Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Preciate it youtube]

Jack’s rolling out, looking for America’s great wheelchair-accessible diners, drive-ins, and dives.

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Is he actually leaving the facility? He said in a comment the other day that he's basically staying until insurance won't cover any more. I'm honestly stoked for the home care saga to begin.

 

[biggacracka]

I thought it was a brace or a trainer of some kind at first glance, I wondered what possibly they think could be done for the twice-stricken arm at this point.

Maybe it's a compression thing to get the blood flowing better in it, not unlike diabetes socks

 

[Nothing To Say Here]

Jack’s rolling out, looking for America’s great wheelchair-accessible diners, drive-ins, and dives.

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Jack must be frisky…is it me or is he doing the Superman X-ray stare at her boobs?

 

[biggacracka]

Jack must be frisky…is it me or is he doing the Superman X-ray stare at her boobs?

Nah, I think he's doing the Superman x-ray stare at the restaurant across the street

 

[Kosher Salt]

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Come on, man. Your wife is your primary caretaker and is currently preparing to spend the rest of her life heaving you on/off the toilet. Why lecture as if her [frankly, Christlike] self abnegation is your own?

The closest thing Jack has done to any "serious effort" lately was the last time he strained to take a shit.

 

[stets]

Is that a recent pic? Because if so, how in the fuck do you get FATTER in the nursing home?? Isn't the point to lose weight and recover? Bonkers.

At least before he hobbled around his house, filmed his shitty cooking show, and went outside. That's at least a minimal amount of physical activity.

Now all he does is sit in bed eating. He's become the stereotypical morbidly obese archetype that does nothing but lay in bed, eat, and eventually die. If he had been following the diet in the hospital and nursing home, he would have lost weight. Instead he's doubled down with multiple meals a day and Tammy indulging in her feeder fetish.

He's going to spend the rest of his life in bed and getting fatter until one day his heart says "fuck it" and he dies.

 

[Sonic T]

So for one thing, of course he's dreaming about bacon. Dreaming about butter too, asshole? Second, why the fuck is he sharing his own posts just a minute later?

 

[Aunt Carol]

Jack’s rolling out, looking for America’s great wheelchair-accessible diners, drive-ins, and dives.

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Thank you; this puts things in perspective. (I am not the right kind of autist to draw lines and angles all over a photo of Jack in his kitchen.)

Looking at the geometry exhibited, I think Jack could hold a urinal over his urethral opening while in a wheelchair. The problem would be getting to it.

The confounding factor, besides his body habitus, is the sitting position. From my experience with naked aging fat men, he does not have enough free penis accessible to pull through the slit in a pair of briefs and then a trouser fly, much less over the top of sweat pants.

Healthy male urinators may argue, but please consider that you are imagining pulling your clothing down while standing. Jack is in a sitting position, with dubious leg strength/control. He is sitting on his pants and underwear and holding them in position.

After that, the problem is his single hand. If Jack could get a nub of dick exposed, it would rubberband back into his clothing when he let go to pick up the urinal.

As a veteran of elderly debilitated voluntarily-incontinent fat people, I predict Jack will discover external urinary catheters, although possibly not until he is at home and in Tammy's 24/7 care. Not a texas cath, for obvious reasons; probably the dick daisy Men's Liberty, for its design and for its mighty daytime TV advertising budget.

 

[Simon]

Thank you; this puts things in perspective. (I am not the right kind of autist to draw lines and angles all over a photo of Jack in his kitchen.)

Looking at the geometry exhibited, I think Jack could hold a urinal over his urethral opening while in a wheelchair. The problem would be getting to it.

The confounding factor, besides his body habitus, is the sitting position. From my experience with naked aging fat men, he does not have enough free penis accessible to pull through the slit in a pair of briefs and then a trouser fly, much less over the top of sweat pants.

Healthy male urinators may argue, but please consider that you are imagining pulling your clothing down while standing. Jack is in a sitting position, with dubious leg strength/control. He is sitting on his pants and underwear and holding them in position.

After that, the problem is his single hand. If Jack could get a nub of dick exposed, it would rubberband back into his clothing when he let go to pick up the urinal.

As a veteran of elderly debilitated voluntarily-incontinent fat people, I predict Jack will discover external urinary catheters, although possibly not until he is at home and in Tammy's 24/7 care. Not a texas cath, for obvious reasons; probably the dick daisy Men's Liberty, for its design and for its mighty daytime TV advertising budget.

All of this is horrifying to imagine.

 

[Aunt Carol]

All of this is horrifying to imagine.

More of an extrapolation than an imagining. Nearly everyone pees; it's gotta go somewhere somehow. What reveals our character are the choices we make about urination.

External catheter while not actually incontinent would be very on-brand for the Lazy Man. Maybe he'll claim they sent him some as an endorsement deal.

 

[Pig Cups]

Tryhard Duckfaggot is back, singing the praises of Honest Tries, a YouTuber with a similar schtick as Should I Series. HT is making a party cheese salad, and less than a minute in, August makes it clear that he (once again) made no effort to do prior research. He makes it sound as if HT is the first to do a party cheese salad video, ignoring the fact that there are quite a few others already on YouTube.

>He admits to fucking up and deleting the first attempt at filming the above video.
>Unlike most of his Jack uploads, this isn’t too abbreviated.

It doesn’t look like the HT Party Cheese video has ever made it to this thread.

I like this video. Party Cheese Salad videos are oddly comforting, but this one is especially so. Dude has astounding fortitude, considering that he could chew and swallow a bite of that garbage without heaving. But just looking at his face, you can tell that he was really struggling to hold it together.

 

[AnOminous]

If he's supposed to be losing weight, all that food is a terrible idea. The whole notion of a big breakfast or "breakfast is the most important meal of the day" comes from a time when most people worked physical jobs, often without a lunch break.

It says a lot about this stupid asshole that he's managed to Karen so hard that they're giving him two breakfasts even though they know it's why he's dying. They want him dead. Anyone who has to cope with this fat faggot would want him dead.

Jack’s rolling out, looking for America’s great wheelchair-accessible diners, drive-ins, and dives.

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What the FUCK? This tub of shit is getting even FATTER? What the fuck is WRONG with this ASSHOLE?

Tryhard Duckfaggot is back, singing the praises of Honest Tries, a YouTuber with a similar schtick as Should I Series. HT is making a party cheese salad, and less than a minute in, August makes it clear that he (once again) made no effort to do prior research.

I am starting to hate August as much as Jack himself. He is pretty much the Jack Scalfani of Jack Scalfani A-Logs.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

So for one thing, of course he's dreaming about bacon. Dreaming about butter too, asshole? Second, why the fuck is he sharing his own posts just a minute later?

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Look man, Jack has had to eat hospital food a whole bunch and so he's earned eating several packages of bacon. He just needs to be careful to not have sugar free sweetener on it so he doesn't have another stroke.

 

[AnOminous]

Look man, Jack has had to eat hospital food a whole bunch and so he's earned eating several packages of bacon. He just needs to be careful to not have sugar free sweetener on it so he doesn't have another stroke.

Jack is the actual hospital bitch who complains that the food in the hospital is terrible, plus the portions are small.

He keeps looking more and more like a potato someone forgot in their pantry. Hey he even has the weirdly shaped roots growing out of it!

From my experience with naked aging fat men

I wouldn't volunteer this information if I were you.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

If he's supposed to be losing weight, all that food is a terrible idea. The whole notion of a big breakfast or "breakfast is the most important meal of the day" comes from a time when most people worked physical jobs, often without a lunch break.

So a breakfast like that for a guy going to the factory for a 10 hour shift? Sure. But Jack literally lies in bed all day and watches cartoons.

When you're used to eating large quantities of food you wind up feeling that you need to continue to eat that much even if your reasons for it are gone.

Jagoff has gorged his entire life and is not going to change now.

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Come on, man. Your wife is your primary caretaker and is currently preparing to spend the rest of her life heaving you on/off the toilet. Why lecture as if her [frankly, Christlike] self abnegation is your own?

No. A relationship takes work. True love is there whether you like it or not. Mrs. Sebben might drive me up the wall sometimes and I know I drive her crazy as well on occasion. But that doesn't mean I don't love her.

What this sounds like is Jagoff needs to focus on his Sailor Moon poster and Optimus Prime toy to keep those homosexual demons at bay. Anybody who says true love requires work has never truly been in love.

Jack’s rolling out, looking for America’s great wheelchair-accessible diners, drive-ins, and dives.

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He's gotten fatter. At this point is there any reason to keep him alive? Just kill him already and let Hammy find herself another man.

So for one thing, of course he's dreaming about bacon. Dreaming about butter too, asshole? Second, why the fuck is he sharing his own posts just a minute later?

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Faggot has gotten bacon with half his meals. I think the last time I had bacon was... a month ago.

He doesn't need more bacon and when you're craving this it means you need to cut back.

As a veteran of elderly debilitated voluntarily-incontinent fat people, I predict Jack will discover external urinary catheters, although possibly not until he is at home and in Tammy's 24/7 care. Not a texas cath, for obvious reasons; probably the dick daisy Men's Liberty, for its design and for its mighty daytime TV advertising budget.

I checked that site and this stood out, "works great for men with a retracted or hidden penis".

You'd think that having this condition in the first place would be a wake up call. But no. We now have devices that help you deal with it. Not the symptoms. Not the reasons. But the aftermath. Instead of losing weight just strap one on. It's times like this that I hate modern life.

 

[TestTubePuppy]

He said in a comment the other day that he's basically staying until insurance won't cover any more.

That is a VERY unwise strategy. This is March. There's three quarters of a year left to go. If he uses up all his nursing care allowance at the beginning of the year, he's at risk of being high and dry if he has another stroke and comes out of it even worse off. His family might be left on their own to take care of a drooling, bedwetting near-vegetable for six to eight months.

 

[AnOminous]

That is a VERY unwise strategy. This is March. There's three quarters of a year left to go. If he uses up all his nursing care allowance at the beginning of the year, he's at risk of being high and dry if he has another stroke and comes out of it even worse off. His family might be left on their own to take care of a drooling, bedwetting near-vegetable for six to eight months.

Tammy needs to know there's a way out of this. It involves a pillow on Jack's face, and she can just kneel on it until Jack is gone.

 

[Pig Cups]

External catheter while not actually incontinent would be very on-brand for the Lazy Man. Maybe he'll claim they sent him some as an endorsement deal.

I think a catheter with a urinary bag strapped to his leg would be the most on-brand. A urinal requires maneuvering and positioning, which is actual work. And we know how much Jack hates having to put any amount of effort into anything. Therefore, being able to freely release when the urge strikes, with no worries or cares (provided the bag isn’t full), is his preferred option. He can just rely on MommyWife to change out his piss sacks anyway, so why should he care?

Holy shit- Jack with a bag would make him closer to Bennie Sears than a functional human lol

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

I think a catheter with a urinary bag strapped to his leg would be the most on-brand. A urinal requires maneuvering and positioning, which is actual work. And we know how much Jack hates having to put any amount of effort into anything. Therefore, being able to freely release when the urge strikes, with no worries or cares (provided the bag isn’t full), is his preferred option. He can just rely on MommyWife to change out his piss sacks anyway, so why should he care?

Holy shit- Jack with a bag would make him closer to Bennie Sears than a functional human lol
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Lol Jack doing the soy face

 

[AnOminous]

Lol Jack doing the soy face

I believe I have posted dozens of Jackoff's soy faces to the soy face thread.