS5) and he's obviously going to side with them because of how uncomfortable he is with displays of affection, he's usually completely disenchanted with anything story heavy at all in the first place.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 20, 2020)

Gramh said:


> I really don't get DSP's angle playing AAA titles at all. On the one hand he does it because of the hype the game gets which is largely due to the shills that he decries at every opportunity for getting early copies, but he also goes out of his way to get things he knows he won't enjoy just so he can shit on them or see how much his audience is enjoying his shitty gameplay and dead air commentary. This one especially confuses me, he had a lot of the plot spoiled for him and he knows that the game is as much about it's narrative as it is the game play, he knows that there is a group of people who hate it just because it muddles itself with SJW inclusivity (which honestly? from the leaks i have seen they at least bothered to make the characters they put on as diversity hires at least complete people and not the pandering mess that you would usually expect like that shitty furry game that got plugged for the PS5) and he's obviously going to side with them because of how uncomfortable he is with displays of affection, he's usually completely disenchanted with anything story heavy at all in the first place.


Did he do well when it comes to views and donations on this stream? I understand why he'd want to do TLoU 2 in particular because despite how stupid he is, he may still be smart enough to know that infamy sells sometimes so on occasion he exposes himself to games that bring in hate watchers on purpose.
His safest bet are games where no matter how much he gets spoonfed by his chet on what to do, he'll still fail at in a spectacular fashion because there's a lot of skill required to progress through the game, examples are hard games like Souls games or racing games because Phil is just hopeless at those. However, people are now fully aware that Phil is also guaranteed to go full clown mode whenever there's something even remotely sexual going on screen which is a complete 180 on how Phil used to act and clown out whenever there was something even remotely sexual on screen. You see the truth of the matter is that now he's a Mature Adult™ with a wife and a catson so he doesn't have to act like a horny teenager anymore, sound good?
That's why he's probably doing TLoU 2 in particular, he knows people wanna see how he'll react to a lot of the scenes in the game, otherwise it's been clear for a long time that no game he plays on stream is giving him any joy, he's just going through the motions and forces himself to stream games because donations from his paypigs are the only thing keeping him going financially.


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## Gramh (Jun 20, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> Did he do well when it comes to views and donations on this stream? I understand why he'd want to do TLoU 2 in particular because despite how stupid he is, he may still be smart enough to know that infamy sells sometimes so on occasion he exposes himself to games that bring in hate watchers on purpose.
> His safest bet are games where no matter how much he gets spoonfed by his chet on what to do, he'll still fail at in a spectacular fashion because there's a lot of skill required to progress through the game, examples are hard games like Souls games or racing games because Phil is just hopeless at those. However, people are now fully aware that Phil is also guaranteed to go full clown mode whenever there's something even remotely sexual going on screen which is a complete 180 on how Phil used to act and clown out whenever there was something even remotely sexual on screen. You see the truth of the matter is that now he's a Mature Adult™ with a wife and a catson so he doesn't have to act like a horny teenager anymore, sound good?
> That's why he's probably doing TLoU 2 in particular, he knows people wanna see how he'll react to a lot of the scenes in the game, otherwise it's been clear for a long time that no game he plays on stream is giving him any joy, he's just going through the motions and forces himself to stream games because donations from his paypigs are the only thing keeping him going financially.



As far as I know it wasn't any more lucrative in general than his usual vest streak streams outside of a little bit of a big dick contest with bits. His viewership was up but that I'm not sure really means much on Twitch?


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## pizzazone (Jun 20, 2020)

So he might (probably won't lets be real) voluntarily delete his own views on his TLOU2 videos. Also I find it hilarious that hes willing to delete a part of his "massive amazing body of work" to make a weird drama video about deleting his videos.


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## Pargon (Jun 20, 2020)

maximumwarp said:


> View attachment 1391792
> So he might (probably won't lets be real) voluntarily delete his own views on his TLOU2 videos. Also I find it hilarious that hes willing to delete a part of his "massive amazing body of work" to make a weird drama video about deleting his videos.


If it's that bad why wouldn't he just stop playing?

I mean, we all _know_ why, but let's be real, Phil hasn't done anything Phil really didn't want to do for about ten years now. He's queen of his own pillow mountain even if it is more in the metaphorical sense. There's absolutely nothing stopping him from dropping the game and playing literally anything else apart from greed, ego and autism.

And this was his premier stream. I can't wait to watch him justify playing through the next 20 hours.


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## Gramh (Jun 20, 2020)

Pargon said:


> If it's that bad why wouldn't he just stop playing?
> 
> I mean, we all _know_ why, but let's be real, Phil hasn't done anything Phil really didn't want to do for about ten years now. He's queen of his own pillow mountain even if it is more in the metaphorical sense. There's absolutely nothing stopping him from dropping the game and playing literally anything else apart from greed, ego and autism.
> 
> And this was his premier stream. I can't wait to watch him justify playing through the next 20 hours.



I don't even see how he's doing it for greed, he's not making a ridiculous amount more revenue off of this playthrough than say, Sleeping Dogs or Fire Emblem. He just wants so badly to be the "honest reviewer for the little guy" he won't let himself not play a new release with any amount of hype or controversy unless he can actively avoid it like the plague which is what he did for Code Vein.


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## DukeMorty (Jun 20, 2020)

Honestly, the hate on this game is dumb. It is just a bunch of idiots complaining that their favorite character is dead within the first 2 hours of a sequel. Let's be honest Joel was a good foster dad to Ellie but killed people for his self fish needs over all of humanity. Don't get me wrong I love Joel, but it's not like he is a saint, he is a good character in a story but has flaws that make him interesting and questionable. The buff chick is not a tranny but some ugly buff woman who they made to contrast Ellie. On top of that, I am surprised people don't see the irony with Ellie and Abby. Ellie and Joel killed Abby's dad and lover. While Abby killed Ellies' "dad" and lover. At that point, the story created an equilibrium with both sides getting their revenge on the other. Ellie sparring Abby was to show how Ellie is ending the cycle of violence and being a better person than the cunt Abby. People want to complain because we live in a society where people reeee if they don't get their way. That is why I see dumbass Phil siding with the stupid majority because he needs to be on the right side that will give him money. Phil says he ain't a drama queen but this idiot is using this game drama to get some reputation that he lost years ago. He did this with ProJared, Tobsicaus, and  Etika to get some popularity, so don't give him attention on this. Now if you want to disagree with me on the Last of Us stuff then whatever, but at least you all can agree this clown Phil is talking and playing this game for the attention.


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## Filthy Greenskin (Jun 20, 2020)

The story is pretty shallow but Phil goes to show you only need two inches of water to drown.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink (Jun 20, 2020)

DukeMorty said:


> Honestly, the hate on this game is dumb. It is just a bunch of idiots complaining that their favorite character is dead within the first 2 hours of a sequel. Let's be honest Joel was a good foster dad to Ellie but killed people for his self fish needs over all of humanity. Don't get me wrong I love Joel, but it's not like he is a saint, he is a good character in a story but has flaws that make him interesting and questionable. The buff chick is not a tranny but some ugly buff woman who they made to contrast Ellie. On top of that, I am surprised people don't see the irony with Ellie and Abby. Ellie and Joel killed Abby's dad and lover. While Abby killed Ellies' "dad" and lover. At that point, the story created an equilibrium with both sides getting their revenge on the other. Ellie sparring Abby was to show how Ellie is ending the cycle of violence and being a better person than the cunt Abby. People want to complain because we live in a society where people reeee if they don't get their way. That is why I see dumbass Phil siding with the stupid majority because he needs to be on the right side that will give him money. Phil says he ain't a drama queen but this idiot is using this game drama to get some reputation that he lost years ago. He did this with ProJared, Tobsicaus, and  Etika to get some popularity, so don't give him attention on this. Now if you want to disagree with me on the Last of Us stuff then whatever, but at least you all can agree this clown Phil is talking and playing this game for the attention.


I think people are mad about killing the main guy because the first game was built on him and the girls dynamic as a character. Now there’s nothing inherently wrong with taking that from the player, but there’s certainly nothing wrong with people being upset about a sequel being so drastically different From the first game. The sequel didn’t need to kill one of its leads. A lot of the hate seems focused on the Neil writer, and from the little I’ve seen he seems to have his head pretty firmly up his own ass.

people also hate ending because this “breaking the cycle of revenge” is a very played out trope. There’s never a unique angle to it, while getting to take revenge and kill the killer of the last games hero who your playerbase most likely really likes. It’s not just revenge for some worthless NPC relative to the hero in this case. It’s been done before but it’s much rarer than the same don’t go through with it revenge plot.

the game just seems to have countless baffling writing decisions, it seems like it was written by someone who doesn’t like this Joel character and is angry other people like him.

They wrote themselves into a hole having Abby kill Joel early in the game before she gets enough development as a character. If you like Joel(which I’m assuming most of the fans of the first games did) then this is quite literally the worst way to introduce us to a new character. All efforts to flesh her out and humanize her have already been tainted in people’s mind and it takes very competent writing to win over people. This is especially harder for a video game because the average player is going to feel a deeper connection to a character they played through an entire story as, as opposed to watching a characters story in a movie. Nothing good can come from shooting yourself In the foot before trying to run a marathon and that’s essentially what they did structuring the games events the way they did


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## Fareal (Jun 20, 2020)

I hope the hardcore tranny painal scene is unskippable so phil has to stare at it in silent anger


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 20, 2020)

Gramh said:


> I really don't get DSP's angle playing AAA titles at all.



I think Phil just has a powerful need to weigh in on the latest games, simply for the sake of doing so. He has demonstrated way too much fear of having a bigger audience for me to think it's for those day one triple-A views, because out of all the things he COULD be doing to grow his numbers, the only one of them he does is play new games. The odds of it NOT being for an ulterior motive are next to zero.



maximumwarp said:


> View attachment 1391792
> So he might (probably won't lets be real) voluntarily delete his own views on his TLOU2 videos. Also I find it hilarious that hes willing to delete a part of his "massive amazing body of work" to make a weird drama video about deleting his videos.



My first thought on this is that Phil just loves being melodramatic, but it could also be an extension of the way he so weirdly reacts to intimacy these days.

My question is: Does Khet ACTUALLY make him do this, or is the more traditional juvenile joke where Phil thinks he went wrong with Leanna? It's not like it would be the first time he was waaaaaaaay off base in his assessment of what he fucked up on, and a lot of other noticeable aspects of his current relationship are clearly a reaction to his first one.

Of course, it could also just be Phil's way of stopping himself from being the Phil that earned a rep as a bigoted idiot, similar to the nail-biting he does these days whenever an opportunity for a racist joke comes up. Which is really odd, that he actually cares about being shit on for that stuff, given all the other things he does nothing about even though he really should.


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## Schmeckel (Jun 20, 2020)

Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink said:


> Is Dephil so stupid


YES. Always yes to this question. 



Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOink said:


> Where is he learning this new opinion? Two followers on twitter?


The very definition of ALOTTAPEEPUL. 

When DSP Tries it, with regards to sounding like an intelligent reviewer, he throws out "smartish" words like "writing" or "pacing," as if he could adequately explain how and why this is without parroting all the popular talking points that a lot of ACTUAL people have been harping on. This is the same gouty fuck that will tear through a game he hates at breakneck speed and then when he gives his final thoughts on it just says "it sucks." He has no real opinions, other than to be contrarian since Phil doesn't do what everyone else does (except for when he does, but those times don't count).


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## actually (Jun 20, 2020)

Gramh said:


> As far as I know it wasn't any more lucrative in general than his usual vest streak streams outside of a little bit of a big dick contest with bits. His viewership was up but that I'm not sure really means much on Twitch?





Gramh said:


> I don't even see how he's doing it for greed, he's not making a ridiculous amount more revenue off of this playthrough than say, Sleeping Dogs or Fire Emblem. He just wants so badly to be the "honest reviewer for the little guy" he won't let himself not play a new release with any amount of hype or controversy unless he can actively avoid it like the plague which is what he did for Code Vein.



He got around $300 in subs and cheers during the stream. That's well above his typical stream during this vest nonsense. His viewer numbers were also 2-3x his typical amount.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 20, 2020)

actually said:


> He got around $300 in subs and cheers during the stream. That's well above his typical stream during this vest nonsense. His viewer numbers were also 2-3x his typical amount.



Which would mean something if Phil were the type to see the big picture, but he isn't, so no matter how much better he does with new games, I cannot believe that that's what drives him to play them. Especially since we know the only game he actually enjoys is a four year-old horribly predatory mobile game wherein there is apparently no such thing as losing.


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## King Daddy Telomerase (Jun 20, 2020)

actually said:


> He got around $300 in subs and cheers during the stream. That's well above his typical stream during this vest nonsense. His viewer numbers were also 2-3x his typical amount.


The sub bomb was an anomaly from a new whale, but yeah. Phil usually gets like ~$100 more overall for playing new hyped titles, of course he's going to do that even if he hates the game.


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## Full Race Replay (Jun 20, 2020)

It fits into my theory that Phil is a contrarian for the optics while remaining politically correct. It makes sense why Phil would try to be defending this game and fuck with those who are shitting on the game.
Maybe he's still trying to get on the developers good side for some free copies.


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## Malcolm Tucker (Jun 20, 2020)

Full Race Replay said:


> It fits into my theory that Phil is a contrarian for the optics while remaining politically correct. It makes sense why Phil would try to be defending this game and fuck with those who are shitting on the game.
> Maybe he's still trying to get on the developers good side for some free copies.



He'll defend every game while he's playing it and then once he's finished the game magically turns into a "piece of shit".


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## actually (Jun 20, 2020)

darkwingosonichugorl said:


> The sub bomb was an anomaly from a new whale, but yeah. Phil usually gets like ~$100 more overall for playing new hyped titles, of course he's going to do that even if he hates the game.



That's a fair point, but my general impression is that big releases do tend to bring out more of his fans initially, though a quick dropoff happens as they go to play the game themselves. But they seem to relish giving him money to inform him that they will be playing the game and not around.


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## Fuckyoudad (Jun 20, 2020)




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## DZoomer (Jun 20, 2020)

I have a weird theory that you guys may think is dumb, but here goes nothing.

I think Phil understands that he's not entertaining. He doesn't like it, but he knows that what attracts viewers to his streams is the drama that always surrounds one of the internet's most known lolcow.

So he fabricates drama. He tries so very hard to be a contrarian because he knows that will make people come and watch him.

This also explains why he has multiple times said how he hates drama and so on. Just like he's not racist nor toxic nor a clown. Phil is the definition of projection. He always complains about or insults characteristics that he has.

So yeah. He knew that things were getting too boring and that once the vest sham stops, he may start making a lot less money, so he just decided to have a hot take on the game.


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## Pargon (Jun 20, 2020)

DZoomer said:


> I have a weird theory that you guys may think is dumb, but here goes nothing.
> 
> I think Phil understands that he's not entertaining. He doesn't like it, but he knows that what attracts viewers to his streams is the drama that always surrounds one of the internet's most known lolcow.
> 
> ...


Holds water to me. Whenever Phil wants more money it's not "a bad thing happened to me" that he uses to theme his little stories, it's "someone is fucking me over". He always needs to have some powerful adversary on the periphery. It's not enough that his pigs bail him out, he needs to be _victorious_ over someone or something, and I think he knows that the pigs need that too, or at least that having that encourages them to donate.

He also happily injects himself into other streamer drama while maintaining a safe distance via waiting for others to formulate the prevailing opinion before stepping in to spit on the already-charred effigy of whoever was deemed Badwrong.


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## Comma (Jun 20, 2020)

DZoomer said:


> I have a weird theory that you guys may think is dumb, but here goes nothing.
> 
> I think Phil understands that he's not entertaining. He doesn't like it, but he knows that what attracts viewers to his streams is the drama that always surrounds one of the internet's most known lolcow.
> 
> ...



Normally I'd agree with you, because yes, DPS likes to be a contrarian. No doubt about it.

But in this case, and about the subject sex/love in general for the past two years, he's actually being himself. That's the sad part about it. He gets genuinely upset about _anything_ lewd for god knows what reason.

Personally, I think **warning: wild armchair psychiatrist speculation** it's a combination of his breakup with Pandalee (possibly involving her seeing someone else while they still lived in the same house condo during/after the breakup) and his current relationship with Kat.

Regarding his relationship with Kat, it doesn't really seem like a very passionate relationship. Next to that, I'm also factoring in the fact that Kat possibly cheated on her previous partner, which is like adding fuel to the fire of DSP's Pandalee breakup trauma, making him extra autistic when it comes to (unmarried/casual) love/sex/lewdness. In the end, the whole extremely cringeworthy "mature adult" act regarding sex is probably the projection of his inner fear to get betrayed (again).

And I also think he's completely oblivious to the fact that literally everyone, save for like 1% of his wheelchair fans, knows he's acting like a literal 10-year-old about the whole sex subject. He actually, really, unironically thinks he's being the mature adult here, that's the sad part about it.


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## Gramh (Jun 20, 2020)

I finally had my breaking point with watching restreams to see him hit the vest goal, watching him rant about how bad the writing of the game is because the main character and her girlfriend find an intact guitar and take like 10 minutes out of their pillaging and murdering that DSP is accustomed to for a quick little music segment and some bonding made me want to physically hurt him and now I can't have fun watching him beg and plead for his dollars. His weird alien response towards anything resembling human emotion and his necessitation that everyone be absolutely narrow minded in how they go about their business in anything especially video games that are trying to tell a story and give you a reason to care about the characters in a narrative heavy game is just too much.


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## Comma (Jun 20, 2020)

Meet the typical _"I've been watching you on Youtube since 1879 and your videos helped me through a difficult period in my life!"_ DSP fan:



 



- edgy, exaggerated hot takes
- admires DSP
- and last but not least: expert in the field of knowing what is good or not



Spoiler


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## Paladin Derich (Jun 20, 2020)

Fuckoffdad said:


> View attachment 1392318


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## KillDeer (Jun 20, 2020)




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## Sir Wesley Tailpipe (Jun 20, 2020)

Gramh said:


> I finally had my breaking point with watching restreams to see him hit the vest goal, watching him rant about how bad the writing of the game is because the main character and her girlfriend find an intact guitar and take like 10 minutes out of their pillaging and murdering that DSP is accustomed to for a quick little music segment and some bonding made me want to physically hurt him and now I can't have fun watching him beg and plead for his dollars. His weird alien response towards anything resembling human emotion and his necessitation that everyone be absolutely narrow minded in how they go about their business in anything especially video games that are trying to tell a story and give you a reason to care about the characters in a narrative heavy game is just too much.


He’s not too different from a lot of Kiwis in the Games forum when it comes to this particular game, sadly.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 20, 2020)

Comma said:


> And I also think he's completely oblivious to the fact that literally everyone, save for like 1% of his wheelchair fans, knows he's acting like a literal 10-year-old about the whole sex subject. He actually, really, unironically thinks he's being the mature adult here, that's the sad part about it.



What makes it funny to me is that what qualifies, in his mind, as an upgrade from him cracking juvenile jokes like he used to, is continuing to be juvenile, but without any humor.

He tried to improve and got worse instead. Only Phil could pull that off in such hilariously pathetic fashion.



Gramh said:


> ...watching him rant about how bad the writing of the game is because the main character and her girlfriend find an intact guitar and take like 10 minutes out of their pillaging and murdering that DSP is accustomed to...



Case in point right there. Phil wants to look like he even gives a shit about writing (which is hilarious in of itself given how many times he has ignored a game's narrative), and instead exposes himself as not at all understanding anything other than bang bang stab stab.


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## Gramh (Jun 20, 2020)

Sir Wesley Tailpipe said:


> He’s not too different from a lot of Kiwis in the Games forum when it comes to this particular game, sadly.



I'm the first dude to come out swinging when game devs throw in a token LGBT/gender/race for woke points, like that tragedy from the PS5 reveal with the totally quirky furry nonbinary character lolz and I shit on the story writer directly on Twitter for it, Guild Wars 2 threw in some token cute lesbians to grab woke points and it's eye roll worthy because the characters are one dimensional as shit otherwise. I haven't seen everything of Last of US 2, but the way DSP carries on like this is some sort of gross misjustice to gaming makes me irrationally angry because from the few segments I've seen and the reasoning he uses to shit on it is like we're not even watching the same cutscene. This is why I have to throw in the towel, there is plenty of other dumb shit to be mad about right now and DSP's heel dragging caveman aversion to any appeal to emotion or romance is just something that needs cut. I'd rather watch him throw around the same dull excuses of why he loses in SF Championship Edition.


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## Lady Adjani (Jun 20, 2020)

Malcolm Tucker said:


> He'll defend every game while he's playing it and then once he's finished the game magically turns into a "piece of shit".


I like the one where he trashes the game and the developers only to then feature said game in his TOP 5 BEST GAMES OF 20xx

Of course he's just going to regurgitate whatever is the most popular opinion on twitter / youtube, formulating his own opinion would require him to think.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 20, 2020)

Lady Adjani said:


> I like the one where he trashes the game and the developers only to then feature said game in his TOP 5 BEST GAMES OF 20xx
> 
> Of course he's just going to regurgitate whatever is the most popular opinion on twitter / youtube, formulating his own opinion would require him to think.


Having his actual own opinion is old Phil, nuPhil just adopts whatever the safest opinion is on the internet. And yeah, granted, the reason old Phil disliked a game was because he fucking sucked at it and didn't pay attention at all which was the root cause of him sucking in the first place but you know what? At least it was HIS opinion that he formulated from his own experience which often ended up with him being a contrarian.
NuPhil on this other hand, if you took him at face value and didn't know that he just parrots whatever the main narrative online about a game is, has this sort of schizophrenic way of forming his own opinion, like after he finished Sekiro he said it was one of the best games of the year, but if you watch his gameplay it's just him raging at the game and saying "FAHK YOU FRAHMSAHTWARE YOU FAHKING TALENTLESS IDIOTS! THIS ISN'T CHALLENGING IT'S UNFAIR WAAAAH! FAHK YOU MIYAZAKI! I DON'T FEEL AKKHAMPLISHED AFTER FINISHING THIS GRUELING FIGHT!"


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## KillDeer (Jun 20, 2020)

Your browser is not able to display this video.



















 "Burp! Okay... OH FUCKING SHIT. That was not good. I get that the horse is dead. The horse is fucked! They killed it. *Man shoots horse* Damn"


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## PieceofShet (Jun 20, 2020)

KillDeer said:


> View attachment 1392645
> 
> 
> 
> ...


He can see the future.

Big ups for cutting out that fukin overlay.


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## Comma (Jun 20, 2020)

He did it again... Went full retard because there were some dicks and tits drawn on a piece of paper.






-EDIT- Clip:





Your browser is not able to display this video.





















Yes, folks, you're hearing this correctly: the man who to this very day still plays songs about dick lightning and Sonic's beastiality and who can't go five minutes without saying "shit" or "fuck" in some form, is actually complaining about cartoon dicks and breasts.

He's being such an insufferable cunt about this whole thing.


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## KillDeer (Jun 20, 2020)

"I don't laugh like ack ack ack"





Your browser is not able to display this video.


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## Vic Viper T301 (Jun 20, 2020)

Malcolm Tucker said:


> He'll defend every game while he's playing it and then once he's finished the game magically turns into a "piece of shit".


Phil's opinions on games mean nothing, he constantly flip flops. It's entirely dependent on the situation. When he's promoting a stream it's the best thing ever (Tune in for more fun Last of Us 2 gamplay!). While he's actually playing it the game is terrible (guns suck, aiming sucks, enemy AI sucks, story sucks, game didn't tell me that door was hard progress and I missed out on items). After beating the game when he gives his thoughts during the credits it's a mixed bag. Then when it's game of the year season he has to include it as one of the best games because he spends so much time dicking around playing the same three 'chill stream' games that he hardly plays more than 5 new games a year.


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## TheTractor (Jun 20, 2020)

I was about to post something related to really lonely people and their usual feeling towards displays of affection , then I remembered it's Phil we are talking about and just watched his reaction to crude drawings of dicks and boobs.

He's just a retarded 8 year old with a superiority complex.


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## Filthy Greenskin (Jun 20, 2020)

Phil clutching his pearls about some drawn dicks and tits calling it immature. As if that wasn't supposed to be the fucking point? 

Also I'm sure you could skim a few of his shitty music lyrics to find stuff equally fucking childish.


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## Nypical Haterade Comment (Jun 20, 2020)

KillDeer said:


> "I don't laugh like ack ack ack"
> 
> View attachment 1393024


He sounds like a Turkey.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 20, 2020)

Only an immature imbecil would think drawings of dicks are funny.

Please forget when Phil laughed uncontrollably at the South Park game's sex scene with drawings of cock and balls.


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## Elise Williams (Jun 21, 2020)

Just beat the game myself and oh boy oh boy Philliam is not going to enjoy the second half of the game. Personally I didn't mind it, but he's going to cry like a little bitch.


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## JimiHendrix (Jun 21, 2020)

Elise Williams said:


> Just beat the game myself and oh boy oh boy Philliam is not going to enjoy the second half of the game. Personally I didn't mind it, but he's going to cry like a little bitch.



i asked this in the Last of Us 2 thread but I'll ask you too since you just beat the game. Where the fuck did Tommy go? He yells at ellie to get revenge, he gets yelled at by Dinah...then..just despawns I guess?


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 21, 2020)

Watched a bit of a THIYDP for Bloodbourne. Phil's trying to name his character and decides upon "Sir Penne", commenting on the "5 year-old humor of detractors", when just moments ago he was seriously considering a number of names equally childish that he came up with on his own.

He's not even willfully disregarding the hypocrisy, he's just that fucking oblivious, and this latest shit from him is just a continuation of it, albeit a worse form because that's apparently the only movement Phil is capable of: negative.

Basically, whenever Phil has a target in his sights, all awareness of his own behavior is cut off, and therefore any insult goes.


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## Sir Wesley Tailpipe (Jun 21, 2020)

Elise Williams said:


> Just beat the game myself and oh boy oh boy Philliam is not going to enjoy the second half of the game. Personally I didn't mind it, but he's going to cry like a little bitch.


Doesn’t he do that every night on stream already?


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## DX10 (Jun 22, 2020)

JimiHendrix said:


> i asked this in the Last of Us 2 thread but I'll ask you too since you just beat the game. Where the fuck did Tommy go? He yells at ellie to get revenge, he gets yelled at by Dinah...then..just despawns I guess?



admin busted out the toolgun


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## tzgnilki (Jun 22, 2020)

has he reached the tranny sex scene yet?


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## RemoveKebab (Jun 22, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> has he reached the tranny sex scene yet?


No. He is still a ways off from it, IIRC. Phil is stopping and examining every piece of dirt so it is going to take him forever to finish the game. He is stalling like a motherfucker.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 22, 2020)

My question is: Why doesn't he do this when he knows he has a difficult enemy encounter coming up that we know he's dreading, and that he knows is going to be TIHYDP fodder?


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## Shick (Jun 22, 2020)

tzgnilki said:


> has he reached the tranny sex scene yet?





RemoveKebab said:


> No. He is still a ways off from it, IIRC. Phil is stopping and examining every piece of dirt so it is going to take him forever to finish the game. He is stalling like a motherfucker.


The tranny sex scene is after the halfway point of the game, nearing the three-quarters mark. If Phil is still playing as Ellie, he's nowhere near it.


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## Zappin’ And Spazzin’ (Jun 24, 2020)

Comma said:


> He did it again... Went full retard because there were some dicks and tits drawn on a piece of paper.
> 
> View attachment 1393017
> 
> ...


Jesus Christ, that was genuine autism. Nothing insightful or engaging, just spouting insults towards a slight that literally only exists in your head. He can't offer any unique reason why he hates this, he's just...angry. 
As in, yeah obviously the devs know that kind of thing is childish and that's the joke, but it's utterly lost on Phil. He's quite obviously just reaching for everything he can to make himself bitter towards this, like he needs all reasoning he can scrounge together to be uncomfortable around lesbians which he can't articulate. Good Lord I can only watch this in short bursts, this playthrough is horrible in the most bizarre ways.


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## MoonRocker (Jun 24, 2020)

Zappin’ And Spazzin’ said:


> Jesus Christ, that was genuine autism. Nothing insightful or engaging, just spouting insults towards a slight that literally only exists in your head. He can't offer any unique reason why he hates this, he's just...angry.
> As in, yeah obviously the devs know that kind of thing is childish and that's the joke, but it's utterly lost on Phil. He's quite obviously just reaching for everything he can to make himself bitter towards this, like he needs all reasoning he can scrounge together to be uncomfortable around lesbians which he can't articulate. Good Lord I can only watch this in short bursts, this playthrough is horrible in the most bizarre ways.



His repulsion and total revulsion at seemingly innocuous dicks drawn on a piece of paper is a statement to demonstrate that 2020 Phil is not 2012 DSP.

Phil constantly makes it a point to hammer home the fact that he’s matured; that he’s a different person; that he has learned from his mistakes, if his new self is confronted to any material that goes against this narrative, he loses his shit. Instead of either dismissing or ignoring said immature content, he _has_ to make a point that this type of filth has no place in the adult games that he plays.

Remember, his playthroughs and subsequent content creation are not for children. He’s a small scale successful live streaming and on-demand content creator; he is married; he owns a house; he has a disabled son in the form of a household cat: his content is serious, as is his commentary, and this kind of degeneracy is an affront to his senses and all the values that he stands for. Mature Phil LARPing as an adult genuinely believes that this is how normal people react to dicks drawn on a pierce of paper instead of the casual chuckle or eye roll this type of immature behavior generally produces. Instead he loses his shit over virtually drawn dicks.

At least that’s what Phil would like you to believe. I personally believe he was pissed at dicks drawn on a piece of paper because a) it could get him in trouble with Twitch, b) he can’t find this funny because it goes against everything he claims he is for, and c) as usual with DSP, anything related to male genitalia or other male bodily parts trigger his deep-seated homosexuality making him extremely uncomfortable in his own skin.


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## Wurstbrot (Jun 24, 2020)

MoonRocker said:


> His repulsion and total revulsion at seemingly innocuous dicks drawn on a piece of paper is a statement to demonstrate that 2020 Phil is not 2012 DSP.
> 
> Phil constantly makes it a point to hammer home the fact that he’s matured; that he’s a different person; that he has learned from his mistakes, if his new self is confronted to any material that goes against this narrative, he loses his shit. Instead of either dismissing or ignoring said immature content, he _has_ to make a point that this type of filth has no place in the adult games that he plays.
> 
> ...


And he makes it worse by addressing it repeatedly. We get it Phil, this is below your league.

In fact he makes himself look so worse, just state it once and then stop being a whiny baby. Being an adult, experienced in life, being wise, means you have to accept that *immaturity exists* (edit: And it's normal and absolutely not condemnable) and TLOU2 did nothing else than to pick this up. He simply can't tolerate anything which goes against his LARPing. This wasn't even a major controversial part of the game, it was a joke, you're supposed to laugh.

Phil did nothing else than to make himself look outlandish to the real world, just again, his reputation as a pig-shaped alien does exist for a reason.
Yes, exactly as you wrote @MoonRocker, this has no place in HIS game. The old bitter man who lifes sheltered in his own echo chamber is the target audience, right? He just shows just again how he doesn't play games to enjoy them,  but to blow his own ego. Look how stupid this game is, how stupid the developers are, but Reee Phil Burnell is amazing because Reee detected those obvious flaws. They all should grow up and make games for Reee , Darksy DePhil, the most bored gamer on this planet.

Never make me defend TLOU2 again, please.


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## Prince Lotor (Jun 24, 2020)

MoonRocker said:


> His repulsion and total revulsion at seemingly innocuous dicks drawn on a piece of paper is a statement to demonstrate that 2020 Phil is not 2012 DSP.
> 
> Phil constantly makes it a point to hammer home the fact that he’s matured; that he’s a different person; that he has learned from his mistakes, if his new self is confronted to any material that goes against this narrative, he loses his shit. Instead of either dismissing or ignoring said immature content, he _has_ to make a point that this type of filth has no place in the adult games that he plays.
> 
> ...


He also was doing more of that thing where he pretends movies he's seen are things that happened to him in his life. During the rant he said, "So, seriously. People who do that are so weird. I always thought that was weird-you have a friend who's like drawing shit like that in-in sch-in class, it's like 'What are you doing? Why the fuck are you doing that?!? It's fucking stupid & weird. You're gross you fucking weirdo!'"

Yeah, Phil, you had a bunch of friends who would sit around in class and draw dicks all over things where you could see it and get offended by it. Totally something that happened to you and not something from a movie that you are pretending happened to you. Which friends Phil? It was 'weird and gross' and you clearly recall it 25 to 30 years later right? Or was fussy little Phil just traumatized by the end credits of Superbad a few years ago?


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## MoonRocker (Jun 24, 2020)

Prince Lotor said:


> He also was doing more of that thing where he pretends movies he's seen are things that happened to him in his life. During the rant he said, "So, seriously. People who do that are so weird. I always thought that was weird-you have a friend who's like drawing shit like that in-in sch-in class, it's like 'What are you doing? Why the fuck are you doing that?!? It's fucking stupid & weird. You're gross you fucking weirdo!'"
> 
> Yeah, Phil, you had a bunch of friends who would sit around in class and draw dicks all over things where you could see it and get offended by it. Totally something that happened to you and not something from a movie that you are pretending happened to you. Which friends Phil? It was 'weird and gross' and you clearly recall it 25 to 30 years later right? Or was fussy little Phil just traumatized by the end credits of Superbad a few years ago?



Funny you mention that, that's the first thing that popped into my mind when he started sperging out about digitally drawn dicks on a fictional piece of paper.

"It's like your friend who draws big dicks in class and you're like 'what the fuck... you're weird, what's wrong with you?!'" Yeah, not only is this is the exact scene in Superbad where Jonnah Hill is reminiscing about drawing dicks on paper in middle school and then Michael Cera asking him what's wrong with him.

It's one of the most famous scenes (and funny) in the movie and as usual, Piggy is appropriating a fictional experience as his own.


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## TurboSwine (Jun 24, 2020)

Prince Lotor said:


> He also was doing more of that thing where he pretends movies he's seen are things that happened to him in his life. During the rant he said, "So, seriously. People who do that are so weird. I always thought that was weird-you have a friend who's like drawing shit like that in-in sch-in class, it's like 'What are you doing? Why the fuck are you doing that?!? It's fucking stupid & weird. You're gross you fucking weirdo!'"
> 
> Yeah, Phil, you had a bunch of friends who would sit around in class and draw dicks all over things where you could see it and get offended by it. Totally something that happened to you and not something from a movie that you are pretending happened to you. Which friends Phil? It was 'weird and gross' and you clearly recall it 25 to 30 years later right? Or was fussy little Phil just traumatized by the end credits of Superbad a few years ago?


See if he wasn't such a total freak he could have cracked a few jokes about how Seth survived the apocalypse.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 24, 2020)

Pigpiggo lists over 14,000 results for "dick" in Phil's 12 year legacy. To get those numbers, this mature adult has said the word "dick" on average three times a day.


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## Kermit the Frog (Jun 24, 2020)

The funny thing is, you'd think Phil of all people would sympathize with someone being incredibly bored at work, counting down the hours until they can clock out. Zero self-awareness.

We all know Phil's history with dick jokes and how he has no problem making them himself. According to pigpiggo, searching the work "dick" gives us an example from a week ago Phil making a limp dick joke, on top of that while doing a stereotypical Asian accent. Apparently eating a pork bun makes your dick strong. Phil heard the word pork bun as he was running around aimlessly and his first thought was to make a dick joke. According to Puritan Phil's logic, Phil from last week was being immature.
(timestamp 20:26 if it doesn't work)





Honestly, it's just Phil being a bitch about the game. He hates it so he's looking for every little excuse to complain when it's not little, insignificant moments like the dick and boob drawings that make the game shit. That's just flavor text, who the hell cares. You read it, you move on. There are tons of things about The Last of Us 2 that can be validly criticized (unlikable characters, bad storytelling, zombies?, etc.), but Phil wastes his time getting all worked up over nothing.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 24, 2020)

According to Pigpiggo:

Phil said dick 14274 times
Boobs 838
Tits 573 (Tips 9362)
Nipples 439
Ass 22119 (I used a space around ass so it doesn't include words including ass like assassin)
Cock 4830
Testicles 248

Keep in mind this uses Youtube's auto captioning so the results may not be 100% accurate


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## Julia Chang (Jun 25, 2020)

It's not a new thing for him but I just want to point out how agonizingly slow he is with this game.




Taken from the end of his latest YT upload of the game. He's 15hrs and 30m into the game and he's still _*not even playing as Abby yet*_*.* Most people from what I've seen are averaging about 10-12 hours to get to her segment.
Not to claim I'm some apex gamer who is faster and better than everyone, but I beat the entire game on Survivor in about 19hrs 30m, exploring most areas and doing most everything I came across. 

HowLongToBeat puts the average at 21hrs.

This playthrough could very well take over 30 hours at this rate.


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## LordofCringe7206 (Jun 25, 2020)

Julia Chang said:


> It's not a new thing for him but I just want to point out how agonizingly slow he is with this game.
> View attachment 1406114
> Taken from the end of his latest YT upload of the game. He's 15hrs and 30m into the game and he's still _*not even playing as Abby yet*_*.* Most people from what I've seen are averaging about 10-12 hours to get to her segment.
> Not to claim I'm some apex gamer who is faster and better than everyone, but I beat the entire game on Survivor in about 19hrs 30m, exploring most areas and doing most everything I came across.
> ...



I honestly thought he would be much farther back by now. How much though are we going to bet that this ends in a rage quit?


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## gettingthatgrooveback (Jun 25, 2020)

Julia Chang said:


> It's not a new thing for him but I just want to point out how agonizingly slow he is with this game.
> View attachment 1406114
> Taken from the end of his latest YT upload of the game. He's 15hrs and 30m into the game and he's still _*not even playing as Abby yet*_*.* Most people from what I've seen are averaging about 10-12 hours to get to her segment.
> Not to claim I'm some apex gamer who is faster and better than everyone, but I beat the entire game on Survivor in about 19hrs 30m, exploring most areas and doing most everything I came across.
> ...


Even when he plays he still stalls somehow. He's so used to stalling, he does it always now. Unconsciously and for no reason.


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## Paladin Derich (Jun 26, 2020)




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## KD6-3.7 (Jun 28, 2020)

I’m almost three-quarters of the way through TLOU2, and I’ve been watching  Phil’s playthrough, and stopping when he catches up to where I am. The game definitely has its problems. The pacing has a lot of problems until the Seattle: Day Two chapter. It almost feels like an Extended Director’s Cut version of a game. The plot structure is also really off to me. The first TLOU just felt so much more polished than this one. Each of its (six?) chapters built up tension very well and would climax with a big set piece and a good twist in the plot. TLOU2 feels too stoppy-starty. Anyways...

Listening to Phil’s commentary for this game really shows how fucking terrible he is as a wannabe critic. He really has no fundamental understanding of WHY aspects like pacing, or writing, or character motivations, or themes are bad. Almost all of his supposed “harsh critiques” just don’t make any sense, and he comes across like someone who is trying SO hard to sound like an informed critic.

The cringiest parts (besides the non-sensical pearl-clutching over the lesbian and weed stuff), has been Phil’s newfound ire for Neil Druckmann. The pandering is so obvious and over-the-top. He acts like he’s known about the guy’s work for years, and has always been his least favorite game developer. Every time Phil thinks a line is dumb, for the next minute he’ll say shit like, “...BUT that’s what you get when you hire someone like Neil Druckmann, tssssss.” Or “Yes... the BRILLIANT and immature humor of Neil Druckmann, ladies and gentlemen.” Or “Druckmann obviously just wanted to see torture and fucked-up shit in his game!” I’m sure you can find it all on pigpiggo. Anyways, he talks about him in this disgusted voice that he uses when he’s talking about detractors. Ya know, when he smugly closes his eyes and drops facts on your ass?

Phil had no fucking clue that asshole even existed until a few weeks ago at the most. You would think after “reviewing” games for the last twelve years, he’d understand real flaws and real quality in games. It’s painfully obvious he just clicks around Twitter and gets a rough idea of what people are complaining about the most in a game (and unfortunately the most vocal negative opinions of this game are coming from butthurt fanboys, and incels who just want to see it fail because it’s supposedly super woke) and tweaks it a bit to make it seem like it’s his informed opinion. He’s just the fucking worst.

One last thing... I usually can’t stand when a piece of popular entertainment goes out of its way to cram politics or ideologies down people‘s throats. I did not have high expectations for this game after all the crap that came out about it, but I wanted to see for myself because I know how ridiculous and over-the-top the “get woke, go broke” crowd can be. I’m not finished with the game yet, but so far it’s been pretty mild compared to what I was hearing. I’ve seen “Alutta Peeple” comparing this to stuff like The Last Jedi, and the Ghostbusters remake. Man... TLJ and the Ghostbusters remake were soooo much worse...


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## gh0stzero (Jun 28, 2020)

"Hello everyone"
_obs bugs out _
"you fucking piece of shit"

When OBS bugs out he talks to his fanbase like he wishes he could


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## SkippyLongbottom (Jun 28, 2020)

I had to avoid this one. Even watching my go-to streamer it was hard to enjoy the movie game. And he was trying his hardest to make it through fast and entertaining. Put on almost all the easymode options like enemies not seeing you prone directly in front of them, slow-mo, objective markers etc. Took him maybe 12-13 hours total?

Then hearing Phil is not even at the Abby part at what, 12 hours? Yeah, fuck that dude. Hearing him talk shit about Cuckman is bandwagon shit talking of course. Dude was never prestigious about his writing in the first place just going through the wiki, though I'm sure Phil couldn't give a real explanation on his crap.

The game itself from watching, same gameplay really. The pacing sucked because of the back and forth in the timeline, and the "gameplay loop" was too predictable and it had a shit ton of padding. I cannot imagine trying to go through watching Phil play this shit and listening to his immature commentary because the lesbian and Bioware tier romance.


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## JimiHendrix (Jun 28, 2020)

Character refers to an aquarium as a "zoo for fish" Phil has a fucking heart attack over it.

"UH WHY WOULD HE SAY ZOO FOR FISH? ARE YOU SERIOUS....UHHHH....WHY WOULDN'T HE JUST SAY "AQUARIUM"...UHHH....WRITING....WHAT GOOD WRITING"

it's been like 25 years since the apocalypse you fat cunt, who the fuck is going to know what an aquarium is or even care?


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## KD6-3.7 (Jun 28, 2020)

Phil keeps saying things that happen are a “plot device” that aren’t fucking plot devices. He just called it (more likely he watched someone else’s playthrough last night of the part of the game he’s been playing today) that Abby was going to fall into the water and that it would trigger a cutscene. When it happened, Phil says three or four times, “Yep. Just a plot device. A fucking plot device. Yeah it was just a plot device.” I can’t describe how retarded Phil looks when he says shit like that and thinks he knows what he’s talking about if you were taught filmmaking/storytelling terminology in school. Get a goddamn book on criticism or something, Phil. He’d never be able to fit it into his autistic schedule though. Maybe next time he’ll call a red herring a cliché or something.


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## actually (Jun 28, 2020)

KD6-3.7 said:


> Phil keeps saying things that happen are a “plot device” that aren’t fucking plot devices. He just called it (more likely he watched someone else’s playthrough last night of the part of the game he’s been playing today) that Abby was going to fall into the water and that it would trigger a cutscene. When it happened, Phil says three or four times, “Yep. Just a plot device. A fucking plot device. Yeah it was just a plot device.” I can’t describe how retarded Phil looks when he says shit like that and thinks he knows what he’s talking about if you were taught filmmaking/storytelling terminology in school. Get a goddamn book on criticism or something, Phil. He’d never be able to fit it into his autistic schedule though. Maybe next time he’ll call a red herring a cliché or something.



He has absolutely been reading/watching ahead. He stopped at a point that made no sense, except that it was right before the much ballyhooed sex scene involving Abby. To do so, he stalled for a solid 15 minutes.


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## Draza (Jun 28, 2020)

JimiHendrix said:


> Character refers to an aquarium as a "zoo for fish" Phil has a fucking heart attack over it.
> 
> "UH WHY WOULD HE SAY ZOO FOR FISH? ARE YOU SERIOUS....UHHHH....WHY WOULDN'T HE JUST SAY "AQUARIUM"...UHHH....WRITING....WHAT GOOD WRITING"
> 
> it's been like 25 years since the apocalypse you fat cunt, who the fuck is going to know what an aquarium is or even care?


It's things like this that really show the lack of immersion and care he has for a story of a game. 

The character was born in a time during a post-apocalypse world where there is no schools, televisions, or even a stable society to learn such things. It doesn't take a genius to know this, but somehow it flew over Dave's head.


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## JimiHendrix (Jun 28, 2020)

also worth noting, Phil has stated in the past he could take Mike Tyson in a fight, however he stated today he absolutely could not take Abby.


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## Pubic Enemy #1 (Jun 28, 2020)

JimiHendrix said:


> Character refers to an aquarium as a "zoo for fish" Phil has a fucking heart attack over it.
> 
> "UH WHY WOULD HE SAY ZOO FOR FISH? ARE YOU SERIOUS....UHHHH....WHY WOULDN'T HE JUST SAY "AQUARIUM"...UHHH....WRITING....WHAT GOOD WRITING"
> 
> it's been like 25 years since the apocalypse you fat cunt, who the fuck is going to know what an aquarium is or even care?


This is Phil's smooth brain not understanding that not every character has to be some boiler plate self-insert. That "zoo for fish" line is played for laughs in the game, it's said by a character who likes goofing around and is always facetious, and who likes telling cringy dad jokes and poking fun at stuff. The characters banter about it, it's fine. But in Phil's head, Neil Druckmann just didn't know what an aquarium is. Same with the dick doodles. It isn't Druckmann going "hurr durr dicks", it's just a bit of lore showing that a character was on guard duty, was bored, and started doodling dicks and tits. It's world building.

But then, this is Phil, the guy who has to make his character look exactly like himself in every game possible and who thinks romance subplots equate to cheating in real life.


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## Pargon (Jun 28, 2020)

Pubic Enemy #1 said:


> This is Phil's smooth brain not understanding that not every character has to be some boiler plate self-insert. That "zoo for fish" line is played for laughs in the game, it's said by a character who likes goofing around and is always facetious, and who likes telling cringy dad jokes and poking fun at stuff. The characters banter about it, it's fine. But in Phil's head, Neil Druckmann just didn't know what an aquarium is. Same with the dick doodles. It isn't Druckmann going "hurr durr dicks", it's just a bit of lore showing that a character was on guard duty, was bored, and started doodling dicks and tits. It's world building.
> 
> But then, this is Phil, the guy who has to make his character look exactly like himself in every game possible and who thinks romance subplots equate to cheating in real life.


Individuals with autism often struggle with nuances in language such as sarcasm, dry humor, and metaphor.

Just putting that out there.


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## Wurstbrot (Jun 29, 2020)

Pargon said:


> Individuals with autism often struggle with nuances in language such as sarcasm, dry humor, and metaphor.
> 
> Just putting that out there.


Also do people who measure their success on the failures of others.


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## KD6-3.7 (Jun 29, 2020)

Pargon said:


> Individuals with autism often struggle with nuances in language such as sarcasm, dry humor, and metaphor.
> 
> Just putting that out there.



So do androids. Maybe Phil was built by his parents, who are secret engineers working with artificial intelligence. They created an android whose body would age, but it had a seriously flawed ability to adapt and learn, so they decided to raise it for themselves. It’s all starting to make sense now.


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## FengShuiEngine (Jun 29, 2020)

Pargon said:


> Individuals with autism often struggle with nuances in language such as sarcasm, dry humor, and metaphor.
> 
> Just putting that out there.



I am autistic. 

 Phil doesn't really give me that vibe he like straight up lacks empathy not difficult in expressing it in a manner most people understand for Phil it's just not there.


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## Fuckyoudad (Jun 29, 2020)

Has Phil seen the "infamous" sex scene yet? How did he react to it.. any clips? ☺


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## Freedom Fighter (Jun 29, 2020)

I think he's stalling so the streams slow down enough to be "put on the backburner ", so he doesn't have to show the buttsecks scene out of fear of being banned off twitch or having to have an opinion on it.


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## actually (Jun 29, 2020)

Fuckoffdad said:


> Has Phil seen the "infamous" sex scene yet? How did he react to it.. any clips? ☺





Freedom Fighter said:


> I think he's stalling so the streams slow down enough to be "put on the backburner ", so he doesn't have to show the buttsecks scene out of fear of being banned off twitch or having to have an opinion on it.





actually said:


> He has absolutely been reading/watching ahead. He stopped at a point that made no sense, except that it was right before the much ballyhooed sex scene involving Abby. To do so, he stalled for a solid 15 minutes.


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## Surly Muppet (Jun 29, 2020)

'The Scene' just happened. 
He wouldn't even look at the screen for the entire duration.


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## Jaximus (Jun 29, 2020)

Gotta love how Phil said at the start that people were blowing the sex scene out of proportion and it wasn’t that bad. But he just finished a 10-15 minute rant about the scene and Druckmann.


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## KD6-3.7 (Jun 29, 2020)

Jaximus said:


> Gotta love how Phil said at the start that people were blowing the sex scene out of proportion and it wasn’t that bad. But he just finished a 10-15 minute rant about the scene and Druckmann.



Exactly. He goes “I love how people were all hyped up for my reaction to that scene. Like, what did they expect? I don’t even care!” He says that after an extended rant.

We expected exactly what you gave us, you complete moron. He said that sex scene was the final straw for him, and he “just doesn’t care anymore”. I mean... this is why most people can’t take his opinions seriously. Almost all of his negative takes on the game have been non-sensical, or DSP just not understanding characters or themes. And it’s also why I haven’t been able to take many other people’s negative opinion on this game seriously either. Of course there are people who have given extremely valid criticisms of TLOU2 (it definitely has a good bit of flaws), but if you’re gonna preach about the sex stuff and the lesbian shit... just shut up and grow up.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOinkOink (Jun 30, 2020)

Jaximus said:


> Gotta love how Phil said at the start that people were blowing the sex scene out of proportion and it wasn’t that bad. But he just finished a 10-15 minute rant about the scene and Druckmann.


I truly don’t know what possessed him to defend a sex scene he hadn’t watched yet, he has to cover his eyes when two girls kiss, he clams up every time there’s a hint of romance for a scene yet he chooses this hill to die on.

he really just doesn’t think he’s being immature, he’s straight up this delusional


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## Zappin’ And Spazzin’ (Jun 30, 2020)

Surly Muppet said:


> 'The Scene' just happened.
> He wouldn't even look at the screen for the entire duration.


This is genuine autism on Phil's part. In this case, it's not like he's controlling a "self-insert type" of character that he consciously led to getting banged. He's even controlling the female character. How in God's name could this conceivably be considered "cheating on the wife"? 


KD6-3.7 said:


> Exactly. He goes “I love how people were all hyped up for my reaction to that scene. Like, what did they expect? I don’t even care!” He says that after an extended rant.
> 
> We expected exactly what you gave us, you complete moron. He said that sex scene was the final straw for him, and he “just doesn’t care anymore”. I mean... this is why most people can’t take his opinions seriously. Almost all of his negative takes on the game have been non-sensical, or DSP just not understanding characters or themes. And it’s also why I haven’t been able to take many other people’s negative opinion on this game seriously either. Of course there are people who have given extremely valid criticisms of TLOU2 (it definitely has a good bit of flaws), but if you’re gonna preach about the sex stuff and the lesbian shit... just shut up and grow up.


Claiming not to care about something then spending the following half hour talking about it sums up Phil's personality more than anything else will


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## gh0stzero (Jun 30, 2020)

Minutes after the scene:



Spoiler











Phil's reaction to the scene:


Spoiler











Tackled with maturity.


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## Wurstbrot (Jun 30, 2020)

Reminder of the hypocrisy. This is one reason why nobody takes Phil's opinions seriously.


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## Pubic Enemy #1 (Jun 30, 2020)

God, he's really just turning into an even less talented Quartering isn't he? Follow the dramabux and have whatever opinion makes you the most money. Just say things like "bad writing!" and "cliched!" to make it sound like you understand what you're talking about while getting intensely bootyblasted about a 20-second sex scene in a mature game.

My favourite part of that clip is when it cuts to the scene in the hospital (which you've already played in a dream sequence at least once) and he completely doesn't understand what's going on. Full HUUUHHHN? mode. Gee, Darksy, the characters just had sex at night, and the game's cut to a scene you've seen before, but it's different this time. Do you think it could be a dream sequence?


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 30, 2020)

Surly Muppet said:


> 'The Scene' just happened.
> He wouldn't even look at the screen for the entire duration.



Considering that we're talking about the same dumbass who did pretty much the same thing during the Candy Kong scene in DK64, at least he's being consistent, which is unusual for Phil.

I don't think he's playing this up for dramabux either. To me it just looks like more of his obnoxious need to hear himself weigh in on whatever comes into his view, albeit quite colored by this holier-than-thou attitude he has these days, which itself is colored by... Well, the fact that he's Phil, and therefore incapable of adequately selling any approach that he adopts. Lack of awareness, lack of comprehension of the concepts he speaks on, yada yada.

Tell me the chat at least roasted his reaction.


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## gettingthatgrooveback (Jun 30, 2020)

How many times does he have to remind us of his maturity? It's not funny anymore, he really is deluded. 
Or maybe he's insulting his audience in a roundabout way. By making himself mature, he's looking down on his immature wheelchairs.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jun 30, 2020)

gettingthatgrooveback said:


> How many times does he have to remind us of his maturity? It's not funny anymore, he really is deluded.
> Or maybe he's insulting his audience in a roundabout way. By making himself mature, he's looking down on his immature wheelchairs.



How many times has he told his origin story to people who have already heard it god-only-knows how many times over the past twelve years?


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## clownpiss (Jun 30, 2020)

Spoiler: tomatoface












I've never seen so much color in Phil's face, he usually looks like a pale sickly hospital bound person, but after the scene his face is bright red.


The way he had the volume low (someone had to tell him his volume was too low)
The way he hides the scene from his view (like a kid watching a movie with his parents when tits come out)
The way his face turns bright red (like a kid watching a movie with his parents when tits come out)
The way he says embarrassing when we all know hes projecting because hes embarrassed about something himself


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## Funko Pops NFT collector (Jun 30, 2020)

clownpiss said:


> Spoiler: tomatoface
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Also he pretended to not know what the tip he got during that scene was about, someone tipped saying "Im gay,Im gay,Im gay,totally gay" andl Phil said "Aerith tipped 5 dollars saying he is gay,he is gay totally gay" as if he didnt know its a meme about him.

 He also said that scene happemed because the game was written by someone "at a complete different level of maturity in life",I cant stand how he does everything to pretend he is not a manchild.


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## Gramh (Jul 1, 2020)

I just want my Kiwibux for calling this reaction  In seriousness though, I'm proud of DSP for reeling in the amount of ads on his videos for this playthrough, at least from what I can tell.


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## Comma (Jul 1, 2020)

tripmix said:


> View attachment 1418027
> 
> Minutes after the scene:
> 
> ...


Clipped the Abby sex scene and DSP's married mature adult reaction for archival purposes:





Your browser is not able to display this video.


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## Schmeckel (Jul 1, 2020)

Phil absolutely just parrots the shit he reads on triggered-twitter.  It's kind of amusing in a way.  I played the first Last of Us, and kinda followed the development (and subsequent torch and pitchfork mobs that accompanied it...), but even through all of it, the name of Neil Druckmann never once really made it into my head.  Personally, I didn't even learn of the name until all of the SJW/anti-SJW outrage that happened and people kept saying "THANKS, DRUCKMANN!" that I figured out who this dude was.  Phil NEVER has time to do anything other than shtreem, babysit his uploads, beefcake bitmaps, and hanging out with his family, so how could he possibly know anything about the guy?  Even a cursory look at pigpiggo, the earliest he mentions Druckmann was in 2018 and it was in reference to some wheelchair commenting about Druckmann videos and being taken outta khantext.

I wouldn't doubt that Phil went through some long-ass twitter threads to gather his talking points so he didn't have to trouble his pickled brain to do a modicum of thought.  Coupled with his use of buzzwords that people use to describe how the game isn't that great: It has horrible pacing , it's embarrassing , the writing is horrible, bugged mechanics dood...and if he's ever pressed to explain any of these positions, he just acts like the President Camacho's cabinet in Idiocracy when asked about plants and Brawndo.



Spoiler: It's got what plants crave


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## TheGoutburglar (Jul 1, 2020)

We never could take Phil at his word that he's as busy "working" as he so often claims anyway, especially after we found out about his expensive hobby of collecting wrestling jpegs.


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## Fuckyoudad (Jul 2, 2020)

As Neil Druckmann is in the throes of developing Phil Burnell Syndrome and becoming a vidyagame pariah in certain gamesperg circles on the interweb it goes to show once again that PP Burnell has zero empathy for any other person out there. Even when rise of a hatebase mirrors his own experience ahnline he still can't see or accept the common thread that exists between them. Even in a game entirely built around the premise of taking a step back to see that a different perspective exists, Phil would rather use those restless legs of his and chase after two seconds of perceived acceptance from the very same crowd he swears no allegiance to as a machoor adult with a wife. He dons his debt flotation device and upgrades it for his audience to a spiritual relic, a flak jacket that protects them all from the trolls so long as people chip in for daily cosmetic DLC. 

DSP offers you real custom streaming apparel as a service. Neil Druckmann can only offer you Bad Writing. A game showcasing interpersonal relationships and intimacy is "bad writing" because normal human interaction is embarassing when you're pushing 40 and realise you don't possess these basic life skills and are so awkward that you'd rather listen to chiptune music on opposite ends of the sofa with your wife than have a real conversation with her or kwality khantent time under the sheets. 

Controlling a buff woman is bad game design. Collecting buff men in speedos is good game design. Watching a couple experience sexual satisfaction is bad game design and bad writing. Watching you experiencing sexual gratification in front children is horrifying open world design while also remaining  the best writing you've ever produced.

Eventhough he hates sharing the spotlight with any actual human being, Phil can feel vindicated when in his mind's eye he's sharing it with someone he can clearly see (from 10 mins on an unofficial TLOU reddit) is even more despised than he is - a rare treat that he gets to savor once or twice a console generation. Hideo Kojima finally listened to Phil and gave him what he wanted; long exposition dumps he can tune out and a walking simulator where he doesn't have to figure out how to attach a supressor to a weapon because mercifully the game would rather you run away from attacks while crying like a baby just like Phil does in real life. Thank you based Kojima you're finally creating khantent like a machoor adult. Neil Druckmann has risen to the call of top tier pretentious villain director. Fuck you Neil Druckmann don't you know this man has a wife and child just like you do? What do you mean your son isn't a cat? You condescending asshole.


----------



## GunnlaugurSassoon (Jul 2, 2020)

His argument that they changed Ellie's character is so dumb. I haven't played either of The Last of Us games, but even within the examples from the first game he gave vs. the examples from II, it makes no sense. In the first game, as a young teen, Ellie runs away from Joel and reads a journal and can't believe that teens used to care about things like boys and not zombies. II ruined this character by having her... go into a locked room with a girl she likes, kissing (which is apparently something she'd already done in an earlier game (DLC?)), and smoking weed. How dangerous of her! Late teens Ellie is _so _irresponsible by going somewhere (that she knows there aren't zombies) and kissing a girl and smoking weed. She should be like early teens Ellie, who runs away from any other sentient human who would be able to help her so she can read a journal!

What the fuck was his argument?


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## Schmeckel (Jul 2, 2020)

GunnlaugurSassoon said:


> His argument that they changed Ellie's character is so dumb. I haven't played either of The Last of Us games, but even within the examples from the first game he gave vs. the examples from II, it makes no sense. In the first game, as a young teen, Ellie runs away from Joel and reads a journal and can't believe that teens used to care about things like boys and not zombies. II ruined this character by having her... go into a locked room with a girl she likes, kissing (which is apparently something she'd already done in an earlier game (DLC?)), and smoking weed. How dangerous of her! Late teens Ellie is _so _irresponsible by going somewhere (that she knows there aren't zombies) and kissing a girl and smoking weed. She should be like early teens Ellie, who runs away from any other sentient human who would be able to help her so she can read a journal!
> 
> What the fuck was his argument?


"It's embarrassing and bad writing.  You see what I mean?  Um...  What terrible writing.  Neil Druckmann, everyone."

He has given a plethora of points to bolster his argument.  You just have to have a real adult brain to get the full khantext.  Nudnik.  *Lean in manual ban*


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## Gramh (Jul 2, 2020)

Today's stream was both insufferable and hilarious hearing his explanations. First, the game isn't realistic dood Ellie wouldn't do whatever she does all game bad writing. Then Abby is irredeemable because she's killed Joel and other people, so it's just bad writing and a stupid game segment where she plays fetch with her dog and acts like what a "good" person would act like. Now the game is too realistic because everyone's moral choices aren't virtuous all the time or villainous all the time and they make complex decisions and have complex reactions to things and it's bad writing for a video game because it's not fun to think about how people would actually survive a post apocalyptic scenario doods! He plays games to escape reality!


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## Pargon (Jul 2, 2020)

Gramh said:


> Today's stream was both insufferable and hilarious hearing his explanations. First, the game isn't realistic dood Ellie wouldn't do whatever she does all game bad writing. Then Abby is irredeemable because she's killed Joel and other people, so it's just bad writing and a stupid game segment where she plays fetch with her dog and acts like what a "good" person would act like. Now the game is too realistic because everyone's moral choices aren't virtuous all the time or villainous all the time and they make complex decisions and have complex reactions to things and it's bad writing for a video game because it's not fun to think about how people would actually survive a post apocalyptic scenario doods! He plays games to escape reality!


He's not entirely wrong. Not to stray far off topic but it's stupid and transparent emotional manipulation to make you play a cliche heartwarming segment as a character who eventually grows up to be a sociopath, whom you also play. That _is_ bad writing, but I doubt Phil would be able to explain why, which just makes me think he's reading opinions somewhere (maybe he's just got the KF thread on it open in another tab) and regurgitating them.

Just reminds me of this bald jagoff.


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## Gramh (Jul 2, 2020)

Pargon said:


> He's not entirely wrong. Not to stray far off topic but it's stupid and transparent emotional manipulation to make you play a cliche heartwarming segment as a character who eventually grows up to be a sociopath, whom you also play. That _is_ bad writing, but I doubt Phil would be able to explain why, which just makes me think he's reading opinions somewhere (maybe he's just got the KF thread on it open in another tab) and regurgitating them.
> 
> Just reminds me of this bald jagoff.



Except, from the segments I can stomach to watch, Abby isn't a sociopath just a "soldier". So trying to show a character that is "just following orders" showing normal human emotion while transparent isn't emotional manipulation it's just a methodology to reiterate that the characters don't fit neatly into people like DSP's necessitated Hero/Villain dichotomy in games.


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## KD6-3.7 (Jul 3, 2020)

Gramh said:


> Except, from the segments I can stomach to watch, Abby isn't a sociopath just a "soldier". So trying to show a character that is "just following orders" showing normal human emotion while transparent isn't emotional manipulation it's just a methodology to reiterate that the characters don't fit neatly into people like DSP's necessitated Hero/Villain dichotomy in games.



Right. Just like Abby’s “playing fetch with the dog” moment before she goes off to patrol, early in the game we get a moment where we play as Ellie getting into a snowball fight with a bunch of kids before she goes off to patrol. It’s showing that both characters are the same when they aren’t out dealing with the shit in the world. I wouldn’t argue for that being shit writing. The structure for the game’s plot is all over the place and never establishes a consistent rhythm. Long stretches of looting/exploring, too many long flashbacks where you have to control the character when all you’re doing is walking, those are a few of examples of bad writing he could have used, but he just points out moments of mild humor that he doesn’t fund funny (I guess not enough “AYUSS” jokes and “Hershey squirts” humor for him), or when characters are connecting in some way. All that does is say a lot about him.


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## GunnlaugurSassoon (Jul 4, 2020)

KD6-3.7 said:


> Long stretches of looting/exploring, too many long flashbacks where you have to control the character when all you’re doing is walking, those are a few of examples of bad writing he could have used, but he just points out moments of mild humor that he doesn’t fund funny



At the risk of getting too off topic, I'm not even sure I'd count that as bad writing as much as unfortunate parts of the genre that have to be written around. It's kind of like with Uncharted and how canonically few people Nathan Drake has killed compared to the countries worth of dudes you kill throughout just one of the games. When you play it you're supposed to take it at face value and accept that's just what it is because if you want him to only kill people he canonically kills you'll have a much different, much more boring game.

While he's not the only person who has a trouble separating bad writing from the realities of the medium, he's definitely below average in actual critical reading and analysis of text. He's basically a gaming reddit post about "dae (x) game bad" or "dae (y) game good" because of whatever ideology they have. And for all his ranting about shades of grey, he can't think that whatever agenda the evil Druckman is pushing is bad and even not loving the game overall but appreciating parts here or there, he's just decided the game is shit so _every part_ is shit. There is no nuance.


----------



## Schmeckel (Jul 4, 2020)

GunnlaugurSassoon said:


> It's kind of like with Uncharted and how canonically few people Nathan Drake has killed compared to the countries worth of dudes you kill throughout just one of the games.


I always use the Resident Evil series to kinda point this out. I may or may not have offspring that will ask "why don't they get infected when they get bitten by zombies?" since the characters always show up in cutscenes like nothing bad has happened (except for when it happens for story purposes, like Leon being shot and Ada patching him up...). I tell them that it's implied that they make it through unscathed, even though the player might be an complete dummy (Phil) who gets chomped on in every room. 

It's that ludonarrative dissonance that you can't really chalk up to bad writing, since the player may not progress in all the straight steps to get from beginning to end the way it's intended from a story perspective. 

Phil is just an idiot who can't form his own opinion, except for when it comes to fast food.


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## Pargon (Jul 4, 2020)

Schmeckel said:


> I always use the Resident Evil series to kinda point this out. I may or may not have offspring that will ask "why don't they get infected when they get bitten by zombies?" since the characters always show up in cutscenes like nothing bad has happened (except for when it happens for story purposes, like Leon being shot and Ada patching him up...). I tell them that it's implied that they make it through unscathed, even though the player might be an complete dummy (Phil) who gets chomped on in every room.
> 
> It's that ludonarrative dissonance that you can't really chalk up to bad writing, since the player may not progress in all the straight steps to get from beginning to end the way it's intended from a story perspective.
> 
> Phil is just an idiot who can't form his own opinion, except for when it comes to fast food.


I always just figured it was because green herbs fought the infection but eventually I played RE2 and that blew that theory out of the water 

But yeah, you can't really call concessions made to convention for the purpose of gameplay "bad writing". I'm sure some people would enjoy playing an RE or TLoU title where one exposure to infection killed you but most wouldn't. That's what harder difficulties are for. Unsurprising that a man who doesn't understand that also doesn't put those options to use.


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## TheyCallItNPD (Jul 4, 2020)

So Phil's TLOU2 "Ending" stream didn't reach the end - he stopped with about an hour still to go, because he absolutely couldn't do "ovetime". Yeah, a guy sitting in his bed clothes in a room of his own house can't do overtime. He made about $250 dollars pretty quickly though - vest and gunnars - from the paypigs excited to see the Ending and Review.

He won't do the last hour on tonight's late stream though. You'll have to wait til Monday's late stream. Why? Maybe because he's autistic about his schedule. Or more likely he knows that the anticipated Ending and Review will be more profitable if he does it another day.

And boy the review is going to be a doozy. He'll get the gunnars on again for sure. He's officially saying that he'd have quit the game if he wasn't playing it "for work" and to "review" it. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing. Neil Druckmann bad writing.

Also - Phil said one of the dumbest things I've ever heard him say. For context: Dina is one month pregnant while at the Theatre. At the farmhouse, they have a baby who is at least a few months old. After Ellie travels to Santa Barbara, Phil says: "Uhhh how much time has even passed? I don't even know how much time has passed. Three months maybe, since they were at the Theatre? I don't know." 

That's right, Phil. It takes less than 3 months to have a baby. Valedictorian right there.


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## gh0stzero (Jul 4, 2020)

TheyCallItNPD said:


> So Phil's TLOU2 "Ending" stream didn't reach the end - he stopped with about an hour still to go, because he absolutely couldn't do "ovetime". Yeah, a guy sitting in his bed clothes in a room of his own house can't do overtime. He made about $250 dollars pretty quickly though - vest and gunnars - from the paypigs excited to see the Ending and Review.
> 
> He won't do the last hour on tonight's late stream though. You'll have to wait til Monday's late stream. Why? Maybe because he's autistic about his schedule. Or more likely he knows that the anticipated Ending and Review will be more profitable if he does it another day.
> 
> ...


Another day gives him a chance to read all the reviews and pass them off as his own opinion.

And Phil never pays attention to the small details like that, wouldn't surprise me if it turned out he didn't even notice she was pregnant.


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## Fuckyoudad (Jul 5, 2020)

I like the part where he acknowledged that Ellie is now a mentally ill nudnik then chose to completely ignore her PTSD as a factor in her decision to leave for California, In Phil's world if he doesn't like you he flips a coin; if it lands on heads you're mentally ill and should be locked up for his own good and not your own. If it lands on tails you're immature. He landed on heads then flipped the coin over and decided her trauma wasn't a factor and she was just too immature to stay with Dina and li'l Jesse Joel. 

At the rate he alters his haht takes he should should really consider having his own head looked at.. 






Nevermind he's already aware of it.


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## Banned in 49 States (Jul 6, 2020)

GunnlaugurSassoon said:


> While he's not the only person who has a trouble separating bad writing from the realities of the medium, he's definitely below average in actual critical reading and analysis of text. He's basically a gaming reddit post about "dae (x) game bad" or "dae (y) game good" because of whatever ideology they have. And for all his ranting about shades of grey, he can't think that whatever agenda the evil Druckman is pushing is bad and even not loving the game overall but appreciating parts here or there, he's just decided the game is shit so _every part_ is shit. There is no nuance.


He is like your average movie audience who only watch big budget movies and thinks good writting is when there is a lot of explosion or dudes getting hit in the nuts.
Any story or plot is swiftly forgotten and only the cool set pieces remain.

Phill is no different, he played the first game twice and still had to look up the cutscenes to get caught up on part 2.
Any games with actual good narrative that Phill has played he 100% could not tell you what the plot was about. 
His only recollection of any game is if it made him mad or not and if it did make him mad the game was probably not that good.


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## Pepper Jack (Jul 6, 2020)

He is finishing the game tonight. He confirmed the stream and review will take the entire stream. If he finishes the game with 45 minutes left, he will fill the remainder of time on the review.


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## MoonRocker (Jul 6, 2020)

I can’t remember the last time DSP was as insufferable as he’s currently being while playing a narratively-driven game.

He’s been acting like a petulant child all throughout this game, just spouting off and parroting whatever anti-SJW tropes have been flung at this game that he’s obviously picked up and read on Twitter. Nothing that he has said has been original nor could be considered a well thought-out criticism that could be levied off at the game legitimately. 

Insulting Neil Druckmann? Check. Insulting the main protagonist’s love story arc? Check. Making Hulk jokes and making fun of the appearance of the other protagonist? Check. Calling out and cringing at a graphic sex scene? Check. Lambasting the story at any given moment because of his superficial dislike of the other protagonist? Check. Shitting on all of the details that render this game the experience that it attempts to convey to the person consuming it in its totality? Double-check.

What’s even more surprising is how Phil  has actually topped his own toxicity by being extremely obnoxious and getting triggered over the most mundane elements this game offers. The only positive that this game has really done in the context of the DSPverse is giving us an updated glimpse about Phil’s lackadaisical understanding of the world around him and his reactionary contempt regarding anything that would trigger or confront his ignorant value system, something that stands in complete contrast to whatever bullshit statements he has made about having left 2009-2016 DSP behind and being a completely new, progressive DSP that recognizes and admonished his past close-minded views and behaviors. The sheer hypocrisy of the bullshit he peddles daily is completely exposed by most notably going off on unhinged boomer rants stemming from being uncontrollably triggered by the drawing of digital dicks drawn on a piece of paper to literally comparing playing as Abby to the equivalent of being asked to control the Nazi characters operating the Auschwitz concentration camp as portrayed in Schindler’s List.

As usual with Phil, none of his commentary is original and stems from his own points of view; they all originate from the anti-cancel culture and anti-SJW crowds who all have issues with the narrative being taken away from the game’s original likeable and relatable protagonist to two female characters who feel foreign and unrelatable.

It’s not to say that I even like this game nor am I a complete fan of it but I recognize and at least am comfortable enough to make my own opinions about what this game offers separated from the ridiculous campaign of hate and criticism this game has suffered (if you’re seriously that involved or frustrated or angry about a piece of entertainment media, there’s something wrong with you and are just as derpy as DSP). Phil has done nothing of the sort and from a guy constantly harping about his unabated honest and original “raw” opinions, he’s offering nothing of the sort and once again confirms himself as being the drooling Neanderthal that he truly is when it comes to expressing his own intellectual interpretations.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jul 6, 2020)

In other words, this playthrough highlights, to a degree as yet unseen, just how detached Phil is from what he's doing, which is playing a video game for the entertainment of himself and others.

And just think: he's going to top himself in this regard one day, just like he did here. He only ever gets worse.

This is what happens when you become a hermit, especially when motivated by a desire to shut out all criticism.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 6, 2020)

Why does Phil need 45 minutes to review the game? I can predict exactly what he will say...

Was it fun? Yes, he had fun. He loves playing games and loves that it has been his job for 11+ years.

Was the game bad? Yes, but was it the worst game ever? No. Will he play the DLC? Probably not, but if enough people ask (aka buy it for him and pay him to play it) he just might. Is it on the top 10 worst games of 2020? Phil doesn't think about that stuff, quit asking.

It was a mixed bag. 7/10


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## harbinger (Jul 6, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Why does Phil need 45 minutes to review the game? I can predict exactly what he will say...
> 
> Was it fun? Yes, he had fun. He loves playing games and loves that it has been his job for 11+ years.
> 
> ...


And come the end of the year, it’ll be in his Top 5 Games of 2020.


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## Zappin’ And Spazzin’ (Jul 6, 2020)

TheGoutburglar said:


> In other words, this playthrough highlights, to a degree as yet unseen, just how detached Phil is from what he's doing, which is playing a video game for the entertainment of himself and others.
> 
> And just think: he's going to top himself in this regard one day, just like he did here. He only ever gets worse.
> 
> This is what happens when you become a hermit, especially when motivated by a desire to shut out all criticism.


It goes to show how Phil's desire for others to take him seriously is a switch that he commits to as a defense mechanism.
You think I'm bad at Dark Souls or any other video game? I'm not a tryhard, I'm just a casual gamer who plays and records games for fun.
You don't like my take on The Last of Us 2? You're a paid shill who can't handle honesty or my profound thoughts regarding writing.
You disagree with my opinion on anything? That's okay, you can disagree with me!
You're saying that other people don't have the issues I'm having? They're apologists, fanboys, and shills, while I'm the only honest gamer left, you should take my opinion as law.
He only crawls out of his turtle shell when he's ready to snap at the lowest of hanging fruits, only after everyone else has already proved it's safe. Otherwise he'll just hide from everything.


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## JimiHendrix (Jul 6, 2020)

I love watching phil do the ending, nigga is updating his criticisms in real time.

"yeah it's over. Ellie is going to kill Abby. She's drowning and bleeding out. It's over. Abby's dead. I mean. I called it guys. I knew Abby was going to die. So predictable. OH MY GOD. ELLIE LETS ABBY GO? OH MY GOD DUDE. WHAT IS THIS."


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## Trappin in the Trap (Jul 7, 2020)

This dude just said the game "hurt" him because it wasn't happy then gave it a 5/10.
I-I can't, I fucking can't.


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## Agent Proper (Jul 7, 2020)

Trappin in the Trap said:


> This dude just said the game "hurt" him because it wasn't happy then gave it a 5/10.
> I-I can't, I fucking can't.


That was exactly what I expected from him tonight. Middle of the road Phil.


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## Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOinkOink (Jul 7, 2020)

Trappin in the Trap said:


> This dude just said the game "hurt" him because it wasn't happy then gave it a 5/10.
> I-I can't, I fucking can't.


Did it hurt him like whatever Leanna did?


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## harbinger (Jul 7, 2020)

Trappin in the Trap said:


> This dude just said the game "hurt" him because it wasn't happy then gave it a 5/10.
> I-I can't, I fucking can't.


Ah, shit! It’s a serious contender for Philip’s Game of the Year then. Good luck, Drunkman!


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## Vic Viper T301 (Jul 7, 2020)

JimiHendrix said:


> I love watching phil do the ending, nigga is updating his criticisms in real time.
> 
> "yeah it's over. Ellie is going to kill Abby. She's drowning and bleeding out. It's over. Abby's dead. I mean. I called it guys. I knew Abby was going to die. So predictable. OH MY GOD. ELLIE LETS ABBY GO? OH MY GOD DUDE. WHAT IS THIS."


I had a laugh when he laid out three vague possibilities of what was going to happen in the last scene (Either Dina's dead, or she's there, or she's just gone) and still said "I was right!" when she was gone. That's not how predicting things works, Phil.


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## Pargon (Jul 7, 2020)

Vic Viper T301 said:


> I had a laugh when he laid out three vague possibilities of what was going to happen in the last scene (Either Dina's dead, or she's there, or she's just gone) and still said "I was right!" when she was gone. That's not how predicting things works, Phil.


"Either this character still exists, or they don't exist anymore.

...Ha! Nailed it!"


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## Schmeckel (Jul 7, 2020)

Vic Viper T301 said:


> I had a laugh when he laid out three vague possibilities of what was going to happen in the last scene (Either Dina's dead, or she's there, or she's just gone) and still said "I was right!" when she was gone. That's not how predicting things works, Phil.


"Watch.  Something is gonna happen.  Something is DEFINITELY gonna happen."  *Something happens*  

*Knee slap, snort, ack ack ack* "SEE?  I told you something was gonna happen.  Neil Druckmann, everyone!"


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## gettingthatgrooveback (Jul 7, 2020)

Rest assured guys, Phil's review of the TLOU2 is _AHNEST_.
DSP sees himself as a beacon of honesty in an ocean of shills.
What a fucking tool.


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## SkippyLongbottom (Jul 7, 2020)

gettingthatgrooveback said:


> View attachment 1433777
> Rest assured guys, Phil's review of the TLOU2 is _AHNEST_.
> DSP sees himself as a beacon of honesty in an ocean of shills.
> What a fucking tool.


Yeah all the other majority of people saying the exact same shit weeks ago are totally being not honest. Bravo Phil. This man has the ACTUAL answers!


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## Julia Chang (Jul 7, 2020)

Did some quick math now that his playthrough is complete: 
*DSP took around about 33hrs and 20 minutes to beat TLOU2.*

I clocked him at around about 2,000 minutes to beat the game (hard to get a true figure with the amount of pausing he does). That's almost exactly double the time a friend of mine took to beat the game on the same difficulty. DSP took roughly the same amount of time just to get to_ Abby's segment_ as my friend did to_ *beat the whole fucking game*_. (DSP took about 17hrs 40m to get to Abby).

Stats from HowLongToBeat for comparison:




Where did this slow gouty mother fucker find almost an entire separate playthrough's worth of time in his normal run through the game?


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## Pargon (Jul 7, 2020)

Julia Chang said:


> Where did this slow gouty mother fucker find almost an entire separate playthrough's worth of time in his normal run through the game?


@actually said upthread that Phil jerked around for the last 15 minutes of a stream so he wouldn't hit the Abby sex scene just before clock out time, so multiply that amount of stalling at least per stream and you have to figure that accounts for a good portion of it.

I saw a theory posited elsewhere in the sub saying that Phil determines his schedule a week in advance and actually assigns only a certain number of streams for each game. Based on what criteria I have no idea but looked at in a certain light it does almost appear as though his gameplay _must_ fit in that number of streams and cannot go over or under. For what reason I honestly can't say



Spoiler: (LOL YES I CAN)



AUTISM



but this may account for the unexplained hyper fixation on "details" he had in this playthrough as well as all the unnecessary pausing he does to go on tangents. This man doesn't give a shit about a single game he's played in eleven years outside of how much money playing it will make him or how bad it makes him look when it thrashes his abilities, so I don't buy it for a second when he zooms in on a texture on RE2make to soapbox about how different it is from the original or whatever. He's stalling for time (and also donations) and he's trying to impress his shortbus fanbase with normie knowledge.


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## Preferred Penne (Jul 7, 2020)

You would think he would want to get to the tranny sex scene right at the end of the stream and then immediately clock out so he wouldn't have to talk about it.


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## Pargon (Jul 7, 2020)

PreferredPenne said:


> You would think he would want to get to the tranny sex scene right at the end of the stream and then immediately clock out so he wouldn't have to talk about it.


Why would he want that? Talking about it right away means he gets to show everyone how Cool and Right he is. Also he can't save the discussion for when he's just rolled out of bed and fired up the stream; he might still be too hungover to remember his crucial Twitter-derived talking points and might sway too far off-message.

I don't know if I necessarily believe that Phil uses his valuable lay-around time to research what he should say about video game controversies, but I do think he's self-aware enough to know that if he doesn't think about what to say ahead of time then he's liable to say what he really thinks, which has never been a good thing for him.

"Chicky Chang fire up the ovens, Schmidt, we gotta chick with a dick haw haw hawwwww"


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## Zappin’ And Spazzin’ (Jul 8, 2020)

Of course, at the end of the day, any sane person who would see Phil's "honest criticism" of something would simply think to themselves "Isn't that the awful gamer who tugged his rope on stream?" and move on
Phil will never overcome this hurdle


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