# Kiwi Farms Secret Santa 2019



## José Mourinho (Nov 26, 2019)

Even before Kiwi Farms and since the times where we discuss just mainly Chris, Secret Santa was a yearly tradition for the forum, and welcome to our 8th!

Rules are simple and same as previous ones:

(Copied from previous thread with very minor changes)

*1. The gift must be something you made yourself.*

It must be something you created, and something transferable via PM

*Acceptable*

Art you made
A photo
A story you wrote
A game you made
Music you wrote yourself
Any media you yourself have created.
*Unacceptable*

Electronic Gift Cards
Purchased Digital Content
Any media you did not make yourself.
Anything purchased with cash.

Simply put, this is something from the heart and must be something that you did not pay for. This also includes anything purchasable that you received for free, so if you have an extra game key, that is still unacceptable. This must be something you made yourself.

*2. The gift must be appropriate*

_Photoshop’s of shock images, such as goatse and 9/11 are never acceptable._ Bobs and vagene are tho.

*3. Please turn it in on time.

Sign-ups* will last until *December 7th*. You will receive your assignment sometime that weekend. From there you have until *December 24th* to *turn in your gift*. If you cannot create your gift in time, you have until *December 18th* to *drop out* without punishment. If you fail to turn in a gift and do not give an explanation, you will not be allowed to participate in future Secret Santa events.

*4. Sign up requirements.*

In order to participate you must:

Be in good standing (As in, not a shit head)
Have not been banned from Previous Secret Santas.
EDIT: Forgot to mention about helpers. Would like to have around* 5 helpers* for this Secret Santa, which involves assuring whether the gifts are handed in on time. Let me know if you want to be one!

I will also be asking for people to be a *X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000.* If you have been here before, you know the drill. *I need people to make back up gifts in case a Santa is unable to deliver a gift, so if you are willing to do an emergency gift, let me know.*

To sign up, just post in this thread with the following:

Name (Your account name of course)
Likes
Dislikes
Fun Fact About You
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?
*Helpers *

@MerriedxReldnahc
@NOT Sword Fighter Super
@ProgKing of the North

*Participants*
* indicates being a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000

@Jaded Optimist
@Senor Cardgage Mortgage
@NOT Sword Fighter Super *
@HeyItsHarveyMacClout
@Scratch This Nut
@wrangled tard
@Kari Kamiya
@slimes *
@MerriedxReldnahc *
@MemeGray
@mr.moon1488
@UnKillFill
@weedsneaker13
@MysticMisty
@Coelacanth
@Rick Pratt
@PumpkinSpiceBitchMeringue *
@Sundae *
@I Love Beef
@Fougaro
@Memeanon
@snailslime
@Oban Kamz
@saralovesjuicyfruit
@DontDoxThanks
@betterbullocks
@Kaiser Wilhelm's Ghost *
@YourMommasBackstory *
@Jewelsmakerguy *
@_blank_ *
@TheImportantFart
@Sofonda Cox *
@ChurchOfGodBear
@'tism take the wheel
@Get_your_kicks_with_30-06
@Oscar Wildean
@skiddlez
@PsychoNerd054
@Samoyed
@diana *
@Haunter *
@FixinShibe
@Spearfished Sardines
@Cantaloupine *
@PururinSenpai
@Fandom Trash
@Monika H. *
@Rotogravure
@Overly Serious
@The Jokester
@Trusty Patches *
@Y2K Baby *
@Kurosaki Ichigo
@Chan Fan
@Farmer Dave
@ProgKing of the North
@The 8 of Spades
@ATaxingWoman
@Pissmaster General
@Haramburger
@Pickelhaube
@The Last Stand
@Mao Hao Hao
@Autisimodo


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## Jaded Optimist (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: Jaded Optimist


Likes: Cute animals, Elder Scrolls: Morrowind, lady yelling at cat memes, thunder storms, cooking unusual cuts of meat, resin casting, mycology, blackpowder firearms 


Dislikes: The fact that avacodos aren't crazy expensive but every place still charges a ton to add guacamole, Trudeau, the new Star Fars films, tomatoes.


Fun Fact About You: I kind of regret changing my user name after the great leak of 2019


Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Nope


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## The Cunting Death (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: Senor Cardgage Mortgage 

Likes: Homestar Runner, Mother 3, cartoons, Monster Hunter World, Oingo Boingo

Dislikes: forced memes

Fun Fact: _________________________________________________________________________ur a fagt_______________________________________________________________

Able to be an X-Mas Spirit Bot 9000? Sure


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: NOT Sword Fighter Super

Likes:  Old 8/16 bit pixel art.  Weird/crazy people.  Fuck, I don't know what else to put here.

Dislikes: Fake people (again, I don't know what to put on these fucking things)

Fun Fact: I can down an Irish carbomb so fast it defies logic

X-Mas Spirit Bot 9000: yes.  I did it last year and it was cool.


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## HarveyMC (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: HeyItsHarveyMacClout (Harvey MacClout)
Likes: History, war, Chris, Paradox Interactive, beer
Dislikes: Furries
Fun Fact About You: One time back in high school I was specifically sought out by the head of our Model UN club to represent our school in the Historical Unification of Germany committee, despite never having done MU before, because I was apparently famous for knowing a fuck ton about industrial Europe/Germany
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: No


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## Scratch This Nut (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: Scratch This Nut

Likes: Pokémon, unicorns, coatis, Disney movies, A24 horror movies, Studio Ghibli, Animal Crossing, Black Mirror, Neil Gaiman, porgs (fite me irl)
Dislikes: Politics, white men, Solo: A Star Wars Story, being stabbed
Fun Fact About You: I have been parasailing in the Dominican Republic.   Also I’ve been to Mexico twice. 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Never


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## wrangled tard (Nov 26, 2019)

Name (Your account name of course): wrangled tard
Likes: Fallout, VtM, Dark Souls, Pathologic, cute animals, not cute animals, insects, arachnids.
Dislikes: Fallout 76, VtM V5, Dark Souls 2. I agree with Sword Fighter, I don't know what else to put here.
Fun Fact About You: I hate fun and I hate facts.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: No.


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## Kari Kamiya (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: @Kari Kamiya 
Likes: Chinese cartoons, of course (Weeb Wars AOTY); laughing at dumb shit like the Game Freak meltdown this year; reading; "lul randem XD" 'cause I'm still immature
Dislikes: Gross weeb shit and that modern anime is just... painfully medicore; college students and everything they do; that my cat yowls for treats so early in the morning
Fun Fact About Me: I like going on long walks when I should be more productive elsewhere.
Can you be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: Can't, sorry.


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## slimes (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: slimes
Likes: tentacle art (I mean yeah hentai but also just eldritch aesthetics), funfacts, D&D, science fantasy, 80s/90s schlock anime
Dislikes: new animes, spiders, ugly art, uwu kawaii moe shit
Fun Fact About You: I once had to teach a class on the history of tentacles in hentai. It was a trip.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? I can do 5 bot santas


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## Oskar Dirlewanger (Nov 26, 2019)

Name: Oskar Dirlewanger
Likes: tits, lifting weight, guns, knives, cats
Dislikes: nerds, white people
Fun Fact About You: i'm NOT a fed
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: nah


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## José Mourinho (Nov 26, 2019)

I forgot to mention that I would like some *helpers* to help out for the Secret Santa, which involves assuring whether the gifts are handed in on time. Let me know if you want to be one! 

Those who were helpers at previous Secret Santas as well as staff members get higher priority! Would like to get around 5 too.


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## MerriedxReldnahc (Nov 27, 2019)

Name: MerriedxReldnahc

Likes: Animals, heavy metal (both the music and the magazine), Frazetta-esque fantasy art, aliens and monsters and shit, skateboarding. 

Dislikes: Not being able to open carry a battleaxe in my state. 

Fun Fact About You: I own around 20 animal skulls. 

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?:
 I might be able to, I will certaintly make the time if called upon.



José Mourinho said:


> I forgot to mention that I would like some *helpers* to help out for the Secret Santa, which involves assuring whether the gifts are handed in on time. Let me know if you want to be one!
> 
> Those who were helpers at previous Secret Santas as well as staff members get higher priority! Would like to get around 5 too.


I would like to help out!


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## MemeGray (Nov 27, 2019)

Name: MemeGray

Likes: big titty anime Gyaru, Dark souls, elder scrolls 4, lame puns, crappy fanart

Dislikes: memes, x-men

Fun fact: despite being useless at most things i'm signing up for this, apologies in advance to whoever I get!

Able to be an X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?
Nope


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## mr.moon1488 (Nov 27, 2019)

Name: Mr.moon 1488

Likes:  Boobs, beer, bacon, explosions, guns, the white race.  

Dislikes: (((them))) and bad table manners.

Fun Fact About you:  I once let my dick dangle in the breeze as I jumped out of a plane over Poland (This actually isn't just a shit post, almost smacked into a tree)  

Able to be a X-mas spirit bot 9000?:  Maybe


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## UnKillShredDur (Nov 27, 2019)

Name - UnKillFill
Likes - The obvious from my name, the 90's, and.. (to a slightly lesser extent) the 80's- both in general, Batman, capeshit from either of those decades, sci-fi, anything anti-PC, dumb jokes.
Dislikes - SJWs, political correctness, stupid people, politics. 
Fun Fact About You - I can't stand Will Smith these days. 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? No, but maybe next year.


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## Revo (Nov 27, 2019)

Name: weedsneaker13
Likes:landscapes, beautiful scenery , laughing at exceptional individuals
Dislikes:weebs, anime, attention whores, people who use the buzzwords like _racist, nazi, fascist, antisemite, islamophobe, homophobe_
Fun Fact About You: I can't stand ads that appeared in the most interesting moments on TV and YT videos.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? No


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## MysticMisty (Nov 27, 2019)

Name: MysticMisty

Likes: Cats, Dragonball Z, DuckTales, Pokemon, The Sims, Animal Crossing, volcanoes, Chrono Trigger, Christmas, tropical locations, turkey, the Mario series

Dislikes: A Christmas Story, ham, pit bulls, centipedes

Fun Fact About Me: I don't mind the extreme heat of Arizona's summers

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000: No, sorry


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## Coelacanth (Nov 27, 2019)

*Name: *Coelacanth
*Likes: *Pokemon, coelacanths, the Earthbound/MOTHER games, Terraria, Metal Sonic and E-102 Gamma, isopods, the works of Junji Ito, pixel art, Gorefield, Touhou, Clock Tower, Ao Oni, the works of LumpyTouch and Silent Hill.
*Dislikes:* SJWs shitting up my favourite franchises to make them more "progressive", Jacob Sockness, Undertale and kids raised in the UK who're so badly behaved that they make CWC look like a saint.
*Fun Fact About Me: *I'm hypermobile and can bend my fingers in unusual ways.
*Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: *Not this year I'm afraid.


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## Rat Speaker (Nov 27, 2019)

Lol. Didn't this die with the old guard? 



Oskar Dirlewanger said:


> Name: Oskar Dirlewanger
> Likes: tits, lifting weight, guns, knives, cats
> Dislikes: nerds, white people
> Fun Fact About You: i'm NOT a fed
> Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: nah


Lol nigger you have an ass ton of user blocked, I hope it comes from one of them. Faggot.


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## Rick Pratt (Nov 28, 2019)

Name: Rick Pratt
Likes: Classic Rock, Cats, Rocky Horror, Cartoons, Drawing, Writing  and British comedies
Dislikes: Channel Awesome, Carrots, and Piers Morgan
Fun Fact About You: I'm just signing up for this because I like making art for people
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: no thanks


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## Jaded Optimist (Nov 28, 2019)

It seems that it's going to be a small pool this year.

Interested my favorite art fags? @BOLDYSPICY! and @jenffer a jay?


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## PumpkinSpiceBitchMeringue (Nov 28, 2019)

Well it wouldn't hurt giving it another go. 
I hope I don't screw it up.


*Name*: PumpkinSpiceBitchMerengue
*Likes*: Cats, stars and nebulas, carnivals, hipster shit: antiques, holidays, Moby, JJBA
*Dislikes*: Big Meanies >:[, "urban music" and death punk, edgy shit: Coldsteel, anything #woke, modern art, people who doubt Epstein didn't kill himself
*Fun Fact About You*: When I was a kid, a celebrity was playing basketball at a friend's house and he accidentally crashed into me. It was my fault, I was in the way.
*Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?*: I'm conflicted on this, but I do want to lend a hand in any way.


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Nov 28, 2019)

I’ll be a helper if ya still need one.


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## jenffer a jay (Nov 28, 2019)

Jaded Optimist said:


> It seems that it's going to be a small pool this year.
> 
> Interested my favorite art fags? @BOLDYSPICY! and @jenffer a jay?


about time too if you me some xmas art just pr like all ways with what me to draws


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## Jaded Optimist (Nov 28, 2019)

jenffer a jay said:


> about time too if you me some xmas art just pr like all ways with what me to draws


Jenffer you were my secret Santa one year, I've never been more lucky


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## Sundae (Nov 28, 2019)

*Name*: Sundae
*Likes*: Aesthetic memes (includes vaporwave music), surf rock, electro swing, the tropics, Godzilla/Kaiju films, the Moai statues of Easter Island, awesome military craft (tanks, planes, etc.), TMNT, Ghostbusters, Garfield, 80s music
*Dislikes*: communism, animal cruelty
*Fun Facts About You*: I'm currently working on multiple novels I hope to publish one day (if I could just get past my damn writer's block), as well as a few game ideas
*Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?*: nope (edit) ah what the hell, I'll give it a shot


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## I Love Beef (Nov 28, 2019)

Hey everybody, how are you all doing?

Name: I Love Beef

Likes: The anime & manga art style, art in general, BEEFU, video games, martial arts, self improvement, Japanese culture, Classic 1990s &1980s Americana, writing stories and drawing comics, sake, hot and good women who like wearing white boots and are proud of their femininity, sunny skies, justice and fairness

Dislikes: Assholes, beligerence, hypocrisy, disrespectful people, mosquitos

Fun Fact about me: I am an expert wasp killer, and I've been around the net since 1998

Secret Santa Bot 9000?: Too drunk right now, but sounds good, will let you know before the deadline


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## Fougaro (Nov 29, 2019)

It was fun the last time.

*Name:* Fougaro

*Likes:* Barry White, Velvet Crowe from _Tales of Berseria_, _JoJo's Bizarre Adventure_, weebshit in general, 80s glam metal, stuff that glows in the dark

*Dislikes:*  People who enable shitty behaviour, the current school system and other such forms of child abuse

*Fun Fact about me:* I have a terrible sense of orientation

*Secret Santa Bot 9000?:* Not this time.


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## Slowpoke Sonic (Nov 29, 2019)

name: memeanon
likes: surreal memes, sonic, emo rap, counter strike, laughing at tards
dislikes: theneedledrop, college art hoes, nostalgia critic
fun fact: i can drink 20 cans of diet dr pepper per day 
able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: nah wtf


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## snailslime (Nov 29, 2019)

Can we send nudes?

Name - snailslime
Likes - anime/weeb stuff, food, music, gamus, memes
Dislikes - incels, reddit
Fun Fact About You - i have a samoyed
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? maybe


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## (((Oban Lazcano Kamz))) (Nov 29, 2019)

Name : Oban Kamz 

Likes: graffiti, anime, salty snacks, lawn darts and jello

Dislikes: jimmy fallon, obsessed disney fags and Polo™

fun fact about me: i like giving and receiving gifts, its just fun to give somebody something. 

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? no thanks


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## saralovesjuicyfruit (Nov 29, 2019)

Name: saralovesjuicyfruit

Likes: laughing, animals, cooking, exercise, plants

Dislikes: bathroom humor, narcissists, violence 

Fun Fact About Me: I used to be a girl scout 

Able to be an X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? I don't think so, sorry


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## DontDoxThanks (Nov 29, 2019)

Name: DontDoxThanks
Likes: League of Legends, Fallout/Skyrim uhhh, Hitman, literally any music at all. Gw2, Animals, like all of them. I am a very liking person, chances are I'd 99.99% love what you made :-) (I'm actually less exceptional in real life, I promise)

Dislikes: ... Rude customers? I guess? Scally kids? 

Fun fact: .... .... .... I never know when to finish a project so if your secret Santa is late... It's me sorry mate

Xmas spirit bot - I wish, if you let me know I'll see what I can do but I can't promise anything


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## betterbullocks (Nov 30, 2019)

Name: betterbullocks
Likes: Lofi and aesthetic shit, Roman history, cyberpunk, bossa nova, stand up, retro vidya, comfy anime, trippy artwork, STEM related things, philosophy, nature, knives, cherry red 1984 c4 corvettes with chrome rims and fuzzy dice
Dislikes: Probably anything sexual from someone here, furries included
Fun Fact About You: I've played piano for roughly 11 years and I'm still mediocre but this my only creative outlet so expect music
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Probably not


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## Kaiser Wilhelm's Ghost (Nov 30, 2019)

Name: Kaiser Wilhelm's Ghost
Likes: History, painting, drawing, writing, sci-fi and fiction, most art pre-post modernist, absurdist humor, and observing the inanities of spergs, gardening. 
Dislikes: Commies, Neon Nazi's, Puritanical types and SJW's and generally ignorant or low intelligence people. Also aspects of nerd culture 
Fun Fact About You: I've owned and smoked pipes for a number of years. I prefer Cavendish tobacco's for smell, but also really love English blends and Orientals for flavor. That said I actually don't enjoy cigarettes.   
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Yes. It will be remarkably low effort, but yes.


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## YourMommasBackstory (Nov 30, 2019)

Name: yourmommasbackstory
Likes: cute things, good food, art, dogs (PUGS), retrowave, tasty rum, hot cocoa, soulse-born soundtracs, rythm games.
Dislikes: twitter, pumkins, warm weather.
Fun Fact About You: I actually know that your mom is a decent and kind woman, kiwi. 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Ye, why not.


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## war has changed (Nov 30, 2019)

I would sign up, but surely nobody wants a story aka a text walls as a present...


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## Jewelsmakerguy (Nov 30, 2019)

Copypasta'd from the 2018 thread:

*Name *@Jewelsmakerguy
*Likes*: Animation and art, cars, 80s music, robots, stupid and odd media.
*Dislikes*: Stupid people, SJWs, reality shows (the Survivor/Amazing Race ones, not the enjoyably dumb TruTV ones), green peppers, 2010s music.
*Fun Fact*: Been wanting to get into a creative occupation like carpentry.
*X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000:* I'm getting a new drawing tablet in a few days, so definitely yes.


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## _blank_ (Nov 30, 2019)

It's the reason for the season!

*Name *@_blank_ . Pronouns are Blank, Blank, and BeByeBickyByeBickyByeBoBlank

*Likes*: Sleep, Caffeine-infused Sleep, Blackout Sleep, Edgy Chicks With Eyes Like Lazers and Wayy Too Many Tattoos, Caffeine, Unnecessary Capitalization, Clutch, Electric Six, Sturgill Simpson, Swearing, Jesus, and Caffeine.

*Dislikes*: Forced Happiness, The Force, Fandoms, Fing Fang Foom, the word "Floppy." The Woke, The Broke, and the Perpetually Offended. Disney and everything the Rat has stuck its fetid cock into. Also Grandpa Ronnie said drugs are bad, so no drugs - Just hugs and ultraviolence for me!

*Fun Fact*: I share the same birthday as Matthew McConaughey, and Adriana Chechik, which is interesting because I too sound like I'm constantly having a stroke and I'm constantly getting fucked over.

*X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000:* Hit me up Santa, you sassy bitch (that's a yes).


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## Fougaro (Nov 30, 2019)

war has changed said:


> I would sign up, but surely nobody wants a story aka a text walls as a present...


Depends. Last year a user got a Christmas Carol as a present and liked it.


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## Just a boring name (Dec 1, 2019)

I would like to be a Little Helper,  please.
I'm up for joining the secret santa too and will answer the questions in a bit.


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## TheImportantFart (Dec 1, 2019)

Name: TheImportantFart

Likes: _Star Wars_, creepypastas, guitar, R.E.M, Pixies (the band, not the mythical creatures), Genesis (again, the band, not the bible book), that Killstream where Sargon tries and fails to pitch GamerGate 2.0, Pokemon, RedLetterMedia, _Doctor Who_, bears, rabbits.

Dislikes: Skeptic community/IDW fanboys, unironic commies/alt-righters, BreadTube, the UK Lib Dems and Labour Party (Tories ain’t much better, but the enemy of my enemies and all that), people who sperg about “muh culture war” and huff their own farts (so essentially everyone I mentioned above), horror and slasher films, heights, spiders.

Fun Fact About Me: I have climbed over the Millennium Dome.

Can you be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: Unlucky again I’m afraid.


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## Providence (Dec 1, 2019)

Name Sofonda Cox
Likes: doom, gloom, a tidy tomb
Dislikes: smiles, children, artificial heat, dairy,  medical equipment, advertisements, rainbows,  beaches,  the sea and everything in it, cinnamon, Irish people and Ireland itself, menstruating, mud, Springtime, bare feet, moles (on the human body, not the poor little critters), retards, saliva, repetitive noises,  exercise of any kind, two-piece pajamas, the user above me,  the user below me, Florida, mysterious odors with well- hidden sources, the vast majority of living authors, musicians and actors. 
Fun Fact: I was charged by a bull shark, and richly deserved it. 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Sure, provided my responsibilities are very clearly defined.


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## ChurchOfGodBear (Dec 2, 2019)

Name: ChurchOfGodBear

Likes: 80s comics, chicken wings, boobs, barbecue, science fiction

Dislikes: most social media trends, mainstream media news, Cole Smithey, arguing about smartphones

Fun Fact About You: people are surprised when I curse, but I do it all the fucking time.

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Not this year, sorry.


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## 'tism take the wheel (Dec 2, 2019)

Name: 'tism take the wheel

Likes: 90's Edward Furlong (before he got fat and started hitting his girlfriends), Sword Art Online (fuck you, I thought it was good), Final Fantasy, umm...making fun of Amberlynn

Dislikes: eh I'm not a tight-ass. Whatever...

Fun Fact About Me: Je parle un français un petit peu...J'ai etude pour sept ans, mais mon accent est tres horrible...

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000: ? Still not completely sure what that entails...NewFag Here Sorry...


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## Get_your_kicks_with_30-06 (Dec 2, 2019)

Name: Get_your_kicks_with_30-06

Likes: Guns, History, Historical guns, Various forms of metal (death, thrash, some progressive metal), Fallouts 1-NV (Especially New Vegas), Mechanical systems, The US of A, cheap cigars from the gas station, dark humor, big tits

Dislikes: Anime, Pretentious shit, gay shit, annoying people, card reading door locks, when your contact gets a very tiny tear in it, stoner culture, slow people (as in not fast not retardation well...), cars that have LED headlights, most sports

Fun Fact: I own an M1 Garand so yeah I can PING whenever I want jealous?

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: Nah


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## Dolphin Lundgren (Dec 3, 2019)

*Name:* Oscar Wildean
*Likes:* British shows, Edwardian and Victorian related things, Titanic, Elephants, Impressionist art, Dylan Moran.
*Dislikes*: Complainers, reboots, people who only talk about politics, modern art
*Fun Fact:* I love the rain.
*Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?* Sorry, no.


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## skiddlez (Dec 3, 2019)

likes: sunshine, lollipops, rainbows and everything that's wonderful is what I feel when we're together, stalker shadow of chernobyl (and other stalker games), doom (all doom games), hotline miami, dark souls (1), medieval stuff, frogs, toast with strawberry jelly, pizza, retro stuff, drag racing, and ass

dislikes: bad news, bees

fun fact: I don't need a gift so if you get me you can just whip up whatever you want really

spirit bot: nah


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## PsychoNerd054 (Dec 3, 2019)

Name: @PsychoNerd054
Likes: Mathematics, Physics, Bizarre Sonic Avatars, the 1990's, some of the 1980's, Guacamole, Chips and Dips
Dislikes: Tomatoes, Weeb Shit, Almost anything Disney, dumb internet trends
Fun Fact: I don't love myself enough to think of trivia for myself.
X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: Maybe, I'll be readily available if needed.


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## Samoyed (Dec 3, 2019)

Name: Samoyed
Likes: Doggies, Kitties, Salad, Suns and moons, Snow and Bumblebees
Dislikes: Scary stuff, taco bell, sad people and chocolate.
Fun Fact About You: I am a god.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: No because this is my first year doing this.


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## diana (Dec 3, 2019)

@José Mourinho I notice the participation so far is kind of lacking, is null not going to advertise this year's secret santa on the front page like before?

Also:
Name: @diana
Likes: League of Legends, animal crossing, flowers, my dog, and witches.
Dislikes: Shitty presents
Fun fact about you: I call my dog the Goblin Girl.
X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: Like always, I'm available to do as many makeup presents as I have time for.


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## Haunter (Dec 4, 2019)

*Name:* @Haunter
*Likes:* 20th Century Philosophy, Russia and the Slavs, Jungle, early Drum & Bass, early Dubstep, Team Fortress 2, joining in on dum shit, drawing and cartoons, espresso.
*Dislikes*: Humourless people, being tired, contemporary cultural trends like Furries, "Nerds", and reboots.
*Fun Fact:* I've read everything by J. G. Ballard.
*Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?* Eh, sure.


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## Shibaru (Dec 4, 2019)

Name: FixinShibe
Likes: Automotive, Retail, Technology, Emulation, Art, Radio, Design from the 80s and 90s, Vaporwave, and City Pop
Dislikes: Forced Relationships, People who Lie, Minimalism, Modern Design and Online Shopping
Fun Fact: I’ve got an Emulator up and running of Initial D Arcade Stage 8 recently 
Able to be a Spirit Bot? No


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## Spearfished Sardines (Dec 4, 2019)

Name: Spearfished Sardines

Likes: Visiting new places, Pokemon, Animal Crossing, cats, history, photography, old Sims games, collecting postcards
Dislikes: People who yell on the bus, people who yell at others for shit that's not their fault, oranges, lemons
Fun fact: I played the oboe when I was in school, and to this day I wish I never had to quit. 
Able to be a Spirit Bot: Not this time, maybe next time though.


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## Cantaloupine (Dec 4, 2019)

Best time of year, count me in!

Name: Cantaloupine
Likes: MHA, Pokémon, Warcraft, Fire Emblem 3 Houses, puppies, moths.
Dislikes: Not much! Aside from furries.
Fun fact: I have absolutely no musical talent and I would trade my art skills for it if I could.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: Absolutely! The more the merrier!


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## Purin Chan (Dec 4, 2019)

*Name:* _PururinSenpai_
*Likes:* _Anime (FLCL, Evangelion, Monogatari Series, Cardcaptor Sakura, Nichijou)  (embarrassing, I know), Drawing, Cartoons, Vidya (RPGs & Visual Novels), Shitposting, Cartoon/Anime porn :^)._
*Dislikes: *_Twitter troons and generally obnoxious people._
*Fun Fact About You:* _I'm double jointed in my left thumb and can bend it all the way back._
*Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?:* _I'm extremely new to this so for the time being, no._


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## Fandom Trash (Dec 5, 2019)

Ya!! I get to do this again!!


Name - *FandomTrash*
Likes -- *My Hero Academia, Persona 5, Art, Cats, and Anime*
Dislikes -- *Not much*
Fun Fact About You -- *I Love to draw silly cartoons*
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? --* Sorry, can't!*

Can't wait for this!


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## Monika H. (Dec 5, 2019)

What the heck, I'm giving it a shot.

Name - *Monika H. *
Likes -- *Reading, writing, good movies and food, evening walks; German, Russian, Italian, Czech and British national histories*
Dislikes -- *Vulgarity outside context*
Fun Fact About You -- *Actually a nice, not racist gal IRL, I got an awful lot of Monikas in my life*
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? --* Ja, I'll give it a shot.*


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## Rotogravure (Dec 5, 2019)

Name -Rotogravure
Likes -- History.  Biographies, Light Historical Fiction, MMOs, English Humor, Cattes und Dogges.
Dislikes -- Dumb people, Anchovies, Braunsweiger
Fun Fact About You -- I am writing a BA thesis on a local historical house and the historical house museum industry.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? -- Sorry, no.


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## Overly Serious (Dec 6, 2019)

Name: Overly Serious
Likes: Sexy women, insightful politics, the music video to Dracula's Tango by Toto Coelo, Capitalism and The Venture Bros.
Dislikes: War, Identity Politics, Reddit
Fun Fact About You: Once boarded a moving train James Bond style because I thought it would be cool and I was too stupid in my twenties to think I could die.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: I don't tknow what this is because I didn't bother to properly read the opening post but it sounds like a mobile vending machine that only dispenses egg nogg. So no.


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## The Jokester (Dec 6, 2019)

Name: The Jokester 
Likes: Batman (especially anything to do with Earth 3 hence my name), comics, cooking, sabaton, military shit, laughing at spergs 
Dislikes: Leftists and degenerates
Fun Fact: I spent my time in a nightclub knitting in the smoking area 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000: Nah m8


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## Trusty Patches (Dec 6, 2019)

Name: Trusty Patches
Likes: Dark Souls, make up, fat cat pics, cringe, the nation of Israel
Dislikes: stale memes
Fun fact: i just won a court case after I got hit and run at a pedestrian crossing 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000: within reason, sure


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## Y2K Baby (Dec 6, 2019)

Name (Pulaski Child)
Likes: Olive
Dislikes: Not impotent
Fun Fact About You: I hate this site.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? OK,


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## omori (Dec 7, 2019)

Fuck yeah my favorite time of the year on the kiwi clock!

Name: Kurosaki Ichigo
Likes: Corvids, vulture culture, theme park spergery, DnD (my characters are a kenku rogue and a silver dragonborn warlock), arts n stuff.
Dislikes: tumblr, disingenuous people, hot days
Fun fact: i can dislocate my thumbs
Secret santa bot: eh no time, sorry.


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## José Mourinho (Dec 7, 2019)

Signups will be extended for *another day*, and I'll update the list!



diana said:


> @José Mourinho I notice the participation so far is kind of lacking, is null not going to advertise this year's secret santa on the front page like before?


Didn't ask him at the time sadly.


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## Rat Speaker (Dec 7, 2019)

@José Mourinho if I give you money will you exclude @Oskar Dirlewanger?


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## Chan Fan (Dec 7, 2019)

I'm in!

Name: Chan Fan
Likes: Murdoch Murdoch, Chris Chan, 1984 (the book,) Nintendo games, Lord of the Rings, Millennium (the TV show,) Silent Hill
Dislikes: drama, sad stuff, needless gore
Fun Fact About You: I love putting books in those free book boxes
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Nope, sorry


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## Farmer Dave (Dec 7, 2019)

Name: Farmer Dave
Likes: American Dad
Dislikes: Sprite.
Fun Fact About You: I once won a raffle.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000: no.


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## ProgKing of the North (Dec 7, 2019)

ProgKing of the North

Likes: prog, classic rock and jazz, animals, fantasy, sports, classic Simpsons, stuff that makes me laugh
Dislikes: culture war shit from either side, Robert Christgau, pit bull haters, attempts at humor that fail to make me laugh
Fun Fact: I'm autistic, but not as much as you'd think by reading my posts
Able to bot?: Don't think I'm suited to that task, but willing to be a helper


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## Pope Negro Joe the XIIIth (Dec 7, 2019)

Sure, I'll join in again.

The 8 Of Spades
Likes: Satire, disasters, goth shit, vidya, reading. 
Dislikes: sappy things, Pictionary for Nintendo, stupid people.
Fun Fact: I'm actually a lot more fun than my posts let on.
Bot?: Probably not, sorry.


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## ATaxingWoman (Dec 7, 2019)

I thought I had signed up already, but apparently not!

Name: ATaxingWoman
Likes: catching tax evaders, Japanese shit (especially from the 70s/80s and anything Meiko Kaji/Sukeban related), Soviet shit from the Perestroika era, literature, East Asian cinema, post-punk and new wave, video games, languages, 20th century history in general, beautiful women, coffee, reading about lolcows and their drama
Dislikes: tax evaders, Islam, troons and TRAs, wokes (especially "woke" nice guys), incels, furries, sexual degeneracy, the current state of Sweden, annoying noise, obesity, sports
Fun Fact About You: I'm scared of wasps
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? Don't think I'll have time so no


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## Pissmaster (Dec 7, 2019)

Name: Pissmaster
Likes: Vidya, animals, the few Youtubers I watch, writing huge tl;drs, @Chan Fan
Dislikes: Politics
Fun Fact About You: EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. ITS HARDCORE HENRY AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, HENRY. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME OF CYBORG BASTARDS OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ESCAPED THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS PSYCHOKINETIC MANIAC. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY COLLEGE CLASS AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN COLLEGE CLASS CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JEKRS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE LINES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY APARTMENT LESS LONELY BY SHOUTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNIng 
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?: no thank you


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## Haramburger (Dec 7, 2019)

Haramburger
80's and 90's X-Men, bideo games, vaporwave/synthwave music, the under-appreciated art of sci-fi/fantasy book covers as collected by Spectrum annually(and some album covers by former bands), the now-difficult-to-find Spin-Out® brainteaser and those like it, pickles, and paranormal television featured on late-night History & Travel channels(and partially Discovery & Science)
libtards, sausage links, soybeards, country music, 90's avengers and that faggy purple & blue outfit Hawkeye wore, NBA
I can make that water droplet noise Cameron does in Ferris Bueller's Day Off where he flicks his cheek and that makes people think they got a text or facebook alert so it's a more valuable skill than ever these days
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? No


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## Meat Pickle (Dec 8, 2019)

Name: Pickelhaube
Likes: History, Ice Cream, Christory, video games, pickles
Dislikes: Furries, aspic, weeens, people with disgusting fetishes
Fun Fact About You: I once got a hat drop in TF2
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000?:Yes


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## The Last Stand (Dec 8, 2019)

Is it too late to sign up?


Name. The Last Stand
Likes: Overwatch, The Golden Girls, French Toast, cars
Dislikes: Fortnite, zoomers, politics, /pol/
Fun Fact About You: I've moved at least 16 times in 21 years.
X-MAS SPIRIT BOT? No thank you.


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## Mao Hao Hao (Dec 8, 2019)

Oh no, I forgot about this! Hope its not too late, I enjoyed last years.
Name: MaoHaoHao
Likes: Anime, Games, Most animals, Diseases/Microbiology, Gangsters (typically Mafia or Yakuza).
Dislikes: Politics, Ticks/mosquitos/other annoying insects, badly made/seasoned food.
Fun Fact About You: I have no gag reflex.
Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? No, sorry


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## Autisimodo (Dec 8, 2019)

I really hope I'm not too late to join. (If so I'll do it next year)

Name: Autisimodo

Likes: Warhammer 40k, older animes, military history, regular history, oldschool Blizzard games, old video games in general, Spirits/Liqour, Sunrises and Sunsets, Heavy Metal, Thrash Metal. I also like the Beach.

Dislikes: Anime Culture (Weebs), Political Autism, Redditors, Beer, cheap or processed food, Trooncels and CWC wéens.

Fun Fact About You: I'm teaching myself to be ambidextrous.

Able to be a X-MAS SPIRIT BOT 9000? This is probably my first time doing this so probably not (No. Sorry)


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## Haramburger (Dec 9, 2019)

> *Sign-ups* will last until *December 7th*. You will receive your assignment sometime that weekend.


Assignment _WHEN_


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## saralovesjuicyfruit (Dec 9, 2019)

Haramburger said:


> Assignment _WHEN_




Yeah come on I'm ready to get a strong read on my match and get to down to business! Crayola model magic and shit


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## José Mourinho (Dec 10, 2019)

Those who signed up late are in the list. I will do the assignments right now!


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## José Mourinho (Dec 10, 2019)

Updating this thread to let you know that I have sent assignment PMs to some of those who participated for this Secret Santa. The helpers should be able to PM the rest. Good luck all and have fun!


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## Haramburger (Dec 10, 2019)

José Mourinho said:


> The helpers should be able to PM the rest.


@MerriedxReldnahc @NOT Sword Fighter Super @ProgKing of the North


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## ProgKing of the North (Dec 10, 2019)

Everybody on my list will have their message within 20 minutes, stupid time limit between pms

Edit: and they have all been sent, have fun, faggots


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## Haramburger (Dec 11, 2019)

ProgKing of the North said:


> Everybody on my list will have their message within 20 minutes, stupid time limit between pms
> 
> Edit: and they have all been sent, have fun, faggots


satisfied, fuck the rest of you(helpers and those waiting for assignments alike)


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Dec 11, 2019)

All my assignments are out.
I look forward to seeing what you guys come up with.


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## Cantaloupine (Dec 13, 2019)

I hope I'm not the only one without an assignment


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## Incognito Mood (Dec 14, 2019)

Why did I not see this thread until just now?
Oh well, I guess I won't be participating in the secret santa this year since it's too late to sign up.


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## José Mourinho (Dec 16, 2019)

If any of you still hasn't received the assignment PMs, *please let me know!*


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## Monika H. (Dec 17, 2019)

José Mourinho said:


> If any of you still hasn't received the assignment PMs, *please let me know!*


I actually have a unrelated question.
Are multiple gifts acceptable? Like art + story + (maybe) music?


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## José Mourinho (Dec 17, 2019)

Monika H. said:


> I actually have a unrelated question.
> Are multiple gifts acceptable? Like art + story + (maybe) music?


Of course!


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## MysteriousStranger (Dec 18, 2019)

Ugh. I've only just been reminded we do this. If you need an emergency Xmas Spirit Bot 9000, hit me up.


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## Jaded Optimist (Dec 23, 2019)

Anyone who is involved, please share the gift you got.  It's nice to see no matter how shitty.


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## Haramburger (Dec 24, 2019)

Better be active today/tomorrow helpers, I sent my shit in on time!


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## (((Oban Lazcano Kamz))) (Dec 24, 2019)

merry christmas everybody!


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## Deadwaste (Dec 24, 2019)

i literally forgot all about this 

oh well, next year i guess


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## Zaryiu (Dec 24, 2019)

No one told me about this, this year


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## Chan Fan (Dec 25, 2019)

Can we show off the gifts we got in this thread?  I wanna show off what my Secret Santa made for me, it's wonderful


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## Pope Negro Joe the XIIIth (Dec 25, 2019)

Chan Fan said:


> Can we show off the gifts we got in this thread?  I wanna show off what my Secret Santa made for me, it's wonderful



Isn't that what we did last year, or did we have a separate thread? I can't remember right now lol.

ETA: nevermind 

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/secret-santa-2019-gifts.64423/ @Chan Fan


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## José Mourinho (Dec 25, 2019)

Just fyi I've sent most of the gifts I've got. Waiting for 3 more.

Gifts will be in the thread in above post.


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## PumpkinSpiceBitchMeringue (Dec 25, 2019)

Is there someone involved in the Secret Santa that can give me a hand? PM me please!


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## Vlinny-kun (Dec 25, 2019)

I didn't know this was a thing goddamnit!


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## UnKillShredDur (Dec 26, 2019)

I was a little worried when I got my assignment, but I had a lot of fun making my gift. If you're reading this next year, or even further ahead than that, you should totally sign up for the SS squad (there's no way that term could be misunderstood).


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## José Mourinho (Dec 26, 2019)

Vlinny Chan said:


> I didn't know this was a thing goddamnit!


It not being noticed on the frontpage honestly was a major reason why it didn't get much participants either.


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## diana (Dec 26, 2019)

José Mourinho said:


> It not being noticed on the frontpage honestly was a major reason why it didn't get much participants either.


Wonder why that was


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## Rotogravure (Dec 26, 2019)

This was my first year.  And while I'm still experiencing anxiety that my recipient has neither posting asking WHERE MY GIFT or the actual gift -- I enjoyed myself IMMENSELY.   

I love giving people things that may make them smile. Because I am a huge nerdo.


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## Cake Farts (Dec 27, 2019)

Oh god oh fuck I missed it but happy holidays you kiwis


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## Dolphin Lundgren (Dec 27, 2019)

Oh man. Maybe I have bad Secret Santa luck.


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## UnKillShredDur (Dec 27, 2019)

Rotogravure said:


> I love giving people things that may make them smile. Because I am a huge nerdo.


I can totally relate to this


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## Rick Pratt (Dec 27, 2019)

I know my username is on the participant list, but I dropped out of the Secret Santa thing


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## Autisimodo (Dec 28, 2019)

The fact I still don't have my gift yet hasn't stopped me from having fun participating in the Secret Santa.

I just hope we all get our gifts soon enough, better late then never.


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Jan 1, 2020)

Autisimodo said:


> The fact I still don't have my gift yet hasn't stopped me from having fun participating in the Secret Santa.
> 
> I just hope we all get our gifts soon enough, better late then never.


I'll look into it.


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## Monika H. (Jan 1, 2020)

I got this beautiful and cute image from @Sundae.
Thank you mein Freund, it really warmed my heart!


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## NOT Sword Fighter Super (Apr 9, 2020)

Uhhhhh...why is this still pinned?
lol


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## Y2K Baby (Apr 9, 2020)

NOT Sword Fighter Super said:


> Uhhhhh...why is this still pinned?
> lol


It's important.


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## (((Oban Lazcano Kamz))) (Jun 16, 2020)

@José Mourinho @ProgKing of the North is back and is ducking my questions.


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## José Mourinho (Jun 17, 2020)

Oban Kamz said:


> @José Mourinho @ProgKing of the North is back and is ducking my questions.


He had some stuff going on IRL. Prog would explain it better than I do.


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