Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

Sorry for the double post. Fatty got super excited about sodomizing Trump this week and I just remembered this little blast from the past (and just in case someone needs a reminder why Porker deserves every single thing that has happened in the last 42 years).
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Easiest man to hate in the history of mankind. You've NO ideia how much I loved discovering God gave him a shriveled piglet dick.
God I fucking hate twitter. There is no fucking way this happened tim, fatso just imagined it after he saw a boomer saying boomer stuff. What rick actually did was call the police on a man who went a bar while he wasn't there and then got laughed out of court about it. He's also actually fat. Really fat.
 
Is any serious writer actually aiming for the word count in their books? Shouldn’t it be more of “when I was inspired I wrote some parts of the book, together it came up to be 1000 pages.” While Pat does “only 50 k words more of that slop and I can finally push it on the shelves.” Feels really like a student who hates writing struggling with an essay for school.
 
Is any serious writer actually aiming for the word count in their books? Shouldn’t it be more of “when I was inspired I wrote some parts of the book, together it came up to be 1000 pages.” While Pat does “only 50 k words more of that slop and I can finally push it on the shelves.” Feels really like a student who hates writing struggling with an essay for school.
He doesn't even like writing. He likes telling people he's an author but that's it. He loves tweeting and has no issues with hitting 1,000+ words a day on twitter. Writing is a chore to him
 
I suppose it would be illegal for someone other than Patirck to publish a book of his tweets. Too bad.

Some time ago, Josh Groban put music to and sang some of Kanye’s tweets for a late night show. I’m starting to feel inspired.
Josh Groban sings Nosh Growman.

Yes, puns are the lowest form of humor, but Science Fantasy with diagrams of ships shaped like butt plugs is the lowest form of literature.
 
Remember fatty autistically spamming this to all the Twitter Blue users he saw?
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or one month ago when he said he would block them on sight?

Well, his favorite transgender became a Twitter Blue subscriber lol
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But trannies can do no wrong, child, so I'm sure he'll find a way to cope about this instead of comitting heresy by mildly criticizing a crossdresser. Except John is not even trans according to the Pig:
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from Oct 2021

Nikki has donated money to John's political career back in 2019, but lately it's all earmarked for AOC so maybe once she learned it was a troon she got jelous because she knows Pat lusts after them:
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Remember fatty autistically spamming this to all the Twitter Blue users he saw?
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or one month ago when he said he would block them on sight?

Well, his favorite transgender became a Twitter Blue subscriber lol
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But trannies can do no wrong, child, so I'm sure he'll find a way to cope about this instead of comitting heresy by mildly criticizing a crossdresser. Except John is not even trans according to the Pig:
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from Oct 2021

Nikki has donated money to John's political career back in 2019, but lately it's all earmarked for AOC so maybe once she learned it was a troon she got jelous because she knows Pat lusts after them:
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SpaceEdge asked Rick about this

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Pat is the absolute epitome of “true lolcows reject advice” which makes him that much more entertaining.

A lot of times I’ll feel bad when reading through threads of cows with actual disabilities. Pat, however, is just a fat faggot who postures as an expert on whatever the popular press’s Current Thing is. As a result, this thread somehow manages to bring a smile to my face daily.

Side note: Many people might not know this, but Pat is also a comically obese retard.
 
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Sorry for the double post. Fatty got super excited about sodomizing Trump this week and I just remembered this little blast from the past (and just in case someone needs a reminder why Porker deserves every single thing that has happened in the last 42 years).
View attachment 4125012

Easiest man to hate in the history of mankind. You've NO ideia how much I loved discovering God gave him a shriveled piglet dick.

He cannot 'child' people in real life who are older than him.

Shame something like that holds back such a slim, sexy man, who knows everything.
 
To be fair the things he writes on Twitter are more entertaining and better fiction than his books. The funniest thing about that though is that he's serious, he is just like that. Also fat.

That is a hilarious caveat to all of this. But don't forget that he's not coming up with (I'll be kind) a quarter of his own tweets on his own. He legit plagiarizes other people's tweets.


Someone did the math recently and estimated that Patrick has written the equivalent of 30+ (!) books with all of his tweets.

The math is something like # of tweets (178k) x average number of words/tweet (15) ÷ by avg # of words in a full length novel (80k). He basically tweets the equivalent of 3 books/year.

For someone to do that math on Pat and his tweets has to have more time on their hands and autism than I care to think about. However,. It's still impressive. Not Pat, he's a fat faggot. The calculations some did on him.
 
Hard to believe it's already been over 2 years since his last box office bomb. Will be interesting to see him try to sell this one. It's hard enough with all the wannabe Stephen Kings to convince a publisher to throw down big money to publish and distribute your work. Trying to do so with sales numbers In the Red has to be next to impossible.
Someone with some insider knowledge said that he had been trying to pitch to publishers at the latest Worldcon and came across as a bit sweaty, desperate and unhinged.

Even if Pat was just a jolly fatty beloved by everyone, he would be given the same advice - do not write a fucking Christmas book. They can only be sold at a very specific release schedule (the weeks leading up to December) and for a traditional publisher, the background work of *exactly* timing a book release to a ceertain time of the year is both problematic and costly, which is why theme books by authors are usually from big names.

Who is going to buy a Christmas book after December 25th? It's never going to have the "long tail" that might turn a shitty selling book to one that breaks even. Writers who have done Christmas-themed books only do them as a side-project, not a two-year epic swallowing up all their writing time.

In two years he could not come up with a better idea??
 
38,665 words in 2 years is about 53 words per day. How does that stack up to professional writers, you may ask?
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:tomlinson:
Low hanging fruit but I'm gonna compare him to my current favorite fantasy/sci-fi author, Brandon Sanderson. Here's what he posted on his own website: Link

What Is Your Daily Wordcount/Time Goal?​



I write every day, and I give myself wordcount goals. (Usually, it’s 2k min, or a certain page goal if revising). It varies though. 10 pages is often my goal. I usually hit it, and sometimes do much more. I write faster at the end of a book than the beginning. Also, some days I write for four or five hours–some days I write fourteen or sixteen. Pretty consistently, I’ve done around 300k words a year for the last few years. Last year I pushed very hard and got around 400k.

I try to keep distractions to a minimum. I write at night, so there’s less noise. I also set aside one day a week for business matters: answering emails, signing things for my store, phone calls with my agent, etc. I’m lucky enough to have assistants I can trust. I don’t have to get distracted by day to day interruptions because I know my assistants will deal with most of it, and only ask me about things that really need my input, and most of them can wait until my business day.

Do you ever take a break? It seems like you’re always doing something.

I went out to dinner with my wife for our anniversary last night. Does that count? The truth is, I love what I do. So if I have time when I’m not doing something else, I work on books.

What is your writing schedule like, and do you ever give yourself a day off?

Do I ever give myself a day off? Usually, if I give myself a day off, it’s because I’ve just been killing myself. Going and doing book signings and things like that.

I write to relax. That’s what I do for fun. If I go on vacation I usually want to go on vacation to get away from everyone so I can write. It’s just what I love to do. My writing schedule is usually … most writers write twenty-four hours a day, I write twenty-four hours a day. I go to the gym, I’m thinking about what’s happening with my next book. If I’m going to bed, I’m planning for the next day. When I get up, I check my e-mail, start writing.

Most days, usually, formally, I write from about noon until four, and then I’ll hang out with my family and do other stuff until about ten, and I’ll start writing from about ten until midnight. No from about ten until 4AM.

What was your average daily wordcount when working as a part time writer?

I was a special case, as I intentionally picked a job where I could write at work. I shot for 2000 words a day. I suggest to new writers that 2k a week be a minimum. That gives you a book in about a year.

Amazing what you can do when you have a family to take care of and are also determined to have your main income be from the novels you sell. It also helps if you have genuine talent and passion to write.
 
Someone with some insider knowledge said that he had been trying to pitch to publishers at the latest Worldcon and came across as a bit sweaty, desperate and unhinged.

Even if Pat was just a jolly fatty beloved by everyone, he would be given the same advice - do not write a fucking Christmas book. They can only be sold at a very specific release schedule (the weeks leading up to December) and for a traditional publisher, the background work of *exactly* timing a book release to a ceertain time of the year is both problematic and costly, which is why theme books by authors are usually from big names.

Who is going to buy a Christmas book after December 25th? It's never going to have the "long tail" that might turn a shitty selling book to one that breaks even. Writers who have done Christmas-themed books only do them as a side-project, not a two-year epic swallowing up all their writing time.

In two years he could not come up with a better idea??
The only exception to this rule that I know of is when an established market writer can promote enough interest in a Christmas book among a list of better-known established authors that s/he can sell this project to an editor on the basis of the participation of that list of authors.

Let's say our market writer, call him Thomas Diskant, has a decent record as a gun for hire, writing marketable titles and delivering reliably. He decides to sell the idea of a coffee table book compiling chapters from other, more famous authors. He goes to his editor and sells her on giving him a shot at this concept. She decides it's worth a shot and puts him to work on it.

The next year is his personal hell. He has to beat the bushes to find authors who are willing to do the work for the rate he can pay. Maybe Mario Puzo will be offended by the assumption that he wants to do another Mafia-related work, only to be reassured that the theme is Christmas, not the Mob, and he writes a warm and inviting story of an Italian Christmas in his family. Perhaps Taylor Swift can be persuaded to write an account of a Christmas concert she played at. Big names in a decent variety of fields will ensure that the resulting book has something for almost anyone. It's marketable.

But our author/editor is on the clock. The galleys have to be ready about July, I'd think, and if a particular author dithers too long, fuck you, you lose. The relentless arithmetic of the budget and schedule will dictate more of the decisions than any aesthetic considerations. This book is meant to make money, because Thomas Diskant has bills to pay too.

Do I need to explain the vast gulf between Diskant and Tomlinson here? Fat Rick couldn't come close to closing this deal. He has no track record, no connections, no talent, no concept, no drive, no ability to deliver. No editor with a working brain would give him this concept to run with. It would be a waste of time.

Incidentally, this hypothetical scenario was written by the late Donald Westlake as "A Likely Story". A veteran writer like Westlake would know the ins and outs of an effort like this. It's a good book. If you need to pick between this book and I've if Tomlinson's, I'm very disappointed in you.
 
Someone with some insider knowledge said that he had been trying to pitch to publishers at the latest Worldcon and came across as a bit sweaty, desperate and unhinged.
This is hilarious to imagine. Fat's personality seems like the exact opposite of someone who'd be good at selling things. Sure, he can lie, but he's so abrasive and obtuse about everything. He has no friends, his family doesn't invite him to holidays, and all his clothes are too tight. He takes pictures of himself with visible saliva on his fucking chin and posts them online. How could he possibly convince anyone to buy anything, let alone something he created? He seems so proud of calling his one book "the hunt for red october, but in space!" as if it's not a soulless attempt to trick people into thinking his book is good by attaching it to a well known movie.

And you just know when he gets rejected he's childing them in his mind. He wants to scream and tell them to BUY and NEVER REFUND.
 
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"simaid" huh? credit to AliceWorquer @ OnA for noticing that this isn't just some random misspelling: Simaid is a high cholesterol and heart disease medication
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This comes mere weeks after his totally amazing checkup that prompted him to get back to the gym and a few months after leaking he had a brochure about sleep apnea laying around.

His "health at every size" not-fat-in-any-medical-sense delusions have come crumbling down. Pray for him.
 
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