Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

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Over eleventy billion hours in mspaint. I think the time was well spent.
 
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I think one of his most pathetic qualities is that he’s completely incapable of being funny, even when he’s trying to in his writing or stand up, or in his witty twitter remarks. I’ve never, once, seen him say anything funny.

Just because he’s a lolcow I genuinely dislike as a human, I could still notice if he was funny occasionally, but he’s utterly devoid of humour. It’s staggering.
 
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Sumptinsfuckey said:
I'm trying to join the OnA forum because it sounds fun but I don't know enough of the lore to pass the melinda test. Any fagautists wanna help?
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Answer is "lobster" or "a lobster". Your account will take a second to get approved but be patient - it will be eventually.
 
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SixPennyWalnut said:
I think one of his most pathetic qualities is that he’s completely incapable of being funny, even when he’s trying to in his writing or stand up, or in his witty twitter remarks. I’ve never, once, seen him say anything funny.

Just because he’s a lolcow I genuinely dislike as a human, I could still notice if he was funny occasionally, but he’s utterly devoid of humour. It’s staggering.
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He's never made me laugh, even once!

To illustrate how truly awful that is, when someone walks into a sauna and says, "It's like a sauna in here", I laugh every time.
 
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Digging through his old annoying blog
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I stopped reading but if you want to put yourself through it

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Assuming this one has been seen before as comments are turned off - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5wf9uv-7R0

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righteous bucks!

Pat confirming he's a Hitchhiker's rip off

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Patrick is basically RLM's nerd crew parody
 
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Mr Moonface said:
He's a biology professor who would do the most edgy 'atheist stunts' for attention.
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This shit cracked me up and FYI, atheiststunts.com is available. I love how Pat ran to a forum to crowdsource a response to a creationist. You know goddamn well he opened his reply with “I can’t believe you don’t get this, but I’m used to explaining basic science to Sky Daddy’s kids with extra chromosomes” before pasting whatever some random online atheist told him to say.

This guy might be my favorite lolcow of all time. He is way beyond parody and this thread has become a rich source of mirth in my life. TYFYS, comrades!
 
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Mr Moonface said:
It was 6pm Milwaukee time when piggy shat these tweets out. He's already shitfaced and is losing his shit at Rittenhouse, calling him irrelevant:

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Tweeted twice so he could go viral (he didn't).
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Fat Rick says this like he doesn’t dream of some stalker giving him a reason to “defend” himself on camera where that shit goes viral and people buy his books because of it.
 
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Mr Moonface said:
It was 6pm Milwaukee time when piggy shat these tweets out. He's already shitfaced and is losing his shit at Rittenhouse, calling him irrelevant:

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Tweeted twice so he could go viral (he didn't).
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Rittensneed is a tougher man than you'll ever be, Fatrick. And unlike you, he's actually been in a fight and walked away.

Edit: And despite appearances, Kyle's thinner than you too.
 
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Mr Moonface said:
It gets worse. Pat and his (now) ex-wife had matching Mustangs, and her model (00 GT) was nicer than his (97 GT), no wonder she left him.

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What a terrible, fat writer. You would describe an elderly person exercising as, "walking briskly," but you would not characterize your supposedly fast car as having, "accelerated briskly," that is just retarded.
 
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moocow said:
Since he's clearly been an insufferable asshole his entire life, how on earth did he find not one but two different women willing to marry him and put up with his shit long enough to have kids with him?
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Because the incel hypothesis is bullshit. Even the most obnoxious jerk-ass scumbag can get laid and even get some dumb bitch to pump out his tard baby if he's persistent enough. Please tell me this guy is a Chad.
 
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