Off-Topic Losing people to transgenderism support thread - Support group for trans widows and other people who lost loved ones to troonism

[gohi_trout]

There is a dude I know who is a troon. He is very smart and funny. I never use the “correct” pronouns because I just use his name. I always just figured it was all a phase and it would pass. Dude is part of a group I’m in (who I see on an almost daily basis). I found out last week that he is going away for two months. I didn’t want to assume stinkditch installation because I thought there was no way in hell I know someone crazy enough to do that. So I told myself maybe he is taking a cruise around the world (he likes to travel) or maybe a family member is on their death bed and wants to spend time with them. I know massive cope on my part.
Well today someone in our group said he was taking 2 months off for medical leave and that it was “elective”.
I am in shock. Is there any last ditch effort I can or should make to change his mind?
My hope is that he is getting "facial feminization" surgery because the risk of complications seems lower (source: SRS thread). Maybe then the worst case is he has an uncanny valley face like Dylan Mulvany. As annoyingly sexist “facial feminization” surgery is I would much rather he get that then the bottom surgery.

Honestly though… either way this is insane. I still can’t believe it.

Not to dog on you, but what else did you expect? Unless they show signs of backing away from the troon stuff, that's the way it goes.

 

[HalfPint]

Not to dog on you, but what else did you expect? Unless they show signs of backing away from the troon stuff, that's the way it goes.

No you’re absolutely right. TBH I think I’m still in shock and just needed somewhere to dump my thoughts.

 

[General Woundwort]

One of my friends trooned out after going to a therapist. He was 6'5" wide shoulders, loads of body hair, full beard, deep voice. A massive bear of a man, and very clearly a man. He was seeing a therapist because he had no confidence with women. He would always walk kinda hunched over, with his head down, almost like he was trying to hide from the attention that being 6'5" got him.
He was obsessed with his high school crush and would write her emails every couple of months basically saying how he regretted not making a move in school and how sad he was to see her live her life, get married, have kids. I don't know if he ever actually sent those emails, I hope he didn't and it was just therapeutic, but he said he did.
I assume she loved the attention cause she never blocked him or told him to leave her alone.

Anyway, his therapist was supposed to be helping him to build confidence and to get over this woman who barely knew he existed. But he comes back from therapy one day saying he might be trans, and he was thinking of going on hormones. Me being the unfiltered tard that I am, told him it was a bad idea, that because of his height, he would never pass as a woman because women just don't get that big. And that not being able to fit in anywhere would probably make him feel more isolated and alone. That maybe he should try to not stalk this woman on social media and to stop sending her messages, come out with us more and meet more women.
He completely cut me off after his next therapy session.

I can't help but think his therapist said something stupid like I was trying to stop him living his best life or whatever wank they say to keep people as permanent customers. Fucking abuser tactics to isolate people from their friends and family, the whole movement is a cult.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I’m currently in the process of losing my fiance to this shit and I absolutely have no idea what to do

You gotta put a pooner clause in the pre-nup, even if this seems to blow over.

Also for ladies, it's fiancée; don't start accidentally "affirming" now.

Me being the unfiltered tard that I am, told him it was a bad idea, that because of his height, he would never pass as a woman because women just don't get that big. And that not being able to fit in anywhere would probably make him feel more isolated and alone. That maybe he should try to not stalk this woman on social media and to stop sending her messages, come out with us more and meet more women.

Thank you for being honest with him, and giving some good advice. If you can still send him a message anywhere, I would tell him honestly something along the lines that you know he's being told he can't have any contact with you, but you'll be around if he decides otherwise. Not "only if you detroon," just leave the door open.

You might want to start getting ahead of this in the friend group, though. One friend's trooning out can be like a divorce, where some of the friends go with just one half of the couple and things are awkward up to acrimonious. Keep on the "Bob's new therapist" / "it's like a cult" / "sigh, poor guy" angle and don't mention TTD, because there's a good chance that the brainworm inside your friend's body is going to be telling people you're a bigot with no further explanation, any day now.

 

[Null]

(btw she’s expressed that she’s unsure about surgeries and T at this point)

then she's just a retard. like wtf is she going to do? call herself Charlie and fuck up her boobs with a binder and nothing else? what's the point?

if I were you I'd flat out tell her it's going to be over. don't sugar coat it by saying "well.. im just not gay.... i heckin love only real women" because ruining a relationship that way is gender euphoric.

sounds like she should get a fucking job and a hobby.

 

[SpinelessArtist]

Yeah I’m a dude 25 and her 26 we’ve been together 9 years and have known eachother since 13 years of age I’ve told her I’m not gay and don’t want to date a man but she’s very adamant about this right now and I don’t want her to double down cause of my push back on the other hand I’ve been trying to accept it but I just can’t lol (btw she’s expressed that she’s unsure about surgeries and T at this point)

Always the fujos and their gay sex fantasies. It's a sick mixture of misogyny, peer-pressure and pornsick behaviour. Just give up on her, man. Whenever something like that happens, it's the person who has to figure it out for themselves, outside pressure almost never works. People have to reach the bottom of the barrel to realize they've fucked up. Poonerism is the anorexia of modern times. It's a stubborn disease that only strengthens the more validation one gets. If she loses you then hopefully it will make her learn faster. Good luck with everything

 

[sheepworldvizor]

Yeah I’m a dude 25 and her 26 we’ve been together 9 years and have known eachother since 13 years of age I’ve told her I’m not gay and don’t want to date a man but she’s very adamant about this right now and I don’t want her to double down cause of my push back on the other hand I’ve been trying to accept it but I just can’t lol (btw she’s expressed that she’s unsure about surgeries and T at this point)

Maybe she’s just a lesbo? 9 years is a long time. Anyhow, I wouldn’t trust her to raise a normal kid, if that’s a goal you have for the future.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I wouldn’t trust her to raise a normal kid, if that’s a goal you have for the future.

Good point; this will come up again.

Call me a romantic, but there's a possibility you won't have to throw out the entire girlfriend--but it'd be hard work and a willingness for honest communication on her side, not like throwing a switch.

If she's capable of discussing gender junk without stomping off, if you guys can really talk about things, if you can help her explore why she feels this way in a way that isn't the thought-stopping gendersoul, then it might be doable. But you have a lot of people on the Internet, and a lot of people IRL if you're young, who are right there to affirm her and tell her you're awful, if she prefers surface-level ass pats and goes looking for that instead.

I think it's like dating a sober alcoholic, but you're in the part of her arc where she hasn't done any soul-searching or even thought about quitting. Watch for your own safety, get prepared to bail, don't make any compromises "just for now," start feeling out your own friends and family for whether they'll immediately ice you out if she says the magic gender words.

 

[Norbert the Tiger]

Yeah I’m a dude 25 and her 26 we’ve been together 9 years and have known

I am sorry for your loss. Many believe there is no love like one's first love. And the proponents of transgender lunacy dare to ask "why do you care?" or "how does this effect you?"

Is there any last ditch effort I can or should make to change his mind?

I would compile a list of materials showing what a horror show the stinkditch is. Show him the horror shows of the stinkditch. There are so many accounts of troons being rightly rejected by partners they desire. There are accounts of naive young men who bought into the "trans women are women" (or they actually have sex with a trans "woman") and they are harrowing. There are tweets and memes detailing how the stinkditch is not a real vagina.
Might as well go for broke because in my book, once a troon goes beyond the point of no return (zippertit, stinkditch, etc), that person has lost all humanity. They cease to be people, as they are neither really men nor women. However rude or unpleasant it is, your friend's humanity is on the line. That's why tolerating this stuff just makes it worse. Knowing how obstinate those in the cult of troon are, you'll probably lose him as a friend, but at least your conscience will be clear and you will know you did what you could.

 

[Clyde Cash's Left Teste]

I am sorry for your loss. Many believe there is no love like one's first love. And the proponents of transgender lunacy dare to ask "why do you care?" or "how does this effect you?"

I would compile a list of materials showing what a horror show the stinkditch is. Show him the horror shows of the stinkditch. There are so many accounts of troons being rightly rejected by partners they desire. There are accounts of naive young men who bought into the "trans women are women" (or they actually have sex with a trans "woman") and they are harrowing. There are tweets and memes detailing how the stinkditch is not a real vagina.
Might as well go for broke because in my book, once a troon goes beyond the point of no return (zippertit, stinkditch, etc), that person has lost all humanity. They cease to be people, as they are neither really men nor women. However rude or unpleasant it is, your friend's humanity is on the line. That's why tolerating this stuff just makes it worse. Knowing how obstinate those in the cult of troon are, you'll probably lose him as a friend, but at least your conscience will be clear and you will know you did what you could.

There really does need to be an easy to send doc of the horrors of stinkditches.

 

[F40PH]

I’m currently in the process of losing my fiance to this shit and I absolutely have no idea what to do she’s a tumblr and x user and has a hyper fixation on yaoi since early teens. I just feel like everyone is clapping and cheering her on for this while I’m the only outlier questioning it and she’s beginning to resent me for it and I’ll just end up losing her completely it’s just so fucked up.

My wife uses both X and Tumblr as well, but she isn't threatening to cut her tits off. I'd get the fuck out of this relationship ASAP, trans shit aside, she sounds severely mentally unstable. You mentioned in your later post that she's "questioning whether or not to take T and cut her tits off" so even she knows that (deep down) she shouldn't be doing this but she's going ahead with her troonery anyway. She's been recruited into the cult, and as a result, is a lost cause IMO - You're ideologically incompatible to such a degree, that even if you can stop her from trooning out, the relationship is probably fundamentally broken on some deep level you cannot fix.

How did this shit even start? You say she's your fiancée, but this shit doesn't happen over night. Didn't you ever discuss things with her when she first showed warning signs? Do you two never talk about things or something? I agree with Null, I don't think you should be doing this gay gender-affirmation shit with her. Just tell her you don't want to be with a tranny because they're universally insane pornfreaks, and you're worried about her mental health.

I'm really sorry bro, really, I am, but sometimes you have to do the hard thing. I'd seriously look at cutting it off. Do not ever marry this woman. She will destroy your entire life sooner or later.

 

[Mango Cobra]

call herself Charlie

I mean atleast Charlie is genuinely a girl's name (Short for Charlotte).

But seriously @Nekomander - put your foot down and say no. Either she chooses you or she chooses the gender cult. This isn't the time for bargaining - This is the time for giving an ultimatum of "Me or being a Pooner".

 

[Lavender Moth]

Yeah I’m a dude 25 and her 26 we’ve been together 9 years and have known eachother since 13 years of age I’ve told her I’m not gay and don’t want to date a man but she’s very adamant about this right now and I don’t want her to double down cause of my push back on the other hand I’ve been trying to accept it but I just can’t lol (btw she’s expressed that she’s unsure about surgeries and T at this point)

This made me sad.

Speaking as someone who lost one of the few partners I was serious about to trans cultism -- DO NOT under any circumstances affirm or accept her "as a man". You are not doing either of y'all a favor. You're hurting yourself with the self-gaslighting (you can't accept it because she will never be a man and you know this; hell, it seems even she knows this lol) and you're hurting her by enabling her descent into a cult. You love her, right? So stop that shit. Right now.

I'm personally one hair away from being irreversibly blackpilled on tranny shit concerning relationships, so my knee-jerk thought is to cut your losses and run. I know that's harsh, but when specifically concerning women with ROGD (which I'm assuming is what's happening with her?), the untreated mental illness that's causing the so-called feeling of dysphoria is often too strong for you to deal with in a manner that's helpful. At least, that has been my experience. If you go that route & bail, let yourself feel angry. Let yourself cry, and feel cheated, and lost, and all that sad shit. Don't run from those feelings, you need to let yourself feel them because she IS turning you into a victim by doing this, but don't wallow and let it destroy you. I HIGHLY recommend seeking out a therapist who hasn't been pozzed by the troon shit to help guide you through the pain. Think of it like lancing a huge boil -- it's going to hurt like all hell, but when it's over, you will feel better.

If you wanna go the route and attempt to save your relationship, it will essentially only work if you can engage with her the way Aunt Carol suggested. You need to be able to have a gentle but firm and grounded discussion with her concerning the gender shit. No beating around the bush -- address things concretely as they are in reality. Keep a cool head, and try to talk to her in ways that engage her critical thinking/encourage her to ruminate on the underlying feelings that are the root cause of her ROGD. If you can encourage her to go to a NON-AFFIRMING therapist, this may help wonders and take the burden off of you. If not, I recommend looking into videos and books on how to kindly challenge family members who have become entangled in a cult, as all trans is is a body modification cult where a false (and ultimately unobtainable at that) image of the self is worshiped in lieu of a god. Find ways to get her away from her computer and her groomer friends. There are also some decent guides on how parents deprogrammed their daughters floating around on places like 4thWaveNow and many of them offer good advice for dealing with ROGD women of any age.

At the end of the day, regardless of which path you choose, I wish you luck. Do not forget to be kind to yourself.

 

[m1ddl3m4rch]

How did this shit even start? You say she's your fiancée, but this shit doesn't happen over night.

hyper fixation on yaoi since early teens

Always the fujos and their gay sex fantasies. It's a sick mixture of misogyny, peer-pressure and pornsick behaviour.

Longing for a romanticized, idealistic impossibility will kill you. Saturation in tv, movies and porn makes reality feel less real. Real life can never measure up to the hyper-reality of media.

Her desire for a man has internalized into thinking she can be one. Setting your heart on something that cannot be is disastrous. Desire can waste you away while you wait longing for its object to materialize.

 

[Nekomander]

This is a lot to take in especially since we’re talking about someone I’ve spent half my life with so far but I will try my best.

 

[m1ddl3m4rch]

This is a lot to take in especially since we’re talking about someone I’ve spent half my life with so far but I will try my best.

Remember that if you break up, you didn't leave her; she started going where you cannot follow.

 

[F40PH]

This is a lot to take in especially since we’re talking about someone I’ve spent half my life with so far but I will try my best.

In the grand scheme of things, you're only 25. You could take the last 10 - 12 years as experience, remember the good parts for what they are and move on with the rest of the long life ahead of you, or spend another 10+ years with her and eventually grow to regret every moment you wasted appeasing her delusions. I get how painful of a decision something like this can be, but BPD pussy is just never worth it bro. If she's in the gender cult, she's already gone and you should be heading for the hills.

Best of luck sorting things out, keep us posted if you want. I hope you do what's right for yourself.

 

[astrohairlip]

I knew Earl, also known as Dayton Hypernova or the "he beats me!" tranny, who has a thread on this forum, from way back before he transitioned. Pretty sure he has schizophrenia and some other shit going on, but it was really sad seeing him turn into some weird fuck who bears little resemblance to the guy I knew him as when we were young. I've known some other people who turned into "nonbinary" people who are just depressed and miserable. I just limit my time around anyone like that, but it feels like they're unavoidable.

 

[AfghanBlue]

just watching this, its interesting.

(skip the still title card that comes up, it lasts fora few minutes and just go along to the split screen bit)

 

[Three Gorillion Dollars]

I can't believe these two posts are right next to each other.

I was meaning to reply to this earlier, but I didn't get around to it.

I'm just so tired of it. But that's not true, really. I'm weary. Tiredness is something you can fix with a good night's rest, but weariness is something that's depleted your whole entire self. All the places I used to enjoy on the Internet are infested by the trans-plague. All the places I used to consider home are filled with people who are detached from reality. Communities are dominated either numerically or politically by males with such poor self-image and such potent porn addictions that they think calling themselves women will make people like them, will make people think they've achieved something, will somehow give back years of their life and undo their baldness, their wrinkles, the fact they never had sex in high school.

There's so much I want to say, but I just can't find the words. I mourn the people, and the communities, and the past. I can't believe how normalized this is. It's just expected that you'll see some brave transwoman winning every LGBT award a company can give them, being the person in any queer spotlight list, stomping all over women who didn't just decide to put on a skirt one day. It's just expected that you'll be going through social media and see wholesome trans memes about puppy play or littles and diapers or girldick whatever the fuck kind of degenerate fetish shit that we all used to understand should be kept away from prying eyes.

I've never seen anything like this in my life. I've never heard about it. Everyone I know who talks about this stuff in person hates trannies. They hate how they're basically de-platforming females and fucking with their sport achievements and their medical needs because it gets them off. They hate how they're ruining gay and lesbian culture. They hate how they're drama magnets who infest everything and threaten legal action at the slightest provocation. They hate how any and all political discussions are co-opted by transwomen who make it all about them. It all feels hopeless. Everything I enjoy has been infected by this crap.

And so I'm here, because there's nowhere else where we can talk about it.