Hello small child in Wyoming, just starting your first Christmas vacation from elementary school. Yes, you. Please stop picking your nose, this is important.
I have come here from the bowels of the internet to let you know Robert Chipman, Esq. hates you due to where you were born. Should you catch Covid and die - don't worry, you look like you don't have the six or so comorbidities it would take for someone in your age group to die, it's basically impossible - Robert will consider the snuffing out of your innocent life a great event and celebrate it by mocking your parents as they lower a tiny box into the ground, his only lament that they're not in there with you.
Oh, yes, he hates your parents too, I forgot to mention that.
But the important thing to remember about this is that Robert Chipman, Esq. does not hate groups. Rather, he hates you
personally because of a happenstance of your birth which he has decided makes you so completely valueless and dispensable that his mere
feeling of contempt overwhelms all the good in you and is enough to sentence you to death. He, like many great thinkers, works entirely off of emotion and that emotion is insensate impotent rage.
Why am I telling you this, small child? Well, it's very simple. Robert is what I like to call a bellwether.
Oh, you've never heard that word? Let me try again: Robert is like a canary in the coal mine.
Never heard that one either, huh? Shame, that worked so well with that West Virginia child. What do they mine from over there? In those mountains.
The Grand
what? Do you know what that means?
Don't worry about it, I'm sure in about ten years you'll find it hilarious.
Anyway, Robert is... like a fire alarm. He screams real loud when there's not much fire, so people who are listening can get their children to safety before the fire gets too bad.
And that's why I'm here. I would like you to tell your parents what your teacher said about how Timmy was being "oppressed" because all of you colored Santa "white" during your little coloring class last week and no one decided to color him like Timmy is. Remember how bad you felt when she made all of you look mean and singled Timmy out as being weak and special just because of that thing about yourselves you can't change? You need to talk to your parents about that.
Because Robert is screaming, and your Mommy and Daddy need to know before the fire gets too bad.