Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[AnOminous]

It’s one of those things where you can do it, but boiling in a pot on the stove doesn’t really take any longer and it’s easier with less to clean up.

I've found "boiling" in an air fryer to be the best because water gets inconsistent results, whereas in an air fryer it turns out exactly the same every time. And there's even less to clean up, literally nothing in fact.

I think that the streaming thing paid better than the lawyer thing so he gravitated heavily toward the latter.

It's pretty amazing how he does something so successfully that he can break free of whatever he felt was controlling him, then once he has that success, decides to transform into Balldo Man and burn it all to the ground.

 

[Twitter Is Cancer]

He doesn't work. His wife doesn't work. They have a nanny.

These people don't have a tough life.

I'd put the mess down to a husband who is alcoholic and a pill-head wife.

bug-eyes and rekieta are giant humanoid rats.

 

[Captain Manning]

It's pretty amazing how he does something so successfully that he can break free of whatever he felt was controlling him, then once he has that success, decides to transform into Balldo Man and burn it all to the ground.

He's not the first, and he won't be the last. Many such cases documented on this site.

The only debatable point is the "why," in his case. Mid-life crisis seems to the most popular opinion, but I dunno.

 

[Twitter Is Cancer]

I think that the streaming thing paid better than the lawyer thing so he gravitated heavily toward the latter. Other people have also pointed out that "old Nick" was probably a better streamer than he was a lawyer anyways. It makes a certain amount of sense that there would be a priority shift, but he also might have way overdid it.

It's difficult to say how much lawyering Nick did back in the day, because while we can find something of a case history through court records, lawyers frequently do other things that wouldn't show up in said records. Like consultations, contract work, etc. In fact, that's usually the bread and butter of most lawfirms. Not trial work.

I don't think Rekieta was ever remotely a normal lawyer nor did he ever work hard or have daily cases to deal with. He LARPed in an office and hated it because whoever his paymaster was expected it of him. His seething hatred at having to be normal and follow normal rules comes from this time when the trust controller was making Rekieta behave like a sane adult as much as possible.

 

[Strix454]

The only debatable point is the "why," in his case. Mid-life crisis seems to the most popular opinion, but I dunno.

A significant increase in income (Like Nick got in 2022) can also alone make people go off the rails.

But in Nick's case its as likely a case of arrested development where he suddenly has the freedom of an adult in his 40s that most people obtain after college in their 20s. Also, from the way he talks sometimes, I get the impression that he saw late 1990s/early 2000s teen movies as a guide to life. That he wants to live that sex 'n drugs lifestyle those movies promised him.

 

[Miller]

He also has been more blatant with the obviously stupid reasons to cancel streams or appearances he's not interested in. Nick was "dehydrated" for Null and with Joe he was busy because he had to prepare for his weekend trip that's five days away. That's not counting the appearance he was late for and said he overslept.

Didn't he also "forgot" to appear on Critical Drinker's stream a week ago?

“I’m so lazy these days guys I buy pre-boiled eggs.” Blah blah blah rambling about the virtues of rubbery, shitty, water laden, prepackaged boiled eggs.

Wait, those things exist? Boiling eggs is the easiest and quickest thing.

 

[Not Who You Think]

I've found "boiling" in an air fryer to be the best because water gets inconsistent results, whereas in an air fryer it turns out exactly the same every time. And there's even less to clean up, literally nothing in fact.

PSA: don't use the microwave. Most of you might already be aware of this, but you never know (time-stamped for your convenience).

 

[HodgePodgeRogerDodger]

Do we know if Rekieta is bogarting Xanax from his wife, yet? He’s quickly stealing the Ralphamale’s shtick with how lazy he is.

I really don’t think Nick was that overworked, but improperly managed his time and lied to himself about how much work he’s doing. I think the Depp/ Rittenhouse Streams and the Superchats was an issue of not condensing streams down when he could. It lead to a lot of useless bullshit and “Balls or no balls?” being asked to every unfortunate motherfucker to enter the stream.

 

[Captain Manning]

I don't think Rekieta was ever remotely a normal lawyer nor did he ever work hard or have daily cases to deal with. He LARPed in an office and hated it because whoever his paymaster was expected it of him. His seething hatred at having to be normal and follow normal rules comes from this time when the trust controller was making Rekieta behave like a sane adult as much as possible.

We know from records he was representing people in cases. Mostly low-end criminal shit. His case load was never particularly "large," but it was there. By Nick's own admission, he was mostly there to plead his clients out, or try for a dismissal. Which is to say, he doesn't really seem to do full blown trials.

We can also speculate he was also doing paperwork, consults, and admin shit during the daytime. That's pretty typical for most practices. Between the two of these things, you could argue he did have a "day job."

It would have been one thing if he winded down his law practice, and continued to grow a very successful show, but he seems to have winded down his law practice and is now doing this boomer coomer shit that isn't anywhere near as successful. Put another way, I can't really fault him for not really doing much IRL lawyering anymore. Naturally, you go for the thing that is more enjoyable and pays better. But the way he seems to be throwing that away now is just baffling.

 

[waffle]

The real question about Nick and the law is after the lolsuit lands however its going to, will he even be able to go back to the law without moving first? Could he even now? Like I understand he legally can, but I feel like he is rapidly taking any reputation he's ever had.

 

[Captain Manning]

The real question about Nick and the law is after the lolsuit lands however its going to, will he even be able to go back to the law without moving first? Could he even now? Like I understand he legally can, but I feel like he is rapidly taking any reputation he's ever had.

I am not even sure Nick wants to law anymore, but there are way bigger nutters that are lawyers, have remained lawyers, and even still practice.

Offhand, I can think of Andrew Schlafly, L. Linn Wood, and Sidney Powell.

Usually, in order to be completely ruined as a lawyer, you need to do a massive fuckup, related to the practice of law, that attracts the attention of the court's discipline apparatus. It's why Nick survived all those OLPR complaints that were filed during Weebwars. The KickVic snowflakes thought they could cancel him as if he held any other job, but the entities that investigate lawyer misconduct are looking at a very narrow range of conduct.

Also, somewhat related, Fox News just agreed to settle with Dominion Voting Systems by paying Domotion $787.5 million. That's a HUGE settlement in a defamation case that I think "old Nick" would have loved to talk about on his show.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

I had the impression, back in the old days, that he worked during the day and streamed a couple of nights during the week. If he had kept that schedule I feel like burn out wouldn't have happened. It's really not a good idea to turn a fun hobby or side hustle you find fun into your full time job.

All things in moderation... I really believe that this was too much of a good thing for Nick. It was law-adjacent that it made it fun and looked like work.

Do we know if Rekieta is bogarting Xanax from his wife, yet? He’s quickly stealing the Ralphamale’s shtick with how lazy he is.

I really don’t think Nick was that overworked, but improperly managed his time and lied to himself about how much work he’s doing. I think the Depp/ Rittenhouse Streams and the Superchats was an issue of not condensing streams down when he could. It lead to a lot of useless bullshit and “Balls or no balls?” being asked to every unfortunate motherfucker to enter the stream.

I believe he brought people on just to break up the monotony. Or join in his suffering.

 

[waffle]

I am not evern sure Nick wants to law anymore, but there are way bigger nutters that are lawyers, have remained lawyers, and even still practice.

Offhand, I can think of Andrew Schlafly, L. Linn Wood, and Sidney Powell.

Usually, in order to be completely ruined as a lawyer, you need to do a massive fuckup, related to the practice of law, that attracts the attention of the court's discipline apparatus. It's why Nick survived all those OLPR complaints that were filed during Weebwars. The KickVic snowflakes thought they could cancel him as if he held any other job, but the entities that investigate lawyer misconduct are looking at a very narrow range of conduct.

Also, somewhat related, Fox News just agreed to settle with Dominion Voting Systems by paying Domotion $787.5 million. That's a HUGE settlement in a defamation case that I think "old Nick" would have loved to talk about on his show.

I'm not saying he's going to get disbarred, but those guys don't live in small town MN either. It takes a strong referral network and a positive reputation (or at least one as a shark) to survive as a small town solo practitioner. If everyone in his little ass town thinks of him as the drunk burnout who defames people on the internet while hollering about sex toys I don't think he's going to be able to pull that off. Moving to the twin cities or something wouldn't un-dis-bar him anyway, but it might give him a big enough pond to start over with a fresh(ish) reputation.

I don't think he WANTS to go back to the law either, but he seems to be burning down his internet career so quick I don't see what other options he'll have left in a year or two. I can't imagine the rumble/locals people are going to renew after his weird coomer meltdown.

 

[HodgePodgeRogerDodger]

All things in moderation... I really believe that this was too much of a good thing for Nick. It was law-adjacent that it made it fun and looked like work.



I believe he brought people on just to break up the monotony. Or join in his suffering.

I think he did it poorly and his brute force method was stupid. Get a co-host who’s mildly entertaining to take over when court goes on an hour recess and nothing really happened.
Give Joe and the other Jew a 1/4 of your purse while you take a nap/ cook your kids lunch.

Nick handled shit like a retard and his wife seems like a pillhead.

 

[feral cat #6385]

The man has a wife. A wife who has help taking care of the kids. What the fuck is she doing while he's engaging in his stupidity? Drex can't be boning her 24/7, surely?

Kayla, here's a tip for you: if you're worried about sick kids, instead of spunking money sending them on weekly visits to a chiropractor, CLEAN YOUR FUCKING KITCHEN!

You forgot about the masseur. He gives her his veiny thick prison cock when Drexel is away. And Nick watches. Limp dick in one hand, booze in the other and the balldo jammed up his ass dreaming about taking that meaty mancock in his holes.

The junkie looking bitch has probably fucked every nigger in Spicer. She was his first. He was her 98th.

Instead of using ice cubes and waiting, just dump out the boiling water, run them under cold water until cooled, and then dump out most of the water leaving about half an inch. Cover with the lid, and panhandle shake it until they stop making a cracking noise. They will basically peel themselves.

I bring a mixture of water and vinegar to a boil. Then slowly place the eggs in the pot. Let them boil for exactly 8 minutes, drain, rinse with cold water. Nice creamy yolks every time.

The vinegar partially dissolves the shells and makes it easy to get them off without fucking up the egg. Eggs can also be done in an insta pot using the pressure cooking function but I find that to be overkill.

I don't think he WANTS to go back to the law either, but he seems to be burning down his internet career so quick I don't see what other options he'll have left in a year or two. I can't imagine the rumble/locals people are going to renew after his weird coomer meltdown.

His next career is glory hole attendant at Gay 90's.

 

[Joggin Noggin]

“I’m so lazy these days guys I buy pre-boiled eggs.”

Boiling eggs takes 1 minute of active work and only like 10 minutes start to finish. What a lazy faggot he's being. Mr. cooks-a-lot would rather eat rubbery balls that probably barely taste like eggs anymore than do the mildest of effort lol

 

[Dean Pentel]

If you're upset I and others mock him for that, I'd recommend taking it up with moonface himself. Or don't. I don't really care.

You wrote a funny thing about that socially stunted retard. I liked it.

 

[Balldo's Gate]

Here's a tale from the Locals crypt for you guys.

Remember when Kayla went for a photo shoot and posted to Locals a picture from it on her birthday this year?

Spoiler: Birthday photo

It turns out Kayla had been talking about going for a photo shoot for some time.

Part I: the "erection night" stream Locals chat

In November 2022 (just over a week after Halloween) was Rekieta's infamous election night stream the night of November 8th, 2022. @Not Who You Think has an excellent summary of the stream itself, which the duck branded the "erection stream" - but I'm more interested in the messages in the Locals page for that stream. I don't know if these messages were sent before, during, or after the stream, but there was at least one Locals chat posted earlier on November 8th and a Locals chat posted on November 9th, so the span of time that these messages below could have occurred in is quite narrow.

The initial context to this exchange is that @EgalitarianBtch asked Nick Rekieta "the inseam length on your pants". Nick replied "34" jeans and 35 or 36" dress pants, depending on cut". @EgalitarianBtch replied to Nick that they have the same leg length! Wow!

Joining the conversation, Kayla posted on her "@RealLadyRackets" account that she was hoping that @EgalitarianBtch was going to "send him some sexy pants":



Replying to @EgalitarianBtch, Kayla says their oldest son was the Riddler for Halloween, and she was "totally stealing his suit jacket for a sexy photo shoot":



This statement was so out of left field that even a local of the Locals revolted.

Don't worry guys! Her son's Halloween costume was a SMALL MAN'S SUIT, "so it's okay"!



When @Carimachet replies to Kayla's initial message encouraging her to get photos professionally taken, Kayla responds that she wants to do a "boudoir photo shoot".



Part II: the Spain vs Germany World Cup game

The Riddler costume was brought up again several weeks later on a Locals page posted in late November.

The precipitating context in which it was brought up was that the Locals chat was watching the Spain vs Germany World Cup game. Niclas Fullkrug came off the bench and negated Alvaro Morata's opener to tie the game for Germany, which ultimately finished 1-1. In the midst of this, Nick Rekieta started talking about how handsome he found Manuel Neuer.



Kayla gets involved in the conversation and starts joking with Nick in the chat, saying he "loves looking at men, we all know this". There's a few messages so I'll spoiler them as they aren't super relevant except for context:

Spoiler: Joking

At this point @Carimachet jumps in and helpfully suggests to Kayla that she "dress up like a man" for Nick.



Kayla once again brings up her son's Riddler costume, saying "I'm totally stealing just the suit coat for a photo shoot".



@Carimachet responds. It is hard to decipher most of what she posts, but her reply to Kayla says in part "sex not photoshoot". I think @Carimachet is trying to say she was suggesting Kayla crossdress in a, uh, different context. I don't know what the second part of the message means. Maybe it's supposed to be a quote of something Nick said? I really have no idea.

In any event, Kayla's reply is "I think he might like to do both."



@Carimachet then replies with incomprehensible gibberish.



As far as I can tell that message got no response from anybody, which seems fair enough.

 

[feral cat #6385]

@Carimachet responds. It is hard to decipher most of what she posts, but her reply to Kayla says in part "sex not photoshoot". I think @Carimachet is trying to say she was suggesting Kayla crossdress in a, uh, different context. I don't know what the second part of the message means. Maybe it's supposed to be a quote of something Nick said? I really have no idea.

I'm going to take it to mean that Nick's asshole has been penetrated by more dildos than Jack Murphy.

I would assume the lamination thing is some sort of dudes getting so turned on by the photos they would be cumming all over them joke. I wonder how Rackets would react to people posting cum tributes to Lady Rackets in his locals. He should love it because he is an omega cuck.

 

[Swole McPole]

The junkie looking bitch has probably fucked every nigger in Spicer. She was his first. He was her 98th.

No niggers in Spicer. The city is 0.1% African American. The Rekieta family has to ship in their dark skinned bulls from elsewhere.

Nick's nobody's fool. He knows that a nigger might be fine in the bedroom, but you wouldn't want one living next door to you.