Hi all, this is my first kiwifarms post. I was going to just lurk forever but this thread has inspired me to post here. Forgive me if any of this comes off retarded or hard to read, it's been awhile since I've posted on a forum of any kind. Additionally, if it sounds long winded its because its been pretty crappy and also I am a woman. But as my name suggests, my brother is indeed a full on brick.
This happened pre pandemic when I was living overseas and he trooned out. He started it by calling up all my family members to give us his big coming out speech, to which we were all either surprised or didn't care. I, being the supportive young lib I was, was shocked but responded kindly with support. I was kind of down for the cause back then, albeit completely ignorantly. I didn't anticipate him then coming out as "poly", saying he was separating with his fiance and was now in a troon/woman/troon relationship. I'll never forget the look on my dad's face when I told him who the married couple my brother was with in all his pictures.
Flash forward to when I'm back stateside and I can visually see his trooning. Ugly dresses, wearing wigs over his longtime bald head, ugly makeup and stealing my stuff when I had moved back in the family home temporarily. It was all there. Additionally, as his fiance had left him so he moved back home (rent free, of course, as he's a poor twans giwl). I had to pay rent, despite having no job (yet) as I was fresh off the boat so to speak. But what stuck out to me was his anger, his obvious aggression towards people in his life. Family, even. Stomping through the house, temper tantrum fits, and the big incident where my dad was in hospital recovering from a stroke had accidentally misgendered him when he went to pick him up. This caused my brother to have a whole meltdown. He cut my dad out for several months and said he was "done with him". That my dad was evil, transphobic, ect and raged at him in the hospital that day even. The red flags were pouring for me, yet still it didn't click for me (again, retarded).
It doesn't get better though, it gets worse. He stays in the poly relationship where essentially he was just intruding on a mentally ill straight marriage and then that falls apart (go figure). Then, my dad is set to move cross country and all of his kids agreed to help him. That is, me and my 2 brothers (including the brick). I show up, the other 2 do not. When they do, they break out into a big fight and leave again, just taking the furniture they want and head off, steaming. Whatever. Me and dad pull it off and pack him up. It was hot and hard, and my dad was elderly and in poor health. But we did it, right? No. My dad died 2 days into his road trip. His heart gave out. I felt strongly like if he had been helped, he wouldn't have exhausted himself. It was wrong to leave him last minute to do it himself. I told my brother to his face for the first time ever I believe this was "male entitlement" and a woman would not have had the rage fit that lead to abandoning her dad. Terfy, yeah probably, but I was early 20s still by this point so whatever. This prompted him to grab me by the shirt and pull a fist on me in front of my mom and brother. I just told him "Is that what you really want to do?" And he smartly retracted. I have avoided speaking to him at all costs since, except the time he reached out to me on TDOV to say he'd "do it again to anyone that got in my ...." Nowadays, he just denies it ever happened. In the minds of my family, I was the aggressor. They turn my one word "MALE" into an hour long speech about how he'll never be a woman and use that to justify my brothers infantile violence. They blame me, and it's been quite a trip to see them turn on me from the quiet, liberal feminist they knew to being some ultra trump magatard just because of that one word I said "MALE". It's been years and they still try to gender him as he wishes, despite him dressing mostly male now, wearing no makeup and usually never any wig. So he looks as most men his age look, just with a fake nasally voice and his fat slightly distributed different.
I lost my brother that day, but I've been free ever since. I didn't really lose any other family from it, but I'm aware I'm seen as basically the devil now because of it. I didn't tow the party line. But honestly, I wouldn't change it for anything.
Thanks for reading, if you have any questions feel free to ask here or DMs
