How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[Neighborhood Curmudgeon]

Now that my awful work week has ended and I get to relax for four days straight, I'm feeling good again!

I can't say enough how much I appreciate ranting and shitposting with you guys here on KiwiFarms. Besides my family and very few IRL friends, I don't have a social life. In fact, I haven't had a social life in a very long time. I don't miss it though because I feel like I can truly be myself. There's no more acting just to be accepted by other people. I genuinely like my quasi-hermit lifestyle. I understand that many people will think I'm a weirdo, but I also don't care anymore.

This week, I took a long hard look at my normie liberal coworkers and realized how I'm grateful to NOT be like them. Unsurprisingly, most of them are also friends outside of work. I get that some people can do that, but I also think it can be a bad idea. I'm just glad I see them strictly as my coworkers and that's it.

 

[Harbinger of Kali Yuga]

Now that my awful work week has ended and I get to relax for four days straight, I'm feeling good again!

I can't say enough how much I appreciate ranting and shitposting with you guys here on KiwiFarms. Besides my family and very few IRL friends, I don't have a social life. In fact, I haven't had a social life in a very long time. I don't miss it though because I feel like I can truly be myself. There's no more acting just to be accepted by other people. I genuinely like my quasi-hermit lifestyle. I understand that many people will think I'm a weirdo, but I also don't care anymore.

This week, I took a long hard look at my normie liberal coworkers and realized how I'm grateful to NOT be like them. Unsurprisingly, most of them are also friends outside of work. I get that some people can do that, but I also think it can be a bad idea. I'm just glad I see them strictly as my coworkers and that's it.

How can you have a social life? Despite what people say, most people you meet in real life really are like people on reddit, and that's not a good thing. The entire Millennial and Gen Z generations have been subsumed by progressivism and if you're not one of them you pretty much get barred from being online and if you voice even a moderate opinion you could lose your job. Everyone's into the same fucking bullshit, fucking Marvel shit everywhere and people will think you're weird if you don't like their fucking stupid rap music. The way people look at you when you say you don't like superhero movies... god I fucking hate people. When I don't need to be sociable, I will say things that make people think I am a prick, which I am. I'll say, "oh, I'm too old for superhero movies" or backhanded shit like that that grants me just enough plausible deniability to be able to keep it going and grate on them. I'm actually a lot nicer on the farms than in real life because despite whatever disagreements I get into at least I'm not being forcefed tranny propaganda and being bullied into supporting socialist policies.

Hell, I've bumped into users on here whose pfp and text referenced my favorite obscure musical artist... I've never even met a fan of the same band in real life... hell, people here post on my wall to talk about Nina fucking Hagen, a website notorious for Nazi edgelords and trolls and I meet more people here that know who Nina Hagen is than the pretentious art people I've known in real life.

You don't arrive to the Farms if you're the kind of person that just lets life hand things to you and you eat what's served. That's why the Farms are different. Most people are just trying to maintain a social standing.

I'm sure this will resonate with a lot of people here--I try not to talk to people much anymore because I hate self-censoring, and this society demands you self-censor unless you're not part of the left.

 

[A Grey Cat]

It's a lolcow characteristic just to resent that kind of guy into adulthood. That high school quarterback was just a dude like anyone else, maybe got laid a little bit earlier than anyone else, but it isn't like he just got everything for free. He probably put a lot of effort into ending up like that.

And if you check back on that high school quarterback dude, he might have turned into an utter failure, he might have turned into an insurance salesman, he might own a restaurant now, or he might have ended up a politician in the state legislature.

The prom queen ends up fat, the quarterback who married her ends up selling you insurance policies, quit resenting these people, they were just like you. Not directed at you Fed.

That's why I barley remember anything from my own past. It just kinda blends together bits and pieces that can barley fit together to make any sense. Keep your eyes on the road ahead and off the roadkill in the rear view mirror.

Every day I become more accepting of my inevitable death.

Good for you if ny dreams of seeing mine are anything to go by I'm going to live in hatred and fear of my own mortality till it catches up to me.

People like E musk are to busy mucking up social media to focus on his promise of making everyone "immortal thru technology." And the medical science community is too busy mutilating gender confused children or Frankensteining uterine tissue into men's pelvises to research a real way to stave off man's inevitable demise.

 

[Neighborhood Curmudgeon]

@Harbinger of Kali Yuga

I hear you, man! It's good to know I'm not the only one who's fed up with society. On one hand, I can also accept that there is a lot wrong with me. On the other hand, I can also see that I'm better off disengaging with society because it's not worth it. Even if I tried to be a model friend or socialite, it wouldn't change how fucked up and stupid society is. It seems like it would be all for nothing. I don't feel like I've failed or that I'm missing out on anything.

That's why I barley remember anything from my own past. It just kinda blends together bits and pieces that can barley fit together to make any sense. Keep your eyes on the road ahead and off the roadkill in the rear view mirror.

Amen! I won't deny that there are certain people and events from my past that I resent, but as time goes on I feel less resentment because I've learned to move on. All I can do is learn from the past and make sure my present and future are better than it. There's no point in dwelling on the past.

I think that's one of the beautiful things about being an adult and getting older. You don't have to be defined by your past and you can move on from it. Also, as an adult you have more freedom than you did in your youth. You don't have to be that same person in the past anymore. You can be who you want. Granted, it's not perfect but it's better than being stuck in school and having your peers, teachers, and others telling you who to be.

Sorry for the soapboxing, but your comment struck me right in the feels!

 

[Betonhaus]

I wish I lived in the small town I grew up in. I'm never going to be someone that fits in at this city.

 

[Star Platinum]

I mostly just sit around and hate other people and pour myself into my hobbies and the little world I'm creating for myself because this really is a dead world.

Find the things internal to you that give you the most joy that do not need people and pour your heart out into them.

These are the roots of my problem, though. I don't have any hobbies because I don't really care about anything. Nothing intrinsically motivates me. I don't have any goals or things I want to achieve. I'm alive, and that's about it. And people don't believe me when I say I was like this even as a kid, but I was. It's not like life beat me down until I thought my dreams were unreachable; I just never had any.

I'm not unhappy because of hatred of the world or "society," or whatever. I think overall people do what they can to get by. Unlike when I was still plagued by adolescent hormones, I don't wave my fist at the world and the normies. People lie, cheat, steal, etc., but I know that has nothing to do with my happiness (or lack thereof).

 

[Neighborhood Curmudgeon]

These are the roots of my problem, though. I don't have any hobbies because I don't really care about anything. Nothing intrinsically motivates me. I don't have any goals or things I want to achieve. I'm alive, and that's about it. And people don't believe me when I say I was like this even as a kid, but I was. It's not like life beat me down until I thought my dreams were unreachable; I just never had any.

I'm not unhappy because of hatred of the world or "society," or whatever. I think overall people do what they can to get by. Unlike when I was still plagued by adolescent hormones, I don't wave my fist at the world and the normies. People lie, cheat, steal, etc., but I know that has nothing to do with my happiness (or lack thereof).

I'm not shaking my fist at the world and normies. I'm shaking my head. Then shut myself away because I have nothing to gain from them. They make me unhappy, but all I have to do is ignore and avoid them to best of my ability.

All the same, I find your perspective interesting. I also sincerely hope you find happiness!

 

[A Grey Cat]

Also, as an adult you have more freedom than you did in your youth

Ugh one of the few things I don't miss about being a kid is when adults would grab you by the wrist and lead you around like dogs on leashes...and I was probably the last generation that grew up where it was ok to grab a child by the ear if you were a salty old crab apple of a woman. The only thing worse than being led around by the wrist.

Sorry not the thread fir things you don't miss about being a kid...do we have one of those?

 

[The Cunting Death]

Adequate. Built a wardrobe because my place didn't have a closet. Tired.

 

[Harbinger of Kali Yuga]

I'm not unhappy because of hatred of the world or "society," or whatever. I think overall people do what they can to get by. Unlike when I was still plagued by adolescent hormones, I don't wave my fist at the world and the normies. People lie, cheat, steal, etc., but I know that has nothing to do with my happiness (or lack thereof).

The problem isn't how you feel about them. It's how they feel about you. Most of getting ahead is networking and schmoozing people up. If you're not woke today, they'll exclude you, is my point. I'm saying if you want to find meaning, it's probably best not to look to our social structure, don't look for huge fame, awards, or recognition for great ability, just either be proud of yourself or pour your heart into things that speak for themselves objectively.

 

[Sniperwoof]

Kind of worried about my job. They've been purging contractors like crazy and my hourly rate is pretty expensive for my position. I could be next.

 

[anustart76]

Kind of worried about my job. They've been purging contractors like crazy and my hourly rate is pretty expensive for my position. I could be next.

Time to update LinkedIn and start job searching. It's always a pain, but hopefully you find something before they come for you.

 

[Yamamura]

My Subaru Forester decided to finally 41% itself. Least it's not raining.

 

[Whitney Houston On Crack]

Ever since I had my brain surgery, every once in a while, due to the heat, a virus or if I eat like a pig or exert myself too much, my blood goes to my stomach and legs and my brain rapidly loses oxygen. I lose some of my hearing and sight, but if I manage to make it to a horizontal surface and lay down for an hour or so, everything goes back to normal.

Well, shit. Yesterday it caught me off guard. I was assembling an IKEA table and next thing I know I can't see or hear properly anymore. I tried to walk to the bed, but collapsed next to it. I was totally conscious, but couldn't move or speak.

Five minutes later, by chance, my parents decide to stop by my place, to see how I'm doing and to bring me some food.

My dad entered the room. That man gave out the most blood-curdling scream I've ever heard. He thought I was fucking dead. I couldn't say shit. I couldn't move. I couldn't lift my hand. My parents stood over me in horror for like a solid 30 seconds, before they noticed that I was still breathing. They got me on the bed and called an ambulance. By the time it arrived - 1 hour later, I was back on my feet feeling mostly fine. They didn't do shit. They checked my blood pressure, my blood sugar and that was that.

My parents, probably lost 10 years of their lives in an instant, though. My mom was raised atheist, but yesterday I heard her praying for the first time.

Oh, and everything happens, like four hours after I have written this in the "Would you Fly a F/A-18 or stick your dick in a toaster?" thread:

I'd try to see how high I can get the F-18 before my brain becomes oxygen deprived, or I succumb to the cold and loving embrace of death as I manage to break the limit of the troposphere.

So yeah. I'm not in the most optimal place right now.

 

[schatze]

Currently getting epilepsy from the background animation...

 

[Vingle]

I despise summer for how hot it is, it makes me tired and I don't want to do anything at all.

 

[Bloitzhole]

People don't genuinely have anyone's back.

I have friends I can call at any hour of the day and if they had to help me bury a body, I know I could rely on them to neither ask questions nor ever speak about it again. People like that exist, it's just hard to find them if you don't do so during your formative/educational years - lot less chances in everyday work/social life.

These are the roots of my problem, though. I don't have any hobbies because I don't really care about anything. Nothing intrinsically motivates me. I don't have any goals or things I want to achieve. I'm alive, and that's about it. And people don't believe me when I say I was like this even as a kid, but I was. It's not like life beat me down until I thought my dreams were unreachable; I just never had any.

I'm not unhappy because of hatred of the world or "society," or whatever. I think overall people do what they can to get by. Unlike when I was still plagued by adolescent hormones, I don't wave my fist at the world and the normies. People lie, cheat, steal, etc., but I know that has nothing to do with my happiness (or lack thereof).

Something that has worked for me during longer periods of feeling empty - and this is advice utterly contrary to what most people say is to seek validation from without. I do not mean compliments from people, but rather attempting to achieve a measurable positive impact, however minor, on other people's existence. Something that undeniably shows you that today, you did something that made a day measurably better for someone. Your brain can point at that and go "I did this. This is now better - it would not be better without me being here"
I get very bored and blue in winter, and in these times I tend to check around to see if some understaffed soup kitchen needs an extra hand, even if it's just washing dishes, or maybe to prep food for someone who is going through a tough time. I find cooking for other people deeply self-validating, because good food (not expensive, not fancy, just something warm that feeds the soul) can make anyone happier - and receiving it from another person unprompted can really take someone out of a dark place, if even just for a moment. It makes people feel taken care of, comforted, and that's a very valuable gift to give in and of itself - even if all you really did is bring around some (easy to prepare) home made apple pie.
I do not believe in altruism - but I am certain that acting in a manner that others might perceive as "selfless", can be deeply rewarding.

 

[JustSomeDong]

Goin to our annual private fireworks show/hog roast in a few hours. Gonna put my drone up to record the show. Every year we all pitch in for a Missouri roadtrip to get the good shit. I'm proud to say, we've managed to acquire about $4500 worth of goodies, for an astonishingly low $3500 bucks. Gonna be our biggest one, yet! It pays to be a loyal big spender every year. My buddy's F250 was god damned LOADED. We've got tube mortars up to 6 inches, plus loads of other shit, with a bunch of small stuff for the kids. And I just had to get my 15k blackcat roll. I only got the 5k one last time, and it left me wanting more. I want at least one 8 inch tube mortar next year. Thats how it goes, though, every year we one-up ourselves. Tradition is tradition.

I'll let you guys know if anyone loses any fingers or limbs. We've had good luck so far, but we all know it'll have to happen eventually. That's part of the fun of semi-rural, not-quite but still kinda redneck shenanigans! I'm excited as hell, and I hope all you wonderful people have a great day, and a great 4th, even for you filthy foreigners among us!

 

[Triple Flutz]

Having a great time now and all my bad feelings from last post about the summer heat being oppressive are gone after a perfect day during which all of my children were on their best behavior, we ate good food and did a bunch of activities, and then drove to hang out with family who are now mostly taking care of the kids whilst my husband naps and I play Slay the Spire, lmao. Fireworks in a bit which we can see from the backyard, the baby has hearing protection if needed, but with a bunch of young siblings, I'm sure they'd sleep right through them.

I have friends I can call at any hour of the day and if they had to help me bury a body, I know I could rely on them to neither ask questions nor ever speak about it again. People like that exist, it's just hard to find them if you don't do so during your formative/educational years - lot less chances in everyday work/social life.

I moved to a different country in my early to mid-20s where I knew no one other than my now husband, and haven't worked or studied a day since coming here and I still have a handful of friends who I can rely on for absolutely anything, and that's not even counting my husband and I's joint friends or his guy friends' wives who I've gotten close to as a result of my own marriage. In my experience, if you find someone who values loyalty, friendship, truth, and fidelity, they are often happy to function as a key to unlock friendships with similar people. There's no close friend I have who hasn't introduced me to people who would go on to become close friends in time.
For us Christfags, Church coffee hour is an amazing way to meet people though there's as many weirdos and otherwise incompatible people as anywhere else, my husband meets friends through hobbies, and for moms, playgroups and playgrounds are a great way to link up with another mother once you see that their kid isn't a demon and gets along well with your kid, strike up a chat with her, and make sure she passes the gut check and you, hers. It's definitely harder than it was in high school, opportunity isn't there quite as much and in this world, it's better not to be too comfortable around people at work who might seem safe but have the opportunity to tank your career if a misstep occurs, but it's possible. I never bring up politics or religion unless asked first, but I never lie about my beliefs, and that seems to attract the same kind of people and serves as a great buffer for people whose values are opposite mine.

 

[Betonhaus]

I got a job interview for a CNC operator at a cabinet maker tomorrow, I'm looking forward to it. I'm not sure of I'm ready to get back into machining, but as I will be working with wood instead of inconel I have a bit more confidence in my ability. I'm sort of kicking myself for buying a folding phone now that I will be working on a dusty environment but if I take precautions and keep my phone in my locker or in a baggie I should be ok.

I was hoping to break into a different career path, but that doesn't seem feasible at this time and telemarketing just barely pays the bills. This time I will do my best to start saving up an emergency stash so I can leave the city and restart in a little town that I can be a part of the community.