- Joined
- Apr 8, 2018
I have been trying for the past few days to make it through Bob's video on Mario all the way through and boy howdy is it insufferably grating. One of his early points is that people who were not happy with the movie "sight unseen" changed their opinions on the movie when they finally saw it because it, in fact, did not make Peach into some uber stronk woman and that was somehow a betrayal of their position. While a number of the people he hand picked to show off are probably riding the grift train it doesn't change that they were proven wrong because Peach wasn't Captain Marvel levels of girl boss bitch which is what they were complaining about. On that note of hating the movie "sight unseen" I remember Bob being none too pleased when the announcement of the movie was made and that it was gonna be made by the same people that did Minions. He kinda memory holed that and speaking of memory holes!
At 13:00 he does an epic dunk on some cultural warrior that I've never heard of by stopping the video for TWO GODDAMNED MINUTES to cope away the fact that Marvel movies, SAVE FOR FUCKING ONE IN 2021 THAT MADE ALMOST TWO BILLION DOLLARS THAT HE NEVER EVEN ACKNOWLEDGES, have gotten pretty hefty diminishing returns since End Game on the coof with incredible sanctimoniousness and righteous indignation, "Uhh can you think of anything that happened in the past few years that would've explained this?". For over a minute he repeats versions of that. He then gets mad and says "seriously, fuck that guy" because he's "pretending to ignore death and destruction and sickness and pain of millions of people". Lol ok Bob, calm down. For those playing at home, here's all the movies in phase 4, all of which came out during the greatest hoax man has ever known.

Some of these things are not like the other. Before someone can cry out "But we had the poke by the time Spiderman came out reeeeeeeeeee!", bullshit. The vax was available at the start of 2021. The Fauci ouchi and boosters have been pushed religiously since then. Spiderman also came out a little less than a month and a half after Eternals, in December, in the winter, in what we were told was the most dangerous time for the coof. Fuck you. You cannot explain a five times jump in reported profit from the two movies using the coof. Disney put out shit that no one had heard of before, made God awful trailers for them(I despise the fucking nostalgia piano renditions and epic remixes of pop songs), and shat them out with very little thought. Now compare that to the Spiderman movie that was nothing more than a dumb, bog-standard MCU affair that they made into pure, finely aged in oak casks, 'member berry wine. Millions of people went to see 20 years of Spiderman on one screen in droves, while still being told that kung-flu was ravaging the land, so they could sip on that sweet, sweet 'member berry wine over watching a bunch of gods quibble with each other, mystic kung-fu shit with a thing with two butts, or watching a movie about a character who was wiped out of existence and can never come back.
But no, it was allFauci and his gain of function research I mean covid's and probably conservatives', fault. This will be his new coping strategy going on.
However, none of this holds a candle to how he ends the segment. He says, and I quote:

When Bob spends all day on twitter openly declaiming that people who disagree with him politically are not human and their lives don't matter and the world can only move forward they are all removed, well son that's jut the "funny version of angry".
EDIT:
I take that last bit back. The funniest thing he says is at the end when he's trying to convince Cocaine Bear is actually a woke movie, woke a word he doesn't even believe exists. He tries to sell the idea that the fake outrage people, yeah Bob called other people fake outrage, that they should've done videos calling the move "Wokaine Bear" because of things like the titular cocaine bear being a sow. He then chides them for what feels like forever because they just couldn't be bothered to make videos on such an easy target. He exclaims that he bought a fake beard to do a skit making fun of them in what I can only assume would be GameOver Thinker style...only to say that he couldn't be bothered to make a script for the joke skit because of muh mentals or some bull. The same dumbass who proclaimed loudly at the beginning of this same video that he could've made all kinds of videos on the Mario movie and made money off of it before it's release but DIDN'T because of "self-care" is berating people for not doing his dumbass idea of fake outrage of Wokaine Bear that he could not even be bothered to make a parody out of AFTER allegedly buying props for it. I'd expect nothing else from the guy who came up with Care Bears meets Paradise Lost LMFAO.
At 13:00 he does an epic dunk on some cultural warrior that I've never heard of by stopping the video for TWO GODDAMNED MINUTES to cope away the fact that Marvel movies, SAVE FOR FUCKING ONE IN 2021 THAT MADE ALMOST TWO BILLION DOLLARS THAT HE NEVER EVEN ACKNOWLEDGES, have gotten pretty hefty diminishing returns since End Game on the coof with incredible sanctimoniousness and righteous indignation, "Uhh can you think of anything that happened in the past few years that would've explained this?". For over a minute he repeats versions of that. He then gets mad and says "seriously, fuck that guy" because he's "pretending to ignore death and destruction and sickness and pain of millions of people". Lol ok Bob, calm down. For those playing at home, here's all the movies in phase 4, all of which came out during the greatest hoax man has ever known.

Movie | Budget | Box office |
Black Widow | $200 million | $379.8 million |
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (the movie with the thing with two butts Bob swore was gonna be big) | $150–200 million | $432.2 million |
Eternals | $200 million | $402.1 million |
Spider-Man: No Way Home | $200 million | $1.922 billion |
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness | $172–200 million | $955.8 million |
Thor: Love and Thunder | $250 million | $760.9 million |
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever | $200–250 million | $859.1 million |
Some of these things are not like the other. Before someone can cry out "But we had the poke by the time Spiderman came out reeeeeeeeeee!", bullshit. The vax was available at the start of 2021. The Fauci ouchi and boosters have been pushed religiously since then. Spiderman also came out a little less than a month and a half after Eternals, in December, in the winter, in what we were told was the most dangerous time for the coof. Fuck you. You cannot explain a five times jump in reported profit from the two movies using the coof. Disney put out shit that no one had heard of before, made God awful trailers for them(I despise the fucking nostalgia piano renditions and epic remixes of pop songs), and shat them out with very little thought. Now compare that to the Spiderman movie that was nothing more than a dumb, bog-standard MCU affair that they made into pure, finely aged in oak casks, 'member berry wine. Millions of people went to see 20 years of Spiderman on one screen in droves, while still being told that kung-flu was ravaging the land, so they could sip on that sweet, sweet 'member berry wine over watching a bunch of gods quibble with each other, mystic kung-fu shit with a thing with two butts, or watching a movie about a character who was wiped out of existence and can never come back.
But no, it was all
However, none of this holds a candle to how he ends the segment. He says, and I quote:
Sorry but *looks down at the ground for a few seconds* it's-it's hard to stay only the funny version of angry all the time sometimes

When Bob spends all day on twitter openly declaiming that people who disagree with him politically are not human and their lives don't matter and the world can only move forward they are all removed, well son that's jut the "funny version of angry".
EDIT:
I take that last bit back. The funniest thing he says is at the end when he's trying to convince Cocaine Bear is actually a woke movie, woke a word he doesn't even believe exists. He tries to sell the idea that the fake outrage people, yeah Bob called other people fake outrage, that they should've done videos calling the move "Wokaine Bear" because of things like the titular cocaine bear being a sow. He then chides them for what feels like forever because they just couldn't be bothered to make videos on such an easy target. He exclaims that he bought a fake beard to do a skit making fun of them in what I can only assume would be GameOver Thinker style...only to say that he couldn't be bothered to make a script for the joke skit because of muh mentals or some bull. The same dumbass who proclaimed loudly at the beginning of this same video that he could've made all kinds of videos on the Mario movie and made money off of it before it's release but DIDN'T because of "self-care" is berating people for not doing his dumbass idea of fake outrage of Wokaine Bear that he could not even be bothered to make a parody out of AFTER allegedly buying props for it. I'd expect nothing else from the guy who came up with Care Bears meets Paradise Lost LMFAO.
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