Anna o' Brien / Glitter + Lazers / GlitterandLazers - Fat, drunk, consoomer attention whore who would rather eat and drink herself to death than endure a single negative emotion

[OttoWest]

This is every blonde guidette in suburban Long Island circa 1990.

While I was scouting for that JC Penney pic, I found this post from a little over a year ago:

I wonder how she compares now?

All I see is someone who is so uncomfortable in their own skin and trying to hide it with bright colours and a stupid Jojo smile (and hair bow).
She must absolutely hate her life when she’s at home alone. No wonder she’s been on a long bender.

The solution is and has always been within her reach. Call up her family, say “I need help” and check into an in-patient program tomorrow. For someone of Anna’s means it is that easy.

Yes it’s going to be work, yes she’d have to restrict and maintain for the rest of her life, but it can be done. People larger than Anna have done it. But Anna as always is the biggest obstacle to her own wellness.

 

[Angry New Ager]

She didn't just hit the wall, she Hulk-Smashed it.

I think of the Kool-Aid man bashing through a wall, just in an infinitely more noxious flavor and color.

 

[thejackal2]

 

[Scrumption]

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Why does she think people want to hear the inane ramblings of an unintellectual fat ass? Seriously, she treats Threads how people treated Twitter in 2011.

 

[behavioral swamp thang]

You can tell her parents let her suck on a pacifier until age 8. She's got the damage where the front teeth go inward and the molars don't.

 

[Ash's_Chainsaw_Hand]

I'll add in that those buttons that are fighting for dear life and performing their duties admirably... the fabric is gapping. A lot. That shit dun fit at all.

Also love how when she's seated it bunches so fucking much because her gunt is cramming her sweater up under her sad floop titties.

Her shitty collections goes to a 5x- but our gorl doesn't wear THAT!!!

 

[thejackal2]

You can tell her parents let her suck on a pacifier until age 8. She's got the damage where the front teeth go inward and the molars don't.

You know that middle aged person at the office that always has the absolute worth breath? That has to be Anna. Her dental hygiene is non existent she has visible tarter built up around the entire front of her incisors. The few times she's talked about dental care it's "I'm deathly afraid".

 

[The Judean People's Front]

People larger than Anna have done it

All the deathfats are such all-or-nothing thinkers, I wonder why more of them don't go the route of that guy who checked himself into an inpatient facility and only drank water/took vitamins for a year - Angus Barbieri (I just read he also ate yeast extract and drank coffee, but the point stands)

The few times she's talked about dental care it's "I'm deathly afraid".

She is deathly afraid - of the dental chair completely collapsing under her mid-procedure. Or just completely keeling over backwards when they lean her back. Or starting a small fire when the chair motor tries to raise the seatback.

 

[Clotso Coof]

that guy who checked himself into an inpatient facility and only drank water/took vitamins for a year - Angus Barbieri

He wasn't inpatient. He was in his home living an otherwise normal life. At his doctor's request, he came in frequently for check ups to make sure he wasn't in danger. (The wikipedia article is worded poorly. He spent a couple weeks in a hospital to be studied and that's about it).

Angus Barbieri simply decided not to eat until he was thin and then did it. There was a fat black guy on youtube who fasted off 200 lbs a few years back, but I don't remember his name. It's doable, but it takes the level of iron will you won't find in 999/1000 deathfats.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

She didn't just hit the wall, she Hulk-Smashed it.

Honestly.. has she ever been pre-wall?

 

[Scrumption]

You can tell her parents let her suck on a pacifier until age 8. She's got the damage where the front teeth go inward and the molars don't.

The term you are looking for is “binky teeth”

 

[thejackal2]

Honestly.. has she ever been pre-wall?

This is a good question. I see a lot of redditors talking about what a joy and authentic inspiration she was when she was in NYC and personally I never really say it. I saw a woman of low intellectual curiosity, average organizational ability, a condescending demeanor and an overbearing personality clearly an act to cover up crippling insecurity.

That said, there are moments of an actual joy in those NYC era videos, which you never see now.

 

[Barbarella]

Joy is a word Anna likes. “If I don’t bring you joy, find somebody who will. Buy these sweaters, they will bring holiday joy.” Blah blah, she says it too often to be meaningful.

I'm not sure she’s ever felt true joy. It’s a fleeting experience. Being a kid, riding your bike fast on a sunny day, wind in your hair…that’s joyful. Going to a concert and hearing that one song that has touched you for years. Seeing the face of your husband as you walk down the aisle or seeing your babies learn and grow-true joy. Mastering something might bring joy.

It doesn’t have to be those exact things obviously, but real joy means you transcend who you are and are just about the feeling. Has Anna ever had that?

Nobody online brings me joy, not even you fuckers. You make me laugh and feel entertained, but joy? Watching TV doesn’t. Eating food doesn’t Maybe lying on the deck of a boat and taking in the sun and waves and just being in that peaceful moment would do it, but not when you are worried about your fat in a bikini, have a camera pointed at you, have to think about takes, angles, if you fit on the toilet.

Has Anna ever had moments of true joy? Maybe as a kid. As an adult? I kinda doubt it since she misuses the word so often. Even eating her favorite things has to come with guilt.

 

[thejackal2]

Joy is a word Anna likes. “If I don’t bring you joy, find somebody who will. Buy these sweaters, they will bring holiday joy.” Blah blah, she says it too often to be meaningful.

I'm not sure she’s ever felt true joy. It’s a fleeting experience. Being a kid, riding your bike fast on a sunny day, wind in your hair…that’s joyful. Going to a concert and hearing that one song that has touched you for years. Seeing the face of your husband as you walk down the aisle or seeing your babies learn and grow-true joy. Mastering something might bring joy.

It doesn’t have to be those exact things obviously, but real joy means you transcend who you are and are just about the feeling. Has Anna ever had that?

Nobody online brings me joy, not even you fuckers. You make me laugh and feel entertained, but joy? Watching TV doesn’t. Eating food doesn’t Maybe lying on the deck of a boat and taking in the sun and waves and just being in that peaceful moment would do it, but not when you are worried about your fat in a bikini, have a camera pointed at you, have to think about takes, angles, if you fit on the toilet.

Has Anna ever had moments of true joy? Maybe as a kid. As an adult? I kinda doubt it since she misuses the word so often. Even eating her favorite things has to come with guilt.

It's like Don Draper put so eloquently on Mad Men: what's a moment of joy/happiness really? It's a moment before you need more joy/happiness. As a child, as you said, those moments can come every day, sometimes almost every moment, as for most lucky kids you're cared for well, you've got no responsibilities, and everything is fresh and new.

But as an adult? When even people that are doing well financially have a dozen different requirements every day between when they wake up and put their feet up with a cold drink after work? It's fucking hard. "Joy" isn't something you want to rely on as a barometer for your well being. I'd say something more like "satisfaction" or "pride" is much more sustainable. Have pride in your household, your work, get satisfaction out of a job well done or a family milestone.

Of course influencers want to sell us joy in youtube shorts and tik toks and IG stories. Because joy is their product. They are joy. Their products are joy producers. But it's fake! Of course it's fake. David Foster Wallace talks a little bit about this with TV sitcoms in his essays on TV. It requires a suspension of belief that we as the audience want to partake in. Ultimately it's a complete dead end, but even self aware people will fall into it. The bovine herds that make up most Americans? They never stood a chance.

 

[._.]

I sat there spending so many seconds trying to figure out how that could have happened and this had to be it. I bet she didn't cough, either, but choked because she just couldn't stop pressing the nozzle for more.
I triple or quadruple that it was Tracey, because Anna whined about the ex-friend only wanting things from her, or taking, or something like that. So the thing might have been the Swift concert, which means that poor kid didn't get to go when Anna fatted out.
I guess we'll know soon enough if she posts pics of Tracey and the girl enjoying themselves, because that's what a real friend would do, lol, hahaha.

I havent seen the tweet but reading the thread I could imagine Tracey making sense. You could imagine a scenario where if she does have tickets for all of them, she goes to visit for Thanksgiving, and is fatting around, parading her kids on the internet and being obnoxious. Tracey can put up with that but maybe makes a comment like 'hey I agree with the rest of the world, can you please not film and monetize my kids for your internet thing' and Anna getting offended, starting a fight or being passive aggressive, pulling out and taking the tickets with her. Then making a passive aggressive tweet about how strong she is for fighting and making excuses.

Its nice to think she was lying about the tickets, or only had the one, or didnt lead the others on, but the idea of her impulsively buying tickets (maybe as a gift or not), inviting other people (maybe for company, Im not sure she wouldnt be embarrassed to go to to a concert alone especially being the old single fat girl when everyone else is young and in touch), and then holding said 'gift' over peoples head, and being a bitch--thats more in line with the personality you can glean of her from her media presence.

 

[thejackal2]

look at the guy in the back nope the fuck out.

 

[Barbarella]

Her fupa balls are coming in nicely.

What is that supposed to even mean? We see a fat fuck struggling to run 7 steps with her giant legs then stop to use an inhaler. I thought these ”what really happens” things were supposed to show a perfect moment, then something that shows it’s not perfect.

This is exactly what I’d expect was going on with Anna.

What’s next, is she going to surprise us by showing that after that arduous run, she ate a couple of burgers with a milkshake and then slept 4 hours?

Lunatic.

 

[Clotso Coof]

I thought these ”what really happens” things were supposed to show a perfect moment, then something that shows it’s not perfect.

"You all think I'm so athletic and perfect, but I actually struggle! Tee-hee! I'm so quirky honest!" She's batshit crazy.

 

[Jizzrag]

Holy shit that «running» segment is sped up. How is she not embarrassed posting these? She still always has a foot on the ground, so she’s not running.

 

[MongInTheMirror]

look at the guy in the back nope the fuck out.
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Ah yes, Anna, thank goodness you included the footage of yourself with the inhaler. Without that, we would all surely find ourselves stuck thinking this was the deportment of an effortless athlete:



"She is beauty, she is grace..."