11/06/2021 Ethan Ralph Totaled His Car - Hard to drive with hooves.

[RodgerDodger]

My money is someone honked at him to go while he was at a red that just turned green, he panicked and then got t bones by someone running the red.

That person honking is probably MeltyTW who will all know is honking outside of Gators neighborhood

Just from looking at the car, he was T boned making a probably ill advised or illegal Left Turn into fairly high speed on coming cross traffic. Impact angle was slightly from the rear, not a dead on side hit. Probably 30-45 degrees to the rear. Hitting right rear door area first. Impact was at least 35 mph just going by the amount of deformation Into the passenger compartment. Probably a bit higher. You don’t often see the imprint of a car in the side of another vehicle like that. Granted it was a cheap ass Nissan. Ralph’s wheels are turned right, but that was probably from hitting the curb. Also worth noting is the deformity to the roof. Look at the left rear corner of the roof, and how it has been popped up.

He probably made a left turn and was hit by an oncoming car in the lane/direction he was turning into.

 

[dogewhistle]

A cautionary tale, applicable to literally every time Ralph fucks himself:

A washed up and talentless cunt
yet again evades death with this stunt.
between the lines he was snorting
he chimes "no aborting!"
this wreck of a man -nay, a gunt

 

[MarvinTheParanoidAndroid]

First it was Spoony.

Then it was Ralph.

 

[TheBeanz]

Do we have any details on whose fault this was? Did some guy run a red light and t-bone gunt or did he pull out in front of someone?

From the photos it's pretty clear it's at T-Bone. Generally the person doing the T-Bone is at fault, but this also looks to have taken place at a junction and Amerimutts have that stupid rule about turning right on a red light, so it's equally possible Ralph's to blame.

 

[AltisticRight]

Why would anyone call their car a "superchat mobile"? It's a worthless cheaply made pile of trash that's probably no better than those Soviet plastic cars with an eyesore attention seeking paint job. Gross. Wonder how many monthly payments are left on that atrocious carrier. With the proclivity to endless sharting and farts hold some percentage of flammable gases, this wasn't the worst possible outcome. Imagine if he sharted while lighting one of those thick cigars? The Department of Defence would have their nukes falsely aimed at North Korea.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

First a heart attack, then a car crash. I think it's time Ethan make's his peace with God cause he's clearly found himself in a shitty version of Final Destination. Seems like a fitting end to round off the rest of his horror classics.

The Meth Bitch Project
A Nightmare on Gunt's Dick
Git Out!
Child of the Corn
Evil Dad
American Horse Story
The Rang

and coming soon to a forum near you

Child of the Corn 2: Return of the Gunt

 

[Motherf*cker]

Damn man, you just beat me to a similar comment@UCantCCPMe

 

[AStupidMonkey]

I doubt there is any way to determine from the evidence we have of Ralph getting T-boned running a red light vs being hit by red light runner. However, from Ralph's response I think the most likely outcome is he is at fault. His blowing up over Faith's text likely gives away that looking at the phone was the cause.

In response to the poll, I think it was just the distracted driving with his phone and alcohol wasn't involved.

Fun fact tho: if your blood is 30% makers mark, it might take you a little extra to become noticeably impaired.

I wouldn't generally use the word "functioning" to describe Ralph, but tack on a hyphen and an "alcoholic" or "autistic," and suddenly the slipper fits.

 

[moocow]

Maybe people would talk less shit about Ralph if he didn't feel the need to tweet every moment of his existence to the world.

Dude, if more people felt this way, Twitter wouldn't even be a thing. God, just imagine how much better the world would have been...

From the photos it's pretty clear it's at T-Bone. Generally the person doing the T-Bone is at fault, but this also looks to have taken place at a junction and Amerimutts have that stupid rule about turning right on a red light, so it's equally possible Ralph's to blame.

Europoors have that bizarre tendency to drive on the wrong side of the road, which explains why it would seem feasible to them that Ralph's car could have sustained such damage to its right side by making a right turn onto another road ... where traffic would only be approaching from the left even if he did run a red light.

sorry lad, couldn't resist

 

[Sam Losco]

From the photos it's pretty clear it's at T-Bone. Generally the person doing the T-Bone is at fault, but this also looks to have taken place at a junction and Amerimutts have that stupid rule about turning right on a red light, so it's equally possible Ralph's to blame.

Umm yeah, he was hit on the passenger side (right side of the car) so how would Ralph turning right open him up to that? And how is it a stupid rule? Oh, I know why you think that, because you think a right turn is crossing traffic. We also drive on the right side of the road here so a right turn doesn't cross traffic, a left does.

He could have easily been t-boned and at fault if he ran through a red light and was hit by cross traffic, or if he was trying to make a left turn across traffic. Happens all the damn time.
He continues to say nothing about the other driver so I continue to be certain he's at fault. If the other driver was at fault, he'd be in Ralphamale mode and seething about it and threatening civil action.

 

[Evil Peter Griffin]

I didnt even know he had a car. I assumed he just rolled everywhere. I do feel bad for that car seat, The horror stories it could tell.

 

[Noproblemo]

Good thing he didn't go through with the weight loss challenge, all that fat braced his impact.

 

[Maggots on a Train v2]

@The First Fag

Here you go:
View attachment 2697121

Damn, this guy is only in his mid thirties, and already physically older than both Lowtax and a physically fit seventy year old man.

 

[MeltyTW]

My money is someone honked at him to go while he was at a red that just turned green, he panicked and then got t bones by someone running the red.

That person honking is probably MeltyTW who will all know is honking outside of Gators neighborhood

can confirm am now suing the fat pos for damaging my expensive car

 

[Big Meaty Claws]

This was obviously a assassination attempt by Joshua to put down a TRUE AND HARD WORKING, WINNING BOY LIKE RALPH
Lets show our supports by posting our proud Rainbow gunts!

 

[Hambubger]

Why do I feel this happened during a trip the gunt was trying get ass

 

[Thisismyusername]

I love how he made sure to not wipe the blood from where his fat fucking head smacked into his window. "I'm a warrior yall, I'm bleeding for the killstream"

Honestly though, how the fuck did he propel his gunt out of a car that low? Guarantee he is getting a van or something wheelchair accessible next.

 

[Bowl of Ramen]

First a heart attack, then a car crash. I think it's time Ethan make's his peace with God cause he's clearly found himself in a shitty version of Final Destination. Seems like a fitting end to round off the rest of his horror classics.

The Meth Bitch Project
A Nightmare on Gunt's Dick
Git Out!
Child of the Corn
Evil Dad
American Horse Story
The Rang

and coming soon to a forum near you

Child of the Corn 2: Return of the Gunt

Don’t forget The Shittening.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Why do I feel this happened during a trip the gunt was trying get ass

Well Jacob Wohl has a more feminine ass than Pantsu so you might be on to something. Maybe Wohl’s fitness influencer efforts have finally paid dividends and the Gunt wants hit something that will be tight enough for the Memphis micro.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Imagine being so desperate to get away from your horsefriend that you’ll bolt from the barn at 7AM after a measly hour of sleep. If it’s this bad during the first trimester, imagine how awful things would be if they were to stay together until the baby is born (they won’t).