- Joined
- Sep 13, 2021
Ayo, gots fitty dolla right hee. Less git Crix Hansen ouchea. Shout out happy birfday!
Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks
- Thread starter SpacePanther
- Start date
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2020
He's a combination of immortan Joe and the kool-aid man.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
Ehhhh... I don't know how much Lucas is actually banking on his parents taking him back in and bequeathing their vast fortunes to their hobo son and how much he is just trying to use it as a way to bait women into dating him because he thinks money, land and heads of elk will bribe them into being his zoomer bride.
He might also be talking about his parents so much because he reads this thread and has to "prove" to the haters that ackychually Mommie Myrna & King Roy love their hobofreak son.
Because eating is the last bit of consolation in his life that he has control of.
I do believe he thinks if he gets himself a girlfriend/wife it'll be the way to get back in with his parents. That's why he has always talked about getting married on his father's property. Of course since he himself has nothing good to offer he dangles his parents "wealth" to try and lure in a bae.
ETA:
Yes, the Creep will lie for cash/when it suits him. Lying comes easy to a pathological liar.
Zoomer Bae
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 19, 2021
Who wouldn’t want an incoherent, mentally ill hobo to represent them in an argument? It really says a lot that Lucas thinks this is one of his most marketable skills.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
That face is terrifying.
Ladies, imagine you pass out on a couch and wake up to that staring over you.
- Joined
- Jan 27, 2020
You know you're in dire straits when there's outdoor sheetmetal siding instead of drywall. I'd almost say poor man's fire separation but that's a shitty cardboard core door set into it.
Not just any food either. Institutional cafeteria style food,laden with starch.
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2019
It's so hilariously frustrating that he's years late on every trend he tries.
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2020
Translation
I knicked myself up because my usual nurse wasn't here to shave my corpulent face.
I knicked myself up because my usual nurse wasn't here to shave my corpulent face.
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2019
He also can't manage to get all of the hair off.
I mean Jesus Christ, dude, you're 42, and you shave like a little kid who got into daddy's shaving kit then tried to do it blindfolded.
He tries to blame a cheap razor but, like, it's not...that hard. I used cheap Bic single blade razors (sometimes dull af because I was dirt poor at one point) all the time and still manage to shave everything off my face and not slice it up like I'd been face rubbing a cheese grater.
Even with the razor I use now that's a single blade that uses a removable actual blade, I only nicked myself a couple of times while getting used to the different angle I had to hold it at and the length of strokes I could use vs. a disposable razor that, even if you're a borderline retard, you can usually just slide right over whole huge areas in one stroke and not start bleeding.
Plus, he clearly knows how to use his phone as a mirror, why would he not go back and get the spots he missed? That's rhetorical, he's a slob and doesn't give a shit, but y'know...
Apparently after I've had a drink or two the fact that Lucas is 42 and can't groom himself even semi-properly becomes a pet peeve.
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2021
The projection game strong, as the Basketball Americans would say. "You're schizophrenic! A-and probably a Jesus freak!" Again, such a specific insult to levy at anyone and everyone. Any one of his critics who reads this meme is a schizophrenic who thinks himself cured by Jesus? I mean, what? I guess we're also all drug dealers who wear a specific type of hat, we all have seven girlfriends each, and we all claim to be woke and then say racist, homophobic and sexist shit when our socialist sex slaves aren't around to hear it. We are all this incredibly specific boogeyman character, who would be ridiculous in a movie or book. This insult definitely makes sense and lands, it's not just a brazen admission that my man the Wern is insane or anything
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2021
Not even so much as a passive aggressive sulking video from the fat faggot so far "On this, the day of the birth of the Wern." It's amazing what taking your fuckin meds can do when you're a sped like Lucas, isn't it? Almost a shame It'll all be gone in a couple months when he decides he's had enough nursing home food and decides to break hibernation early to spend his hard earned tard bux on some impressive meals.
- Joined
- May 15, 2020
Oh he big mad.
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- Joined
- Dec 1, 2019
- Joined
- May 15, 2020
I think he's trying to shout down the knowledge that even he must have that he is going to lose his feet.Taking that "not getting laid on his birthday AGAIN" out on you
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2021
How sad is it that the majority of people who care about your birthday are a group of internet anons dedicated to documenting your exceptional faggotry. Another year of being financially supported by strangers while making it your life's mission spending days upon weeks upon months rewriting the same talking points about how unfair society is to the poor, Another link on the telomere chain, another year of serving absolutely no purpose beside providing a cheap laugh to strangers. Oh yeah, and those ground breaking contributions to boardgame design. I'll be sure to pick up a copy of Squonk for my zoomer bae coven to use as a changing table for all our telomere deficient babies.
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
At this rate he's about 8 months away from getting into the pog and spice girl trends
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2019
Pogs will make a comeback, hand to god.
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2019
Does anyone know roughly where in this thread I can find Lucas’s posts on Mikayla (or however he spelled it)? I believe it was mid 2018.
I have some independent research going on.
I have some independent research going on.