Tabletop Roleplaying Games (D&D, Pathfinder, CoC, ETC.)

Optimism Appreciator said:
5e players (Yes, "5e players" is my version of "niggers". How could you tell?) genuinely cannot wrap their heads around the joy of accusing your former comrade of being a communist-mutant-traitor so they can get executed and you get a heap of good boy points with friend computer.
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Which is ironic considering the playerbase of 5e are just the type of fags that post on RPG.net, which is run like a Paranoia LARP.
 
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The new Dungeons and Dragons Orc.
 
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Tom Bombodildo said:
I'm kind of surprised I haven't seen more or really any PBP games in the Games board.
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I don't think a play-by-post would work here due to the hostility and lolcow nature of KF generally. It's like how there's two kinds of gyms. One type will help you get into shape, and the other type with shout insults and throw drinks on you for being fat. Kiwi Farms would be the latter. A play by post would have to be performative for an audience for the players to not be ridiculed in other threads.

Since we're on the topic of a KF TTRPG. I might as well throw my hat in with my ideas and how I would run it.

I have way too many ideas to list. I don't know if it's normal to have way more ideas than games to use them in, but that's me. Broadly speaking I'd do it one of two ways.

First is to do the @Alabama Gamer thing and have a current year parody with all the non-PC/"offensive" stuff KF expects. Given my James Bond esc spy game occasionally flies too close to the sun by accident, that would be an obvious fit.

The other is to run a fairly vanilla game. My usual tactic of running an edited Paizo adventure path or a broad 5e fantasy adventure.
 
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anti SJW said:
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The new Dungeons and Dragons Orc.
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Have they finally realized black people don't play RPGs and decided to try to pander to latinos?

I don't think most Mexicans are going to appreciate their abuela being depicted with tusks and morbid obesity.
 
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I'd be potentially up to run a small one-shot online for people here. It would certainly be a rare chance to find players who I'd enjoy having in a group. But the challenge of doing so without PL'ing would be significant. I would reserve the right to decline someone, especially if their post history was either minimal or just filled with trolling.

It would also be a fairly "normal" style game, i.e. not filled with KF themes or in-jokes. There's a difference between "not filled with uwu types and Progressives" and going full 4chan.

What I would do would be to pick a fairly simple system (I have one in mind) and hand out pre-gens. I don't see it as feasible to do slow play by post, though it's conceivable (maybe) one could do it purely in chat rather than voice. I'm thinking Matrix could work?

You would kind of need some sort of virtual table top. I have software that could work for that but not sure about using it without PL'ing. You guys could use it without PL'ing just by connecting via VPN. But not sure I could host without doing so.
 
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anti SJW said:
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The new Dungeons and Dragons Orc.
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God I hate this twee, toothless art style that has permeated fantasy. Nothing here inspires a sense of adventure, wonder, or danger. It's more concerned with portraying a sacarine faux-realism than portraying fantasy.

Also woman with the mental illness undercut front and center to let you know this is for the Modern Audience.
 
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Francis York Morgan said:
God I hate this twee, toothless art style that has permeated fantasy. Nothing here inspires a sense of adventure, wonder, or danger. It's more concerned with portraying a sacarine faux-realism than portraying fantasy.

Also woman with the mental illness undercut front and center to let you know this is for the Modern Audience.
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Frazetta spinning in his goddamn grave at how gay this fucking art is.
 
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Judge Dredd said:
It's like how there's two kinds of gyms. One type will help you get into shape, and the other type with shout insults and throw drinks on you for being fat.
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There's a third kind that feeds you pizza and bagels while telling you you're beautiful just the way you are while running off the people that actually want to seriously get in shape.
 
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Francis York Morgan said:
God I hate this twee, toothless art style that has permeated fantasy. Nothing here inspires a sense of adventure, wonder, or danger. It's more concerned with portraying a sacarine faux-realism than portraying fantasy.
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It's portraying fantasy, just a weird, twisted one that no one else really likes. It's like a progressive version of the Red Dwarf episode Better Than Life.

I was mocking a post in the ResetEra thread yesterday where a ResetEra member laid out his dream CRPG, and it was nuts. It included things like a lesbian relationship that falls apart and telling ghost stories, and a while ago there was the whole Strxhaven debacle where a gay prom was a major scene. Even in their fantasies, they are sexual and social fuck ups.
 
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Owlbear said:
IMO a combat round should generally take 2 minutes per person including the off-topic discussions and the dice rolls. I also don't think D&D or PF is very good at that, as a game system (too much math, even in 5e), but D&D players actually can learn the rules. It's a pretty big lift to actually learn the core rules of 3.5 or PF1, but you can do it.

I really think a big part of this is that you (the player) should not be out-thinking your PC. The idea of roleplaying falls out the window with players tryharding in every combat. If your PC has 8 int, just walk up and hit them like the dumb box of rocks you are. If your PC has 20 int, you've earned a bit of a think. Cutting off the strategy discussion, IMO, is actually part of this - a round is 6 seconds of real time, and a lot of players want to spend the first 15 minutes of that 6 seconds making a game plan.

I believe the 5e monster manual (and to some degree the 3.5 and PF MMs) was actually balanced around people tryharding, which doesn't help.

In my experience, 3.5/PF1 generally has more things to add or subtract, but 5e has a shit load of temporary modifiers to track - including counting your "advantages" and "disadvantages." PF2 does a better job (except for the part where it was written by woke trannies).
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Advantage and disadvantage don’t work like that. If you have any number of factors that would impose both on you, then they just cancel each other out rather than stacking. For example, if you have two factors that grant advantage, but one that grants disadvantage than you have neither advantage nor disadvantage.
anti SJW said:
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The new Dungeons and Dragons Orc.
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anti SJW said:
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The new DM screen for modern audiences.
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Judge Dredd said:
It's portraying fantasy, just a weird, twisted one that no one else really likes. It's like a progressive version of the Red Dwarf episode Better Than Life.

I was mocking a post in the ResetEra thread yesterday where a ResetEra member laid out his dream CRPG, and it was nuts. It included things like a lesbian relationship that falls apart and telling ghost stories, and a while ago there was the whole Strxhaven debacle where a gay prom was a major scene. Even in their fantasies, they are sexual and social fuck ups.
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It’s something that I’ve come to term “anti-escapism.” When you have activists involved in things that are purely recreational, it creates guilt in them. Any time spent playing elf games is time not spent dedicated to cause that will prevent them from being gaybashed/genocided/climate changed out of existence (see also: David/Olivia Hill). So, their hobbies must be changed into a vehicle for their activism and to “reflect the world around us!” and along the way, the chuds must be driven out in order to get there.

And then they wonder where all of their sales went.
 
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Ghostse said:
Old and Busted: Orcs are coded for niggers
New Hotness: Orcs are coded for spics
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Woke: Orcs are NIGGERS.
Broke: Orcs are WYPIPO!
Bespoke: Orcs are ISRAELI JEWS!
Brain Problems said:
Frazetta spinning in his goddamn grave at how gay this fucking art is.
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The Chaddest and GOAT fantasy artist, Boris Vallejo (and Julie Bell).
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