Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Spongebuck Breakerpants]

I can’t believe he has the fucking the nerve to say that when he’s taking a plea deal because he has no case. I wish the prosecution would see this, retract the deal, and send that motherfucker to prison

As per the idea behind offering a plea, I think that Balldo probably plans and/or threatened to bring a storm of frivolous and ridiculous motions for the state to have to respond to, should this go to trial. The outcome is guilty, trial or no trial, it's just a matter of how much work the state wants to put in. IIRC, it's worth noting that one or two of Balldo's requests were not necessarily shot down, but just restricted until after the trial begins.

 

[Captain Manning]

To be super fair to the dude you're responding to, this outlined process violates several Human-Computer Interaction principles.

I heard @Null explain that the ui interaction is hampered by limitations of the underlying framework, so for now it serves principally as some kind of technical shibboleth.

In plainer English, he has asked Xenoforo to make thumbnails the default when inserting images (which would be ideal, and solve a major headache), but Xenoforo devs have refused to implement that change.

So, for the foreseeable future, you have to follow the procedure Himedall outlined or the slubbermutt, or one of his minions, will yell at you.

That means he was 100% confident that he would walk into that room, his lawyer would state the demands Nick was making in terms of altering the deal, and the response would be "Of course, Mr. Rekieta, sir. You're the best legal mind to ever grace this county. We're honored to accept your terms."

That's exactly what he thought.

Nick is Dunning-Kruger personified.

You even see it in his snarky Local's comment today, where he claims he had to explain things to the Prosecutor.

I haven't really looked into the Prosecutor, but I'm gonna take a wild ass guess she has way more legal experience than Nick. His ego is writing checks his legal ability can't cash.

 

[HackerX]

As per the idea behind offering a plea, I think that Balldo probably plans and/or threatened to bring a storm of frivolous and ridiculous motions for the state to have to respond to, should this go to trial. The outcome is guilty, trial or no trial, it's just a matter of how much work the state wants to put in. IIRC, it's worth noting that one or two of Balldo's requests were not necessarily shot down, but just restricted until after the trial begins.

Mr. Cokehead's big issue is he's forced prosection in a position to have already done a lot of the legwork. The only leverage he has for plea negotiations is the fact he's (seemingly) willing to take a plea deal. He's unintentionally incentivized them to go to trial if the prosecution thinks they slam dunk. 'Percentage of cases' won and 'thrown x number of drug users in jail' are the kinds of things prosecutors brag about for promotions and elections.

 

[AnOminous]

Much as Nick being smacked down hard is an appealing proposition, he's the sole bread winner for the family and Kayla isn't

Breadwinner my ass. He's completely useless. It's his parents who are supporting pretty much everything at this point, including his defense.

You've even see it in his snarky Local's comment today, where he claims he had to explain things to the Prosecutor.

I imagine that went over about as well as when he explained things to SEEEEEAN SEEEEEEAN SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAN and the other practicing lawyers.

 

[Fapcop]

Much as Nick being smacked down hard is an appealing proposition, he's the sole bread winner for the family and Kayla isn't capable of providing for the children either financially or practically. Nick's ego would take a bruising but the children would be subjected to even more instability.

lol, what gave you the idea that Nick is the “breadwinner”?!

While the exact mechanics are unknown, it’s obvious that it’s the trustfund that is the “bread winner”.

It’s really rather simple math: Nick never had a thriving law practice. His legal career before he started streaming (and mind you, for a long time he only earned chump change on streaming) consisted of drafting a few contracts. More of a part time job or a hobby.

There’s just no way he could support a family of five, unless he sold drugs or something and had a law office as a front.

Their main income before the YouTube bucks, and now presumably as he hasn’t streamed consistently in close to six months, is the trust fund. Period.

 

[Captain Manning]

It’s really rather simple math: Nick never had a thriving law practice. His legal career before he started streaming (and mind you, for a long time he only earned chump change on streaming) consisted of drafting a few contracts. More of a part time job or a hobby.

That is not true. He's had actual criminal defense cases. There are 32 records in MCRO with him as the attorney of record. The oldest record dates to 2015. The most recent being April's speeding ticket from January (which is a farce). And the one before that (which might actually count) is a case from 2021.



The thing is, they are are almost all low end criminal matters, and he's never taken a single one to victory in front of a jury.

This has been discussed at some length in this thread in the past.

Bottom line is he has some criminal law experience, but not what I would call a lot. Nor did he probably make a lot of money from it. I am pretty sure @Potentially Criminal puts him to shame. Which is why the only thing Nick has to fling at Sean is lame sandwich jokes. Certainly nothing from his oh-so-sharp legal mind.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

To be super fair to the dude you're responding to, this outlined process violates several Human-Computer Interaction principles.

I heard @Null explain that the ui interaction is hampered by limitations of the underlying framework, so for now it serves principally as some kind of technical shibboleth.

Yes, until Joshy re-codes the whole forum code (in Rust, perhaps? lol!), we mortals shall have to suffer... As a hybrid PC-user and phonefag myself, I appreciate the QOL improvement from thumbnail sizing, so I advocate where I can to those who are exclusively mobile browser users.

What leverage is Nick supposed to have in these negotiations?

This is what makes what happened this week funny. He was laying the groundwork on social media for weeks that he intended to take a deal. That means he was 100% confident that he would walk into that room, his lawyer would state the demands Nick was making in terms of altering the deal, and the response would be "Of course, Mr. Rekieta, sir. You're the best legal mind to ever grace this county. We're honored to accept your terms."

What demands did he make? Who knows. What seems clear is that he must have went in expecting a deal and no deal was reached.


Imagine how full the sink would be if he didn't!

Delusion? Do you recall his aspirational plans for his re-negotiation with RUMBLE? After faffing about for a year doing degeneracy 'relationship' content when they had hired a LAW streamer, he suddenly developed this big ideas for new features for RUMBLE to add to the platform... It is a TOTAL SURPRISE that they were uninterested in his genius musings...

As per the idea behind offering a plea, I think that Balldo probably plans and/or threatened to bring a storm of frivolous and ridiculous motions for the state to have to respond to, should this go to trial. The outcome is guilty, trial or no trial, it's just a matter of how much work the state wants to put in. IIRC, it's worth noting that one or two of Balldo's requests were not necessarily shot down, but just restricted until after the trial begins.

This sounds like something Nick would do. 'Give me what I want, or I will scream, shit my pants, and embarrass everyone here!', sounds like a tack Nicholas never outgrew...

 

[Fapcop]

That is not true. He's had actual criminal defense cases. There are 32 records in MCRO with him as the attorney of record. The oldest record dates to 2015. The most recent being April's speeding ticket from January (which is a farce). And the one before that (which might actually count) is a case from 2021.

View attachment 6702528

The thing is, they are are almost all low end criminal matters, and he's never taken a single one to victory in front of a jury.

This has been discussed at some length in this thread in the past.

Bottom line is he has some criminal law experience, but not what I would call a lot. Nor did he probably make a lot of money from it. I am pretty sure @Potentially Criminal puts him to shame. Which is why the only thing Nick has to fling at Sean is lame sandwich jokes. Certainly nothing from his oh-so-sharp legal mind.

I mean sure… 32 criminal cases. My point still stands though. There’s no fucking way that paid for a family of five.

 

[Captain Manning]

I mean sure… 32 criminal cases. My point still stands though. There’s no fucking way that paid for a family of five.

I don't think they were all criminal, and I don't dispute he probably didn't make a lot of money from it (in fact, I have argued before he didn't). It's generally agreed Nick didn't begin making real good money until around 2019 with the Vic Mignogna coverage, and that he probably had a lot of help from his rich family before then (and likely again, right now, considering he's not streaming).

However, I do have to correct you when you say he only drafted contracts. The official record demonstrates otherwise.

EDIT: Typo.

 

[God's strongest milkman]

Nick, if you ever read this I want you to know that you can't unsuck cock and untaste cum. That will seep into who you are at the most primal levels, it will stick with you even through death.

When the bleached bones of your skeleton are unwashed in a great flood after decades, when no one knows your name. They will be the bones of a gay cumslut.

 

[Trianon]

I love how he says his daughter wasn't exposed to the cocaine till the day of the raid by the officers.

She saw her dad was about to go to jail and started hoovering the bad stuff up her nostrils to make it go away. You see, this is all a case of bad timing.

 

[Melty Butter]

I haven't really looked into the Prosecutor, but I'm gonna take a wild ass guess she has way more legal experience than Nick. His ego is writing checks his legal ability can't cash.

I'll give a shout-out to Kristen Pierce. Based on her LinkedIn: Deans List at her law school for 6 semesters, clerked for a judge in the 7th Circuit, public defender for 10 months, private practice for 1 year, Assistant DA for 10 years.

Google says the average ADA in the US prosecutes 150 felonies and 400 misdemeanors/yr. Cutting that in half for the Kandiyohi County factor and being very conservative, that would mean she's prosecuted around 750 felonies and 2000 misdemeanors total.

Obviously, that's ridiculously rough math but it's safe to say that she can run circles around Nicholas Rekieta.

 

[TurdThrower]

Jesus, Aaron is a moron. Does he not remember that his good friends Geno and Keanu recently grassed him up for sharing revenge porn with Geno? How fucking stupid can you be to allow this pair of snakes back in your life again? As soon as he does something that they can trade for views, they'll sell him out again in an instant.

At some point, you have to say 'this cunt is so retarded, he deserves everything he gets'.

I almost want him to go down as hard as I want to see Nick face justice due to the sheer stupidity of this. I'm not saying that you can't forgive people, but he went beyond it and has forgotten what they did to him. This guy is willingly retarded and like you said, deserves every thing that he gets.

Agreed. I usually err on the side of being kind(ish) to Aaron, but this is just fucking stupid on his part.

This is where I've been. Since he's the least shitty of the qover and has deranged alogs I've actively wanted him to be in the clear for the seethe we would get from not just Nick, but all of the other people involved. With him running back to these two, especially Keanu, the guy has shown that he is incapable of learning. Not only does he deserve what he gets, he needs to get what he deserves because nothing else will enlighten him.

This sound like a slightly more educated version of Ethan Ralph back when he was posting about the meal he had when he was doing that last episode with Dax and Vito.

 

[AltisticRight]

BALDO RICE! GOD IS REAL!

I was joking when I made the post about baldo rice.
For fuck's sake now my phone automatically "corrects" baldo to Balldo. If there's ever a smartphone input cloud leak, people can just search that word and megagigadox me.

Leave my contacts from Xi's office alone please.

More Nick kitchen horrors in LOCALS:

This freak really was using disposable paper plates potentially coated with microplastics and poisonous ink. Father of the year everybody.
That crockpot of slop looks like something Jack Scalfani just put out for his demented chilli November bullshit. It looks disgusting.
What's wrong with real plates? Can't he just use a dishwasher? Did the door break off and the technician died of arsehole cancer? I'd sodomise myself to death with a stick blender if I had to visit that dump to service electronics too.

Believe it or not (like if you're over the age of 1, disposable plates are far more expensive than even the best small batch ceramics made in England. Two sets of kitchenware from a good quality Chinese brand would cost no more than $150, or $30 from IKEA. A bad of disposable plates that won't even last a full week costs $2. Do the fucking numbers you retarded skeleton. This could be a question in your daughter's mathematics exam.

Is there another lolcow Nick hasn't skinwalked yet?

Lucas Roberts.
Hopefully soon.

 

[I Will Be Us]

Kayla isn't capable of providing for the children either financially or practically.

Where are you getting this idea?

She has an early education degree and could get a job as a teacher. At the very least, she has two hands that are capable of delivering fries at the drive-thru window like millions of other Americans. Kayla's no damsel, nor is she special.

Plus as others have already said, there's the trust. I'd hope and expect that Nick's parents would be sufficiently embarrassed by their dipshit kid that to compensate, they'd throw her whatever is needed for their grandchildren.

Only a rehabilitated Nick is good for his kids. I should hope it doesn't take prison for him to have that come-to-Jesus moment. But, his sheer hubris, lack of remorse and complete idiocy point in that direction. I know prison is unlikely, but I'm increasingly thinking based on his words and behavior that it'd be optimal.

 

[HackerX]

I was joking when I made the post about baldo rice.
For fuck's sake now my phone automatically "corrects" baldo to Balldo. If there's ever a smartphone input cloud leak, people can just search that word and megagigadox me.

Leave my contacts from Xi's office alone please.

Someone familiar with data science could do wonders with that kind of leak. KF users would be hunted down by doing a frequency analysis of Balldo. If that word shows up twice, the target acquired is acquired.

Where are you getting this idea?

She has an early education degree and could get a job as a teacher. At the very least, she has two hands that are capable of delivering fries at the drive-thru window like millions of other Americans. Kayla's no damsel, nor is she special.

Capable and willing are 2 different things. She's an empty husk of a human, much less a mother.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

Again, it’s not rocket science.

(Yup, also not a lawyer.)

All of the individual factors in the search warrant affidavit may by themselves be dismissed as “no big deal” and not enough for a warrant.

(“Nick lost weight… He could be on OZEMPIC!” I shit you not.)

But if you add them together, they all indicate… Drug use! Which is why the judge approved it.

And of course Barnes and Viva don’t mention that all the legal attacks on the search warrant… Failed!

EDIT: NGL, I found this pretty hilarious.

Barnes claims, as a gotcha, the definite proof of the judge being biased!

Namely: The affidavit mentions swatting phone calls! WHICH WERE FALSE!!

“AN UNBIASED JUDGE WOULD HAVE NOTED THAT THE SWATTING CALLS WERE FALSE!”

He really is a retard, isn’t he? Did I just hit my head severely, or aren’t swattings BY DEFINITION false?!

Yes, the standard is "totality of the circumstances." The case in MN is Wiley, referencing Gates at the Supreme Court.

 

[Captain Manning]

Update from Montagraph:

Highlights:

- They are going to be moving into discovery
- Trial is tentatively set for December of 2025.
- Nick's local attorney (not Randazza, who did not attend the scheduling conference) pled ignorance as to Nick owing Monty $300, or that Nick is currently facing criminal charges (Monty is, understandably, incredulous as to both these pleas).
- Monty is confident of victory ("isn't that neat?")

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

KF users would be hunted down by doing a frequency analysis of Balldo. If that word shows up twice, the target acquired is acquired.

Nah, I know there are others who have looked up the Balldo. I like to tell it as a caution about product endorsements and a bonus lesson about degeneracy. The average person who I've sacrificed to the Balldo typically says to me "That guy really wore one? How much of a freak is he?" Those who share my taste in lolcows respond " Of course Nick wore it. That much blow he practically needs a power assist."

 

[VidMasterEon]

Update from Montagraph:

Highlights:

- They are going to be moving into discovery
- Trial is tentatively set for December of 2025.
- Nick's local attorney (not Randazza, who did not attend the scheduling conference) pled ignorance as to Nick owing Monty $300, or that Nick is currently facing criminal charges (Monty is, understandably, incredulous as to both these pleas).
- Monty is confident of victory ("isn't that neat?")

What do you think montegraph could ask for in discovery?
I think twitter dm's and emails mentioning him.