# Kiwi High: The Thread



## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

Let's see...this year it looks like my class schedule is going to be

Period 1: Anarchy 101 with Professor Andrews
Period 2: Law with Professor Chandler
Period 3: Physical Ed with Coach Connors

Lunch Break with Fatman 

Period 4: Caving with Professor Stiles
Period 5: Sex Ed with Professor F.Schmidt (with teacher intern Marjan)
Period 6: Geek Squad Certified PC Repair with Professor Geis

Who else is looking forward to their year at Kiwi High?
Any teachers, clubs, students, rivals, or drama you've heard of?


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## hm yeah (Jan 9, 2015)

on the last day of my high school finals, a girl brought in a water bottle that was actually full of vodka.

wise girl.


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## Rio (Jan 9, 2015)

Personally I'm really looking forward to economics with Darksydephil, but I'm not sure about music with professor Chris Chandler

Of course I'd like to try out for cheerleaders, but prof. Jace Connors is having none of it. He keeps insisting that it's gay and then throwing up.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

I am afraid of Waifu and her Tunnel Snakes gang.


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## hm yeah (Jan 9, 2015)

chris chandler should be the principal


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## EI 903 (Jan 9, 2015)

Psh, all the upper-class rich kids go to COW University across town.


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## Cubanodun (Jan 9, 2015)

i only want to bully people to hide my insecurities


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## hm yeah (Jan 9, 2015)

wogglebuglover should teach philosophy or english literature or something


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

I've heard that Professor Andrews is also teaching English, so that should be a highlight.


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

So I heard Dr./Coach Conners is also teaching Government. Is this true?


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## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

Now taking applications for the clique of bitchy pretty girls who all secretly hate one another. I always wanted to be in that group.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Fatman is the coolest kid on campus.


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## Conrix (Jan 9, 2015)

I'd be the introverted, somewhat angsty sperg who plays JRPGs and shooters, as well as having mostly decent grades.


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## TL 611 (Jan 9, 2015)

Yo any of you guys wanna buy some weed


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## hm yeah (Jan 9, 2015)

pixyteri should teach home econ


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Weeeeeeeeeell this year Dun and I are gonna try to run for Homecoming King and Queen so you guys all better watch out!


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## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

I'm not sure about our new Home EC teacher... 


Spoiler: NSFLife











[EDIT: hm yeah beat me to the punch. Great minds think alike!]


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## WonkeyDong (Jan 9, 2015)

Phoenix wright as the law teacher,cause why the hell not


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

Don't forget mathematics and statistics with Brad Watson. I heard he's somehow related to Einstein.

Quick question: Does the school have a pool so that Prof. Chandler can have wet and wild times with some of the students?


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## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> I'm not sure about our new Home EC teacher...
> 
> 
> Spoiler: NSFLife
> ...



She can teach us how to remove menstrual blood stains from a pair of nylon undies!


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## Smutley (Jan 9, 2015)

AIDS is the silent killer, I sure hope all kiwibros are wearing their rubbers.  #SexEd


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Oh boy, I think Home Ec is on my schedule. I know she is also teaching Japanese too and I'm also taking that. This is sure gonna be interesting...


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## Blueberry (Jan 9, 2015)

I heard that Catparty hangs around the football field drinking beer, because although he gets older, _the girls always stay the same._


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## hm yeah (Jan 9, 2015)

computer programming by that templeos or sparrowos guy
culinary arts by masaokis


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## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

Dean Ween said:


> I heard that Catparty hangs around the football field drinking beer, because although he gets older, _the girls always stay the same._


 ahem?


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## Da Pickle Monsta (Jan 9, 2015)

I'm taking Biology101 with Mr. JustinRPG.  We're going to be discussing the unbirthing process.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> I'm not sure about our new Home EC teacher...
> 
> 
> Spoiler: NSFLife




 
Jesus Christ no.


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## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

Oh crap, I've got Brad Watson for Algebra II.


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## TL 611 (Jan 9, 2015)

https://kiwifarms.net/styles/uix_dark/xenforo/avatars/avatar_s.png 2 minutes agoA Random: 
Oh! There should be a wrestling club.
https://kiwifarms.net/styles/uix_dark/xenforo/avatars/avatar_s.png 2 minutes agoA Random: 
Or class.






 I'm THE ULTIMAATE WARRIOR

I miss Hal


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

I thought that Pixy would be the girl that wears the sortest skirts in school. Professor Kaitlyn would teach Home Ec.


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## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

WonkeyDong said:


> Phoenix wright as the law teacher,cause why the hell not


That's not how you pronounce _"Marvey Blaziken!"_ I can see why you have trouble pronouncing it, seeing as he's the new foreign teacher who transferred here from Hoenn High.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Melchett said:


> https://kiwifarms.net/styles/uix_dark/xenforo/avatars/avatar_s.png 2 minutes agoA Random:
> Oh! There should be a wrestling club.
> https://kiwifarms.net/styles/uix_dark/xenforo/avatars/avatar_s.png 2 minutes agoA Random:
> Or class.
> ...


Everyone misses Hal.


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## kagayaki (Jan 9, 2015)

Kiwi High has a Weeaboo club. Its members usually spend off-class hours downloading "hard-core" anime and manga, hollering "kawaii sugoi desu" in the corridors and the cafeteria, and trying to glomp fellow classmates.

Also, will there be room for Equestriology, too?


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## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> I'm not sure about our new Home EC teacher...
> 
> 
> Spoiler: NSFLife
> ...


This is why I skip that class and get high with the other band geeks.


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## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

I heard that Principal Null had to expel Homer last semester for sexual harassment


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## A Random (Jan 9, 2015)

Swim class is already filled up.

All girls but one guy.

GET TO IT


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

And of course the campus security guards will be Eli and Tyce.


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## Blueberry (Jan 9, 2015)

Darksydephil can be the janitor who brings students into his closet and gives them advice on love


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Just to check, it is Professor Dobson that teaches women's studies, right?


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Poor Foulmouth got expelled for punching Coach Stryker..


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## WonkeyDong (Jan 9, 2015)

Dean Ween said:


> Darksydephil can be the janitor who brings students into his closet and gives them advice on love


i think he should be the chess club leader, marjan should be the janitor, telling you to rape everyone


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## Rio (Jan 9, 2015)

Glaive said:


> I heard that Principal Null had to expel Homer last semester for sexual harassment


That's okay. I was kinda weirded out by the way he'd stand in the hallways just yelling insults at the wall vaguely addressed to people he didn't name...


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## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

LegoTugboat said:


> I thought that Pixy would be the girl that wears the sortest skirts in school. Professor Kaitlyn would teach Home Ec.


You're right. Wasn't Pixy an ALT (Assistant Language Teacher) in real life at one point? PT should teach Japanese so one day I can have a Japanese husbando too!


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## Dollars2010 (Jan 9, 2015)

https://sneed-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/6c/1d/d6/6c1dd645b026383722e96ab6766c3ab4.jpg

Looks like I'm late for the class meeting...again.


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## Oglooger (Jan 9, 2015)

I can't wait to graduate out of this place.
anyways, if you want some free games, movies or some redpilling, you know where to find me


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## TL 611 (Jan 9, 2015)

Woody got expelled for exposing his ween to us all in class


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Melchett said:


> Woody got expelled for exposing his ween to us all in class



Woody got the axe.


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## EI 903 (Jan 9, 2015)

Prof. Chandler is supposedly focusing an entire semester of his art class on arms. Seems strange, but the school is just lucky to have such a famous artist on staff.



Spoiler


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## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

Dean Ween said:


> Darksydephil can be the janitor who brings students into his closet and gives them advice on love



I heard our janitor does it for free


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

I like to hang out with the nerds that play their 3DS's and whatever at lunch and after school

Is it confirmed that Mr. Cracker is gonna be the film and drama teacher?

I think Kai is gonna be the the Chemithry teacher and show us how to attain the thuperest shade of radiant orchid. Unless her teaching assignment changed this semester


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## Ariel (Jan 9, 2015)

CoolDudeClem takes Engineering 

Who wants to sit on the far side of the oval at lunch and smoke? We can see the teachers coming to bust us if we sit there. 

Also did you guys hear that Woodychan and Peppy hooked up at the party on the weekend? How gross is that?!?!? Im like going to vomit.


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## WonkeyDong (Jan 9, 2015)

Oglooger said:


> I can't wait to graduate out of this place.
> anyways, if you want some free games, movies or some redpilling, you know where to find me


is it my fault your not popular?


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## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

Hunger Mythos said:


> https://sneed-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/6c/1d/d6/6c1dd645b026383722e96ab6766c3ab4.jpg
> 
> Looks like I'm late for the class meeting...again.



Gurrrrrl you better get to cheer practice


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

Hellblazer said:


> Prof. Chandler is supposedly focusing an entire semester of his art class on arms. Seems strange, but the school is just lucky to have such a famous artist on staff.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I also heard he's offering to sell his mothers car to students.... and that he walks through the halls with a heart on a string?


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

chimpchan said:


> Also did you guys hear that Woodychan and Peppy hooked up at the party on the weekend? How gross is that?!?!? Im like going to vomit.


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## WonkeyDong (Jan 9, 2015)

Glaive said:


> I heard our janitor does it for free








 this is the true form of payment for a janitor


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

The school would naturally have animals. I believe it's a combination of ponies, hedgehogs, kiwi birds and the occasional corgi.


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## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> I also heard he's offering to sell his mothers car to students.... and that he walks through the halls with a heart on a string?



He's probably doing some kind of performance art. That man is a gift.


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## TL 611 (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> I also heard he's offering to sell his mothers car to students.... and that he walks through the halls with a heart on a string?


One time Prof Chandler threw a rock at me with a picture of an Electric Hedgehog Pokemon tied around it


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

I hear professor Vade will be teaching human sexuality. Fucking stoked.


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## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> I like to hang out with the nerds that play their 3DS's and whatever at lunch and after school
> 
> Is it confirmed that Mr. Cracker is gonna be the film and drama teacher?
> 
> I think Kai is gonna be the the Chemithry teacher and show us how to attain the thuperest shade of radiant orchid. Unless her teaching assignment changed this semester


No. Kai teaches Color Theory class for advanced art students. Next semester I'll learn how red is a red typa color that looks stuneen and she lauves it!


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## Dollars2010 (Jan 9, 2015)

The Knife said:


> Gurrrrrl you better get to cheer practice


I got kicked off the squad because they said my stump flailing lacked spirit. 
So I took up acting:


Spoiler


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## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

Guys, I needs help in Barb's history class. I can't recognize famous landmarks in the hoard!


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## Rio (Jan 9, 2015)

Would anyone like to join my extracurricular  fashion and design club? I can't offer marks, but I can offer friendship and potentially hugs! I received express permission from professor pixyteri, so it's all set up


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## RetardBus (Jan 9, 2015)

Fuck, I got up late, I knew I tripped out too hard on caffeine last night. I'm late for class now. I need to drive to school and get started on hurting other people.


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## EI 903 (Jan 9, 2015)

This district has really gone downhill since Superintendent Brook retired.


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> No. Kai teaches Color Theory class for advanced art students. Next semester I'll learn how red is a red typa color that looks stuneen and she lauves it!



Maybe I too can get a makeup certification like her...


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## Cubanodun (Jan 9, 2015)

Rio said:


> Would anyone like to join my extracurricular  fashion and design club? I can't offer marks, but I can offer friendship and potentially hugs!



>hugs

where i sign?


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Scandalous pics of Hunger from the last party.


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## kagayaki (Jan 9, 2015)

A Random said:


> Swim class is already filled up.
> 
> All girls but one guy.
> 
> GET TO IT



Does Coach Jace also teach swimming? I hope I survive his bonus underwater parkour lesson.


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## Ariel (Jan 9, 2015)

Guys lets wag school (cut class) on friday and go into the city. Next year we need doctors certificates or it will affect our marks. So we neeeeed to wag as much as possible this year!!!!


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

I heard A-Log is a student teacher? Is that true?


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Hellblazer said:


> This district has really gone downhill since Superintendent Brook retired.


He was strong armed into it.


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## RetardBus (Jan 9, 2015)

Rio said:


> Would anyone like to join my extracurricular  fashion and design club? I can't offer marks, but I can offer friendship and potentially hugs! I received express permission from professor pixyteri, so it's all set up


Only if I get to wear all of the fancy suits and nice leather jackets. Only fitting for the local Mafia bo- I mean legitimate businessman.


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## Dollars2010 (Jan 9, 2015)

exball said:


> Scandalous pics of Hunger from the last party.


You promised you wouldn't share that photo! That's it. I'm going to get my biker gang together and we're going to take you out, nerd. Give us your lunch money!


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Join the Tabletop RPG club please? Not that it matters... though every Friday there is a pokemon tournament at lunch.


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## A Random (Jan 9, 2015)

kagayaki said:


> Does Coach Jace also teach swimming? I hope I survive his bonus underwater parkour lesson.


Only on weekends.

Weekdays, you learn from the best swimmer in the forums!


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

I wonder if we can get Commander Stryker to teach Agriculture.

I'd ask for self-defense, but I've heard that Professor Chandler is taking that class. He's so talented.


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## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

Professor TJ is teaching advanced lit this year! I am going to skip and buy some weed from Kyle!


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Prof. Chandler dropped some sick beats last year.


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## Ariel (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> I heard A-Log is a student teacher? Is that true?


Yeah, he is so lame! We laugh at him and he doesn't even know!


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

LegoTugboat said:


> I wonder if we can get Commander Stryker to teach Agriculture.
> 
> I'd ask for self-defense, but I've heard that Professor Chandler is taking that class. He's so talented.


I took Professor Chandler's class last year and all I learned was to spray myself as well if i was threatened.


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## cypocraphy (Jan 9, 2015)




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## Pine Tar (Jan 9, 2015)

I'm the football coach. The fucking Cowboys better not go winless again or I'm fired.


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## KingofManga420 (Jan 9, 2015)

I hear really bipolar things about Proffessor Wu's Gender Studies class...


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Coolest teachers in the district.


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## EI 903 (Jan 9, 2015)

LegoTugboat said:


> I've heard that Professor Andrews is also teaching English, so that should be a highlight.



He had to drop the course at the last minute, so Prof. Tesch took it over. I don't mind the view when she's up there writing on the chalkboard, but I found fifteen typos on the first page of the syllabus so I'm a bit worried about my education.


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## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

exball said:


> Prof. Chandler dropped some sick beats last year.


His African studies class is awesome!!! 
Btw, tomorrow at lunch I'm going to break onto the intercom and tell people I'm bat man. Prankmaster.


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## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

I just hope Professor Church hires someone to start proofreading his worksheets. Does the Whig Party even still exist?


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## RP 520 (Jan 9, 2015)

Does anyone else find the school councilor, Alyssa Vade, kind of weird and bitchy?


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## A Random (Jan 9, 2015)

Pine Tar said:


> I'm the football coach. The fucking Cowboys better not go winless again or I'm fired.


What's the full name of the team again? Last I heard they were the Virginia Sonichu Cowboy Wogglebugs.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

The Janitor Mr. Mays is the wisest guy on campus.


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## Coster (Jan 9, 2015)

Anybody see that weird lady working front desk next to Principal Null's office? I think her name was Ms. Katsu...

Join the pun club! We go to region wide tournaments, where we _pun_ish the competition!


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

So there was this one guy who claims to be a student but looks way to old.


 
Anyone know anything about this guy? He seems kinda creepy.


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## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

Hellblazer said:


> He had to drop the course at the last minute, so Prof. Tesch took it over. I don't mind the view when she's up there writing on the chalkboard, but I found fifteen typos on the first page of the syllabus so I'm a bit worried about my education.


How dare you!! Professor Tesch is a published writer!!


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## kagayaki (Jan 9, 2015)

A Random said:


> Only on weekends.
> 
> Weekdays, you learn from the best swimmer in the forums!


A former team captain of the Sea Corgis, perhaps who is now a teacher here?


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

exball said:


> The Janitor Mr. Mays is the wisest guy on campus.


He's actually the Principle. They're just keeping it on the hushhush


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> He's actually the Principle. They're just keeping it on the hushhush


Principle Null is Principle for life. There are no elections.


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

OH MY GOSH! I had Bob for Forestry one year... it was quite amazing. One day when we were all caught up, he taught us how to make a plastic funnel


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## A Random (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> He's actually the Principle. They're just keeping it on the hushhush


He does this so he can be closer to the students.

So does Mr. Anderson.


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> He's actually the Principle. They're just keeping it on the hushhush



All I know is that there was an incident before between Professor Chandler and the mascot of the other high school. Think it was pickle or some such.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> OH MY GOSH! I had Bob for Forestry one year... it was quite amazing. One day when we were all caught up, he taught us how to make a plastic funnel


R.I.P Mr. Chandler.


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## Ariel (Jan 9, 2015)

EleSigma said:


> Does anyone else find the school councilor, Alyssa Vade, kind of weird and bitchy?


I asked her for advice last term, she said some weird things. I told Laura D, who told her mum, who told mine and my mum went to our home room teacher about it and like Miss Vade might be getting suspended now! LOLLLLL


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

So has the school decided on a mascot? I heard it was narrowed down to some pink pony and a yellow thing called "Sonachu" or something like that?


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## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

I wanted Miss Vade for Gender Studies, but she said it wasn't her job to teach me.


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## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

A Random said:


> What's the full name of the team again? Last I heard they were the Virginia Sonichu Cowboy Wogglebugs.


We are gonna make state this year! 
When we win I'm gonna have a huge sleepover and invite all the girl and MALE lesbians NO JERKS.


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## Overcast (Jan 9, 2015)

I hope Glaive-San notices me...



Dammit! Holden-Sensei is teaching sex ed! What a nightmare!


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## Obnoxion (Jan 9, 2015)

How does it feel having all those chads around to ruin your fun? Sucks to be you, dweebs.

COW Uni represent!


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## Trickie (Jan 9, 2015)

I can be the AP Art teacher who's half deranged and pretty much stoned all the time. I'll go on and on about "expressing your inner self's self" and stuff like that, making up new age-ey sounding explanations for my student's works, like "Oh, yes! Such a powerful piece, showing the oppressive power of the self that society presses upon us all!" "Ms. Trickie, it's a painting of a potato."


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Trickie said:


> I can be the AP Art teacher who's half deranged and pretty much stoned all the time. I'll go on and on about "expressing your inner self's self" and stuff like that, making up new age-ey sounding explanations for my student's works, like "Oh, yes! Such a powerful piece, showing the oppressive power of the self that society presses upon us all!" "Ms. Trickie, it's a painting of a potato."


Can? You make it sound like it's fake. Go home miss, you're drunk.


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

I've taken math with Prof. Watson but he keeps telling me my grade is an F even though I answer everything correct, and then he tells me I can take the class again in 666 days.


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## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

Coster said:


> Anybody see that weird lady working front desk next to Principal Null's office? I think her name was Ms. Katsu...
> 
> Join the pun club! We go to region wide tournaments, where we _pun_ish the competition!


The pun club is for fags! The parkour club is fucking tight.


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## EI 903 (Jan 9, 2015)

Trickie said:


> I can be the AP Art teacher who's half deranged and pretty much stoned all the time. I'll go on and on about "expressing your inner self's self" and stuff like that, making up new age-ey sounding explanations for my student's works, like "Oh, yes! Such a powerful piece, showing the oppressive power of the self that society presses upon us all!" "Ms. Trickie, it's a painting of a potato."



How did I do on my mixed-media midterm? I call it "The Ennui of Persistence (exhilation)"



Spoiler


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## RetardBus (Jan 9, 2015)

No matter what I submit in Professor Church's English class, he tells me I'm too stupid to count to E and that even his niece could write a better book report.


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## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??

Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited
ETA: @applecat @Philly Cheese Steak @silentprincess
EETA: @Trickie @Christ-Chan


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

One of the Goth kids Strato hit me with a shopping cart.


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## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

LegoTugboat said:


> All I know is that there was an incident before between Professor Chandler and the mascot of the other high school. Think it was pickle or some such.


Yeah, the PVCC PickleMen's mascot. That's why he's no longer allowed to attend sporting events.


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## Objection! (Jan 9, 2015)

We're gonna stay up alllllllllll night and do bad girl things, like painting fingernails, having pillow fights and NOT SLEEPING.  REBELLIOUS TO THE EXTREME!

Get some tea and crumpets, dis gon be good.


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## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @CatParty @CatParty @CatParty @CatParty @CatParty @CatParty @CatParty are all invited


Fixed.


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## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited



Slumber party eh?


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

I have to say, I'm glad the school's been repaired after the Keurig caught fire.


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## kagayaki (Jan 9, 2015)

The cafeteria serves Orange Fanta (goes down salty), Mountain Dew (especially Code Red), Doritos, Cheez-Its, pizza, and hamburgers on a daily basis along with the usual lunch fare. Pickles absolutely not included.


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## Rio (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited


I was trying to make a fashionable girl clique, those tend to be popular, but it's failing.  Also, I'm totes coming to the slumber party!


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## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

Vade's Gender Politics class, please.


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## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

kagayaki said:


> The cafeteria serves Orange Fanta (goes down salty), Mountain Dew (especially Code Red), Doritos, Cheez-Its, pizza, and hamburgers on a daily basis along with the usual lunch fare. Pickles absolutely not included.



There's also cheese steak and kiwifruit. Plus doggy biscuits for the mascot, even though they're disappearing faster then usual.


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## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited



Well, there are the nerds with their gameboys and stuff...

Of course I would love to go, all the cool people! 

But ummmmmmm... are you sure I won't regret this?


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## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited
> ETA: @applecat @Philly Cheese Steak @silentprincess


If I bring a bottle of good booze can I come? I'm great at parties. Here's a pic from my last one.


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Well, there are the nerds with their gameboys and stuff...
> 
> Of course I would love to go, all the cool people!
> 
> But ummmmmmm... are you sure I won't regret this?


c'mon...you can trust lil ol me...


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> Vade's Gender Politics class, please.


----------



## Smutley (Jan 9, 2015)

I got signed up from Professor Wu's intro to Computer Science class


----------



## Gorse (Jan 9, 2015)

Mr./Mrs. Wu gave me a "D" on my liberal arts paper! I tried to clarify what I did wrong, but she/he said I was a bigot.

EDIT: FUCKING SMUTLEY


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

I'll join the feels club with @Glaive.


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Gorse said:


> Mr./Mrs. Wu gave me a "D" on my liberal arts paper! I tried to clarify what I did wrong, but she/he said I was a bigot.



Did she ask you to mansplain?


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

After school, I have a hot date with a luscious-lipped redhead.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

Lol, at the school dance I'm gonna spike the punch bowl with vodka and bring some pot brownies. I heard that christian and the hedgehog boys are gonna rock.


----------



## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> After school, I have a hot date with a luscious-lipped redhead.


----------



## RetardBus (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited
> ETA: @applecat @Philly Cheese Steak @silentprincess
> EETA: @Trickie @Christ-Chan


Just to warn you guys, I might get high on caffeine the night this is happening and crash my car loaded up with 2 liter bottles of Pepsi Max, pizza, and cannolis into the house. Feel free to raid the car if this happens, but beware, the pizza might attract a big nasty grilla.


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

RetardBus said:


> Feel free to raid the car if this happens, but beware, the pizza might attract a big nasty grilla.


Keep his stinkin paws off my pizza, damn dirty ape.


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

RetardBus said:


> Just to warn you guys, I might get high on caffeine the night this happening and crash my car loaded up with 2 liter bottles of Pepsi Max, pizza, and cannolis into the house. Feel free to raid the car if this happens, but beware, the pizza might attract a big nasty grilla.


NO MALES ALLOWED


----------



## Male (Jan 9, 2015)

What kind of autistic  pathetic loser talks about reliving high school?
What are you, Chris?


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

RetardBus said:


> Just to warn you guys, I might get high on caffeine while this is happening and crash my car loaded up with 2 liter bottles of Pepsi Max, pizza, and cannolis into the house. Feel free to raid the car if this happens, but beware, the pizza might attract a big nasty grilla.


----------



## Trickie (Jan 9, 2015)

Hellblazer said:


> How did I do on my mixed-media midterm? I call it "The Ennui of Persistence (exhilation)"
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Your piece moved me to tears. The man in back is clearly the focus of the piece, and there's a deep pain in that man's eyes, a pain that goes far into his soul, but he doesn't want to show it. No, he keeps his two buttchin-faced loved ones close (they have butt-chin faces because they are of one mind with him, of one spirit, taking on his most prominent feature for themselves with no regard for their own individuality), clutching them as he does life, for they're all he has in this cruel, oppressive world. 

A+


----------



## Dollars2010 (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited
> ETA: @applecat @Philly Cheese Steak @silentprincess
> EETA: @Trickie @Christ-Chan


Best party ever!


Spoiler


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Male said:


> What kind of autistic  pathetic loser talks about reliving high school?
> What are you, Chris?


Grilla plz go.


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

I go into the boy's bathroom, and a tall, Hulk-like jock is having trouble rolling his penis into his pants.

Yes, he's black.


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> I go into the boy's bathroom, and a tall, Hulk-like jock is having trouble rolling his penis into his pants.
> 
> Yes, he's black.


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

Male said:


> What kind of autistic  pathetic loser talks about reliving high school?
> What are you, Chris?


Listen bully, me and @Hunger Mythos  are the hall monitors around here. We've been informed that you need to be escorted out. This is a Grape Ape free zone


----------



## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

exball said:


> I'll join the feels club with @Glaive.



The Lonely Hearts Club 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	









Got a new recruitment poster with our mascot on it and everything 
Please join.


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

I wonder who I'll be paired with for _Date Ed..._


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 9, 2015)

If we're all pretending we're high school kids then I'm in!

I'll just go climb on top of the lockers, on my own accord, without any bully to help.


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

So, I get past the black kid and make my way to a stall, only to slip on someone's semen and slam my head into the shit-filled toilet.


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

Date Ed will be taught by Professor Dobson this year.


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> So, I get past the black kid and make my way to a stall, only to slip on someone's semen and slam my head into the shit-filled toilet.



Stop doing jenkem.


----------



## RetardBus (Jan 9, 2015)

@Connor you left your Molly Ringwald love doll in the gym showers. Go there, pick it up, walk outside, and then tell everyone what you've done to her bellybutton or else you're sleeping with the fishes.


----------



## Coster (Jan 9, 2015)

exball said:


> Date Ed will be taught by Professor Dobson this year.



I heard he's the sponsor for the anime club? I saw his name listed as the sponsor but it confused me because I thought he hated anime.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 9, 2015)

I got my Pokemon comics in my backpack for during recess.

Ha, ha. Very funny, so they talk about "Balls" a lot.


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

RetardBus said:


> you left your Molly Ringwald love doll in the gym showers. Pick it up, walk outside, and then tell everyone what you've done to her bellybutton or else you're sleeping with the fishes.


I came in it, shat in it, oiled it up, bit into it and fucked it until it bled.


----------



## Trickie (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited
> ETA: @applecat @Philly Cheese Steak @silentprincess
> EETA: @Trickie @Christ-Chan



I'm supposed to be a teacher though. I mean, I'm stoned all the time, so I'm a "cool" teacher, but still. (I don't even know what EETA is supposed to mean)


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

I need something help from home economy class with Pixy! She said that to pass I need to make a kawaii bento for my husbando and if I fail my hitch mom will not let me go to the big dance!!!!!


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> I came in it, shat in it, oiled it up, bit into it and fucked it until it bled.



Axolotl Counsellor says you should get psychiatric assistance.

I'm Axolotl Counsellor.


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> I came in it, shat in it, oiled it up, bit into it and fucked it until it bled.



Hey dumbass! I'm making @Glaive the new quarterback. Pick up your sex doll and go home!


----------



## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

Glaive said:


> The Lonely Hearts Club
> 
> 
> 
> ...


We band geeks support this endeavor.


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counsellor says you should get psychiatric assistance.
> 
> I'm Axolotl Counsellor.


And that's my cue to walk around the school naked.


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> And that's my cue to walk around the school naked.



Axolotl Counsellor sees no problem in such actions being taken.


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> And that's my cue to walk around the school naked.



And that's why you shouldn't mainstream autists.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Okay! I'll go! Just warn you I might be a little late due to gaming club and a tournament there. This better not tarnish my chances of becoming homecoming queen, you hear?


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

LegoTugboat said:


> And that's why you shouldn't mainstream autists.


Shoot the fucking retards.


----------



## The Knife (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Okay! I'll go! Just warn you I might be a little late due to gaming club and a tournament there. This better not tarnish my chances of becoming homecoming queen, you hear?



I'm campaigning for you, Fia! In it to win it, lol! Love ya, gurl!

_*prepares bucket of pig's blood*_


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> Shoot the fucking retards.



Axolotl Counselor would like to remind you that retards are an endangered species in Kiwi High and should be treated with the utmost care by feeding them all your junk food and hoping they go extinct.


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Okay! I'll go! Just warn you I might be a little late due to gaming club and a tournament there. This better not tarnish my chances of becoming homecoming queen, you hear?


Nooooooooo, it's all trill, yo?
*plans to booze up fialovy and take awful pics to better her and CatParty's chances at the homecoming crowns*


----------



## Hawker Hurricane (Jan 9, 2015)

Sweet! I got the last spot in Skunk-Catching 101 with Professor Scudworth!


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> And that's my cue to walk around the school naked.


It's... _smaller_ than I expected. :/ Are you okay?


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Nooooooooo, it's all trill, yo?
> *plans to booze up fialovy and take awful pics to better her and CatParty's chances at the homecoming crowns*



So, Professor Connors is single? Interesting, I wonder if I can pair him with Counsellor Vade.


----------



## Connor Bible (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> feeding them all your junk food and hoping they go extinct.


The only thing they should be fed is bullets.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counselor would like to remind you that retards are an endangered species in Kiwi High and should be treated with the utmost care by feeding them all your junk food and hoping they go extinct.


you are probably the most patient counselor ever, you taking interns in the near future?


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> you are probably the most patient counselor ever, you taking interns in the near future?



Axolotl Counsellor is currently taking applications. Please fill one out in triplicate and wait 4 to 6 weeks to be told you filled them out incorrectly.


----------



## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

Does anyone know what Professor Wu's degree is in? We're supposed to be learning about modern feminism but she just keeps shrieking that we're persecuting her and we should give her money.


----------



## Ariel (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Pffft. Six pages in and no cliques have been established? Do you guys even highschool??
> 
> Also, slumber party at my place tonight. @CatParty is old enough to buy us booze. @Melchett @Fialovy @chimpchan @Melchett @Objection! @Waifu @The Knife @littlebiscuits @Hunger Mythos @KatsuKitty @Rio    are all invited
> ETA: @applecat @Philly Cheese Steak @silentprincess
> EETA: @Trickie @Christ-Chan


Will your dad drive us to Blockbuster so we can spend an hour choosing movies?


----------



## exball (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> endangered species


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Nooooooooo, it's all trill, yo?
> *plans to booze up fialovy and take awful pics to better her and CatParty's chances at the homecoming crowns*



Why are you looking at me all funny?



			
				chimpchan said:
			
		

> Will your dad drive us to Blockbuster so we can spend an hour choosing movies?



BLOCKBUSTER IS DEAD


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

So I heard Coach Jace was teaching Sex Ed but when he had to teach the male portion he had a panic attack. Is this true?


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 9, 2015)

chimpchan said:


> Will your dad drive us to Blockbuster so we can spend an hour choosing movies?


IDK, I'll have to call him (for real)


----------



## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> So I heard Coach Jace was teaching Sex Ed but when he had to teach the male portion he had a panic attack. Is this true?


Ugh I was in that class. Dewrito vomit everywhere.


----------



## Ariel (Jan 9, 2015)

_@chimpchan pulls the latest issue of Cosmopolitan out of her school bag 

_


----------



## Smutley (Jan 9, 2015)

PurpleMonkeyDishwasher said:


> Does anyone know what Professor Wu's degree is in? We're supposed to be learning about modern feminism but she just keeps shrieking that we're persecuting her and we should give her money.



Well ACTUALLY she's Counselor Professor Doctor Principle Wu, shitlord.  Maybe if you didn't try and studentsplain what her role was you wouldn't get an F.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Okay! I'll go! Just warn you I might be a little late due to gaming club and a tournament there. This better not tarnish my chances of becoming homecoming queen, you hear?


Don't tell finally, but if she wins, I'm going to dunk a bucket of pigs blood on her head!!!


----------



## Rio (Jan 9, 2015)

JPetro said:


> So I heard Coach Jace was teaching Sex Ed but when he had to teach the male portion he had a panic attack. Is this true?


Yeah, that's why Fschmidt and intern Marjan were brought in. They're not technically employed at kiwi high I think. I'm pretty sure that they're outsourced from L.Shy high


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

Connor said:


> The only thing they should be fed is bullets.



Please observe the food trapezium:






As you can see, bullets are in the middle and therefore they are of the highest nutritional value for the retard population in Kiwi High. It is important to deny them of this nutrition.

I'm Axolotl Counsellor.


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Please observe the food trapezium:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You forgot Doritos which are fucking expensive.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

chimpchan said:


> _@chimpchan pulls the latest issue of Cosmopolitan out of her school bag
> _



_peeks over chimpchan's shoulder and turns bright red at the sex columns_


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

PurpleMonkeyDishwasher said:


> Does anyone know what Professor Wu's degree is in? We're supposed to be learning about modern feminism but she just keeps shrieking that we're persecuting her and we should give her money.


I challenged her to a drag race and she called school security on me...


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

The Knife said:


> Now taking applications for the clique of bitchy pretty girls who all secretly hate one another. I always wanted to be in that group.


Ooh! I'll be the one that nobody even pretends to like, and I'm only in the group to make the other girls look good by comparison.


----------



## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

Rio said:


> I'm pretty sure that they're outsourced from L.Shy high




Oh I think we are playing them in next week's game


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> Ooh! I'll be the one that nobody even pretends to like, and I'm only in the group to make the other girls look good by comparison.



Axolotl Counsellor says this will be very good for your self-esteem.


----------



## RP 520 (Jan 9, 2015)

Rumor has it @FramerGirl420 is trying to win the homecoming queen. Good luck to her since she'll have to beat @Hunger Mythos who holds it right now as well as all the other freakin' awards in the school.

Damn overachievers.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counsellor says this will be very good for your self-esteem.


I need to schedule a meeting. My dad says that he will beat me if I don't get into cwcville university next year...


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

The Joker said:


> I need to schedule a meeting. My dad says that he will beat me if I don't get into cwcville university next year...



No meeting necessary, Axolotl Counsellor says you better get into that damn university.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Glaive said:


> Oh I think we are playing them in next week's game



You transferred from there, right?


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> No meeting necessary, Axolotl Counsellor says you better get into that damn university.


Fuck you I'm gonna go backpacking in molvania!


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counsellor says this will be very good for your self-esteem.


You're the best, Axolotl Counselor! I'll always remember your friendly words of advice; _"Axolotl Counselor says find somebody who accepts you for who you are, unless they'd like something different. In that case, change."_


----------



## Abethedemon (Jan 9, 2015)

Guys, I hear that Mr. Kincaid stuffed a banana up his butt. Everyone still loves him though, I don't why.


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Fuck you I'm gonna go backpacking in molvania!



Axolotl Counselor would like to remind you to pack a dentist for your journey!



morganna said:


> You're the best, Axolotl Counselor! I'll always remember your friendly words of advice; _"Axolotl Counselor says find somebody who accepts you for who you are, unless they'd like something different. In that case, change."_



I'm axolotl counselor.


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Abethedemon said:


> Guys, I hear that Mr. Kincaid stuffed a banana up his butt. Everyone still loves him though, I don't why.



It depends on the type of banana.


----------



## RP 520 (Jan 9, 2015)

I heard Jace Conners was going to try and join the USMC after he graduates? Will they even take him with that eye problem he has?


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Don't tell finally, but if she wins, I'm going to dunk a bucket of pigs blood on her head!!!



okay... that will at least make me feel better? umm... I guess?


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> okay... that will at least make me feel better? umm... I guess?



Axolotl Counselor says revenge is the most satisfying way to regain one's dignity.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counselor says revenge is the most satisfying way to regain one's dignity.



well, you are a certified counselor sooooooooooooo okay!


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 9, 2015)

Alright, I'm making @Sanic the running back to compensate for our manlet quarterback's height. With him running the ball (and the fact he's my dealer), we'll not only avoid being winless, we'll have a shot at state!


----------



## Protoman (Jan 9, 2015)

Man, health with Mr. Bate is awful. There's always this... really weird smell that just fills up the room whenever he walks in. It's like a cross between a dumpster and a septic tank. Fucking gross.


----------



## Judge Holden (Jan 9, 2015)

Hello Children

And staff

I am Professor Holden

I am your new Sexual Education teacher

Im sure you are all curious as to why you have awoken naked and in chains in the boiler room, bound to chairs covered in razor blades, and why your bowels feel like they are about to burst

The answers to which shall be explained in today's lecture

"EX-LAX FLAY-RAPE: THE KEY TO ETERNAL YOUTH?"

In a moment, the bonds will be released, and I will need the left side of the boiler room to partner up with someone on the right side of the boiler room, those on the left side will find you have each been fitted with a rectal funnel which when clicked in to the o-ring gags fitted into the mouths of those on the right side, connects your digestive systems in perfect synthesis

after you have done so, assume the position and I shall come round to each pair to "complete" the circuit so to speak

anyone who fails to do so will see me after class to partake in a..... direct demonstration

once you are all prepared, i shall begin the incisions, and the lesson shall begin


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

Glaive is going to have to add a voting feature for homecoming court.
On another note... _"homecoming court?_" No. We can do better. Homekiwi court? Homecoming cwcrt? ... There's a joke in there _somewhere_, damn it!


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

_Is busy trying to organize the pep rally and win brownie points for homecoming queen_


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 9, 2015)

You know what the best about having Sanic as our runningback is? Aside from the awesome weed, it means I don't have to be the anime club's head anymore and watch that stupid show about some pervert Jap who likes to finger robots.


----------



## RP 520 (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> Glaive is going to have to add a voting feature for homecoming court.
> On another note... _"homecoming court?_" No. We can do better. Homekiwi court? Homecoming cwcrt? ... There's a joke in there _somewhere_, damn it!



You know what's going to happen if Applecat enters don't you?


----------



## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> Glaive is going to have to add a voting feature for homecoming court.
> On another note... _"homecoming court?_" No. We can do better. Homekiwi court? Homecoming cwcrt? ... There's a joke in there _somewhere_, damn it!


HomeKiweening? Don't worry, I'm ashamed of that one too.


----------



## Ronald Gaygun (Jan 9, 2015)

i wanna join the cheerleading team but only if i get to wear the girly outfit


----------



## Cute Anime Girl (Jan 9, 2015)

Ronald Gaygun said:


> i wanna join the cheerleading team but only if i get to wear the girly outfit


You're gonna get the swirly, FAG.


----------



## Glaive (Jan 9, 2015)

morganna said:


> On another note... _"homecoming court?_" No. We can do better. Homekiwi court? Homecoming cwcrt? ... There's a joke in there _somewhere_, damn it!



Supreme Ween Homecoming Team


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

Ronald Gaygun said:


> i wanna join the cheerleading team but only if i get to wear the girly outfit


Megagi's the cheer captain. You have to take it up with her.


----------



## Judge Holden (Jan 9, 2015)

You girls wanting to join the cheerleading squad are in luck. I sold the last team to fansadox comics to act as models for the redneck gangrape series, so a new team is needed. 

Better yet, in 2 months i will be personally taking the team on a trip to scenic missisippi where I have......business with some people very interested in making yall's acquaintance


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Pine Tar said:


> watch that stupid show about some pervert Jap who likes to finger robots.



That show makes no logical sense either...


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> That show makes no logical sense either...



It only starts making sense if you're high.  And then it doesn't make sense. Still, I'd rather be watch my team get their asses kicked by the L. Shy High Wizards then watch some gook cartoon again.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Judge Holden said:


> You girls wanting to join the cheerleading squad are in luck. I sold the last team to fansadox comics to act as models for the redneck gangrape series, so a new team is needed.
> 
> Better yet, in 2 months i will be personally taking the team on a trip to scenic missisippi where I have......business with some people very interested in making yall's acquaintance



Who made you cheerleading coach?


----------



## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Who made you cheerleading coach?


Whoever is wrapped up in that carpet in the boot of his car.


----------



## Judge Holden (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Who made you cheerleading coach?



Principal Nol did after I agreed to release the grade schoolers from my naked meth-and-prolapse lab


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Judge Holden said:


> Principal Nol did after I agreed to release the grade schoolers from my naked meth-and-prolapse lab



No comment...

And no comment on that person in the back of the car...


----------



## Judge Holden (Jan 9, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> No comment...
> 
> And no comment on that person in the back of the car...


Thats principal Nol, hes wrapped up with the least....used of the gradeschoolers and a bag of Holden-Farms artisanal bacon-flavored methamphetamines

Being my boss has its perks


----------



## morganna (Jan 9, 2015)

Why does Professor Holden's office smell like chloroform...?


----------



## Judge Holden (Jan 9, 2015)

Time to do what I always dreamed of.........but what even I never dared to do until now...

_*dresses morganna in a frilly dress and hat, and has a teaparty with her and his doll collection while she is unconcious_


----------



## applecat (Jan 9, 2015)

I've heard they passed a "no murring" policy this year.







I rate that optimistic.


----------



## Duke Nukem (Jan 9, 2015)

I'm the guy that is shunned by the other students, and spends his off time in the weight room or computer lab, depending on my mood.

Grades are decent but I don't play well with others.


----------



## Hunk (Jan 9, 2015)

... am I allowed to wear a gas mask in class?


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 9, 2015)

Hunk said:


> ... am I allowed to wear a gas mask in class?



Given that the teachers are Bates, Tyce and Chris, I think they're part of the school uniform.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 9, 2015)

I hacked into the school fundraiser and used the money to buy Skeletons! Pranked! I rucker your mom. Kill obeme


----------



## DH 384 (Jan 9, 2015)

Does anyone else have Professor Richard Cranium for music theory? It's a weird, weird class.

It started off great but now literally the only thing we listen to is Slayer and we get to listen to him make freudian slips all the time. He also brags way too much about the time he pretended to be Coach Connors. Kinda glad they got rid of the assistant phys ed teacher Tyce though, he always made the basketballs reek of jenkem.

This Sunday's gonna be awesome though. Our football game against the L.Shy High Wizards, the street racing Coach Connors is running before the game, and the party we're having afterwards. @Glaive and I are going to bring the beer and we've already got a bunch of people for it


----------



## Overcast (Jan 9, 2015)

So many people here...

I hope there's a library I can spend my free time at...


----------



## Cuck Norris (Jan 9, 2015)

scorptatious said:


> So many people here...
> 
> I hope there's a library I can spend my free time at...


We do, but the librarian spends most of her time sleeping. I think she's related to Professor Chandler but I'm not sure.


----------



## Smutley (Jan 9, 2015)

I imagine @DeagleDad420 is in the back of the parking lot, drinking a forty out of a paper bag with @FlyAwayNow and @WachtAmWeb, the three of them really annoyed they have to attend and deal with all this faggotry.


----------



## Abethedemon (Jan 9, 2015)

scorptatious said:


> So many people here...
> 
> I hope there's a library I can spend my free time at...


There is, we have a good archive of Sonichu, if you're into comics.


----------



## RetardBus (Jan 9, 2015)

I have to take off the rooster mask for prom.  I hope my fancy suit is enough to be able to look proper while I overload on caffeine and go on a wild ride.


----------



## Jake Morgendorffer (Jan 9, 2015)

i absolutely refuse to be a real person for any event whatsoever, also is there some higher up i can report coach stryker-connors to? he keeps on trying to sell me weed then accuses me of being a cigarette because i was the last one out the showers, wasn't mr. andrews demoted to a janitor earlier in march? and now he make jenkum in the boiler room? i can't handle being in this school for too long.. it's only a matter of time.. then you popular kids'll be sorry for picking on us dimensionally challenged i'm going to mod my airsoft to shoot ones at you all 



Spoiler



i thought wop dad was teaching law and mr. chandler was teaching home ec?


----------



## CWCissey (Jan 9, 2015)

Belligerent ghouls run Kiwi schools...


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 9, 2015)

Liquid Squirtle said:


> Kinda glad they got rid of the assistant phys ed teacher Tyce though, he always made the basketballs reek of jenkem.



I remember he would always steal the lab mice


----------



## Golly (Jan 10, 2015)

I'm thrilled to announce that this year,  the glee club will be collaborating with composer David Tanny. We are excited to be bringing new life to such classics as "Oh, Happy Boy", "I'm a Cowboy", and as a special challenge,  "The Boy Who Asked For Too Much. "


----------



## Randall Fragg (Jan 10, 2015)

Yo, I'm selling weed and LSD if anyone's interested. Meet me at the McDunalds parking lot down the road when school gets out.


----------



## RetardBus (Jan 10, 2015)

Cow has to be the shitty special needs school nearby where all of the people who were expelled from Kiwi High go if they don't just drop out, and a place that's known for being completely bonkers. To this day Xalver is in his 20's and has yet to graduate, still trying to win the affection of all of the /cow/ at Cow Pasture High School.

They say the principal's office is decorated with some strange space age shit, and he's been known to jerk off with alien-like figures and strange objects when students are busy with class.


----------



## Overcast (Jan 10, 2015)

Dear Diary, 

My first few weeks at Kiwi High have been interesting to say the least. Met up with a lot of interesting people.

Friggen Golden Knight is always sneaking off of campus to play around with the children who live near the school. Guy gives me weird vibes.

And then there's Dobson always acting up in art class. He doesn't seem to get along with the teacher very well, and even less so with Principal Null. It's strange, ever since he first came here, the staff complained about having a hard time finding balloons when setting up for events.

I have met up with my old gal pals Applecat and Hunger Mythos. They've always been nice to me. My old man negotiated pretty darn hard to convince them to hang out with me back in elementary school.

Today in particular was kind of eventful. After talking with LordDarkrai, I walked down the hall and got hit on the head by what looked like a pile of furry porn. Ever since then, I've been getting this weird image in my head that's becoming somewhat less fuzzy as the day went on. Not sure what it is yet. Hopefully I'll find out later.

Until then, good night diary. I'm going to play some games and maybe build a lego model of Vivi.

-scorptatious


----------



## Dollars2010 (Jan 10, 2015)

EleSigma said:


> Rumor has it @FramerGirl420 is trying to win the homecoming queen. Good luck to her since she'll have to beat @Hunger Mythos who holds it right now as well as all the other freakin' awards in the school.
> 
> Damn overachievers.


I worked very hard to earn my pretty ribbons and titles. 
https://sneed-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/c3/ba/1d/c3ba1ddb5ce9c607fcba9140f35c489d.jpg
I totally did not earn them by being a bully.


----------



## Surtur (Jan 10, 2015)

The King has arrived baby.


----------



## Dr. Mario (Jan 10, 2015)

I hope to make a whole bunch of new friends through _negociation_.


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 10, 2015)

Now that I've woken up with my desk covered in vomit, I actually have a plan for the football team. Give Sanic the ball and outdraw the soccer team so I can wipe that smug look off of coach @Alan Pardew's face.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

Surtur said:


> The King has arrived baby.



*insert fangirl squeel here*

Anyways, Fia for homecoming queen! *hands out buttons*


----------



## KatsuKitty (Jan 10, 2015)

Katsu sits quietly in the library in his kitty ear hoodie. ._.


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 10, 2015)

KatsuKitty said:


> Katsu sits quietly in the library in his kitty ear hoodie. ._.


Does this mean you're not coming to my slumber party?


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

Soooooo are all the mods and admins on student council?


----------



## KatsuKitty (Jan 10, 2015)

FramerGirl420 said:


> Does this mean you're not coming to my slumber party?



Can we paint each other's nails and talk about cute boys?


----------



## Randall Fragg (Jan 10, 2015)

Hey, anyone want to go TP Professor Wu's house?


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 10, 2015)

Okay, the big game against the L. Shy High Wizards is next Friday. @The Dude, you'll be protecting @Glaive's blind side. He's a small guy, but he reminds of Drew Brees, so keep his jersey completely yellow. @Sanic, you'll be outrunning everyone because you're fast and your weed is awesome. @Rio, you'll be endguardtackle. Sit at the end of the bench, guard the Gatorade and tackle anyone who tries to take it. And @RetardBus, "take care" of the opposing quarterback any way you can. Because you're our star outside linebacker. And, if I catch that creepy Woody Chan guy hassling my players again, I'll make him watch @Connor make love to his blow-up doll.


----------



## applecat (Jan 10, 2015)

Dear diary,

Everyone at this school is a total sperg. Art class is the only thing that keeps me going. God, I hope I get accepted into that exchange program.







_Cordialement,_

_applecat_


----------



## Arkangel (Jan 10, 2015)

I just transfered here from CWCki High. My parents say this is my last chance to shapen up or they'll send me to /cow/ academy for troubled youth.


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 10, 2015)

Does anyone want to join the Tomgirl + Tomboy club.... I heard professor Chandler is the leader of the group.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 10, 2015)

Randall Fragg said:


> Yo, I'm selling weed and LSD if anyone's interested. Meet me at the McDunalds parking lot down the road when school gets out.



Drug peddling in schools. Hello not 90s!



Randall Fragg said:


> Hey, anyone want to go TP Professor Wu's house?



Who's Wu?


----------



## The Knife (Jan 10, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Soooooo are all the mods and admins on student council?



Pfft, it's a big popularity contest.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 10, 2015)

applecat said:


> I've heard they passed a "no murring" policy this year.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



If you're voiced by Eva Gabor, I know who my date for seinor prom will be!


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Jan 10, 2015)

If there is a mean girls clique, I want in on that bitch.


----------



## applecat (Jan 10, 2015)

Queen of Tarts said:


> If there is a mean girls clique, I want in on that bitch.



We call them Ween Girls here.


----------



## WachtAmWeb (Jan 10, 2015)

You'll find me in the military history section of the library guize


----------



## Waifu (Jan 10, 2015)

Hope I can make it to homecumming... I've got some detentions piled up.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

I got the T-shirt cannon ready for the big game!






I already got everything for the sleepover! We can like play nintendo and mystery date and fib finder and stuff and... and HAVE PILLOW FIGHTS!


----------



## Abethedemon (Jan 10, 2015)

I hear Mr. Connors is going to cancel the class and smoke. This probably won't bode well with Principal Chandler.


----------



## Waifu (Jan 10, 2015)

I applied to have a club for those interested in furthering their sexual education, but it was rejected due to Professor @Judge Holden already 'having it covered, literally'. Whatever that means.


----------



## Arkangel (Jan 10, 2015)

I signed up for computer classes because I want to learn how to run a forum about retards. I think I found my calling in life.


----------



## BatNapalm (Jan 10, 2015)

I never go to classes, I just leave misspelled bomb threats on all the toilet stalls.

This is who I am and what I do.


----------



## Overcast (Jan 10, 2015)

BatNapalm said:


> I never go to classes, I just leave misspelled bomb threats on all the toilet stalls.
> 
> This is who I am and what I do.



I was wondering whether those drawings were bombs or boobs.


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 10, 2015)

Waifu said:


> I applied to have a club for those interested in furthering their sexual education, but it was rejected due to Professor @Judge Holden already 'having it covered, literally'. Whatever that means.



Axolotl Counselor says that Waifu is perfectly trustworthy to handle all of your sexual education needs and that free Pepsi shall be dispensed during club meetings.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

*grabs the mic to the intercom*

GUYS WE HAVE DVDS OF LAST SEMESTER'S G GUNDAM: THE MUSICAL ON ICE ON SALE RIGHT NOW! Proceeds will go toward the funding of the Dave Tanny tribute and the theatre department... and ummm... submissions for our daily themes for homecoming week and for the dance are open, we'll need volunteers to help with decorating and photography and music or know someone who can help us for free so please submit before the deadline and so are suggestions for future fundraiser events! Student Life Committee head officer signing out!


----------



## Overcast (Jan 10, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counselor says that Waifu is perfectly trustworthy to handle all of your sexual education needs and that free Pepsi shall be dispensed during club meetings.



You're a counselor?

That does explain why you axolotl questions.

...

...

Sorry, I'll leave.


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 10, 2015)

scorptatious said:


> You're a counselor?
> 
> That does explain why you axolotl questions.
> 
> ...



Axolotl Counselor frowns upon your puns.


----------



## CaptainDong (Jan 10, 2015)

exball said:


> I am afraid of Waifu and her Tunnel Snakes gang.


Wait...Waifu's in the Tunnel Snakes?!  

I want in on this shit.


----------



## Sanic (Jan 10, 2015)

@Sanic _ Cuts class and smokes in the bathroom._


----------



## FramerGirl420 (Jan 10, 2015)

BatNapalm said:


> I never go to classes, I just leave misspelled bomb threats on all the toilet stalls.
> 
> This is who I am and what I do.


DA BOM IS COMING


----------



## The Dude (Jan 10, 2015)

Who wants to sluff class with me today? We'll pile into my truck, head out to the desert, put on some Ramones and break out the weed.


----------



## WonkeyDong (Jan 10, 2015)

Law class is no doubt the best class, Though some freaky shit keeps happening like ghosts when the teacher brings in his hippie girlfriend who randomly changes into a chick with amazing tits


----------



## Abethedemon (Jan 10, 2015)

I hear that Mr. Geis is suing The College of St. Rose's team, the golden knights.
Looking forward to the seinor prom.


----------



## CaptainDong (Jan 10, 2015)

The Dude said:


> Who wants to sluff class with me today? We'll pile into my truck, head out to the desert, put on some Ramones and break out the weed.



I call shotgun!


----------



## exball (Jan 10, 2015)

WonkeyDong said:


> Law class is no doubt the best class, Though some freaky shit keeps happening like ghosts when the teacher brings in his hippie girlfriend who randomly changes into a chick with amazing tits


Is it taugh by Professor Peppy?


----------



## Saney (Jan 10, 2015)

I'm making a Loveshy Slaying club, who wants in?


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

Saney said:


> I'm making a Loveshy Slaying club, who wants in?



count me in!


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 10, 2015)

Saney said:


> I'm making a Loveshy Slaying club, who wants in?



Axolotl Counselor must remind you to keep loveshy blood off the linoleum as it has the capability to infect other students with loveshy disease.


----------



## KatsuKitty (Jan 10, 2015)

Did someone say...high?


----------



## Saney (Jan 10, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counselor must remind you to keep loveshy blood off the linoleum as it has the capability to infect other students with loveshy disease.



It's cool, we bring tarps with us.


----------



## WonkeyDong (Jan 10, 2015)

exball said:


> Is it taugh by Professor Peppy?


naw, i think his name is like, wright or something


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 10, 2015)

In honor of Autism Awareness Doctor/Professor Chandler would like to remind you it's not genetic. 

Also I was thinking about starting a reverse hacking club where you learn to reverse hack things that have been hacked.


----------



## Grand Number of Pounds (Jan 10, 2015)

ADF for government

Robert Stainek for literature

The amazing atheist for comparative religion

Onideus Mad Hatter for web design and ebusiness

David Tanny for music

Carlos Chantor for Spanish

Eli for geography

JROTC with Jace


----------



## Dr. Meme (Jan 10, 2015)

If kiwi farms was a school I'd drop out


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

Saney said:


> It's cool, we bring tarps with us.


And disinfectant!


----------



## morganna (Jan 10, 2015)

This grading system is so weird
Yesterday I got an A-Log on my Home Ec assignment.


----------



## Waifu (Jan 10, 2015)

If you wanna join the Tunnel Snakes... Ya' gotta make it through initiation.


----------



## exball (Jan 10, 2015)

Waifu said:


> If you wanna join the Tunnel Snakes... Ya' gotta make it through initiation.


O-oh my...


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 10, 2015)

Waifu said:


> If you wanna join the Tunnel Snakes... Ya' gotta make it through initiation.



Just, don't do it on my football field. Just...don't again.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 10, 2015)

morganna said:


> This grading system is so weird
> Yesterday I got an A-Log on my Home Ec assignment.



Next time don't call the assignment a "Fat fucking welfare leech" and wish it would die.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 10, 2015)

morganna said:


> This grading system is so weird
> Yesterday I got an A-Log on my Home Ec assignment.



I get a lot of "gay and unrealistics" too


----------



## Dr. Meme (Jan 10, 2015)

Waifu said:


> If you wanna join the Tunnel Snakes... Ya' gotta make it through initiation.


Way ahead of ya


----------



## Cute Anime Girl (Jan 10, 2015)

Guess who #jenked the bathroom stalls?


----------



## The Dude (Jan 10, 2015)

Cute Anime Girl said:


> Guess who #jenked the bathroom stalls?



Connor?


----------



## Duke Nukem (Jan 11, 2015)

The Dude said:


> Connor?



Likely except for the fact that I don't think he would write #skeetailin and #prrrnkmstr in the splattered jenk with his fingers.

Then again, you never know. #tyced #pronk #whytpowr #skeltin


----------



## Sanic (Jan 11, 2015)

This'll probably be playing around the school.


----------



## Saney (Jan 11, 2015)

Sanic said:


> This'll probably be playing around the school.



No, I hijacked the PA system, now this plays wherever I go.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 11, 2015)

I'm going to ask @Pikonic to the prom. I hope she says yes.


----------



## RetardBus (Jan 11, 2015)

Hey Coach @Pine Tar, the opposing quarterback has been taken care of. Some supplies from my father's butcher shop helped, to say the least. I have some nice concrete shoes and a boat by the docks set up for you, so you can deliver him to his scenic destination in some remote lake area, probably by the mountains. Put the goods in the trunk of your car when driving to the pier, and good luck coach.


----------



## Xarpho (Jan 11, 2015)

There needs to be a study hall by Hunger Mythos with lots of corgis to play with.


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 11, 2015)

RetardBus said:


> Hey Coach @Pine Tar, the opposing quarterback has been taken care of. Some supplies from my father's butcher shop helped, to say the least. I have some nice concrete shoes and a boat by the docks set up for you, so you can deliver him to his scenic destination in some remote lake area, probably by the mountains. Put the goods in the trunk of your car when driving to the pier, and good luck coach.



Alright, will do! I put that stuff on our teams jerseys and no one will be able to tackle them. Just like the Denver Broncos back in '97.


----------



## Cute Anime Girl (Jan 11, 2015)

Kiwi High football.


----------



## Pikonic (Jan 11, 2015)

The Dude said:


> I'm going to ask @Pikonic to the prom. I hope she says yes.


Please, going to the conformist drama dance is so beneath me


----------



## The Dude (Jan 11, 2015)

Pikonic said:


> Please, going to the conformist drama dance is so beneath me



*Stands outside Pikonic's bedroom window holding up boom box playing "In Your Eyes" like John Cusack in Say Anything*


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 11, 2015)

The Dude said:


> *Stands outside Pikonic's bedroom window holding up boom box playing "In Your Eyes" like John Cusack in Say Anything*



Axolotl Counselor says that whether or not a stalking charge will be pressed against you is dependent on the music you play outside the window, so for fuck's sake, pick a better love ballad.


----------



## Dollars2010 (Jan 11, 2015)

Xarpho said:


> There needs to be a study hall by Hunger Mythos with lots of corgis to play with.


If someone is feeling stressed, being attacked by sads, or anything, my crew and I shall bring many comforts to all of Kiwi High.


----------



## Pikonic (Jan 11, 2015)

Which one of us is the dashing rich blond lacrosse bro that has everything?


----------



## The Dude (Jan 11, 2015)

Pikonic said:


> Which one of us is the dashing rich blond lacrosse bro that has everything?



Not me. I'm the beefy loner punk rocker brooding moodily while sitting on the tailgate of my truck.


----------



## Pikonic (Jan 11, 2015)

@Rio is the cute foreign exchange student.


----------



## Overcast (Jan 11, 2015)

Dear Diary,

The prom is coming up and I don't have a date! D :

I tried to ask Glaive-Senpai, but I saw him with a girl!

If I don't find a date soon, I'll have to take my mom! And she's so unbearable to be around!

Hmmm... Maybe I can set up a booth with an attraction sign? Yes! It's such a brilliant plan! There's no way it wouldn't work!

Besides that, people kept throwing pennies at me and yelling stuff such as  "Hanako tastes like bacon!" and "Give me the Chocolate Hisao!"

Makes me feel all prickly inside...

Oh well. Good night Diary.

-scorptatious

P.S. If I somehow dropped this diary in the middle of campus and someone reads this, I'll be behind the bleachers. Please bring pickles.


----------



## Oglooger (Jan 11, 2015)

this is all you nerds need to know about Kiwi high school


----------



## John Titor (Jan 11, 2015)

So apparently the only Japanese teacher is hospitalized and they had to get a substitute, who by the way is Pixy. Say what you want about Peggy Hill and her Spanish but at least she tries; even if she isn't real.


----------



## Oglooger (Jan 11, 2015)

CWCKI's PA was hijacked


----------



## The Dude (Jan 11, 2015)

So my band is playing at @Sanic 's house next weekend. You guys are invited if you wanna come or whatever.


----------



## Waifu (Jan 11, 2015)

Lemme know if you wanna join Waifu's Tunnel Snakes... I'll make sure to get you a jacket. ; )


----------



## Arkangel (Jan 11, 2015)

Did anyone else see this weird kid on campus today? He was walking around muttering about serial killers into a recording device. I think it was that same kid who keeps telling people he's writing some kind of novel or something.


----------



## Cute Anime Girl (Jan 11, 2015)

Me at Kiwi High.


----------



## Dr. Meme (Jan 11, 2015)

Hello fellow teenagers! I'm here looking for a toke to smoke lol! does anyone know where i can hit up the bong hahaha no cops tho lol ahah who is selling drugs i'm not a narc!


----------



## Cute Anime Girl (Jan 11, 2015)

Dr. Meme said:


> Hello fellow teenagers! I'm here looking for a toke to smoke lol! does anyone know where i can hit up the bong hahaha no cops tho lol ahah who is selling drugs i'm not a narc!


----------



## The Dude (Jan 11, 2015)

Ziltoid said:


> Did anyone else see this weird kid on campus today? He was walking around muttering about serial killers into a recording device. I think it was that same kid who keeps telling people he's writing some kind of novel or something.



Pretty sure it was the same guy who brought the Molly Ringwald blowup doll to homecoming.


----------



## Ronald Gaygun (Jan 11, 2015)

Dr. Meme said:


> Hello fellow teenagers! I'm here looking for a toke to smoke lol! does anyone know where i can hit up the bong hahaha no cops tho lol ahah who is selling drugs i'm not a narc!


----------



## EI 903 (Jan 11, 2015)

Don't know why I keep getting referred to the counselor. It's perfectly normal to wear a trench coat to school every day, damn it. This is supposed to be a free country.


----------



## Dr. Meme (Jan 11, 2015)

hahaha whattt i'm just jokn round with you guys and you know joing rymes with tokingggg ahaha 520 friends let me get some of that devil's green!!!


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

So I was in Mr. Chandler's class today. He was telling us how when we graduate that we should go to PVCC and get CADD degrees. When I told him how stupid that was and that CADD degrees are worthless he fucking freaked out and tried to pepper spray me. Who the hell hired this guy as a teacher anyways?


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> So I was in Mr. Chandler's class today. He was telling us how when we graduate that we should go to PVCC and get CADD degrees. When I told him how stupid that was and that CADD degrees are worthless he fucking freaked out and tried to pepper spray me. Who the hell hired this guy as a teacher anyways?


But he's a genius who graduated from PVCC with a CADD degree on the honor roll.


----------



## Surtur (Jan 12, 2015)

The Beard is in.


Waifu said:


> Lemme know if you wanna join Waifu's Tunnel Snakes... I'll make sure to get you a jacket. ; )


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 12, 2015)

I'm running away from my asshole parents. They said I couldn't get my septum pierced, and so I told my mom she can't control me. I'm almost an adult. Can I move in with someone pls?


----------



## Arkangel (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> So I was in Mr. Chandler's class today. He was telling us how when we graduate that we should go to PVCC and get CADD degrees. When I told him how stupid that was and that CADD degrees are worthless he fucking freaked out and tried to pepper spray me. Who the hell hired this guy as a teacher anyways?


I heard Mr. Chandler got in trouble with the district committee for vandalizing the main school banner. He kept attacking it while yelling "THE SCHOOL COLORS ARE NOT BLUE!!!" and security had to take him down. His hearing will be very soon.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

Ziltoid said:


> I heard Mr. Chandler got in trouble with the district committee for vandalizing the main school banner. He kept attacking it while yelling "THE SCHOOL COLORS ARE NOT BLUE!!!" and security had to take him down. His hearing will be very soon.



Good. He gives me a bad vibe and gives all the chicks rape eyes.


----------



## CWCissey (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> So my band is playing at @Sanic 's house next weekend. You guys are invited if you wanna come or whatever.



Pfft, my band is better. *flicks quiff*


----------



## Duke Nukem (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> Good. He gives me a bad vibe and gives all the chicks rape eyes.



Remember that time he walked around the school's hallways, holding that sign begging for a "Boyfriend Free Girl?" Even I thought that was fucking weird. 

Forget all that, I'm looking forward to Phys Ed. with Sgt. Connors.


----------



## Rio (Jan 12, 2015)

Pikonic said:


> @Rio is the cute foreign exchange student.


o-oh dear! 

Everyone is looking forward to P.E. with mister Connors. The only problem is that he often needs to take puke breaks during his demonstrations. It's always an eventful class though. I can't wait for him to teach us about WW2 if he ever gets to fill in for history, like he said he might.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 12, 2015)

Hellblazer said:


> Don't know why I keep getting referred to the counselor. It's perfectly normal to wear a trench coat to school every day, damn it. This is supposed to be a free country.



Fedoras and Trenchcoats and MLP shirts are just some of the few things against school dress code. You should know this being on student counsel.


----------



## LegoTugboat (Jan 12, 2015)

Black Sonichu said:


> Forget all that, I'm looking forward to Phys Ed. with Sgt. Connors.



You mean 5 star general Connors. Don't you remember how he got promoted in boot camp?


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 12, 2015)

Oh look at this, I got out of class early! Lucky me for keeping up to date on all my homework so I can spend the rest of the afternoon smoking.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

Sluffed school today and sat in my truck writing angst ridden poetry and song lyrics. I saw some kid huffing something out of a bottle that had this nasty brown liquid in it. Then he started screaming about skeletons and Area 51 and passed out.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> Sluffed school today and sat in my truck writing angst ridden poetry and song lyrics. I saw some kid huffing something out of a bottle that had this nasty brown liquid in it. Then he started screaming about skeletons and Area 51 and passed out.



Is he in special ed? I heard that guy is the most retarded person in existence.


----------



## Abethedemon (Jan 12, 2015)

For our senior prank, let's call Principal Chandler and pretend we're Batman!


----------



## exball (Jan 12, 2015)

Alright guys, this thread is getting too autistic.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 12, 2015)

My mom is making me join the gay ass Soccer team to make friends.  she said she's tired of paying my joy boys off. I'm going to get revenge by getting a super rad tattoo!!!  I am going to be the coolest kid in class when you see a Yu-gi-oh characters cover my skin.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

TFW no girls ask you to Sadie Hawkins.


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> TFW no girls ask you to Sadie Hawkins.



Axolotl Counselor feels the need to inform you that this wouldn't happen if you were actually attractive.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counselor feels the need to inform you that this wouldn't happen if you were actually attractive.



Yeah I know I'm ugly. You don't need to remind me. I have eyes.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> Yeah I know I'm ugly. You don't need to remind me. I have eyes.


Dude, professor Jace was giving a pep talk to all of the guys today so they can h get lad... I mean dates.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Dude, professor Jace was giving a pep talk to all of the guys today so they can h get lad... I mean dates.



I'm pretty sure Prof hasn't seen pussy since he was born.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 12, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Dude, professor Jace was giving a pep talk to all of the guys today so they can h get lad... I mean dates.



He stomps all over his clothes! No girl would date a guy who stomps on his clothes.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

TrippinKahlua said:


> He stomps all over his clothes! No girl would date a guy who stomps on his clothes.



And who would want to make the Beast With Two Backs with someone who will likely puke on her when he busts nut?


----------



## BOLDYSPICY! (Jan 12, 2015)

Lunchlady BOLDYSPICY! reminding everyone that lunch for today is a breadtangle of pizza.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 12, 2015)

BOLDYSPICY! said:


> Lunchlady BOLDYSPICY! reminding everyone that lunch for today is a breadtangle of pizza.


It better not be that nasty ass frozen pizza!
Btw at lunch today the anime club is meeting to discuss our annual fundraiser. Professor Pixyteri is going to be dressed in her Lolita dress to encourage us to embrace her Japanese Heritage then we're going to ignorance her and watch the first Berserk movie.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 12, 2015)

The Joker said:


> My mom is making me join the gay ass Soccer team to make friends.  she said she's tired of paying my joy boys off..


You sure will make friends at soccer



Spoiler










Does anyone know what they want to do for science fair?  I know it's a little bit far off, but still. I would probably do some Skinner box work, but Tyce took all my mice!


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 12, 2015)

Fialovy said:


> Does anyone know what they want to do for science fair?  I know it's a little bit far off, but still.



Axolotl Counselor recommends potato batteries.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 12, 2015)

TheAmazingAxolotl said:


> Axolotl Counselor recommends potato batteries.



If I can ever get more lab mice for my Skinner Box project and find a way to make sure Tyce won't steal them then sure, that would be a good back-up plan


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

I was going to write a book report on Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson, but the English teacher told me it had to be on Maradonia. She flipped the fuck out on me when I said Thompson was the greatest author in modern history, then the dumb bitch said she'd have her parents sue me for slander and libel. She's a fucking nut job, man.


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 12, 2015)

I was taking anatomy but any time i tried to learn about the skeletal system but I could never find the display for it. Anyone know where it went?


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

TM Ambrose said:


> I was taking anatomy but any time i tried to learn about the skeletal system but I could never find the display for it. Anyone know where it went?



You mean the one the teacher named Rika?


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> You mean the one the teacher named Rika?


Yeah I think so.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 12, 2015)

TM Ambrose said:


> Yeah I think so.



I think I saw that twitchy burnout who was huffing from a bottle with it. He put a red wig and lingerie on it. That kid is fucked in the head, man


----------



## TM Ambrose (Jan 12, 2015)

The Dude said:


> I think I saw that twitchy burnout who was huffing from a bottle with it. He put a red wig and lingerie on it. That kid is fucked in the head, man


Was he the one who made all the labels that said "Skilatin"


----------



## The Dude (Jan 13, 2015)

TM Ambrose said:


> Was he the one who made all the labels that said "Skilatin"



Yup. And drew hearts around Hitler and Himmler in the 20th Century history books.


----------



## Duke Nukem (Jan 13, 2015)

LegoTugboat said:


> You mean 5 star general Connors. Don't you remember how he got promoted in boot camp?



Oh yeah, I forgot. I swear to GodJesus, his rank seems to change literally every fucking day. Speaking of boot camp, that jenkem smelling faggot Tyce is spreading rumors again about General Connors being in Jesus Camp instead.

I'm gonna help our resident Marine pay him a visit tonight, with a skateboard, foam nunchucks, and some CO2 airsoft pistols in case he cheats and we have to switch to ranged attacks. EAT BBS FAGGOT!!!!! 

Anyway, I have to bench press a grand number of pounds with him in preparation for the battle. Hey,  agreed to take on both of us at once, although I tried to talk him out of it.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 13, 2015)

Mr. Connors did not go to Jesus camp. That guy literally repels happiness so much he'd never stand to be around the spirit of Jesus.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 13, 2015)

Double post yo!

Did you guys see that little, weird TK guy? The one who climbs on lockers, sings only to himself and constantly acts like he's still in elementary school but when he acts normal, he is like 20 or so years older? I mean, he always laughs when someone pretends to be a valley girl, he always tucks his shirt into his shorts, and he's always watching old music videos from ABBA and Madonna on his iPad.

Oh wait, that was all me! I love spreading around rumors about myself.


----------



## Naamaleipuri (Jan 13, 2015)

Hey guys. I'm the new transfer student from europe, you'll recognize me from my thick scandinavian accent.

I'd like to ask more students to join the boxing club. It's just me and mr. Connors and he's giving me some very strange advice like "Footwork isn't as important as you think" and he brings weird things like practise swords, bows and BB guns to the ring. 
During the last training session he was showing me his best warm up technicues and after 10 minutes he puked on me. After calming down, he showed me the proper way to do push ups, but after 10 or so he passed out. I decided to take my leave after I noticed a puddle forming under his pants.


----------



## The Joker (Jan 13, 2015)

Breaking news fellow students! The anatomical skeletons were stolen from the bio lab. The only clue was a message spray painted on the wall that said: _race war. Skeletenz r poepl to! _
This is sick, the last time this happened the skeletons were found but it looked like some one had tried to have their way with it.


----------



## TheAmazingAxolotl (Jan 13, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Breaking news fellow students! The anatomical skeletons were stolen from the bio lab. The only clue was a message spray painted on the wall that said: _race war. Skeletenz r poepl to! _
> This is sick, the last time this happened the skeletons were found but it looked like some one had tried to have their way with it.



Axolotl Counselor would like to remind you that skeleletons are in fact people too.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Jan 13, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Breaking news fellow students! The anatomical skeletons were stolen from the bio lab. The only clue was a message spray painted on the wall that said: _race war. Skeletenz r poepl to!_
> This is sick, the last time this happened the skeletons were found but it looked like some one had tried to have their way with it.



Goddamn that most retarded person in existence. When I see him again, I'm gonna capture him and force him and Mr. Connors to meet up and duke it out.

Hope that fuck Mr. Eli doesn't interfere.


----------



## John Furrman (Jan 13, 2015)

Calling professor @NobleGreyHorse to teach Intro. to SJW 1000


----------



## The Dude (Jan 13, 2015)

I heard that @littlebiscuits is throwing a party at her house this weekend while her parents are out of town. Who's going?


----------



## silentprincess (Jan 13, 2015)

Can I enrol?


----------



## The Dude (Jan 13, 2015)

silentprincess said:


> Can I enrol?



Absolutely. I hear there is an excellent art program at this school.


----------



## Grand Number of Pounds (Jan 13, 2015)

I'm sorry to say JROTC Commandant Jace Connors was disciplined for calling the cadets "little faggots"


----------



## CatParty (Jan 13, 2015)

school is for nerds


----------



## The Joker (Jan 13, 2015)

Art class was weird today. A  kid drew sonic with blue arms and Professor Chandler went nuts and got out his pepper spray while telling all the males in the class that they had detention.


----------



## silentprincess (Jan 13, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Art class was weird today. A  kid drew sonic with blue arms and Professor Chandler went nuts and got out his pepper spray while telling all the males in the class that they had detention.



I'm scared of coming to class now


----------



## The Dude (Jan 13, 2015)

silentprincess said:


> I'm scared of coming to class now



If he gets on your nerves just point behind him and shout "Look out! It's a homo with his dick out!" Hell run out of the class like his hair is on fire and his ass is catching.


----------



## Fialovy (Jan 13, 2015)

The Joker said:


> Breaking news fellow students! The anatomical skeletons were stolen from the bio lab. The only clue was a message spray painted on the wall that said: _race war. Skeletenz r poepl to! _
> This is sick, the last time this happened the skeletons were found but it looked like some one had tried to have their way with it.



The matchbox cars for our physics lab was stolen too... Hopefully the lab mice for my science fair is okay... otherwise I'm so gonna lose! I mean, even after I get them back they'll just be all traumatized!


----------



## Descent (Jan 13, 2015)

Was cleaning out some clutter and found my old highschool day planners and scanned a few pages before throwing them out.


Spoiler











Hey, know what's a good idea? Let's schedule a camping trip for the people in grade 8 who just entered highschool. Tell a bunch of young teens who don't know anyone to pair off into groups. Surely it won't effect their self esteem. Do it at the end of the year after they've made friends and it's summer? Fuck no! The freezing rain time of September is perfect.

Oh shit! Majora's Mask comes out next month ARROW ARROW ARROW!!!
no idea what that heart is for :/



Spoiler










The scanner didn't pick up the highlighter ink I used, but I was quite excited for the Red Dwarf movie that was supposed to be out at that time. And why shouldn't I be? They talked about it all the time on the offical website. IT WAS BASICALLY PROMISED!
_"Hopefully Red Dwarf movie comes out."_ Hopefully it does young Descent. Hopefully it does.JK it never did.



Spoiler













Spoiler










You know, just the usual complex work that you get in grade 11.



Spoiler










"Ask a/b demonology" 



Spoiler










"Bring Tea!" popped up three times through out the year in my planner for some reason.



Spoiler










These...things popped up every few pages in my planners. No one talks like that.



Spoiler










Holy fuck, the pretend people in my planner are intolerable.



Spoiler










Hard to read, but the middle note says "Eng. Questions & 6 points for/against: Porno, women not advancing the work force, life in city better than in country"


----------



## BOLDYSPICY! (Jan 14, 2015)

@TheAmazingAxolotl : Axolotl Counselor is my favorite thing ever & I start cracking up whenever I see your posts


----------



## The Dude (Jan 14, 2015)

The Knife said:


> She can teach us how to remove menstrual blood stains from a pair of nylon undies!



Ew!


----------



## Pine Tar (Jan 15, 2015)

Big game against L. Shy High is tomorrow. We've practiced, we had to fight off that weird woman from using our football field for her gang initiations and we really improved race relations when some shit-huffing dumbass started going off about a race war and "skleetins". After all, nothing improves cooperation like mutual hatred.


----------



## The Dude (Jan 15, 2015)

Guys! I just saw @FramerGirl420 and @CatParty making out behind shop!


----------



## Sigyn (Apr 14, 2015)

So if you're not in this then I s2g I dont hate you I'm just a loser and/or you werent in the chat during this very surreal conversation. 



Spoiler: Class of 2015








From Top left to bottom right:
@TheAmazingAxolotl as the band geek
@BOLDYSPICY!  as the artsy one
@CatParty as the school mascot who drinks way too much at football games and cusses out the gym teacher (Hellblazer)
@Rio as that one foreign exchange student from Sweden
@Waifu as the leader of the GTA fanclub
@Sanic, @Marvin and @Dynastia  as the prankster triumvirate
@Hellblazer as the VP who also has to be the gym teacher because budget cuts and we're all assholes
@Null as the prinicpal who has had way too  many reasons to end it all and not enough opportunities
@Cuddlebug as his secretary
@Glaive and @snakesvsplanes as that one couple
@DeagleDad420 as the shady school cop looking for terrorists
@Pandas Galore as that one nerd who is just so fucking done with everything
@KatsuKitty as the cheerleader
@wagglyplacebo as the everyman's bro
@Maruukat (I think? Did you change your avatar) and @Ronald Gaygun as the chess pervert.
Me as that one dork with the guitar who sometimes sings shit
and @Dormiebasne as the douchebag who was late to the fucking photo and so held everybody up

THERE. FML. Also inb4 "BETTER QUALITY PLS" I'll get it scanned onto my computer eventually.


----------



## Conrix (Apr 14, 2015)

(Forgot this even existed but I don't normally forum roleplay)

So outside of being an average-above average student who never really socializes and happens to be an RPG geek, I'd definitely try to socialize more (by that I mean participate in this RP thing if I can) and maybe start up a fencing club.


----------



## Overcast (Apr 14, 2015)

Last year was relatively disappointing. I spent the whole year doing nothing but hanging out in the japanese manga section of the library, while at the same time failing to grab the attention of a potential sweetheart.

@Glaive, the love of my life, is now with @Sanic, and that has brought my heart level down to -100%.

It's not over though! This year will be different! I've already made a new friend! His name is Jin, and he knows all there is about pleasing people. He's married to someone named Twilight Sparkle, and apparently they are having awesome sex! Oh, how I envy him! He even invited me over to have some fun with them sometime. I can't wait!

Shoot! I got to the assembly! Principal @Null says he's going to show the students a documentary about a man who has the mind of a baby! I'm excited!


----------



## Fialovy (Apr 14, 2015)

Where we last off I was trying to find my mice for my science fair project, I guess if I modify the Skinner Box I could use birds instead...

Also, I've been thinking next semester I should sign up as a teacher's assistant, I think my grades are pretty good, what do you think?


----------



## Abethedemon (Apr 14, 2015)

I call the student who is obsessed with underground black metal, and makes really lame one-man black metal in his basement. He would always dismiss other kinds of music as being "false" or "for posers" 
Secretly, he would listen to Christian and the Hedgehog Boys unironically.


----------



## Tsukiko (Apr 14, 2015)

Can I attend this school? My only qualification is a rad-ass hairstyle.


----------



## autisticdragonkin (Sep 11, 2015)

I am a recent transfer student who is very excited for starting Date Ed despite the idea sounding dated


----------



## Lemon Vagina (Sep 11, 2015)

I'm forming the Gay-Straight Alliance. Meetings after school but no white, cis, straight, male or abled people allowed.


----------



## AnOminous (Sep 11, 2015)

Lemon Vagina said:


> I'm forming the Gay-Straight Alliance. Meetings after school but no white, cis, straight, male or abled people allowed.



There needs to be a Gay-Straight Alliance to beat up the trannies.  Especially the tucutes.


----------



## Trickie (Sep 11, 2015)

I'm still the AP Art teacher, and I'm still doing all the stoned new age stuff, but recently I've had myself and the whole class painting with our feet instead of our hands, and I'm calling it a "fresh and engaging new form of expression", when in reality it's because my arms got broken by the Gay-Straight Alliance.


----------



## MasterDisaster (Sep 11, 2015)

I'd love to be the grumpy old janitor with a heart of gold that keep a tiny collection of exotic lizards in formaldehyde; and every night before I lock up the school I eat one.


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Sep 13, 2015)

Shit the high school is still here?

I thought it got abandoned after I smashed down and pushed all the lockers to the ground and vandalized all the walls with Pink and Purple spheres.


----------



## AN/ALR56 (Sep 13, 2015)

How well do you guys treat exchange students from favelado high?


----------



## Overcast (Sep 13, 2015)

Dear Diary,

Things only seem to be getting worse here. Remember when I said I made friends with a guy named Jin? Turns out I'm not really into his sexual escapades. Let's just leave it at that.

I tried getting closer to the ladies here at Kiwi High, but they all keep saying that "they already have a boyfriend". I tried asking my friend Marijan for advice, but he keeps telling me about how horrible western women are and that they need their bones broken.

There's also this weird trend going on where some of the other students are begging for money via something called "Patreon". I've seen a guy named Phil and Dobson trying to get people to pay them money to play old video games and make shitty art respectively.

It gave me an idea though. Perhaps if I have a Patreon, I can get some money to get people to like me! Then my love quest will finally be over!

I'm gonna go set up an account soon! But first, I gotta watch this movie for class tomorrow. Something called "Gen Zed". Looks very progressive!

See ya later!


----------



## Sanae Kochiya (Sep 13, 2015)

Spoiler: Wow, an excuse to use this pic.












So, what're we going to do about Barneyfag?  He keeps running up and down the hallways screaming about how that one classroom keeps playing Barney and that we need to kill the kids there.  It's getting obnoxious.

Also Thonis keeps hitting on the girls.  Can we beat him up?


----------



## autisticdragonkin (Sep 13, 2015)

https://kiwifarms.net/media/running-to-date-ed.474/full?d=1442165628 
I am late for class


----------



## TrippinKahlua (Sep 13, 2015)

I'm in detention for my autistic act. There is a rotten mango in the desk.


----------



## BrokenEntity (Sep 13, 2015)

Okay guys, I just got my midterm today from Kiwi High. Here's some of my results alongside some comments from the teachers.

----
MIDTERM FALL 2015:
----
--
DATING EDUCATION WITH MR. CHANDLER:
GRADE: 95%
COMMENTS:
"He did well this year. For a floating head, I didn't think that he'd be able to find a partner, but I was proven wrong. Keep zapping to the extreme, Broken!"
--

--
BIOLOGY WITH MR. COOLIDGE:
GRADE: 92%
COMMENTS:
"He did well. Wasn't afraid to ask questions. Had some trouble with reshiram biology, but he pulled through."
--

--
SOCIAL STUDIES WITH MRS. WU:
GRADE: 83%
COMMENTS:
"N/A"
--

--
PHILOSOPHY WITH MR. BATE:
GRADE: PASS
COMMENTS:
"Mr. Bate was put into jail. All students have been given a PASS grade."
--

--
ENGLISH WITH MR. STRIKER:
GRADE: gud
COMMENTS:
"null is a nigger whO SHOULD DIE"
--

To be honest I should probably go into virtual school.


----------



## DuskEngine (Mar 9, 2017)

lmao you pack of faggots


----------



## TheMightyMonarch (Mar 9, 2017)

Well since this thread has been bumped....

Onision as the theology teacher. We don't learn anything really, and instead he just bitches about how bad religion is. He's also the obligatory teacher who's creepy around female students.


----------



## Tempest (Mar 9, 2017)

@Asterisk appears to have gotten expelled after starting a fight with several students


----------



## FBongRizzle (Mar 9, 2017)

Are you guys pretending to be in high school or something? I don't get it, I'm new. Either way it seems pretty on the spectrum.


----------



## TheMightyMonarch (Mar 9, 2017)

FBongRizzle said:


> Are you guys pretending to be in high school or something? I don't get it, I'm new. Either way it seems pretty on the spectrum.


Where do you think we are?


----------



## Lackadaisy (Mar 9, 2017)

FBongRizzle said:


> Are you guys pretending to be in high school or something? I don't get it, I'm new. Either way it seems pretty on the spectrum.



Yes, yes it is.


----------



## Asuka (Mar 9, 2017)

@Heretics on Holiday is our own personal school shooter.


----------



## Lurkette (Mar 9, 2017)

i am the shy yet beautiful and amazingly talented new student who everyone loves and/or hates (there is no in between)
i'm wearing a long pink flowey dress with matching pink flats with little peach roses on them and some pink GIR bows in my hair as well as black fishnets (but my skirt is so long you can't see them) and black eyeliner and black lipstick and my backpack is hello kitty teehee


----------



## Tempest (Mar 9, 2017)

Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee


----------



## Cacanus (Mar 9, 2017)

When is the next penis examination day scheduled ?


----------



## CaptainMappy (Mar 11, 2017)

I'd probably be the photography teacher who constantly reminds his students that he's covered wars, you know.


----------



## Lurkette (Mar 11, 2017)

Tempest said:


> Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee



_*THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE*_


----------



## RI 360 (Jun 8, 2017)

I'm the school shooter.


----------



## MerriedxReldnahc (Jun 9, 2017)

I'm one of the edgelord weeb kids that hangs out in the furthest corner of the library or gathers around a computer snickering. You're afraid to look at the screen or ask what this "ani -may" or "hen tie" thing we talk about is. Ocassionally you hear the screech of IT'S OVER 9000.


----------



## cuddle striker (Jun 9, 2017)

entropyseekswork said:


> I'm the school shooter.


you know my dad the janitor is gonna have to clean that shit up


----------



## DICKPICSRUS (Jul 8, 2017)

I'm the kid that sells porn and panties.

$5 for a professional playboy magazine
$10 for a female kiwi nudes
$15 for her underwear


----------



## Terrorist (Jul 8, 2017)

*intercom crackles*
"Mr. Terrence Hussein Errorist, come to the principal's office this instant! If we find another used tampon IED in the teacher's lounge you're getting expelled, young man! "


----------



## Syaoran Li (Jul 8, 2017)

I'm not sure if I'd rather be a student or one of the staff in this high school.


----------



## drain (Jul 9, 2017)

im the fucking hapa that get bullied every day and eat turkey sandwiches all alone


----------



## Morose_Obesity (Jul 9, 2017)

I'm the guy who's stealing shit from the teachers lounge. Fuck yo lunch break.


----------



## Lurkette (Jul 13, 2017)

Syaoran Li said:


> I'm not sure if I'd rather be a student or one of the staff in this high school.



who said you have to have a legal reason to be here


----------



## Cheerlead-in-Chief (Jul 13, 2017)

I'll be the class history buff that draws too. Also, greets everyone on the way to class.


----------



## Pepito The Cat (Jul 13, 2017)

I'm the new immigrant student with a thick accent, light mustache and moderately cheap weed I get from my brother.


----------



## AnOminous (Jul 13, 2017)

Syaoran Li said:


> I'm not sure if I'd rather be a student or one of the staff in this high school.



You can be the weird guy in a panel van with tinted windows who always cruises around the school for unknown reasons.


----------



## Coconut Gun (Jul 13, 2017)

I'm the new teacher who was sent here to turn around the failing school. I spend the whole movie trying to reach these keeds. In the end I give up and kill myself because you're all fucking retarded.


----------



## cuddle striker (Jul 14, 2017)

Pepito said:


> I'm the new immigrant student with a thick accent, light mustache and moderately cheap weed I get from my brother.


my dad buys his weed from your brother


----------



## Captain Pipsqueak (Jul 14, 2017)

I have so much codeine in my system that my skin is beginning to glow.


----------



## WeaponsGradeAutism (Jul 14, 2017)

I'm the poor exchange student who wonders why Miss (?) Jones is shoving a 1 Liter bottle up her (?) ass during sex education. And contemplating running into the line of fire from the school shooter.


----------



## Lurkette (Jul 19, 2017)

i change my mind can i be xin, i want to be able to shred my bones and be ambidexterous and also beat everyone near death with no reprecussions because its basically martial law up in here


----------



## Y2K Baby (Jul 19, 2017)

I'm going to dox whoever took my chemistry textbook.


----------



## DICKPICSRUS (Jul 20, 2017)

Who's gonna be the local SJW?


----------



## MistressCaridad (Jul 20, 2017)

I'm that one chonga whose eyebrows are never drawn on the same, and whose voice you can hear over everyone else's in the courtyard at lunch.


----------



## BadaBadaBoom (Jul 20, 2017)

I am the one living under the stairs; fingers like snakes and spiders in my hair.


----------



## Kataomoi00 (Jul 21, 2017)

I'm the token innocent kid that doesn't automatically understand their friend's dirty humor


----------



## Coldgrip (Jul 21, 2017)

Does anybody need to be bullied today? I've got a free spot on my schedule after lunch shortly before my Algebra class starts and I want to be sure I fill up my weekly bullying quota.


----------



## Feline Darkmage (Jul 23, 2017)

I was voted into Student Council I didn't think anybody even knew I existed.

This school has to be filled with nerds if I'm the kind of person who wins the popularity contests.


----------



## Tempest (Jul 23, 2017)

I didn't know or care we had a student council


----------



## Coldgrip (Jul 24, 2017)

Tempest said:


> I didn't know or care we had a student council


Want to help push them into lockers or give them swirlies later?


----------

