I'm not even sure there's a point in trying to chase a married future as I keep getting pangs to go off and join a Monastery.
The bottom line is, the "just go to church bruh" thing is a fucking meme. You won't find your waifu at church in your 20s-30s. The most you'll find are single mothers the pastors will pass onto you. You have to go where women are. If they aren't there, then it's not a good place. The reason you go to bars and clubs, etc. isn't to date or marry the women you meet there. (I mean you could, if you get lucky and somehow find a decent one but that's a hay in a needle stack)
No, the purpose is to flex your social muscles. It IS a muscle. You need to work it out. Women will smell desperation on you. It practically has an odor, if you aren't comfortable and relaxed, you come off as awkward. And I don't blame them for not wanting that.
I had the exact opposite experience. Everyone was always "too busy studying" and forgot I existed because we only saw each other for an hour a week max. Most people born after like, 1997 have never even been to a house party because they don't exist anymore. I had a classmate who went back to college at age 30 and he said the vibe was so different (I tried not to think about why he wanted to go to house parties with 19 year olds). Being born in Gen Z has been a social death sentence.
Why not go to house parties? Cheap booze. Hot women. Yeah, everyone's annoying. Yeah you're the old guy. But if you want to bone a 19 year old, that's where you go. A 19-21 year old is still an adult. 30 isn't THAT old. This whole stigma about thinking a guy is wrong for being 30 and having sex with an 18-21 year old is just a PsyOp and giving in to the whole "OMG SHE'S 25 SHES STILL A CHILD" bullshit. Women are a diminishing return, their looks don't last. The only difference is maturity, but that varies greatly and often is still just different flavors of the same bullshit. If I'm seeing an immature 30 year old woman, then there's simply no benefit to not dating a younger one. If you're an older man, you SHOULD be dating younger, prettier women. Maybe you don't have to go 18-21 but there's a reason women post 30 fall out of dating app algorithms. Bottom line is, don't fall for the PsyOp bait, get the prettiest woman you can, regardless of age. (As long as it's legal.)
Men are scared. They are ostracized if seen mingling with any females young enough to not be used up. Add alcohol to the mix and its a guaranteed disaster (for the male).
You have to learn not to buy into these games. If someone is going to shame you for dating/boning someone they consider "too young for you", they're not your friends and they can suck rocks. Date and spend time whomever you like.
You know what, that gives me a legitimate question. A cougar goes to hit on 19 year old boys, and succeeds- based and cougarpilled. An older guy tries to hit on 19 year old girls, and succeeds- pedophile; creep; literally raping a minor, everyone around the minor, and even himself. Why is that?
They do this because women their age can't compete. They can't compete with younger women and they know it so they use shaming tactics and narratives to keep younger women from stealing "their men". It's a survival mechanism for older women to help even their odds. Doctor Chad can't be dumping them for the cute 20 year old intern. Now they used social media to do this en masse. If a 30 year old marries a 20 year old, instant pedo by their standards.
If you think I'm lying or full of shit, talk to married women. Most don't have this opinion. They literally drop it once a ring goes on their finger. Nobody seethes more about Leonardo DiCaprio than wrinkly old bitches. The only thing that can be done to counter this to teach other men to not fall for the shaming tactics.
Don't want to be a killjoy, but tons of anti-social youths abstain (nearly religiously) from alcohol too. It's risk aversion, pure and simple, but the inability to have fun often actually damages both their dating and career prospects. Seeing a twenty-something mouth off to their boss about the dangers of alcohol is rarely well-received at a company party, and I doubt it's better for dating or other social circles. Cases like that were usually solved with a stack of benjamins and pub crawl ending at a strip club 10 years ago, but your nephew would probably just get pissy and leave. You can't fix that.
He is risk averse, but he does need to get out. I wasn't a social butterfly or night owl either but you either learn, or spend your life playing Elden Ring to the heat death of the universe.
Honestly, you are an amazing uncle for trying to bring him out of his comfort zone. NEETS are created by a life time of risk aversion. I would be guessing that his parents were on the over protective side. He probably won't except it the first time but keep that door open for him. One day he'll realise that he's letting life pass him by.
I don't know why his parents don't put their foot down and get him into an education course or something. He'd be perfect for trade school.
It's actually the opposite. His parents weren't overprotective, him and his sister were just raised by the internet. What I want more is for him to have a good time that's not connected to the fucking screen.
' and more of a 'I am currently single and here's why, but I don't really think that's going to change.' The bottom line is I just don't feel comfortable going to bars because all I'll do is get drunk, and I see that as a complete waste of time if I'm making the effort to actually leave the house in the first place.
