Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[That Guy Who Likes The Chili]

Be fair. There's no way his fat ass would've fit in a locker.


What really gets me about Bob and his arrogance is the simple fact that he suffers no consequences for it. He never gets what he richly deserves. Other cows do, but not Bob. It'll be a fine day when he enters a diabetic coma while tweeting his latest screed.

"Just... one... more... twee... eet...."

One of the reasons for this is because there is really no consequences for him to suffer.
Everyone who is "anyone" in the group of people he aspires to be and rub shoulders with virtually treats him as a non entity.
He tweets 24/7 the most woke-ass shit you can dream of and @'s everyone he can think of is in the hopes that he will earn some kind of recognition from those he cares about, but that very very rarely happens.
He is already isolated and impotent, the only way he could sink any lower is if he lost his patreon.

 

[TeamTurd99]

Reading through Bob's screenplays and @Therealhomor 's much better adaptations reminded me of this scene in American Dad when the boys find the script for Fast and the Furious 7:

 

[NotFatChild]

I think that's the real reason the board goes nuts when Bob gets fired from an Escapist or nuked from orbit by a Lindsay. Even his dustup with Amanda Milius brought us unseemly joy. Humiliations like that are the closest he's likely to get to a comeuppance ... because, really, he doesn't have all that much to lose.

To be canceled, you have to have something to be canceled from to begin with.

40+ year old balding fat men with no job and insufferable personalities (also, fat) living in their parents basement usually don't have much else you can take away from them.

 

[TowinKarz]

Be fair. There's no way his fat ass would've fit in a locker.


What really gets me about Bob and his arrogance is the simple fact that he suffers no consequences for it. He never gets what he richly deserves. Other cows do, but not Bob. It'll be a fine day when he enters a diabetic coma while tweeting his latest screed.

"Just... one... more... twee... eet...."

Being Bob is it's own punishment, we know it even if he'll never see it or admit to it.

 

[MarineN*423543]

I'm an animation sperg, so I know a thing or two about animation, including the 3D kind.

When you create 3D animation, the actual model itself cannot move (except for physics-based animation, or sliding around like SCP-173.) To make a model move its arms, legs, and such, you need to rig the model. Simply put, the model is a meat body, and the rig is the skeleton that allows the model to move. Incidentally, this is how skins in video games work: the model itself is switched out, while the rig (and animations done with that rig) are left.

With Sonic the Hedgehog, all the animators needed to do is create a new Sonic model and hook it up to the old rig. Even the facial animations could be redone like this (and if they couldn't, it'd be easy to do motion capture again.) The fix is simple and probably took all of a month or two to implement. 3D animators are lazy, and many 3D animation tutorials are simply tutorials on how to get the computer to do the work for you. If the movie was halfway done when the change was ordered, even better: replace the old model in the shots you finished, and use the new one in the unfinished shots.

Bob doesn't give two shits about the animation industry, particularly given his boner for the Marvel CGI Universe. He's just looking for an excuse to attack the Sonic movie.

of course, anything for the great leader of the superior future mario

Or learn from Moviebob, in which they should actively practice eugenics because they shouldn't reproduce.

well bob is an expert on auto eugenics, is jsut that he doesnt realize it yet lol

I think that's the real reason the board goes nuts when Bob gets fired from an Escapist or nuked from orbit by a Lindsay. Even his dustup with Amanda Milius brought us unseemly joy. Humiliations like that are the closest he's likely to get to a comeuppance ... because, really, he doesn't have all that much to lose.

Being himself is enough punishment, like chris im sure he has bouts for self awareness, old little money hated by all, sick, holed on his parents basement but all he can do is bury those feelings on delusions, he makes ppl angry because is powerless he rages on his cage of walls and lard

 

[Smithfield Ham]

Reading through Bob's screenplays and @Therealhomor 's much better adaptations reminded me of this scene in American Dad when the boys find the script for Fast and the Furious 7:

Thank you so much for the compliment, and posting one of my favorite gags from AD. But the dirty little secret is almost anybody in this thread is capable of writing a better pitch than Bob. If I picked a random person in this thread and said "Give me a pitch for a Megaman/Captain Planet/Care Bears movie in 48 hours or you have to eat dog shit from a bowl. Minimum 800 words." I'd end up with way more entertaining to read. It'd also definitely make a better movie if they actually produced it. Even if it was just a dumb shitpost or a parody.

I think Bob's storytelling ability is below average. Simple things like character arcs, hero's journey, Chekov's Gun, they're all concepts he might have some understanding of but no real interest in or ability to execute. His only method of storycrafting is trying to emulate the Marvel formula beat-for-beat. Even at his best, his pitches read like a cynical producer envisioning what a million-dollar popcorn flick would look like.

 

[Mola Ram]

I think Bob's storytelling ability is below average. Simple things like character arcs, hero's journey, Chekov's Gun, they're all concepts he might have some understanding of but no real interest in or ability to execute. His only method of storycrafting is trying to emulate the Marvel formula beat-for-beat. Even at his best, his pitches read like a cynical producer envisioning what a million-dollar popcorn flick would look like.

Bob may grasp these things as concepts, if only because both his heroes and villains in the industry are forever going on about them, but he seems purely incapable of applying them to an actual story. I think the best example is the first: Brick by Brick, where he inexplicably thought a tedious blow by blow of every little step of Super Mario Bros. 3 -- a game which has only the barest glimmer of a story as an excuse for gameplay -- would be super-interesting and not an indigestible slog of text.

 

[Brother Wind]

I think Bob's storytelling ability is below average. Simple things like character arcs, hero's journey, Chekov's Gun, they're all concepts he might have some understanding of but no real interest in or ability to execute. His only method of storycrafting is trying to emulate the Marvel formula beat-for-beat. Even at his best, his pitches read like a cynical producer envisioning what a million-dollar popcorn flick would look like.

Its why I got all pinwheel about his Mega Man pitch. Because it wasn't a plot. It was set pieces. That's all he sees movies and stories as.

 

[Adamska]

Its why I got all pinwheel about his Mega Man pitch. Because it wasn't a plot. It was set pieces. That's all he sees movies and stories as.

Not just set pieces, it shows he needs to shove in so much shit at once it burns through materials, money for the production, and clutters the screen.

Bob's entire film writing ethos is summed with that one shot in Rise of Skywalker where you see all those ships zip in for the final battle and it's just cluttered garbage. As for why he wants it that way? Probably because he just claps at the explosions like a small child and that's all he cares about when it comes to a film for him.

 

[Nate Higgers]

A butter golem

Insult of the year

 

[ChampFantana]

I think that's the real reason the board goes nuts when Bob gets fired from an Escapist or nuked from orbit by a Lindsay. Even his dustup with Amanda Milius brought us unseemly joy. Humiliations like that are the closest he's likely to get to a comeuppance ... because, really, he doesn't have all that much to lose.

Now now, he still has his virginity. Of course, that will be with him until the day he keels over from a massive coronary in the middle of some random Twitter tardfit.

 

[Positron]

Social shame as public health measure:

Again, social shame did work in smoking cessation, but the problem nowadays is that the Dems are widely seen as duplicitous and morally degenerate, and as thus in no position to shame people.



Boebert makes another blooper:




Bimbo continues his nuclear skeed:

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The debate about the supposed superiority of human vs animals has become loaded with accusations about "slavery". The Yankee Tankie is just as kooky as Bobby:







I'm not starting a course of Animal Ethics 101 but I have strong misgivings about Fox G. Green's assertion.

Bobby thinks making animals do human's job is "skeevy"

Okay, animal "enslave" each other (or, if you prefer a less loaded expression, use each other to further their own reproduction at the expense of the other party's life) all the time. If, as per Bobby, humans are no better than animals and usually much worse, human should then deserve no higher moral status than animals, and slavery is justified. You can even argue that Bobby's preferred "decently-behaved Labrador" is but a victim of emotional slavery.



Bobby has such a huge gravitational pull that all convos invariably come back to his eugenics advocacy:



There is no bad tactics, remember?



BTW I can't in good conscience leave out B. Coul's goodbye message, although I can't fit it anywhere:

---

Michael Keaton is having a second spring:






We have always been antifascist:

Of course you can't spell Matrix without "trannies". The three people with the highest IQ in the world speculate the gender of Trinity.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I've never got why Bob runs to the jannies (well, actually I understand why - it's to cover up the fact he's losing an argument) so often.

In my time on Twitter I've used the report button twice. One of those times was on a Chinese spambot. I honestly find it weird that Bob just jumps to reporting people he disagrees with.

 

[Mola Ram]

I've never got why Bob runs to the jannies (well, actually I understand why - it's to cover up the fact he's losing an argument) so often.

In my time on Twitter I've used the report button twice. One of those times was on a Chinese spambot. I honestly find it weird that Bob just jumps to reporting people he disagrees with.

I report Bob all the time but nothing ever comes of it.

 

[Pokemonquistador2]

The same people who screech that people are nothing but animals with Thumbs will scoff at the idea that behavior is sex linked, that chromosomes determine sex, and that instinct and environment will determine a person's psychology. They don't even know that evolution is a reactive process, not some magical force that only makes people stronger and smarter over time. But then again, most of these same screechers are people who believe in metaphysicial concepts like "The Right Side of History" while denying that God or the Supernatural exists.

 

[BubbleButt]

All science is true unless it gives me bad feelings

 

[JayHarrison]

Social shame as public health measure:
View attachment 2821720
Again, social shame did work in smoking cessation, but the problem nowadays is that the Dems are widely seen as duplicitous and morally degenerate, and as thus in no position to shame people.

Since he shares many of the same negative traits he accuses others of having, Moviebob is also in no position to shame people--or, as he'd say, "people" in quotes.

View attachment 2821736

Thank you, DrWallkick.

---

Boebert makes another blooper:
View attachment 2821644

Believe me: There are many quotes Moviebob will have on his permanent record, many of which make Bob look like a literal Nazi, but with a different nationality.

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View attachment 2821757

"Doesn't want to be married to a Nazi" is the same reason my women don't want to marry Moviebob.

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Bimbo continues his nuclear skeed:
View attachment 2821783

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The debate about the supposed superiority of human vs animals has become loaded with accusations about "slavery". The Yankee Tankie is just as kooky as Bobby:
View attachment 2821706

"I don't belong to any man or god" sounds about right for the Bostonian Benito. He belongs to Democrat women like Alexandria Occasional-Cortex, Imam Omar, Fauxcahontas, and, most commonly of all, Beloved Führer Hillary.

---

View attachment 2821703

By saying "I hate bad people within the human race", is Bob actually admitting to be a self-loathing assnugget?

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View attachment 2821774
I'm not starting a course of Animal Ethics 101 but I have strong misgivings about Fox G. Green's assertion.

Moviebob's not going to place animals over the human race. Philosophical übermensch that he is, Bob consistently put himself above the human race.

---

Bobby thinks making animals do human's job is "skeevy"
View attachment 2821679
Okay, animal "enslave" each other (or, if you prefer a less loaded expression, use each other to further their own reproduction at the expense of the other party's life) all the time. If, as per Bobby, humans are no better than animals and usually much worse, human should then deserve no higher moral status than animals, and slavery is justified. You can even argue that Bobby's preferred "decently-behaved Labrador" is but a victim of emotional slavery.

A decently-behaved Labrador would already be a victim of emotional slavery if Moviebob was its owner/parent/caretaker/guardian.

---

Bobby has such a huge gravitational pull that all convos invariably come back to his eugenics advocacy:
View attachment 2821768

Per Moviebob's standards, "trying to be nice" is basically him de-humanizing others with less vulgar language.

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View attachment 2821769
There is no bad tactics, remember?

Moviebob uses low-blow tactics against people he hates: Perfectly acceptable.

Moviebob targeted by the same low-blow tactics he uses himself: "HELP! TAAGETED HARAASSMENT!

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View attachment 2821776

BTW I can't in good conscience leave out B. Coul's goodbye message, although I can't fit it anywhere:
View attachment 2821751

Vaccines good? Yes. Brian_Coulombe1 bad? DEFINITELY!

---

In my time on Twitter I've used the report button twice. One of those times was on a Chinese spambot. I honestly find it weird that Bob just jumps to reporting people he disagrees with.

I report Bob all the time but nothing ever comes of it.

I've reported Moviebob's posts several times (I've never taken actual count, but I wouldn't be surprised if I've reported 100 of his posts), almost always because these particular tweets in question are clear and blatant violations of Twitter's Terms of Service. Why should anyone who has openly condoned bio-terrorism toward a politician (Moviebob telling "all good Texans with even a head cold to cough on Texas Governor Greg Abbot", not verbatim, being my go-to example) still be allowed to have a Twitter account? (That comment alone should have rendered Moviebob permanently unhirable.)

 

[Woe-B-Gon (TM)]

Hello small child in Wyoming, just starting your first Christmas vacation from elementary school. Yes, you. Please stop picking your nose, this is important.

I have come here from the bowels of the internet to let you know Robert Chipman, Esq. hates you due to where you were born. Should you catch Covid and die - don't worry, you look like you don't have the six or so comorbidities it would take for someone in your age group to die, it's basically impossible - Robert will consider the snuffing out of your innocent life a great event and celebrate it by mocking your parents as they lower a tiny box into the ground, his only lament that they're not in there with you.

Oh, yes, he hates your parents too, I forgot to mention that.

But the important thing to remember about this is that Robert Chipman, Esq. does not hate groups. Rather, he hates you personally because of a happenstance of your birth which he has decided makes you so completely valueless and dispensable that his mere feeling of contempt overwhelms all the good in you and is enough to sentence you to death. He, like many great thinkers, works entirely off of emotion and that emotion is insensate impotent rage.

Why am I telling you this, small child? Well, it's very simple. Robert is what I like to call a bellwether.

Oh, you've never heard that word? Let me try again: Robert is like a canary in the coal mine.

Never heard that one either, huh? Shame, that worked so well with that West Virginia child. What do they mine from over there? In those mountains.

The Grand what? Do you know what that means?

Don't worry about it, I'm sure in about ten years you'll find it hilarious.

Anyway, Robert is... like a fire alarm. He screams real loud when there's not much fire, so people who are listening can get their children to safety before the fire gets too bad.

And that's why I'm here. I would like you to tell your parents what your teacher said about how Timmy was being "oppressed" because all of you colored Santa "white" during your little coloring class last week and no one decided to color him like Timmy is. Remember how bad you felt when she made all of you look mean and singled Timmy out as being weak and special just because of that thing about yourselves you can't change? You need to talk to your parents about that.

Because Robert is screaming, and your Mommy and Daddy need to know before the fire gets too bad.

 

[King Dead]

Bimbo continues his nuclear skeed:
View attachment 2821783

Now, I'm certainly a proponent of nuclear power, and I find it stupid that it's borderline impossible to get another plant greenlit due to pressure by greenies, especially how nuclear produces zero CO2 which is the gravest threat to society apparently. You'll hear no arguments from me against further development of nuclear plants, given the advancements made over the years that greatly reduce the risk, as well as the potential to deliver plenty of power for decades to come.

However, I had to comment on Bob's incredible stupidity here. He seriously thinks that it's those damn dirty scoundrels at Big Oil keeping the poor renewable energy industry down! I mean, sure, the sun doesn't shine 24 hours a day, and wind is unpredictable, and solar panels and windmills are grossly inefficient at capturing energy, and there's a lot of pollution in making them, and they don't generally recoup their energy costs before they break down, and they're not really all that easily recycled (to the point that we're getting piles and piles of windmill blades and no idea what to do with them all)...but ignore all that, it's clearly all a conspiracy! Those fossil fuel luddites are standing in the way of the Superior Future again!

This is what Bob actually believes.

 

[verymuchawful]

Now, I'm certainly a proponent of nuclear power, and I find it stupid that it's borderline impossible to get another plant greenlit due to pressure by greenies, especially how nuclear produces zero CO2 which is the gravest threat to society apparently. You'll hear no arguments from me against further development of nuclear plants, given the advancements made over the years that greatly reduce the risk, as well as the potential to deliver plenty of power for decades to come.

However, I had to comment on Bob's incredible stupidity here. He seriously thinks that it's those damn dirty scoundrels at Big Oil keeping the poor renewable energy industry down! I mean, sure, the sun doesn't shine 24 hours a day, and wind is unpredictable, and solar panels and windmills are grossly inefficient at capturing energy, and there's a lot of pollution in making them, and they don't generally recoup their energy costs before they break down, and they're not really all that easily recycled (to the point that we're getting piles and piles of windmill blades and no idea what to do with them all)...but ignore all that, it's clearly all a conspiracy! Those fossil fuel luddites are standing in the way of the Superior Future again!

This is what Bob actually believes.

Chernobyl documentaries and corporate environmentalist propaganda created a generation of people brainwashed into thinking nuclear energy is bad. You tell them it isn't anywhere near as bad for the environment as they think it is, then they just jump to it being unsafe because of a major fuck up with Chernobyl and thus it should never be tried again. People grew up with the Simpsons where the main character is a complete idiot that works at a nuclear power plant of all things, then the owner of the nuclear power plant is fucking Mr. Burns. And then that's their perception of nuclear power. Though props to Bob for being a broken clock that was right, but still wrong at the same time.