Bossman Austin Curtis Peterson / BossmanJack / AustinGambles / Austin_07 / irondollah - Gambling addict, convicted felon, scammer, and raging manchild that hates his fucking life, FAKE MONEY

[Collections Agent]

Every so often the silly IRS thing comes up and every time it's always the same answer: no, the IRS isn't going to go after him. That's less because there isn't potentially unpaid taxes to collect (though the actual amount probably isn't worth the effort), it's more because there's nothing to collect. He barely has a pot to piss in, and his "cash flow" is hard to garnish or otherwise seize. Plus that cash flow is always ultimately in one direction -- out of his pocket and into the casino's.

He's small potatoes, always winds up at near-zero anyway, and simply isn't worth the trouble.

Jokes aside now that he's getting directly paid from kick by the hour the IRS thing actually might become an issue

 

[Kees H]

Austin getting based again by banning a tranny in his Discord. Always happy to see he's with us on the TTD question.

 

[Admiral Throbnelius]

Austin getting based again by banning a tranny in his Discord. Always happy to see he's with us on the TTD question.

View attachment 5775464View attachment 5775467

Tranny rat kings BTFO by Bossman. With 41% odds, the house always wins.

 

[IsaacShraeder]

He has PTSD from Mines
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[S.C.U.D.]

Austin getting based again by banning a tranny in his Discord. Always happy to see he's with us on the TTD question.

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The tranny was also playing RS3 which is unforgivable in of itself.

 

[Kees H]

Austin's down bad, no one is juicing him, so he goes out to ask his mom for a juicer. His dad seems to prevent the juicer from happening. Fuck his life dude. Not even his mom will juice him, bro.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

here's a supercut of Bossman being extra pious on the $20,000 loss stream.

What's really funny is the supercut just sounds like a normal day in bossmans life.

 

[Alerion]

Bossman's hands are looking like he's been digging up weeds with his bare hands. They seem to be getting worse

 

[AnOminous]

He's endearing, he's cozy, he's not going to troon out, he's not going to molest discord kittens, I get it, but he is an addict. That's what addicts do.

This is why he's a cow and why he's entertaining. His emotions are all on the surface. There is nothing deceptive about him. He goes from ecstasy to utter despair in a minute's time.

As someone else pointed out, the "successful" gambool streamers generally approach it like soulless, emotionless husks, eking out their tiny advantages to make whatever money they can out of that. While that's seriously the only way to succeed at this shit, it has no audience appeal whatsoever compared to OH MY GOD OH MY GOD and OH FUCK I LOST IT ALL!

Bossman's hands are looking like he's been digging up weeds with his bare hands. They seem to be getting worse

Resin, dude.

 

[PositiveMonk]

he has to follow "content hygiene" rules, and has to respect the DMCA

"Inorganic? What does that mean? Like no sex on stream?" How did his brain even get here? Did he read organic as orgasmic? He really is a massive fucking retard

how does buying a ton of nice shit help?

We've watched him repeat the same behaviour of winning/losing. Every time he comes up he loses it all. The fact that he's making more of an effort to actually get some of those wins out is a refreshing change. I like to compare Austin to groundhog day. It's kind of like when Bill Murray starts to use the fact that he's reliving the same day for an eternity to actually do productive things. He's still trapped in the cycle, but at least there's some sort of reward to it.

Unboxing the new silver bar and gold coin

What the fuck happened to his finger that he's wrapped it like that?

 

[Biker]

will someone edit austins face on this please and thanks?

 

[Buck Broken Chimp]

This is why he's a cow and why he's entertaining. His emotions are all on the surface. There is nothing deceptive about him. He goes from ecstasy to utter despair in a minute's time.

As someone else pointed out, the "successful" gambool streamers generally approach it like soulless, emotionless husks, eking out their tiny advantages to make whatever money they can out of that. While that's seriously the only way to succeed at this shit, it has no audience appeal whatsoever compared to OH MY GOD OH MY GOD and OH FUCK I LOST IT ALL!

Resin, dude.

I recall Null himself talking about how Austin is a return to form for lolcows. He is a goofy dude that is fun to make fun of but not a big threat. He isn't a sexual degenerate with a huge troll base.

Austin hates his dad, his mom is his main enabler who as far as I can tell has enabled him his entire life. One could argue she was the first juicer, yet his dad keeps him from his mom's juice (insert Oedipus complex joke here or a joke about him and Chris Chan going to the same college). If Austin was smart and a psychopath. He wouldn't be gambling, but if we was smart, a psychopath and gambling like he is he could take out a big life insurance policy on his dad essentially turning his dad's life into another all or nothing bet, or he could force things a lot, but we won't and we are glad he won't because he is not a dangerous degen. That is ok we love Austin just the way he is LMAO.

 

[Twinkie]

will someone edit austins face on this please and thanks?
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21k hours in photoshop

 

[MadStan]

Well, the last two pages beats anything on Netflix that's for sure.

 

[PositiveMonk]

My buddy outlined his plan for fixing Austin. I thought I'd share. It's incredibly optimistic but pretty funny.

I wanna put Austin in a conservatorship and allow to continue what he's doing, but divert a specific percentage of his earnings immediately to a bank account he cannot control, distributed amongst high yield savings, managed ETFs, and other investments, then set up maximum quota of marijuana, vapes, and crack cocaine per day that he's allowed to use his share of his earnings on, with the crack cocaine quota being gradually lowered over time. Some of his money outside of his control will be used to enroll him in therapy which he will be mandated to attend weekly in order to keep his share of income. In addition to therapy he'd be required to shower at least 3 times a week and brush his teeth once a day. He'd also be required to spend some of his spendable income on repairing his walls and installing his door, and any further damages to the walls will be at his own expense.

 

[Elysian]

Jokes aside now that he's getting directly paid from kick by the hour the IRS thing actually might become an issue

He’s gonna have to bury his gold doubloons in the ground like a pirate to hide them from the taxman. X marks the juice.

 

[Maldron the Assassin]

My buddy outlined his plan for fixing Austin. I thought I'd share. It's incredibly optimistic but pretty funny.

GAMBLE IDIOT

 

[AnOminous]

GAMBLE IDIOT

You can't win if you don't bet. DUUUUUUUH!

 

[Elysian]

You can't win if you don't bet. DUUUUUUUH!

Easy shmoney, baby, easy shmoney!

 

[AnOminous]

That is ok we love Austin just the way he is LMAO.

This is sort of what I meant. Just looking at how he behaves, I realize I have a broken part of my brain that is exactly the same. I sympathize with this guy to a degree. If you have any gambool part of your brain you know where this guy is coming from.