How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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Woke up to an empty spot in the bed, get up and find my husband sleeping on the couch looking feverish.
It looks like he broke his fever this morning but he looks terrible.

Went to work, watched my boss take the last few decorative things from his office. He's retiring officially in about two weeks and just moving things out slowly.

Tbh I didn't think it'd make me emotional, but it did. He hired me after I tried getting my current spot with three other people.
It jump started my career and I couldn't be any more thankful.

I'm so sad to see him go, he's been so good to me and my colleagues. I do have a new place to go, with another older boss who's definitely leaving the company in a few years.
I hope after my stint there I can find someone who'll be here a little longer, so I don't have to move again so soon.

Oh and this popped up this morning. I found it really funny:
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No, he's really nice.

Crisis being one of my friends' marriage falling apart and because I'm friends with both parties involved, I have no fucking idea how to approach this whatsoever
Carefully!

I'd probably say to both of them that you don't want to be involved or stuck in the middle. That you need to sit this one out until the dust settles.
 
Carefully!

I'd probably say to both of them that you don't want to be involved or stuck in the middle. That you need to sit this one out until the dust settles.
I wish I could, unfortunately I've already decided to have a conversation with both of them separately, because I don't know how to say "wow that sounds like a you problem and y'all need outside help"
 
This holiday season's been a mixed bag for me- on one hand, I had a little bit of a W in that I graduated and finally finished the very last bit of schooling I need to qualify for a very prestigious professional license. Now granted I have to complete my profession's equivalent of a residency for a few years before I can take the necessary and overly expensive exams for my license, but I'm lucky to already be employed in my field and my bosses are discussing the possibility of a promotion with a "substantial compensation increase"- alongside help with the residency requirements.

On the other hand- there's some family drama going on right now and it's at the point I'm getting inclined to put some serious space between me and certain people. I spent my entire childhood growing up around addicts... Josh said awhile ago on stream that "when someone's an addict- lying just becomes their second tongue" and this is becoming painfully evident with someone I'm related to. They haven't made a single good decision in years and they've done something ungodly stupid recently that has a very high likelihood of making them homeless. I'm literally multiple thousands of miles away from any family other than my spouse so even if I wanted to I can't swoop in and save the day- which I don't even have the capability to do due to many different kinds of limitations. It's just been very sad to watch- and honestly it hurts but the people who are in trouble did this to themselves through YEARS of bad decisions, addictions, lies, and bullshit.
 
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Feeling very autismal. Writing a Christmas card to my uncle and his new girlfriend and I'm not 1000% sure of her name, I've been over and met her several times she's a lovely woman now i'm stuck, dunno whats worse to leave her name off the card or to take a shot with my best guess. Cards been on my desk half finished for an hour now while I struggle.
"Hi, folks!"

2020 just really fucking killed the way Americans interact with eachother in a way that can't really be downplayed. It really is a different world now. I've seen things very slowly changing the last year but we still have a long way to go before shit's normal again.
I think it was covid (meaning the isolation and changes in expectations, not effects of getting the virus, for most people) that fucked people.

...

I've had a terrible day, and I'm still disgruntled. Was supposed to have a full day of PTO and got none of it. Worked almost 12 hours, all high-intensity and incredibly frustrating. And having to do that meant that personal things (TIME WITH MY KID) had to get put off. Meanwhile virtually no one was even around.

It's been 3 hours since I finished up, and I'm still mad.

I'll expect that tomorrow will be better, I'll stop feeling grinchy, and I'll pull off Christmas after all. Have a Christmas party tomorrow night I have mixed feelings about, so I'll take some time tomorrow to collect myself and game face it.
 
I'll expect that tomorrow will be better, I'll stop feeling grinchy, and I'll pull off Christmas after all. Have a Christmas party tomorrow night I have mixed feelings about, so I'll take some time tomorrow to collect myself and game face it.
You will be better. You're a great person who's bounced back from all kinds of hell. It's just right now that's the problem.
Without going into another indulgent paragraph on myself, but it's something I struggle with. I got my friend and some others some really nice presents this year that I know will be nice to give them a couple days from now. That day is not now.
12 hours days kill you in ways that you don't really expect. What you regret most isn't the fatigue but the time lost.
But you'll do well, I promise. Even if not tomorrow, then the day after tomorrow. Or the day after that.
And yeah, I was mostly referring to the isolation and societal pressures from covid over the flu itself.
You're going to do great! I hope the christmas party goes well. I had the luxury of ditching my last christmas job party, so I can't talk. So I hope yours isn't too dreary.
 
Building on that: Money is very unlikely to be a factor as to why you aren't surrounded by friends, hobbies and passions, and I think that's the scary part about "early" adult life. If you truly, truly wanted to get into piano or whatever, you could very likely gather the money and be set to practice for free with apps and youtube for the next 5 years. Archery? Join a club, relatively cheap, borrow gear until you can save up and buy your own, and oh boy is that grind gonna be worth it. A goal and a reward with functionality beyond "uhh guess there's a steam sale?". But it requires decisiveness and we lack it, already making so many decisions throughout the day on our phones. I read somewhere that decisions are the one thing that tire the human mind and it makes sense. When I'm at my parents', I'm not on my phone 24/7 and it genuinely makes me want to get up and do something.
I would say money is the main factor, because money means consistency, short commutes as well as a place to put things like a piano.

Without money, you don't have any hope in seeing people consistently enough to become friends or it won't particularly matter if you've hungout for a month before they moved away for work.
 
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