# Super Secret Reehouse



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 14, 2020)

Discuss super secrete planes hair!

I'm gonna talk shit about Phil on the internet


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## Penix (Oct 14, 2020)

So there's this site that let's you ship cardboard penises...


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## millais (Oct 14, 2020)

I'm going to sprinkle a breadcrumb trail of cannabis from Jenna's squatter hovel all the way to the front door of the Wakando.


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## Schmeckel (Oct 14, 2020)

Hey, guys. Let's pool our cheerssubsandtips together and file fake adoption applications for Phil and khet to adopt a refugee from Uganda. Then file real divorce papers with custody dispute so khet can get the kid, the cat, half the stuff, AND child support.


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## SPhobos (Oct 14, 2020)

I'm going to poison Kat and Jasper so that Phil has to become a wandering samurai.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 14, 2020)

Alpha Six Zero Niner, I have infiltrated the WAKhando again and have gotten a picture of the plate Phil eats out of. I'm currently at the LZ awaiting extraction.


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## Shambler (Oct 14, 2020)

i will invade phils home and lie in wait for him to fail at a video game so i can jump out and laugh at him


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## The Penultimate Warrior (Oct 14, 2020)

Can I just double check the plan - when am I supposed to turn up at Kat's work and buy the potatoes from her? Also we know Phil reads these forums, so don't tell him about this post. Thanks.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 14, 2020)

The_Penultimate_Warrior said:


> Can I just double check the plan - when am I supposed to turn up at Kat's work and buy the potatoes from her? Also we know Phil reads these forums, so don't tell him about this post. Thanks.


Agent Delta Zero Six Niner, the horse will reach the stable when the Star of Martyrdom and the Star of Supremacy in the Little Dipper are obscured by clouds. The Star of the Lone Wolf will be the brightest star in the sky. Make sure to show up with a gallon of milk in your hand. Agent Hotel Eight One Fourer will provide further instructions when you get to the mall, over.


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## Jaracainofthewind (Oct 14, 2020)

millais said:


> I'm going to sprinkle a breadcrumb trail of cannabis from Jenna's squatter hovel all the way to the front door of the Wakando.


I had the best mental image of a pacman speed run


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## Nurse Ratchet (Oct 14, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> Agent Delta Zero Six Niner, the horse will reach the stable when the Star of Martyrdom and the Star of Supremacy in the Little Dipper are obscured by clouds. The Star of the Lone Wolf will be the brightest star in the sky. Make sure to show up with a gallon of milk in your hand. Agent Hotel Eight One Fourer will provide further instructions when you get to the mall, over.



10-4 & Roger that, Yoshi. This is Triple Agent Tumbleweed, I repeat: Triple Agent Tumbleweed, reporting status:

Agent Konami Code has secured Duh infiltration of the Renton County Register's Office. He is locked & loaded with crayons, scissors, Elmer's glue, & tracing paper. Agent awaits his next directives.
Agent 1337Hax0r Midfirst has bypassed mainframes & confirms triumph over all internet security architecture relative to both WA Muni/District Courts & PACER/CM-ECF. Access to uhhlegal electronic filing capabilities is confirmed. Top Secret Duh Account login information (tell no one) :

*Username*: First_Falcon_Out
*Password*: GAY0P5!!1!
*Answer to security questions*=
"Naht Azn, That Is All"​
"EL Crimson King Fucking Rulz"​
"Thinly-Veiled Turbothirst for Man-Dicks"​


This is Triple Agent Tumbleweed, over & out.


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## gh0stzero (Oct 14, 2020)

I know its not scary but can Blade Runner 2049 be added to our super secret movie night


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## Schmeckel (Oct 14, 2020)

_Agent Dust Bunny checking in.  I have navigated the gout mansion and have taken up position in the rats nest of wires in the phlegm dungeon.  The journey was semi-dangerous as The Child is a seemingly intimidating sentry, but was soothed by not being squirted with water.  The Child, curious about my clothing, took a swipe because of some of the tendrils resemble the wires in my post.  This might be a potential problem.  However, Mission: Impossible this is not.

I can confirm that my dust camouflage makes me nearly indistinguishable from the rest of the "natural" dust clumps.  From this vantage point, the target will be in plain sight.  This infiltration and surveillance mission is not without hazard, for I fear that the smell in this domicile is offensive and my respirator only helps so much.  Gods, help me._


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## Forbidden Math (Oct 14, 2020)

Operation S.N.O.R.T. is a go. Repeat, we are a go.


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## FamicomGorby (Oct 14, 2020)

I'm callin every shady no-license builder/contractor in Seattle to come to his house to pave his yard so the grass doesn't doesn't affect him anymore.


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## BingBong (Oct 14, 2020)

im gonna stay up past my bedtime


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## gh0stzero (Oct 14, 2020)

can whoever brings the nachos please remember to layer the cheese so there is cheese on all of the nachos and not just the top ones?

thanks btw my mother has a 7 seater if you need lifts let me know and I'll make sure there is enough juice boxes in the car


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 14, 2020)

The_Penultimate_Warrior said:


> Can I just double check the plan - when am I supposed to turn up at Kat's work and buy the potatoes from her? Also we know Phil reads these forums, so don't tell him about this post. Thanks.


I named it super secret so I know he won't see it


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## Mr. Brown (Oct 14, 2020)

I'm going to break into his house tonight and shit in his shoes.


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## Iamfrigide (Oct 14, 2020)

Mr. Brown said:


> I'm going to break into his house tonight and shit in his shoes.


Your plan lacks a certain amount of grace, but its direct and you can probably take a hatchet hit swung with the power equivalent of a toddler. Mission is greenlit.


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Oct 14, 2020)

Mr. Brown said:


> I'm going to break into his house tonight and shit in his shoes.


Oh yeah?
Well I'm going to break into his house and fuck with all his financial records!


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 14, 2020)

Adam Condor Kappa, your position is clear. Proceed to the next waypoint.


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## gh0stzero (Oct 14, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Adam Condor Kappa, your position is clear. Proceed to the next waypoint.


do i have to I was just getting ready to use his downstairs toilet


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 14, 2020)

tripmix said:


> do i have to I was just getting ready to use his downstairs toilet


DON'T BLOW YOU'RE  COVER!

Grab Jasper and replace him with a squirrel and get out.


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## Disgruntled Pupper (Oct 14, 2020)

Why is it always people named Phil we end up doing secret covert operations against? Is Phil the ultimate lolcow name?


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## Prince Lotor (Oct 14, 2020)

Mr. Brown said:


> I'm going to break into his house tonight and shit in his shoes.


That'll give you plenty of time to make a cleen getaway as it won't be noticed until next Tuesday when the Pig leaves it's Pen for the once a week gin & slop shopping ritual.

See if you can't place a few cat toys in it so he blames his son Jasper.


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## Sonic Sez (Oct 14, 2020)

NOT Sword Fighter Super said:


> Oh yeah?
> Well I'm going to break into his house and fuck with all his financial records!


Think you're so tough? I'm gonna break in, steal his vests *and* his supply of gin! One way of making bank gone, and no way to ventilate!


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## Forbidden Math (Oct 15, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Adam Condor Kappa, your position is clear. Proceed to the next waypoint.


So, I kind of messed up. I actually replaced Kat with a squirrel and then I rode her off in to the sunset.

Honestly there was nothing I could do.


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## Schmeckel (Oct 15, 2020)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> So, I kind of messed up. I actually replaced Kat with a squirrel and then I rode her off in to the sunset.
> 
> Honestly there was nothing I could do.


Bugged spec-ops mechanics, dood.


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## Forbidden Math (Oct 15, 2020)

Schmeckel said:


> Bugged spec-ops mechanics, dood.


I think it was the lag.


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## DukeMorty (Oct 15, 2020)

This is the Frogger Unit, we are entering through the sewers system and will be sending a Mini Amphibious Drone (MAD)  through the toilet. Reports tell us his extreme potato diet that his maid feeds him has made his shits thick and will make it difficult to send the MAD but we won't waiver. Once the MAD is in and out of the toilet we will have it access his Lemon PC to find those PandaRee nudes that most likely are still on his desktop. Once retrieved we will have the MAD unlock the front door so the other units can go in and retrieve their targets/objectives. After that MAD will retreat back to the toilet and come back to the Frogger Unit. After retrieval of MAD, we will use the Renton sewer system to escape to a nearby LZ and be extracted. Remember everyone Dave has prepared us an ax by the front door to use because he is an idiot and thinks an ax in the front entrance will deter intruders. Also, bring a spray bottle as Intel told us that Jasper's ultimate weakness is a spray bottle. Captain Gutter Falcon out.


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## Punished Benis (Oct 15, 2020)

I tried to disguise myself as Kat so I could dig up Patti laugh at Phil's penis, but some asshole broke in, replaced me with a squirrel, and rode me off into the sunset. Now I'm lost, my ass hurts, and the balls touched so it's gay.


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## Iamfrigide (Oct 15, 2020)

Punished Benis said:


> I tried to disguise myself as Kat so I could dig up Patti laugh at Phil's penis, but some asshole broke in, replaced me with a squirrel, and rode me off into the sunset. Now I'm lost, my ass hurts, and the balls touched so it's gay.


Agent burned.


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## Equinox_ (Oct 15, 2020)

I'll unplug all his wires so he spends a day trying to figure out what the fuck goes where!


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## Bubbly Sink (Oct 15, 2020)

I know this is a joke thread but to the faggots that think it isn't...


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## Henry Wyatt (Oct 15, 2020)

Bubbly Sink said:


> View attachment 1664109
> I know this is a joke thread but to the faggots that think it isn't...


you cant stop me im gonna donate 100 dollars to phil calling him a poopoo head its gonna be epic


Penix said:


> So there's this site that let's you ship cardboard penises...


got a link?


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## gh0stzero (Oct 15, 2020)

Bubbly Sink said:


> View attachment 1664109
> I know this is a joke thread but to the faggots that think it isn't...


who says its a joke? we have a treehouse overlooking the gout mansion and we all chow down doritos while chugging fanta laughing at the fat man play games.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 15, 2020)

tripmix said:


> who says its a joke? we have a treehouse overlooking the gout mansion and we all chow down doritos while chugging fanta laughing at the fat man play games.


Dammit! That was Agent King's Disease performing a diversion tactic so that the Pigstapo will think we're doing this in jest and not for real. Now they'll know that we've got a treehouse  in Renton as our gay op HQ!


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## gh0stzero (Oct 15, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> Dammit! That was Agent King's Disease performing a diversion tactic so that the Pigstapo will think we're doing this in jest and not for real. Now they'll know that we've got a treehouse  in Renton as our gay op HQ!


But there is a lot of trees around the pig sty.

They're not gonna send Squirrel Team 6 up all of the trees looking for us are they.

....are they?


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## Schmeckel (Oct 15, 2020)

_Agent Dust Bunny reporting in.  My position was compromised, but only slightly.  I lost consciousness at some point during the mission due to the overwhelming smell of juniper the room became enveloped in.  Coupled with the methane, stale vestments,  and pungent unwashed body odor, my respirator was as useless as a screen door on a submarine.  I may have to exfil to acquire better protective equipment if I am to continue much further.  

The compound is mostly silent at night, but the juniper is still in abundance.  The silence is punctuated by what sounds like thumbs tapping a screen, the occasional jingle of The Child's medal of honor, and...a sound I can't say I've ever heard before.  It was the muffled sound of a man yelling "AS GOD AS MY WITNESS HE IS BROKEN IN HALF!", which has me completely terrified.  Around 0400, there came the sound of something being sawed.  I do not know what evils go on in this home of depravity, and I'm not sure that I was right for this mission.  

I have since returned to my post.  I hear The Child making his rounds.  I've tucked my dust ghillie back under the rats nest, I can't risk my cover being blown if the target sprays The Child with water.  

I will observe at least one more day.  Rations are running low.  Can't risk microwaving a Hungry Man meal, they are meticulously counted.  Potatoes are arranged in order of size and shape.  This is truly a bizarre place._


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## Forbidden Math (Oct 15, 2020)

Okay, so the first operation was a bust, admittedly mistakes were made. But if I've learned one thing from Phil it's to never change your plan until it's 5 years too late. Operation G.O.U.T. will work, I'm getting that groove back, getting that vibe back, I'm ready for more gay ops I hope you guys are ready too.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 15, 2020)

I've updated the security on the treehouse. The new password is "Kat's in the cradle with a silver spoon".

DON'T TELL ANYBODY!


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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 15, 2020)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> Okay, so the first operation was a bust, admittedly mistakes were made. But if I've learned one thing from Phil it's to never change your plan until it's 5 years too late. Operation G.O.U.T. will work, I'm getting that groove back, getting that vibe back, I'm ready for more gay ops I hope you guys are ready too.


I can be good at gay ops if I want to!


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 15, 2020)

Admiral First Class asshole reporting in, I've readied the "special catnip" for Jasper


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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 15, 2020)

Heyyy Bubba said:


> Admiral First Class asshole reporting in, I've readied the "special catnip" for Jasper


Welcome to the Reehouse, Admiral. You have been assigned leadership over the 2nd Detractor Armada. Guide them well.


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## The Penultimate Warrior (Oct 15, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I've updated the security on the treehouse. The new password is "Kat's in the cradle with a silver spoon".
> 
> DON'T TELL ANYBODY!




Not even Little Boy Blue or the Man on the Moon?


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## Prince Lotor (Oct 15, 2020)

UncleMoeLester said:


> you cant stop me im gonna donate 100 dollars to phil calling him a poopoo head its gonna be epic
> 
> got a link?





			https://shipadick.com/collections/all-dicks-1/products/29-e2-80-b3-dick-custom-message
		


I'm not gonna lie to you soldier. There are dark days on the Ops team where shits flying at you from all directions and you may have to execute some fagot with a Jason Mewes callsign for pulling unsanctioned Ops to try to get on the strike team, just so you can get out alive.

Sad fucker couldn't even get the address right, you can just imagine the collateral damage that caused, not to mention the PR nightmare it caused for Command.

When you're in the shit always watch your 6. You never know when someone you thought was clear is literally going to spend $24.99 + Shipping to try to mail a 29" Cardboard cutout penis with a custom message that reads "kwality kahntent" on it and put all manner of pending Ops in jeopardy.


DiabeticShitheadPhil said:


> Is it artistic if somebody sent Phil a 29" long cardboard dick from Shipadick.com that says "kwality kahntent" on it?
> 
> cuz if not, i totally didn't do that


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## ImagineTheSmell (Oct 15, 2020)

I'm going to send DSP a $1 tip asking him what he thinks about kfc chicken and then charge it back. It's going to be epic!


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 16, 2020)

Operation Detractor Litterbox ready to breach and clear!"


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## Shambler (Oct 16, 2020)

Agent Phalls Thunder reporting in, awaiting confirmation on replacing the cereal with horse feed


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 16, 2020)

Sir, thermal scans indicate the asset is farting into the loveseat.  

Recommend full biohazard armor before deployment.


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## Filthy Greenskin (Oct 16, 2020)

Operation coat-hook sabotage completed with total success. 

Decoy Jasper deployed. 

Platinum vest extraction commencing at 0400 hours.


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## ReentryPhantom (Oct 16, 2020)

---
CONDITION ECHO
CONDITION ECHO

Seq T46-1

START MESSAGE 

79 112 101 114 97 116 105 111 110 32 83 65 86 69 32 74 65 83 80 69 82 32 105 115 32 103 111 46 32 50 57 32 79 67 84 32 50 48 50 48 32 49 57 48 48 32 90 85 76 85 32 114 97 108 108 121 32 111 110 32 112 111 105 110 116 32 68 69 76 84 65 46 32

F798-22pZ

END OF MESSAGE

---


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 16, 2020)

Since the divorce papers gay op didn't work, new plan is to go to the courthouse and file name change papers for Jasper.

Haha! The look on Phil's face when his son's name gets changed to Keith!


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## Phil Ken Sebben (Oct 16, 2020)

Attention Kiwi Command. This is deep cover Spec-Ops agent Stryker with an update on gay-ops plan "House Pest". 

Have located the quarry Jenna, herein named to "Soul Sista" and have given her the address and access code for the Wahkando along with some of the specially tainted cannabis created by Kiwi Labs. As you know, this will increase her feelings of wanting to visit her sister and to get between her and the pig. 

Soul Sista is currently chilled out of her mind on the stuff and is muttering about everything being "whack" and how she "gonna get some" when she gets there. 

Will stand by and await further instructions. Stryker out.


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## SPhobos (Oct 17, 2020)

Operation Reclaw Jasper


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## harbinger (Oct 17, 2020)

New objective: once inside, flush the toilet and do not jiggle the handle.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 17, 2020)

Spud gun loaded and ready.
 Teams idaho russet and team sour cream and chives ready to enter the casserole bowl.


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## Genie The Hedgehog (Oct 17, 2020)

Whose turn is it to buy the next batch of fake tips? My hookup is dry AF fam.


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## Iamfrigide (Oct 17, 2020)

SPhobos said:


> Operation Reclaw Jasper


Operation shower chair


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 17, 2020)

Sarge, I've gone ahead to Fred Meyer and bought up all the tomato sauce and bags of sugar.
 Asset will be unable to produce Goutsludge(tm)


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## Shambler (Oct 17, 2020)

operation gaming chair is go, i'll infiltrate goutopia and build a gaming chair in his "office"
this is going to be hilarious


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## Forbidden Math (Oct 18, 2020)

...---...
--- .--. / --. --- ..- - / .. ... / .- / -... ..- ... - .-.-.-
.--- .- ... .--. . .-. / .. ... / ... - .. .-.. .-.. / -.. . -.-. .-.. .- .-- . -.. .-.-.- / --- ..- .-. / -.-. .-.. .- .-- / .-. . ... - --- .-. .- - .. --- -. / --. ..- -. / ..-. .- .. .-.. . -.. .-.-.-
...---...
...---...


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## Fascist Frederick (Oct 18, 2020)

I am being paid 50,000 United States Dollars to assassinate Phil by a man who claims to have accidentally used Phil's screen name on a WWE game and wants Phil dead because Phil has done a terrible job convincing everyone that it's not really him and the detractors have really been ruining the game for him.

My current plan is to observe the time Phil goes shopping on his day off and perform the hit in the parking lot of Fred Meyer. If anyone has a better idea please post it here. If I use your idea I'll share some of the payment with you.


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## Shambler (Oct 18, 2020)

Murmur said:


> I am being paid 50,000 United States Dollars to assassinate Phil by a man who claims to have accidentally used Phil's screen name on a WWE game and wants Phil dead because Phil has done a terrible job convincing everyone that it's not really him and the detractors have really been ruining the game for him.
> 
> My current plan is to observe the time Phil goes shopping on his day off and perform the hit in the parking lot of Fred Meyer. If anyone has a better idea please post it here. If I use your idea I'll share some of the payment with you.


so here my idea, leave legos near his door, he'll trip and fall into the axe that he keeps next to it
or you could use this information to grab the axe before he does and just swing


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## Fascist Frederick (Oct 18, 2020)

Shambler said:


> so here my idea, leave legos near his door, he'll trip and fall into the axe that he keeps next to it
> or you could use this information to grab the axe before he does and just swing


Hmm, you may be onto something, the client did say there would be a bonus if it looked like an accident.


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## SPhobos (Oct 19, 2020)

I raped Kat as a joke. Lulz!


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 19, 2020)

Murmur said:


> I am being paid 50,000 United States Dollars to assassinate Phil by a man who claims to have accidentally used Phil's screen name on a WWE game and wants Phil dead because Phil has done a terrible job convincing everyone that it's not really him and the detractors have really been ruining the game for him.
> 
> My current plan is to observe the time Phil goes shopping on his day off and perform the hit in the parking lot of Fred Meyer. If anyone has a better idea please post it here. If I use your idea I'll share some of the payment with you.


Okay don't tell anyone but I spoofed the phone number of the used Toyota dealership and told him it's time for an oil change. He should be there around 1pm tomorrow.


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## Fascist Frederick (Oct 19, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Okay don't tell anyone but I spoofed the phone number of the used Toyota dealership and told him it's time for an oil change. He should be there around 1pm tomorrow.


Great work, I'm going to set myself up on the roof of the restaurant across the street with my rifle and wait for him to show up. If this all goes well you've got a bitcoin heading your way.


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## Sonic Sez (Oct 19, 2020)

Informing the delivery guy who chucked his Amazon package over the fence to do the same to Phil's PS5 when it arrives.
Now he'll believe Jeff Bezos is a detractor.


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## Fascist Frederick (Oct 20, 2020)

Goddamn it guys, the assassination attempt failed, I was propped up on the roof ready to snipe Phil when he rolled into the Toyota dealership for the fake oil change that @Sparkletor 2.0 set up, but the lazy bastard sent Kat by herself. So we're back to square one.


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## LyteSydeByll (Oct 21, 2020)

```
if tippingDSP?=(TRUE):
    then;
        subtract tip.amount from DSP();
        add tip.amount to LSB();
```

Successfully hacked DSP's PayPal so his tips go to me instead of him


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## Forbidden Math (Oct 21, 2020)

Finally my plan of posing as a EA representative and giving out thousands of EA Access codes has paid off. We got him boys.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 21, 2020)

Perfect scam. I'm gonna send him $4000 and say it was a mistake and was supposed to be $400. Then I'll get him to send me $3500 in Google Play gift cards. Then I'll charge back the $4k! I just need one of you to send me the $4000 to start the scam. I'll send you the money back, pinky swear...


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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 21, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Perfect scam. I'm gonna send him $4000 and say it was a mistake and was supposed to be $400. Then I'll get him to send me $3500 in Google Play gift cards. Then I'll charge back the $4k! I just need one of you to send me the $4000 to start the scam. I'll send you the money back, pinky swear...


Never knew you were Indian.


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## Mr. Bung (Oct 21, 2020)

Can I take a dump on his welcome mat? I think I'm gonna take a dump on his welcome mat...


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 21, 2020)

Mr. Bung said:


> Can I take a dump on his welcome mat? I think I'm gonna take a dump on his welcome mat...


I bet he has one of those novelty welcome mats that says, "scram"


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## Preferred Penne (Oct 21, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Perfect scam. I'm gonna send him $4000 and say it was a mistake and was supposed to be $400. Then I'll get him to send me $3500 in Google Play gift cards. Then I'll charge back the $4k! I just need one of you to send me the $4000 to start the scam. I'll send you the money back, pinky swear...


While you're at it, can you fix all the hackurs and infestations on my competer?


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 22, 2020)

Preferred Penne said:


> While you're at it, can you fix all the hackurs and infestations on my competer?


Yes, please go to scamme.net and install the program so I can access your computer and find all the Trojans.


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## FamicomGorby (Oct 22, 2020)

Guys I figured it out from Linda Blaire in "How to Get Revenge", all we gotta do is tell the govmint that Dave is dead, sign him up for gay porn, put sugar in his gas tank, and frame him for armed robbery.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 23, 2020)

I've placed the false 7 star Fraudster hulk Hogan jockstrap card in the safe,the real one is back with its rightful owner


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 26, 2020)

Okay, LSB hacked Phil's tips so I just hacked LSB's tips to go to Spoony.


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## gh0stzero (Oct 26, 2020)

Its getting colder guys dont forget to take a blanket to our reehouse.

Also is anyone diabetic asking so I know how much sweets to bring for halloween.

I say we just go straight for the tp'ing and throwing eggs at phils house. I'll bring the treats.


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## Nurse Ratchet (Oct 26, 2020)

Texas Funnyhair said:


> Guys I figured it out from Linda Blaire in "How to Get Revenge", all we gotta do is tell the govmint that Dave is dead, *sign him up for gay porn*, put sugar in his gas tank, and frame him for armed robbery.



^^^This is the _opposite_ of trolling him.^^^


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## Filthy Greenskin (Oct 26, 2020)

I hope you all remembered to ask your parents permission for the halloween slumber party. Also don't forget to fill out your preferred pizza toppings on the top secret google doc.


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## The Penultimate Warrior (Oct 27, 2020)

Texas Funnyhair said:


> Guys I figured it out from Linda Blaire in "How to Get Revenge", all we gotta do is tell the govmint that Dave is dead, sign him up for gay porn, put sugar in his gas tank, and frame him for armed robbery.
> 
> View attachment 1679822




Don't forget to switch his washer fluid for cooking oil. Boy will his face be a picture the first time he tries to clear the screen!


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## Schmeckel (Oct 27, 2020)

The_Penultimate_Warrior said:


> Don't forget to switch his washer fluid for cooking oil. Boy will his face be a picture the first time he tries to clear the screen!


Silly Warrior.  Phil can't drive, he makes his mom/chauffeur/soul-maid/muh-wife*thumbs toward door* drive everywhere.


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## Iamfrigide (Oct 28, 2020)

Schmeckel said:


> Silly Warrior.  Phil can't drive, he makes his mom/chauffeur/soul-maid/muh-wife*thumbs toward door* drive everywhere.


Now I'm not saying I'm a spiteful cunt that's done this or anything, but there certain over the counter substances that once applied never come off a windshield and you have to buy a new one. Would be a real shame if someone put some on his Jap scrap.


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## gh0stzero (Oct 28, 2020)

Iamfrigide said:


> Now I'm not saying I'm a spiteful cunt that's done this or anything, but there certain over the counter substances that once applied never come off a windshield and you have to buy a new one. Would be a real shame if someone put some on his Jap scrap.


No way! If the grown ups caught us we'd all get grounded.


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## Iamfrigide (Oct 28, 2020)

tripmix said:


> No way! If the grown ups caught us we'd all get grounded.


_Cocks slingshot_

Some things are worth it.


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## Equinox_ (Oct 28, 2020)

tripmix said:


> No way! If the grown ups caught us we'd all get grounded.





Iamfrigide said:


> _Cocks slingshot_
> 
> Some things are worth it.



It's okay I have a treehouse we can hide in. It has a sign out front that says "No Grown ups Allowed" and they're legally obligated to follow the rules! Can't get grounded if they can't get to us.


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## gh0stzero (Oct 28, 2020)

No way if I'm bad I wont get Cyberpunk 2077 from santa you're all on your own in this op.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 28, 2020)

tripmix said:


> No way if I'm bad I wont get Cyberpunk 2077 from santa you're all on your own in this op.


My uncle works at CDPR I can get you a free copy from him for Christmas, you just have to drink something called the "goofy juice". I don't know what it is, but all my friends who got free games from him tell me that the goofy juice makes them fall asleep and they wake up with asspain afterwards. Pretty weird.


----------



## Julia Chang (Oct 28, 2020)

I've intercepted PS5 #3 en route to Goutchwitz, DSP still has no idea how bad Sony has been trying to get the only streamer who does raw, unfiltered gameplay to preview their console.
Which streamer/influencer should I send this one to? I already did Superblindman and iJustine.

Please advise, I can't hide in the cushions of the loveseat for long - it's getting cold in the garage (Phil has started wearing long sleeves in a clever ploy to avoid turning on the heat) so I may need to evac soon.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Nov 3, 2020)

Remember when Phil does the summon of all 12 Hulk Hogan pudcards he will have zero attack points for 3 hours


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Nov 3, 2020)

Our secret gay-ops at the Renton Wendy's went off without a hitch! He'll never suspect he got the wrong sandwich on purpose!


----------



## Forbidden Math (Nov 11, 2020)

Operation Next Gen went off without a hitch. Our plan to use subliminal messaging in his chat got him to change his payment method on Amazon costing him those launch day views.


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 11, 2020)

Julia Chang said:


> I've intercepted PS5 #3 en route to Goutchwitz, DSP still has no idea how bad Sony has been trying to get the only streamer who does raw, unfiltered gameplay to preview their console.
> Which streamer/influencer should I send this one to? I already did Superblindman and iJustine.
> 
> Please advise, I can't hide in the cushions of the loveseat for long - it's getting cold in the garage (Phil has started wearing long sleeves in a clever ploy to avoid turning on the heat) so I may need to evac soon.


We'll send the evac helicopter right away.

And when I say evac helicopter I mean we'll send someone wearing one of those helicopter caps riding on a BMX with the back pegs so you can still get a backie out of the pig sty.

You did good Julia Chang his PS5 is really delayed thanks to your efforts


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Nov 11, 2020)

*OFFICIAL DEBRIEFING
OPERATION Next Gen*​*PRIMARY OBJECTIVES:*

Day One Views - Annihilated
Salt Mined - Significantly over the required quota
Tips - Neutralized

*SECONDARY OBJECTIVES:*

Damage to Phil's mental health - You'd think an Atom Bomb hit it
Gold Dust - Successfully gathered
Hairline - Receded from severe stress

*FINAL SCORE: *69420

*FINAL RANK: SSS+*​
Agent JayCee TTT2, you have earned a promotion as well as a bonus. Notice to all operatives to show up with snacks and food in 2 hours. Destination: HQ. Reason: Celebrating Agent JayCee TTT2's promotion.

P.S. To the guy who brought turkey sandwiches, mashed potatoes and Tanqueray gin to the last promotion party, you will be severely reprimanded if you do it again. You know who you are.


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 11, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> *OFFICIAL DEBRIEFING
> OPERATION Next Gen*​*PRIMARY OBJECTIVES:*
> 
> Day One Views - Annihilated
> ...


Aww man we can't have a party on a school night guys or I'll get grounded if I sneak out to our super secret hideout again.  

I'll bring extra candy and soda to the next one though guys.


----------



## Shambler (Nov 11, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> ​
> Agent JayCee TTT2, you have earned a promotion as well as a bonus. Notice to all operatives to show up with snacks and food in 2 hours. Destination: HQ. Reason: Celebrating Agent JayCee TTT2's promotion.
> 
> P.S. To the guy who brought turkey sandwiches, mashed potatoes and Tanqueray gin to the last promotion party, you will be severely reprimanded if you do it again. You know who you are.


i brought some neutral flavored chips


----------



## Forbidden Math (Nov 12, 2020)

So guys, while it's juice box time I have a confession. I am Super Hound and to complicate things further I'm also Phil's mother. I just want my son to move on from this crazy streaming dream of his and get a real job. Sorry I lied to you all but I had to do it to protect my family. I hope I can still come to the Super Secret Sunday Sleepover.


----------



## tzgnilki (Nov 12, 2020)

"Great job on the fake tips with stolen credit cards, now damage his PS5 when it arrives at the courier depot"


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Nov 12, 2020)

Guys! I've found a new batch of stolen credit cards we can use to fake tip and then chargeback Phil! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Best of all? We can print them out ourselves! Phil won't know what hit him! I've attached a picture of the stolen credit cards I've found on the internet.


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 12, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> Guys! I've found a new batch of stolen credit cards we can use to fake tip and then chargeback Phil! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
> Best of all? We can print them out ourselves! Phil won't know what hit him! I've attached a picture of the stolen credit cards I've found on the internet.
> 
> View attachment 1724222


cant we use some of them on inflatable furniture and a mini fridge?


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Nov 12, 2020)

tripmix said:


> cant we use some of them on inflatable furniture and a mini fridge?


No, I told you that if you want something I gave you guys my dad's number and he'll buy and install it in the treeh- Uh, I mean Agent Juliet Oscar India, requests for any new equipment are done by requesting it at the Quartermaster's. Those credit cards I've found are to be used solely for Operation Mentally Ill Chargeback.


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 12, 2020)

yoshitsune said:


> No, I told you that if you want something I gave you guys my dad's number and he'll buy and install it in the treeh- Uh, I mean Agent Juliet Oscar India, requests for any new equipment are done by requesting it at the Quartermaster's. Those credit cards I've found are to be used solely for Operation Mentally Ill Chargeback.


Well we need noisemakers for our bicycles to make them sound like motorbikes.

and yeah some inflatable chairs would be cool for movie night.

whats the next meeting going to be about since I missed JC's party ;-;


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Nov 12, 2020)

_folgers hidden cam voice

We've hidden Hulk Hogans musky wiener and replaced it with a vagina, let's see how Phil reacts_


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Nov 13, 2020)

I tried to derail the PS5 delivery but it still went through. Strangely enough, he got two of the same boxes delivered. One was marked "care of Kat Burnell".

Probably just groceries in a PS5 box. We know his household can't afford two PS5 consoles when he can't pay for food.


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 13, 2020)

can we all laugh at Phil for movie night it'd be cool if we could laugh at phil as he unboxes his PS5 while we watch blade runner 2049 with Joi


----------



## Shambler (Nov 14, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I tried to derail the PS5 delivery but it still went through. Strangely enough, he got two of the same boxes delivered. One was marked "care of Kat Burnell".
> 
> Probably just groceries in a PS5 box. We know his household can't afford two PS5 consoles when he can't pay for food.


funny i stopped by an hour ago and i saw 2 boxes on the doorstep "care of Kat Burnell" and "groceries for the Burnell Residence"
i slapped a tracker on it so we'll see which room it goes into, i bet it has the ps5 for kat in it


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 15, 2020)

Shambler said:


> funny i stopped by an hour ago and i saw 2 boxes on the doorstep "care of Kat Burnell" and "groceries for the Burnell Residence"
> i slapped a tracker on it so we'll see which room it goes into, i bet it has the ps5 for kat in it


I hope you remembered to get the batteries for the fisher price spy equipment we got on  order from amazon. 

It's having to come to my house though so not even the amazon delivery guy will know our super secret hideout location.


----------



## FormerPro (Nov 15, 2020)

I'm currently interning at Amazon's 4th biggest supplier of audio cables and adapters. I've got it on good authority a few of the higher ups here are mentally ill detractors of Phil and have struck a lucrative deal with Sony for them to remove dual audio from the PS5. They also paid off every adopter of the PS5 for them specifically not to mention it in any of their previews. All in an attempt to get Phil into debt by forcing him to buy one of their $4.99 adapters for his stream.


----------



## Shambler (Nov 15, 2020)

tripmix said:


> I hope you remembered to get the batteries for the fisher price spy equipment we got on  order from amazon.
> 
> It's having to come to my house though so not even the amazon delivery guy will know our super secret hideout location.


you didn't say what kind so i got some lemons and copper wire, should work just as good


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 15, 2020)

Shambler said:


> you didn't say what kind so i got some lemons and copper wire, should work just as good


I hope you know what you're doing with that. If the grown ups caught us playing with electricity we could all get grounded.


----------



## Forbidden Math (Nov 15, 2020)

Operation "no way this will work" was a smashing success. Replacing Khet's salt lick with a sugar lick has given her tooth problems. Next up we remove her shoes and rebrand her.


----------



## Shambler (Nov 16, 2020)

tripmix said:


> I hope you know what you're doing with that. If the grown ups caught us playing with electricity we could all get grounded.


don't worry my mom said we can use our garage as a secret base on the weekends and shes cool with it


----------



## BrokeACKMountain (Nov 16, 2020)

Soldiers,

I have carefully studied DSPs GTA3:San Andreas videos to teach myself how to fly an RC plane (henceforth known as Red Baron). I intend to use Red Baron to perform aerial reconnaissance of the goutfort, steal his mail, jam his wifi, and to fly-by the window over the winter months to simulate the sound of lawnmowers.


----------



## gh0stzero (Nov 30, 2020)

Ok inevitably ninstar rune is gonna want to play with us when Phil says hes not his friend any more I think we should all be welcoming and supportive and if someone could bake muffins that'd be great. 

Not for ninstar rune I just really like muffins in our super secret bunker


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 5, 2020)

Operation "Wooden Instrument Player" was a resounding success. The Japanese man I've discovered that was trained by our resident Dark Souls master players in the way of trolling and stream sniping did significant damage to Phil's mental health, enjoyment of the game, daily tips and inflicted additional chargeback casualties. Kudos to everyone who participated in it.

We will celebrate on Sunday at 3pm, make sure to bring some sweets, candies and soda so we can have a proper feast.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 5, 2020)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Operation "Wooden Instrument Player" was a resounding success. The Japanese man I've discovered that was trained by our resident Dark Souls master players in the way of trolling and stream sniping did significant damage to Phil's mental health, enjoyment of the game, daily tips and inflicted additional chargeback casualties. Kudos to everyone who participated in it.
> 
> We will celebrate on Sunday at 3pm, make sure to bring some sweets, candies and soda so we can have a proper feast.


I'll bring the doritos and the fanta.


----------



## LyteSydeByll (Dec 11, 2020)

Who was the one to figure out his phone's passcode unlock it and register for Line without him knowing?


----------



## Forbidden Math (Dec 11, 2020)

LyteSydeByll said:


> Who was the one to figure out his phone's passcode unlock it and register for Line without him knowing?


You know I honestly had no idea he'd join a guild where they use it. I just go around the internet registering "TheyCallMeDSP" for random services. The hard part was hacking in to his phone using my dad's drone and a raspberry pi so that I could use the text message to confirm the account and then delete the message without DSP knowing. We got lucky on this one 'tractors.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 11, 2020)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> You know I honestly had no idea he'd join a guild where they use it. I just go around the internet registering "TheyCallMeDSP" for random services. The hard part was hacking in to his phone using my dad's drone and a raspberry pi so that I could use the text message to confirm the account and then delete the message without DSP knowing. We got lucky on this one 'tractors.


Great work agent Runaway Demon Horse, I'll let you borrow my dad's magazine that I lent you for one week longer- uh I mean you will get a raise.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 11, 2020)

I think @LyteSydeByll and his friend TJGamebox have earned their share of extra candy and soda from the reehouse secret stash.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Dec 11, 2020)

tripmix said:


> I think @LyteSydeByll and his friend TJGamebox have earned their share of extra candy and soda from the reehouse secret stash.


I found some Rolaids in the bottom of grandma's purse. I hope that will suffice.


----------



## tzgnilki (Dec 11, 2020)

class action lawsuit coming along nicely, great to see you all on the zoom meeting today


----------



## Schmeckel (Dec 12, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I found some Rolaids in the bottom of grandma's purse. I hope that will suffice.


I'll pitch in a couple of old Werther's I found in pop-pop's couch.


----------



## Shambler (Dec 12, 2020)

my mom said it was okay for us to use her credit card (just don't go over like 12 bucks) i'm super serial, i left the card info in drop point #3 use it wisely


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Dec 13, 2020)

We've trained the next Dsp to ensure a new generation of mobile game whales 



			https://nypost.com/2020/12/12/this-6-year-old-racked-up-over-16k-on-his-moms-credit-card/amp/


----------



## UncleTusky (Dec 13, 2020)

Heyyy Bubba said:


> We've trained the next Dsp to ensure a new generation of mobile game whales
> 
> https://nypost.com/2020/12/12/this-6-year-old-racked-up-over-16k-on-his-moms-credit-card/amp/



ABORT ABORT ABORT Agent Hector Bravo, your use of "Sonic Heroes" to promote whaling means we're going after the wrong target! Christian Chandler is not to be harmed by the Gay Ops of the Super Secret Reehouse!



TheKatIsNowGone said:


> You know I honestly had no idea he'd join a guild where they use it. I just go around the internet registering "TheyCallMeDSP" for random services. The hard part was hacking in to his phone using my dad's drone and a raspberry pi so that I could use the text message to confirm the account and then delete the message without DSP knowing. We got lucky on this one 'tractors.



This is an amazing coincidence, I've been creating hundreds of fake WWE discord accounts and shilling LINE in there to entrap Phil into looking like an online gambling addict. Great work framing him Agent Golf October Uniform Tango!


----------



## Swirling weeb (Dec 14, 2020)

Here’s the plan fellers 
1• we get someone on the inside of Fred Myer
2•we get the inside man to form a relationship with the stallion 
3• they get invited to dinner
4• they put sleeping pills on the potato casserole that kat made
5• the barn animals pass out
6• inside man takes crusty iPhone and deletes wwe champions account
7• liberate jasper and/or ps5 and 6000 dollar coffee maker 
8•?????
=
profits


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Dec 15, 2020)

All dspfans will have their icons changed to this 



Spoiler


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Dec 15, 2020)

Okay, Christmas Eve I'm going to sneak into the Wakando. 

I'm going to replace the Snoopy desk calendar Kat bought Phil with a lump of coal. 

Phil is going to cry again like when he was 17 years old and found out Santa wasn't real.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 15, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Phil is going to cry again like when he was 17 years old and found out Santa wasn't real.


W-wait... Santa isn't real?


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 15, 2020)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> W-wait... Santa isn't real?


No, sorry we thought you knew.

You know the tooth fairy isn't real either right?



Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Okay, Christmas Eve I'm going to sneak into the Wakando.
> 
> I'm going to replace the Snoopy desk calendar Kat bought Phil with a lump of coal.
> 
> Phil is going to cry again like when he was 17 years old and found out Santa wasn't real.



Wow Phil was 17 once? what a boomer lol


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Dec 15, 2020)

I have formed a team of elite forces for our next gay operation. This team was hand picked to combat the "Hate Army 86". The team has been named "Love Navy 69". Why? Because love makes us stronger. Nothing will defeat the power of love!

Our current mission is to hack into Phil's computer and install Windows 10. Phil won't be able to stream for months or maybe even a year while he struggles to learn an entirely new operating system! Brilliant!


----------



## TheGoutburglar (Dec 15, 2020)

Are you making up the part about Phil thinking Santa was real until age 17? Because if you aren't, holy shit does that explain a lot.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 15, 2020)

tripmix said:


> You know the tooth fairy isn't real either right?


You gotta be... guys I think I'll need a moment...


Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I have formed a team of elite forces for our next gay operation. This team was hand picked to combat the "Hate Army 86". The team has been named "Love Navy 69". Why? Because love makes us stronger. Nothing will defeat the power of love!
> 
> Our current mission is to hack into Phil's computer and install Windows 10. Phil won't be able to stream for months or maybe even a year while he struggles to learn an entirely new operating system! Brilliant!


Roger that, I have already prepared a flash drive with Windows 10 on it. I've left it at Strategic Point B.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 15, 2020)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> You gotta be... guys I think I'll need a moment...
> 
> Roger that, I have already prepared a flash drive with Windows 10 on it. I've left it at Strategic Point B.


RTB for cookies and milk. We can't have a field agent out there who just learned Santa and the Tooth Fairy isn't real.

That's an order!


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 15, 2020)

tripmix said:


> RTB for cookies and milk. We can't have a field agent out there who just learned Santa and the Tooth Fairy isn't real.
> 
> That's an order!


Roger that! I will eliminate the threat "Grandma's Cookies" at HQ and neutralize the secondary target "hot milk"! Over! Agent JOI, take the flash drive with Windows 10 and take it to Strategic Point B in my stead!


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Dec 15, 2020)

TheGoutburglar said:


> Are you making up the part about Phil thinking Santa was real until age 17? Because if you aren't, holy shit does that explain a lot.


Off topic, Phil never gave a exact age when he learned Santa wasn't real. He does tell the story of how one year at family Christmas all the kids got coal as a joke. Phil got the biggest lump and he cried and cried.

Phil also admitted that he thought wrestling was real until the mid 2000's. Phil graduated in 2000. Phil was in college when he realized wrestling was fake. He then realized he sounded like a moron and changed it to the mid 1990's.


----------



## TheGoutburglar (Dec 15, 2020)

That explains a lot.


----------



## PutridElephant (Dec 15, 2020)

What's the status of the class acktion lolsuit that Nicky Rackets is heading up?  This second flank op still green lit?


----------



## UncleTusky (Dec 15, 2020)

PutridElephant said:


> What's the status of the class acktion lolsuit that Nicky Rackets is heading up? This second flank op still green lit?



Phil outsmarted us doods, he's just ignoring the summons! How can we take him to court if he doesn't give us permission to sue him?

There's only one way to beat him now: Somebody will have to troll tip him the whole lolsuit one sentence at a time.

The brave autist who does this will have first choice of toppings on pizza if s/he survives


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 15, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I have formed a team of elite forces for our next gay operation. This team was hand picked to combat the "Hate Army 86". The team has been named "Love Navy 69". Why? Because love makes us stronger. Nothing will defeat the power of love!
> 
> Our current mission is to hack into Phil's computer and install Windows 10. Phil won't be able to stream for months or maybe even a year while he struggles to learn an entirely new operating system! Brilliant!





Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> You gotta be... guys I think I'll need a moment...
> 
> Roger that, I have already prepared a flash drive with Windows 10 on it. I've left it at Strategic Point B.





Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Roger that! I will eliminate the threat "Grandma's Cookies" at HQ and neutralize the secondary target "hot milk"! Over! Agent JOI, take the flash drive with Windows 10 and take it to Strategic Point B in my stead!


I think we should double it up with a linux windows dual boot. He won't know what to do at the bootloader because he wont get stream chat loaded up to tell him which buttons to press; the ones that say ubuntu or windows 10 it'll be hillarious

Remember to use mrstupid12 as his password.

Also you said you already left the flash drive at point B I don't need to take it there. Its ok, its been a rough day for you. I wont let your efforts be in vain though this op will succeed!


----------



## tzgnilki (Dec 15, 2020)

important update regarding the class action lawsuit, check the discord


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Dec 16, 2020)

I've gotten app store approval to release "hulk hogan's boner slap adventure" so I can procure those sweet tardbuxx. I'll give 40 percent of proceeds to Null


----------



## harbinger (Dec 16, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Off topic, Phil never gave a exact age when he learned Santa wasn't real. He does tell the story of how one year at family Christmas all the kids got coal as a joke. Phil got the biggest lump and he cried and cried.
> 
> Phil also admitted that he thought wrestling was real until the mid 2000's. Phil graduated in 2000. Phil was in college when he realized wrestling was fake. He then realized he sounded like a moron and changed it to the mid 1990's.


I’m sure he’d never admit to it, but I’m certain he cried and cried when he found out everyone let Hulk Hogan beat them back in the day and that, Hulkamania, in fact, did not run wild on them.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Dec 16, 2020)

I had to pull a few favors, but I was able to get someone to pay Charon a few extra coins to deny Phil passage on the river Styx. Haha! When Phil dies he will not be able to enter the afterlife!


----------



## UncleTusky (Dec 16, 2020)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I had to pull a few favors, but I was able to get someone to pay Charon a few extra coins to deny Phil passage on the river Styx. Haha! When Phil dies he will not be able to enter the afterlife!



Oh man I hope Mom and Dad will let us stay up late to watch Phil's debunk stream saying Charon never even asked for money and was fine being paid in exposure!


----------



## Shambler (Dec 17, 2020)

so i've got a plan to sneak into Gout Palace and replace all his gamer posters with really shitty versions


----------



## Coin Ops (Dec 17, 2020)

Shambler said:


> so i've got a plan to sneak into Gout Palace and replace all his gamer posters with really shitty versions


Be sure to hide Tevin's face in them.


----------



## SPhobos (Dec 17, 2020)

Operation Put Phil's Condo On A Big Truck And Drive It To The Grand Canyon While He's Sleeping So That When He Wakes Up And Steps Outside He Falls Off A Cliff is complete. Stay tuned.


----------



## Prince Lotor (Dec 17, 2020)

Shambler said:


> so i've got a plan to sneak into Gout Palace and replace all his gamer posters with really shitty versions


Leave the one with the 'Nigger stole my bike' from 'Punch-Out!!' please. Phil even laughs about how the 'Nigger stole my bike' meme is the reason he got it.
Also good luck and Godspeed finding shittier versions of these.
Timestamped @ 7m27s


----------



## Shambler (Dec 18, 2020)

Prince Lotor said:


> Leave the one with the 'Nigger stole my bike' from 'Punch-Out!!' please. Phil even laughs about how the 'Nigger stole my bike' meme is the reason he got it.
> Also good luck and Godspeed finding shittier versions of these.
> Timestamped @ 7m27s


i've got a better idea, i'm going to replace it with a nigger stealing HIS car, paid the guy like 200 bucks said he'd do it wednesday, i'm waiting in the bush to get the picture


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Dec 18, 2020)

Better idea. "Nigger Blacked My Wife (In a Yellow Thong)" oil on canvas 2020.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 18, 2020)

This weekend could be the last super secret meeting before christmas. Make sure you all bring your top secret plans with you, hide them in your sleeping bag or something.

Also this could be last time to get anything you're going to need over christmas out of our secret hide out of there.

So far I like the plans of swapping Phils art with stuff but we should do it with the discord leaks, the line account and the champions roster. I guess we can hide Tevin in there as well for funsies.


----------



## UncleTusky (Dec 18, 2020)

tripmix said:


> This weekend could be the last super secret meeting before christmas. Make sure you all bring your top secret plans with you, hide them in your sleeping bag or something.



Can we have a Movie Night? My stepdad says we can borrow his flatscreen and run some extension cords from the playroom into the REEhouse if we promise to go to bed on time!



tripmix said:


> Also this could be last time to get anything you're going to need over christmas out of our secret hide out of there.



Our REEhouse is meant to be fun but these are still super secret gay ops! Everybody make sure Phil can't find our trolling plans when we go home for Christmas!


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 18, 2020)

twattycake said:


> Can we have a Movie Night? My stepdad says we can borrow his flatscreen and run some extension cords from the playroom into the REEhouse if we promise to go to bed on time!
> 
> 
> 
> Our REEhouse is meant to be fun but these are still super secret gay ops! Everybody make sure Phil can't find our trolling plans when we go home for Christmas!


I mean yeah we can we made some promises about movies at Halloween and I know Blade Runner movies aren't halloween candidates it just sucks to make that commitment.

Blade runner and Blade Runner 2049 might over run some bed times of your guys I need Joi to be present for both she's essential and perfect in every way.


----------



## Forbidden Math (Dec 19, 2020)

So I've been bribing Jasper with catnip to get up on DSP's tv stand and paw at the TV. I can't make the drop tomorrow though so one of you go out to the northern part of the fence/border wall and make the deal. It's way past everyone's bed time so I forged a note from your mothers saying it was okay.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 19, 2020)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> So I've been bribing Jasper with catnip to get up on DSP's tv stand and paw at the TV. I can't make the drop tomorrow though so one of you go out to the northern part of the fence/border wall and make the deal. It's way past everyone's bed time so I forged a note from your mothers saying it was okay.


I think I can manage it, I'll need to borrow a cart to wheel my dad's ladder there so I can get over the 2 foot tall fence though.


----------



## Schmeckel (Dec 19, 2020)

tripmix said:


> I think I can manage it, I'll need to borrow a cart to wheel my dad's ladder there so I can get over the 2 foot tall fence though.


I'd help, but I've only got a step-ladder.  I never knew my real ladder.

You might want to bring some kind of rope to rappel down the other side of the fence.  That kind of drop is all kinds of dangerous.  Last thing we need is a kiwi down in gout territory.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 19, 2020)

Schmeckel said:


> I'd help, but I've only got a step-ladder.  I never knew my real ladder.
> 
> You might want to bring some kind of rope to rappel down the other side of the fence.  That kind of drop is all kinds of dangerous.  Last thing we need is a kiwi down in gout territory.


Don't worry I'll go with broccoli. If I end up captured in gout territory I'll eat the broccoli so I don't reveal any of our secrets.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 20, 2020)

Now that this has been successful I've got a confession to make. I've gone alpha protocol and started my own op. I contacted Jasper behind the scenes and explained to him that the reason he got declawed was his dad made the evil veterinarian do it. He was pissed. I then instructed him that the best way to annoy his dad is to come and bother him and start chewing on the wires when he's playing games that he can't pause ahn da fly, like CoD or Street Fighter.


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 20, 2020)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Now that this has been successful I've got a confession to make. I've gone alpha protocol and started my own op. I contacted Jasper behind the scenes and explained to him that the reason he got declawed was his dad made the evil veterinarian do it. He was pissed. I then instructed him that the best way to annoy his dad is to come and bother him and start chewing on the wires when he's playing games that he can't pause ahn da fly, like CoD or Street Fighter.


That's dangerous telling Jasper to chew on wires though.  

Also I don't know whos socks were left behind at the last reehouse meeting but my mom washed them thinking they were mine so let me know if you lost socks.


----------



## TheTractor (Dec 20, 2020)

tripmix said:


> That's dangerous telling Jasper to chew on wires though.
> 
> Also I don't know whos socks were left behind at the last reehouse meeting but my mom washed them thinking they were mine so let me know if you lost socks.


I think it's mine; I also have one of yours in my basket I haven't told my mom to wash them yet.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 21, 2020)

tripmix said:


> That's dangerous telling Jasper to chew on wires though.


Understood. I contacted him behind the scenes again and told him to stop chewing on them and instead try to either knock down the TV or pull on the mess of wires Dave has so all his electronics collapse in glorious fashion.


----------



## TheTractor (Dec 21, 2020)

Hey next weekend can we watch something else than the last bladerunner? Tripmix gave my back the blanket I lent him for the movie and it's all crusty.


----------



## UncleTusky (Dec 21, 2020)

TheTractor said:


> Hey next weekend can we watch something else than the last bladerunner? Tripmix gave my back the blanket I lent him for the movie and it's all crusty.



My stepdad says "Die Hard" is the greatest Christmas movie of them all but he also says it's only for grown-ups. Maybe he'll lend it to us when we explain to him that Christmas is for everybody!


----------



## gh0stzero (Dec 21, 2020)

TheTractor said:


> Hey next weekend can we watch something else than the last bladerunner? Tripmix gave my back the blanket I lent him for the movie and it's all crusty.


It was a happy dream it wasn't like I was scratching my leg with it.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Dec 22, 2020)

Phil's getting a copy of this from Khet



			https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_with_Muscles


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Dec 23, 2020)

I'm going to delay the Christmas Whale by putting a huge plate of tasty krill in his path


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 29, 2020)

Great job to whoever programmed those 3 month old follower bots and made them post ascii art of Phil gamerfacing, nutting scratching his leg, pictures of cocks, ass and balls, goatse, big tits, wide hips, big asses, Shrek with tits and LyteSydeBill. Also, big ups to the team in charge of fake tips.
This gay op was a great success.


----------



## Full Race Replay (Dec 29, 2020)

Hey all good job tonight but don’t forget to make new bots and make them follow Phil’s channel but don’t write anything yet. so that we can get them into the follower only chats as soon as possible. And also sub and cheer with the bots so that they look like Phil’s fans


----------



## TheTractor (Jan 5, 2021)

Operation Yellow Danger is successfull; the roadtrip to Ontario went well; the idea of dressing up Tripmix as a skimpy 8 years old girl as bait indeed worked.

The target is now in a small cage in my van; I installed a small TV facing it with old episodes of the Olson twins. It's distracting him well but the back of my van is now a cum stained mess, I'm NOT cleaning that shit. 

On my way to extraction point.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 11, 2021)

Ok guys new op we need to get a backup server for our communications.

I think I got an old IBM pc from 1997 in the attic


----------



## Full Race Replay (Jan 11, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Ok guys new op we need to get a backup server for our communications.
> 
> I think I got an old IBM pc from 1997 in the attic


I found a good backup. We can go to Phil’s chat and talk to each other without donating he never reads those messages.


----------



## DarkScrubPhil (Jan 11, 2021)

I've broken into Phil's Wakando and installed a copy of this forum on his computer.  Just ignore his complaints about his computer being "slow".


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jan 12, 2021)

WHOEVER KEEPS CHANGING THE WALLPAPER ON OUR WIN 3.1 MACHINE, STOP IT NOW!

IT'S CLOUDS AND I WANT IT TO STAY CLOUDS! I WILL PULL UP THE ROPE LADDER IF IT HAPPENS AGAIN!

Also we need the new issue of Penthouse if anyone has a brother over 18.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 12, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> WHOEVER KEEPS CHANGING THE WALLPAPER ON OUR WIN 3.1 MACHINE, STOP IT NOW!
> 
> IT'S CLOUDS AND I WANT IT TO STAY CLOUDS! I WILL PULL UP THE ROPE LADDER IF IT HAPPENS AGAIN!
> 
> Also we need the new issue of Penthouse if anyone has a brother over 18.


Just use ask jeeves to show us pictures of boobs.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Jan 12, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Also we need the new issue of Penthouse if anyone has a brother over 18.


I'll let my dad know. ETA on the new Penthouse issue being delivered to HQ is tomorrow.


----------



## Schmeckel (Jan 12, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> WHOEVER KEEPS CHANGING THE WALLPAPER ON OUR WIN 3.1 MACHINE, STOP IT NOW!


Look at this guy, not using DOS to change directories.

I didn't think we were using such advanced hardware.


----------



## tzgnilki (Jan 12, 2021)

which one of you have gone rogue, get back in the treehouse




SOURCE


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 12, 2021)

tzgnilki said:


> which one of you have gone rogue, get back in the treehouse
> 
> View attachment 1842349
> 
> SOURCE


Oh no oh god you are so grounded talking to a grown up online.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jan 13, 2021)

Think about this, we can all come and hang out in the treehouse by ourselves but Phil had to have parental supervision to go upstairs in his house to play He-Man.


----------



## tzgnilki (Jan 13, 2021)

great job to agent 1488 who managed to infiltrate the gout mansion and turn the volume knob down, causing an hour of blaming cables, computers, tvs, consoles, headphones, obs and capture cards for an audio error


----------



## Shambler (Jan 13, 2021)

so who's on snack duty next, things like this deserve to be remembered, truly a crushing blow to the pig


----------



## blahblahblah678 (Jan 14, 2021)

We need to funnel all our messages to our inside agent, or shall I say sleeper kitty, so he can cause mayhem when granted access to the Wakhando office. Agent Jasper is getting really close to tipping Phil’s TV and causing unspeakable hardship to Philbert by depriving him of one of his streaming essentials: an electronic item no less, which, as a video game streamer , he does NOT have according to initial bankruptcy filings.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 14, 2021)

Shambler said:


> so who's on snack duty next, things like this deserve to be remembered, truly a crushing blow to the pig.


I thought we were all putting a dollar in the piggy bank in the reehouse.

Remember what Phil said as little as a dollar helps.

We can all go to the store and get what we want that way.


----------



## Generic_Detractor2021 (Jan 14, 2021)

tripmix said:


> I thought we were all putting a dollar in the piggy bank in the reehouse.
> 
> Remember what Phil said as little as a dollar helps.
> 
> We can all go to the store and get what we want that way.


I'm not gonna lie guys, I've been taking money out of the piggy bank to buy ding dongs and ho ho's. Sorry


----------



## UncleTusky (Jan 14, 2021)

Generic_Detractor2021 said:


> I'm not gonna lie guys, I've been taking money out of the piggy bank to buy ding dongs and ho ho's. Sorry



My Mom says that's OK so long as you bought enough to share.
.....you did buy some to share with us, right????


----------



## Generic_Detractor2021 (Jan 14, 2021)

twattycake said:


> My Mom says that's OK so long as you bought enough to share.
> .....you did buy some to share with us, right????


I was hungry..


----------



## blahblahblah678 (Jan 14, 2021)

$1 can buy a decent sized bag of Clancy’s Potato Chips from Aldi.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 14, 2021)

Generic_Detractor2021 said:


> I was hungry..


You do have food at home right? Eat some of that before coming up to the reehouse.

If you don't have a lot of food at home I can come around with a big pot of chilli.


----------



## Generic_Detractor2021 (Jan 14, 2021)

tripmix said:


> You do have food at home right? Eat some of that before coming up to the reehouse.
> 
> If you don't have a lot of food at home I can come around with a big pot of chilli.


You dont understand, I came up from the mean streets of Connecticut! Practically a ghetto! I once heard a gunshot! So we didnt have a lot of food. Despite my Dad making over 100k a year.. Anyways, I'll put some pennies back in the piggy bank! Like 50 bits or something.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 14, 2021)

Generic_Detractor2021 said:


> You dont understand, I came up from the mean streets of Connecticut! Practically a ghetto! I once heard a gunshot! So we didnt have a lot of food. Despite my Dad making over 100k a year.. Anyways, I'll put some pennies back in the piggy bank! Like 50 bits or something.


Don't do that you don't want the fellers calling you a 50 bit poopy head do you?


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Jan 14, 2021)

Last night an elite team of Haxx0Rrz inserted heterosexual content into Scopely's servers keyed to noting when Phil reaches near climax and made him look at yukky vaginas right when he thought he was getting boners smacked together. Operation Straight plan for the gay man went off without a hitch.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Jan 15, 2021)

ALERT! ALERT!
Someone stole all of our paper and writing supplies! When I saw that all of them were gone I tried to look for a possible perpetrator. All I could hear were sounds of a wheelchair wheeling away in the distance. I hope they weren't used for something nefarious...


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 15, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> ALERT! ALERT!
> Someone stole all of our paper and writing supplies! When I saw that all of them were gone I tried to look for a possible perpetrator. All I could hear were sounds of a wheelchair wheeling away in the distance. I hope they weren't used for something nefarious...


Oh no, they didn't take my colouring in books did they?

I got those for christmas  I was hoping to do more of them tonight when we all hung out in the reehouse


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Jan 15, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Oh no, they didn't take my colouring in books did they?
> 
> I got those for christmas  I was hoping to do more of them tonight when we all hung out in the reehouse


They're still here, thank God. It's just that all of our blank pieces of paper, pencils (including colored ones) and erasers are gone.


----------



## blahblahblah678 (Jan 15, 2021)

Funny enough, I think our safety scissors are still here.


----------



## Shambler (Jan 15, 2021)

whoever stole our supplies also stole my limited edition totally real WWE supplement for D&D 5th edition


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Jan 15, 2021)

I've replaced Phil's goutaxe with a dragon dildo,  I found it in Khets office.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 15, 2021)

Heyyy Bubba said:


> I've replaced Phil's goutaxe with a dragon dildo,  I found it in Khets office.


whats a dragon dildo? ask jeeves is acting weird after me and sparkletor used it to look at boobs


----------



## Full Race Replay (Jan 15, 2021)

I'll leave this here to distract the feds while we talk about the death threats in the main thread.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Jan 15, 2021)

tripmix said:


> whats a dragon dildo? ask jeeves is acting weird after me and sparkletor used it to look at boobs


It's a big green dildo with imitation dragon scales

The elite haxx00r team will make the Randy Orton gold schlong card morph into Leanna once Phil's iPhone camera registers his o face tonight


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jan 16, 2021)

tripmix said:


> whats a dragon dildo? ask jeeves is acting weird after me and sparkletor used it to look at boobs


Hey, I was trying to find information on birds native to the Pacific islands and thought there might be a documentary from the British Broadcasting Company. How was I supposed to know not to search "boobies" and "bbc"?


----------



## gh0stzero (Jan 16, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Hey, I was trying to find information on birds native to the Pacific islands and thought there might be a documentary from the British Broadcasting Company. How was I supposed to know not to search "boobies" and "bbc"?


I'm not blaming you, remember I tried looking for "anime joi" to find anime versions of Ana from blade runner and it turned up with anime porn, some of them with octopuses.

Its easily done.


----------



## Generic_Detractor2021 (Jan 20, 2021)

Operation fly over Phil's house and parachute down is a massive success, guys!! Good job!!


----------



## UncleTusky (Feb 8, 2021)

Great work today guys, agent Juliet Alpha Sierra Papa Echo Romeo was able to infiltrate Phil's bedroom and attack him while he slept! Now he will never be able to do his taxes on time!

My mom and stepdad are really proud of me for getting all A's last year in school so they're OK with us having a pizza party in the REEHouse to celebrate, can you all make it?


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Feb 8, 2021)

twattycake said:


> Great work today guys, agent Juliet Alpha Sierra Papa Echo Romeo was able to infiltrate Phil's bedroom and attack him while he slept! Now he will never be able to do his taxes on time!
> 
> My mom and stepdad are really proud of me for getting all A's last year in school so they're OK with us having a pizza party in the REEHouse to celebrate, can you all make it?


I'll bring the light ranch.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Feb 12, 2021)

The trigger phrase to reactivate Jasper's Catninja assault mode is "Catnip poopietrim". 
It only works if you can sound like reliable sitcom mainstay Richard Kind but I'm sure one of you can do it.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Feb 12, 2021)

Quantum Diabetes said:


> The trigger phrase to reactivate Jasper's Catninja assault mode is "Catnip poopietrim".
> It only works if you can sound like reliable sitcom mainstay Richard Kind but I'm sure one of you can do it.


OH SHIT! I accidentally triggered Jasper's MKUltra killswitch! JASPER NOOOOOOOOOO IT'S TOO EARLY!


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Feb 13, 2021)

REMINDER:

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. Today is the last chance to decorate and hang up your envelopes for the valentine's card exchange. Due to someone's mom complaining, not going to name names @tripmix we will not be exchanging conversation hearts as some people's moms @tripmix said they are too sexual.


----------



## gh0stzero (Feb 13, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> REMINDER:
> 
> Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. Today is the last chance to decorate and hang up your envelopes for the valentine's card exchange. Due to someone's mom complaining, not going to name names @tripmix we will not be exchanging conversation hearts as some people's moms @tripmix said they are too sexual.


I swear I was just trying to find pictures Anime Joi from blade runner I wasn't trying to find anything lewd like anime jerk off instruction.

If you mean my incident with @TheTractor 's blanket it was a happy dream it wasn't like I was jerking off.

...ok maybe a little.

BUT ONLY WHEN JOI WAS ON SCREEN!


----------



## UncleTusky (Feb 15, 2021)

Great news, Phil never realized the weatherman was a deep cover REEhouse agent and couldn't order delivery when he was blindsided by the snowstorm!

Another successful gay op, way to ruin Phil's Valentine's date with Kat everybody!



Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. Today is the last chance to decorate and hang up your envelopes for the valentine's card exchange. Due to someone's mom complaining, not going to name names @tripmix we will not be exchanging conversation hearts as some people's moms @tripmix said they are too sexual.



My stepdad says it's not a big deal since we're big kids now and that he was glad I was honest with him and told a trusted adult. All I have to do now is talk to a nice lady from Social Services about who gave me the card.


----------



## SPhobos (Feb 15, 2021)

Operation Use A Snow Machine To Create 8 Inches Of Snow Around Phil's House To Trick Him Into Thinking He's Snowed In has been a wild success.


----------



## Swirling weeb (Feb 15, 2021)

Ladies 
I am pleased to announce that operation “freeze the house” is underway as we speak I have trained Renton’s squirrels to drop small water balloons around Phil’s driveway they will be frozen under two inches of solid ice by tomorrow morning  not even the Uber eats driver will be able to deliver the pig’s grub because of the amount of ice now that’s what I call a chill stream


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Feb 15, 2021)

Thanks everyone, the Reehouse Valentine's Day party was a huge success. I am a little concerned about the card from "Seekrit Admirror" who wants to "poz my neg hole" whatever that means.

Keep up the good work. Our new password is "dead vest streak". Don't tell anybody.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Feb 16, 2021)

Guys we really need to step it up with the secret Reehouse ops. Yesterday's op was a complete failure, we were left seething and coping and we took many casualties from the Giant Whale's ultimate attack. I propose we activate Khet's MKUltra killswitch sooner rather than later.


----------



## gh0stzero (Feb 16, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Guys we really need to step it up with the secret Reehouse ops. Yesterday's op was a complete failure, we were left seething and coping and we took many casualties from the Giant Whale's ultimate attack. I propose we activate Khet's MKUltra killswitch sooner rather than later.


We should activate it when Phil is on stream for the most funsies.

Is her trigger word still T-POSE FOR JESUS?

It'll be yet another smoking gun in the crate of smoking guns to add to our WWE champions thread.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Feb 17, 2021)

That seekret weather control machine I bought just to slow down his doordash orders really has paid off. Project Taterstorm was a success.


----------



## PutridElephant (Feb 18, 2021)

Can someone bring some promagrapples to the next meetup?  I've never had one and I want to be as cool as a Googler.


----------



## gh0stzero (Feb 18, 2021)

Quantum Diabetes said:


> That seekret weather control machine I bought just to slow down his doordash orders really has paid off. Project Taterstorm was a success.


Wow it really worked? Nice; I thought it would be a scam since you got it mail order from the back of a comic book.


----------



## UncleTusky (Feb 18, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Guys we really need to step it up with the secret Reehouse ops. Yesterday's op was a complete failure, we were left seething and coping and we took many casualties from the Giant Whale's ultimate attack. I propose we activate Khet's MKUltra killswitch sooner rather than later.



Don't panic Agent Papa Bravo Echo, target codename Giant Whale is known to lash out as an act of desperation. We need to press the attack on our own and save Kat's MKUltra killswitch for our campaign against his dying parents!



tripmix said:


> We should activate it when Phil is on stream for the most funsies.
> 
> Is her trigger word still T-POSE FOR JESUS?



Oh no.... oh no.... that was Super Secret Agent Brazy Mamo's killswitch word.... fellas I think she's about to do something really terrible


----------



## Draventren (Feb 18, 2021)

Ever since the implementation of the pignigma code for tips, myself and the other codebreaker 'tractors have been trying to crack it. Every time we figure it out, the code changes, so we've been hitting brick walls constantly. Until today. While reviewing the broken codes, we finally have a way to build an algorithm to crack the code using one phrase that never changes at the end of the messages:

"Tips help the most right now, I need to pay my basic bills"


----------



## gh0stzero (Feb 19, 2021)

twattycake said:


> Oh no.... oh no.... that was Super Secret Agent Brazy Mamo's killswitch word.... fellas I think she's about to do something really terrible


Relax she needs to hear it not read it....

....I think?



Draventren said:


> Ever since the implementation of the pignigma code for tips, myself and the other codebreaker 'tractors have been trying to crack it. Every time we figure it out, the code changes, so we've been hitting brick walls constantly. Until today. While reviewing the broken codes, we finally have a way to build an algorithm to crack the code using one phrase that never changes at the end of the messages:
> 
> "Tips help the most right now, I need to pay my basic bills"





twattycake said:


> Don't panic Agent Papa Bravo Echo, target codename Giant Whale



Now that we got into codebreaking and secret agent names. Can my secret agent name be Agent Joi?


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Feb 19, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Now that we got into codebreaking and secret agent names. Can my secret agent name be Agent Joi?


Agent Juliett Oscar India, your secret agent name already is Agent Joi and has been from the start.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Feb 25, 2021)

I'm giving you all plenty of notice. If you do not wear green on St. Patrick's day you will get pinched.


----------



## Schmeckel (Feb 25, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I'm giving you all plenty of notice. If you do not wear green on St. Patrick's day you will get pinched.


Don't threaten me with a good time.


----------



## The Penultimate Warrior (Feb 25, 2021)

Lads, Joyful Oblovion has destroyed us by giving Phil $350. I think we just need to accept we lost and abandon the mission before we get owned even harder.


----------



## actually (Feb 25, 2021)

The_Penultimate_Warrior said:


> Lads, Joyful Oblovion has destroyed us by giving Phil $350. I think we just need to accept we lost and abandon the mission before we get owned even harder.


But I haven't finished my Doritos and Fanta yet!


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Feb 25, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I'm giving you all plenty of notice. If you do not wear green on St. Patrick's day you will get pinched.


I'll be carrying a tub of this


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Feb 26, 2021)

Whoa! Do you have an older brother who will buy you stuff?

See if he will buy us some nudie mags (for the articals)


----------



## gh0stzero (Mar 2, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Fort JOI is what @tripmix calls the Reehouse. I don't know why.



Its Fort Joi.

JOI is something different remember when we googled anime JOI?

And fort Joi isn't what I called the reehouse its what I called that little mini fort I made with stuff I found and I still have my colouring books and the Joi poster I made on A3 paper in there. You can borrow the coloured pencils but leave the Joi poster alone.


----------



## UncleTusky (Mar 12, 2021)

Gramh said:


> I haven't played Divinity 2 but it's on the master list so I don't want it spoiled for the sake of following our squealing porker's escapades into the meat of the game, but I've played enough CRPGs to delight in how the lack of handholding and straightforward cheese builds is going to make this a grind and a game of chicken to see who's going to give out first, the paypiggies wallets or DSP's pride.





tripmix said:


> Its Fort Joi.




This used to be Super Secret with the codeword Papa India Golf Romeo Oscar Alpha Charlie Hope, but REEhouse higher-ups say it's safe to share now: "Divinity Original Sin" only "won" the poll because undercover agents manipulated the GUI and SSH scripts to steal votes from "Bugsnax: Phil's Game of the Year Edition ". Operation Poll Rigger has been a smash success! Doritos and Fanta at 1545 hours ZULU time sharp!


----------



## Generic_Detractor2021 (Mar 12, 2021)

twattycake said:


> Doritos and Fanta at 1545 hours ZULU time sharp!


I'm just here for the Doritos and Fanta.


----------



## gh0stzero (Mar 25, 2021)

Generic_Detractor2021 said:


> Im sleeping in the reehouse tonight with the night light on. You can stay there too. Just dont try playing with yourself through your sweat pants, and then uploading it to YT via a mobile upload code. That is frowned upon



You might want to bring your own blanket again. Mines in the wash for the 3rd time this week and its currently drying.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Apr 1, 2021)

Operation I Don't Need This I Have a Wife went off without a hitch. Due to the large amount of anime waifus on the site right now Phil won't be able to read the Farms today. This will allow us to mask our movements for our other ops.


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 1, 2021)

Generic_Detractor2021 said:


> I wish I could rate winner and horrifying at the same time.
> 
> Go back to Wisconsin, all you little punk bitches!
> 
> ...


Well the rules are if you found boobs you have to show all of us. Remember that you also got to top up the snack or soda supply as well; you have to give to receive fren.


----------



## Third_World_Detractor (Apr 3, 2021)

Hey guys can i join in? I have candies in my van if you guys want...


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Apr 4, 2021)

Third_World_Detractor said:


> Hey guys can i join in? I have candies in my van if you guys want...
> 
> View attachment 2056484


Jolly Ranchers?


----------



## Third_World_Detractor (Apr 4, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Jolly Ranchers?


...Yes...Jolly Ranches... A lot


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 5, 2021)

Third_World_Detractor said:


> Hey guys can i join in? I have candies in my van if you guys want...
> 
> View attachment 2056484


Last time I got candy from a van I woke up in the woods. I must have sleep walked and had another happy dream.


----------



## Swirling weeb (Apr 5, 2021)

I got it squirrels thay are ninjas and have red meat kababs that will flare up philliams gout


----------



## naught (Apr 10, 2021)

I'm going to kick Phil in the shins, 


Third_World_Detractor said:


> Hey guys can i join in? I have candies in my van if you guys want...
> 
> View attachment 2056484


Hai, are you a YouTuber?


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 15, 2021)

naught said:


> I'm going to kick Phil in the shins,
> 
> Hai, are you a YouTuber?


You can't do that Phil already said he'd slap the shit out of one of us when one of our top secret detractor agents met him in VRchat.


----------



## naught (Apr 15, 2021)

tripmix said:


> You can't do that Phil already said he'd slap the shit out of one of us when one of our top secret detractor agents met him in VRchat.


I don't want anyone to get hurt.
Ok, ok what about this I put a woopie cushion under Phil's seat?


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 15, 2021)

naught said:


> I don't want anyone to get hurt.
> Ok, ok what about this I put a woopie cushion under Phil's seat?


Ok, remember to your wear your mask. Not for coof but for the stench from Phil's chair.


----------



## The Crust (Apr 15, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Ok, remember to your wear your mask. Not for coof but for the stench from Phil's chair.


I genuinely wonder what DPS's chair smells like. If it has that onion effect where the vapors from it irritate your eyes and exposed flesh. What sort of hazmat gear do I need to approach him?


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 15, 2021)

The Crust said:


> I genuinely wonder what DPS's chair smells like. If it has that onion effect where the vapors from it irritate your eyes and exposed flesh. What sort of hazmat gear do I need to approach him?


I bet it smells like broccoli. I hate broccoli.

I think I still got my astronaut costume from the time I was playing spaceman in the reehouse made with paper mache and stuff I found you can borrow that.


----------



## PutridElephant (Apr 16, 2021)

someone sneak some Febreze into his awfice.


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 19, 2021)

ok fellers which one of you has been talking to the feds?


----------



## Opollo (Apr 19, 2021)

The reehouse has to be the most retarded thing on the internet in the last 12 months.

Edit: In the last 10 years.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Apr 19, 2021)

Opollo said:


> The reehouse has to be the most retarded thing on the internet in the last 12 months.
> 
> Edit: In the last 10 years.


PULL THE ROPE LADDER UP


----------



## SauceRyuKen (Apr 21, 2021)

On the surface, it's just an okay shitposting channel and some of the stories are funny. Just another piece of evidence pointing to Phil being an unbearable fucking bore without a buffer and making your own fun.

But if you look a little deeper, this is unironically brilliant satire. How the Reehouse crew acts in jest is EXACTLY how Dsp's inner circle mods and tumbleweed forum spergs act without a hint of irony or self awareness. The dudes are legit acting out a shitty, autistic direct to video spy thriller and are super into it. The cult of the oppulent pig ACTUALLY RUNS OPS.

Meanwhile, over at Kiwi HQ, a bunch of loveable rogues passionately discuss Agent Joi's crusty blanket, who's banned from the PC, and who has to bring the next batch of doritos and Brazy booba pics. It's just a picture worth a thousand words to the human qualities of both sides of this "conflict". While the cult gears for an internet crusade, ready to take back Kekusalem and shower a scammer with money to own the trolls, the trolls make shoops of Jasper jumping at Phil's lumpy head and laugh about it.

It really makes you think where did these pitiable deluded fools get the notion that anyone is punching the air over them bleeding their bank account dry for the sake of someone who never has and never will give a sugarfried fuck about them.


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 21, 2021)

SauceRyuKen said:


> On the surface, it's just an okay shitposting channel and some of the stories are funny. Just another piece of evidence pointing to Phil being an unbearable fucking bore without a buffer and making your own fun.
> 
> But if you look a little deeper, this is unironically brilliant satire. How the Reehouse crew acts in jest is EXACTLY how Dsp's inner circle mods and tumbleweed forum spergs act without a hint of irony or self awareness. The dudes are legit acting out a shitty, autistic direct to video spy thriller and are super into it. The cult of the oppulent pig ACTUALLY RUNS OPS.
> 
> ...


I'm not banned they just revoked my partnership.

And my blankets not been crusty for a whole 4 days now tyvm.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Apr 21, 2021)

Operation Snow will begin now, Jenna will get a hottub and designer bikinis, plus instant Twitch super partnership where she gets an extra 10 percent from bits.


----------



## Forbidden Math (Apr 25, 2021)

Sorry it's been so long since my last update. Was deep undercover getting a career at twitch so I could convince members of the illustrious board and Jeff Bezos himself that DSP was too much of a liability due to all the totally fake troll reports which I've also been ramping up. Sadly the operation was exposed today by DSP with his supreme deductive reasoning. I'm stepping down from my position and Jeff is committing seppuku live on Amazon Prime Video exclusive stream. Soon DSP will have back his partnership, and there is nothing I can do. I have failed you.

This will be my last message. Tell Jasper I always loved him. Farewell.


----------



## naught (Apr 26, 2021)

Opollo said:


> The reehouse has to be the most retarded thing on the internet in the last 12 months.
> 
> Edit: In the last 10 years.


Adults aren't allowed in.

Also I'm currently on my way to Phil's I've gotta take the food away from Phil's cat so the cat messes with him when he plays.


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 27, 2021)

TheKatIsNowGone said:


> Sorry it's been so long since my last update. Was deep undercover getting a career at twitch so I could convince members of the illustrious board and Jeff Bezos himself that DSP was too much of a liability due to all the totally fake troll reports which I've also been ramping up. Sadly the operation was exposed today by DSP with his supreme deductive reasoning. I'm stepping down from my position and Jeff is committing seppuku live on Amazon Prime Video exclusive stream. Soon DSP will have back his partnership, and there is nothing I can do. I have failed you.
> 
> This will be my last message. Tell Jasper I always loved him. Farewell.


lol your funny get back in here I'll tell sparkletor to put the rope ladder back down

I think your snack supply is still there but you been gone so long you might want to check the expiry on it.



naught said:


> Adults aren't allowed in.
> 
> Also I'm currently on my way to Phil's I've gotta take the food away from Phil's cat so the cat messes with him when he plays.


You should put cat treats in phils pockets lol

Also hurry back I need someone to play garfield kart furious racing with me.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Apr 27, 2021)

Well, the jig is up. I might as well confess...

I caused the YouTube Adpocolypse


----------



## Prince Lotor (Apr 27, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Well, the jig is up. I might as well confess...
> 
> I caused the YouTube Adpocolypse


  You were the one who was putting Coca-Cola ads on rap videos that said the gamer-word 'Nigger' in the title?

 , that tricked KarensydePhil into giving Machinima a permission slip to cancel his YouTube money. That was an epic mission.

I'm gonna go steal one of my brother's baseball trophies and put it in the Reehouse with your name on it


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Apr 27, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> You were the one who was putting Coca-Cola ads on rap videos that said the gamer-word 'Nigger' in the title?
> 
> , that tricked KarensydePhil into giving Machinima a permission slip to cancel his YouTube money. That was an epic mission.
> 
> I'm gonna go steal one of my brother's baseball tropies and put it in the Reehouse with your name on it


I also had car companies pay for ads on all the Channel Awesome videos. Because kids watching grown men play with ninja turtles or talk about comic books really are their target demographic.


----------



## gaarashatan (Apr 27, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Well, the jig is up. I might as well confess...
> 
> I caused the YouTube Adpocolypse


well since people are confessing.
i broke into phils house and took all his credit cards and maxed them out on nasal spray


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Apr 28, 2021)

I am about to reveal my greatest Reehouse gay op... this timeline we're living in? It isn't the original timeline for this reality. In the original timeline, Phil was the Roman Emperor and 21st century Rome experienced one of the greatest golden ages in its history thanks to Phillipos Burnellius Augustus' great and wise rule.
I am however such a sick-in-the-head a-logging mentally ill motherfucker that I invented a time machine just so I could be GOING BACK IN TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME. I altered history in such a way that in the current timeline Phil became an American Italian-Polish mutt who begs for money while playing video games poorly. Do you guys know remember reading about a guy named Geiseric? That's me when I went back in time. I figured out that I had to sack Rome and then establish a kingdom in North Africa in order to cause Phil to become who he is today.


----------



## gh0stzero (Apr 30, 2021)

Ok so for the garfield kart tournament i'm hosting i got the prizes:
1st place = 1 can of soda, bag of doritos, and some toffee popcorn (not the whole bag though I need that for movie night)
2nd place 1 can of soda bag of doritos
3rd place just the one can of soda

4th place you get to tell people you're the best player of your race and nationality


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 1, 2021)

Sorry, we're not playing Garfield Kart. It has been switched to Board Game Top Shop.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 2, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Sorry, we're not playing Garfield Kart. It has been switched to Board Game Top Shop.
> View attachment 2135112


Hey sparkletor where is the playstation 1? You still havent told me! Want me to run the tournament for you?


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 5, 2021)

Guys I downloaded some cool and fun mods for our Dead or Alive tournament this weekend. Don't let your moms know!


----------



## SauceRyuKen (May 5, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Guys I downloaded some cool and fun mods for our Dead or Alive tournament this weekend. Don't let your moms know!


Cunning of you to pick the one decent fighting game on PSX with a Hulk Hogan expy... Who actively uses his ass (Ah-yuss) in combat... I'm sure some of the attendants will be stoked as they try to take 4th place. Maybe some celebrity guest will show up!





There's not even that many clothes to take off for the modders.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 6, 2021)

SauceRyuKen said:


> I'm sure some of the attendants will be stoked as they try to take 4th place. Maybe some celebrity guest will show up!


Phil is a Mature Adult™ and grown-ups aren't allowed in the Reehouse.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 10, 2021)

CODE RED ​
Whoever has not returned my dad's Penthouse and Playboy issues please do so now. I've read a book about Roman legions and found out that if a legionnaire stole from the legion his punishment consisted of him being put in a sack full of snakes and then being thrown in the nearest river. Don't make me do the same to you. If we don't return my dad's nudie mags he won't let me use his credit card to buy salty snacks and sugary sodas for the Reehouse parties. You have been warned!


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (May 10, 2021)

I've almost got Hulk Hogan's Spicy hot bonerslap adventures done for Android, the Windows phone certification is still pending. I'll send out the beta keys to all of Phil's mods soon.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 11, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> CODE RED ​
> Whoever has not returned my dad's Penthouse and Playboy issues please do so now. I've read a book about Roman legions and found out that if a legionnaire stole from the legion his punishment consisted of him being put in a sack full of snakes and then being thrown in the nearest river. Don't make me do the same to you. If we don't return my dad's nudie mags he won't let me use his credit card to buy salty snacks and sugary sodas for the Reehouse parties. You have been warned!


Umm, hypothetically, what if one of the magazines got ruined? I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich while reading the articles, and mayo got all over it. Nothing I could do.

I also accidentally cut some pages out.

Sorry.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 11, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Umm, hypothetically, what if one of the magazines got ruined? I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich while reading the articles, and mayo got all over it. Nothing I could do.
> 
> I also accidentally cut some pages out.
> 
> Sorry.


If that hypothetically happened the hypothetical offender would have to hypothetically buy a new hypothetical copy to hypothetically replace the hypothetically ruined magazine. I've already hypothetically found a sack in my hypothetical basement and caught a bunch of hypothetical snakes while hypothetically walking around the hypothetical backwoods near my hypothetical house. It would really be a shame if I had to hypothetically stuff someone into a hypothetical bag of snakes and then throw them into a hypothetical river if they don't find a hypothetical replacement for the hypothetical ruined issue of the hypothetical magazine.

But we're just speaking in hypotheticals.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 11, 2021)

Well don't look at me fellers I just use the PC to look at boobs.

Also could some of those magazines be used as prizes for the next garfield kart tournament?


----------



## actually (May 11, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Well don't look at me fellers I just use the PC to look at boobs.
> 
> Also could some of those magazines be used as prizes for the next garfield kart tournament?


Seems fair, but I think we should ban Nermal from the races. That little fucker is OP.


----------



## Schmeckel (May 11, 2021)

actually said:


> Seems fair, but I think we should ban Nermal from the races. That little fucker is OP.


As long as nobody puts in the code to bring back Lyman, this is a good suggestion.


----------



## Wurstbrot (May 11, 2021)

Operation Divorce was a success. Agent Tevin never mentioned a divorce, therefore he mentioned a divorce. Now Khet can't help herself and end this marriage. Good job everyone.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 11, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Also could some of those magazines be used as prizes for the next garfield kart tournament?






Your browser is not able to display this video.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 11, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> View attachment 2161622


Even if I trade you like half a tub of pringles for one? I'll let you play as garfield.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 11, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Even if I trade you like half a tub of pringles for one? I'll let you play as garfield.






You better stop with this nahnsense or you're getting lean-in manually pushed into this hypothetical bag full of hypothetical snakes.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 11, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> View attachment 2161737
> You better stop with this nahnsense or you're getting lean-in manually pushed into this hypothetical bag full of hypothetical snakes.


Ok I'll help you find your magazines. Just let me grab my pirates outfit and we can play pirates on a big adventure to find some booty.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 12, 2021)

You sick fuck. I had to spend all my allowance to get my cousin to buy a stupid copy of the February 2011 Penthouse so you won't stuff me into a bag of snakes. 

And second, THERE IS NO GARFIELD CART! WE ARE PLAYING BOARD GAME TOP SHOP FOR PSX!


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 12, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> You sick fuck. I had to spend all my allowance to get my cousin to buy a stupid copy of the February 2011 Penthouse so you won't stuff me into a bag of snakes.
> 
> And second, THERE IS NO GARFIELD CART! WE ARE PLAYING BOARD GAME TOP SHOP FOR PSX!


Thanks, my dad returned his credit card to me as soon as I gave him that issue back so I bought a bunch of salty snacks and sugary sodas for you guys! Do you want me to buy something special for the tournament this weekend?


----------



## gh0stzero (May 12, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> You sick fuck. I had to spend all my allowance to get my cousin to buy a stupid copy of the February 2011 Penthouse so you won't stuff me into a bag of snakes.
> 
> And second, THERE IS NO GARFIELD CART! WE ARE PLAYING BOARD GAME TOP SHOP FOR PSX!


Ok we can play board game top shop but after that we got to play garfield kart its the furious racing one its got multiplayer and everything.



Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Thanks, my dad returned his credit card to me as soon as I gave him that issue back so I bought a bunch of salty snacks and sugary sodas for you guys! Do you want me to buy something special for the tournament this weekend?


Can I get some pretzels? I'll trade you a can of cream soda for it.


----------



## Schmeckel (May 12, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Ok we can play board game top shop but after that we got to play garfield kart its the furious racing one its got multiplayer and everything.
> 
> 
> Can I get some pretzels? I'll trade you a can of cream soda for it.


What brand of cream soda?  I got a boat-load of pretzels that my soul-mom bought me that I'm willing to part with, if the brand is right...


----------



## gh0stzero (May 13, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> What brand of cream soda?  I got a boat-load of pretzels that my soul-mom bought me that I'm willing to part with, if the brand is right...


barr its this stuff


its pretty good.


----------



## gaarashatan (May 13, 2021)

powerlvl

ive never had cream soda


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 13, 2021)

I couldn't get cream soda, my mom bought Vernor's


----------



## gaarashatan (May 13, 2021)

my dad worked at rc cola, so thats what i had :l


----------



## Schmeckel (May 13, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I couldn't get cream soda, my mom bought Vernor's
> View attachment 2166606


Sorry, guys.  He gets my pretzels.  Ginger ale is where it's at.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 14, 2021)

One of our gang is partially deathly allergic to peanuts so pretzels are not allowed. They put peanuts in pretzels, right?


----------



## actually (May 14, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> One of our gang is partially deathly allergic to peanuts so pretzels are not allowed. They put peanuts in pretzels, right?


I'll put my nuts in the pretzels.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 14, 2021)

actually said:


> I'll put my nuts in the pretzels.


Nobody eat the pretzels.


----------



## gaarashatan (May 14, 2021)

This peanut butter tastes funny yall


----------



## Prince Lotor (May 14, 2021)

I can't help but notice that most of the soda is still left and all my Twizzler Straws are gone. Is someone just eating the Twizzler Straws?

My dad says he's only going to buy me black licorice if we keep going through Twizzler Straws like this.

I can try to save my paper route money to just buy some regular Twizzlers, but I don't get paid until next month.  

Please stop eating all the Twizzler Straws. Those are for drinks only.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 15, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> I can't help but notice that most of the soda is still left and all my Twizzler Straws are gone. Is someone just eating the Twizzler Straws?


Oh....those were straws the whole time huh? 

Come to think of it I did think they were a weird kind of salt water taffy tubes.


----------



## Vapid_Idiot (May 16, 2021)

NEGGERS


----------



## Draventren (May 16, 2021)

GUYS MY OLDER SISTER SAYS SHE'LL RENT MORTAL KOMBAT AND FRIDAY THE 13TH FOR US FROM BLOCKBUSTER! SHE SAYS THAT MOVIE IS SO SCARY IT MADE HER FRIEND PEE HER PANTS!


----------



## Anime Waifu NFT collector (May 17, 2021)

Frens my mom says that if I do well in school she will give me a ride there and bring the canvas pool so we can have a pool party,its 2 meters by 1.40 and the water reaches up to your knees,if I get there in the morning its gonna be full by noon,what do you think?


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 18, 2021)

Anime Waifu NFT collector said:


> Frens my mom says that if I do well in school she will give me a ride there and bring the canvas pool so we can have a pool party,its 2 meters by 1.40 and the water reaches up to your knees,if I get there in the morning its gonna be full by noon,what do you think?


After what happened last summer with the neighbor, Mr. McFingers, we don't go swimming out back anymore. Sorry (unless you're into that sort of thing)


----------



## gh0stzero (May 19, 2021)

Hey fellers I'm back.

Did we all get grounded last night lol


----------



## Full Race Replay (May 19, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Hey fellers I'm back.
> 
> Did we all get grounded last night lol


My dad says we have to follow the rules or he won’t let us use the treehouse anymore


----------



## Schmeckel (May 19, 2021)

Full Race Replay said:


> My dad says we have to follow the rules or he won’t let us use the treehouse anymore


I'll just make a pillow-fort in the basement.  You're all invited if we can't use the reehouse.  Just don't bring chips that get crumbs everywhere.  Mom will ground me for like a week if we make too big a mess.


----------



## DukeMorty (May 19, 2021)

Unfortunately, our Leader got mad and cut off comms for a few hours so most of us lost contact with HQ and couldn't get new orders. Fragh Unit was waiting in the sewers for hours to get new orders. Fortunately, we had a copy of Kangaroo Jack and we were "entertained" for a bit. We did lose one solider who offed himself because he thought HQ abandoned us. But we are good now and got our new orders to find out if Kat is pregnant by acquiring her piss through the sewage system.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 19, 2021)

I'm new but was wondering if there was room in the treehouse for one more lol? My older brother gave me a SI: swimsuit issue and huge lawn darts if anyone wants to borrow them


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (May 19, 2021)

I've got a whole bunch of Trix yogurt and Caprisuns if you guys are hanging out in the blanket fort later


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 19, 2021)

If my mom bought a Fudgy the Whale cake for us would you guys let me in lol?


----------



## gaarashatan (May 19, 2021)

Quantum Diabetes said:


> I've got a whole bunch of Trix yogurt and Caprisuns if you guys are hanging out in the blanket fort later


ill bring my gamecube and boulders gate dark alliance 2


----------



## Schmeckel (May 19, 2021)

gaarashatan said:


> ill bring my gamecube and boulders gate dark alliance 2


We'll have to play rock paper scissors to see who gets Drizzt and who gets Artemis.


----------



## gaarashatan (May 19, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> We'll have to play rock paper scissors to see who gets Drizzt and who gets Artemis.


naw man im all about necromancer


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 20, 2021)

gaarashatan said:


> ill bring my gamecube and boulders gate dark alliance 2


Please bring Mario Kart: DD and like 3 more controllers if you can lol



Anime Waifu NFT collector said:


> Frens my mom says that if I do well in school she will give me a ride there and bring the canvas pool so we can have a pool party,its 2 meters by 1.40 and the water reaches up to your knees,if I get there in the morning its gonna be full by noon,what do you think?


I'm late but is there still room? BTW can you lower the water level because I'm 22 stones?


----------



## gh0stzero (May 20, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Please bring Mario Kart: DD and like 3 more controllers if you can lol


We don't play mario kart, we got garfield kart though. I'm running a competition at the moment.

The 1st prize is a bunch of playboys and penthouse magazines I found buried like 10 feet away from the reehouse.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 20, 2021)

tripmix said:


> We don't play mario kart, we got garfield kart though. I'm running a competition at the moment.
> 
> The 1st prize is a bunch of playboys and penthouse magazines I found buried like 10 feet away from the reehouse.


Any ghetto kart game is fine with me. I got dibbs on Odie cuz he is a light character and speedy. Now this reading material you folks threw in the hole without being wrapped in plastic right? lol


----------



## gh0stzero (May 20, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Any ghetto kart game is fine with me. I got dibbs on Odie cuz he is a light character and speedy. Now this reading material you folks threw in the hole without being wrapped in plastic right? lol


Some pages stick together but they're otherwise fine. Unless you want a little bit of popcorn from my movie night stash I can offer that instead.


----------



## gaarashatan (May 20, 2021)

these are your choices, also got gauntlet dark legacy on ps2 too








Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Any ghetto kart game is fine with me. I got dibbs on Odie cuz he is a light character and speedy. Now this reading material you folks threw in the hole without being wrapped in plastic right? lol


dont forget diddy kong or star wars racing on n64


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 20, 2021)

DukeMorty said:


> Unfortunately, our Leader got mad and cut off comms for a few hours so most of us lost contact with HQ and couldn't get new orders. Fragh Unit was waiting in the sewers for hours to get new orders. Fortunately, we had a copy of Kangaroo Jack and we were "entertained" for a bit. We did lose one solider who offed himself because he thought HQ abandoned us. But we are good now and got our new orders to find out if Kat is pregnant by acquiring her piss through the sewage system.


I DID NOTHING WRONG


Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> I'm new but was wondering if there was room in the treehouse for one more lol? My older brother gave me a SI: swimsuit issue and huge lawn darts if anyone wants to borrow them


Send Tripmix some dick pics and you're in


tripmix said:


> We don't play mario kart, we got garfield kart though. I'm running a competition at the moment.
> 
> The 1st prize is a bunch of playboys and penthouse magazines I found buried like 10 feet away from the reehouse.


NO GARFIELD KART! ONLY BOARD GAME TOP SHOP! I'M SICK OF THIS SHIT! I'M SERIOUS!

Next person who posts Garfield Kart has to read "Happy Appy" creepypasta out loud or they're banned.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 20, 2021)

Thanks @Sparkletor lol. I enjoy your sarcastic Dave-like posts when you get goofy. If I could send you some pounds I would but the usps said it would cost 200 american to ship lol. I'll take your advice to Dave and shave so my chode looks better....also its going to be a Brett Farve type photo with me wearing crocs. Edit: downward angle photo lol. @tripmix "YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHERE TO SEND THE PHOTO" lol in my best Dave voice


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 20, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Thanks @Sparkletor lol. I enjoy your sarcastic Dave-like posts when you get goofy. If I could send you some pounds I would but the usps said it would cost 200 american to ship lol. I'll take your advice to Dave and shave so my chode looks better....also its going to be a Brett Farve type photo with me wearing crocs. Edit: downward angle photo lol. @tripmix "YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHERE TO SEND THE PHOTO" lol in my best Dave voice


Sorry, have 5.5 hours to go in Happy Appy"


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 20, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Thanks @Sparkletor lol. I enjoy your sarcastic Dave-like posts when you get goofy. If I could send you some pounds I would but the usps said it would cost 200 american to ship lol. I'll take your advice to Dave and shave so my chode looks better....also its going to be a Brett Farve type photo with me wearing crocs. Edit: downward angle photo lol. @tripmix "YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHERE TO SEND THE PHOTO" lol in my best Dave voice


Also make sure to take a photo of yourself doing double romans while naked, that way you'll get my support.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 20, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I DID NOTHING WRONG
> 
> Send Tripmix some dick pics and you're in
> 
> ...


Ew what am I gonna do with dick pix? Send feet pix instead.

Well fellers I dont wanna get banned but I put a lot of work into this competition.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 20, 2021)

3 hours of "Happy Appy" and I need to tap out. This is the worst shit ever. Seriously. Makes Phil look like gold.


----------



## Prince Lotor (May 20, 2021)

Guys, I can't hangout in the Reehouse anymore. My mom says I'm a bad influence and that she told your parents I'm not allowed over.

I'm so sick of her shit. If anyone needs me I'm going to ride my bike into the city and smoke cigarettes until she stops acting crazy.

I think I can still drop off the Twizzler Straws and candy cigarettes you guys like, but I'll have to sneak in at night so no one sees me.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 21, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> Guys, I can't hangout in the Reehouse anymore. My mom says I'm a bad influence and that she told your parents I'm not allowed over.
> 
> I'm so sick of her shit. If anyone needs me I'm going to ride my bike into the city and smoke cigarettes until she stops acting crazy.
> 
> I think I can still drop off the Twizzler Straws and candy cigarettes you guys like, but I'll have to sneak in at night so no one sees me.


You can just sneak out and live in the Reehouse forever. My mom has wifi, you can stream Board Game Top Shop and demand $200 a stream.


----------



## gaarashatan (May 21, 2021)

Lets just build a fort in the back woodz and live there. #noparentsallowed


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 21, 2021)

gaarashatan said:


> Lets just build a fort in the back woodz and live there. #noparentsallowed


but skinwalkers


----------



## Prince Lotor (May 21, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> You can just sneak out and live in the Reehouse forever. My mom has wifi, you can stream Board Game Top Shop and demand $200 a stream.


Awesome. My mom flipped her shit when I came home smelling like smoke again, so I'm running away.

It's perfect because if my mom tells anyone I'm gone and she doesn't know where I am my dad will get custody and the child support payments will stop.

If I setup my PSOne and bring my copy of Monster Rancher 2 I should be able to hide out during the day so no grown-ups see me.

Does anyone's parents have a copy of Mariah Carey's "Merry Christmas" CD? I need it to get the Satan Clause monster.


----------



## Schmeckel (May 21, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> Awesome. My mom flipped her shit when I came home smelling like smoke again, so I'm running away.
> 
> It's perfect because if my mom tells anyone I'm gone and she doesn't know where I am my dad will get custody and the child support payments will stop.
> 
> ...


I tried that CD.  All it gave me was a stupid Suezo.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 21, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> Awesome. My mom flipped her shit when I came home smelling like smoke again, so I'm running away.
> 
> It's perfect because if my mom tells anyone I'm gone and she doesn't know where I am my dad will get custody and the child support payments will stop.
> 
> ...


I already have my Playstation plugged in and we only play Board Game Top Shop.

It's the Dark Souls of Board Game Top Shops.


----------



## Prince Lotor (May 21, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> I tried that CD.  All it gave me was a stupid Suezo.


Damn, it's probably scratched 


Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I already have my Playstation plugged in and we only play Board Game Top Shop.
> 
> It's the Dark Souls of Board Game Top Shops.


What if I only use the moster I get off the Board Game Top Shop disk while I'm in the Reehouse?


----------



## Schmeckel (May 21, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> Damn, it's probably scratched
> 
> What if I only use the moster I get off the Board Game Top Shop disk while I'm in the Reehouse?


If that disc gives a Durahan or Phoenix, I'm gonna bring over my memory card to take advantage of it.  I'm tired of all the Pixies and Golems I keep getting from Mom's "Now that's what I call music" CD collection.


----------



## Prince Lotor (May 21, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> If that disc gives a Durahan or Phoenix, I'm gonna bring over my memory card to take advantage of it.  I'm tired of all the Pixies and Golems I keep getting from Mom's "Now that's what I call music" CD collection.


If it gives a Pixie or an Undine I might need some alone time under the blanket to. . .plan out how to train it. . .

I have the soundtrack to Disney's "Mulan" I can bring. That has a Kokushi Muso on it which is Durahan/??? so you can take it home on your memory card. I also have the soundtrack to Disney's "The Little Mermaid" so you can get a Mermaid (Undine/???) if you want.

I've never found a CD that gives a Phoenix though, unless you have "Bust a Move 4" to get the special one. You just have to go on the Kawrea Expedition to get another Fire Feather if you want one.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 22, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 i have to ask, with your love of BGTS, where you abused 20 years ago with it...like clockwork orange style? Also, who split soda all over my fun-dip naptime pillow? its a solid block now and lost all comfort.


----------



## Schmeckel (May 22, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> If it gives a Pixie or an Undine I might need some alone time under the blanket to. . .plan out how to train it. . .
> 
> I have the soundtrack to Disney's "Mulan" I can bring. That has a Kokushi Muso on it which is Durahan/??? so you can take it home on your memory card. I also have the soundtrack to Disney's "The Little Mermaid" so you can get a Mermaid (Undine/???) if you want.
> 
> I've never found a CD that gives a Phoenix though, unless you have "Bust a Move 4" to get the special one. You just have to go on the Kawrea Expedition to get another Fire Feather if you want one.


You could just use any of the Gabriel Knight discs to get a Phoenix, but none of my friends ever had that game... They were all too busy playing doom and heroes of might and magic... 



Spoiler



Seriously, we had a massive CD collection, and I tried every single one trying to get a cool monster. Everything came out absolutely shit. Either ma and pa had shit music taste, or the RNG'sus was just not on my side. I miss monster rancher.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 22, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Sparkletor 2.0 i have to ask, with your love of BGTS, where you abused 20 years ago with it...like clockwork orange style? Also, who split soda all over my fun-dip naptime pillow? its a solid block now and lost all comfort.


To be honest, back in the day the stores in town had stacks and stacks of BGTS for $1. When my friends and I would go to the store we would joke about buying it because it looked absolutely horrible. One day I bought one and brought it to the house. It was so bizarre. Instead of dice, you roll a pencil. Burger shop that doesn't sell hamburgers. The 'boss' of the game is a robot named Santa and also another character named Santa who is a lady. Poor English translation.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 22, 2021)

Whoever deleted my save file in Ninja Gaiden Black please step forward, I promise I won't punish you too badly.


----------



## Schmeckel (May 22, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Whoever deleted my save file in Ninja Gaiden Black please step forward, I promise I won't punish you too badly.


Sorry, PBE. I saw "black" and started chewing my fingers. I might have maybe sort of kinda deleted it accidentally maliciously.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 22, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> Sorry, PBE. I saw "black" and started chewing my fingers. I might have maybe sort of kinda deleted it accidentally maliciously.


Understandable, but I still have to punish you. Next time I buy snacks with my dad's credit cards I'll make sure to buy shrimp flavored potato chips because I know you hate those. Nothing personal, just business.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 22, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> To be honest, back in the day the stores in town had stacks and stacks of BGTS for $1. When my friends and I would go to the store we would joke about buying it because it looked absolutely horrible. One day I bought one and brought it to the house. It was so bizarre. Instead of dice, you roll a pencil. Burger shop that doesn't sell hamburgers. The 'boss' of the game is a robot named Santa and also another character named Santa who is a lady. Poor English translation.


Does this mean I can do the garfield kart competition in the reehouse?


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 22, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> To be honest, back in the day the stores in town had stacks and stacks of BGTS for $1. When my friends and I would go to the store we would joke about buying it because it looked absolutely horrible. One day I bought one and brought it to the house. It was so bizarre. Instead of dice, you roll a pencil. Burger shop that doesn't sell hamburgers. The 'boss' of the game is a robot named Santa and also another character named Santa who is a lady. Poor English translation.


My mom dragged me to office depot or staples types of stores around the PS1 times and they had decent pc games but weird 5th party titles for PS1 games. You'd ask yourself how you could go wrong with a 5 dollar tag on it lol. I had super baseball 2020 on the SNES and would always laugh at the names the players were given. If you play it, The best team has Johnny Applepie on it. I know your pain lol.



Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Understandable, but I still have to punish you. Next time I buy snacks with my dad's credit cards I'll make sure to buy shrimp flavored potato chips because I know you hate those. Nothing personal, just business.


Um Pretty Boy Extremism, like, um, like let me tell you about this lying sh--head on the the internet named Schmekel, um, like,  okay???? He bought a pirated copy of BMX XXX at the flea market and the memory corrupted. It was no accident he wanted to see them boobies though.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (May 24, 2021)

Operation Dead Bird is doing as good as always! Phil bitched about low likes and retweets despite being a white hot popular internet personality with thousands of twitter impressions. Keep up the great work by bullying everyone who replies to and likes his tweets.

Magister Equitum, over and out.


----------



## Schmeckel (May 24, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Operation Dead Bird is doing as good as always! Phil bitched about low likes and retweets despite being a white hot popular internet personality with thousands of twitter impressions. Keep up the great work by bullying everyone who replies to and likes his tweets.
> 
> Magister Equitum, over and out.


It wasn't bullying. I used dad's credit card to buy everyone a bunch of Swedish fish. And they were too busy chewing to respond/retwat/whatever to Dave's gin musings. 

I deserve the credit. Me! Ree!


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 25, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Operation Dead Bird is doing as good as always! Phil bitched about low likes and retweets despite being a white hot popular internet personality with thousands of twitter impressions. Keep up the great work by bullying everyone who replies to and likes his tweets.
> 
> Magister Equitum, over and out.


I just made sure derich's twitter was routed to every DSP fan. There's so much cooming to do, they won't have time or strength to engage. @cumdumpster69 I liked how you took it in the ass. When I saw his tweets I couldn't believe it lol.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 26, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Operation Dead Bird is doing as good as always! Phil bitched about low likes and retweets despite being a white hot popular internet personality with thousands of twitter impressions. Keep up the great work by bullying everyone who replies to and likes his tweets.
> 
> Magister Equitum, over and out.


But I can't, Phil always tweets really late for me and i got to be home when the street lights come on, I'll bring some saurkraut to make up for my poor performance on that op


Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> I just made sure derich's twitter was routed to every DSP fan. There's so much cooming to do, they won't have time or strength to engage. @cumdumpster69 I liked how you took it in the ass. When I saw his tweets I couldn't believe it lol.


Ikr? imagine using twitter for porn and not ask jeeves like a normal person


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 27, 2021)

tripmix said:


> But I can't, Phil always tweets really late for me and i got to be home when the street lights come on, I'll bring some saurkraut to make up for my poor performance on that op
> 
> Ikr? imagine using twitter for porn and not ask jeeves like a normal person


After ask jeeves I put the images on floppy disk. I can get like 4 pictures on that floppy!


----------



## Schmeckel (May 27, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> After ask jeeves I put the images on floppy disk. I can get like 4 pictures on that floppy!


Look at these guys using Ask Jeeves. Excite is where it's at.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 27, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> Look at these guys using Ask Jeeves. Excite is where it's at.


I don't know if AOL allows access to that site.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 27, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> Look at these guys using Ask Jeeves. Excite is where it's at.


i only use ask jeeves cuz you fellers put google to strict safesearch after I found anime hentai "jerk off instructions" online when I tried googling anime Joi that one time which is kinda dumb. I mean who needs instructions on how to jerk off lol xD


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 27, 2021)

tripmix said:


> i only use ask jeeves cuz you fellers put google to strict safesearch after I found anime hentai "jerk off instructions" online when I tried googling anime Joi that one time which is kinda dumb. I mean who needs instructions on how to jerk off lol xD


Was a tentacle listed in the instructions?


----------



## gh0stzero (May 27, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Was a tentacle listed in the instructions?


Oh yeah loads of them like 9 or 8 or something I can't remember. 

Also whoever was wanting to play samurai this weekend the really confused amazon guy showed up at the reeeehouse and delivered your 50 foot length of rope. He was cool and promised not to tell the grownups about the super secret reehouse though.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 29, 2021)

Did the queen take away sparkletor's internet license? The treehouse has been seriously lacking the daily forced Top Shop game play that I've become accustomed to. Now I kinda wanna play Garfield Kart after I raid the wine coolers and booze from my mom's fridge. Anyone know if O'Douls is any good?

Edit: my other guess is sparkletor's parents took them on holiday to King's Island. I hear they are a safe park.


----------



## gh0stzero (May 30, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Did the queen take away sparkletor's internet license? The treehouse has been seriously lacking the daily forced Top Shop game play that I've become accustomed to. Now I kinda wanna play Garfield Kart after I raid the wine coolers and booze from my mom's fridge. Anyone know if O'Douls is any good?
> 
> Edit: my other guess is sparkletor's parents took them on holiday to King's Island. I hear they are a safe park.


I heard he got grounded for running around in his pedal kart shouting "money money money" so he's probably grounded playing board game top shop in his room.

We can't continue the garfield kart competition without him though, if you want to play it yourself its on sale on steam right now the furious racing one is the multiplayer one you need for playing with frens online.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 30, 2021)

tripmix said:


> I heard he got grounded for running around in his pedal kart shouting "money money money" so he's probably grounded playing board game top shop in his room.
> 
> We can't continue the garfield kart competition without him though, if you want to play it yourself its on sale on steam right now the furious racing one is the multiplayer one you need for playing with frens online.


This shows us you never go full reta...I mean Dave. Hope Sparky learns a lesson but will say I'm jealous of the pedal cart....those kick ass!


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (May 30, 2021)

I was busy playing Raid: Shadow Legends


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (May 30, 2021)

Nahuhuhuh. If I get one of those round snow sleds and rope, could you pull me with your pedal cart? I won't tell anyone if I get hurt. Tripmix brought that up and now I want one again. I grew up when power wheels were kinda new and crazy expense so I got a pedal cart. Do you have a side emergency brake lever for 360 acton?


----------



## gh0stzero (Jun 2, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Nahuhuhuh. If I get one of those round snow sleds and rope, could you pull me with your pedal cart? I won't tell anyone if I get hurt. Tripmix brought that up and now I want one again. I grew up when power wheels were kinda new and crazy expense so I got a pedal cart. Do you have a side emergency brake lever for 360 acton?


That sounds fun but I don't think pedaling a cart in the snow would be great for the rider. Maybe with offroad tyres and little spikes in them it would be ok but until snow comes you fellers can play garfield kart right?



Spoiler



I also had a pedal cart and would go as fast as I could in it to do handbrake turns, its a miracle I didn't seriously hurt myself or another person doing it.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 2, 2021)

tripmix said:


> That sounds fun but I don't think pedaling a cart in the snow would be great for the rider. Maybe with offroad tyres and little spikes in them it would be ok but until snow comes you fellers can play garfield kart right?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


With your spoiler, I totally agree with you lol. I was thinking straight pavement but either way would need Sparkles to call out traffic since I'm used to looking left to right....I feel like either way I'd get injured. garfield kart sounds fun but feel like Top shop will when out as always. Think I want to see if sparkletor can find Beverly Hills Cop for the PS2 because it didn't come state side...I kinda see why.


----------



## Schmeckel (Jun 2, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> With your spoiler, I totally agree with you lol. I was thinking straight pavement but either way would need Sparkles to call out traffic since I'm used to looking left to right....I feel like either way I'd get injured. garfield kart sounds fun but feel like Top shop will when out as always. Think I want to see if sparkletor can find Beverly Hills Cop for the PS2 because it didn't come state side...I kinda see why.


Does that game have a secret "banana in the tailpipe" mode?


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 2, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> Does that game have a secret "banana in the tailpipe" mode?


lol. Well, kind of...its a mission. You get Herpes Simplex 10 soon after too. To be total and cahmpletely hahnest it is Beverly hills cop in name only. I watched someone play a bit and think the company had an untitled game then payed for the license.


----------



## gaarashatan (Jun 3, 2021)

I aint got legos but i got lincoln logs


----------



## Schmeckel (Jun 3, 2021)

gaarashatan said:


> I aint got legos but i got lincoln logs


My mom went to Goodwill and came back with a box of k'nex. But, I don't thing they're all from the same set. And one of the pieces was actually a spirograph thing.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Jun 3, 2021)

gaarashatan said:


> I aint got legos but i got lincoln logs


I got a LiteBrite and two cases of Ecto cooler, I ate all the Nintendo cereal system


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 3, 2021)

Quantum Diabetes said:


> I got a LiteBrite and two cases of Ecto cooler, I ate all the Nintendo cereal system


Hope its not ecto cooler from 1990....wouldn't want to drink that only because its a collectors item dood!


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 3, 2021)

What game are we gonna play this weekend as a tournament?


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 3, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> What game are we gonna play this weekend as a tournament?


Tripmix is going to say garfield kart , which BTW I got dibbs on Odie(he's a beast!) but Sparkles is going to make us play Top Shop or steal from our savings/party change jar hidden in a very discreet place to fund his new Raid: Shadow legends habit. 200 more brit bucks and he can move up 1/4 a rank and purchase magic missles. Sparkletor joked about the game earlier but if you bring it up he rates you dumb/mad at the internet and locks you out of the treehouse next time you leave. Plus yells out the window that you are a morahn.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jun 3, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Tripmix is going to say garfield kart , which BTW I got dibbs on Odie(he's a beast!) but Sparkles is going to make us play Top Shop or steal from our savings/party change jar hidden in a very discreet place to fund his new Raid: Shadow legends habit. 200 more brit bucks and he can move up 1/4 a rank and purchase magic missles. Sparkletor joked about the game earlier but if you bring it up he rates you dumb/mad at the internet and locks you out of the treehouse next time you leave. Plus yells out the window that you are a morahn.


Well actually virtua fighter is free right now on PS+ lets do that.


then its back to garfield kart


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 5, 2021)

First of all, it's Board Game Top Shop.

Second, it's the best game in the world.

Gafleld Kort is garbage.





Make fun of my Raid: Shadow Legends. I'm #1


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 6, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> First of all, it's Board Game Top Shop.
> 
> Second, it's the best game in the world.
> 
> ...


You went full DSP into the game didn't you? I'll help. So all you have to do is stuff 3k into "business expenses" and it should work its self off in a few years. Make sure you are buying apple store cards with credit cards too.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 6, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> You went full DSP into the game didn't you? I'll help. So all you have to do is stuff 3k into "business expenses" and it should work its self off in a few years. Make sure you are buying apple store cards with credit cards too.


There is no proof that I play Raid: Shadow Legends or Top Shop. Just because I have a Top Shop avatar and post pics of me playing Raid: Shadow Legends doesn't prove anything. You're a conspiracy theorist and cult member.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 6, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> There is no proof that I play Raid: Shadow Legends or Top Shop. Just because I have a Top Shop avatar and post pics of me playing Raid: Shadow Legends doesn't prove anything. You're a conspiracy theorist and cult member.


With Top Shop I do remember you threatening to "cut" tripmix if anything garfield related found itself in the treehouse. With Raid you've only posted one picture but bet there's more. Also, you claimed you were "#1". You are as transparent as Dave. You just have to correct 3 out of 4 of his lies to get the truth.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jun 6, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> With Top Shop I do remember you threatening to "cut" tripmix if anything garfield related found itself in the treehouse. With Raid you've only posted one picture but bet there's more. Also, you claimed you were "#1". You are as transparent as Dave. You just have to correct 3 out of 4 of his lies to get the truth


Uhh can someone hide my garfield sleeping bag? Its red and orange, I was using it inside out so sparkletor wouldn't see that its garfield. They never had any blade runner, or taylor swift sleeping bags my size so I had to go with garfield.

I don't want to get cut from the reehouse crew I like you guys


----------



## Prince Lotor (Jun 6, 2021)

Real talk. Can my buddy keep his meth lab in the REEhouse for a couple days? His older brother broke parole and now the cops are going to raid his trailer. It'll just be in a drink cooler and I have an old Indian blanket we can hide it under so it just looks like something we sit on.

He says if we can't figure out where to hide it he's going to have to ditch it and won't be able to smoke crank-weed with me anymore.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 6, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> Real talk. Can my buddy keep his meth lab in the REEhouse for a couple days? His older brother broke parole and now the cops are going to raid his trailer. It'll just be in a drink cooler and I have an old Indian blanket we can hide it under so it just looks like something we sit on.
> 
> He says if we can't figure out where to hide it he's going to have to ditch it and won't be able to smoke crank-weed with me anymore.


yes


----------



## Prince Lotor (Jun 6, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> yes


I'm not gonna lie, I've only known him for like a week, but after I smoked whatever he puts in his cigarettes with him I realized he's just so fucked-up all the time that he forgot he doesn't know me and now thinks we've been buddies for years. He's alright though. I like smoking his stuff because it makes me feel like I'm in a video game.

I'll bring it over in my wagon tonight. If anyones parents see me just tell them I'm bringing root beer and ice cream for floats and that's why I need the ice cooler.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jun 7, 2021)

Hey fellers do any of you know why there is a black van and guys with SWAT written on the back of their vests hanging about the reehouse?

I was wanting to get my colouring in books but I got told that "this area is resticted stay back"

Their vests looked cool though bet they didn't cost $100 to put on.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 7, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Hey fellers do any of you know why there is a black van and guys with SWAT written on the back of their vests hanging about the reehouse?
> 
> I was wanting to get my colouring in books but I got told that "this area is resticted stay back"
> 
> Their vests looked cool though bet they didn't cost $100 to put on.


Well Sparkles has been playing a ton of Raid and it, y'know, costs a lot of money to level up. He turned the reeehouse into an indian windows 95 pro help call center to feed his habit. That might not be why SWAT is here but i'll throw it out there.


----------



## Prince Lotor (Jun 7, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Hey fellers do any of you know why there is a black van and guys with SWAT written on the back of their vests hanging about the reehouse?
> 
> I was wanting to get my colouring in books but I got told that "this area is resticted stay back"
> 
> Their vests looked cool though bet they didn't cost $100 to put on.


Uhhh, don't worry about that. I hired some Party Characters for a surprise party. They're supposed to be characters from 'SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron'. Umm. . .if they aren't wearing the cat-heads then technically they have no legal authority over you. If they hassle you too much just remember their catchphrase "I do not consent to any searches or seizures of my person or property" and they have to leave you alone, or if their costumes say 'Polícia Federal' and they are speaking Mexican for some reason just say "No moleste".

Anyway, who wants frosty chocolate milkshakes? FROSTY CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKES!


----------



## gh0stzero (Jun 8, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> Uhhh, don't worry about that. I hired some Party Characters for a surprise party. They're supposed to be characters from 'SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron'. Umm. . .if they aren't wearing the cat-heads then technically they have no legal authority over you. If they hassle you too much just remember their catchphrase "I do not consent to any searches or seizures of my person or property" and they have to leave you alone, or if their costumes say 'Polícia Federal' and they are speaking Mexican for some reason just say "No moleste".
> 
> Anyway, who wants frosty chocolate milkshakes? FROSTY CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKES!


No they were definitely cops they took your friends chemistry set and the cooler away. You owe me a doctor pepper  

They said it was getting processed into everdence or something and it could take months to process

I am learning spanish for....reasons, let me handle them.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 8, 2021)

tripmix said:


> I am learning spanish for....reasons, let me handle them.


Don't worry Ana de Armas can speak English too.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 8, 2021)

tripmix said:


> No they were definitely cops they took your friends chemistry set and the cooler away. You owe me a doctor pepper
> 
> They said it was getting processed into everdence or something and it could take months to process
> 
> I am learning spanish for....reasons, let me handle them.


No need to look for your garfield super happy fun lasagna party time sleeping bag. Sparkletor sold it on Ebay for Raid Tokens or whatever their currency is. I think an intervention needs to happen.


----------



## Schmeckel (Jun 8, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> No need to look for your garfield super happy fun lasagna party time sleeping bag. Sparkletor sold it on Ebay for Raid Tokens or whatever their currency is. I think an intervention needs to happen.


Just let Sparkletor do his thing.  If he gets more engrossed in his Raid: Shadow Legends, it just means we can break out the TG16 and take turns playing Bonk's Adventure.

But, just to make sure nothing goes accidentally missing, we should probably take our things back home when we leave the reehouse.  My mom would tell my dad that stuff was gone, and then I'd have to sit in time out.


----------



## Prince Lotor (Jun 8, 2021)

tripmix said:


> No they were definitely cops they took your friends chemistry set and the cooler away. You owe me a doctor pepper
> 
> They said it was getting processed into everdence or something and it could take months to process
> 
> I am learning spanish for....reasons, let me handle them.


Ok, so weird thing. I tried to go to my buddy's place to let him know the cops got his shit, he lives in a trailer by the train tracks, but I couldn't find his trailer. I couldn't even find the clearing where his trailer was. I was gonna let him know so that he wouldn't come by the REEhouse.
It's all good though. I snuck into the junkyard earlier to play in the abandoned cars and I ran into him there. He had another kit stashed there he remembered about, and we started it cooking and then played in the junkers until it was done. He gave me some leftover trucker pills for helping him out so if you guys want to try some let me know.

My mom's been yelling at me for sneaking out of the house all night in my ninja costume and threatened to take away my grappling hook and climbing claws. She's worried that I haven't slept in 5 days or whatever so I have to stay home tonight, but I can bring you a doctor pepper tomorrow  I could bring you some Pepperoni Pizza Combos too if you want.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 14, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> Just let Sparkletor do his thing.  If he gets more engrossed in his Raid: Shadow Legends, it just means we can break out the TG16 and take turns playing Bonk's Adventure.
> 
> But, just to make sure nothing goes accidentally missing, we should probably take our things back home when we leave the reehouse.  My mom would tell my dad that stuff was gone, and then I'd have to sit in time out.


bonk's adventure is great and very weird. I'll get some whipped cream cans so we can do whippits and pretend we're the ones transforming when collecting powerups.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Jun 15, 2021)

Does anyone know where my Worms Armageddon disc is? We're supposed to play it for this week's tournament.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 15, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Does anyone know where my Worms Armageddon disc is? We're supposed to play it for this week's tournament.


How do you think Schmeckel and I got whip cream for whippits? Nahuhuhuh kidding, we have to be very careful with our stuff since sparkletor's detour into Raid: shadow legends has consumed him. BTW, if you ask him if he's been playing Raid, the answers no....always no. I made a compartment under the floor in the back right corner. I think Sparkles will take anything not bolted down.


----------



## General Tug Boat (Jun 15, 2021)

Agent ChickenFucker here, I'm ETA 10 minutes from the REEE compound.  I have the pasta sauce, I repeat I have the pasta sauce.  We are going to give his horse faced wife the best facial of her life, before uploading the footage to Derichs ultra super secret p0rn server.  Then we will be able to fund our continued efforts to commence internet shennegans while making troons rage on Twitter.


----------



## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jun 15, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> How do you think Schmeckel and I got whip cream for whippits? Nahuhuhuh kidding, we have to be very careful with our stuff since sparkletor's detour into Raid: shadow legends has consumed him. BTW, if you ask him if he's been playing Raid, the answers no....always no. I made a compartment under the floor in the back right corner. I think Sparkles will take anything not bolted down.


THEY JUST ADDED 11 NEW CHAMPIONS, GIVE ME A BREAK!


----------



## Schmeckel (Jun 15, 2021)

Hey guys, I went through an old box and found I had a copy of Total Carnage on the snes. Maybe we could play that in between other games?


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 16, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> THEY JUST ADDED 11 NEW CHAMPIONS, GIVE ME A BREAK!


Sparkletor. I'm just giving you a hard time lol. I just don't want to see you come into the treehouse and giving everybody a Dave style "money is really tight, your donations help the most right now because I get those funds immediately in my Rai...I mean bank account" speech


Schmeckel said:


> Hey guys, I went through an old box and found I had a copy of Total Carnage on the snes. Maybe we could play that in between other games?


I'm up for it but not sure about the others. Prince Lotor will be turning off the turbografx system soon


----------



## gh0stzero (Jun 25, 2021)

Hey fellers this weekend can we go back to worms for the tournament?

@Prince Lotor is banned though it turns out meth is a piformace enhancing drug or something

Someone should take turns playing tag with him to tire him out or something even if its like 2 against 1.

I brought pringles and sweets but I still want my dr. pepper the police stole when they took your chemistry set.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 25, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Hey fellers this weekend can we go back to worms for the tournament?
> 
> @Prince Lotor is banned though it turns out meth is a piformace enhancing drug or something
> 
> ...


Hey Trip! @Pretty Boy Extremism , @Schmeckel , and I were able to combine our money to rent a dog racing track for 30 minutes and put @Prince Lotor on the track to run. We replaced the bunny with a huge bag of meth and set the laps to 20. He willingly came with us to the track but did not enjoy the doctors on site taking his temperature nor wearing a muzzle. See you soon for the tournament!


----------



## Schmeckel (Jun 25, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Hey Trip! @Pretty Boy Extremism , @Schmeckel , and I were able to combine our money to rent a dog racing track for 30 minutes and put @Prince Lotor on the track to run. We replaced the bunny with a huge bag of meth and set the laps to 20. He willingly came with us to the track but did not enjoy the doctors on site taking his temperature nor wearing a muzzle. See you soon for the tournament!


I don't know... That rectal thermometer seemed to have him pretty excited, if you know what I mean.


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 25, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> I don't know... That rectal thermometer seemed to have him pretty excited, if you know what I mean.


Thanks for the laugh and I have nothing against @Prince Lotor...Just really goofy today.


----------



## Prince Lotor (Jun 25, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Hey fellers this weekend can we go back to worms for the tournament?
> 
> @Prince Lotor is banned though it turns out meth is a piformace enhancing drug or something
> 
> ...


That's fair. Honestly when I get like that you can just distract me with a laser pointer, my mom started doing that after she wouldn't give me her schizo meds anymore when I needed to calm down. I'll bring a couple to leave at the Reehouse next time I'm up.
I keep trying to buy you your Dr Pepper but every time I'm at the store that fucker on the Mr Pibb bottle talks me in to buying that. Sorry, I'll keep trying.







Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> Hey Trip! @Pretty Boy Extremism , @Schmeckel , and I were able to combine our money to rent a dog racing track for 30 minutes and put @Prince Lotor on the track to run. We replaced the bunny with a huge bag of meth and set the laps to 20. He willingly came with us to the track but did not enjoy the doctors on site taking his temperature nor wearing a muzzle. See you soon for the tournament!


Dood, I am going to catch that fucking rabbit! I want it! I WANT IT! He stole my fucking trucker pill pixy stix! When I catch him I'm going to chomp his neck and shake him back and forth until he drops my stuff! That'll teach him to laugh at me 


Schmeckel said:


> I don't know... That rectal thermometer seemed to have him pretty excited, if you know what I mean.


Look, all I'm going to say about rectal thermometers is this: 13m50s


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jun 25, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> That's fair. Honestly when I get like that you can just distract me with a laser pointer, my mom started doing that after she wouldn't give me her schizo meds anymore when I needed to calm down. I'll bring a couple to leave at the Reehouse next time I'm up.
> I keep trying to buy you your Dr Pepper but every time I'm at the store that fucker on the Mr Pibb bottle talks me in to buying that. Sorry, I'll keep trying.
> 
> 
> ...


You know Mr. Pibbs talks crap behind your back when you're not around right? He has everyone busting up. IDK if I wanna follow the link lol...have a feeling its payback. If you want a working class soft drink go for Royal Crown Cola but if you want a Dr. Pepper sub try the 3 liter grocery store brands.


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## Vapid_Idiot (Jul 6, 2021)

Why is Phil so popular with the black youtube gaming community? I see a lot of black creators making commentary on Phil. Is it because he has a lot of soul?


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## gh0stzero (Jul 7, 2021)

Prince Lotor said:


> That's fair. Honestly when I get like that you can just distract me with a laser pointer, my mom started doing that after she wouldn't give me her schizo meds anymore when I needed to calm down. I'll bring a couple to leave at the Reehouse next time I'm up.
> I keep trying to buy you your Dr Pepper but every time I'm at the store that fucker on the Mr Pibb bottle talks me in to buying that. Sorry, I'll keep trying.
> 
> 
> ...


ok you know what I'll take the mr pibb and forget about the dr pepper just make sure you get enough for me next time I'll settle for a cream soda if they don't have any mr pibb or if you drink it all or something if they don't have anything *bring back something* or I'll have to pry sparkletor away from his raid shadow legends game and have a talk about pulling up the rope ladder if you come round again.



Vapid_Idiot said:


> Why is Phil so popular with the black youtube gaming community? I see a lot of black creators making commentary on Phil. Is it because he has a lot of soul?


The reehouse council does have a diservity quota but we only hand pick the best detractors based on merit to be a tier one reeeeeehouse operator it takes days of training which might as well be years due to how tough the training is.


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## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 7, 2021)

Vapid_Idiot said:


> Why is Phil so popular with the black youtube gaming community? I see a lot of black creators making commentary on Phil. Is it because he has a lot of soul?


I'm guessing its because he sounds like he smoked 2 packs of Newports a day for the last 25 years and some basketball american tards find it soothing. Seriously though, I'm curious too. 


tripmix said:


> ok you know what I'll take the mr pibb and forget about the dr pepper just make sure you get enough for me next time I'll settle for a cream soda if they don't have any mr pibb or if you drink it all or something if they don't have anything *bring back something* or I'll have to pry sparkletor away from his raid shadow legends game and have a talk about pulling up the rope ladder if you come round again.
> 
> 
> The reehouse council does have a diservity quota but we only hand pick the best detractors based on merit to be a tier one reeeeeehouse operator it takes days of training which might as well be years due to how tough the training is.


You should see if you can find the Dr. Pepper with cream soda. It is sweet as hell...shows you why the U.S. is number 1 in Diabetes.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 7, 2021)

I would like to propose my theory:

Stupid people like DSP's content unironically

Black people are stupid

Thus black people like DSP unironically 

Remember that Tevin was a fan of Phil at first

Also, I do not play Raid: Shadow Legends anymore. Now I am playing Uncharted Waters Online.


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## Schmeckel (Jul 7, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I would like to propose my theory:
> 
> Stupid people like DSP's content unironically
> 
> ...


I'll trade you some pokeymans cards and a tekken fighter figure I found at the bus stop for your Raid: Shadow Legends account.


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## Prince Lotor (Jul 7, 2021)

tripmix said:


> ok you know what I'll take the mr pibb and forget about the dr pepper just make sure you get enough for me next time I'll settle for a cream soda if they don't have any mr pibb or if you drink it all or something if they don't have anything *bring back something* or I'll have to pry sparkletor away from his raid shadow legends game and have a talk about pulling up the rope ladder if you come round again.
> 
> 
> The reehouse council does have a diservity quota but we only hand pick the best detractors based on merit to be a tier one reeeeeehouse operator it takes days of training which might as well be years due to how tough the training is.


Me and Mr Pibbs are on the outs, heard he's been talking shit about me but he lies about it every time I ask. Dude's shady, I think he's a cop. 
Anyway my mom thinks I have the 'Rona because of my temperature, I'm not sick though, I keep telling her it's just my metabolism but she doesn't believe me. She won't let me leave the house and keeps taking my temperature 5 times a day. 
I told her what soda to get at the store so I can bring it to the Reehouse when I sneak out and she came back with Diet Dr Thunder and said it's the same thing. She's such a stupid bitch.
I'll stop off at the gas station on my way over, they stopped hassling me about my ninja costume since the 'Rona started so I can shop there again.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 7, 2021)

For realsies though, in only 4 days I got shadowbanned and shunned by the UWO community (probably around 100 active people) because I said the UWO wiki page was garbage.

Here's a link, tell me if it is trash
UWO Wiki

I just want to sail, bro. 

I also play Old School Runescape. Here is their wiki for comparison:
https://oldschool.runescape.wiki/

I am so upset right now. If anyone mentions Garfield Kart, I'm gonna do something drastic!!!!


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## Prince Lotor (Jul 8, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> For realsies though, in only 4 days I got shadowbanned and shunned by the UWO community (probably around 100 active people) because I said the UWO wiki page was garbage.
> 
> Here's a link, tell me if it is trash
> UWO Wiki
> ...


Dude, like half the shit doesn't even link to anything or has no info and just says 'Work in Progress' with a November 2010 date on it. 
It says the wiki was launched August 2010.
It looks like someone built a big index and then abandoned it before filling out the entries with information. It's a whole lot of nothing, just very organized nothing. 
The parts that are filled out just read like random half-assed walkthroughs.
It's garbage.


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## Schmeckel (Jul 8, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> For realsies though, in only 4 days I got shadowbanned and shunned by the UWO community (probably around 100 active people) because I said the UWO wiki page was garbage.
> 
> Here's a link, tell me if it is trash
> UWO Wiki
> ...


Great armies really follow instructions exactly like dad, killing all retreating threats.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 8, 2021)

There are so few UWO players, if anyone wanted to play with me, we could "make waves" in the game.

a Kiwi Navy

PM me or dont.


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## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 8, 2021)

I tried to get us fireworks but my state made them illegal guys. I was hoping we all could play top shop while drinking Dr Thunder and Mountain Rain then pass around a bunch of firecrackers taped together. The game is called digits....They play it in Russia.


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## gh0stzero (Jul 8, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> There are so few UWO players, if anyone wanted to play with me, we could "make waves" in the game.
> 
> a Kiwi Navy
> 
> PM me or dont.


I'm also putting together an MLG team for an....uhh orange cat cart racing game, PM if you want in on it



Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> I tried to get us fireworks but my state made them illegal guys. I was hoping we all could play top shop while drinking Dr Thunder and Mountain Rain then pass around a bunch of firecrackers taped together. The game is called digits....They play it in Russia.


Its probably for the best, the grown ups would go insane if they found us up late on a school night with fireworks.


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## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 8, 2021)

O-Cat Cart seems fun...and with the fireworks, I guess its the best thing but disappointed everyone still have all their fingers.


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## Preferred Penne (Jul 8, 2021)

tripmix said:


> I'm also putting together an MLG team for an....uhh orange cat cart racing game, PM if you want in on it
> 
> 
> Its probably for the best, the grown ups would go insane if they found us up late on a school night with fireworks.


Dude, you got your hands on Heathcliff Kart: XTreme Junkyard?


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## Schmeckel (Jul 8, 2021)

Preferred Penne said:


> Dude, you got your hands on Heathcliff Kart: XTreme Junkyard?


I found a used copy of Felix the Cat: Hyper Bumper Cars the other day. But I lost the controller for Dad's Pioneer LaserActive (and when he finds out, I'm going to be grounded so hard).


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 8, 2021)

howver lft a diksk off Beetle Baily: Erotic Off Road if wss nat a reel gamme and itt ptu a vrus onn myne comtutper!


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## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 9, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> howver lft a diksk off Beetle Baily: Erotic Off Road if wss nat a reel gamme and itt ptu a vrus onn myne comtutper!


What's the BAC that gets you to this point? Don't tell us you took a 3rd mortgage on the reehouse and spent it on Raid: Shadow Legends and 3 plastic jugs of grain alcohol.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jul 9, 2021)

Guys I found my old Dreamcast in the attic when are we gonna do some SoulCalibur tournaments?


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## gh0stzero (Jul 9, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Guys I found my old Dreamcast in the attic when are we gonna do some SoulCalibur tournaments?





Spoiler: Top Secret Message - SPARKLETOR IS NOT ALLOWED TO READ



Well I think we can do them now that the garfield kart tournaments wrapping up again I won btw because I was the only entrant and I finally beat that game on like the hardest difficulty 

I call dibs on Voldo though, he's OP and if you call him Dildo you get disqualified.


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## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 11, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Spoiler: Top Secret Message - SPARKLETOR IS NOT ALLOWED TO READ
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I'm up for some Dreamcast but wouldn't mind playing the game that shall not be named in front of Sparkles too. I want to let @Prince Lotor know I had to throw the Mr. Pibbs he was saving out the window. I was on an epic sugar high from eating 10 giant pixie sticks and started to hear Mr. Pibb talking crap about you again. IDK if He can be trusted...I heard the old miner from mountain dew's older logo is pretty nice though. He does get a little crazy if he has too much sugar or caffeine.


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## Schmeckel (Jul 11, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Guys I found my old Dreamcast in the attic when are we gonna do some SoulCalibur tournaments?


After that, can we play a little power stone? I never had enough friends to play that game two-player...


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## Big Brown Schlub (Jul 12, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> After that, can we play a little power stone? I never had enough friends to play that game two-player...


Of course


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 12, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> What's the BAC that gets you to this point? Don't tell us you took a 3rd mortgage on the reehouse and spent it on Raid: Shadow Legends and 3 plastic jugs of grain alcohol.


BAC of .380


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## gh0stzero (Jul 12, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> I'm up for some Dreamcast but wouldn't mind playing the game that shall not be named in front of Sparkles too. I want to let @Prince Lotor know I had to throw the Mr. Pibbs he was saving out the window. I was on an epic sugar high from eating 10 giant pixie sticks and started to hear Mr. Pibb talking crap about you again. IDK if He can be trusted...I heard the old miner from mountain dew's older logo is pretty nice though. He does get a little crazy if he has too much sugar or caffeine.


Oh well if we're breaking out the dreamcast we HAVE to play crazy taxi at some point.

Btw you put my Mr. Pibb out the window you better make sure its there for when I come back I don't care how you do it but I want my mr pibb > 

Prince Lotor is off the hook now its you thats on the hook for my drinks or you're banned from the garfield kart tournaments.


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## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 12, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Oh well if we're breaking out the dreamcast we HAVE to play crazy taxi at some point.
> 
> Btw you put my Mr. Pibb out the window you better make sure its there for when I come back I don't care how you do it but I want my mr pibb >
> 
> Prince Lotor is off the hook now its you thats on the hook for my drinks or you're banned from the garfield kart tournaments.


The old miner from the retro Mountain Dew logo said you'd be okay with it. He is a better mascot and keeps his mouth shut unlike Mr. pibbs and his loose lips. I'll try to find your Mr. Pibbs but its been like a day. Crazy Taxi!!! You got a light gun for House of the Dead 2? The acting is top notch. Man I miss dreamcast.


----------



## gh0stzero (Jul 13, 2021)

Rainyday Hedge Fund said:


> The old miner from the retro Mountain Dew logo said you'd be okay with it. He is a better mascot and keeps his mouth shut unlike Mr. pibbs and his loose lips. I'll try to find your Mr. Pibbs but its been like a day. Crazy Taxi!!! You got a light gun for House of the Dead 2? The acting is top notch. Man I miss dreamcast.


No for light gun entertainment we got vampire night for the PS2 somewhere I think.

How many consoles we got at the reehouse? I think we should get rid of a few if we're not using them my dad's electrical extension cord can only take so much.

And I don't care what that ten gallon hat wearing nudnik said I WANT MY MR PIBB OR DR PEPPER!!!1!!!

For real though didn't we all either have that friend who used crazy taxi just for the music or did it ourselves?


----------



## Philly May Lyrus (Jul 13, 2021)

tripmix said:


> No for light gun entertainment we got vampire night for the PS2 somewhere I think.
> 
> How many consoles we got at the reehouse? I think we should get rid of a few if we're not using them my dad's electrical extension cord can only take so much.
> 
> ...


I'll get you the Dr. Pepper with cream soda that's at least being sold in the states....so good the doctors will take your leg or Wilford Brimley's ghost may haunt you. He's Wilford Brimley and he has diabetes. Oh man, the music was great and the ps2/GC releases were horrible. They took away the music and name brands. Sega has usually had great arcade/game music. I also loved Top Skaters soundtrack. Though it was more limited.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Jul 26, 2021)

The Mountain Dew mascot is a hillbilly, not a miner. Mountain dew is old time slang for moonshine. Hillbillies make moonshine. The mascot is a hillbilly. 

Source


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## gh0stzero (Aug 10, 2021)

Schmeckel said:


> He probably reads the Secret Reehouse thread and takes all of the stupid shit contained within as actual plans and schemes by tractors to fuck with him.
> 
> "Um, khet?  I think someone snuck into the khamplex and is watching our real mature adult house.  I don't know how they got over the waist-high wall.  Better keep Ja$per Kitty away from the windows."


Why keep Jasper away from the windows? we're not gonna hurt the kitty we just wanna play with him.

Also he can't read the reehouse thread it says no grown ups on there. He'd be like...I dunno breaking kiwi farms TOS and thats against the law according to Phil


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Aug 11, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Why keep Jasper away from the windows? we're not gonna hurt the kitty we just wanna play with him.
> 
> Also he can't read the reehouse thread it says no grown ups on there. He'd be like...I dunno breaking kiwi farms TOS and thats against the law according to Phil


I can't put up a gate to keep the grown ups out, so I put a circle of toothpaste around the ree tree. I heard that works sometimes.


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## .moe (Aug 12, 2021)

Will someone pls halp me get a sample from Phil's foot, i want to see if he has gout?


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Aug 12, 2021)

.moe said:


> Will someone pls halp me get a sample from Phil's foot, i want to see if he has gout?


We successfully stole one of his shoes but since he never wears them since he never goes outside of his house there wasn't enough genetic material to get a concrete sample.


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## gh0stzero (Aug 12, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> We successfully stole one of his shoes but since he never wears them since he never goes outside of his house there wasn't enough genetic material to get a concrete sample.


Yeah I got it in operation sneaker snatch because I was gonna train Jasper to go potty in his shoes. 

Then you all laughed at me for trying to train a cat. I guess that was a stupid idea


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Aug 12, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Yeah I got it in operation sneaker snatch because I was gonna train Jasper to go potty in his shoes.
> 
> Then you all laughed at me for trying to train a cat. I guess that was a stupid idea


We all saw what a disaster it was when they taught Garfield to drive a go-kart.


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## .moe (Aug 13, 2021)

Has phil ever had a cootie vaccination?


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Aug 13, 2021)

.moe said:


> Has phil ever had a cootie vaccination?


We saw Kat kiss Phil on the cheek, and since girls have cooties, Phil also has cooties now. The 'circle circle dot dot' cooties shot only helps prevent cooties, if you get kissed by a girl you get cooties. 

Exceptions are if your mom or grandma or aunt kisses you. You can get cooties from kissing your sister or a cousin.

I'm not a medical professional, but I'm pretty sure about this.


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## gh0stzero (Aug 16, 2021)

Has someone been tampering with our communications? I swear it wasn't me this time but maybe someone should reset the PC in the reehouse just to be sure.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Aug 19, 2021)

I didn't think it would work, but our plot to get Phil to wear Nazi regalia went off unhitched. Great job gang. I got a 12 pack of Dr. Pibb for the reehouse this weekend.


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## gh0stzero (Aug 20, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I didn't think it would work, but our plot to get Phil to wear Nazi regalia went off unhitched. Great job gang. I got a 12 pack of Dr. Pibb for the reehouse this weekend.


oh nice I'll take 1 I'll bring popcorn and we can all bet food and sweets for what vest and hat Phil gets if any. I got 2 dr pibbs and a handful of toffee popcorn on denim and nazi hat.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Aug 29, 2021)

Next cult meeting will be at the usual place. Make sure to take your Strength and Honor pendant with you or your entry won't be permitted. Don't forget the password either, it's gonna be 𐌰𐌲𐌴𐌽𐍄 𐌾𐌰𐍃𐍀𐌴𐍂 this time. The meeting will be on the second of Tishrei in the year 二千二十一 when Sirius is most visible.

The Azure Sky is dead; The Yellow Sky will rise!


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## gh0stzero (Sep 1, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> We all saw what a disaster it was when they taught Garfield to drive a go-kart.


Hey Garfield kart is a high level competitive kart racer. It doesn't matter how much luck you got it all boils down to raw skill. Only the fastest racers can get good times in time trial, there is also a drift mechanic as well you need to learn how to daisy chain the drifts for maximum speed. It is literally the dark souls of cart racers.

I even made a video to show some frens how to get good at Garfield Kart


Spoiler


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## Super Dent Head (Sep 2, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Hey Garfield kart is a high level competitive kart racer. It doesn't matter how much luck you got it all boils down to raw skill. Only the fastest racers can get good times in time trial, there is also a drift mechanic as well you need to learn how to daisy chain the drifts for maximum speed. It is literally the dark souls of cart racers.
> 
> I even made a video to show some frens how to get good at Garfield Kart
> 
> ...


Thanks to this video, I'm now a professional Garfield Kart player. I'm heading to the play-offs soon for it too. Maybe I'll even win and get 4th place. We all know 4th place is the best.


----------



## Big Brown Schlub (Sep 7, 2021)

Operation Beating a Dead Birthday Horse went off without a hitch. Big ups to the detractors who crowded the diner they wanted to go to, the detractor who got a job at the Burger King and fucked up his order and the detractor who became the sushi chef at the Japanese restaurant and decided to take the day ahf that day.

The next cult meeting and op briefing will be at the usual place. Make sure to take a plate of nuggies and a carton of choccy milk with you to be permitted entry. The password will be Ⱅⰼⱂⱄ ⱒⰵⰾⱂ ⰿⰵ ⱅⱒⰵ ⰿⱁⱄⱅ. The date is the 9th of Ding-You, 4719 when the Star of Supremacy (Polaris) is obscured by the clouds.

हरे कृष्ण हरे कृष्ण , कृष्ण कृष्ण हरे हरे
हरे राम हरे राम , राम राम हरे हरे
હરે કૃષ્ણ હરે કૃષ્ણ કૃષ્ણ કૃષ્ણ હરે હરે
હરે રામ હરે રામ , રામ રામ હરે હરે


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## gh0stzero (Sep 7, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> Operation Beating a Dead Birthday Horse went off without a hitch. Big ups to the detractors who crowded the diner they wanted to go to, the detractor who got a job at the Burger King and fucked up his order and the detractor who became the sushi chef at the Japanese restaurant and decided to take the day ahf that day.
> 
> The next cult meeting and op briefing will be at the usual place. Make sure to take a plate of nuggies and a carton of choccy milk with you to be permitted entry. The password will be Ⱅⰼⱂⱄ ⱒⰵⰾⱂ ⰿⰵ ⱅⱒⰵ ⰿⱁⱄⱅ. The date is the 9th of Ding-You, 4719 when the Star of Supremacy (Polaris) is obscured by the clouds.
> 
> ...


I don't have chicken nuggies but some of the guys at the burger king parking lot gave me these gummy bears. I shared some with the rest of Task Force Joi and we stayed up late looking at the stars. I can bring some of them if that's ok?

Phil said they were druggies but they just had a sweet tooth for gummy bears is all.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Sep 7, 2021)

You bastard!

I ate the gummi bears and ended up playing Garfield Kart for 7 hours!


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## Quantum Diabetes (Sep 7, 2021)

Guys I just got a whole case of Roarin’ waters Caprisun and some new shrinky dinks, come to my backyard after Mom goes to bingo


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## Prince Lotor (Sep 7, 2021)

Whoever's idea it was to give yourself your insulin shots out front of the BK when Phil showed up that was fucking hilarious. Well done. I saved some push-pops for you in the REEhouse.


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## Reef-Raze (Sep 9, 2021)

I'm glad we all decided to meet up to celebrate a trolling well done at Friendly's!


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## Quantum Diabetes (Sep 9, 2021)

I’m asking weekend dad to get us a case for the treehouse 








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					drinktractor.com


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## gh0stzero (Sep 15, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> You bastard!
> 
> I ate the gummi bears and ended up playing Garfield Kart for 7 hours!


Yeah but what about the other 16 hours we played together after without the gummi bears?

I'm gonna need to get some visitor passes for the soul calibur 6 tournament so I'm gonna need my crayons and craft string back. I can make do without the craft string but I better get all 12 of those crayons back undamaged or I'm gonna have to have a sit down with Task Force Joi and Sparkles about pulling up the rope ladder on sight of certain people.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Sep 16, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Yeah but what about the other 16 hours we played together after without the gummi bears?
> 
> I'm gonna need to get some visitor passes for the soul calibur 6 tournament so I'm gonna need my crayons and craft string back. I can make do without the craft string but I better get all 12 of those crayons back undamaged or I'm gonna have to have a sit down with Task Force Joi and Sparkles about pulling up the rope ladder on sight of certain people.


I think someone swallowed the black crayon while we were making fun of Kat's sister. Sorry.


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## gh0stzero (Sep 17, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> I think someone swallowed the black crayon while we were making fun of Kat's sister. Sorry.


ok I'll allow that, I never used the black one anyway and that sounded fun lol


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## Fapcop (Sep 17, 2021)

How about Operations Jasper Pull?

We know Phil’s schedule and day off. I know a guy with a delivery truck.

Nobody will notice that driving into his neighborhood.

Break a window, grab Jasper (Phil surely keeps him locked up while he’s out which will make it easier.)

And then for the fun part of the plan.

We’ll do a stream (wearing blue T-shirt’s over our heads for anonymity of course!) and stream at the same time as Phil.

The best part is that Phil’s fans LOVE Jasper, so they’ll come over to our stream instead.

50$ and Jasper wears a little cute cat hat.
100$ and he’ll get to chase a toy mouse.
150$ and he gets dressed in an adorable, cat sized Hulk Hogan outfit.

We will hit Phil right where it hurts: His viewer numbers and his wallet!


BTW: This is a safe place, right? It would be terrible if any of this got back to Phil behind the scenes! He might try to foil the plan by hiding in the basement with Jasper on his days ahff.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Sep 20, 2021)

Operation: What Does the Kat Weigh is a go

We have the teeter-totter set up with 250 lbs. worth of sandbags.

Further details will be released


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## Quantum Diabetes (Sep 28, 2021)

Guise for our next meeting I got Danimals watermelon and strawberry goopy tubes, remember we’re going to insert heterosexual content into Scopelys servers at this one.


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## gh0stzero (Sep 29, 2021)

Quantum Diabetes said:


> Guise for our next meeting I got Danimals watermelon and strawberry goopy tubes, remember we’re going to insert heterosexual content into Scopelys servers at this one.


I tried dragging and dropping pictures of Stacy Keibler into the scopely window on the PC at the reehouse but its still not uploading them to the servers 



Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Operation: What Does the Kat Weigh is a go
> 
> We have the teeter-totter set up with 250 lbs. worth of sandbags.
> 
> Further details will be released


When we're done with the sandbags can we make a big sandpit so i can make sandcastles?


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Sep 29, 2021)

tripmix said:


> I tried dragging and dropping pictures of Stacy Keibler into the scopely window on the PC at the reehouse but its still not uploading them to the servers


That's because wrestling is gay


tripmix said:


> When we're done with the sandbags can we make a big sandpit so i can make sandcastles?


Yes


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## Quantum Diabetes (Sep 29, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> That's because wrestling is gay
> 
> Yes


Well there’s always the late Chyna who had enough muscle to satisfy Phil’s beefcake urges, that could be his gateway back to heterosexual urges


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## gh0stzero (Sep 29, 2021)

Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> That's because wrestling is gay


Oh well that explains it, but uh just leave the pictures of Stacy Keibler alone, I'll get them onto a floppy disk at some point.



Sparkletor 2.0 said:


> Yes


Nice! Just need people to remember to put the lid on the sandpit so Jasper doesn't think its a giant litterbox.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 14, 2021)

Operation: Slightly loosen the shower head was a success.

Barque's Root Beer will be available for all operatives until the 12 pack is empty.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 27, 2021)

I checked in with my cousin’s uncle’s next door neighbors janitor who cleans up at Scopely that Hulk Hogan’s Bonerquest 3 is entering development


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## gh0stzero (Oct 28, 2021)

Quantum Diabetes said:


> I checked in with my cousin’s uncle’s next door neighbors janitor who cleans up at Scopely that Hulk Hogan’s Bonerquest 3 is entering development


Can you see if they can recover the photos of Stacy Keibler I tried uploading to their servers? I managed to get it onto a USB drive but I think someone stole it


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 28, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Can you see if they can recover the photos of Stacy Keibler I tried uploading to their servers? I managed to get it onto a USB drive but I think someone stole it


They’re demaking them for the Wwe Divas Clam Slam game, I’m sorry dood


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Oct 28, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Can you see if they can recover the photos of Stacy Keibler I tried uploading to their servers? I managed to get it onto a USB drive but I think someone stole it


Was that a USB stick? I thought it was a vape pen that didn't work. I threw it away. Sorry.


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## gh0stzero (Nov 1, 2021)

Since everyone was distracted using the halloween thread last night I swapped board game top shop with garfield kart. But don't tell sparkles guys its a secret.

Also I need to see your bingo cards if you want the empty can of dr. pepper and empty bag of popcorn.

.....I got hungry.


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## Sparkletor 2.0 (Nov 1, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Since everyone was distracted using the halloween thread last night I swapped board game top shop with garfield kart. But don't tell sparkles guys its a secret.
> 
> Also I need to see your bingo cards if you want the empty can of dr. pepper and empty bag of popcorn.
> 
> .....I got hungry.


I KNEW IT WAS YOU, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!


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## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 24, 2021)

*DEBRIEFING

OPERATION PINOY PREDICAMENT*​
Primary Objectives:
Cause the target stress through messing up his DoorDash order - COMPLETE! 
Deliver new orders to Agent Jasper - COMPLETE!

Secondary Objectives:
Overcook parts of his meals - COMPLETE! 200 bonus points awarded!
Leave the bone on the meat - COMPLETE! 150 bonus points awarded!
Force the target to slice the meat - COMPLETE! 150 bonus points awarded!
Make the delivery late so his food arrives cold - COMPLETE! 300 bonus points awarded!
Cause the target to go on an unhinged rant - COMPLETE! 500 bonus points awarded!

Bonus:
Perfect stealth - 100 bonus points awarded! 
Goldust gathered - 351 251 bonus points awarded!

SCORE: 1651
FINAL RANK: SSS+++​

Mission complete and how! They're gonna tell stories about this one, Boss!
Big ups to the detractors who infiltrated the restaurant as chefs and left the meat unsliced and attached to the bone on purpose. That has caused the target much unnecessary stress and challenge. Also big ups to the detractor who intercepted the delivery and delivered to other people before Phil on purpose so that he gets his food cold, that caused additional sanity damage which the target will attempt to fix with gin. Nuggies and cartons of choccy milk will be given to all participants as a reward for great service.


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## gh0stzero (Dec 27, 2021)

Pretty Boy Extremism said:


> ​Big ups to the detractors who infiltrated the restaurant as chefs


Thanks fren

They were so impressed with me they said I can work saturdays

Also who's playing with that mail order weather machine and making it snow outside Phils? We need ice for ice skating guys not snow.


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## TheGoutburglar (Dec 27, 2021)

tripmix said:


> Also who's playing with that mail order weather machine and making it snow outside Phils? We need ice for ice skating guys not snow.


I think my attempts at building a time machine are interfering with it, sorry. Fucking space-time continuum is wonky, and now there's a neandarthal in my backyard using my grill as a house. That, or a crazy hobo with a serious forehead.


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## gh0stzero (Jan 2, 2022)

TheGoutburglar said:


> I think my attempts at building a time machine are interfering with it, sorry. Fucking space-time continuum is wonky, and now there's a neandarthal in my backyard using my grill as a house. That, or a crazy hobo with a serious forehead.


Its working too well. Phil's not able to get doordash. We don't want to starve him or Jasper.

Especially Jasper, so tone down your experiments for the good of the kitty.


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## Prince Lotor (Jan 3, 2022)

TheGoutburglar said:


> I think my attempts at building a time machine are interfering with it, sorry. Fucking space-time continuum is wonky, and now there's a neandarthal in my backyard using my grill as a house. That, or a crazy hobo with a serious forehead.


According to my SpongeBob tarot deck the timeline we are in Phil is going to die at 47 from undiagnosed Prostate cancer.
He never makes the appointment out of fear he finds out he likes boys doing butt stuff to him because he is so deeply closeted, and due to his erectile dysfunction and shame over 'The Incident' he never cleans out the pipes and things just fester in there until he dies.

I did a reading for him and I got Bikini Bottom in the 4th position crossed by Squidward reversed in the 6th.
Literally the old starfish is going to cause him painful problems while he ignores it and pretends nothing is wrong until he dies from it.


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## TheGoutburglar (Jan 3, 2022)

Ana De Armas said:


> Its working too well. Phil's not able to get doordash. We don't want to starve him or Jasper.
> 
> Especially Jasper, so tone down your experiments for the good of the kitty.


I figured out the problem, shouldn't be any issues from my machine anymore. Can't promise about that satellite I spotted with the SoK emblem on the side, though. Didn't like the look of that thing.


Prince Lotor said:


> According to my SpongeBob tarot deck the timeline we are in Phil is going to die at 47 from undiagnosed Prostate cancer.


Yeah, I think I already fucked that up. Of course, I'm assuming tarot readings only reveal events, if they can actually set them in stone once read, we're fine. Been two days since my machine was activated, so presumably anything read yesterday still stands.

Of course, the reason I'm building the thing is as a last resort against the apocalypse, just in case Phil happens to trigger one. Shows how desperate I am, to be risking causing it myself in the process. But better me than the pigroach, eh?


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## Burl McMillan (Jan 12, 2022)

Big ups to our sleeper agents in the Renton Garbage Collectors' Union who pushed for a labor dispute with the company that services Phil's area and backed up a month's worth of trash in his garage.


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## Schmeckel (Jan 12, 2022)

Burl McMillan said:


> Big ups to our sleeper agents in the Renton Garbage Collectors' Union who pushed for a labor dispute with the company that services Phil's area and backed up a month's worth of trash in his garage.


As a hidden agent that hides out in the pig-garage, I can confirm the musty smell of ammonia and feces is pretty terrible.  The union better get off their ass, or else I'll have to abandon post.  This is utterly disgusting.  And, I haven't been in the khando in several weeks, so I can only imagine what THAT must smell like.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Feb 18, 2022)

I finally got a case of New Coke for the Reehouse and we’re testing the beta of “Hogans Boner jam slams” for the Turbografix-16 guise, Mom’s letting us make Totinos pizza rolls in my ez-bake oven and everything.


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## We Are The Witches (Mar 29, 2022)

This thread is lovely.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Mar 29, 2022)

I got a case of Caprisun Goutberry splash for our weekly meeting guise, it’s extra tangy. Mom said you can bring your sleeping bags and stay over this time cuz school is cancelled


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## SPhobos (May 16, 2022)

I have just tranquilized Kat as she was hunched over on all fours besides a river trying to catch salmon for Phil's dinner.

Edit: On closer inspection this is actually a fully grown bear and not Phil's wife. Sorry for the false alarm.


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## FormerPro (May 19, 2022)

As an incredibly booksmart but not streetsmart person I have a job working at Youtube. 

Me and the guys decided to stall the launch of gifted memberships until the 21st fell on a Saturday so Phil's viewers spend all of their money on gifted subs instead of tipping him. With any luck the delay in weekend payment processing and Phil's lack of tips will lead to him having no money for his day off next week. Instead of going out to eat he's going to have to stay home and eat a Lunchmeat Sandwich.


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## Gotta Groom Em All (May 24, 2022)

I’m gonna get a job delivering food for DoorDash in Renton but I’m only going to work Tuesday late afternoons.


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## DukeMorty (May 24, 2022)

Gotta Groom Em All said:


> I’m gonna get a job delivering food for DoorDash in Renton but I’m only going to work Tuesday late afternoons.


If Phil is reading this he will be super paranoid about using DoorDash now. I can see the next preshit podcast where he explains that trolls have sabotage his DoorDash and that now they cannot eat or do Feasting with the Pigroach so they need to step up and give him more money to get air dropped meals from the military. Honestly, I am surprised a troll hasn't done this yet. 
I might just work for Amazon delivery in Renton to see what he gets. Time to execute Wolf In Amazon Sheepskin.


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## Gotta Groom Em All (May 24, 2022)

DukeMorty said:


> If Phil is reading this he will be super paranoid about using DoorDash now. I can see the next preshit podcast where he explains that trolls have sabotage his DoorDash and that now they cannot eat or do Feasting with the Pigroach so they need to step up and give him more money to get air dropped meals from the military. Honestly, I am surprised a troll hasn't done this yet.
> I might just work for Amazon delivery in Renton to see what he gets. Time to execute Wolf In Amazon Sheepskin.


Oh, it’s confirmed he reads here every night between swigs of gin. He also spends the majority of his day off lurking here between WWE Champions pulls. There is no “if.”

He’ll think he’s outsmarted me by ordering from Grubhub, but I’m already ten steps ahead of him and signed up to work for every delivery service we have here. Uber Eats, Postmates, all of them. I’ll be watching like a hawk for his address to pop up in the queue.

Phil, when I inevitably have the honor of delivering some greasy sugar chicken to the gout fortress, I won’t be rude. I’m not actually a dick IRL so I won’t tamper with your food or anything. I won’t record it or even document my experience on KF. I will simply smile, give you your bag, and wish you a nice rest of your day before disappearing like a ghost. You’ll never know it was me.


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## SPhobos (Jun 26, 2022)




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## Big Brown Schlub (Oct 4, 2022)

Agent CTE calling all other agents. It's been a while since we stopped being grounded and we still didn't have a secret meeting. A lot has happened and we need to discuss that, plus we need to plan new ops.

The meeting will be held ante diem V Kalendas Octobribus MMDCCLXXV AUC. I think that meridies would be a good time of day. Also make sure to wear the secret detractor talisman and remember the password for entering the reehouse, for this meeting it will be Ⱁⰱⰲⰻⱁⱆⱄⰾy Ⰻ ⱀⰵⰵⰴ ⱅⰻⱂⱄ

Strength and Honor.

PS: Can Agent Joi please return my copy of SoulCalibur II? You've had it for 3 months already.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Oct 11, 2022)

Big Brown Schlub said:


> Agent CTE calling all other agents. It's been a while since we stopped being grounded and we still didn't have a secret meeting. A lot has happened and we need to discuss that, plus we need to plan new ops.
> 
> The meeting will be held ante diem V Kalendas Octobribus MMDCCLXXV AUC. I think that meridies would be a good time of day. Also make sure to wear the secret detractor talisman and remember the password for entering the reehouse, for this meeting it will be Ⱁⰱⰲⰻⱁⱆⱄⰾy Ⰻ ⱀⰵⰵⰴ ⱅⰻⱂⱄ
> 
> ...


We’re meeting at the abandoned Rax restaurant, on the right side parking lot. Nobody at the weed next door shop notices anything, it’s cool mah dood.

My dad works for McDonald’s corporate and we’ve got advance merch of Street Fighter Happy meals. I’ll give everyone one if they bring snacks and beverages, bitch mommy only has Cherry Bubly cans and no amount of Mio makes them taste any better.


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## Big Brown Schlub (Dec 27, 2022)

Agent Jasper has successfully neutralized Phil's capture card and is awaiting new orders. Meeting will be at the old place during the next full moon. We need to find a volunteer who will pass new orders to Agent Fly on the Wall (still can't believe DSP hasn't caught him hiding under his work shoes) so he can in turn give Agent Jasper his new target. Recommendations for new targets is welcome, the Snort Fort is a target rich environment after all.


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## The Penultimate Warrior (Dec 27, 2022)

Big Brown Schlub said:


> Agent Jasper has successfully neutralized Phil's capture card and is awaiting new orders. Meeting will be at the old place during the next full moon. We need to find a volunteer who will pass new orders to Agent Fly on the Wall (still can't believe DSP hasn't caught him hiding under his work shoes) so he can in turn give Agent Jasper his new target. Recommendations for new targets is welcome, the Snort Fort is a target rich environment after all.




Get him to piss on that noisemaker. I don't think that even counts as trolling, because breaking that thing would be making the world a better place.


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