Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

TBH, you may be right.

I've been pulling my punches with her for the reasons @Himedall All-seeing Waifu set forth: We really don't know a lot about her, and I'm loathe to seem like I've giving Nick an excuse for his behavior.

But I guess Nick is gonna lie and claim that the thread is committing some horrible crime against her regardless of what anybody says, so I just DGAF anymore. Punch away. She might be the most degen person in the world for all I know.

EDIT TO ADD: Regardless of which one of them is the instigator of this shit, and assuming they other one doesn't like it, they have a legal remedy for that. It's called divorce.

That she tolerates her family situation says that, at an absolute bare minimum, she is neglectful to a harmful degree. There's no sympathetic light to see her in, only various shades of gray.

Kayla isn't all that different from a certain subgroup of home schooling mothers, which is "headcases not really coping." One thing that rang a weird note very early on was when Nick said they don't let anyone except a very, very small group, mostly relatives, watch their kids. And that it's fine because they're homebodies. That sounds like anxiety, and it's also atypical in close-knit religious communities of the type he implied they were part of. I don't know quite how to express this, but "I want to stay home alone in my house in the middle of nowhere with my kids and my husband who also works at home" is generally not a healthy formula

My thought is that perhaps Kayla had an idea of what life would be like living close-ish to family and raising children, but it did not turn out exactly as she expected. Balldo's parents bought then a house that seems fairly distant from most else (Kayla grew up in the urban areas IIRC), Nick doesn't care to get involved in much of the social scene, and she is stuck in a house by herself. I have seen bright cheery women wilt when cooped up in a house by abusive husbands or partners.

If ANYTHING happened with her family in the area, their church, or the homeschool co-op, (c.f. Nick's worst day during Depp) that would be a huge blow to her social network. It would coincidentally explain her change in behaviour--trying to please and latching on to Nick as the only other adult in her sphere of influence more than a few days a week.

Then Kayla came on and referenced various mental health concerns as well as obviously being pretty nuts.

Kayla doesn't seem like a likeable person, but we have about a million hours of Nick to talk about and not all that much direct interaction with her. Plus I'm sexist, and he's the man and making the money, and he should get his damned house in order.

The blowback and criticism from the internet would not have helped, and she has already self-described mental issues and her and her friends' use of salts and Kratos. It seems like bored housewife shite and schizoaffective personality plus stress is not a good result.

Didn’t it expire weeks ago? And Nick said he wants to see them in person in February to negotiate and tell him all his ideas for how to improve the platform? It doesn’t sound like they’re champing at the bit to lock him down.


He doesn’t have Vaseline to spare if his eternal butthurt is any indication.

Holy shit, it's already expired? It's fucking over. This is a plane that's run out of gas mid-air. All that's left are the savings, which probably aren't great considering that he supposedly lets his nanny spend $3000 a month on snacks. Unravelling might come sooner than I thought.

I believe his 12 month contract was signed December 2022. Someone will correct me if I am wrong. But the fact that they are not in any hurry to re-sign him certainly isn’t a good sign for Nick. Especially as they stopped giving him a prominent slot on their home page some weeks ago.

Signed in December but took effect in January, iirc. So if it hasn't expired yet it's due to any day now.

It was to start January 1st 2023 and run to December 31st 2023. It has expired.

Spoiler: Nick's talk about renewal + My commentary

At the end of the last year, Nick did a LOCALS stream that I summarized where he said he was trying to get out to Florida and RUMBLE in February (January was sooooo busy) to talk about a new deal and his litany of contract modifications.

More recently (on LOCALS) he has said that he is jot sure if he is going there or if they will talk remotely. He has to get a hold of them. He reiterated some of the changes he wanted to make.

Once could make the case that he is not hearing back from them, or it could just be his laziness.

Regardless, it is a pretty crap business plan to let your contract expire and not seek renewal 1-2 months in advance, ESPECIALLY if you are asking for modification. RUMBLE also has signed a bunch of new people, so if Nick does not hurry, will there be anything left?

I only started reading and posting in this thread because of his degenerate behavior, if he was just doing his lawtube thing I never would have bothered to read anything in here.

Spoiler: BJ math for no reason

The real question is, is it 830 per year or is that a lifetime quantity of blowjobs?

830/365=2.27 blowjobs per day

Let's be really optimistic and say Nick lives to be 80 years old and started having sex at 20 (I don't care enough to look this up)

830/60=13.83 blowjobs a year for 60 years. I guess that would be enough for once a month, doubling up on birthday month?

Does Nick want his knob slobbered on the daily or the monthly?

If its daily I hope Kalya doesn't have TMJ.

I am pretty sure this is drunk maths on doubling 365 incorrectly. He carried the hundreds place twice to get 830 instead of 730.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

It was to start January 1st 2023 and run to December 31st 2023. It has expired.

That’s what I thought. When it comes to media, if the platform/network is happy to let your contract lapse that is not a good sign to put it mildly. It also shows there’s not exactly a bidding war for his streams or any other significant demand for Rekieta content.

With his contract expired, it’s safe to assume he’s not getting a monthly fee from Rumble for January and is just getting a cut of Rumble Rants (or whatever their superchat equivalent is). I’m not sure what incentive Rumble has to start cutting him a monthly check again. It’s hard for me to try to think like a burnout drunk, but what leverage could Nick possibly believe he has with Rumble?

 

[Pippa's Greasy KB]

At the end of the last year, Nick did a LOCALS stream that I summarized where he said he was trying to get out to Florida and RUMBLE in February (January was sooooo busy) to talk about a new deal and his litany of contract modifications.

More recently (on LOCALS) he has said that he is jot sure if he is going there or if they will talk remotely. He has to get a hold of them. He reiterated some of the changes he wanted to make.

Once could make the case that he is not hearing back from them, or it could just be his laziness.

Regardless, it is a pretty crap business plan to let your contract expire and not seek renewal 1-2 months in advance, ESPECIALLY if you are asking for modification. RUMBLE also has signed a bunch of new people, so if Nick does not hurry, will there be anything left?

He also said he's on friendly terms with rumble, right? Which I think is a weird cope on his part cause why would they not be friendly with him? They're a company. Companies are always cordial at every interaction.

 

[AnOminous]

It’s hard for me to try to think like a burnout drunk, but what leverage could Nick possibly believe he has with Rumble?

Well obviously he could call them incel prudes or angrily lick a bottle at them and tell them they don't understand social cues, but he hopes they make a billion dollars. They don't want that, now, do they?

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

That’s what I thought. When it comes to media, if the platform/network is happy to let your contract lapse that is not a good sign to put it mildly. It also shows there’s not exactly a bidding war for his streams or any other significant demand for Rekieta content.

With his contract expired, it’s safe to assume he’s not getting a monthly fee from Rumble for January and is just getting a cut of Rumble Rants (or whatever their superchat equivalent is). I’m not sure what incentive Rumble has to start cutting him a monthly check again. It’s hard for me to try to think like a burnout drunk, but what leverage could Nick possibly believe he has with Rumble?

Unironically, I think it is his 'Social Media Experitse' that he is trying to peddle. Alternatively, he could be stuck in the 'fake it until you make it' philosophy.

Nick has been bombastic and overstated his qualifications on so many things (e.g. legal analysis, political analysis, social media analysis, fundraising ability, and relationship advice) that he might ACTUALLY believe his own propoganda.

 

[Space Pope]

Big Mersh energy over here.

The only time I remember Mersh is still alive is when he almost dies on stream or Porsalin drops a documentary. Nicki is going to slowly fade into streamer obscurity and won't even have a Porsalin feature made on him. Sad.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Unironically, I think it is his 'Social Media Experitse' that he is trying to peddle…Nick has been bombastic and overstated his qualifications on so many things (e.g. legal analysis, political analysis, social media analysis, fundraising ability, and relationship advice) that he might ACTUALLY believe his own propoganda.

Holy fuck, of course he does. This is the same guy who thinks he has wise insights to share on relationships and laments that Josh has deprived himself of Nick’s power to raise large sums of money.

It’s one thing to know that alcoholic delusion is real. But it’s altogether more jarring to encounter it in action.

My only question is whether or not Nick’s family still buys what he’s selling. If Kayla had just taken his word for it that Rumble was dying to renew his contract for another lucrative sum, I’d have loved to be a fly on the wall when she found out they let his contract expire and feel no urgency to renew it. That’s assuming she’s even aware.

 

[keke]

One thing that rang a weird note very early on was when Nick said they don't let anyone except a very, very small group, mostly relatives, watch their kids. And that it's fine because they're homebodies. That sounds like anxiety, and it's also atypical in close-knit religious communities of the type he implied they were part of.

Idk about that. Don’t most people just have a few family members that watch their kids and that’s all? They also have a nanny. And what you described is actually super normal and sensible if you don’t want your kid to get molested. I’ve never seen him say he was in a close-knit religious community, he definitely is involved with the church and does a homeschooling co-op thing but that doesn’t mean they’re BBQing together every week. Nick talks all the time how he goes to bars and clubs with Kayla, doubt the other parents in their homeschool thing are there. I know mothers with a lot of kids and their friends are typically other mothers so they don’t meet often, even the ones who work are at home all the time. His kids are also involved in a lot of activities so it’s not like they’re isolated.

 

[SpergioLeonne]

Well obviously he could call them incel prudes or angrily lick a bottle at them and tell them they don't understand social cues, but he hopes they make a billion dollars. They don't want that, now, do they?

Yeah, that all sounds like fun and games.

You forgot that Nick could wedge that bottle between his ass cheeks and send them a selfie of it.

 

[Chibitzen]

He also said he's on friendly terms with rumble, right? Which I think is a weird cope on his part cause why would they not be friendly with him? They're a company. Companies are always cordial at every interaction.

I can see it now. When it becomes evident he has been dropped, we'll get the Expansion Pack to the "I hope you make a million dollars" rant, except he'll say he knows how to run their company better and low and behold Rumble is doing it all wrong.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

He also said he's on friendly terms with rumble, right? Which I think is a weird cope on his part cause why would they not be friendly with him? They're a company. Companies are always cordial at every interaction.

Beware he who answers the question nobody asked.

No wonder Nick’s been depressed. It’s not the weather; it’s his life ruination speedrun.

 

[SpergioLeonne]

The blowback and criticism from the internet would not have helped, and she has already self-described mental issues and her and her friends' use of salts and Kratos. It seems like bored housewife shite and schizoaffective personality plus stress is not a good result.

Imagine if it was 100 years ago and Kayla could mail-order morphine from the Sears and Roebuck catalogue

Someone should remake The Road to Wellville with Nick and Kayla, except it would be confusing which character Nick should be since he’s a grifter, resents his parents’ upright character, has an overwrought wife, and likes putting things in his ass. He’s basically an amalgamation of all the male characters

 

[Retink Retunk]

or angrily lick a bottle at them

This sounds like some kind of modern Balldo version of the Shakespearian biting of the thumb at thee.

 

[Pippa's Greasy KB]

Alternatively, he could be stuck in the 'fake it until you make it' philosophy.

Man I've been there. It's a similar situation with nick but not really (basically the life changing outcome was inevitable but I was delaying it just to keep the routine going for as long as possible) but the anxiety it inflicted on me is something else. For me it was a period of about one year that happened a decade ago and to this day, once in a blue moon, it replays in my dream and I woke up a nervous wreck for 1 second until I realize I wasn't in that situation any longer.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

Holy fuck, of course he does. This is the same guy who thinks he has wise insights to share on relationships and laments that Josh has deprived himself of Nick’s power to raise large sums of money.

It’s one thing to know that alcoholic delusion is real. But it’s altogether more jarring to encounter it in action.

My only question is whether or not Nick’s family still buys what he’s selling. If Kayla had just taken his word for it that Rumble was dying to renew his contract for another lucrative sum, I’d have loved to be a fly on the wall when she found out they let his contract expire and feel no urgency to renew it. That’s assuming she’s even aware.

This is trusting Nick as a narrator, but I do not think that Kayla is much concerned about the money (outside spending it). In years past, I recall Nick recounting Kayla being worried about buying things and asking if she could spend money or if afford things (like the holiday they were currently on) and Nick would of course reassure her.

More recently, Nick has talked in detail about her garden shed full of 'stuff' and the fortune she has spent on LEGO. He has also talked about their lavish shopping sprees for clothing, their expensive hotels (with dollar amounts), and having to buy extra suitcases to mail things back home.

Remember, Nick's response to the early criticism and shaming of Kayla with accusation of infidelity was 'You cannot afford to entertain her'.

I am of the opinion that early on, Nick and Kayla's access to finances beyond necessities was limited. Since Nick has gained his own liquid cashflow, he has convinced Kayla that the money is there, and she may have gotten used to it. He seems to be basing his own worth on the cash he can make, and if that dries up, that might cause some friction.

Idk about that. Don’t most people just have a few family members that watch their kids and that’s all? They also have a nanny. And what you described is actually super normal and sensible if you don’t want your kid to get molested. I’ve never seen him say he was in a close-knit religious community, he definitely is involved with the church and does a homeschooling co-op thing but that doesn’t mean they’re BBQing together every week. Nick talks all the time how he goes to bars and clubs with Kayla, doubt the other parents in their homeschool thing are there. I know mothers with a lot of kids and their friends are typically other mothers so they don’t meet often, even the ones who work are at home all the time. His kids are also involved in a lot of activities so it’s not like they’re isolated.

I believe that I have seen old films set in the US where there were large picnics with 5 or more families where children ran amok and were generally watched by the assembled adults. This might be large pool of childcare that the OP is referring to.

Agreed that the social circles that Nick and Kayla more often patronise are NOT child-friendly or ones who will help watch their offspring. Perhaps this is a result of their own choices and the reason they do not have help to watch their children...

ETA: I believe that this might be where some of the concern expressed for the children might stem: if they cannot find help (or it is as unreliable as Nick claims at show cancelations) what are the odds that they are leaving them alone or transporting them in some kind of frazzled/altered state?

For the record, no one should contact anyone about this unless proper procedure is followed, but it is not as if there is an unfounded basis for idle speculation.

 

[Scout Trooper]

Voting has concluded and Nick Rekieta is the 2023 Lolcow of the Year.

 

[Hyacinth Bucket (Bouquet)]

Idk about that. Don’t most people just have a few family members that watch their kids and that’s all? They also have a nanny. And what you described is actually super normal and sensible if you don’t want your kid to get molested.

No, most people hire a teenaged babysitter or two. This was before Rittenhouse so I think before the nanny. And Drexel was on the approved list, so I don’t think molestation was a concern.

I’ve never seen him say he was in a close-knit religious community, he definitely is involved with the church and does a homeschooling co-op thing but that doesn’t mean they’re BBQing together every week. Nick talks all the time how he goes to bars and clubs with Kayla, doubt the other parents in their homeschool thing are there. I know mothers with a lot of kids and their friends are typically other mothers so they don’t meet often, even the ones who work are at home all the time. His kids are also involved in a lot of activities so it’s not like they’re isolated.

this is all pretty new. Before Rittenhouse he gave the impression that their primary contacts were church and family and specifically said they are homebodies who rarely go out.

 

[AnOminous]

Remember, Nick's response to the early criticism and shaming of Kayla with accusation of infidelity was 'You cannot afford to entertain her'.

Almost anything Nick says about Kayla sounds like negging of some sort. It always has some implied insult, like in this case, he's basically calling her a gold-digging whore.

He's portraying her as an incel stereotype of women. That's fucking weird as shit for a married man.

 

[Tubby Aardvark]

Congratulations Nick! 2023 was your year and I believe you can take 2024 too! Don't you ever pull up, just keep on going and harder and more retarded than before!

 

[Hazel Motes]

Very progressive of the Farms to award a black man lolcow of the year.