# Gun to your head, who would you rather have sex with: Null or your very first crush?



## Nathan Higgers (Dec 22, 2020)

I feel like doing your very first crush would be more sentimental, but kind of underwhelming... but then again I'm not gay so doing it with Null would be homo.

That gun is fully loaded and is just begging shoot something... What would you do Kiwi-bros?


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## Hongourable Madisha (Dec 22, 2020)

What if Null is my first crush?


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## The Real SVP (Dec 22, 2020)

Null is still alive. At least he has that going for him.


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## Penis Drager (Dec 22, 2020)

My very first crush turned out to be stupid hot. You should see them, really, just to get an idea of how hot they've become.
He goes by "Null" these days, FYI.


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Dec 22, 2020)

Fuck, I don't even remember who my first crush was, so Null I guess.


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## Samson Pumpkin Jr. (Dec 22, 2020)

You Have To Come To Brazil


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## Miss Misery (Dec 22, 2020)

Porque no los dos?


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## Strange Wilderness (Dec 22, 2020)

The one who has a vagina. So Null


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## Shadfan666xxx000 (Dec 23, 2020)

Are we fucking the present version of our crush or the past version and if so, do we get charged?


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## Nathan Higgers (Dec 23, 2020)

Shadfan666xxx000 said:


> Are we fucking the present version of our crush or the past version and if so, do we get charged?


Present version, of course. There's a freaking gun to your head, that's the goddamned charge!


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## Ol' Slag (Dec 23, 2020)

Crush. Big titties dont disappear.


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## Miss Misery (Dec 23, 2020)

Shadfan666xxx000 said:


> Are we fucking the present version of our crush or the past version and if so, do we get charged?


Spoken like someone who's got a thing for Null the Minor.


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## Shadfan666xxx000 (Dec 23, 2020)

Nathan Higgers said:


> Present version, of course. There's a freaking gun to your head, that's the goddamned charge!


She's a hot goth so yeah.


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## IAmNotAlpharius (Dec 24, 2020)

First crush she’s aged well


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## Dwight Frye (Dec 24, 2020)

First crush. Best blowjob I ever had was from them. Don't think Null could top that....unless he wants to prove me wrong of course.


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## Idiotron (Dec 24, 2020)

My first crush looks fine.
She's not a 10 or anything but she's a cute blond girl.


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## heyitsmike (Dec 24, 2020)

I'll take the gun.


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## Jaded Optimist (Dec 24, 2020)

Let's Find Out! said:


> Spoken like someone who's got a thing for Null the Minor.


Spoken like a shad fan.


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## Battlecruiser3000ad (Dec 25, 2020)

i need more details to answer this question.

1) is null the bottom
2) how long do we have


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## Nathan Higgers (Dec 25, 2020)

Battlecruiser3000ad said:


> i need more details to answer this question.
> 
> 1) is null the bottom
> 2) how long do we have


1) you take shifts being the bottom
2) until the person holding the gun is disgusted (and he is a deviant mofo so you know he ain't getting disgusted easily)


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## Nathan Higgers (Dec 22, 2020)

I feel like doing your very first crush would be more sentimental, but kind of underwhelming... but then again I'm not gay so doing it with Null would be homo.

That gun is fully loaded and is just begging shoot something... What would you do Kiwi-bros?


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## Battlecruiser3000ad (Dec 25, 2020)

Nathan Higgers said:


> 1) you take shifts being the botton
> 2) until the person holding the gun is disgusted (and he is a deviant mofo so you know he ain't getting disgusted easily)


Alright, so that's easy then.

I bet my first crush is fat now anyway


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## JamusActimus (Dec 25, 2020)

The dillema is quite weak it should be your crush but in the form you firt saw her.

So a kid/pre teen most likely.

Pretty sure some prefer to be gay than pedo


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## Pissmaster (Dec 27, 2020)

What if my first crush was an anime girl


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## Simply Outplayed-HD (Jan 2, 2021)

It's gotta be Null.


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## Luminous47 (Jan 3, 2021)

Hard choice... idk, probably my crush. Sorry Null, you seem nice and all but i’m not homo...


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## Mr. Skeltal (Jan 5, 2021)

Null is the only illicit lover I need.


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## Blackhole (Jan 6, 2021)

I'd fuck Null. my first crush was a 2d waifu,so null is preferable.


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## Never Scored (Jan 12, 2021)

TFW your first crush was your mom.


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## Quantum Diabetes (Jan 12, 2021)

My first crush was a thicc Phoebe Cates lookalike so, sorry Josh


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## Niggernerd (Apr 30, 2021)

The gun


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## Just Dont (Apr 30, 2021)

Null hands down. 

The guy is smart, funny, has massive balls for hosting a site that makes fun of everyone and everything, isn't a chubby fuck or pencil neck faggot, has money and takes care of himself.


Pic for reference:


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## Cheerlead-in-Chief (Apr 30, 2021)

Null


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## Bastard_Call (Apr 30, 2021)

What kind of retarded hypothetical is this?


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## catholiclutheran (Apr 30, 2021)

My first crush died of cancer when we were in the second grade. Having sex with a skeleton would be weird, but at least I can't get fucked in the ass  by one.


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## Solid Snek (Apr 30, 2021)

catholiclutheran said:


> My first crush died of cancer when we were in the second grade. Having sex with a skeleton would be weird, but at least I can't get fucked in the ass  by one.


Does it count as child abuse if the skeleton is over 18...?


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## Troonologist PhD (May 1, 2021)

No idea what my first crush is like now, so I pick the gun.


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## Disgruntled Pupper (May 1, 2021)

My first crush is hot but a happily married homo, so probably Null. We could have awkward, underwhelming fat people sex and then look at Beauty Parlor threads together. It'd be like a shitty tinder date but with someone who I don't have hide my association with the Farms from.


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## Monkey_Fellow (Jun 3, 2021)

First crush for sure, Null i'd still fuck you bro no worries.


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## Poppavalyim Andropoff (Jun 5, 2021)

Ol' Slag said:


> Crush. Big titties dont disappear.


they sag a lot though


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## DDBCAE CBAADCBE (Jun 5, 2021)

Easy, my first crush turned out hot.

Edit: To be fair though Null isn’t the ugly fuck you’d think he’d be. He isn’t my type but I’d say he’s handsome at the very least.


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## Nathan Higgers (Dec 22, 2020)

I feel like doing your very first crush would be more sentimental, but kind of underwhelming... but then again I'm not gay so doing it with Null would be homo.

That gun is fully loaded and is just begging shoot something... What would you do Kiwi-bros?


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## RW 1995 (Jun 18, 2021)

my first crush is gross so Null


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## Shiversblood (Jun 18, 2021)

My first crush is a female with a vagina and null is a male with a anus so I choose first crush


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## formershroomeryuser (Jun 19, 2021)

Shiversblood said:


> My first crush is a female with a vagina and null is a male with a anus so I choose first crush



Hell of an answer. First crush had vagina vs male with anus. Chosing Null as male with anus would be a homosexual decision whereas first crush with vagina is straight so the brave Catholic Priests won't disagree you won't be pissing Jesus off and besides it feels better and things of that nature.


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## formershroomeryuser (Jun 19, 2021)

Hongourable Madisha said:


> What if Null is my first crush?



Now this. This is tough


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