Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

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1997 Toyota Tacoma said:
How long can certified stalker-child @1997 Toyota Tacoma get away with it?

The texts are funny content, the O&A forum is funny, I guess it's what I get for back seat modding an O&A poster, touché.

Edit: The Nikocado ass is a horrifying but funny touch.
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You appear to either enjoy filthy intercourse with male humans or enjoy picking on the handicapped*

Either way well done old bean

*obviously the second one, you are a farms poster after all
 
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The I Scream Man said:
You appear to either enjoy filthy intercourse with male humans or enjoy picking on the handicapped*

Either way well done old bean

*obviously the second one, you are a farms poster after all
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I'm not Patrick, I can admit when I'm wrong or out-gunned, and I'm certainly not here to feud with the funny milk-producing community of my favorite porcine lolcow.
 
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The Patitioner said:
Fat proudly stated he used to send pics of himself with a rage boner to trolls. I don't believe him because the OnA boys would have immediately reshared it to anyone vaguely related to the Patosphere
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I dunno man electron microscope images can be hard to interpret for the untrained, maybe he did send them but the Rascals just didnt know what they were looking at.
 
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ImportantOpinions said:
If you guys are interested in the comedic genius of Patrick Tomlinson, look him up on reddit. His username is u/patrickstomlinson because important celebrities use their real name in their reddit account. Forget the pages upon pages of responding to comments and sort by "submitted" until you get to the one reason Patrick used reddit: standupshots.

If you don't know standupshots, it's a place for amateur comedians to post a picture of themself with one of their jokes over it. Most use it to promote themselves, network, maybe get some constructive feedback, but Pat of course used it to demand validation for his comedy and fight with anyone who disagreed.

It's about half "orange man bad" punchlines but the best ones are the fucking ESSAYS he writes where he forgets he's supposed to be funny and just yammers on like an autistic child.

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“Left to EEK out an existence”…
Professional author here, little baby childs.
 
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ImportantOpinions said:
It's about half "orange man bad" punchlines but the best ones are the fucking ESSAYS he writes where he forgets he's supposed to be funny and just yammers on like an autistic child.
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Stephen King is a lolcow, but he gives good advice to aspiring writers: “Kill your babies.” Meaning remove the lines you think are clever or brilliant if they don’t move the narrative forward. Patrick is so enamored with himself that I wouldn’t be shocked if he never gets beyond writing a rough draft. “When I went to edit it, I found that there were no mistakes to correct or changes to make, child. I’m sorry you’re stupid.”
 
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ImportantOpinions said:
If you guys are interested in the comedic genius of Patrick Tomlinson, look him up on reddit. His username is u/patrickstomlinson because important celebrities use their real name in their reddit account. Forget the pages upon pages of responding to comments and sort by "submitted" until you get to the one reason Patrick used reddit: standupshots.

If you don't know standupshots, it's a place for amateur comedians to post a picture of themself with one of their jokes over it. Most use it to promote themselves, network, maybe get some constructive feedback, but Pat of course used it to demand validation for his comedy and fight with anyone who disagreed.

It's about half "orange man bad" punchlines but the best ones are the fucking ESSAYS he writes where he forgets he's supposed to be funny and just yammers on like an autistic child.

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His sci-fi writing is better than this. That's how bad this is.
 
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John Andrews Stan said:
Stephen King is a lolcow, but he gives good advice to aspiring writers: “Kill your babies.” Meaning remove the lines you think are clever or brilliant if they don’t move the narrative forward. Patrick is so enamored with himself that I wouldn’t be shocked if he never gets beyond writing a rough draft. “When I went to edit it, I found that there were no mistakes to correct or changes to make, child. I’m sorry you’re stupid.”
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The Tommyknockers is a better sci-fi novel than anything Patrick has ever written, and it's a nonsensical coked out trainwreck of a book. He isn't fit to even to pick up coffee for 80s cokehead Stephen King. And 80s cokehead King was fucking AWFUL at writing.
 
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W00K #17 said:
The Tommyknockers is a better sci-fi novel than anything Patrick has ever written, and it's a nonsensical coked out trainwreck of a book. He isn't fit to even to pick up coffee for 80s cokehead Stephen King. And 80s cokehead King was fucking AWFUL at writing.
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I'd argue cokehead king is better than modern day sober king.
 
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John Andrews Stan said:
Stephen King is a lolcow, but he gives good advice to aspiring writers: “Kill your babies.” Meaning remove the lines you think are clever or brilliant if they don’t move the narrative forward. Patrick is so enamored with himself that I wouldn’t be shocked if he never gets beyond writing a rough draft. “When I went to edit it, I found that there were no mistakes to correct or changes to make, child. I’m sorry you’re stupid.”
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On Writing is Stephen King's best work. He's a douchebag lolcow, but his advice is solid.
 
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John Andrews Stan said:
Stephen King is a lolcow, but he gives good advice to aspiring writers: “Kill your babies.” Meaning remove the lines you think are clever or brilliant if they don’t move the narrative forward. Patrick is so enamored with himself that I wouldn’t be shocked if he never gets beyond writing a rough draft. “When I went to edit it, I found that there were no mistakes to correct or changes to make, child. I’m sorry you’re stupid.”
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Also his publisher probably doesn't want to bother, so when Fatirck sends in his first full draft they just glance over it and tell him "Yeah, great, no editing needed you're a genius Patirck" so he doesn't argue with them. They know his books don't sell and it's nothing but contractual obligation or some form of nepotism at this point.

Imagine an editor having to talk to Fat Rick about changing stuff. "No, child, this line is perfect and does not need changing. No, child, the story is advanced with this. You're too stupid to understand this. No, child, an adult character getting hot and bothered watching kids in the locker room is integral to the plot. Ask the SFWA about how important it is to watch kids getting naked."
 
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