Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Dick Pooman]

From today's food review. I can assure you that this is not photoshopped in any way.

 

[Ponzo]

After watching this clip on Reddit, i want her to go to casper, stay there until thanksgiving or next christmas and then join cobes for his family dinner

"Oh wow it took you long enough to hand me the gravy you fucking asshole, you literally saw me with dry turkey you fucking stupid bitch, fucking retard, no self awareness, NONE, fucking ass stupid bitch"

 

[fukkit]

I dont feel so good, toobz.

 

[PetiteFeet]

I wish somebody who isn’t a retard or degenerate would befriend cobra. You can really see that’s what he longs for more than a girlfriend or an end to the dryspell is just an honest to goodness friend. So far anybody that befriends cobra there’s an ulterior motive, yes even darfliny since for him it was trying to get his own YouTube channel popular. Notice he stopped hanging out with cobra when he gave up on uploading shit? Oh of course he came back and the first time he hung out with Cobes in forever was also the first time he uploaded in forever and it was because he needed something.

You can see it pretty clearly when Mr. Green visited. He was a pretty a normal dude for cobra to hang out with and even though they only spent a short time together cobra seemed genuinely saddened to say goodbye.

I've said this before and I will probably repeat myself a lot in the future, but I agree 100%. Cobra needs an entirely normal adult man in his life, who isn't his dad/his dad's age. Mr Green was the best thing that happened to Cobes in literally years, even if Mr. Green is a ween (albeit not a malicious one).
Seeing Josh attempting to mirror Mr. Green in acting normal was heartwarming.

The best homeboy of Cobes' was definitely Darfliny in terms of Casperite normal behaviour. But yeah, everyone in Cobes' life wants something from him and I think that's really sad.
He desperately needs a person who is normal and isn't some messed up addict or a felon.

 

[Kugelsak Kastengrus 6th]

At this point, Cobes' biggest concern is probably getting his teeth fixed. Although the best course of action would be to have his shitty teeth yanked and set up with some partial dentures or get them all yanked and get full dentures. Dentures would be for the best since we all know how bad he is with oral hygiene. I'd probably chip in to crowdfund him a set of vampire/cobra fang dentures.

 

[bonified retard]

I've said this before and I will probably repeat myself a lot in the future, but I agree 100%. Cobra needs an entirely normal adult man in his life, who isn't his dad/his dad's age. Mr Green was the best thing that happened to Cobes in literally years, even if Mr. Green is a ween (albeit not a malicious one).
Seeing Josh attempting to mirror Mr. Green in acting normal was heartwarming.

The best homeboy of Cobes' was definitely Darfliny in terms of Casperite normal behaviour. But yeah, everyone in Cobes' life wants something from him and I think that's really sad.
He desperately needs a person who is normal and isn't some messed up addict or a felon.

Is there a big brothers of america program for retards? That was a common tv show trope so maybe he'd be open to it. It would be funny to hear him talk about how the trolls are jealous that they don't have a big brother that was a f-14 pilot in the navy and drives a motorcycle.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

I'm so pleased she doesn't have the paypig viewership to physically reach Cobes.

She's an actual danger, I don't want her anywhere near my boy.

 

[Janusz z Gliwic]

Cobes looks fucking awful with no facial hair. You can see the grotesque frog face he got from his mom (not FAS) and it really makes clear how ugly he actually is.

He at least looks younger this way. Biggest isssue are these horrible, whispy strands on his head. He could pull off a skullet, even, if he shaved them.

 

[Hennimore]

I'm so pleased she doesn't have the paypig viewership to physically reach Cobes.

She's an actual danger, I don't want her anywhere near my boy.

While I understand what you mean, I 100% want her moved in with Jord immediately. Would love to see him rationalize having to deal with the kind of shit he puts other people through.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

While I understand what you mean, I 100% want her moved in with Jord immediately. Would love to see him rationalize having to deal with the kind of shit he puts other people through.

Repition of the Scotty "Single Life, Single Life" video, comming in nicely toobs.

 

[Tetragrammaton]

I'm so pleased she doesn't have the paypig viewership to physically reach Cobes.

She's an actual danger, I don't want her anywhere near my boy.

i have seen cobes hang out with countless felons and drug addicts and somehow she comes off the most dangerous. like she gives me the vibes of someone who would just decide one day to stab you out of nowhere. cobes dont need that. he needs an actual sane normal person.

 

[behavioral swamp thang]

God he's so ugly it's unreal. The only normal features he has are his eyebrows and ears.
- Massive square squash head
- Wide apart eye balls, one's fishing and the other's searchin for bait
- Huge upturned nostrils with wide nose
- Huge wide philtrum/nasiolabal sulcus like an ape
- Wide mouth with massive lower lip and thin upper lip, also like an ape lol
- Lip to chin distance shorter than sulcus distance.... ew.. especially on a man
- Weak chin
- No neck to speak of
- Hamster cheeks
- Balding
- Corgi Legs
- Foot as wide as a dinner plate
- Handbell penis/balls
- Short torso

Ugh... alcohol pregnant, not even once.

Still holding out for the jessica/josh IRL relationship. Even if it won't happen, just speculating about it is hysterical. The thing that gives me hope is Josh loves to feel like he's in control, superior, and a smart daddy, which are things he feels with the degen Jessica. He was totally doing a mini scold in his video last night, feeling all high and mighty about his drinking being under control. Lol unreal. TWU.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

I like that he's leaving his shirt half unbuttoned, showing off his manly chest hair. Wonder if he's showing off for Jessica. TWU.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

i have seen cobes hang out with countless felons and drug addicts and somehow she comes off the most dangerous. like she gives me the vibes of someone who would just decide one day to stab you out of nowhere. cobes dont need that. he needs an actual sane normal person.

Unstable is the word your looking for, she seems like the type to have a dream about Cobes Cheating (while cheating herself) and taking it out on him, or the kind to escalate an argument just for fun kinda crazy and if drunk / high do something like take a swing at him with a bottle and get horribly lucky.

God he's so ugly it's unreal. The only normal features he has are his eyebrows and ears.
- Massive square squash head
- Wide apart eye balls, one's fishing and the other's searchin for bait
- Huge upturned nostrils with wide nose
- Huge wide philtrum/nasiolabal sulcus like an ape
- Wide mouth with massive lower lip and thin upper lip, also like an ape lol
- Lip to chin distance shorter than sulcus distance.... ew.. especially on a man
- Weak chin
- No neck to speak of
- Hamster cheeks
- Balding
- Corgi Legs
- Foot as wide as a dinner plate
- Handbell penis/balls
- Short torso

You see it's not just one thing, it's the whole ensemble of his appearance that adds up to a repugnant whole. the thing is he could mitigate most of that with just slightly better choices but he's so locked into his look he never will.

I like that he's leaving his shirt half unbuttoned, showing off his manly chest hair. Wonder if he's showing off for Jessica. TWU.

He's going through a period of feeling like hot shit again, Donos, viewers, booze, some F grade woman interested in him - he's riding high for the first time in ages because he's got a minor thing to feel good about, we're getting a slight glimpse into what he'd be like if he was slightly more functional or had a life outside the Bogcave and wasn't just sitting on his own stewing in a mix of his own juices, and home brew experiments gone wrong.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

He's going through a period of feeling like hot shit again, Donos, viewers, booze, some F grade woman interested in him - he's riding high for the first time in ages because he's got a minor thing to feel good about, we're getting a slight glimpse into what he'd be like if he was slightly more functional or had a life outside the Bogcave and wasn't just sitting on his own stewing in a mix of his own juices, and home brew experiments gone wrong.

Forget half shirt, it's time to eat some taco bell and show off his huge muscles dood.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

Forget half shirt, it's time to eat some taco bell and show off his huge muscles dood.
View attachment 5677187

Yea he's feeling good about himself at the moment, a slight boost to the ego gets us content.

 

[Dick Pooman]

That sexy goth bad boy who flexes on the trolls and eats tacos like an apple smells good

 

[The Blue Morpho]

Cobes is too annoying to deal with to maintain a genuine friendship with even a half-normal person. Who wants to go sit in his apartment drinking pruno on the cuck-couch off to the side while your host ignores you and sits awkwardly facing his computer so he can watch XXSniperWolf videos and yell at the monitor in response? Because thats what hanging with Cobra entails at this point.

Mr. Green or another Cobra watcher will put up with that for a day or two to slum it and catch a little of Cobra's magic in person, but someone with a life and hobbies and friends? Someone with qualities that would actually make them a good role model for Cobes? You think they have time for that?

At best Cobra can attract mooches like Warlord or his fake grift-hog e-girlfriend and other specimen who have it so rough they genuinely have things to gain by being Cobra's friend. It aint what the boy needs but its what he gets and that shouldn't surprise anyone because, after all, a friend in need is a friend indeed.

 

[TMDWTFIU]

Cobes looks fucking awful with no facial hair. You can see the grotesque frog face he got from his mom (not FAS) and it really makes clear how ugly he actually is.
View attachment 5676258

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

God he's so ugly it's unreal. The only normal features he has are his eyebrows and ears.

Imagine being some left-behind Roman in Britain in the early 5th century and this goof ball's ancestor shows up to shake you down for all the wine in your villa.