How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

Aib Ld said:
I'm not really sure. I'm conflicted on what I want to do, want to be, etc. Bunch of covid and other stuff absolutely slashed my moving plans, ruined my job, can't get any future employment, can't build my resume because said declines, and so on, so forth.

I'm not in despair over my life, strangely enough. I'm simply existing in some void. It will probably be a while until the gravity of the situation really settles emotionally on me.
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It hit me earlier than I thought.
I'm so tired of being single. I'm so tired of tornadoes, and not having a basement for protection against them because the ground level said "get fucked". I'm tired of getting hit nearly two times in a row. I'm so tired of not having a job anymore. I'm so tired at looking at that house that was affordable being snapped up by some random millionare who probably overpaid. I'm so tired of looking at own area turning downright ugly: neighbors moving off to who knows where, schools closing, a new neighbors invited some ghetto trash bf who doesn't give a shit that he's ruining the peace of the block firing off his guns and firing off fireworks which nearly shakes the block, and so on. I'm so tired at doing research on moving and building up savings for years only to use it all because of covid, making me feel like I wasted 3-4 years of my life. I'm so tired of not being able to do what I want, both because of lack of money and a disability of being deaf. I'm so tired of not knowing what I want. I'm so tired of seeing people younger than me already succeeding life.

I'm so tired of everything.
 
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My cat has a pea-sized tumor on his skin in the mastoid region of the skull behind the base of his ear. It has doubled in size from the head of a pin to its current size in two months. The veterinarian took a look at it on the 7th of this month, and did not aspirate it because the tumor is in such a bad spot as she was afraid of hitting a nerve or a major blood vessel.

Instead, she recommend I have it surgically-removed and have the entire growth evaluated when it is off the cat. It should be simple surgery as it is confined to the skin as of now. The problem is that the veterinarian is booked for surgery until the 4th of June.

We suspect it is a mast cell tumor like the tiny, precancerous one taken off my cat's face three years ago. Fortunately, the prognosis for something like this is very good as they are unlikely to return if removed when this small and have not gotten a chance to spread even if cancerous.
 
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Have my exam tomorrow. Wish me luck.

bile demon said:
What's the air like at your job? Is it a building with air conditioning and central heating, or a place where you can keep the windows open? I assume you both live and work in a city rather than in the countryside.
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I work from home, but I do live in the city, yes. I could open the windows, but I don't want bugs getting in.
 
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A coworker whom I have grown to loathe was absent today, so that was a plus. She is a trainee for some management position and has pajeet-like work habits despite being white, which makes her difficult to be around. She is especially fond of assigning a certain make-work task to her inferiors every day with a smirk and a bit of pomp. I am ashamed to admit that I had been working at this place for almost a month before I realized that I could just make up results because no one looks at them; she just wants people to see her giving orders.
 
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Sexy Senior Citizen said:
I was fine until I read Null's manifesto. Now I'm just sad because the world seems to inevitably becoming fake and gay.
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I haven't been listening to mati much lately because it's too black pilling. I'm at a positive-ish point in my life and I don't need null's negativity dragging me down. Other than avoiding the fact that the world is becoming more fake and gay by the day, I'm sunshine and rainbows.
 
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My father asked to meet.

He wants us all to do family therapy. Like, as many of us who agree to it.

I cannot shake the conviction that actually, he just wants to find out if anyone has been, or is going, to the police.

I'm not participating. There is nothing that I or anyone else is going to get from this.
 
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obsdj said:
Do not allow anyone to guilt-trip you about this decision. "But faaaaaaaamily" is meaningless in the face of abuse.
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Thank you, kiwisibling. There is no rug big enough to put this mess back under. And doing that the first time is, well, how we got to where we are now.

Covering his ass has always been my father's number one priority, but that can't be anyone's priority now.

I just want the whole thing to go away. Roll on 2025 or 2026. Even 2027
 
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A girl I fancied quite a bit joined the Legion of Zipper Tits.

We're still friends it just sucks that she went he.

I've become a joke amongst my friends due to the odd coincidence that whichever gal I have a fancy for either goes gay or tranny.
 
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Just waiting until the next appointment with my therapist to discuss TMS treatment because medication doesn't work fuck all on me. Dysthymia and severe anhedonia's got my life fucky right now (actually for the majority of my life) but I've been working on it since the covid lockdowns were lifted
 
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Whats your project?
Foxymophandlemama said:
My project got approved!!! I'm so happy. My last employer absolutely destroyed my confidence and now that I have more creative control at the new job I am starting to see my potential.
I celebrated with a looooong nap with Cat #1 sleeping on my legs. Pure heaven.
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