DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: The Side Scrollers Podcast Week of March 13th

[Hungrymandinner]

The interview is interesting because it is one of the few glimpses we have of Phil interacting with the outside world. Similarly, I remember when prototype lolcow Steve Urkel made an appearance on Full House even though the plot of the episode was completely forgettable.

 

[myone]

I’m still puzzled as to why Phil did this interview

I think he was really hoping to become a regular guest on their podcast. He thinks he can shoot the shit with regular people. He forgot why his chat became Pyongyang in the fisrt place and why he surrounds himself with actual retards.

"Look I'm just a normal, chill, person, who has a lot of obsessed, mentally ill, 'tractors following them around."

In reality his appearance was 5 hours of uninterrupted lunacy and delusion.

 

[TyrasGuard]

This interview was amazing. Craig at one point tells DSP the exact reason why his detractors are so obsessed with seeing him get some accountability.

Imagine stumbling upon a dead dude and you see a man standing over him with blood on his shirt and a gun on his hand. The only defense this man has is "i didn't do it". Even if you point out to him that he is holding a gun, the guy was clearly shot, he has blood on his shirt, the bullet matches the gun, the gun has been recently fired, there was no one else in the room and he still insists that he didn't do it.

The amount of times he moves the goalpost is also frustrating. First it was "I didn't play WWE champions" then it was "I did play it but I'm not addicted" then it was "I have been addicted in the past but I've changed dood!".

The other thing that makes him frustrating is his victim complex, almost every answer as to why Phil doesn't do anything is to immediately blame his detractors or someone else, or to play the victim card, bring up the 15 year beggacy (Which he did, A LOT) or basically say "It's in the past and I've changed" even though he clearly hasn't.

The hypocrisy (and Adam called him out a lot for this) when complaining about his detractors making shit up about him while at the same time pointing the finger at Keem saying "I've heard awful things about you" was so disgusting that i think Adam got legit angry at him for it.

And finally, the deflection and the stories, how he spends so long telling stories that don't really matter in an attempt to deflect, he deflected so much with the 5K business expenses that I had to rewatch the stream just to see if at any point he answered despite being asked like 15 times about it.

I honestly think talking about the Fappening is the thing that hurt him the least out of all things they talked about. Keem just pretty much dunked on him, it must have been awful for Phil to hear that, while it was mean, it was also true.

Just a brilliant video, i doubt there will be a part two honestly. This was Phil's first taste of reality outside his bubble in years and if anything, i expect him to close himself from the outside world even more now.

 

[ManakaLala]

Phil could never do another one of these podcasts ever again and I would still feel satisfied. It's such a pleasure to finally have someone look this dude in the face when he's spewing his utter lunacy and just be like "HUH!? WUT?". Goes to show just how lost he is when someone offers even a minor amount of pushback to his web of half-truths.

 

[LostMy1stAccount]

The big question now is, will Phil do the second interview? The splash that this interview did, the full damage control he was forced to do, points to that he will probably just make up this bs excuse to not do it. Would love a second round of this but are Phil that dumb?

Another aspect would be the amount Sidescrollers paid him to be on their show.
I would expect that they paid him a flat sum for his appearance but I also know that some podcasters pay their guests in a percentage of superchats received during the show.
I can definetly see Phil being desperate for another appearance if the money is good.

 

[Pandalee’s Tits]

I’m still puzzled as to why Phil did this interview. What did he have to gain from it? By his own admission, he has no aspirations to progress beyond what he currently does (i.e., operate at level one). Perhaps Kat pressured him to do it so he could bring up her alleged restraining order so as to make her look better? I can’t imagine he did it to grow his audience; watching a 40-year-old ghoul play video games 8 hours each day in his Fallout vault can’t appeal to too many people.

I think it’s because he’s actually slow and thought this could bring him some sort of redemption or new audience members.

 

[Sloppy Party Bottom]

Phil is fucking delusional. Keem offered him $50k up front to do this podcast, and he said no. Fuck man, that would have been epic.

 

[Bullet Continuum Shift]

Not so sure, today was the most exciting day on Phil's life since he placed 4th at Evo.

He'll be back to begging tomorrow but he might start missing the experience of actually feeling anything other than the existencial dread of spending 8 hours a day pretending to like video games he absolutely hates.

Something interesting was brought up on the decompression stream - basically Stuttering Craig saying "Everything went as planned, thank you all for coming." - there was concern that DSP got an ego boost from the entire thing and he's not going to realize it until he's already at rock bottom.

This podcast was a fucking treat during an era of Phil being so unbearably boring, it literally brought me back out of Farms retirement status.

Glad to be back and I missed you fuckers.

Welcome back!

 

[I'd abeeb bear]

The amount of crying early in this thread goes to show you why no one gives a single fuck what the biggest a-logs have to say about WWE mobile games and a fat man that misappropriated their paypigging. The people you did nothing but shit on, even once the interview began, are the ones that bring you actual content that you reluctantly had to admit through your baby tears wasn't the worst thing in the world, and many of the original criers just stopped bothering to reply.

That's just as funny as the interview.

 

[Crab Couch Choochoo]

Pfew long thread, and in such a short time.
But yes this was FIRE.
This was a piggy roasting!
He might be the pidgeon claiming a win but he didn't even succeed to throw the pieces of the board and poop on it. Instead he pooped on himself.
Sure he made $250 from his dents but...eh... yeah. That was just short term. Long term he is still floating around that drain and he keeps getting closer.
I wonder what kind of long term damage will come out of this. His dents are super dense, so losing them is about impossible...

 

[FamicomGorby]

The amount of crying early in this thread goes to show you why no one gives a single fuck what the biggest a-logs have to say about WWE mobile games and a fat man that misappropriated their paypigging. The people you did nothing but shit on, even once the interview began, are the ones that bring you actual content that you reluctantly had to admit through your baby tears wasn't the worst thing in the world, and many of the original criers just stopped bothering to reply.

That's just as funny as the interview.

As someone who doubted the interview, I say it's better to have extremely low expectations than to be like "The walls are closing in! This is it for DSP!" everytime. Then if something happens you're pleased, if it doesn't then you expected it.

 

[BallBuster II]

So I will admit that Craig and Adam kicked ass. They went hard without going overboard enough to scare him away so give me my crow, I'll eat it all.

We got some good, in DSP-speak "half truths". He wasn't able to concoct new lies or spin certain things so he was forced to tell the truth in some situations. This stuff is going to be dissected by detractors hard.

At the end of the day though, he came off even more slimy, but and I think he knew this, his hardcore whales were never going to be turned off, and they were only ever going to see this interview as a W for Phil. Case and point, him making $250 in a 90 minute lovefest glorified prestream after the interview. He admitted to lying to his audience about numerous things but these people don't care. Instead of throwing their money at some hotub thot they think they are better than other simps because they are supporting a scumbag pig.

What was obvious too was that he is unable to speak like a normal person. His cult leader persona isn't a persona, it is who he is and it is in his daily mannerisms no matter what he does.

Dude is clinging to the "showing my WWE Champs account will hurt my family" like a fucking mong. We know all his accounts in damn near everything he does, and chances are his Apple account is his standard email he uses for everything, so him showing his game handle for a fucking mobile game means nothing, but he knows... HE KNOWS the damage it would cause. I surmised the original 40k number years ago, which upon doing more research was probably closer to 50k at that time, and we are probably closing in on 120k if not surpassed it at this point. Should clarification come from the pig's mouth, I'll bet he loses 1-2 whales, but he would still mostly remain intact.

It is clear that in the eyes of the wheelchairs, he can do no wrong, so why not say fuck it and go full mask off at this point instead spinning multiple lies you can't keep track of.

 

[Telemeter]

Yes, he did and no, he didn't do damage control. He thinks it went well! DSP got anally raped 5 hours straight, he thinks it was a fun time, and hopes to be one of the regular guys of the podcast in the future. Meanwhile the podcast guys told him he needs to get a job and seek therapy.

If there are new people watching his stream he can beg to, then yes, it went well.

As a beggar, DSP doesn't have any dignity or drive to do anything else other than begging til the day he dies, he doesn't really care much about anything other than increasing his begging potential.

 

[Passacaille]

Well, I for one think Phil did a great job in this interview. He presented himself well, and managed to lay to rest all those nasty rumours about him in a calm and measured manner.

The hosts were hard, but fair, but in the end Phil won everyone over with his charm, intellect and adherence to the truth.

Phil, you have debunked your detractors, redeemed yourself, and made a fan of all of us who were watching, including Kiwifarms.

Good job, Phil, and Godspeed!

THE END​

 

[myone]

As someone who doubted the interview, I say it's better to have extremely low expectations than to be like "The walls are closing in! This is it for DSP!" everytime. Then if something happens you're pleased, if it doesn't then you expected it.

The interview was like buying a lottery ticket. You don't expect to win the jackpot, it's probably going to be a nothingburger, but you'll sure as hell check the numbers and be a little excited about the results.

 

[Sapphixys Shitty Panties]

Honestly, I really get the vibes that this is happening to hype up the podcast that was talked about for a while. I think this is hype to announce a Boogie/Wings podcast.

FUCKING CALLED IT!!!

 

[Corpun]

 

[Balr0g]

FUCKING CALLED IT!!!

Imagine if Keem says "Fuck it let's just do it with Boogie and Wings" and then they rake in the money DSP will be like "but they never asked me! This is unfair!!!!"

 

[I'd abeeb bear]

As someone who doubted the interview, I say it's better to have extremely low expectations than to be like "The walls are closing in! This is it for DSP!" everytime. Then if something happens you're pleased, if it doesn't then you expected it.

That's not the same as immediately running to dig up dirt on the interviewers simply to have the canons ready to go. Expect the worst, sure , but read the start of the thread and it's exactly what every person knows DSP a-logs to be. Scorned ex-paypiggies that echo chamber each other into oblivion about how evil and vile DSP is for wasting their money. I'm sure you've rallied up one thousand defenses around this, but this thread was nothing but tears for days on end. Pretty amazing, but it's exactly what should be expected, which is why it's funny.

 

[The Ancestor]

Sorry if it’s been addressed, I’m been out of the DSP loop for a year- what was that restraining order business mentioned by one of the detractor questions?