# What are some of the GOOD things that are because of the Corona Virus?



## Jmz_33 (Mar 14, 2020)

For starters, I now get to see my family that I almost never get to see.


----------



## JULAY (Mar 14, 2020)

Lots of Boomers are finally going to die.


----------



## The Last Stand (Mar 14, 2020)

Some tourist spots are empty and/or greatly reduced. More space for us. 

Extended Spring Break.


----------



## Pedosnake (Mar 14, 2020)

Getting some time off from work, without actually taking vacation.


----------



## Neko GF (Mar 14, 2020)

I have a valid excuse to not leave the house.


----------



## WhoBusTank69 (Mar 14, 2020)

China is falling apart.


----------



## Pinot Pierrot (Mar 14, 2020)

My environmentally-conscious brother was very pleased to note that China's air pollution output plummeted to the likes no one has ever seen in decades (though this is obviously temporary).


----------



## Wheezy Asthmatic (Mar 14, 2020)

I can buy stocks.

I can. But that doesn't mean I will lol I like the option though


----------



## Inflatable Julay (Mar 14, 2020)

There will probably be fewer tweakers on the street


----------



## Mediocre (Mar 14, 2020)

Cheap flights, I am too scared to book one tho and end up being Jew'd by not being given a refund but a useless 1 year 'voucher' that you can use to re-book the flight.


----------



## b0o0pinsn0o0tz (Mar 14, 2020)

Being an extra hermit will give me time to paint 40k minis.


----------



## The best and greatest (Mar 14, 2020)

Mediocre said:


> Cheap flights, I am too scared to book one tho and end up being one of Trump's Chosen People'd by not being given a refund but a useless 1 year 'voucher' that you can use to re-book the flight.


Thinking that airline will still exist in that amount of time?


----------



## James Howlett (Mar 14, 2020)

My commute has gone from an hour to about 20 minutes. We should have a pandemic every month.


----------



## Enola Straight (Mar 14, 2020)

Local businesses in my area are so desperate they are offering amazing sales.


----------



## Stephanie Bustcakes (Mar 14, 2020)

It's fun to freak people out by going to public places and start coughing a lot, especially if you notice people getting scared, in which case you start getting as close to them as you can and continue coughing and watch them scream and run away.


----------



## Slimy Time (Mar 14, 2020)

We may get some Lolcow Coronavirus sagas. Jack Scalfani, DSP, any of the death fats. Will be a fun watch.


----------



## betterbullocks (Mar 14, 2020)

I told myself I'm gonna exercise a ton over the break while I have easier/more comfortable access to workout stuff, and I'm actually doing it. Now that break is indefinite, I'm gonna get in great shape


----------



## Dyn (Mar 14, 2020)

Dead boomers.


----------



## The Pink Panther (Mar 14, 2020)

A view of finally seeing what people would act like in a hypothetical apocalypse.


----------



## ⋖ cørdion ⋗ (Mar 14, 2020)

The fact a lot of workplaces are gonna realize people can work from home just fine.


----------



## Your Weird Fetish (Mar 14, 2020)

Gas is now going for prices I haven't seen since the 90's.


----------



## MrTroll (Mar 14, 2020)

Nobody's eating Chinese food anymore so restaurants are becoming fronts for prostitution. You can get a really good deal on a hooker who doesn't speak English right now.


----------



## betterbullocks (Mar 14, 2020)

Back at home I actually have a really nice piano, not the shitty community one I usually play on. I just got a thick new piano book, so I'm poised to learn some great new pieces in crystal clarity


----------



## The best and greatest (Mar 14, 2020)

Dyn said:


> Dead boomers.


Some of the nicest people I know are old people, frankly I'd rather the virus kill their waste-of-space 30-something-going-on-40 progeny that all treat their parents like garbage even though their parents are way nicer and more giving and valuable to society.


----------



## Dyn (Mar 14, 2020)

The best and greatest said:


> Some of the nicest people I know are old people, frankly I'd rather the virus kill their waste-of-space 30-something-going-on-40 progeny that all treat their parents like garbage even though their parents are way nicer and more giving and valuable to society.



ok boomer


----------



## Token Weeaboo (Mar 14, 2020)

All the people who post memes about wanting to die may get a chance.


----------



## Pineapple Fox (Mar 14, 2020)

Cheap flights! Take that dream vacation you could never afford while plane tickets are cheap.


----------



## Agent Abe Caprine (Mar 14, 2020)

Some ISPs are letting their customers have unlimited data.


----------



## sasazuka (Mar 14, 2020)

Unexpected week-long plus extensions on assignments that were due next week.


----------



## LargeChoonger (Mar 14, 2020)

I am Lord Asspaper and am free to mark up prices on my private toilet paper stash as much as I want


----------



## Figger Naggot (Mar 14, 2020)

The infrastructure for any future pandemics will be set up.


----------



## Lina Colorado (Mar 14, 2020)

1)Gasprice is low.
2)People are actually pretty nice to eachother. It took a chinese virus to bring us closer together(so to speak).


----------



## Lost send help (Mar 14, 2020)

I can finally catch up on all of those films, tv and games I was planning to watch/play.

I’m now hoping streaming services will drop prices to compete cos all we’re gonna be doing is watching Netflix for the next few months.


----------



## Niggernerd (Mar 14, 2020)

Woke tards proving they're not racist by going near sick chinamen in the US. Even if it's highly unlikely they'll die because age they'll still get perma lung damage which is fine by me.


----------



## Gatdam Animal Person (Mar 14, 2020)

Schools are closed, so if you're in dire need for a break from all these books, you're in luck!


----------



## Vault Boy (Mar 14, 2020)

The optimistic thought that some corporations might consider local manufacturing to avoid the shortages caused by this virus.

It'll weaken the Chinese government, and bring some jobs back to the states. Wouldn't that be a dream come true...


----------



## DelicateMageflower (Mar 14, 2020)

Catching up on my reading.


----------



## heathercho (Mar 14, 2020)

Dyn said:


> Dead boomers.



Imagine the amount of Abos that will die. They don't have a good lifespan normally, but if they get Corona-Chan? Their petrol huffing days are over. 
Finally, a good plague to rub out the weakest of humans.

Outside of that, it's made me realise who I can and can't trust - if someone is reacting like a moron to this (stockpiling), are a doomtard or they're easily conned by Facebook memes, then they can't be trusted. Also people who want to install laws that take away individual rights cannot be trusted. People who are using this as a political cudgel on either side, can also get fucked.


----------



## Shield Breaker (Mar 14, 2020)

Slimy Time said:


> DSP



How would the guy who never leaves the house get the plague?


----------



## Slimy Time (Mar 14, 2020)

Shield Breaker said:


> How would the guy who never leaves the house get the plague?


His horse brings it back. Or maybe his parents are really dying this time dood.


----------



## BSC (Mar 14, 2020)

Catch Your Breath said:


> I can buy stocks.
> 
> I can. But that doesn't mean I will lol I like the option though



In a similar vein, bitcoin is now at about half the price that it was a month ago.  Now would (probably) be a great time to buy if you're into that sort of thing.  I know I'm definitely going to.


----------



## JambledUpWords (Mar 14, 2020)

Roads aren’t as congested and I feel safer crossing the street 
It made me realize more than ever how important food storage is (luckily my family is already in the habit of storing food) 
Touching my face less = better skin 
Despite the panic, I know I have people that support me 
More money in savings since I won’t be going out as much


----------



## Shield Breaker (Mar 14, 2020)

Slimy Time said:


> His horse brings it back. Or maybe his parents are really dying this time dood.



That would require them to spend time together.


----------



## mr.moon1488 (Mar 14, 2020)

I get to do this unironically, and in real life.


----------



## GhostOfTheCrinoids (Mar 14, 2020)

I am forced to clean my house because I'm stuck in it.


----------



## MrWhoDat (Mar 14, 2020)

Not hearing about Greta or other climate activists


----------



## 737 MAX Stan Account (Mar 14, 2020)

Didn't have to hear a single peep about black history month, hopefully Nurgle pozzes all the fags before pride month.


----------



## MerriedxReldnahc (Mar 14, 2020)

My workplace closed and will stay that way until the end of spring break ( not good) but that means I have a ton of time to do art crap, I can get lots of skateboarding/working out done, and the waterfront should be pretty dead so that will be fun to spend time at. And God willing all the cyclists are staying home so I don't have to dodge those fuckers.


----------



## Kiwi Lime Pie (Mar 14, 2020)

Aberforth said:


> Some ISPs are letting their customers have unlimited data.


With our state closing K-12 schools for the next 3 weeks and requesting that they switch to online/distance learning models for those weeks, an ISP has announced they will give low-income families $10/month unlimited internet access for however long the school shutdown lasts. It goes to show much of a markup the full regular prices are.

The biggest positive here has been I've had the chance to catch up on things that I haven't been able to do simply because of a lack of time.


----------



## FuckedUp (Mar 15, 2020)

Getting to semi-live the NEET life because all my classes are going to be online for the rest of the semester, and the housing/dining costs are going to be refunded. Hopefully this shit also kills off retarded mandatory attendance policies going forward.

Also might make a fortune if the $500 I dumped in crypto yesterday goes anywhere.


----------



## queerape (Mar 15, 2020)

Shitty governments are being exposed for what they are


----------



## Quarantine (Mar 15, 2020)

Entertainment value! Looking forward to at least a few scammers/munchies claiming to have COVID-19. Twitter types may also start using “vulnerability to coronavirus” as the latest axis of oppression to argue and/or e-beg about. Maybe there’ll be some entirely new cows.


----------



## Smaug's Smokey Hole (Mar 15, 2020)

Border control! It shows how important it is to be able to secure the borders and that is making some people very uncomfortable right now.


----------



## Ted_Breakfast (Mar 15, 2020)

The good thing is that once it blows over I can put on a Batman outfit, wear a toilet paper medallion around my neck and and mock everyone for their overreaction to it, generally making an ass out of myself like Squidward after Santa didn't show.


----------



## Wish I knew (Mar 15, 2020)

Watching all the soy filled consoomer events like E3, GDC, and Comic Con getting cancelled in real time thus saving everyone from cringe worthy speeches and general dissapointment


----------



## JethroTullamore (Mar 15, 2020)

MerriedxReldnahc said:


> My workplace closed and will stay that way until the end of spring break ( not good) but that means I have a ton of time to do art crap, I can get lots of skateboarding/working out done, and the waterfront should be pretty dead so that will be fun to spend time at. And God willing all the cyclists are staying home so I don't have to dodge those fuckers.


Theres nothing I hate more than adults on bicycles.  

Assuming we’re still allowed to travel domestically, I’m actually looking foreword to my flight in April for once, I assume almost no one is going to be on that plane.  
Unobstructed access to the bathroom, all the legroom I want, drinks.....lots and lots of drinks......


----------



## Guts Gets Some (Mar 15, 2020)

I came back to here today. Realizing life is too short to dick around and I need to try something.


----------



## Fireman Sam (Mar 15, 2020)

I can play S.T.A.L.K.E.R in real life.
I also have an excuse to buy vodka.


----------



## Enola Straight (Mar 16, 2020)

Rip Van Dinkle said:


> Local businesses in my area are so desperate they are offering amazing sales.


The cases in my state have doubled since the last post, and they are expecting more because some infected cuntnugget went through a major airport in one of our largest city from Italy recently.
*THOSE PRICES JUST KEEP GETTING LOWER! *


----------



## Doctor Placebo (Mar 16, 2020)

People keep saying dead boomers.

Let's not forget the dead red Chinese.





Has /pol/ not made a rom hack of Hong Kong 97 that replaces Chin with Corona Chan? Because if not, someone needs to get on that.


----------



## Iuz (Mar 16, 2020)

I don't have to hear sports conversations at work.

Even better, there is barley anyone on the same floor of the office anymore.


----------



## FluffyTehFennekin (Mar 16, 2020)

NO SCHOOL!!


----------



## FuckedUp (Mar 16, 2020)

Not sure if it's still a good thing, but I was thinking I'd have an advantage with graduate school admissions this year due to the dearth of Chinese applicants. Though now with every American university switching online halfway through the semester I'm afraid I'm going to be fucked over too because admissions officers will (rightfully) think it was ultimately easier to ace the four CS classes I'm taking this particular semester than when other applicants took them. 


FluffyTehFennekin said:


> NO SCHOOL!!


Found the underage fag.


----------



## JustFuckinaDude (Mar 16, 2020)

Spoiler: Powerlevel



My daughter was born last month, and I get to spend time with her, rather than going to school. My wife appreciates my availability to help out as well.


A. My exams are online, so I can cheat easily; however, my clinical rotations are still a go.
B. I'm getting to buy at one hell of a dip, so when everything goes back to normal, I'm expecting great returns.
C. My gym is empty, which is fantastic.
D. It's finally sunk in that it's time to stop relying on China for everything.
E. People don't want to socialize anymore, and I'm okay with that.


----------



## cypocraphy (Mar 16, 2020)

No jury duty for me this week, and they can't get me again for at least 3 years. Praise be unto you, oh great coronavirus.


----------



## JULAY (Mar 16, 2020)

big baby jesus said:


> No jury duty for me this week, and they can't get me again for at least 3 years. Praise be unto you, oh great coronavirus.


If you ever want to get out of jury duty (for criminal trials) just tell the attorneys during voir dire that you know that cops are paid professional liars, and that you will automatically disbelieve any testimony by a cop regardless of what it is. Defense attorney will get a raging hard on and want you on the jury, but you'll be the first person the prosecution strikes.


----------



## Token Weeaboo (Mar 16, 2020)

You have any idea how much ANIME you can watch while you're out of work? Out of school?
Citation; username


----------



## lurk_moar (Mar 16, 2020)

Student loans don’t have interest until further notice. Orange man good.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 16, 2020)

My job is still going on but we're closed to the public so we'll just be chilling and shit. If they do tell us to stay home we get paid administrative leave. Also this has made my family appreciate how I prep for stuff like this and don't see me as a crazed gun nut like before. Now I'm a sensible gun nut!

But kidding aside, even my anti-gun sis is now asking her husband to teach her how to handle a gun. Not even the hurricanes in Houston could get that out of her.



JULAY said:


> If you ever want to get out of jury duty (for criminal trials) just tell the attorneys during voir dire that you know that cops are paid professional liars, and that you will automatically disbelieve any testimony by a cop regardless of what it is. Defense attorney will get a raging hard on and want you on the jury, but you'll be the first person the prosecution strikes.


Also you could say you hate minorities and the police arrested them so they must be guilty.

It's funny because it's true!


----------



## augment (Mar 16, 2020)

It's awfully quiet outside now. I'm no shut-in but I appreciate silence.


----------



## vaporubber (Mar 16, 2020)

The parents of my students will finally be able to see how lazy and useless their children are. Once they see that the dumbasses are unable to do even the simplest tasks without EXTREME hand-holding, they will finally be unable to blame teachers for the bad habits they’ve instilled in their kids. It will be all their fault, and they’ll have no choice but to face that ugly truth.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 17, 2020)

vaporubber said:


> The parents of my students will finally be able to see how lazy and useless their children are. Once they see that the dumbasses are unable to do even the simplest tasks without EXTREME hand-holding, they will finally be unable to blame teachers for the bad habits they’ve instilled in their kids. It will be all their fault, and they’ll have no choice but to face that ugly truth.


You'd think that but they'll do mental gymnastics and blame you somehow. Idiots breed idiots and lazy people raise lazy people.


----------



## Mrs Paul (Mar 17, 2020)

I don't have to worry about when my library books are due.


----------



## DDBCAE CBAADCBE (Mar 17, 2020)

I get to be smug for once and point out that I've been stocking up on food and other supplies for years to people whining about the lack of toilet paper and food.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 17, 2020)

Mrs Paul said:


> I don't have to worry about when my library books are due.


Yup, Austin Public Library apparently is renewing EVERYONE for 3 more weeks even if you are maxed out.


----------



## Itachi Uchiha (Mar 17, 2020)

When faced with a small apocalypse-like situation, getting to see all those 2013 zombie apocalypse "survival experts" in reality just panic and by a bunch of ass-wipe.


----------



## DocHoliday1977 (Mar 17, 2020)

Just having fun watching everyone being retarded over toilet paper.


----------



## FuckedUp (Mar 17, 2020)

vaporubber said:


> The parents of my students will finally be able to see how lazy and useless their children are. Once they see that the dumbasses are unable to do even the simplest tasks without EXTREME hand-holding, they will finally be unable to blame teachers for the bad habits they’ve instilled in their kids. It will be all their fault, and they’ll have no choice but to face that ugly truth.


I wish I could've had a teacher who used Kiwi Farms. 


big baby jesus said:


> No jury duty for me this week, and they can't get me again for at least 3 years. Praise be unto you, oh great coronavirus.


Shit, I just realized I have jury duty in May. Does this greatly increase my chance of actually being put on a trial considering all the court dates presumably pushed back?


----------



## LolRaccoon (Mar 17, 2020)

I'm not going to be alone nearly as much and I'll see my family.


----------



## Dante Alighieri (Mar 17, 2020)

JULAY said:


> If you ever want to get out of jury duty (for criminal trials) just tell the attorneys during voir dire that you know that cops are paid professional liars, and that you will automatically disbelieve any testimony by a cop regardless of what it is. Defense attorney will get a raging hard on and want you on the jury, but you'll be the first person the prosecution strikes.






FuckedUp said:


> Shit, I just realized I have jury duty in May. Does this greatly increase my chance of actually being put on a trial considering all the court dates presumably pushed back?



All you have to say is "jury nullification" and you're home free.


----------



## Hux (Mar 17, 2020)

The traffic to and from work is significantly better


----------



## Matthew216 (Mar 17, 2020)

A reintroduction to the value of board games.


----------



## FuckedUp (Mar 17, 2020)

Token Weeaboo said:


> You have any idea how much ANIME you can watch while you're out of work? Out of school?
> Citation; username


Yeah, I'm doing that right now for the first time since like 15. I picked JoJo because I keep hearing people talking about and memeing it, and 20 episodes in it's pretty...I don't know. Better than the elder 9001+-episode ones for sure, but 90% of it is still boring as fuck "oh shit the enemies are even more powerfuler than the previous ones [for the scene they're introduced]". The only reason I keep watching is because his tricks and shit are actually pretty creative.



LolRaccoon said:


> I'm not going to be alone nearly as much and I'll see my family.


That's actually a negative for me because I'm immature, but to each their own.


----------



## Idiotron (Mar 17, 2020)

Air pollution has dropped drastically all over the world, especially in China and the US.
That's great news, gives me a little hope for the future.
One could even come to a conclusion that all this is a scam by governments to decrease air pollution.
If that's the case, I'm OK with it.


----------



## Beluga (Mar 17, 2020)

I've been reading and spending a lot of time with my dogs.


----------



## PumpkinSpiceBitchMeringue (Mar 17, 2020)

No traffic on the ride to work.


----------



## tasty humane burger (Mar 17, 2020)

Personally:
- I have an excuse not to see people I don't particularly like who are insistent that we 'catch up' over expensive coffee at some crap hipster cafe just because we live close to one another.
- I put a request in to work from home and it is likely to be granted. If not, I am able to do as much overtime as I like in the main office. 
- I was going to be graded on a presentation at uni, and I get awful nervous when public speaking. We are now submitting a written piece of work instead.


----------



## augment (Mar 17, 2020)

Look I'm not saying this as a refugee from another shitty forum, but using the outbreak as an excuse to justify your already misanthropic behavior isn't the best alternative.


----------



## Godzilla1984 (Mar 17, 2020)

DanteAlighieri said:


> All you have to say is "jury nullification" and you're home free.


Another alternative is to say that you have heard about the case and that you have already made up your mind about it.


----------



## ForgedBlades (Mar 17, 2020)

Babylon Bee articles.









						Italy Totally Fine Thanks To Universal Healthcare
					

ITALY—A new report has found that Italy is doing completely fine with no problems whatsoever thanks to its lauded universal healthcare system.As the coronavirus pandemic continues to sweep the world, countries are going on lockdown, but not Italy. Its universal healthcare program means that...




					babylonbee.com
				












						Drug Cartels Switch To Producing Hand Sanitizer
					

MEXICO—Drug cartels across Mexico and all around Central and South America have announced they are ceasing production of heroin, meth, and cocaine, saying they are now producing a far more lucrative drug with the street name of "hand sanitizer."Drug cartels are quickly converting their assembly...




					babylonbee.com


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (Mar 17, 2020)

I get to sleep in more.


----------



## Jonah Hill poster (Mar 18, 2020)

Lack of sporting events will make people focus that life doesn’t always have to be about sports, or celebrity worship; even if it is only for a few months.


----------



## Sundae (Mar 18, 2020)

Here's a handy little list:


----------



## Mr. Skeltal (Mar 18, 2020)

Personally it's like I get a second honeymoon with my wife alongside being able to pursue my hobbies. 
It's also spurred an interest in pickling techniques in me, I have some onions pickling right now in malt vinegar (Colonial/British recipe) alongside some kraut that's going sauer. 
I will need to go out and restock on peppers at some point, I pickled some around Christmas that I've been chipping away at.
I pickled serranos last time  a bit spicier than jalapenos, hot little fuckers, though I might try Hungarian wax peppers this time if I can find them.

Also laughing at the culinary brainlets that raided the bread aisle at my local supermarkets, true men can bake their own bread.

If this goes on for long enough I may be able to get back into oil painting and that excites me.

On a bigger scale it may kill off some people hoarding property. Corona-chan is already causing a market correction so I expect housing to fall in line with the rest of the economy when the dust settles. States with aging populations often have housing shortages, so if Corona-chan is the Boomer Remover then there will be some space opened up for young families again. But that's a razor thin silver lining on a very dark cloud.

Stay safe out there Kiwis, don't let them coof on you.


----------



## Marissa Moira (Mar 18, 2020)

I spent the first few days being anxious that work would just can us. Then after confirmation that it's probably not happening I decided to read the first discworld book and it starts out saying "Terry Pratchett was born in 1948 and is still not dead".

So that's how long it's been since I've read an actual book and not technical manual or some sort of reference literature.


----------



## Basketball Jones (Mar 18, 2020)

I get to cook for my boyfriend a lot more since we aren’t working on different shifts. Now we’re both home at the same time and awake at the same time so that’s been nice.
We have some home projects we get to work on also, and it’s given me an excuse to pursue some interests I’ve had for a bit. 

A friend of mine is getting to spend well-needed time at home and is taking the time to catch up on work, finish her own projects she keeps putting off, and spend time with her cat. She called me today and said she is going to turn this whole thing into something positive for herself.


----------



## Tour of Italy (Mar 18, 2020)

Maxliam said:


> But kidding aside, even my anti-gun sis is now asking her husband to teach her how to handle a gun. Not even the hurricanes in Houston could get that out of her.



I have a feeling this is going to cool the momentum in the gun control movement considerably. Late 2019 and early 2020 were already record breaking periods in terms of new purchases and March 2020 is set to blow even those out of the water.

I’m very happy to see people finally realizing that there are legitimate reasons to own a gun. Even better, people in restrictive states are seeing what a hassle it is to actually get their hands on one, even if it’s just borrowing a gun from a friend.


----------



## Battlecruiser3000ad (Mar 18, 2020)

It's very easy to rile people up whenever you desire to be a dick.


----------



## The Un-Clit (Mar 18, 2020)

Trolling the fuck out of people by simply walking close to them.  Maybe coughing into the air if that's not good enough.   Fuck our species is such sheep.


----------



## YourMommasBackstory (Mar 18, 2020)

A lot of online businesses offer their service for free due to quarantine. I’ve never was into movies so I’ll pass online cinema, but I got few free online courses.
One is about c# from a university of a nearby city so I even can add it‘s diploma to my degree for extra points, plus my thesis mentor advised to use programming in thesis to make it more original. Second one is on Python. finally I’ll fully understand coding in Yanderedev’s thread.
Sure I could found an info about those languages online, but sometimes it’s better to have structured course.


----------



## Roast Chicken (Mar 18, 2020)

Currently in a coffee shop I like to haunt. Some of their food is 50% off, I'd imagine because not as much is selling. There are 10 people in here atm.


----------



## lurk_moar (Mar 18, 2020)

I have no jury duty, lots of job security, possible overtime, no hours cut, and how fucking good I have it.

Bad things my profession is still not recognized. Lab testing personnel are NOT nurses. Nurses may draw blood, but they DON’T test body fluids or specimens. We have the same education level as a nurse (associates and bachelors degrees) but different skill sets and knowledge base.


----------



## Yoghurt Baby (Mar 18, 2020)

1) cheap gas. 
2) easy for me to meet my 'connection quota' at my shitty retail job because everyone loves complaining about covid
3) dont have to breath the same air as the gross neckbeard fatties at my tech school because no in-person classes


----------



## From The Uncanny Valley (Mar 18, 2020)

Gas is cheap, and everything feels kinda peaceful


----------



## Longjack Attack (Mar 18, 2020)

Near empty roads and less traffic.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Mar 19, 2020)

I've been farting on bums and no SJW types are nearby to complain about it or take/ post pictures of me lifting my leg.


----------



## Doug_S1 (Mar 19, 2020)

I have a plump, juicy hemorrhoid which feels like a beetle. Also I don't have to go outside.


----------



## StyrofoamFridge (Mar 19, 2020)

I've been seeing a lot of my slightly left leaning friends approve of Trump's handling of the `Coronavirus` Chinese flu. Subsequently, a lot of the Berniebros are vowing to refuse to vote for Biden.


----------



## LordofTendons (Mar 19, 2020)

StyrofoamFridge said:


> I've been seeing a lot of my slightly left leaning friends approve of Trump's handling of the `Coronavirus` Chinese flu. Subsequently, a lot of the Berniebros are vowing to refuse to vote for Biden.



My lifelong democrat mother was screaming at the TV "I'M WITH TRUMP!" yesterday. The reporters at the daily White House press conference were asking stupid questions about them calling the virus kung flu instead of corona. After her faux outrage about his "grab em by the pussy" comments and all that other nonsense in 2016, it was glorious.


----------



## 2021Murder (Mar 19, 2020)

MrTroll said:


> Nobody's eating Chinese food anymore so restaurants are becoming fronts for prostitution. You can get a really good deal on a hooker who doesn't speak English right now.


Lol what state you live in? You would think they would have massage parlors there. Also few of the asian slaves working as hookers in thos country are attractive in the slightest


----------



## Battlecruiser3000ad (Mar 19, 2020)

Maybe now even those who didn't do so before will see that EU is incompetent and useless organization and we'd be better off if it died.


----------



## Tour of Italy (Mar 19, 2020)

LordofTendons said:


> My lifelong democrat mother was screaming at the TV "I'M WITH TRUMP!" yesterday. The reporters at the daily White House press conference were asking stupid questions about them calling the virus kung flu instead of corona. After her faux outrage about his "grab em by the pussy" comments and all that other nonsense in 2016, it was glorious.


A working class, left leaning family member
has been watching the conferences and said “well at least he’s got a really sharp team around him” which surprised me.

My jaw hit the floor when she went on to say “that Pence though, he’s a smart guy, he’s really impressed me when he chimes in”.

Biden’s fucked. How can you win against the guy who sent everyone free money?


----------



## Shrekking Crew (Mar 19, 2020)

Ghost-town environment makes it a lovely place to walk around and experience true solitude in all its glory.
No one barging into offices to which they don't belong. 
No smelly neets touching shit that isn't theirs.
Being able to tell people to fuck off to keep social distancing.


----------



## Mike R (Mar 19, 2020)

James Howlett said:


> My commute has gone from an hour to about 20 minutes. We should have a pandemic every month.


This. Most of the idiots have finally gotten off of my roads.



vaporubber said:


> The parents of my students will finally be able to see how lazy and useless their children are. Once they see that the dumbasses are unable to do even the simplest tasks without EXTREME hand-holding, they will finally be unable to blame teachers for the bad habits they’ve instilled in their kids. It will be all their fault, and they’ll have no choice but to face that ugly truth.


If only. Stupid people don't see how stupid and useless their kids actually are.



Mrs Paul said:


> I don't have to worry about when my library books are due.


I remember when there used to be libraries. Wait, there are still libraries?


----------



## MrTroll (Mar 19, 2020)

Tour of Italy said:


> Biden’s fucked. How can you win against the guy who sent everyone free money?



Run on a platform of sending everyone twice as much money as Trump did, then call him President Cheapskate at the debates.


----------



## James Howlett (Mar 19, 2020)

Mike R said:


> This. Most of the idiots have finally gotten off of my roads.
> 
> 
> If only. Stupid people don't see how stupid and useless their kids actually are.
> ...



 Ironically, my office closed today, but I'm able to work from home. That means the commute went from 20 minutes to _less than 20 seconds._

I love you Corona-chan! Come back anytime!


----------



## Mr. Skeltal (Mar 19, 2020)

Tour of Italy said:


> A working class, left leaning family member
> has been watching the conferences and said “well at least he’s got a really sharp team around him” which surprised me.
> 
> My jaw hit the floor when she went on to say “that Pence though, he’s a smart guy, he’s really impressed me when he chimes in”.
> ...


My mother has voted blue for a long while, but even she admitted that Trump's handling of this situation is good.

I'm going with reserved optimism for Trump's reelection prospects, he'll do fine if his support base comes out to vote. Biden is not just a gaffe machine, he's a doddering senile gaffe machine. He's only been able to get this far because of name recognition ("isn't that guy Obama's VP? I'll vote for him!"), the media correcting his flubs in quoted transcripts, and the fact that he's the least unpalatable candidate on offer during this primary.
He has no platform aside from ORANJ MAN BAD and boomerisms about malarkey.

Corona-chan doing dirty dancing in the streets only strengthens Mr. Trump's chances. He's been as transparent as I would expect for an event of this magnitude. Response times did leave something to be desired, we don't need the Madagascar Protocol, but going full Sweden YES isn't good either.
Biden, unlike Trump, has the open borders albatross on his shoulders that he'll have to reconcile with the fact that a plurality of people are going to be more skeptical about open borders, globalism, and lax immigration policies after Corona-chan runs her course.
Trump, on the other hand, can not only say that he fought for the wellbeing of the American people, but lambast open border/globalist types for allowing this kind of risk vector in to begin with.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 19, 2020)

Kinda related to my new job.


Tour of Italy said:


> A working class, left leaning family member
> has been watching the conferences and said “well at least he’s got a really sharp team around him” which surprised me.
> 
> My jaw hit the floor when she went on to say “that Pence though, he’s a smart guy, he’s really impressed me when he chimes in”.
> ...


He was going to lose but this certainly guarantees it.



MrTroll said:


> Run on a platform of sending everyone twice as much money as Trump did, then call him President Cheapskate at the debates.


It'll look like this to people:









Mr. Skeltal said:


> My mother has voted blue for a long while, but even she admitted that Trump's handling of this situation is good.
> 
> I'm going with reserved optimism for Trump's reelection prospects, he'll do fine if his support base comes out to vote. Biden is not just a gaffe machine, he's a doddering senile gaffe machine. He's only been able to get this far because of name recognition ("isn't that guy Obama's VP? I'll vote for him!"), the media correcting his flubs in quoted transcripts, and the fact that he's the least unpalatable candidate on offer during this primary.
> He has no platform aside from ORANJ MAN BAD and boomerisms about malarkey.
> ...


Corona-chan has really hit the democrats hard. They are damned if they do and damned more if they don't. If they do pass this emergency bill that gives everyone neet bucks, it'll be trumpeted as a Trump thing and means that they worked with him. If they don't, they will look like they are being petty dipshits who don't care about your working class voter. Trump didn't have to do much to put them over a barrel on this one.


----------



## Pee Cola (Mar 19, 2020)

This video, because Big Clive.


----------



## Niggernerd (Mar 20, 2020)

The fact that once this blows over globalization is fucking done for and China will get hit extremely hard for covering this whole shit up. God. It's gonna be glorious seeing our competitor burn down and the bonus is it's a commie regime.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 20, 2020)

Niggernerd said:


> The fact that once this blows over globalization is fucking done for and China will get hit extremely hard for covering this whole shit up. God. It's gonna be glorious seeing our competitor burn down and the bonus is it's a commie regime.


I honestly hope this brings back American factory work for people. I honestly am willing to pay more to mean that there's food on the table for my fellow Americans. It will hopefully also make people realize how little they need to get by instead of just being mindless consumers.


----------



## Juan But Not Forgotten (Mar 20, 2020)

This.


----------



## Overcast (Mar 20, 2020)

Reading this thread has definitely made me feel better about this whole coronavirus thing.

Turns out all we needed was an angry little virus to get the world back on track.

Anyway, working at a grocery store, we're getting a lot more business, which in turn means more job security for me. Also I get to call out people for not washing their hands after leaving the stall.


----------



## Guts Gets Some (Mar 20, 2020)

I've been seeing the word "coofs" used a lot. And it always makes me laugh.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Mar 21, 2020)

Guts Gets Some said:


> I've been seeing the word "coofs" used a lot. And it always makes me laugh.


Oh shit nibba I'm coofin' 


I'm happy to continue to be an asshole unabated and people are laughing too


----------



## polonium (Mar 21, 2020)

We've had to postpone our wedding because a lot for family are coming from overseas, but the venue offered us a date at a much nicer time of year for the same price.


----------



## Ilikeoreos (Mar 21, 2020)

I've been getting home from work alot earlier because of the reduced traffic and stuff.


----------



## Wraith (Mar 21, 2020)

Stronk lib feminist scuzzball wywmen who never needed no average man with average jobs now realizing for about five seconds they 100% rely on them to eat and wipe themselves, ya know, survive.


----------



## Vault Boy (Mar 21, 2020)

Niggernerd said:


> The fact that once this blows over globalization is fucking done for and China will get hit extremely hard for covering this whole shit up. God. It's gonna be glorious seeing our competitor burn down and the bonus is it's a commie regime.


That's all well and good, but the real positive of globalization's collapse would be it pissing Moviebob off some more.

After all, this is the same asshole who thought he'd have a robot body and a spaceship if Hillary won back in 2016.


----------



## Fatcat (Mar 21, 2020)

I was able to get my hands on a small game called Art Sqool for free, the creator made it a free download for 48 hours


----------



## Ow The Edge (Mar 21, 2020)

I finally decided to go ahead and get that Mossberg 88. My local gun stores are as busy as I've ever seen them.


----------



## Dysnomia (Mar 21, 2020)

The bars, diners and state stores being closed have led to a nice decrease in the amount of riff raff and broken bottles around here. There's less trash in the street. And once the closure mandate kicks in on the 23rd the hair stores will close. That's more of a personal lulz for me considering how many we have in a close radius. How much fake hair do you need?  

There are always wigs and extensions all over the sidewalk. Looking forward to seeing less of that.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Mar 21, 2020)

The confused old codgers who shop at my local store dropped more money than usual in their panic so I got more fun stuff to go with my supplies


----------



## emo goff (Mar 21, 2020)

Public properties and transports are being cleaned and sanitized for probably the first time in their existence.


----------



## Rice Is Ready (Mar 21, 2020)

I have a box with like 200 unwatched horror movies I'm digging into.


----------



## Return of the Freaker (Mar 21, 2020)

I would say the fact that this has allowed pollution levels in various parts of the world to (temporarily) drop and animals to come out, but too many normies on facebook are spinning it as misanthropic "we are the real virus" shit.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 21, 2020)

Return of the Freaker said:


> I would say the fact that this has allowed pollution levels in various parts of the world to (temporarily) drop and animals to come out, but too many normies on facebook are spinning it as misanthropic "we are the real virus" shit.


We kind of are a virus....



Ow The Edge said:


> I finally decided to go ahead and get that Mossberg 88. My local gun stores are as busy as I've ever seen them.


Oddly in my area it's not really that packed but this being Texas, most people own a shit load of guns and ammo.


----------



## Dave. (Mar 22, 2020)

To put it optimistically, we’ve been long overdue for a ‘renaissance’ type event for a while and we may yet have a proper catalyst for once. No more favoritism of corporations, now the industries will have to be built by the people who are willing to endure the hardship and have the passion.


----------



## smallmilk (Mar 22, 2020)

Tbh I have to admit I'm kind of glad we got a pandemic instead of ww3 like we memed at the beginning. No one is safe from viruses.


----------



## Club Sandwich (Mar 22, 2020)

my shop's stagnate inventory is moving, altered operations means money changing hands which means i stay in business and my employees keep getting paid, et c. there's also the unfortunate "smug" that comes from being able to see some people that you _know_ were told to take disaster preparation seriously, et c.

it's not quite schadenfreude, since i do feel bad they're effectively paying a premium for what would ordinarily be fairly cheap supplies, but at the same time most of these people were the "it's just a flu" or "we need open borders" types...

also there's an amazing number of take out / pick up places around that i never heard of, so that's pretty interesting. most restaurants and food trucks have converted over to mobile meal service and grocery deliveries for grocers. interesting changes to business and seeing formerly busy metro areas practically empty is almost surreal.


----------



## FuckedUp (Mar 22, 2020)

The aftermath of this has amazing potential.

Government reactions (e.g. lockdowns) could have accelerationist effects Brenton Tarrant couldn't dream of. Literally forcing people in their homes for *weeks* on end? There could even be a social libertarian movement that I could legit get behind; I'm 20 years old, perfect age for that kind of stuff to be going down.

This could also very well have reverse-9/11 effects on fearmongering.

Rainbows go below. None of this shit will probably happen because I've been wrong about literally everything (save for the actual deadliness of the disease).


----------



## Yoghurt Baby (Mar 22, 2020)

I thought of some more positives, because if I just focus on the negatives I'm going to wanna rope myself before this is all over.

1) more time spent with my pets. My cat is loving the amount of attention shes getting. Usually my weekdays are 14 hours away from home so I dont get to see her a lot.
2) can finally finish my finger tats now that I dont have to worry about working while they heal and fucking them up.
3) I've never been so productive with keeping up with the dishes and laundry.


----------



## Kiwi Lime Pie (Mar 22, 2020)

Ilikeoreos said:


> I've been getting home from work alot earlier because of the reduced traffic and stuff.


I've noticed that there's less traffic on the main road I use to and from work with each passing day because I don't have to wait nearly as long to turn on or off of it.

Today, I had to pick up something from a place that's normally a 35-40 minute drive during the day. Traffic on the freeway was lighter than it's ever been, resulting in a 25 minute drive each way.


----------



## JambledUpWords (Mar 22, 2020)

Fur cons are cancelled 
Troons can’t get surgeries to mutilate themselves 
ISIS terrorists are too worried about Corona-Chan to attack people 
Carbon emissions from China are lessened 
More people are aware of why open borders are a bad idea


----------



## Overcast (Mar 22, 2020)

The grocery store I work at has increased our pay by $2 for the next four weeks. Plus, if you do get sick from the virus, they'll still pay you.

Puts me in a bit more of a relaxed state of mind and really makes me feel motivated to do a good job.


----------



## ToroidalBoat (Mar 22, 2020)

It's a reminder how badly Americans handle disasters (like panic-buying), which could be a motivation to- oh who am I kidding...

People get time off or get to work from home more?


----------



## A Grey Cat (Mar 22, 2020)

Supposedly everyone's who's a us citizen and paid/filed taxes is gonna get a thousand bucks next month and the one after...maybe even for the next six months and you don't even have to have unemployment insurance or a tugboat to get it


----------



## None More Black (Mar 23, 2020)

it's been funny seeing a lot of morons on social media realizing they have absolutely no redeeming qualities after being at home with no one but themselves for 2-3 days straight


----------



## Pee Cola (Mar 23, 2020)

Some new material from Nick Frost and Simon Pegg.


----------



## Fougaro (Mar 23, 2020)

Corona-chan gave us QueenOfPole's catchy theme song.


----------



## Freya (Mar 23, 2020)

FuckedUp said:


> The aftermath of this has amazing potential.
> 
> Government reactions (e.g. lockdowns) could have accelerationist effects Brenton Tarrant couldn't dream of. Literally forcing people in their homes for *weeks* on end? There could even be a social libertarian movement that I could legit get behind; I'm 20 years old, perfect age for that kind of stuff to be going down.
> 
> ...


Having the national guard out really seems like overkill. It's pretty clear some form of martial law will be in effect soon.

Anyway, I think it's great pollution has dropped drastically almost everywhere. Maybe this will give us valuable lessons on  how to scale down production.

Also I will be thrilled if I get a 1000 check in the mail. I could use that money for a lot of stuff.


----------



## symantec (Mar 23, 2020)

At this point the best thing that will happen is China is nuked, we have complete societal meltdown, and we can all wear gimp suits while we cannibalize each other.


----------



## Shield Breaker (Mar 23, 2020)

Youtube welfare beggers might be forced to find a job.


----------



## Frostnipped Todger (Mar 23, 2020)

I got to stock up on ammunition without getting a funny look from the wife, and I have a bunch of hunts planned 'because we need the meat'. I live near a bunch of public land, and the snakes are starting to disappear, so it's a perfect time for getting out the boomstick. 
Pubs are shut, so I will save some money.
And my job is still going, so I still have money coming in.


----------



## Smaug's Smokey Hole (Mar 24, 2020)

A personal one-off: I ordered some things from german Amazon, partially because I was curious how this would affect their services and the general postal system. Their delivery notices are always spot on, really solid which is a thing I like about them. It now looks like my package sent with their free shipping will arrive 30 hours earlier than it would have normally, almost as fast the none-free UPS shipping. Weird.

edit: I made a post earlier, I expected a package at four in the afternoon tomorrow, it was here before eleven today.


----------



## snailslime (Mar 24, 2020)

It's a boomer remover


----------



## BroccoliBrain (Mar 24, 2020)

Spending time with my family because I actually like them.


----------



## Maxliam (Mar 24, 2020)

I think this might actually kill the Democrat party this November. Them blocking the stimulus bill to save the economy and workers will make people REALLY pissed off. I work with some die hard Democrats who openly admit Trump is handling this very well and acting like a president. This stalling on the Dems part is going to do nothing but hurt them. The liberal media can spin it any way they can but the American people can see it's plainly democrats being fags.

*sorry for the A&H style rant but some fag banned me from that forum and I can't say shit on there. Teh mods are fags.


----------



## NimertiS (Mar 29, 2020)

Dunno, we have finally the time to learn some new skills, see our family or just watch youtube and movies.
Gas price is down, but here we cannot be more than two people in the car, and we must have a reason to go anywhere.


----------



## Varis (Mar 31, 2020)

The Eurovision was cancelled. 
Romani beggars are leaving. 
Our happy tradition of kids begging for chocolate on Palm Sunday has been called off.


----------



## Feline Supremacist (Mar 31, 2020)

The beginning of the end of cheap chink shit. Not things like RAM or SSDs but rickety plastic fans that give up in the middle of summer during a heat wave and cannot be repaired. I'm hoping the country starts making essentials like medicine and PPE in the USA and sends the Chinese "students" home. For good.


----------



## Dysnomia (Mar 31, 2020)

JambledUpWords said:


> Fur cons are cancelled
> Troons can’t get surgeries to mutilate themselves
> ISIS terrorists are too worried about Corona-Chan to attack people
> Carbon emissions from China are lessened
> More people are aware of why open borders are a bad idea



I hope that these cancelled troon surgeries give some people time to think about getting the old choparoonie. Now that it's no longer all about "muh pronouns and 6000 genders" the focus is off most of this stuff. I know I am being optimistic, but Corona-chan may just be the beginning of the end for this lunacy being forcefully accepted and pushed on people. I don't think it is enough to end things. But the lack of attention on troonery right now may be a really nice sized bullet hole. 

Troons are used to being a bulletproof social class because they bullied the media and corporations into trading common sense for woke points. But now that people have to worry about a global pandemic that is threatening their jobs and their ability to lead a normal life there is no time to worry about what gender xir is feeling today. Get bent troons. Your time will come.

Munchies must be really angry right now. They can't spend half their lives in the ER faking being on the verge of death and taking selfies. Their days of wasting the time of medical professionals is over for now. There are real patients who could die. I would pay to see the look on munchie faces when they are told to go home and rest.


----------



## Club Sandwich (Mar 31, 2020)

shelter in place has been extended a month until May where i am. most people have supplies for a few weeks, but just-in-time delivery is starting to get strained in some areas as many people are ordering delivery, and stores that are seeing reduced traffic are curtailing bulk orders, which eats into margins used to keep trucking in goodies. this has a combination of driving up price and increasing scarcity. it's subtle but present.


----------



## Godzilla1984 (Mar 31, 2020)

My lack of employment will allow me to catch up on the main thread.


----------



## Pee Cola (Mar 31, 2020)

No more chuggers out the front of my local supermarket, at least for now.


----------



## Just Here for A and H (Mar 31, 2020)

A banker in Germany an heroed-by-train because he was forced to be alone with his thoughts and could no longer go to bougie sex parties. Womp womp. I also have the free time to devote more of my energy to finishing my short-fiction anthology, which is nice.


----------



## Ughubughughughughughghlug (Apr 2, 2020)

I like that New Yorkers are dying in large numbers.


----------



## Quijibo69 (Apr 2, 2020)

Less people on the roads when I go to work.


----------



## Quantum Diabetes (Apr 2, 2020)

Since the only people who are disobeying shelter at home orders are the usual melanin-rich gangbangers, even the most soyfilled sjw's are taking note that niggos are just wild animals fighting over territory and mating rights.


----------



## A Grey Cat (Apr 2, 2020)

Sorry if this comes off as powerleving a bit but, I still have my job at a steakhouse but my mom (who I don't live with btw) said I really need get a better "real job" that has like benifts, insurance a pension and all that. Idk why she had to be so uptight about it but a gen xer like her doesn't know about the lolcows on tard bucks that are way worse.

Anyway my point is recently I went back to indeed and a lot of places that promise benifts and such (not sure about pensions) like acme, FedEx and carepoint health are hiring. And keep in mind those companies almost never post on indeed, let alone have open hirings.


----------



## From The Uncanny Valley (Apr 2, 2020)

more time to think about my life situation.


----------



## A Grey Cat (Apr 2, 2020)

Uncanny Valley said:


> more time to think about my life situation.


Hey thanks for raiting my post with feels I expected at least one tmi or even a puzzle piece for disclosing details about myself


----------



## Ughubughughughughughghlug (Apr 3, 2020)

MrTroll said:


> Nobody's eating Chinese food anymore so restaurants are becoming fronts for prostitution. You can get a really good deal on a hooker who doesn't speak English right now.



Is this real and if so cite it.


----------



## emo goff (Apr 5, 2020)

Jasonfan89 said:


> Sorry if this comes off as powerleving a bit but, I still have my job at a steakhouse but my mom (who I don't live with btw) said I really need get a better "real job" that has like benifts, insurance a pension and all that. Idk why she had to be so uptight about it but a gen xer like her doesn't know about the lolcows on tard bucks that are way worse.
> 
> Anyway my point is recently I went back to indeed and a lot of places that promise benifts and such (not sure about pensions) like acme, FedEx and carepoint health are hiring. And keep in mind those companies almost never post on indeed, let alone have open hirings.



Job market for the good positions is in the toilet right now anyway, you're better off quarantining at home. We won't get another time where it's socially mandated to be a NEET lol.  

Fingers crossed for Corona doing a clean-up of boomers who refuse to leave their cushy jobs because "muh retirement is boring"


----------



## Just Here for A and H (Apr 5, 2020)

Lockdown is helping my phone-autism. People I'd normally only text or speak to in-person and more willing to do voice/phone chat, which I normally despise. I'm sure other phone-shy spergs are feeling the same way.


----------



## Guts Gets Some (Apr 13, 2020)

Never would've watched the Orville without all this free-time, never would've gone on a sci-fi kick and never would've wound up meeting someone really cool who's also mega into sci-fi (and so much more, it seems), who is quickly becoming a very very good friend.


----------



## Preferred Penne (Apr 14, 2020)

I've cut back on food and I've lost about ten pounds so far.


----------



## Cerabella (Apr 25, 2020)

I finally have a legit excuse to be jobless


----------



## Applejack (Apr 25, 2020)

Someone prolly already said it, but less chinks on servers


----------



## Yaoi Huntress Earth (May 5, 2020)

It's shown the true colors of a lot of rules-for-thee-not-for-me politicians.


----------

