# Henstepl takes the Schizophrenia Test (featuring a glass of soda)



## henstepl (Jan 1, 2021)

I have previously described a test for glutamate hypofunction, which usually implies schizophrenia. (If you're following my case, it's because I have a plain deficiency, which is different.)

Now my serine supplement has run out for the night and I've slipped back into glutamate-negative mode, so I've filmed myself taking the test.

View attachment 1823077

The test is: put your fingers on the tops of your cheekbones and find the zygomaticus minor muscles. Flex that muscle and everything above it in the face. Loosen everything beneath it, and let some soda into your mouth from a glass or a fingered straw. If you experience involuntary facial movements, this is because you have glutamate hypofunction, and likely schizophrenia.

Why does this work? It goes back to schizophrenic "reduced affect display". I'd take a moment to clarify that schizophrenic reduced affect display is actually "strict affect": the inability to move the top half and bottom half of the face at once. The facial exercise I describe forces facial expression into the top half of the face, which leaves the bottom half susceptible to "carbonation grimace".

Carbonation grimace "at rest", without facial exercises, is different. That would imply you have Florian syndrome.


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## CivilianOfTheFandomWars (Jan 1, 2021)

Okay sweetie, please promise me you won’t burn something down again.


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## Maskull (Jan 1, 2021)

Take your meds, schizo.


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## BingBong (Jan 1, 2021)

oh shit. he's back.


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## Least Concern (Jan 1, 2021)

I think self-diagnosing schizophrenia and other mental afflictions isn't such a great idea. Let's leave that to the experts.


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## Aquinas (Jan 1, 2021)

I, a schizophrenic, grimace everytime i read your posts, is that some sort of symptom aswell?


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## Dick Pooman (Jan 1, 2021)

@henstepl Do you think any of this is related to "guitar grimace"? It seems many prominant musicians make involuntary facial contortions when certain notes or note clusters are made. 



Spoiler: Examples


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Jan 1, 2021)

Why if I grimace and then belch right after?
Am I sane or not?



CivilianOfTheFandomWars said:


> Okay sweetie, please promise me you won’t burn something down again.


Shut up, arson is cool.


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## Arm Pit Cream (Jan 1, 2021)

I have no fucking clue why, but OP included a video of him "testing" himself by drinking soda and describing his symptoms on some easy upload service rather then directly uploading it.




Your browser is not able to display this video.


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## henstepl (Jan 1, 2021)

Arm Pit Cream said:


> I have no fucking clue why, but OP included a video of him "testing" himself on some easy upload service rather then directly uploading it.
> View attachment 1823077



I ended up posting the thread without a video at all because it turned out to be freezing in the middle of the upload to KiwiFarms. So I had to find a quick solution. Thanks for resolving the issue, I'm slightly dopey because I haven't had my Serine again tonight.


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## Arm Pit Cream (Jan 1, 2021)

henstepl said:


> I ended up posting the thread without a video at all because it turned out to be freezing in the middle of the upload to KiwiFarms. So I had to find a quick solution. Thanks for resolving the issue, I'm slightly dopey because I haven't had my Serine again tonight.


Null fucked it up so when you press insert it doesn't load properly, I was confused for weeks too so you can't really be to blame, don't worry. Anytime.


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## Yellow Yam Scam (Jan 1, 2021)

henstepl said:


> I ended up posting the thread without a video at all because it turned out to be freezing in the middle of the upload to KiwiFarms. So I had to find a quick solution. Thanks for resolving the issue, I'm slightly dopey because I haven't had my Serine again tonight.



You should go to a proper barber. This is genuine advice.


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## Jaded Optimist (Jan 2, 2021)

"Like the squirming of a squid on a bed of soya sauce"
@henstepl, I may not agree with your ideas, but I do love your writing/narration.


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## henstepl (Jan 2, 2021)

Least Concern said:


> I think self-diagnosing schizophrenia and other mental afflictions isn't such a great idea. Let's leave that to the experts.


I don't intend to jump anybody to the point where they'd say they have schizophrenia. But there's a notion that there isn't an "objective diagnostic test", and if we can dispel that notion from a pool of a thousand diagnosed schizos and a thousand normies, we'll learn a lot about the disease. If reduced affect display is really my "strict affect", and if I can identify serotonin with the upper half of the face and dopamine the lower half, I can tell you that improving schizophrenic cognition is as simple as choosing one or the other, and reducing its opponent.

That is, resolve cognition by resolving strict affect - Type A, or Type B, and it's best to alternate.


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Jan 2, 2021)

Jaded Optimist said:


> "Like the squirming of a squid on a bed of soya sauce"
> @henstepl, I may not agree with your ideas, but I do love your writing/narration.


I’d definitely read his writing before I’d read one of Chris’ incoherent ramblings.


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## Mariposa Electrique (Jan 2, 2021)

Arm Pit Cream said:


> I have no fucking clue why, but OP included a video of him "testing" himself by drinking soda and describing his symptoms on some easy upload service rather then directly uploading it.
> View attachment 1823077


Those facial tics are probably a result of schizophrenia, not soda itself. I know a certain little lady who's looking for a day in 2021. Her name is Tommie Jayne Tooter and she loves animals and children. She has schizophrenia too, I'll give you her number.


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## henstepl (Jan 2, 2021)

Mariposa Electrique said:


> Those facial tics are probably a result of schizophrenia, not soda itself. I know a certain little lady who's looking for a day in 2021. Her name is Tommie Jayne Tooter and she loves animals and children. She has schizophrenia too, I'll give you her number.


Those facial tics vanish when I medicate with serine (co-agonist of NMDA, the specific glutamate receptor implicated in schizophrenia). So does the crisis of mind aka "can't stand to have dopamine and serotonin at once". It's a test for the source of schizophrenia psychosis.

Classical schizophrenics probably have a lower NMDA/non-NMDA glutamate ratio than I do. I haven't got any glutamate on any front. It would be interesting if AMPA/kainate caused me to become psychotic.


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## Massa's Little Buckie (Jan 2, 2021)

You should post this on your thread. Also, please stop burning shit.


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## JoshPlz (Jan 2, 2021)

henstepl said:


> I'm slightly dopey because I haven't had my Serine again tonight.


I heard that Sarin proved very effective in treating schizophrenia too. There were some ethical concerns though.


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## L50LasPak (Jan 2, 2021)

Least Concern said:


> I think self-diagnosing schizophrenia and other mental afflictions isn't such a great idea. Let's leave that to the experts.


I mean, you can't really argue with results.


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## NoodleFucker3000 (Jan 2, 2021)

I have a psychotic disorder and I fucking LOVE carbonated water... debunked?


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## Grinrow (Jan 2, 2021)

NoodleFucker3000 said:


> I have a psychotic disorder and I fucking LOVE carbonated water... debunked?


Bullshit, film yourself drinking a glass of carbonated water and upload it


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## henstepl (Jan 2, 2021)

NoodleFucker3000 said:


> I have a psychotic disorder and I fucking LOVE carbonated water... debunked?


"A psychotic disorder" doesn't mean schizophrenia, and, you've only proven you don't have Florian syndrome (carbonation grimace at a rest). The test for schizophrenia involves sipping soda from a glass, not a bottle, while maintaining a precise exercise in the top half of the face. I've described the instructions for attaining this face in the original post.


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## Maskull (Jan 2, 2021)

henstepl said:


> The test for schizophrenia involves sipping soda from a glass, not a bottle, while maintaining a precise exercise in the top half of the face.


What difference does drinking from a glass have from drinking out of a bottle? What happens if you leave all the muscles in your face lax?


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## No. 7 cat (Jan 2, 2021)

This is the legend who burnt down the asylum. Show respect.


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## henstepl (Jan 2, 2021)

Maskull said:


> What difference does drinking from a glass have from drinking out of a bottle? What happens if you leave all the muscles in your face lax?


The entire point is to tighten muscles in the upper half of the face and leave the muscles in the lower half of the face loose. A bottle will require a small amount of lowerface effort, and I _just_ don't anyone to throw the test off. As a matter of fact, I was recommending you drop soda in from a fingered straw before I concluded a glass was easy enough to work with.

If there is no facial exercise (and all the muscles in the face are at rest) then no carbonation grimace would be expected.


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## GHTD (Jan 2, 2021)

I love how bullshit your "low glutamate means schizophrenia" theory is. It is a real theory but not only has there been a lack of evidence to prove it causes schizophrenia, but any time they try to treat the "glutamate source" it shows little to no effectiveness.

Please get help, and don't burn down the psychiatric office in the process this time.


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## henstepl (Jan 2, 2021)

GHTD said:


> I love how bullshit your "low glutamate means schizophrenia" theory is. It is a real theory but not only has there been a lack of evidence to prove it causes schizophrenia, but any time they try to treat the "glutamate source" it shows little to no effectiveness.
> 
> Please get help, and don't burn down the psychiatric office in the process this time.


Glutamate is the spooky neurotransmitter. It's so ubiquitous but the question of What Does It Do is so much less straightforward than for serotonin or norepinephrine. But its rules are rules I learn because I absolutely have to learn them to function.

NMDA is a subtype of glutamate receptor, and that's the one that's linked to schizophrenia. Glutamate hypofunction across the board, rather, is what I have, and that's Florian syndrome, which isn't psychotic. We have to ask what happens if you're positive for non-NMDA and negative for NMDA, and vice versa, and perhaps we have to look further between the non-NMDA subtypes - AMPA and kainate, which makes it even more difficult. I'm currently experimenting with theanine, a non-NMDA antagonist, and waiting for conclusive results.

In the end, it will be very informative if a thousand confirmed schizophrenics show carbonation grimace when they perform the precise facial exercise I describe, with a sip of soda.


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## Trigger Me Timbers (Apr 11, 2021)

@henstepl my friend drank carbonated beverages like a fool and now he says he’s a girl and post images of himself on discord with “programmer socks”.

was this because of the carbonation?


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