Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[WonderWino]

So I put bumcel into a youtube search and this came up

Apparently another wernologist making clips of questionable things lucas has said. too bad the autistic owls didn't bring that clip up live last night to see how he reacted to it. would have been hilarious to see him try to talk his way out of that one

Also, fucking lol at this one

 

[Da Dude123]

Once again proving he thinks women are chattel.

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He posted more of his story, so I'll be reading that later tonight.

Another gem.

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That $15 leaves the wallet and immediately is spent at the 7-11 on pizza and slurpees, by the time the baby zooms come by you have already spent the 15 bones. Just a broke hobo who stays in a nursing home. I know you told "Skeletor Da God" that it is not a nursing home, but the Internets and the Googles suggest otherwise, Lucas.

 

[Maxxicus Callahan]

Yeah Gen Z, invite the Wern to a party during COVID don’t be greedy agephobes.

The Wern at the party… “Hey fellow kids let me tell you a story about Oliver Dangle and Rowdy Pete I want to overthrow capitalism and make everything free under anarcho-communism. Did I mention older men possess better sperm for stronger healthier baby DNA.”

Teenagers at the party… ugh, who invited this middle aged homeless man? He stinks of piss and rotting onions.

 

[Jeep1971]

Once again proving he thinks women are chattel.

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He posted more of his story, so I'll be reading that later tonight.

Another gem.

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"THEY don't want to share any information about women".
Let that sink in.
WTF? What information does he need? Does he really think someone is hiding all the zoomer chicks from him?

 

[Wernology]

So I put bumcel into a youtube search and this came up

Apparently another wernologist making clips of questionable things lucas has said. too bad the autistic owls didn't bring that clip up live last night to see how he reacted to it. would have been hilarious to see him try to talk his way out of that one

Also, fucking lol at this one

Oh, that user usually shows up in my chats and I THINK was in the Outcast Owls one last night!

 

[A whole lotta nope]

love this self own here declaring he only has $15 at the start of the month is hilarious, “you know nothing of this struggle.” .

Yeah these women don’t know of this struggle because they aren’t wards of the state that can’t take care of themselves. Why would a strong independent woman want a weak defective broke bum if she is able to independently choose anybody else besides President Wern with only $15 to his name and a worse attitude to match the tiny size of his dick and wallet.

Lucas will never understand why women are not attracted to men who do nothing for themselves and expect a woman to stoop down to pity fucking them out of charity for the poor bumcel.

He's such a buffoon. We women can be strong and independent by taking care of OURSELVES (and children if they exist). According to Lucas' screwed up logic, because women won't take care of his sorry ass, we can't be strong nor independent. He doesn't get it that most people want to date someone on their level. Therefore we want a man who can hold his own and take care of himself, has ambition, etc. No one wants to cater to a big whiny fuckin' man baby. NO ONE.

It's still funny to me that he thinks that every time people of the opposite sex congregate, it's a romantic/sexual situation. Never mind that it could be a group of friends, family, coworkers, etc. What a strange one-track mind he has.

 

[Twrx]

Yeah Gen Z, invite the Wern to a party during COVID don’t be greedy agephobes.

The Wern at the party… “Hey fellow kids let me tell you a story about Oliver Dangle and my vision for overthrowing capitalism and replacing it with anarcho-communism. Did I mention older men possess better sperm for stronger healthier baby DNA.”

Teenagers at the party… ugh, who invited this middle aged homeless man? He stinks of piss and rotting onions.

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I think this speaks volumes about how entirely alone he has spent his life due to his toxic behavior. He sees a group of people and automatically assumes everyone is fucking. The thought of friendship is completely alien to him. He only views people in what he believes they can do for him. Probably something Myrna does as well. It's a learned behavior.

 

[Tard Police]

He's slowly starting to return to his usual "Stop hoarding all the women Gen Z!!!" Rhetoric. That "More than one chick to a dude" meme was the kind of stuff he'd spend all day chimping about at the peak of his unmedicated hallucinations. I'm slightly wondering if he's about to come full circle back to it as he seems to do with his fixations. That could potentially spell out disaster for the Mallon saga. A sexually frustrated Lucas in full rutting animal mode is a ticking time bomb.

 

[Wernology]

He's slowly starting to return to his usual "Stop hoarding all the women Gen Z!!!" Rhetoric. That "More than one chick to a dude" meme was the kind of stuff he'd spend all day chimping about at the peak of his unmedicated hallucinations. I'm slightly wondering if he's about to come full circle back to it as he seems to do with his fixations. That could potentially spell out disaster for the Mallon saga. A sexually frustrated Lucas in full rutting animal mode is a ticking time bomb.

That's what I'm gunning for: Round two of him being darted by EMTs, strapped down, and hauled off screaming about how Gen Z women won't fuck him to the nuthouse again.

 

[Telomere Savalas]

"THEY don't want to share any information about women".
Let that sink in.
WTF? What information does he need? Does he really think someone is hiding all the zoomer chicks from him?

They were all at Bistango I thought?

 

[WonderWino]

That's what I'm gunning for: Round two of him being darted by EMTs, strapped down, and hauled off screaming about how Gen Z women won't fuck him to the nuthouse again.

I picture it going alot like this, with lucas as the bear trying to gorge himself while ranting about zoomer puss puss

 

[ManfromtheMoon]

It ain't even spring, and the wern's showing signs of waking up from his hibernation. Oh GOD this is gonna be a disaster if they don't up his dosage

I imagine the wern would escape shawshank style, instead of just leaving through the window like a normal person or dig a hole through the wall like in the movie. Lucass in true retard fashion would dig a hole underground and come out outside Mallon's place. Spreading the word on how sketchy the place is and how they increase his food portions which made him fat. This would lead to dudebros finally respecting him and telling him where the parties at, and finally getting a hot, fit, attractive korean GEN Z BAE with dem thicc thighs. Lucas would finally be able to go back to the elk kingdom happy with his child bride.

Only to wake up, with one of the nursing home staff knocking at the door, telling him they need to change his sheets

 

[Wernology]

The plot twist is he wants cashapp to talk about Oliver Dangle further but since he already made a universe where plot doesn't matter and anyone can do anything, Lucas isn't necessary. Anyone can continue going on about Oliver Dangle and Rowdy Pete. I now own the sun in his story and the ability to hoard its light and kill anyone who comes near it so I'm sure he'll love that.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

I was laughing too when he said I don’t want them to make the bed for me I want to make the bed myself, I doubt that but it’s so funny he denies it’s a nursing home when they have to change sheets for him.

One of my favorite Lucas slips in the last year or so is when he was talking about not wearing underwear, and he said "Whats the point? To catch the turds rolling down my legs?"

Once again proving he thinks women are chattel.

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He posted more of his story, so I'll be reading that later tonight.

Another gem.

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Lucas: "You're a class traitor if you don't date a guy who only gets $15 a month."
Also Lucas: "Marry me so you can be Queen of the multimillion-dollar Elk Kingdom that I will inherit"

The plot twist is he wants cashapp to talk about Oliver Dangle further but since he already made a universe where plot doesn't matter and anyone can do anything, Lucas isn't necessary. Anyone can continue going on about Oliver Dangle and Rowdy Pete. I now own the sun in his story and the ability to hoard its light and kill anyone who comes near it so I'm sure he'll love that.

Okay 1) "Oliver Dangle" and "Rowdy Pete" sound like gay porn names. Does Lucas think actual male human beings have names like those?
2) He's really going into this OC route, huh? Soon Lucas will be talking about "closed characters" in the Werner Tardverse who you can only talk about if you Cashapp him $50 or Doordash him a pizza.

 

[Wernology]

One of my favorite Lucas slips in the last year or so is when he was talking about not wearing underwear, and he said "Whats the point? To catch the turds rolling down my legs?"

Lucas: "You're a class traitor if you don't date a guy who only gets $15 a month."
Also Lucas: "Marry me so you can be Queen of the multimillion-dollar Elk Kingdom that I will inherit"


Okay 1) "Oliver Dangle" and "Rowdy Pete" sound like gay porn names. Does Lucas think actual male human beings have names like those?
2) He's really going into this OC route, huh? Soon Lucas will be talking about "closed characters" in the Werner Tardverse who you can only talk about if you Cashapp him $50 or Doordash him a pizza.

It's already been decided that Rowdy Pete is a Yosemite Sam-like bear and Oliver Dangle is a power bottom. They are a couple that Oliver's nebulous wife does not know about.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

It's already been decided that Rowdy Pete is a Yosemite Sam-like bear and Oliver Dangle is a power bottom. They are a couple that Oliver's nebulous wife does not know about.

Even in his tardverse fiction, its the side characters getting action while President Pedofreak and his unilateral abolishing of capitalism, the police, the constitution, the entire federal government and GrubHub is still presumably a bumcel unable to find a Gen-Z zoomer bae.

 

[WonderWino]

It ain't even spring, and the wern's showing signs of waking up from his hibernation. Oh GOD this is gonna be a disaster if they don't up his dosage

I imagine the wern would escape shawshank style, instead of just leaving through the window like a normal person or dig a hole through the wall like in the movie. Lucass in true retard fashion would dig a hole underground and come out outside Mallon's place. Spreading the word on how sketchy the place is and how they increase his food portions which made him fat. This would lead to dudebros finally respecting him and telling him where the parties at, and finally getting a hot, fit, attractive korean GEN Z BAE with dem thicc thighs. Lucas would finally be able to go back to the elk kingdom happy with his child bride.

Only to wake up, with one of the nursing home staff knocking at the door, telling him they need to change his sheets

If lucas were to stage an actual escape I can see it going alot like this

Smothering his roommate, smashing the window out and waddling off into the woods of spokane. the 'he really needs a girlfriend' part really ties the whole thing together. Its also eerily similar to how I expect he'd escape from eastern state

 

[Krathnami]

Watching Lucas get to the self-destructive phase of his cycle will be a fascinating demonstration of how well his medications are inhibiting his worst tendencies. I hope they don’t work.

 

[IceQueen]

Probably another excuse of well I wanted to try this time but (x) was stopping me and also narcissists like Lucas tend to readily believe their own lies that they tell others without any hint of self awareness. It seems over time though Lucas has gotten somewhat more realistic about his grandiose plans, a job an apartment and a kitchen to cook in are realistic obtainable goals. For Lucas in his given situation though it’s now as much as a grandiose fantasy as his time travel machine to win the power bowl.

I was laughing too when he said I don’t want them to make the bed for me I want to make the bed myself, I doubt that but it’s so funny he denies it’s a nursing home when they have to change sheets for him.

The bed thing confused me, I know it’s Lucas but like… Why would he say that considering the fact that he absolutely CAN make his own bed? Sure they have staff to do it but I doubt they actually change the bedding every day, so he COULD make the bed himself lmao.

 

[BowlOfDick]

Watching Lucas get to the self-destructive phase of his cycle will be a fascinating demonstration of how well his medications are inhibiting his worst tendencies. I hope they don’t work.

Don’t worry fellow Kiwi.

While it will be some time (owing to the increased level of control the nursing home probably has on him) I believe it won’t be long until we reach the next phase of the Wern Cycle.