Bad Game Reviews - Did you actually play the damn game?

Bennytehsmeghead said:
Oh, yeah. But still, my point still stands: The critique shouldn't be on the humour change, it should be on how it feels to GO POSTAL.

Basically, this is a massive problem with bad game reviews: When it comes to gameplay-driven properties, they focus on the superficial aspects, rather than the core gameplay.
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That's not the only thing Postal is meant to be good at but okay, in Postal 4 you have a fraction of the arsenal you had available in Postal 2 so you're more limited in terms of how you conduct mayhem. There is no biological weapons that spread diseases or six different shotguns that do damage in a different way. Plus, the NPC's got de-gorified, as in when they're burning alive they don't run around and then beg for their lives crawling like they did in Postal 2, so the factor of enjoying the suffering of the NPC's got nerfed. And the machete in Postal 4 fucking sucks, to get it about where it was in Postal 2 you need to find some stupid pills and then you can go crazy for a certain amount of time.

And humor aside, Postal 4 is buggier than the current Steam version of Postal 2 without the xPatch, so various issues will take enjoyment away from the experience. Not to mention random empty rooms or unfinished houses. Even Postal 2 didn't have those at release. RWS bit off more than they could chew with P4 and it shows. Oh yeah, keep in mind that over time RWS' fandom got invaded by the Reddit tranny menace, leading to a division where one part of the fandom loves Postal 4 for it's wacky poop sex haha humor and the other part which thinks that Postal 4 got retardified and is generally a bigger mess than Postal 2 so in their opinion Postal 4 sucks. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if Postal 4 is what it is because RWS didn't want to get cancelled by the new fandom.
 
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Slav Power said:
That's not the only thing Postal is meant to be good at but okay, in Postal 4 you have a fraction of the arsenal you had available in Postal 2 so you're more limited in terms of how you conduct mayhem. There is no biological weapons that spread diseases or six different shotguns that do damage in a different way. Plus, the NPC's got de-gorified, as in when they're burning alive they don't run around and then beg for their lives crawling like they did in Postal 2, so the factor of enjoying the suffering of the NPC's got nerfed. And the machete in Postal 4 fucking sucks, to get it about where it was in Postal 2 you need to find some stupid pills and then you can go crazy for a certain amount of time.

And humor aside, Postal 4 is buggier than the current Steam version of Postal 2 without the xPatch, so various issues will take enjoyment away from the experience. Not to mention random empty rooms or unfinished houses. Even Postal 2 didn't have those at release. RWS bit off more than they could chew with P4 and it shows. Oh yeah, keep in mind that over time RWS' fandom got invaded by the Reddit tranny menace, leading to a division where one part of the fandom loves Postal 4 for it's wacky poop sex haha humor and the other part which thinks that Postal 4 got retardified and is generally a bigger mess than Postal 2 so in their opinion Postal 4 sucks. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if Postal 4 is what it is because RWS didn't want to get cancelled by the new fandom.
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For god's sake, just admit you're a biased fan troll!
 
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ADN_VIII said:
I'm surprised QuantumTVs review of Elden Ring isn't in this thread.

This actual nigger went into Elden Ring and whined that the game didn't have an easy mode and because it's not made for everyone it shouldn't have been made.
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This game has an easy mode and it's called legendary spirit ashes (honestly, any of them, not just mimic tears) + 10.
 
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Sunflower Samurai said:
Postal 2 has gotten an interesting semi-ironic fanbase that wanks off the toilet humor/gore and the good(tm) political digs

It has an amount of edgier trannies and it has some overlap with the new "Boomer-shooter" community thats also semi tranny filled
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POSTAL 4. I was referring to Postal 4.
 
I don't have the link but Jim Sterling's review of BOTW was absolute ass. He's either to fat to notice or straight up lied about things in the game. Like how Shrines changed color combinations depending on whether you had completed it, found before or if it was new to you. I believe it was the latter because BOTW was causing more excitement than Horizon and was gonna beat OoT on Metacritic.

Also Patrick Klepek covering his eyes while playing Yakuza 0.
 
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I'll add a new one from Cvit who was featured here before. His Yazkua 2 review:

Besides being way way way too long and being just the same arguments over and over again (basically Kiwami bad, original good) there are two especially bad points:
1. Criticizing Kiwami's Yakuza 6 system for having to grind several hours to max everything IN THE BEGINNING OF THE GAME. I have no idea why he doesn't understand he needs to just play the game and he'll be fairly leveled from it being a 20 hours game. In the end he says he just used a mod to be max level.
2. Criticizing any change made in Kiwami 2 because change = bad. Which wouldn't had been as bad if he didn't go full autist and had fights spliced with MG Revengenance soundtrack for maximum cringe levels.
 
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wtfNeedSignUp said:
I'll add a new one from Cvit who was featured here before. His Yazkua 2 review:

Besides being way way way too long and being just the same arguments over and over again (basically Kiwami bad, original good) there are two especially bad points:
1. Criticizing Kiwami's Yakuza 6 system for having to grind several hours to max everything IN THE BEGINNING OF THE GAME. I have no idea why he doesn't understand he needs to just play the game and he'll be fairly leveled from it being a 20 hours game. In the end he says he just used a mod to be max level.
2. Criticizing any change made in Kiwami 2 because change = bad. Which wouldn't had been as bad if he didn't go full autist and had fights spliced with MG Revengenance soundtrack for maximum cringe levels.
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Seems to be a common trend for him to find a way to either exploit a game's leveling system to level up fast or just outright cheat, game journalist levels of incompetence.
 
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KokoroKoroki said:
Seems to be a common trend for him to find a way to either exploit a game's leveling system to level up fast or just outright cheat, game journalist levels of incompetence.
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To be fair isnt it common for people to exploit leveling system in jrpgs ( a genre notorious for grinding ) also hes right og 2 > kiwami 2 and besides he has some points like the decision to remake it in dragon engine,plus cut content and sega not allowing anyone to buy the og yakuza 1 and 2
 
Darsheel said:
To be fair isnt it common for people to exploit leveling system in jrpgs ( a genre notorious for grinding ) also hes right og 2 > kiwami 2 and besides he has some points like the decision to remake it in dragon engine,plus cut content and sega not allowing anyone to buy the og yakuza 1 and 2
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It's less the points themselves and more how he reaches those conclusions to begin with, some games might be grindy but complaining about it after essentially cheating your way to overlevelling yourself and turning the game into a cakewalk feels quite dishonest.
 
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Surprised nobody mentioned how biased Deathloop’s review actually is. If you played it ofc.



The accolades further proves it.
 

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I'm kind of cheating with this since it isn't necessarily a bad game review but more a bad review of certain game mechanics:
To put it simply, he does not like when games switch between voiced and unvoiced dialogue as he finds it immersion breaking and jarring.

There are a myriad of reasons why a game may choose to skimp out on VA work, be it budget, type of game, or maybe even the creator's own vision but he does not delve into any of that, instead, he complains about the numerous times he felt his immersion was broken in games like Yakuza and Metro: Exodus because he had to switch from listening to dialogue to reading dialogue and that he finds unsynced lip flaps off putting (which isn't necessarily incorrect, just rather nitpicky in the context of what's important in a game.)

It feels more like he's complaining that games aren't more like movies and that all games should try to voice all their dialogue because budget be damned, although you can find more criticisms in the comment section.

Side note: Why the fuck would you complain about the English acting in Metro when the VAs are supposed to be Russian? The game clearly wants you to play in Russian as that's where the game is set, no shit the English acting is gonna be off putting since English isn't their first language and isn't even the option you're supposed to go with.
 
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A classic example of how coping does not make for a good review.

@KokoroKoroki Editing seems to not let me quote your post, but the thing with Yakuza in general is how easy it is to break it with how sub-stories work. In Yakuza 2 and especially in kiwami 2, if you do every sub story in your first play through you become way too op. By the mid to late game everything becomes a cake walk, especially the final boss. However, by his definition every video game with a leveling system is completely easy since they all have a way to exploit it. That is an oversight even developers miss and require at least some research and time for players to even find out. What cvit does is basically google the ways to break a game (not even finding them by himself) and marks those "exploits" as a negative aspect of the game. Which is something incredibly pretentious and lazy.
 
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Miller said:
That time Polygon thought that it was a good idea to have Ben Kuchera review a VR gun game.

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Dude even throws like a bitch in VR. He's the guy you hear about who shot himself in the leg cleaning his gun. Clear the weapon dummy.

On the subject of bad reviews, IGN did Days Gone dirty. They gave it a 6. It wasn't a game changer or a triumph of game design but it was fun as fuck. I may be biased because it combines three things I love motorcycles, zombies, and a good open world. It was most certainly not a 6/10.
 
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Jeff_the_Thriller said:
On the subject of bad reviews, IGN did Days Gone dirty. They gave it a 6. It wasn't a game changer or a triumph of game design but it was fun as fuck. I may be biased because it combines three things I love motorcycles, zombies, and a good open world. It was most certainly not a 6/10.
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I like Days Gone, I got it on Steam. The journos hated it just because the main protagonist was a huwite man. Days Gone didn't try to re-invent the wheel (no pun intended), it was just a decent open world zombie survival game.
 
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I don't know what you two are smoking but Days Gone is fucking awful. Angry biker trash mc that's constantly squabbling with talk radio while hunting down copy pasted zombie nests to torch in between bouts of scrounging for more gas to power his hilariously inefficient boomer bike. I gave that shitheap a fair shake and I wish I had went with my gut instead.
 
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