# Unethical Weight Loss as fast as possible?



## Auguste Lumière (Jun 22, 2022)

Carnivore to Dinitrophenol. Share your experiences too! Currently living off 200 cals, Bang energy drinks and seltzer.


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## Stephanie Bustcakes (Jun 22, 2022)

Cut off a limb.


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## DumbDude42 (Jun 22, 2022)

stop taking dnp you retard
being done with your weight loss a couple weeks faster is not worth the permanent organ damage from dnp toxicity


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## Don Yagon (Jun 22, 2022)

Get a pinworm, he'll eat all your fat from inside.


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## autoerotic bus accident (Jun 22, 2022)

I'm assuming you mean something that wouldn't kill you, which excludes dnp. Jaundice, neuropathy and death rarely impress the ladies.

I'm gonna go with off-label adderall.


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## CockPockets (Jun 22, 2022)

Set yourself on fire


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## Akashic Retard (Jun 22, 2022)

Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:

2g of Himalayan pink salt
5g salt-free potassium chloride
2g edible Epsom salts
Do this for 5 days at a time, then eat a small meal in the morning on the 6th day. Then have a larger meal later in the day. Consume no more than 20g of carbs on that day for both meals combined. Repeat until you are at your target weight.

If you do this exactly you will lose weight, I promise. You're going to feel like shit at first and it's going to be really hard to not eat, but you gotta push past it, then you'll feel great and your appetite will subside. Do not slack on water drinking or you will feel like absolute shit. Don't chug it either though, you will just piss it out and the magnesium in the epsom salts will give you diarrhea, dehydrating you further. Gotta drink it at an even pace throughout the day. I recommend getting a 1 liter  reusable water bottle so you can regulate how much you are drinking. I think you'll find this even easier to do than eating 200 calories a day even without the adderall. You don't really need the adderall but it keeps you occupied and eliminates hunger. Added bonus is eating literally nothing really cuts down on grocery costs, which is pretty good nowadays.


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## Rear Admiral Butthole (Jun 22, 2022)

Give yourself AIDS. Or cancer and then go onto chemo.
Do a cardio routine of chasing women down the street at night.
Strength training by beating strays and the homeless with a club (be sure to alternate arms)


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## Massa's Little Buckie (Jun 22, 2022)

Get a tapeworm.


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## stupid frog (Jun 22, 2022)

Fasting.
Cocaine.
Cardio.

Good luck.


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## Gargoyle (Jun 22, 2022)

Not sure if this is unethical exactly but 2 years ago I was on vacation doing fuckall and I got so fucking lazy I couldn't be asked to prepare any food at all and I just ended up eating nothing but watermelons and kiwis for two weeks. And I wasn't really hungry because I was just sitting on my ass or sleeping the entire time.

I didn't think at the time to check how much I had lost but it must've been around 10 kilos.


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## Auguste Lumière (Jun 22, 2022)

Akashic Retard said:


> Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:
> 
> 2g of Himalayan pink salt
> 5g salt-free potassium chloride
> ...


So basically a snake juice diet with adderall?


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## Akashic Retard (Jun 22, 2022)

Auguste Lumière said:


> So basically a snake juice diet with adderall?


Yes.


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## From The Uncanny Valley (Jun 22, 2022)

God I wish.


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## Auguste Lumière (Jun 22, 2022)

DumbDude42 said:


> stop taking dnp you retard
> being done with your weight loss a couple weeks faster is not worth the permanent organ damage from dnp toxicity


Not using DNP but hey you lose weight when your dead am I right?


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## Jack Awful (Jun 22, 2022)

Bulemia


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## Owlflaps (Jun 22, 2022)

Put yourself in a medically induced coma and the pounds will fall right off!


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## Auguste Lumière (Jun 22, 2022)

Jack Awful said:


> Bulemia


What type/how far? 
(Side note other then Eugenia Cooney, are there any like Lolcow/Lolcow-related people like that?)


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## Jack Awful (Jun 22, 2022)

Auguste Lumière said:


> What type/how far?
> (Side note other then Eugenia Cooney, are there any like Lolcow/Lolcow-related people like that?)


Whatever goes in comes back out


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## Polock (Jun 22, 2022)

Akashic Retard said:


> Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:
> 
> 2g of Himalayan pink salt
> 5g salt-free potassium chloride
> ...


Do you actually have experience with this? I've actually heard about this retarded scheme before but it sounds kinda crazy.
I've done 3 day fasts before but they're miserable.

Edit: Also where do you get Adderal? College students? Maybe the trannies making their own HRT would know...


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## Manul Otocolobus (Jun 22, 2022)

> Carnivore to Dinitrophenol. Share your experiences too! Currently living off 200 cals, Bang energy drinks and seltzer.



DNP if you start very low and titrate up very, very slowly and it is winter in a very cold climate, that way you can control your body temperature easily. It would be best to be able to runs labs whenever you want because it's possible you will start to experience organ damage before gross dysfunction sets in since certain cells/organs in the body require much more energy on a continuous basis to function than others (liver, brain, cardiac, etc...). I'd also suggest pharmaceutical grade DNP, if not reference grade DNP to limit the possibilities of contamination in synthesis. Many of the stranger issues with DNP are likely caused by contaminants, isomers, and congeners from impure samples since the relatives of DNP are all rather toxic. Don't forget to take Dantrolene at the same time, it's the only way to avoid rhabdomyolysis due to muscle tetany from the spike in intracellular calcium caused by the uncoupling effect of DNP. If you really want to make sure you don't die, make sure that you have ports installed so you can run an ice-cold peritoneal lavage in the case of accidental malignant hyperthermia. Also make sure you have a good ophthalmologist that you know well so they can replace the lenses in your eyes with IOL's when you develop cataracts from the DNP.



Polock said:


> Do you actually have experience with this? I've actually heard about this retarded scheme before but it sounds kinda crazy.
> I've done 3 day fasts before but they're miserable.
> 
> Edit: Also where do you get Adderal? College students? Maybe the trannies making their own HRT would know...



It is crazy. One needs more than just various electrolytes, and the amount of food suggested would not be enough to meet mineral and micronutrient needs. One would quickly become extremely deficient in a number of critical essential nutrients. Plus the way it was written demonstrates that whoever came up with the ideal doesn't understand basic chemistry. Himalayan pink salt is not substantially different than regular table salt, being sodium chloride. There is no such thing as "salt-free" potassium chloride since potassium chloride is itself a salt. They likely meant "sodium-free" potassium chloride, which is kind of a "duh" since pure potassium chloride should not contain sodium. If someone doesn't know that potassium chloride is a salt, I would generally suggest no one listen to anything they have to say about dieting.


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## Basil Julep (Jun 22, 2022)

Polock said:


> Do you actually have experience with this? I've actually heard about this retarded scheme before but it sounds kinda crazy.
> I've done 3 day fasts before but they're miserable.


I have tried the snake juice salt thing with fasting and it definitely helped a lot with headaches and just feeling off.


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## Justtocheck (Jun 22, 2022)

Blood donation is pretty caloric intense as you recover.


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## Akashic Retard (Jun 22, 2022)

Polock said:


> Do you actually have experience with this? I've actually heard about this retarded scheme before but it sounds kinda crazy.
> I've done 3 day fasts before but they're miserable.
> 
> Edit: Also where do you get Adderal? College students? Maybe the trannies making their own HRT would know...


Yes, I usually just do OMAD or one meal every other day but I have done a ten day fast before. It gets pretty manageable 3 or 4 days in once you're in ketosis, assuming you're not already doing keto. I wouldn't fast if it wasn't also in combination with a keto diet because it just makes the hunger much easier to deal with and you don't have to deal with insulin going crazy and making you hungry when you refeed. The worst thing about it ime is if you do not stay on top of hydration you will get awful headaches.

Way more people take adderall than college students. A lot of the people you see on your screen do, I guarantee it. As for where to get it: google it.




Manul Otocolobus said:


> It is crazy. One needs more than just various electrolytes, and the amount of food suggested would not be enough to meet mineral and micronutrient needs. One would quickly become extremely deficient in a number of critical essential nutrients. Plus the way it was written demonstrates that whoever came up with the ideal doesn't understand basic chemistry. Himalayan pink salt is not substantially different than regular table salt, being sodium chloride. There is no such thing as "salt-free" potassium chloride since potassium chloride is itself a salt. They likely meant "sodium-free" potassium chloride, which is kind of a "duh" since pure potassium chloride should not contain sodium. If someone doesn't know that potassium chloride is a salt, I would generally suggest no one listen to anything they have to say about dieting.


Read the thread title. And this, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2495396/


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## Chocolate Wombat (Jun 22, 2022)

Akashic Retard said:


> Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:
> 
> 2g of Himalayan pink salt
> 5g salt-free potassium chloride
> ...


Can you drink more than 2 liters of water per day? I drink 3 to 6 liters on an average day.


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## Apochrypha (Jun 22, 2022)

ADHD pills, methylphenidate specifically. I was prescribed them a year back, quit them because they never helped me mentally and made me lose my appetite completely. I lost about 10lbs in two weeks. Gave me the sweats, too. I don't recommend but it's a pretty good way to lose weight I guess...if you can handle the feeling you start to get when it begins to wear off.


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## ChefKiss (Jun 22, 2022)

Just do some exercise you retard


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## Cpl. Long Dong Silver (Jun 22, 2022)

Akashic Retard said:


> Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:
> 
> 2g of Himalayan pink salt
> 5g salt-free potassium chloride
> ...


Do you mix the salt and chloride in the water or consume it some other way?


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## sadbird (Jun 22, 2022)

Inject yourself with malignant cancer cells. Guaranteed results in only a month!


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## Auguste Lumière (Jun 22, 2022)

What my current stack is eating up to 3200-400 cal of mostly protein a day (mostly at breakfast or lunch), 2 Bang energy drinks from morning to lunch, then I use seltzer with either Sugar-free Metamucil/Generic fiber powder to not feel hungry. Last I use a simple multivitamin and 10-20 min of heavy stair master since I have a bum shoulder ATM and cant lift.


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## EnemyStand (Jun 22, 2022)

Can't believe no one advocated flaying the flesh from your bones. Supermodel thinness in an hour or less, guaranteed!


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## snailslime (Jun 22, 2022)

Akashic Retard said:


> Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:
> 
> 2g of Himalayan pink salt
> 5g salt-free potassium chloride
> ...


This is stupid.

OP, ask a nutritionist to put together a diet plan for you.


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## Hambubger (Jun 22, 2022)

Go on the meth diet, the pounds melt right off


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## Shidoen (Jun 22, 2022)

Eat meat, lift heavy things. For females eat meat, lift heavy things.


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## Johnny Salami (Jun 23, 2022)

Akashic Retard said:


> Long term fasting. Take adderall daily and consume nothing else but 2 liters of water a day with:
> 
> 2g of Himalayan pink salt
> 5g salt-free potassium chloride
> ...


A follow snake Juice connoisseur


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## Milwaukee Macho Man (Jun 23, 2022)

I lost like 30 pounds in a month when I was 15 by just only eating apples for most of the day and like some meat for dinner and running 10 minutes a day on a treadmill.

I don't think that would work now that I'm 32 though.  Plus I weighed like 260 at the time.


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## Akashic Retard (Jun 23, 2022)

Basil Julep said:


> I have tried the snake juice salt thing with fasting and it definitely helped a lot with headaches and just feeling off.


I for sure won't fast for more than a day without it. I get horrible headaches otherwise.


Chocolate Wombat said:


> Can you drink more than 2 liters of water per day? I drink 3 to 6 liters on an average day.


idk maybe


Cpl. Long Dong Silver said:


> Do you mix the salt and chloride in the water or consume it some other way?


Mix


snailslime said:


> This is stupid.
> 
> OP, ask a nutritionist to put together a diet plan for you.


Expert advice there, you must really know your stuff. Off topic for the thread tho.


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## XYZpdq (Jun 27, 2022)

ECA stacks for cheap "brew it in your stomach" meth
lots of fiber at bedtime for extra pooping
plenty of vitamins so you don't die
meat and vodka for low carb full-ness

and exercise


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## Brahma (Jun 28, 2022)

Manul Otocolobus said:


> If you really want to make sure you don't die, make sure that you have ports installed so you can run an ice-cold peritoneal lavage in the case of accidental malignant hyperthermia



My fucking sides. Fuck water cooling your GPU, water cool yourself when you're trying to overclock you're metabolism


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## Some JERK (Jun 28, 2022)

Hookers and blow.


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## Mayor Adam West (Jun 28, 2022)

Liposuction and stomach staple.


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## Pope Urban (Sep 5, 2022)

Owlflaps said:


> Put yourself in a medically induced coma and the pounds will fall right off!


Elvis tried this.


			https://wonder-life.info/2017/09/13/elvis-presleys-dangerous-diet-put-him-in-a-coma/
		

If I remember correctly, the body begins retaining energy as much as possible when you stop eating altogether, which actually slows your weight loss down.


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## Kheapathic (Sep 29, 2022)

Did the one meal a day thing and worked out (90-120 minutes session) twice a day. Breakfast was two eggs, two slices of toast, and four sausage links. Did lifts in the morning, Stacker 1 and salt water throughout the day, cardio in the evening.

It sucks and your body and mind will hate you; but it got me visible abs.


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## Ughubughughughughughghlug (Oct 2, 2022)

Kheapathic said:


> Did the one meal a day thing and worked out (90-120 minutes session) twice a day. Breakfast was two eggs, two slices of toast, and four sausage links. Did lifts in the morning, Stacker 1 and salt water throughout the day, cardio in the evening.
> 
> It sucks and your body and mind will hate you; but it got me visible abs.


Was it worth it?


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## SSj_Ness (Oct 2, 2022)

If it's a lot of weight loss aren't you just going to be a big empty bag of flabby excess skin? Seems better to stay fat.


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## Kheapathic (Oct 2, 2022)

Ughubughughughughughghlug said:


> Was it worth it?


No.


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## Saint Agustin (Oct 2, 2022)

Just stop eating you fat fuck.


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## Ughubughughughughughghlug (Oct 2, 2022)

Kheapathic said:


> No.


I feel like if a person enjoys eating (some people genuinely don't) and doesn't enjoy exercise then it's optimal not to try to be ripped but to just get to acceptable.


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## Kheapathic (Oct 2, 2022)

Ughubughughughughughghlug said:


> I feel like if a person enjoys eating (some people genuinely don't) and doesn't enjoy exercise then it's optimal not to try to be ripped but to just get to acceptable.


I originally started because I'm more leg than torso but with the frame of a boxy fridge. Even though I was running a high first-class PFT, a SSgt didn't like the way I looked in PT clothes and would tell me to go get taped (usually reserved for fatties and PT failures). And due to how the Marine Corps measured body fat (waist measurement minus neck measurement equals body fat) I would often come up as "fat." So I did everything I could to shed without using straight illegal shit, had the best physique of my life... And still considered fat. Put on BCT, kept a food journal, all that gay shit. Then figured out you can "hack" the system by getting a beefier neck.


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## Mega Black (Oct 3, 2022)

Polock said:


> Do you actually have experience with this? I've actually heard about this retarded scheme before but it sounds kinda crazy.
> I've done 3 day fasts before but they're miserable.


I did every other day fasting for a while and it sucked fucking cock but I lost a lot of weight over the course of like three months. I'd recommend it if you can't exercise properly due to work or whatever, but five day fasts seem like they'll fuck you up big time, and the idea of having the squits all the time from the salt is less appealing than being a fat fuck.


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## Slimy Time (Oct 3, 2022)

Chop your legs off, that would be what, 1/3rd your weight off.


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## Penis (Oct 3, 2022)

poop


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## Big Booty Deathclaw (Oct 4, 2022)

The twist is; you eat MORE than you want.



Spoiler: or plan B


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## emoman gaming (Oct 12, 2022)

Steroids.
Raising testosterone to 3-5x the normal level will actually make you lose fat and not just any weight (muscles, bone density, teeth, etc). With proper diet and workout routine on top of that, the results are amazing. And it will give you tons of energy and motivation to work out. 
If you're at risk of alopecia, bulk of testosterone could be replaced with stanozolol. 
Obviously, read up on side effects and how to properly prevent those.


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## Monkey Pink (Nov 16, 2022)

Semaglutide.

Sold as Ozempic, Wegovy, Rybelsus. Been real easy to get a prescription but there's a shortage because TikTok thots caught onto it. It's MEANT for diabetics and the morbidly obese.

I'm surprised I never see /fit/ mention it.


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## Idaho Battle Barn (Nov 16, 2022)

DNP. It basically messes with your mitochondria the powerhouse of the cell so that a huge portion of the energy that is being created is lost as heat instead of being converted into ATP/energy. Therefore your body needs to burn more energy to get ATP, which is needed for other metabolic processes.

You can die from overheating.


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## gurutu (Nov 21, 2022)

Idaho Battle Barn said:


> You can die from overheating.


No problem with that, you lose even more!!


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## coof coof (Dec 6, 2022)

Surprised no one has brought up ostarine yet. At clinical doses it causes you to melt visceral fat while also helping you to retain muscle in a steep deficit. In no way safe, but if you're on 10mg or less a day and keeping track of blood work its probably safer than getting methed out to lose weight.


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## Smug (Dec 13, 2022)

You don't need to worry about 'mUh MeTaBoLiSm' if you stop eating and carry on exercising super hard. You can't magically _ not_ burn calories while doing physical work. All you need to worry about is staying hydrated and not dying from lack of salts etc.


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## lysol terminal (Dec 14, 2022)

Quit all snacks and sugar.
Doing 0.1 lines of Crystal Meth at 6 hour intervals.
DO NOT EXCEED 5 DAYS OF NO SLEEP.
Consult your doctor first, but Benadryl helped me sleep before I was again assailed by Shades.
The Shades (Shadow People) are real, Amphetamines accelerate your physiological existence and grind you into the zenith of the Underworld.
This helped me get started.
be prepared to work off your sleep debt and if push comes to shove just out-psycho your new junkie GF who you don't remember meeting but can't forget the head-game.


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## SeventhSwell (Dec 18, 2022)

i guess this is satire but if you want to genuinely do warcrime levels of weight cutting, do a hardcore warrior diet.

I did it for like 5 months was around 90kg and went to 79kg. I dont suggest it, it sucks but the basic premise is you only eat 1 meal in a 1hr per day, and you fast for 2-3 days over the weekeend. Make sure those meals are very filling with good carbs ALOT of protein and veggies. Also daily training is recommended. When returning from your longterm fast, eat very light foods.


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## ten dollars off (Dec 18, 2022)

be prepared for lots of loose skin!


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