SpergioLeonne
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2022
Mad TV is weird because it grosses me out and is nostalgic at the same time
🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit
- Thread starter PhoBingas
- Start date
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2021
Looks like the Ralphamale is suffering from Ralphedema. Probably due to congestive heart failure, cirrhosis of the liver, kidney disease, or a combo of all 3 plus who knows what else?
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2021
SpergioLeonne
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2022
America First’s true dark secret is that Ralph is an asymptomatic carrier of the deadliest strain of HPV and can only breed once per human women, after which their ovaries burn out, or indefinitely with reptilian or centaur hybrids
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2019
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2021
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- Joined
- Feb 16, 2021
A fifth of Mexican bootleg a day as a baseline isn't slowing down in the slightest. I wonder what's really going on to have Ethanol rethink his drinking habit.
What happened, Ralph? Mansu got under your greasy red skin about your drinking? Is the top of the sektur cucking to a brain-dead horse faced bish? Not really Ralphamale of you faggot.
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2022
Mundane Ralph
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2020
He also claimed yesterday he was getting fucked up every day to spite the alogs because apparently not being a sloppy mess for us to laugh at is letting the haters win.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
That's why he killed himself, too. His drugs destroyed his talent.
He actually really was though. Depp's portrayal of HST was nearly perfect.
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2019
Ralph withdrawal arc! Piggies going to start violently shaking on stream, alert locals to prep for another earthquake
Tiger Jack
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 23, 2020
Only coffee he’s gonna be drinking is Irish coffee. Ralph can’t handle being fully sober at this point, it might actually kill him.
He’ll say he’s sober but he’ll still be at least half cut i‘ll bet. It’s a New Coke situation: Ralph’s been a drunken mess for so long nobody can remember what he’s actually like not running off whiskey and pills.
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2021
There is ZERO chance pig stops drinking. He’s going to continue to drink but keep the majority of it until after his show.
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2016
Reminder that nearly one year and 80 lbs ago, Ralph was Gonna get healthy just to SPITE you MOTHERFUCKERS DO YOU UNDERSTAND!?
Ralphs the kind of person who signs up for planet fitness for the free pizza and doughnuts, so expect his "sober" to be switching to clear liquor and beer.
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2022
If she is mainly raised by the nanny that will likely be the case. My parents worked long hours when I was young so I had a Mexican nanny until I was 6 and Spanish was the first language I learned, I didn't learn English until I was like 4 or 5.
I love the part where he threatens to walk 2 miles after the show as if that's something special or we would be owned somehow... Normal people walk that amount every day if not more.
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2023
Every single person in his chat told him to get sober and I imagine a conversation was had when Nick briefly pulled him from the front page of Cozy.
I empathize with his recent "If I got sober I wouldn't be me anymore though". Was a cope I sneeded before getting clean and it's one I've seen nearly every addict use.
But alas, Ralph literally doesn't have the courage to get sober.
Ralph,
You will never be sober. You have no friends, you have no respect, you have no coping mechanisms. You are an inebriated man twisted by drugs and alcohol into a crude mockery of nature’s perfection.
All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are d̶i̶s̶g̶u̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶s̶h̶a̶m̶e̶d̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ dead, your “friends” laugh at your slatternly appearance behind closed doors.
Women are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed women to sniff out drunken pigmen with incredible efficiency. Even Xanax addicts who can “stand” look unseemly and unappealing to a woman. Your sentence structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunk hooker home with you, she’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your diseased, infected mouth.
You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake "Let's Fucking Go" every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your whorse will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with an "Inactive" tag marked with the name your daddy gave you, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know an addict is buried there. Your "fame" will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a thread that is unmistakably embarrassing.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.
All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are d̶i̶s̶g̶u̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶s̶h̶a̶m̶e̶d̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ dead, your “friends” laugh at your slatternly appearance behind closed doors.
Women are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed women to sniff out drunken pigmen with incredible efficiency. Even Xanax addicts who can “stand” look unseemly and unappealing to a woman. Your sentence structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunk hooker home with you, she’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your diseased, infected mouth.
You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake "Let's Fucking Go" every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your whorse will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with an "Inactive" tag marked with the name your daddy gave you, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know an addict is buried there. Your "fame" will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a thread that is unmistakably embarrassing.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
Well, to be honest, that 2020 pic looks like a repressed gay youth minister for a backwater Baptist church (unaccountably wearing a yarmulke*), so the faux spread collar with the cloudy "diamond" and "gold" ring is actually a sort of an improvement, gray grizzle and triple helping of alcoholic spider veins and acne notwithstanding.
*I think those are really sunglasses but wtf knows
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2016
Even if R&M spend more time "raising" her, I bet the babysitters talk to her more.
Though given Meigh is isolated from the rest of the world, Rozy's first words might be "Daddy's plastered again" or "whatever you say, fatass."
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2021
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2021
It's so funny that Ralph only cares about seeing his son when it means he can fleece his retard fan base for their shekels and/or have an attempt to own his "enemies" in court.