# What if the worst thread 2?: Electric Hedgehog Boogaloo



## applecat (Aug 6, 2014)

What if Chris sold Bob's clothes on Ebay? I am better than Chris because I did not sell my father's clothing on Ebay, only his shoes. How many pairs of Bob's pants would you buy? I am better than Chris because my mother doesn't have cavities. Chris probably gave his mother cavities. Is it a COINCIDENCE that Barb has holes in her buttocks and now also in her teeth? WAKE UP CWCKIMERICA.

What if you were better than Chris?


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

I would like to steal Bob's clothes, sell them with the advice of tarot cards, spreading the wonders of Male Gamer Priviledge and making plans for Chris's Post Mortem Celebrations. 

I also think there should be many sagas should be named in Chris's life because this is super cereal important.

Also,  i agree great post


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## LM 697 (Aug 6, 2014)

CatParty said:


> Chris is retarded.
> 
> Think about it. It is true and funny.


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## Queen of Tarts (Aug 6, 2014)

Who isn't better than Chris?  Chris is worse than Hitler  

What if Barb destroyed all of Chris' vidya?


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Queen of Tarts said:


> Who isn't better than Chris?  Chris is worse than Hitler
> 
> What if Barb destroyed all of Chris' vidya?


Chris would shit himself and did nothing.

What if Chris was a human guinea pig?


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## Pikonic (Aug 6, 2014)

* u know who the fuck it is #pikonic bitch
Listen up theres 2 times in this world ok and
type of time #1: when im blazed
time #2: When I'm workin on my documentary on CWC which will include clips from the CWCki and me talking about how Chris is worse than Stalin. It'll be super popular and the world will find Chris as intresting as this 200 person internet clique. But I need ten grand so kickstarter it up.
#Documentary #faggotfaggotfaggot #likeigiveafukkkkkkkk*


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## Himawari (Aug 6, 2014)

First page.


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Pikonic said:


> *u know who the fuck it is #pikonic bitch
> Listen up theres 2 times in this world ok and
> type of time #1: when im blazed
> time #2: When I'm workin on my documentary on CWC which will include clips from the CWCki and me talking about how Chris is worse than Stalin. It'll be super popular and the world will find Chris as intresting as this 200 person internet clique. But I need ten grand so kickstarter it up.*


* REAL FUCKING FUNNY stop strealking my sthcik bitch im the real tyce ok*





*GONNA TAKE U OUT WITH SNIPER SHOTS FROM ACROSS THE WHOLE DESERT USMC AN SNIOPE U LIKE U READ ABOUT IN THE GOOD OL WOW BLAM WINTER WONDERLAND THATS U RED MIST BICH*
*















*


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## Pikonic (Aug 6, 2014)

Himawari said:


> First page.


This.


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## Pinhead (Aug 6, 2014)

juley


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Pinhead said:


> juley


*JULLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY*
*



*


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## Descent (Aug 6, 2014)

WHAT IF THEY MADE A DOCUMENTARY ABOUT CHRIS! Would you take part in it or watch it or fund it?


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Descent said:


> WHAT IF THEY MADE A DOCUMENTARY ABOUT CHRIS! Would you take part in it or watch it or fund it?


*BETTER IDEA HOW ABOUT U MAKE A DOCUMENTARY ABOUT UR DICK 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	







 welcome to verbal ownage zone*


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## Arkangel (Aug 6, 2014)

CALL THE RETARD TRAIN HEY LOOK I FOUND THE CAPTAIN SPOILER WARNING ITS U


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Ziltoid said:


> CALL THE exceptional individual TRAIN HEY LOOK I FOUND THE CAPTAIN SPOILER WARNING ITS U


*YA THAT'S U*​


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## applecat (Aug 6, 2014)

I am better than Chris because I am the captain and he is only like a servant boy at best. I think Chris should be tied to train tracks except then they'd become train craps.







Because he'd crap them.


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## exball (Aug 6, 2014)

What if Chris was less fat and gay and not a taxpayer leech? Than I wouldn't have to beat him to death with a baseball bat while screaming JULAAAYYY before pissing on him. Also I'm better than Chris because my face ain't fucking orange.


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## Pikonic (Aug 6, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> *BETTER IDEA HOW ABOUT U MAKE A DOCUMENTARY ABOUT UR DICK
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You could put it on microfilm…THAAAA that's chill dude fist bump it. 

JacexTyce 5ever


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

applecat said:


> I am better than Chris because I am the captain and he is only like a servant boy at best. I think Chris should be tied to train tracks except then they'd become train craps.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


* WE GOT A LIL SPERG IN THE CIRCUS CHOO CHOO CALL THE exceptional individual TRAIN WE GOT THE CAPTAIN ON BOARD!!! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


*


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## LM 697 (Aug 6, 2014)

the number one thing i want to do with my life is chew on chris' corpse dream of compy nailed to a tree covered in moss and mildew hes like kuato from total recall and also hes crying and michael snyders head and ribcage is taped onto his torso also he has and hes being beaten up by chris who poured meth down his throat and he has a plastic bag over his head and its being taped too itd be pretty neat if chris throat is slit and then immediately sewn back and hes bleeding and crying but he isnt dead. then i punch him in his fat nose twice and kick him in the head and hes still crying but he isnt dead. then i tape barb's left femur, ribcage, and ankle skin to chris' chest and set his arms on fire. then i nailgun him to a heavy wooden board and pretend that hes dead and i ignore him for a few minutes and then he calls for help and i retaliate by shoving burnt candles down his throat. then i loudly talk about his parents death which makes him cry. then i call up the crimson executioner from that one film and he tortures chris for a bit, but chris isnt dead.then his stomach caves in and hes barely awake so i hit him in the head with a 1000 pound sledgehammer, but hes still alive. then i insert a habitrail tube up his butt and it leads to his right ear, and so he shits in the tube which is motorized and shoots his poop up his ear. then hes blinded by one of barb's teeth that i tore out, but hes still alive. then i make chris into a pancake and gorilla glue bobs neck, left leg, and eyeballs to chris' shins and spit on him and call him gay and make a funeral pyre and pour liquidized meth down his nostrils and


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## Pikonic (Aug 6, 2014)

Why was DeagleDad banned?


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Pikonic said:


> Why was DeagleDad banned?


*Why was bgheff red?*


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## LM 697 (Aug 6, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> *Why was bgheff red?*


hey scumbag leave bgheff alone


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## Watcher (Aug 6, 2014)

CompyRex said:


> hey scumbag leave bgheff alone


no


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

CompyRex said:


> hey scumbag leave bgheff alone


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## Queen of Tarts (Aug 6, 2014)

What is Chris Teaches of Tomgirl-ed in your face?


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## Hyperion (Aug 6, 2014)

Anything in off topic.


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## José Mourinho (Aug 6, 2014)

Continuing from previous thread. Discuss:

I know this is probably an unpopular opinion, not to white knight or anything but Chris is not only subhuman scum deserving of nothing more than agony for all eternity, he also gives subhuman scum a bad name for his record breaking horrid nature and more autism than the spectrum has room for. But let’s think about something I don’t think has ever been discussed before, what happens when Barb finally eats her last Q-sand? What will Chris do without his spooning buddy and partner in crime? Who will scrape the poo off his briefs and sell me Bob's clothes?

I was reading an article about exactly that ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gr%C3%B6%C3%BBp_X ) and I think the government (if it isn’t still shut down and Chris doesn’t lose his house from it of course) might have to put him in a group home with local windows to hell, thugs and black tranny hookers that only speak the word  . There they can all earn their living working in local businesses, like the GAMe PLACe and the Ruckersville pickling plant. With Chris out of the house, archaeologists can finally come in and search the hoard for treasures of the past, like Bob’s record collection. And then without a tugboat Chris would really have to cut down his PS Tripling and stop eating McDonalds, which would set him straight and stop hating the gays and get his dogs taken away where they can be cared for properly.

This is what Chris is now






And this is what Chris could be in a group home





Since he’d no longer have the PS3 distracting him, would he finally appreciate the works of Willie Montenegro including but not limited to the sitcom “Whaaaat”, the film “It’s not a Diamond” and his talk show “Dinner in Space”? I don’t think he’d appreciate the intricacies of his genius and he’d ruin the fandom by mere association, but it’s from the 90’s so why doesn’t he talk about it as much as Sonic and Sonic? Maybe it has something to do with his untreated autism and undiagnosed childhood amnesia (http://www.ask.com/wiki/Childhood_amnesia?qsrc=3044)

This video is also a good example of something entirely unrelated to Chris that I know of and wonder what Chris thinks of it, despite the odds of Chris having ever seen it, let alone formed a strong opinion being near zero, like Chris’s sperm count.






Alternatively, the fact he doesn’t like things that I know about might have something to do with his brittle bones causing his butt to look weird while twerking. Chris also poops himself, which is something I’d like to explore in excessive depth (much like his anus which I think is shaped kind of weirdly in the pictures, either due to how little he takes care of his camera or his poop chute) I never saw him drinking much milk before, and the pastel coloured horses God sends into my dreams told me to drink milk and furiously masturbate to a cartoon. So are the bones of his weak like water? Does he got milk? I don’t know?? Help??? Discuss????

P.S. DIE CHRIS, YOU ARE NOT SOCIALLY AWESOME AND COOL. I HOPE YOU GET LYME DISEASE.

EDIT!!! The North Korean government is putting autism into your drinking straws and everybody's going to crap their briefs except Chris, wouldn't that be an interesting topic to discuss? NOT ON THIS FORUM BECAUSE OF OPPRESSIVE CENSORSHIP

EDIT 2!!! MALE'S A BUTT EDITION!
Since Chris has brittle bones and a weird shaped anus, it got me thinking about which pastel coloured horse would he most enjoy the company of? I relate well to Fluttershy because she's non threatening and submissive which really plays well into my extensive man on owl on horse on man sexual fantasies, but on the other hand Donkey has Shrek on his side and is layers ahead of the competition. I don't think Comet the superhorse would like Chris that much, he has a horse shlong that isn't bent and Chris would look away with a moment of being freaked out, but other than that they'd be the best of friends I think. Everypony can agree that Chris gives horses a bad name. but the real question is how bad of a name does he give horses and which character from a cartoon for little girls do you want to imagine him having hot tomgirl on pony sex with the most? I personally want to see Mr. Ed dig up Patti while having JULAY dubbed over his mouth while he pours meth down Chris's throat and makes him eat his underwear while Barb's flesh is ripped from her body by Megan's teeth while all parties involved have raging erections.

EDIT 3!!! MY DOCUMENTARY IS ON FIRE

I think it's about time we make a documentary about Chris. Here are the reasons it's a great idea and I'm a genius for coming up with it.

1) It appeals to everyone. Almost 2000 people are on this forum and every single last one of them wants a Chris documentary. 2000 people is about half the world so if we put it in theaters it'd make more money than Titanic and Star Wars combined because we'd want to see it a billion times.
2) So much new information. Imagine all the things you could learn about Chris as I lift information directly from the cwcki and heavily cut in order to fit the length of a film, since nobody is willing to do interviews.
3) I'm the best filmmaker in the known universe. I've been using Windows Movie Maker for longer than three weeks and I think I can go a whole day without shitting myself so I'm probably overqualified for the job, my ability to take videos we've already seen and add shitty voiceovers is technically nonexistent, but I'll probably figure that out soon enough.
4) I need money (unlike Chris who doesn't deserve a single red cent and everyone that would ever consider giving him anything under any circumstances should be ashamed of themselves for not giving it to someone more worthwhile, don't they know he's just going to waste it and keep being a useless ungrateful sack of crap?). Donate to my cwcstarter so I can tell you what you already know in a way that won't entertain or surprise you, I can't connect with the mainstream audience about something nobody cares about, but what I can do is take your cash. I've been selling a cure all tonic lately and I need money to fund my pending legal battle against Foulmouth for allegedly melting his feet off (even though he lost weight and doesn't have to worry about foot blisters ever again). But enough about that, for the low low price of $40 000.95 I can deliver the quality Chris-related cinematic experiences your dicks have been hard for since April 2010.
5) I don't care about you or your opinions. You say it's a bad idea? Wrong, it was a bad idea for your mom to drink mercury when she was pregnant because it clearly made you so retarded that you can't even tell the difference between a great idea and potatoes. I will make this movie regardless of what you think*.

*I will not make this movie, I'll talk about it for a few days then I'll forget about it when I relapse into my crippling oatmeal addiction.

EDIT 4!!! Downwind?
Are 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 and 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 taken at the same place? I think these shitty stores went out of business but we should talk about them. Does Chris gotten banned from here and what for this time? I had a dream where he went to this store and bought a dozen red roses, but got beat up so bad he ended up burning his house down with a coffee maker, I think that's probably really what happened. Then later in my dream I started inflating a hot version of tomgirl Chris's titties like they were lopsided balloons full of cottage cheese but that's not the important part, I asked him(her? xir?) what xe thought about the new redesign for knuckles and he said he'd show me a thing or two about knuckles with regards to fists and asses. Then I woke up and wondered about the store thing. So what do you think? Please Discuss.

P.S. The A-logs are going to win and Null is a dick. But the question is, how long of a dick? Bigger than Bob? How big was Bob? Was his bent? Is Null?
Signature:


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## Arkangel (Aug 6, 2014)

Bob's Ass. Chris's clothes.


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## Pikonic (Aug 6, 2014)

CompyRex said:


> hey scumbag leave bgheff alone


The poster currently know as "Pikonic" here.

Seems that Compy is acting like a certain CWCville Mayor by asking people not to say things he doesn't like to face. Logged in this morning and saw he called Alan a scumbag.

Classy.

And all this because Alan simply regarded those who donated to Bgheff  and fed his ego to be wasting their good faith. Sorry Compy, but I'm not your personal Applecat and won't agree with you 100% of the time on everything. If I have an opinion then I will voice it.

So, since my account is shit around here anyway, I'm going to just lay it on the table. You guys might want to screencap this fast because Emperor Compy will surely nuke it off his little hugbox of a forum here. He sure doesn't like dissenting views that upset his fantasy world.

Helping Bgheff is just feeding Bgheff' ego. Anyone with a brain stem knows that Compy's $9001 is going straight to the Walmart electronics Dept. to buy Bgheff a new PS4 crackpipe. Doesn't matter if the Money Order was addressed to BrooklynBailiff . Bgheff will get it one way or another. Guaranteed. And when that _does_happen, you know what? Even though I probably will  have an account to express it, Compy, you can be assured I'm out there reading about it and I will be an I Told Ya So.

The name reddining was of Bgheff's doing, and whether intentional or accidental (and to be honest, I do think with Bgheff there's a good possibility he did it intentionally because even a drooling turd had read all the posts here about people being concerned that the forum would catch autism and Bgheff knows "RED BAD!" and it would help him escape the hoard), *he did start it*. Bailing his fat ass yet again from trouble just feeds Bgheff's ego and exemption from responsibility. This makes anyone who donated to Bgheff as much of an enabler as BrooklynBailiff is. Even Asskisser Applecat hasn't sucked Bgheff's ego-dick like Compy did.


But the odds of him escaping responsibility forever aren't good. BrooklynBailiff is certainly going to resign within a few years from now, and Bgheff will of course bawl up a storm on Facebook, then go running to the mailbox to see what sort of presents will be showered upon him by the suckers.  Bgheff is a sociopath. He's been trained to think "Bad thing happened to me again. *GIMMEE STUFF! DO THINGS FOR ME!*"

And then when Bgheff is all alone and finds no new host organism to leech onto in time, he will begin to feel the cold unmerciful hand of Reality start to grasp around him. Or I should say that it's going to be a fist because it's going to pound him flat into the dirt. As Threepio once said, "There's no escape for the Princess this time.". You going to let him move into your house and let him carry on being a giant stinky baby, Compy? I doubt it.

So, continue on with your little fantasy that you are are all good and decent people trying to help out an unfortunate little schlub. We all know that Bgheff is a vile excuse for a human, and that vileness will eventually be his undoing.

*In the end, one way or another, Alan Pardew is going to win.*


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## applecat (Aug 6, 2014)

I would never be Chris' personal asskisser because his ass is covered in crap and smells and it is also fat.

EDIT: My ass is better than Chris' ass.

EDIT 2 ECLEDIT BOOGALO: Compy's ass is best of all.


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## Ariel (Aug 7, 2014)

Would I fuck Chris?


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## Dr. Meme (Aug 7, 2014)

Not gay r anything but id like to smell Chris' fathers cloths any 1 no where I can buy them no homo


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## Coldgrip (Aug 7, 2014)

Chris needs to be kidnapped and taken to a cabin in the mountains so he can be brainwashed into being a better human being. Or brainwashed into becoming a sleeper agent that will kill and skin Barb when given the codeword. It's the only way to help him. I mean we all have this fantasy right?


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## Da Pickle Monsta (Aug 7, 2014)

It's threads like these that I'm glad I have a CWCki Premium account.


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## cypocraphy (Aug 7, 2014)

This is why I leave the forum forever 3 or 4 times a week.


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## LM 697 (Aug 7, 2014)

applecat said:


> EDIT 2 ECLEDIT BOOGALO: Compy's ass is best of all.


 Third best.


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## spaps (Aug 7, 2014)

jace quote


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## c-no (Aug 7, 2014)

what if CatParty wasn't dabes?


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## spaps (Aug 7, 2014)

c-no said:


> what if CatParty wasn't dabes?


>implying catparty won't always be dabes
kill yourself


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## c-no (Aug 7, 2014)

spaps said:


> >implying catparty won't always be dabes
> kill yourself


Already did. What if CatParty imparted us all with his dabes?


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## Ariel (Aug 7, 2014)

c-no said:


> what if CatParty wasn't dabes?


WTF!!!!! HOW DARE YOU?!?!?!?!?


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## A-Stump (Aug 7, 2014)

This thread contains illegal content. Your IP addresses have been traced by the best of my Internet detectives and you will rue your decisions. Cyber bullying will NOT be tolerated.


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## exball (Aug 7, 2014)

Chris is gay.


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## CatParty (Aug 7, 2014)

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## José Mourinho (Aug 7, 2014)

There will come a sad day in the future when this DEAGLE FUCK will die and we will hath lost our most prized LULZCOW.

We should all realize that this DEAGLE FUCK is not forever... One of these days, he's going to get dick slapped by a homosexual black man, and then he is going to kill himself on the livestream in shame (accidentally I might add, because we know he couldn't technically do it himself). That is, after he pulls his pants down in the livestream in order to prove that he is straight. So when the time comes for his inevitable burial.

So that's why we must form a DEATH DAY PARTY for our friend, Jace W. Connors. I'm saying we should IRL crash & raid his funeral, turning it into a "FUN!"-eral, wearing Guy Fawkes  masks and dick suits 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





  and all "PARTY HARD!!!" with loud music, free food, and drink. Flamboyant homosexuals are utmost welcome  .

We should spend the time there giving all these "sincere" mementos and speeches about how Jace sucked and how the state of Massachusetts will be better off without him and how the mysterious autism has finally dissipated!

Most importantly, the "big speech", we must recite his entire life and all his failures to everyone there, starting from how he burned his house in Sims 2 to his PRESS ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, to the inevitable future moment when he pulls his pants down in a livestream and gets heroically raped by a homosexual black man.

Then, after we finish telling our audience every single minor detail, complete with projector screens showing every Jace Connors video from the Jace Connors  youtube channel, in chronological order I may add, we will all proceed to spit, fart, piss, shit, and masturbate on his tombstone, kicking it and screaming "FUCK LIFE! WHAT A WASTE!" "FUCK YOUR LIFE! WHAT A WASTE!" and write "REST IN PIECES FAG" on the headstone while other may pour dicks and grilled cheese all over his grave. Firecrackers are also a necessity, I would suggest lighting them off at the start of our raid, as hundreds of Dicksquad members storm the gates open blasting confetti over bystanders.

I'd itch to dig up the corpse and set it on fire but I digress that to be too much, because the smell of burning weed would be FAR too much to handle. However I will say by the time we start to close out we will bring forth the shattered remains of his treasured Semper Fidelis knife. We sprinkle the hardened knife shards on the mess of dicks and grilled cheese like nuts on a sundae. The cherry. you may ask? His Desert Eagle gun.

After we're done, and everybody cheers us for our grand show, we pass out political activist pamphlets for abortion  and against welfare  , for we must educate America on how to prevent fucktards.

And thus, the first, and last Jace Connors convention. It would be the perfect spot for the first and last "Jace"-con, with major trolling celebrities welcome to come. The red carpet should definitely be rolled out for DeagleDad420 and Gamerfood. In the course of the main events, such as the "big speech", panels will be held by the likes of veterans trolling celebrities and "YOU WILL 9/11"  fags alike.

After all, if the endless supply of LULZ were to die, we have to make sure it goes out with a BANG!


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## Le Bateleur (Aug 7, 2014)

Some Poster said:
			
		

> Stuff about Chris



I kno rite? Chris brought this on himself from the moment he was an autistic sperm who just kept repeating the same over and over, always swimming forward because that's what autism makes you do. So he beat all the neurotypical sperm that stopped to enjoy their surroundings.



			
				some other poster said:
			
		

> Chris probably could succeed at something, a little bit



Hahaha no. Chris will always fail. I bet when Chris set his house on fire he was trying to make iced coffee using a Keurig icemaker. He got it wrong of course because he has a bent duck and DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS.



			
				 third random poster said:
			
		

> Chris will die alone



Don't you mean he'll die surrounded by the corpses of Snorlax and Patti and the cats in their LEGO sarcophago that he NEEDS MULTIPLES of and he's a grown man but isn't he just like thus Anime character?


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## Ariel (Aug 7, 2014)

CatParty said:


> JaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJaceJace
> -tyce gif-
> -tyce gif-
> -tyce gif-
> ...


BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! 
KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD!


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## José Mourinho (Aug 7, 2014)

chimpchan said:


> BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS! BAN ALL DADS!
> KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD! KATSU IS A SECRET DAD!


PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE


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## Ariel (Aug 7, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE PRESS ONE


PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO!


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## José Mourinho (Aug 7, 2014)

chimpchan said:


> PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO! PRESS TWO!


YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS!


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## Ariel (Aug 7, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS! YOU MESS WITH THE BULL, YOU GET THE HORNS!


STAINLESS STEEEEEEEL!


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 7, 2014)

chimpchan said:


> STAINLESS STEEEEEEEL!


*SEMPER FIDELIS MOTHERFUCKERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!*


----------



## Trombonista (Aug 7, 2014)

Pixyteri is fat and I would not have sex with her.

Also I wanna see Anna's tits.


----------



## Grand Number of Pounds (Aug 7, 2014)




----------



## Sexual Stallone (Aug 7, 2014)

No puede serrrrrr! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!


----------



## Mauvman Shuffleboard (Aug 7, 2014)

It seems post quality has actually decreased since the first thread, keep on pushing the limits of retarded fellers. 

But let's be serious for a second, who would ruin a child's life first, adoptive parents or a single mother? Adoption is a bureaucratic process rooted in passive aggression toward a child you can never really love and don't actually want but you just get to look hip or something (kind of like a tattoo except it disappoints you). On the other hand, single mothers don't have enough penises to ensure proper childcare and can't tell the difference between Bibleman and his sidekick Coats. I think the real solution is to send the child to a group home and make a documentary about it.


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Aug 7, 2014)

Chris stinks and is fat and shits himself and no one will have sex with him.

And he's fat.  Did I mention he stinks, too?


----------



## Roger Rabbit (Aug 7, 2014)

I was the hooker that went to Chris' house.


----------



## applecat (Aug 7, 2014)

Yes people I agree, but what if Chris was a pizza? What kind of toppings would he have?

Myself, I think he would have autism and failure.


----------



## Mauvman Shuffleboard (Aug 7, 2014)

If Chris was a pizza I would not have sex with him, and he should live in a group home with other autistic pizzas.


----------



## BALLZ-BROKEN (Aug 7, 2014)

wat if someone buzted a nut on crihs' glasses?


----------



## RetardBus (Aug 7, 2014)

What if Chris fought in World War II and his DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS were used as chemical weapons? Discuss.


----------



## applecat (Aug 7, 2014)

Mauvman Shuffleboard said:


> If Chris was a pizza I would not have sex with him, and he should live in a group home with other autistic pizzas.



I mean, I might be an autistic pizza myself but at least I have healthy things like spinach and anchovies as toppings! Chris is so fat he gives pizza a bad name.


----------



## Mauvman Shuffleboard (Aug 7, 2014)

applecat said:


> I mean, I might be an autistic pizza myself but at least I have healthy things like spinach and anchovies as toppings! Chris is so fat.


I too am an autistic pizza, but someone dabbed most of the fat off of me with a napkin (IT WAS A GIRL TOO, and I didn't even have to pay her). Chris is a cultural virgin fat pizza that isn't even delivery.


----------



## LM 697 (Aug 7, 2014)

re: spiders
[8:53:44 PM] Apple Cat: they were babies!
[8:54:11 PM] Holy Father Dukat: yeah well do you know what babies rhymes with?
[8:54:17 PM] Apple Cat: scabies?
[8:54:28 PM] Holy Father Dukat: and barb had scabies
[8:54:32 PM] Holy Father Dukat: and shes related to chris
[8:54:35 PM] Holy Father Dukat: so spiders are like chris


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Aug 7, 2014)

Mauvman Shuffleboard said:


> If Chris was a pizza I would not have sex with him, and he should live in a group home with other autistic pizzas.



Look how the pizza came out of the oven, shaped like a girl.


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 7, 2014)

Autism Friendly Night for Pizza


----------



## cypocraphy (Aug 7, 2014)




----------



## Dark Mirror Hole (Aug 8, 2014)

This thread is ILLEGAL and AGAINST THE LAW. Take it down IMMEDIATELY!


----------



## Watcher (Aug 8, 2014)




----------



## Joan Nyan (Aug 8, 2014)

Chris is gay autist and im not so im better die chris u not dabes leik catparty iz.


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 8, 2014)

*HOLY FUCKING SHIT GUIZE CHRIS POSTED ON FACEBOOK THAT HE'S GAY!*



Spoiler










*(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)*


----------



## spaps (Aug 8, 2014)

Spoiler: long



*Commando Script*




What's that?







Sounds like

the garbage man.







Oh. On Tuesday?







Maybe they changed

the schedule.







Oh, shit!







Whoa!







Wait a minute!







Wait a minute!

Hold it up, you guys.







I was afraid you'd miss me.







Don't worry.

We won't.







Now that

is American workmanship.







You think the Japanese

invented that? Bullshit.







We did. For a while,

we lost it, but we got it back.







I like Cadillacs.







Well, come around here, brother,

and get in this Cadillac.







You'll love it.

This is style and beauty.







Comfy, right? Oh,

I know what you're going to say.







That's vinyl,

but you don't want leather.







Leather's hot,

it's uncomfortable, it cracks.







Nothing but trouble.

Look at the head room.







Go ahead, start it up.

Listen to that.







That's power.

That's performance.







You know what

I like best?







What's that?







The price.







Hey! Wait a minute!







You can't drive

that car in here!







Whoa!







- Hey, guys, how's it going?

- What do you say?







Working, working.

You know.







Daddy, put me down!

Put me down!







I surrender!







Not me!







I love you, too.







Here come the sandwiches.







Why don't they just call him

"Girl George"?







It would cut down the confusi�n.







Oh, Dad, that's so old.







When I was a boy and rock'n'roll

came to East Germany,







the communists said

it was subversive.







Maybe they were right.







- What's in this?

- You don't want to know.







Dad, what's wrong?







What's that army helicopter

doing here?







You said you wouldn't

go away again, you were through.







I'm not going anywhere.







Promise?







I promise.







Jackson! Harris!

Secure the area!







John?







John, are you in there?







John, come on out.

It's Kirby.







I know.







Silent and smooth,

just like always.







- I better be. You taught me.

- I'm getting rusty.







What's going on?







- Jenny, how are you?

- Hi.







Jenny, I need

to talk to your dad, OK?







Yeah? Got a warrant?







Very funny.







- Jenny.

- OK.







John, we've got a problem.

Someone's killing your men.







You gave them

new identities.







There

must have been a leak.







Lawson, Forrestal, Bennett...

they've all been hit.







Who's doing it?







You've made enemies

all over the worid.







It could have been the Syrians,

the South Americans,







the Russians,

or a terrorist group.







They'll find you.







We were going to make

a normal life here.







You will, I promise.







I'm going to coordinate

with the federal people.







We'll nail those bastards

before they get close to you.







In the meantime, Jackson

and Harris will stay here.







Are they any good?







Real good, but not as good

as you were.







Is it bad?







I'm not leaving you,

if that's what you mean.







Then it can't be bad.







- How bad are you hit?

- I can make it.







I've got to get my rifle

from the shed.







Keep an eye out.

They'll be coming.







Get downwind. The air current

may tip them off.







Downwind? You think

I could smell them coming?







I did.







Jenny, you go to your bedroom

and stay out of sight.







I'll be right back.







- Where is she?

- Mellow out, man.







We can't talk business with you

waving guns in people's faces.







Your daughter's safe, Colonel.







Whether she stays that way

is up to you.







My people got business with you.







If you want your kid back,

then you better cooperate.







Right?







Wrong.







He's coming at us

with no brakes.







He's still coming,

the crazy bastard!







He'll hit us!







Shit!







Don't move, motherfucker.







Bennett, I thought you were...







Dead? You thought wrong.







Ever since you had me

thrown out of your unit,







I've waited to

pay you back.







You know what today is, Matrix?







Payday.







Tranquilizers.







I wanted to use the real thing!







Where is Jenny?







Do you remember me, Colonel?







I remember you, scumbag,







especially the people

you've tortured and killed.







Colonel Matrix,

you do not understand...







a country like Val Verde.







It is a country

that needs a president...







who has an understanding

of discipline.







Why tell me?







Because you're going

to return to Val Verde,







and you are going

to kill the president...







that you helped

to overthrow me.







Have Bennett do it.







Sounds like something

he'd get off on.







Because President Velasquez

trusts you, Colonel.







After all, he made you

the hero of the revolution.







Captain Bennett left,

shall we say, under a cloud.







Yeah. Because he enjoyed

killing too much.







Your training, Matrix.







You can get close

to President Velasquez.







You will kill him.







We went to a lot

of trouble to find you.







We had to pretend

Captain Bennett's death...







so General Kirby

would become agitated...







and lead us to you.







Now that I have you, you will do

exactly as I tell you.







Fuck you.







Daddy!







Jenny!







Oh, you bastards!







If you kill President Velasquez,

I will send her back to you.







If you try anything else,







I will mail her to you

in pieces.







Any sign of Matrix?







No, sir. Just those bodies.

You think there's more, sir?







If he's still alive,

I'd expect a lot more.







Sully will make sure

you get on the plane.







Henriques will stay with you,

make sure you get off.







I don't hear from

either one of them, she's dead.







How much they

paying you, Bennett?







They offered me a hundred grand.







You want to know something?







When I found it was you,

I said I'd do it for nothing.







- Hey, hold it!

- I'll be back, Bennett.







John!







I'll be ready, John.







We're running late, buddy.







So you and Bennett

met in the service?







Me and Henriques

is in the service, too.







Nothing like old war buddies.







Well, have a nice trip, now.







Take care.

Oh, here.







Have some beers in Val Verde.







It'll give everyone more time

with your daughter.







You're a funny guy, Sully.

I like you.







That's why I'll kill you last.







Move!







Hasta luego, fellas.







First class, a.







And you're b, sir.







Any carry-on luggage?







Just him.







Open your mouth again,

I'll nail it shut.







Fasten your seat belt, sir.







Thank you.







Could I have

a blanket and a pillow?







Sure.







- There you go.

- Thank you.







We're now preparing

for departure.







Please make sure

your luggage...







is safely stored

in the overhead compartments.







Fasten your seat belts

and extinguish all cigarettes.







Once we reach

our cruising altitude,







we'll be serving

complimentary beverages...







and then our dinner.







After that, we'll be showing

our feature film.







Your flight attendants are

Susan and Lance, and I'm Debbie.







We're here to make

your trip comfortable.







Have a safe

and enjoyable flight.







Excuse me.

How long is the flight?







We land in Val Verde

in hours.







Thank you.

And do me a favor...







Don't disturb my friend.

He's dead tired.







Upright, please.

Thank you.







Sir, during takeoff,

you must remain seated.







I'm airsick.







Yeah, the bird has flown.

The cargo's aboard.







Now go to the drop-off point.







Yes. Gracias, Sully.







We are right on schedule.







With any good fortune,







today will be my last day

as a civilian.







Your father seems

to be cooperating.







You will be together

with him soon.







Won't that be nice?







Not nearly as nice as

watching him smash your face in.







Take her below.







Yeah!







Well, my : flight

to Vancouver was canceled.







So, how about dinner?







Yeah.







I could go to bed early, too.







- Maybe another time.

- Sounds like he's mad at you.







OK. Well, I like you, too.







All right.

Talk to you soon. Bye.







Love and careers. It's tough.

Sounds like you need a date.







Well, I don't.







Giris like you meet

a lot of nice boys at airports.







Listen, you're really

bugging me.







Hey!







Hey, slow down.







- I got something to give you.

- I'm not interested.







You don't know

what you're missing.







It looks like a nightmare.

Please leave me alone!







You fucking whore.







Don't move.

I'm not going to hurt you.







- Step aside.

- You said, "Don't move."







Do it. Get in the car.







Ah!







Ah!







Do exactly what I tell you.







- I've got a : karate class.

- You're not going to make it.







Follow him.







I knew you would say that.







Don't get offended, but are you

going to kill me or something?







No.







You wouldn't tell me

if you were.







- Sure, I would.

- Really?







Trust me.







Stay close to him. Faster!







That's good.







Can you tell me

what this is about?







A guy I trusted for years

wants me dead.







I've only known you minutes,

and I want you dead, too.







Out. Come on.

Hurry up.







- Lf you're in a hurry, I can...

- I'm almost through with you.







Listen to me.

My daughter has been kidnapped.







He's the only chance I've got

of finding her.







If he sees me or I lose him,

they'll kill her.







I need you to follow him,

tell him you're crazy about him.







Bring him over here.

I will do the rest.







You go back to your normal life.

Got it?







- No.

- Please, help me.







You're the only

chance I've got.







She has less

than hours left.







They're going to kill her.







OK. All right. I'll help you.







There's this huge guy outside

in a green t-shirt.







He's a paranoid maniac,

and he's kidnapped me.







I need your help.







- I'll check it out.

- Thank you.







I hear you're great

with transmissions.







That's right.







Oh, yeah.

This will work just fine.







Biggs, are you there?







There's a guy over here

that may be wacko.







- I doubt I can handle him alone.

- I'll be there.







Want to see me kick ass?







- Wait here, miss.

- Thank you.







Attention all units.

Emergency on the theater level.







Suspect, ' ", brown hair.







He's one gigantic

motherfucker.







This used to be a great place

for hunting slash.







It's got crowded now.







I think I found

something, though.







See you.







- What are you doing here?

- I'm waiting for my...







Hey, you looking for me?







Come with us.







Eh!







What?







Matrix.







I need a quarter.

Give me a quarter!







Move it!







Son of a bitch!







- Out of the way.

- Freeze!







Aah!







Get him!







Come on.







- Stop or I'll shoot!

- No!







Hey, lady! Stop!







Wait for me!

Don't you go anywhere!







Who the hell are you, huh?







You steal my car,

rip the seat out, kidnap me,







you ask me to help find your

daughter, which I kindly do,







then you get me in a shoot-out

where people are dying.







You rip a phone booth

out of the wall,







swing from

the ceiling like Tarzan,







then a cop's going to shoot you,

and I save you,







and he starts chasing me!







Are you going to tell me

what's going on or what?!







No.







No? No?







Oh, my god! Watch out!







What are you doing?







Oh, look out! Aah!







This is not my day!







Whoa!







Whoa!







My car!







Aah!







- Are you all right?

- I'm dead.







You're all right.

Wait for me.







Where is she?







- Kiss my ass.

- I can't hear you!







I'll say it louder:

Get fucked.







Your loyalty is very touching,







but it's not the most important

thing in your life right now.







But what is important

is gravity.







I have to remind you, Sully,

this is my weak arm.







You can't kill me.







You need me

to find your daughter.







Cook knows.

I'll take you where I meet him.







- No, you won't.

- Why not?







Because I already know.







Remember I promised

to kill you last?







That's right, Matrix.

You did!







I lied.







Aah!







Now you don't have a car.







Now I do.







- What did you do with Sully?

- I let him go.







Andale!







I'm sorry

I got you involved.







Tell me

what this is about.







- It's about her.

- Is this your daughter?







People are using her

to force me to do a job.







If I don't get to her soon,

they'll kill her.







- Did you do the job?

- No.







They would kill her

even if I did it.







Our only chance

is to get to her...







before they find out

what I'm doing.







All that matters

to me now is Jenny.







Let's go. Out!







Stay put.







- What are you doing?

- Helping you get her back.







- Check the drawers.

- All right.







It's Cook.

Mess up the bed.







Act like you had

a good time with Sully.







Look at this.







All right.







Yeah?







- Where's Sully?

- In the shower.







- Who are you?

- Room service.







Open the door.







Move over there.







Hey, Sully!







Oh!







Aah!







You scared, motherfucker?

Well, you should be.







This Green Beret's

going to kick your big ass.







I eat Green Berets

for breakfast,







and right now

I'm very hungry.







I can't believe

this macho bullshit.







Fuck you, asshole.







Fuck you, asshole.







These guys eat

too much red meat!







Ah!







Where is she?







Cook!







Let's go.







This must be Cook's car.







Let's search it.







I think

I found something.







Look at this.







What is this?







Coastal is a fuel depot

that supplies planes.







To whom, the airlines?







Usually smaller,

private aircraft.







Are you sure?







This is where my

flight instructor gets his fuel.







There are a lot of warehouses

on Pecondo Street.







Harris must be keeping

a plane there.







Let's go.

We'll take Cook's car.







He won't be needing it.









This is it.

Patria Enterprises.







This is where I was

this afternoon.







Go this way

and wait for my signal.







Cindy? Come on.







I've seen all the equipment,

but there's no airplane.







What about your daughter?







Harris and Bennett

aren't here.







She's wherever they are.







OK. Look at this.







These coordinates are

somewhere near Santa Barbara.







Longitude...







There's something going on

at this island north of here.







This must be where

they've taken Jenny.







Look, here's a photo

of an amphibian airplane.







- Maybe they use it to fly there.

- Let's look at that invoice.







Type fuel is amphibian.







gallons would fly this plane

to the island and back.







But it isn't here.

I've seen everything.







It was refueled at pump station

Pacific Pier.







That's San Pedro.







- How long to fly to the island?

- About two hours.







- Are we going to the plane?

- Not yet.







- Where are we going?

- Shopping.







Shopping?







Come on. Come on!







Wow!







- What's that?

- Rocket launcher.







Go!







Freeze! Don't even think

about it!







- Stick him in the truck.

- Come on. Come on.







If you call

General Franklin Kirby,







he will explain everything.







Kirby, huh? I think

we ran him in last week.







Hey.







Hooker.







Not bad.







- What's she doing?

- She's got something for us.







I bet she does.







Shit!







What the hell was that?!







Jesus Christ!







- Where did you learn to do that?

- I read the instructions.







What time do you expect Matrix

to arrive in Val Verde?







Just over two hours.







Do you think he's

going to give us any problems?







He'll do exactly as

he's told...







as long as he thinks

he'll get his daughter back.







- It's all clear.

- Good. OK, go.







Ah!







Did anybody ever tell you

you have a lot of hostility?







Come on. Let's move.







I hope I can fly

this plane.







Oh, shit!







Oh!







- Oh, no!

- What's wrong?







This isn't a plane.

This is a canoe with wings.







- Then get in and start paddling.

- Oh!







Start the engine! Hurry!

OK, OK.







- This plane's older than I am!

- Come on!







There's no L.E.D. Read-out!







I've only trained on a Cessna.







- Hurry up!

- I'm trying!







Shit!







Oh!

Come on, piece of shit!







Fly or die!







Works every time.







All right.

Here we go.







- Watch out for the boat!

- We're not going to make it! Ah!







- Yes, we are.

- Aah!







Oh.







We did it. We did it.







Wow!







Well done.







Thank you.







- Matrix?

- Call the federal building.







Have them monitor every police,

aviation, and marine channel.







- What are you expecting?

- Worid War III.







Repeat: This is Whiskey X-ray

for General Kirby.







Urgent you respond.







Attention

unidentified aircraft.







This is the Coast Guard

cutter Marauder.







You're flying over

the San Magill gunnery range.







This is a highly

restricted area.







Change course or you will be

forced to land. Acknowledge.







Urgent. Repeat, urgent.







You must contact

General Franklin Kirby.







First change course or you risk

being shot down. Acknowledge.







They shoot the shit

out of this area all the time.







Flights out of LAX

avoid it like the plague.







- Can you go below radar?

- Not marine radar.







If I get us close to the water,

the waves can camouflage us.







- Go down.

- Oh... OK.







- Do it!

- Hang on.







We lost them, sir.







Slitting a little girl's throat

is like cutting warm butter.







Put the knife away,

and shut your mouth.







I love listening to

your little piss-ant soldiers...







trying to talk tough.







They make me laugh.







If Matrix was here,

he'd laugh, too.







Mr. Bennett,

my soldiers are patriots.







Your soldiers are nothing.







Matrix and I could kill

every one of them...







in a blink of an eye.

Remember that.







Are you trying to frighten me?







I don't have to try.







When Matrix finishes the job,

he'll be back for his daughter.







Now, whether she's alive

or dead doesn't matter.







Then he'll be after you.







Now, the only thing

between Matrix and you...







is me.







It is you that is afraid,

Mr. Bennett.







You are afraid of Matrix.







Of course. I'm smart.







But I have an edge.

I have his daughter.







- Is that it?

- That's the one.







Land here. It's the most

isolated spot we'll find.







OK. Here we go.







You remember the message?







Commando. Kirby.







Code red. Coordinates.

Got it.







Don't break radio silence

until they see me.







How will I know?







Because all fucking hell

is going to break loose.







Be careful, Matrix.

Good luck.







Thanks.







Mira.







Si. El presidente aqu�.







He was not on the plane.







Kill her.







Como esta?







Alto!







Aah!







Welcome back, John.

So glad you could make it.







Little bitch!







I'll kill her!







Yah!







Commando!

I say again, Commando!







This is Whiskey X-ray .







I have an emergency message

for a General Franklin Kirby.







I repeat,

General Franklin Kirby.







General Kirby, we have

your message on the teletype.







Disparen!







Paren disparando!







Vayan y miren.







Ah!







Aah!







Venganse conmigo!







Aah!







Aah!







Jenny!







Jenny!







Jenny!







Daddy?







Jenny!







Daddy?







Daddy?







Jenny!







Daddy?







Aah!







No, not daddy.







Come on!







Daddy.







Aah!







John? How's your arm, John?







Come find out.







No, thanks.

Think I'll take a pass.







John, stick your head out.







One shot

right between the eyes.







I'll make it quick

for old times' sake.







Stop screwing around

and let the girl go.







It's me you want.







I have one arm.

You can beat me.







Come on, Bennett, throw away

that chicken-shit gun.







You don't just want

to pull a trigger.







Put the knife in me

and look me in the eye...







and see what's going on

in there when you turn it.







That's what you

want to do, right?







- I could kill you, John.

- Let the girl go.







It's between you and me.







Don't deprive yourself

of some pleasure.







Come on, Bennett.

Let's party.







I can beat you.

I don't need the girl.







I don't need the girl!







Ha! I don't need

the gun, John.







I can beat you.







I don't need no gun!







I'm going to kill you now!







Ha!







Daddy.







You're getting old, John.







You're getting old.







Eeeah!







Eeeah!







Aaah!







John, I feel good.







Just like old times.







What's it feel like to be

a dying man, John?







You're a dead man, John.







Bullshit!







John, I'm not going to shoot you

between the eyes.







I'm going to shoot you

between the balls!







Ah...







Let off some steam,

Bennett.







Daddy.







Move out!







- Leave anything for us?

- Just bodies.







I'd like you to start up

your unit again, John.







All it would take

is your coming back.







This was the last time.







Until the next time.







No chance.


----------



## Watcher (Aug 8, 2014)

Spaps did you really post the entire script to Commando?


----------



## spaps (Aug 8, 2014)

Cuddlebug said:


> Spaps did you really post the entire script to Commando?


Yes.


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 8, 2014)

*WARNING: DO NOT OPEN THIS SPOILER*



Spoiler


----------



## LM 697 (Aug 8, 2014)

You know what I like best?


----------



## Foulmouth (Aug 8, 2014)

CompyRex said:


> You know what I like best?


 
Tits ?


----------



## Sweet and Savoury (Aug 8, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> *WARNING: DO NOT OPEN THIS SPOILER*
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler



Holy hells, you weren't joking.


----------



## The Dude (Aug 8, 2014)

What if Chris was an adviser to President Obama?


----------



## BT 075 (Aug 8, 2014)

The Dude said:


> What if Chris was an adviser to President Obama?



He'd paint the White House black and use his blood to cure homosexuality.


----------



## c-no (Aug 8, 2014)

What if Chris was a Pokemon?


----------



## Ariel (Aug 8, 2014)




----------



## exball (Aug 8, 2014)

What if Chris was an airplane and Catparty was a train and they went on crazy adventures? Discuss.


----------



## Foulmouth (Aug 8, 2014)

What if chris ate some smelly fish ?


----------



## CWCissey (Aug 8, 2014)

What if Chris was found to not be autistic?


----------



## Ariel (Aug 8, 2014)

CWCissey said:


> What if Chris was found to not be autistic?


That's gay and unrealistic.


----------



## NavierStoked (Aug 8, 2014)

What if 2008 CWC met present day CWC? What would the CWC of old think of the current CWC?


----------



## CatParty (Aug 8, 2014)

applecat said:


> Yes people I agree, but what if Chris was a pizza? What kind of toppings would he have?
> 
> Myself, I think he would have autism and failure.


----------



## Dark Mirror Hole (Aug 8, 2014)

What are Chris's thoughts on the gold standard? Do you think he'd like to research dianetics? I bet he probably would hate metaphysics. But he probably faps to string theory. So what do you people think?


----------



## Da Pickle Monsta (Aug 8, 2014)

What if Chris and Cole both became detectives and were each other's partners in some sort of cop buddy comedy-drama?  Would we call it Toy Story 3 Hard or Autism Hour?

What if Chris and Pixiteri switched bodies?  

What if Chris woke up tomorrow and found out that he was the main character is somebody else's Fallout 3 game?  Would he nuke Megaton or save it?  Would he even get out of the Vault?  Discuss.


----------



## applecat (Aug 8, 2014)

Chris would get out of the vault but he would burn it down with a Keurig first.


----------



## The Knife's Husbando (Aug 8, 2014)

Personally, I think we should lock Chris and Jace in a bank vault for a weekend.


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Aug 8, 2014)

Foulmouth said:


> What if chris ate some smelly fish ?



His panties would be indistinguishable from Pixyteri's.


----------



## The Dude (Aug 9, 2014)

Queen of Tarts said:


> His panties would be indistinguishable from Pixyteri's.



Fuck you for making me think about either of their panties.


----------



## JarlaxleBaenre (Aug 9, 2014)

Any thread with rage-essays.


----------



## cypocraphy (Aug 9, 2014)

What if Chris did the walk of life?


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 9, 2014)

My favourite trolling plan: Let's roll Cole Smithey in a carpet and throw him off a bridge.


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Aug 9, 2014)

What if Pixyteri slime-slid down Chris' supposedly not bent anymore and much larger duck?


----------



## exball (Aug 9, 2014)

What if Chris was a cat?


----------



## cypocraphy (Aug 9, 2014)

Queen of Tarts said:


> What if Pixyteri slime-slid down Chris' supposedly not bent anymore and much larger duck?



I'm really hard after reading that.


----------



## applecat (Aug 9, 2014)

exball said:


> What if Chris was a cat?


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## Watcher (Aug 9, 2014)

(_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅м̅a̅я̅i̅j̅u̅a̅n̅a̅_̅_̅_̅ () ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้ด้้้้้็็็็

______█████████
______█▄█████▄█
______█▼▼▼▼▼█
_____██▌_______██▌
______█▲▲▲▲▲█
______█████████
_______██_____██
╲┏━┳━━━━━━━━┓╲╲
╲┃◯┃╭┻┻╮╭┻┻╮┃╲╲
╲┃╮┃┃╭╮┃┃╭╮┃┃╲╲
╲┃╯┃┗┻┻┛┗┻┻┻┻╮╲
╲┃◯┃╭╮╰╯┏━━━┳╯╲
╲┃╭┃╰┏┳┳┳┳┓◯┃╲╲
╲┃╰┃◯╰┗┛┗┛╯╭┃╲╲


----------



## QueenMegan (Aug 10, 2014)

what if sonichu testicles were on the outside


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 10, 2014)

exball said:


> What if Chris was a cat?


If Chris was a cat, Barb would be a fatter cat as well, I would take Chris and Barb in, but let them stay with me on one condition.

Chris and Barb would have to be my outdoor freak show attraction. 

Like, they would have spend all day and all night locked in cage , behind a curtain.

I would stand on a soapbox, wearing my finest top hat and, ringmeister get up yelling "Hurry hurry hurry! Step right up! Come and feast your eyes on the biggest freaks ever to grace mother nature! The DIVINE GALLERY OF HORRORS The human SNORLAX and the FAT AUTISIC MANBABY!"


And I'd charge $25 per entry. An additional $5 and Chris would draw commissioned artwork for anything the commissioning patron demands. And if Chris doesn't comply, I would politely refund the money, and discipline Chris after the show with a plank of plywood.

I would feed them chicken scraps, and water them daily.

But yeah, off-topic though, but Cole just burying the past and trying to make the best out of his life is so much more horrible  than what I'd do. At least I would make a lot of money off the A-Logs and JULAAAY fags, and there are a lot of A-Logs and JULAAAY fags so I'd make a lot of money.


----------



## Ariel (Aug 10, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> If Chris was a cat, Barb would be a fatter cat as well, I would take Chris and Barb in, but let them stay with me on one condition.
> 
> Chris and Barb would have to be my outdoor freak show attraction.
> 
> ...


Brilliant!


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 11, 2014)

The Knife's Husbando said:


> Personally, I think we should lock Chris and Jace in a bank vault for a weekend.


That'll be a great idea.  As a matter of fact, I would be a master troll if I had the chance.

I mean, Chris's house just burned down , he's like out on the streets, therefore, he is vulnerable and ripe for trolling again. Putting him in a bank vault makes it much easier.

I don't know what my heroes, Clyde, Liquid, or Bluespike are thinking right now, but if I were in a bank, you'd bet your ass that I would iron up my pickle suit, put on my finest Guy Fawkes mask, and head outside my apartment with my trusty hidden camera in hand, to interview Chris and engage in a "deal."


I would be all:

"Hey Chris! It's me! The Man in the Pickle Suit!  I'm here because I heard your house burned down! Aint that a damn shame(not that I had anything to do with it). Welp, the folks at the fine Cwcki and myself are offering you an ultimatum. You see Chris, we trolls are truly, the only fans you ever had. No one ever loved your stuff, kids fucking think your stupid, the videogame industry would rather ignore your shit ideas, and no girl would ever go out with a FAT FUCK like you, especially now considering you have no money... But we, while hate hated you, we kept coming back for more because we loved your antics and your public humiliations, and child like world view. It is at that point where hate became love, and love became obsession, and that obsession became a complete archive of you and all your comics and artwork, which brings us to the deal. We will print out hard copies of your comics, seeing that we are the only ones who have copies left, and we will give back the license to Sonichu, seeing that we have it, but ONLY if you do two things for us. Number 1, you must confess on camera the TRUTH of your so-called loss of virginity. If you really lost your virginity, then you must send us proof of such virginity lost. You must introduce to us your lady friend. Find her, and have her confess with you and the deal is sealed. Otherwise, IT DIDN'T FUCKING HAPPEN. Number 2 you must then proceed to turn around, pull your pants down, bend over, and let me fuck you in the ass, and while I fuck you in the ass, you must scream "XBOX ONE IS BETTER THAN PS4. I'M A MICROSOFT FANBOY AND I WANT TO SUCK BILL GATE BIG FLACID DICK!"

Chris would either accept the ultimatum, or refuse in the most hilariously, over-the-top, TARD RAGE fashion, and I would secretly get it on camera.Jace would be sitting in the bank vault watching us in fear while he goes into a beautiful rage too.

   Either way, it would be cocks. Much lulz saturated glorious cocks.   

*(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)*


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 13, 2014)

GODDAMN I FUCKING HATE FEMINISM AND AS A MRA WHO USES AN ANIMU GIRL AVATAR IT'S SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS TO HAVE A *WAR *WITH THEM ON TWITTER. 

 AND I'M GLAD TO BE BACK TO SPERG ABOUT THEM BECAUSE OF THE FUCKING TYPHOON. YOUR HAPPY DAYS ARE OVER, FEMINISTS AND SJWS. 

tl;dr *DIE FEMINISTS!*


----------



## Sexual Stallone (Aug 13, 2014)

Is good to know that #$wag has become mainstream in the forums


----------



## applecat (Aug 13, 2014)

If you had to cook and eat Chris, what recipe would you use?


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 14, 2014)

applecat said:


> If you had to cook and eat Chris, what recipe would you use?








Also, what if Chris sucked Sonichu's balls?


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Aug 14, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> Also, what if Chris sucked Sonichu's balls?



What if?  Psht, we know that fucker does in secret.


----------



## Trombonista (Aug 14, 2014)

What if Rosechu had a vagina?


----------



## c-no (Aug 14, 2014)

Alan Pardew said:


> GODDAMN I FUCKING HATE FEMINISM AND AS A MRA WHO USES AN ANIMU GIRL AVATAR IT'S SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS TO HAVE A *WAR *WITH THEM ON TWITTER.
> 
> AND I'M GLAD TO BE BACK TO SPERG ABOUT THEM BECAUSE OF THE FUCKING TYPHOON. YOUR HAPPY DAYS ARE OVER, FEMINISTS AND SJWS.
> 
> tl;dr *DIE FEMINISTS!*


I'm eating a sandwich, Feminist.


----------



## Da Pickle Monsta (Aug 15, 2014)

trombonista said:


> What if Rosechu had a vagina?



Then she'd be Sonichu.


----------



## Dark Mirror Hole (Aug 15, 2014)

What if Chris was a canned condom?


----------



## Le Bateleur (Aug 15, 2014)

Chris isn't really a transsexual lesbian! It's a plan to attract lesbian girls.

Chris isn't really a fatty! It's a plan to attract cannibal girls!

Chris isn't really balding! It's a plan to attract short-haired girls.

Chris didn't really sell anything on eBay! It's a plan to attract eBay-using girls.


----------



## applecat (Aug 17, 2014)

What if you had to rate Chris with the new likes system?

Myself, I would rate him Autistic.


----------



## spaps (Aug 17, 2014)

applecat said:


> What if you had to rate Chris with the new likes system?
> 
> Myself, I would rate him Autistic.


I'd rate him Optimistic to show my support of his homosexuality.


----------



## Foulmouth (Aug 18, 2014)

I hate chris becos I am so much better than him,he should die in a helicompter crash and blow up and catch fire and fall off a bridge. He makes Hitler look good.
I may be a mean old drunk but I rarely shit my pants and when I do I do something !
Die chris I hate you.
(also jace is gay)

EDIT - I really should have put this in discussion.


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 18, 2014)

Hey guize, I'm gonna compare any retard I know to Chris  so I think that lolcow in the first picture is gonna be the next Chris. Here's my reasons:

1. Their hair colour are similar.
2. They're retards.
3. He made fun of me for being a retard so I'm gonna photoshop him ;_;  He's gay.
4. He's gay.
5. He's gay.
6. He's gay.
7. He's gay.
8. He's gay.
9. He's gay.
10. He's gay.


----------



## Dr. Mario (Aug 18, 2014)

*This* thread. Because it brings all of the worst threads in the whole forums.


----------



## Le Bateleur (Aug 20, 2014)

Hey guys. I've just registered but I've been lurking since the eBay saga 

Here is my questionnaire about Chris that I want you all to take.

1. When did you first start ruining Chris' life?
2. Were one or both of your parents nasty to you when you were young?
3. Why do you pick on Chris? jealousy/he's defenceless/your own autism
4. How grateful are you to me for bringing this to your attention?


----------



## exball (Aug 24, 2014)

This


----------



## Foulmouth (Aug 25, 2014)

Well he could share them…. He goes to a number of restaurants including Old Country Buffet? By the way… as to the whole DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS deal…. I know Chrissy puts his undies with shit in them in the laundry area… but does barb scrape the shit out? or force chris to do it? Does she just put his briefs in, shit and all, along with the rest of her laundry? Also on the subject, anyway we could buy bob’s clothing from them? Or did they sell it to good will?


----------



## Dark Mirror Hole (Aug 25, 2014)

Would you take a colonoscopy photo of Chris's colon? What would it look like?


----------



## Dilbertmann (Aug 25, 2014)

Dark Mirror Hole said:


> Would you take a colonoscopy photo of Chris's colon? What would it look like?



Shit. Lots and lots of shit.


----------



## Trombonista (Aug 25, 2014)

Dilbertmann said:


> Shit. Lots and lots of shit.


You're supposed to clean out the colon before a colonoscopy. It's not fun.


----------



## Queen of Tarts (Aug 25, 2014)

If Chris and Jace mated, what type of buttbabies would they make?


----------



## applecat (Aug 25, 2014)

trombonista said:


> You're supposed to clean out the colon before a colonoscopy. It's not fun.



Look, I think we all know by now that Chris and Barb do not clean.


----------



## Morbid Boredom (Aug 27, 2014)

I went out and did something, and I didn't shit myself once!

So, I'm better than Chris.


----------



## Watcher (Aug 27, 2014)

Hey guiz

I think we need an emoticons system put in.

I know such a system is completely radical and I'm an exceptional enough individual to come up with it, but I really do think Null should drop everything he's doing and start coding this bad boy up.

Whadda ya say?


----------



## José Mourinho (Aug 31, 2014)

Hello forum. This is a thread for retards to discuss their retardism . Are you a retard? If so, why? Were you always? Is it driven by the pastor faggot or the Muslims?

In my case I just never had an inclination to try cooking a grilled cheese sandwich  . I have no problem with those who does it whether in your kitchen in your very own fine home or in a virtual game. It's just not for me. I cook too much and have a bit of a compulsive personality. I say compulsive not addictive because for example if I cook too much of it I keep getting these overpowering urges to cook it again instead of one at the time. I've gotten better about it over the years, but when I was younger (including the age at which I had my own money and could buy whatever I wanted to parkour around in the mall *LOOK AT ME MOM WOOOO!*) it was hard to control.

I figured that with such a personality I'd be a retard all the time if I started cooking. Therefore I decided to just not bother with it. So that lead to two things:

1) I was always the retard. This got me a lot of friends! The area I lived at the time either by law or by custom (not sure really) always gave me free Deagle guns and sometimes free Soap fan art for being the retard of a large group of people.

2) People often teased me/pressured me to play vidya. That sucked. I turned to my fantasy world of The Sims where I battled those slanderous peer pressure trolls and the pastor faggot until I showed the world that retardism was true and honest. Ok that part is a lie *IT IS A REAL GAME YOU GAMERS*, but the first thing is true: peer pressure sucked *PASTOR FAGGOT SUCKED ASS*. Ironically I since moved to a state which is likely the dryest in the US and it got even worse. Then I moved to a state full of Muslims and it stopped COMPLETELY. People here say things like "oh you don't drink? That's cool. You're better off anyway." *I SHOWED THEM OFF LIKE WHAT I DID IN POSTAL 2* *TAHAAA*

So with that I close this thread with my favorite story of being a retard.

In this case I didn't set out to be a retard. It was my friend's 17th birthday party. A bunch of us were over there including my friend who I will nickname Mr T. Mr T really liked the grilled cheese sandwich. A lot. So much that he cooked some more in his kitchen. People were quite upset that he was refusing to hand keys over. Finally he gave me the keys and told me to drive him and his 3 week old car over to my place so he could crash for several hours before driving himself home. So while driving him home, we are on the interstate going about 70 mph when he feels the urge to puke. So he throws the passenger car door wide open and starts hurling red wine puke everywhere including all over the inside of his car. (None on me thank goodness.) Of course I'm busy swerving to avoid his door hitting anyone. Disregard that, the cooking is so intense we burned down the house. Needless to say that was not really a good experience.

Oh, and when we got to my place he got out and told my mom to send me to church service for about 3 minutes, too.


----------



## exball (Aug 31, 2014)




----------



## Le Bateleur (Sep 1, 2014)

I'm right and you are all white knights and menimists.

This post was given 1,389 likes, 345 users agreed with this post and the poster was given the "Pls Post Moar" trophy.


----------



## Morbid Boredom (Sep 1, 2014)

Absinthe said:


> I'm right and you are all white knights and menimists.
> 
> This post was given 1,389 likes, 345 users agreed with this post and the poster was given the "Pls Post Moar" trophy.


But you didn't say whether or not you shat yourself!  You must have, so I'm better than you!


----------



## Dr. Meme (Sep 1, 2014)

CHRIS IS DATING A MAN. BECAUSE HE'S GAY AHAHA.
THAT'S THE JOKE


----------



## Male (Sep 1, 2014)

itd be pretty neat if chris throat is slit and then immediately sewn back and hes bleeding and crying but he isnt dead. then i punch him in his fat nose twice and kick him in the head and hes still crying but he isnt dead. then i tape barb's left femur, ribcage, and ankle skin to chris' chest and set his arms on fire. then i nailgun him to a heavy wooden board and pretend that hes dead and i ignore him for a few minutes and then he calls for help and i retaliate by shoving burnt candles down his throat.
then i loudly talk about his parents death which makes him cry. then i call up the crimson executioner from that one film and he tortures chris for a bit, but chris isnt dead.then his stomach caves in and hes barely awake so i hit him in the head with a 1000 pound sledgehammer, but hes still alive. then i insert a habitrail tube up his butt and it leads to his right ear, and so he shits in the tube which is motorized and shoots his poop up his ear. then hes blinded by one of barb's teeth that i tore out, but hes still alive. then i make chris into a pancake and gorilla glue bobs neck, left leg, and eyeballs to chris' shins and spit on him and call him gay and make a funeral pyre and pour liquidized meth down his nostrils and


----------



## Dollars2010 (Sep 1, 2014)

What if killer birds banded together to kill Chris? Discuss.


----------



## Male (Sep 1, 2014)

Hunger Mythos said:


> What if killer birds banded together to kill Chris? Discuss.


Chris gets eaten when he tries to dig up patti


----------



## Dollars2010 (Sep 1, 2014)

Male said:


> Chris gets eaten when he tries to dig up patti


Patti is a piece of shit and deserves to die along with Tuna. They can both rot in hell and eat icecream off the floor while the killer birds kill them.


----------



## Trombonista (Mar 31, 2015)

Let me preface this by stating that I like the idea of fucking dogs.

Noble is the rapist
How sacred is he who breaks women's legs

There have been so many shitty posts in the past few months that this thread needed to be necro'd.


----------



## Coldgrip (Mar 31, 2015)

Well, the only reason you think that is due to your non-neanderthal dna. I can tell from the shape of your skull you must be one of those Japanids or possibly a Tyranid, it's hard for me to tell because my deformed skull which was caused by environmental factors (like me running face first into parked cars and meth). I've taken to correcting this facial deformity by shoving inflatable pool toys into my nasal cavity.


----------



## Conrix (Oct 22, 2015)

What if Chris was circumcised?


----------



## Pocoyo (Oct 23, 2015)

Conrix said:


> What if Chris was circumcised?



He already is.


----------



## exball (Oct 23, 2015)

What if Chris had two pairs of pants?


----------



## The Lizard Queen (Oct 23, 2015)

"What if Chris had a furry inflation scat fetish? (With pics)"


----------



## Bertram (Oct 23, 2015)

Pocoyo said:


> He already is.


What if Chris wasn't circumcised? Would his duck be longer and straighter than previously photographed? Did a botched circumcision bend and shorten Chris's otherwise magnificent duck?


----------



## MalWart (Oct 23, 2015)

What if Chris worked at Chili's?


----------



## John Furrman (Oct 24, 2015)

MalWart said:


> What if Chris worked at Chili's?


What if chris worked?


----------



## Pocoyo (Oct 24, 2015)

Bertram said:


> What if Chris wasn't circumcised? Would his duck be longer and straighter than previously photographed? Did a botched circumcision bend and shorten Chris's otherwise magnificent duck?



Maybe this will answer your question.


Spoiler


----------



## BILLY MAYS (Oct 24, 2015)

What if Chris read a Chuck Tingle book?


----------



## Trombonista (Oct 24, 2015)

What if Chris was an intactivist?


----------



## ToroidalBoat (Oct 24, 2015)

Guys, what if Chris gets sued for copyright infringement?


----------



## MalWart (Oct 24, 2015)

What if Chris went on a cruise?


----------

