Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[TheTourist]

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the boy is quite unkind to himself.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

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He should just move into a box under the overpass. He's already got the look.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

He should just move into a box under the overpass. He's already got the look.

Nobody:
The crusty hobo out at the bus stop at 3am:

 

[underoo underarmour]

Well atleast his shit will be goth as fuck doodt

He would absolutely brag about his goth poop and then also brag about suddenly being super pale. Not because of the massive internal blood loss, but because his skin and poop finally caught up with his level of goth. That's what's up... Except his hematocrit and red blood cells. Those of course would be way down.

 

[gettingthatgrooveback]

Random question: does Cobra not like ketchup?

Come to think of it, I don't remember watching him use ketchup in any of his food hacks or dank recipes. He ordered a baconator with no ketchup in his latest food hack as well.

 

[ibeatmywife]

Random question: does Cobra not like ketchup?

Come to think of it, I don't remember watching him use ketchup in any of his food hacks or dank recipes. He ordered a baconator with no ketchup in his latest food hack as well.

Yea he isn't a fan of it he prefers bbq and ranch. I'm pretty sure he will still eat a burger if they happen to put it on tho just will complain

 

[O Puffers Where Art Thou?]

This is the worst. Cobes needs to quit it with the booze but he doesn't even see that as a path; he has fuck-all going on for himself and he's content to interpret the poisoning as good faith from people who want him to be happy. This is kind of distressing.

When I try to imagine what he does with himself all day I just picture him drinking and staring at the wall.

 

[IsaacShraeder]

That or he removed them from the store to pretend he's selling them as hot items.

He definitely sold them. It's a testament to his lazyness that he just refuses to tap into what is essentially money for nothing.

 

[UncommonParlence]

ok so i feel like we need to talk about why cobes constantly leaves his food hacks to cool overnight.

is it purely for his teeth? like its so painful he goes as long as he can between eating. then throws everything he can at it cause hes hungry as fuck. then cools it down because cool, room temperature, or piping hot it will make his teeth hurt either way?

Alcoholics often refuse to eat when drinking as it soaks up liquor and makes them less drunk. He starts off hungry but by the time he finishes cooking he's drunk and doesn't want food to fuck up his high.

 

[biggacracka]

NAL is also wearing clothing for up to 5 days now.

I'm more surprised by the fact that she's wearing clothes at all than how lonv she's been wearing them

 

[Star Spangled Bogger]

Pancreatitis, tooth infections, and diabetes coming in nicely t00bz.
In all seriousness I'm shocked that his pancreas hasn't had any problems. That shit hurts, and I've known many alchies that died from it.

People can develop type 2 diabetes from alcohol abuse alone, even without sugar mead and taco slop energy drink diets.

He never talks about going to the doctor or being on any medication. One day he will likely suddenly fall off a cliff and get very sick. I think Clint is just waiting for him to die, unless Clint is a complete idiot the signs are obvious. Looking back at videos 4 years old, if he’s still walking and talking in 2030 I would be surprised. It’ll be the trolls fault of course.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

He never talks about going to the doctor or being on any medication. One day he will likely suddenly fall off a cliff and get very sick. I think Clint is just waiting for him to die, unless Clint is a complete idiot the signs are obvious. Looking back at videos 4 years old, if he’s still walking and talking in 2030 I would be surprised. It’ll be the trolls fault of course.

I don't think Clint is just waiting for him to die. I think after 25 years straight of Josh rejecting all help he has basically just accepted he is going to do what he wants to do. No one can make Josh take medication or see a doctor. Clint can't force him to.

 

[Quandale Octavius Dingle]

When I try to imagine what he does with himself all day I just picture him drinking and staring at the wall.

Yeah pretty much what's going in your PFP. Either drinking in his corner, watching pirated cartoons, or spending all day foodhacking toobz.

 

[Fortyone]

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The slanted roof makes his trailer look 100x trashier

 

[8mm Cunningham]

Cobra doesn't eat because he drinks his dinner waiting for his food to cook. A lot of drunks do this.
What I don't understand is why he won't go live. Is Josh afraid Jessica is going to get him kicked out of his new place? I'm sure Clint laid down the law after the move (again).

 

[Jobama]

The worst thing about boglim isn't that he's an obnoxious a-log or that he is arguably stealing Josh's content but that he's now either so impatient or so view hungry that he's started to upload Josh's cooking videos in two parts instead of waiting for him to finish them to upload the whole thing.

 

[bonified retard]

Cobra doesn't eat because he drinks his dinner waiting for his food to cook. A lot of drunks do this.
What I don't understand is why he won't go live. Is Josh afraid Jessica is going to get him kicked out of his new place? I'm sure Clint laid down the law after the move (again).

He doesn't eat right away because his teeth are rotting out of his skull. He mentioned not being able to afford booze in both steak videos, and still let it "cool down" in the fridge.

And he probably isn't streaming because he still hasn't figured out how to set up 2FA on his new phone. He has this same issue everytime he breaks one. Clint does not give a fuck about when he streams, that's reddit fanfic.

 

[Mushroom King]

Only the true boglim can pull it from it's stone.

Cobra doesn't eat because he drinks his dinner waiting for his food to cook. A lot of drunks do this.
What I don't understand is why he won't go live. Is Josh afraid Jessica is going to get him kicked out of his new place? I'm sure Clint laid down the law after the move (again).

Cobra is gaining weight because his liver is unable to process the alcohol he is drinking. The liver instead creates or dispenses something called ascetic fluid. This fluid fills a person's abdomen as it grows, anyone with a round belly that pokes out with fat hanging off of it is likely not simply fat, but also an alcoholic. One of the side effects of drinking every day, all day, is that the ascetic fluid in the abdomen depress organs including the stomach and lungs, making you feel 'full' and unable to take deep breaths. He doesn't eat much because the ascetic fluid in his abdomen is making his stomach feel small or bloated and making bouts of hunger more bipolar. If he hasn't drank for 2 days, he will get ravenously hungry. If he keeps drinking, he will be less and less hungry until he routinely goes 3-14 days without eating food, just drinking. Also, I'm not disagreeing, I'm hopefully just explaining why alcoholics do what they do.



Obviously the ascites sufferer on the left is far beyond Josh, but it explains the weight gain, gourd head and swollen face.

t. recovering alcoholic

EDIT

His arms and legs will begin to get more and more skinny and he will try to hide it, watch his forearms and his calves. This sounds schizo, but you will see.

 

[ResignedCustodes]

Those Snake Bones intros always look like they'd be a comfy 16 bit masterpiece

I honestly wonder how he'd react if a few people got together and whipped something up in RPGMaker or some shit. Hopefully as a tribute but he might put it down to trolls.

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Vocalising the negative intrusive thoughts won't help, better not get some therapy BOY! (Yeah, I know. Never ever)

 

[Slim Boglim]

I honestly wonder how he'd react if a few people got together and whipped something up in RPGMaker or some shit. Hopefully as a tribute but he might put it down to trolls.

Vocalising the negative intrusive thoughts won't help, better not get some therapy BOY! (Yeah, I know. Never ever)

there has been multiple instances of people trying to make cobra games. I think there’s only a handful successful. One was a pretty funny rpg

Edit: The rpg was called “Girthbound” and the most I can find of it is the trailer the creator made I fear it might be lost media with the sub dead. Unfortunately there’s an inflation fetish rpg also called “Girthbound” that makes searching for it difficult.

Disregard that I suck cocks the link to mediafire to grab it is in the video description. It’s worth a play it’s really fun if you’re into that kind of thing. I won’t spoil it but you can “ride bike” in the overworld and it’s incredible. Also the spells you use and party members you recruit 10/10 chef’s kiss