DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Penix]

For those of you who haven't seen it yet, DSP ranting about some stationary delivery driver fucking up his DoorDash order for the umpteenth time:

It is likely the GPS those delivery drivers use route them through his back gate, which apparently is inaccessible for anything other than emergency services.
So instead, they have to drive all the way to the front gate and back up again into his gated community.
This takes about 5 minutes + extra for having to fuck around getting into the front gate.

So to put things in perspective:

Instead of eating up this inconvenience for living in his retarded safe space, waddling to the driver at the back gate (marked in red) and pick up his slop over the fence, he just fucking expects people to take time out of their actual busy schedule and eat the time it takes to drive all the way back to the snort fort through the front gate.

Mind you, the time it takes to detour back to the front gate and getting to little prince's doorstep probably takes as long as it would've taken to get the order delivered in the first place.
No wonder drivers just drop it off at the back gate lmao.

Side note: added in the left corner to indicate where probably 95% of his DoorDash orders come from, laziness is a hell of a thing.

Why walk up and down for 2 minutes when you can rant about it for 26 minutes to your hugbox?

 

[ReentryPhantom]

Yo I'd pay like $5 if someone made a shitty indie game of DSP searching his gated community for his DoorDash order. A roguelike game where the DoorDash could be on any of the 33 stoops in his community.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Instead of eating up this inconvenience for living in his retarded safe space, waddling to the driver at the back gate (marked in red) and pick up his slop over the fence, he just fucking expects people to take time out of their actual busy schedule and eat the time it takes to drive all the way back to the snort fort through the front gate.

Mind you, the time it takes to detour back to the front gate and getting to little prince's doorstep probably takes as long as it would've taken to get the order delivered in the first place.
No wonder drivers just drop it off at the back gate lmao.

Phail always says that he gives "detailed" instructions on how to get through to his community. How much do you wanna bet that instead of "turn left from SE Petrovitsky Rd to 111th Ave SE, other road is closed" he writes a 12 paragraph short story and when the drivers see that they're like "fuck reading all that shit."

 

[LilypaCastsUpper]

I love the irony of Kat being by far the greatest detractor of all. She told him she likes to cook and clean, when in reality she likes to eat and play action rpgs. Haha.

And he probably doesn't like to the leave the house because being separated from his liquor sippy cup gives him anxiety.

 

[Overdrive MASK_de_SMITH]

He keeps talking about the time he got multiple spots for evo.... does anyone know how high he placed that year?

DSP got first place in EVO East in both 2006 and 2007.

Here's footage of his match against Justin Wong in EVO East 2K6. For what it's worth, he did pretty well.

EvoEast 2k6 Hyper SF2 Finals 08) Justin Wong Vs. DSP

Final Match of the Finals of Hyper Street Fighter 2 at Evolution East 2006 Fighting Game Championships:(1P) Justin Wong Vs. (2P) DarksydePhil - Grand FinalsB...

www.youtube.com

 

[Elescondido]

DSP got first place in EVO East in both 2006 and 2007.

Here's footage of his match against Justin Wong in EVO East 2K6. For what it's worth, he did pretty well.

EvoEast 2k6 Hyper SF2 Finals 08) Justin Wong Vs. DSP

Final Match of the Finals of Hyper Street Fighter 2 at Evolution East 2006 Fighting Game Championships:(1P) Justin Wong Vs. (2P) DarksydePhil - Grand FinalsB...

www.youtube.com

wait so it was even the real evo?
It's even worse than i thought lol

 

[ZehnBoat]

Phail always says that he gives "detailed" instructions on how to get through to his community. How much do you wanna bet that instead of "turn left from SE Petrovitsky Rd to 111th Ave SE, other road is closed" he writes a 12 paragraph short story and when the drivers see that they're like "fuck reading all that shit."

hello driver, it is me, darksydephil, here with detailed instructions
but first i would like to go over my history of navigating streets with a motorized vehicle
[15 paragraphs sometimes mentioning detractors, the car accident, nearly dying, etc.]
and if you could tip me it would really help, okay?

 

[Free Jasper]

After the correctly diagnosed phone-phobia, I wonder how much of the doordash addiction comes from the appeal of minimal human contact.

To collect takeout himself from most these places he’d have to call them to place the order.

 

[EmpGulcasa]

Crisis Core would be a great game for DSP since 75% of it is samey, gacha-sized missions with little to nothing important you need to pay attention to and can mostly mash through and the other 25% is story stuff, most of which is cutscenes and talking heads, or at least the PSP version was. I like the game but can totally see him milking it.

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

After the correctly diagnosed phone-phobia, I wonder how much of the doordash addiction comes from the appeal of minimal human contact.

To collect takeout himself from most these places he’d have to call them to place the order.

What are the odds that Phil opens the door a crack, and takes the food via one of those mechanical grabbing arms?

 

[Inafune Fanfiction]

Is he actually playing Crisis Core that the stupid dent sent to him?

After he wagequit FF7 live on stream? Probably not.

 

[detractorzer0]

After the correctly diagnosed phone-phobia, I wonder how much of the doordash addiction comes from the appeal of minimal human contact.

To collect takeout himself from most these places he’d have to call them to place the order.

One would wonder why someone who can't even formulate his thoughts well enough to make a phone call would dedicate over an hour of their viewers time to listening to them bloviate about nothing.

 

[Vic Viper T301]

If you look up Phil's address on Google Maps, it seems to give an incorrect location. Doordash drivers are not going to read what I'm sure is an obnoxiously long description of how to get to his house. They just follow their GPS, which reports his location as being on a different street, and the nearby streets are a little convoluted.

 

[detractorzer0]

Thats exactly where the driver left it.

If you look up Phil's address on Google Maps, it seems to give an incorrect location. Doordash drivers are not going to read what I'm sure is an obnoxiously long description of how to get to his house. They just follow their GPS, which reports his location as being on a different street, and the nearby streets are a little convoluted.
View attachment 4210862

 

[Cyber Bowling]

After the correctly diagnosed phone-phobia, I wonder how much of the doordash addiction comes from the appeal of minimal human contact.

To collect takeout himself from most these places he’d have to call them to place the order.

I was actually thinking about this with the recent doordash nonsense going on. During the height of the pandemic in my neck of the woods, Doordash was basically the main delivery option, even places that normally did delivery were using the app instead, presumably to cut cost on hiring drivers. I only mention that because, even during the height of "no contact" policies, whenever I used Door Dash the driver always delivered the food directly. There's another streamer I watch who orders fairly frequently, and he always gets up and goes out to get the order as well.

That means Phil is such a paranoid hermit shut in, he refuses to even risk a few seconds of interaction with a delivery driver. Even if you want to be extremely generous and say he's too busy streaming to take all of one minute to waddle downstairs and pick up a bag from a delivery driver, there's no reason he can't have Khet do it.

And I know it's been beaten to death before, but I'll just reiterate how expensive it is to Doordash something instead of picking it up directly, or hell, even ordering delivery from the restaurant. Even when I used their free one month membership, it was about $10 extra between delivery fees/tips. Granted, Phil is probably a shitty tipper, but it's still probably an extra $5 or so when he or Khet could easily pick it up themselves. And when you consider how much they order/how often Phil likes to claim poverty, it's just another example of him lying/being a hypocrite.

Oh, and just to add, I'm in a spot that tend to get a little funky with GPS. I've had delivery people go to the wrong address before, but because I don't leave instructions to just leave it at the door, what tends to happen is I see a car slowly driving, pull into the neighbor's house, but when I walk outside they see me and correctly assume they were at the wrong address. Problem solved. Door dash even notifies you when they're approaching, so you don't have to window lurk or anything.

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

One would wonder why someone who can't even formulate his thoughts well enough to make a phone call would dedicate over an hour of their viewers time to listening to them bloviate about nothing.

Because how else would Phil know how great he is?

 

[LilypaCastsUpper]

His phone-ophobia cope was very weird, about how texting was better because you could "give a thought out response." In a casual conversation, you are kind of playing mental tennis with the person, reacting in real time. It's a level of intimacy that can't be achieved via texting.

DSP wants time to stew and plot his "pigspin," where 'reality' is always one where everything benefits him personally. I mean, it makes perfect sense now that I think about it: he hides and lies so much, that the risk is greatly increased that he will accidentally reveal something he doesn't want to in a phone conversation.

Or, at the very least it will cause excessive stress on him, as he struggles to remember the onion layers of lies in a window of a few seconds where it's appropriate to respond in a phone convo.
And he probably uses different lies with everyone: Kat, Linda, Dave, Inner circle discord dents, regular stream chat dents/detractors, the IRS, [Edit: his M.D.] etc. Must be a stressful existence to juggle all that. He doesn't even do a good job, he just covers up old lies with new, as he loses regular fans and retains only the most devoted of cultists.

 

[Free Jasper]

I was actually thinking about this with the recent doordash nonsense going on. During the height of the pandemic in my neck of the woods, Doordash was basically the main delivery option, even places that normally did delivery were using the app instead, presumably to cut cost on hiring drivers. I only mention that because, even during the height of "no contact" policies, whenever I used Door Dash the driver always delivered the food directly. There's another streamer I watch who orders fairly frequently, and he always gets up and goes out to get the order as well.

That means Phil is such a paranoid hermit shut in, he refuses to even risk a few seconds of interaction with a delivery driver. Even if you want to be extremely generous and say he's too busy streaming to take all of one minute to waddle downstairs and pick up a bag from a delivery driver, there's no reason he can't have Khet do it.

And I know it's been beaten to death before, but I'll just reiterate how expensive it is to Doordash something instead of picking it up directly, or hell, even ordering delivery from the restaurant. Even when I used their free one month membership, it was about $10 extra between delivery fees/tips. Granted, Phil is probably a shitty tipper, but it's still probably an extra $5 or so when he or Khet could easily pick it up themselves. And when you consider how much they order/how often Phil likes to claim poverty, it's just another example of him lying/being a hypocrite.

Oh, and just to add, I'm in a spot that tend to get a little funky with GPS. I've had delivery people go to the wrong address before, but because I don't leave instructions to just leave it at the door, what tends to happen is I see a car slowly driving, pull into the neighbor's house, but when I walk outside they see me and correctly assume they were at the wrong address. Problem solved. Door dash even notifies you when they're approaching, so you don't have to window lurk or anything.

Same tbh. I did my only ever doordash last week when I had a late layover in a city and wanted to try a famous restaurant.

Because I was in an area with lots of hotels, 5-10 mins before it was due I wandered outside, chatted to some smokers then flagged the kid on the scooter down when he turned up.

It really wasn’t fucking hard at all.

 

[Agent Proper]

Same tbh. I did my only ever doordash last week when I had a late layover in a city and wanted to try a famous restaurant.

Because I was in an area with lots of hotels, 5-10 mins before it was due I wandered outside, chatted to some smokers then flagged the kid on the scooter down when he turned up.

It really wasn’t fucking hard at all.

It shouldn't be hard. Any normal person would try to help out their delivery driver. I DoorDash when I get fucked up and get the munchies, if that person delivering my food has any issues with finding my place, I'll keep them on the phone and walk (stumble) a block to get my chow.

Phil is so monumentally entitled that he demands that, these people dropping off his food for a few bucks have to jump through hoops just to not have him go Karen on them. I bet some drivers even blacklisted the Snort Fort. Please always treat food service personnel with respect.

 

[Pandalee’s Tits]

If you look up Phil's address on Google Maps, it seems to give an incorrect location. Doordash drivers are not going to read what I'm sure is an obnoxiously long description of how to get to his house. They just follow their GPS, which reports his location as being on a different street, and the nearby streets are a little convoluted.
View attachment 4210862

I love that this asshole is forced to deal with this bullshit as long as he’s living there beyond his means.