Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Gobermental Supervisor]

Nothing ever happens in Balldoland, its all faggots pretending to know things or that they are able to "explain so many things", but they "just cannot talk about it right now because of legal reasons".

Every single fucking time its the same thing.

I will believe that something new and interesting has happened when it becomes public, until then its just another made up thing that Nick won't or can't talk about.
Aaron has done the same faggy shit to drum up interest for his failing show.

 

[Neetorino]

This, or Kayla's finally had enough and is leaving with the kids...and Nick's parents are on her side.

This seems the most likely option to me. He's losing the house after all, no reason for her to stay with him anymore. "If we're going to move back with my parents, I'm just going to leave you here alone Nick."

 

[Poop Shoot]

April having the baby of a man who is tired of dealing with his children would certainly be a bold move.

I don’t think that’s what it is though, becoming a single mother will tank her chances of being “rescued” by another man.

 

[Third World Aristocrat]

Wil Herren appeared on one of Melton's friend's shows and detailed some things Rekieta told him, such as the story he loves to brag about—how Aaron has tasted his semen.

Disclaimer: content

I did not watch this show to know if more things were discussed. This clip was posted by Stallyn19 on Twitter.

EDIT: What I understood from this clip is that Rekieta and Wil Herren are in each other's inboxes. Rekieta likes to brag about how other men have experimented his seed to any person he can. Mentally ill behavior.

 

[PinKopyKat]

Nothing ever happens in Balldoland, its all faggots pretending to know things or that they are able to "explain so many things", but they "just cannot talk about it right now because of legal reasons".

Every single fucking time its the same thing.

I will believe that something new and interesting has happened when it becomes public, until then its just another made up thing that Nick won't or can't talk about.
Aaron has done the same faggy shit to drum up interest for his failing show.

It is safe to assume that the most gay and retarded answer is the correct one.
Balldo's razor.

 

[Chug Smuckle]

AIDS?

 

[Harm]

Wil Herren appeared on one of Melton's friend's shows and detailed some things Rekieta told him, such as the story he loves to brag about—how Aaron has tasted his semen.

Disclaimer: View attachment 6823347 content
View attachment 6823329

I did not watch this show to know if more things were discussed. This clip was posted by Stallyn19 on Twitter.

God bless whoever suffers through these garbage broadcasts for these clips. Between the idiots talking over one another, the blurting out "yeah... yeah... yeah..." for no fucking reason, and then the stupid "CLIP IT! CLIP IT, CLIPPERS!" shit, I don't know how anyone tolerates this bullshit.

It's more like a bunch of losers in a Discord call rather than a show people are supposed to watch.

Anyways, Aaron is so one-dimensional that his response could be generated via AI at this point. "GUYS! C'mon guys! I know you want every crazy story and theory you hear to be true because you want it to be more interesting than it really is! But I've been THE most honest person about all this, and what can I tell ya? *sucks teeth* This didn't happen! Look, sorry Kiwifags, I don't know what to tell ya! Anything that you find out is coming from that crackhead's mouth should probably be taken with at least a liiiitle grain of salt! Anyways folks, we're only $637 dollars away from a five minute overtime, so let's makes sure we smash that goal so we can get a bright start on the week here!"

 

[ChromaQuack]

He's going to need one of these where we can just put all of the dates on there at once.

View attachment 6823326

Just write 'Anime Sucks cope and sneed for $5' on every space.

 

[parsnip]

I think it's probably nothing. He's just a retard that wants attention but he's too chicken shit to stream so this is how he gets it now. Look at what he did when he had Aaron's browser history. He's not shy about talking when he thinks he has something worth talking about.

 

[Bowl of Ramen]

April having the baby of a man who is tired of dealing with his children would certainly be a bold move.

I don’t think that’s what it is though, becoming a single mother will tank her chances of being “rescued” by another man.

I’m inclined to agree with you. April doesn’t seem like the type to baby trap a guy; she likes the families she ruins to be prefab. Kids sure, but not hers, so there’s still an out.

There’s still some desperate Z list e-celeb looking to get his dick wet I’m sure, and April can monkey branch to him.

Maybe Destiny can rehome her.

 

[Clayton cadidlehopper]

I think it's probably nothing. He's just a retard that wants attention but he's too chicken shit to stream so this is how he gets it now. Look at what he did when he had Aaron's browser history. He's not shy about talking when he thinks he has something worth talking about.

100% agree

He's trying to own the farms and thinks everyone will dig for dirt and speculate and then can expose us all!

He's got a bottle in one hand and the badlo in the other and is laughing at his hilarious self for his attempt at owning the farms.

One of his 3822375-D chess moves. Does he not know we don't go looking for corn...the corn will reveal itself in time and then we will harvest?

 

[Melty Butter]

nick isnt particularly funny, interesting, well educated, intelligent, or experienced

Let's take it one by one considering you compared Nick to other LawTubers.

Funny? Who in LawTube is as funny as Nick? Emily, Nate, and TheLeadAttorney... maybe. They certainly have Nick's charisma but I'd argue Nick - in better days - was a natural at comedic quips vs. the others. LawyerYouKnow is very charismatic but he's not funny.

Interesting? They're all painfully bland. Emily is a mom in Kentucky married to an orthodontist. Floridian LawyerYouKnow plays golf. Not-really-Texas-Kurt is a lonely incel. Cleveland Sean might get married again. NJ Joe's an ortho Jew, Viva is a dissident Canadian. These are not "interesting" people. Nate's parents were crackheads so he takes this prize but he hardly ever talks about his backstory.

Well educated? They all have law degrees from mostly middling law schools. All, except Nate and Dani (and Sean?), seem to come from upper-middle class homes. Not a lot of difference.

Intelligent? We don't have IQ tests, right? Kurt would probably score best yet he's the most retarded with one of the least viewed channels, so...

Experienced? You got me there. I think Barnes and Emily get the prize on that one. Both have over 15+ practice years and Sean will be close soon if he doesn't quit his day job. Nick is among the least experienced.

enough to outperform all the other law channels

No one's arguing "outperform" are they? Certainly not me. LawyerYouKnow, LeadAttorney, NateTheLawyer, and Emily regularly have over 2000+ live viewers and 4x that number for a hot case (see Karen Read). Nick's not getting that any time soon.

Let's define terms. "Medium successful" (my words) would be to 1) Stop the losses on YT & Locals subscriptions and slowly increase after that. 2) 500-1000 live viewers and solid re-watch. 3) Consistent streaming. Most LawTubers stream or release vids 3-4x/week. That's enough to get him to around a $50K income to sustain his (re-funded) home and a more modest lifestyle supported by the trust minus coke and his $300/week whiskey habit. (There are plenty of +/- variables including Locals, sponsors, and Superchats.)

Can he do it? Good question. He certainly has the capacity. For 3 years, before his descent and assuming substances haven't ruined his brain, he existed by mocking obscure lawsuits with wit and humor.

To be clear, I'll be in the front row cheering if he relapses, gets divorced raped, violates his parole, and loses his kids to the grandparents. Time will tell.

Like genuinely, what could Nick possibly stream about at this point in time?

He'll stream what everyone else is streaming with Branca. People forget that Branca was initially the only one consistently streaming with him for Depp/Heard and Nick still made bank. Most of the LawTubers were on Byte's channel. Emily beat them both by going solo.

Edit: Clarity

 

[Kipersonapiscesotter]

It's about someone else. Likely Aaron or in that category. The issue trying to figure Nick out is in him writing like a 13 year old girl who was shown attention for the first time.

 

[Strix454]

Wil Herren appeared on one of Melton's friend's shows and detailed some things Rekieta told him, such as the story he loves to brag about—how Aaron has tasted his semen.

Once again, Nick attempts an epic own by admitting how gay Nick is. Any story told by a guy involving the guy, other men and his semen makes the guy gay. Its an iron rule.

 

[Midnight Energy Drink]

Once again, Nick attempts an epic own by admitting how gay Nick is. Any story told by a guy involving the guy, other men and his semen makes the guy gay. Its an iron rule.

'The guy I slept in bed with is gay'

 

[Folgers Can]

If this is a response to something his audience was exposed to, we would see comments about it on his Locals posts.

Knowing his sycophants' usual spiel they wouldn't openly pry about the topic because it's a private matter that only karens care about even though it "doesn't affect them" etc., but there's at least some indication on Locals that news of the foreclosure "situation" has made its way to his wine aunt brigade too:

Whether he'd have bothered to correct the record on the topic this late is still anyone's guess though. It's just on the list of possibilities that his vagueposting makes unknowable.

Based on my random skimming Coomy sounds very ignorant about Nick's current situation and probably doesn't get fed exclusive info.

Searching for various keywords in the transcript pulled up at least a few highlights, none of which match the sort of "surreal" "revelation" his vagueposting was about, but which are somewhat informative as far as what narratives Nick tries to pass along through a surrogate instead of just firing up his own stream:

1. Nick and Coomalot still talk weekly, so he'd likely hear some exclusive info occasionally:

Honest question, what happened between you and Nick - still friends? Yeah we're still friends. I talk to him once a week and I mean sometimes I talk about stuff on stream, but you know, like, it's more of a like covering the drama situation.

2. Someone (presumably Nick) has communicated to Coomalot some corroboration of the speculation that April has been booted, but with an odd caveat that it depends on whether you mean a "major capacity", which sounds like just the sort of weasel-wording Nick would have used about the "minor capacity" of motel trysts with the sidepiece still being in the cards:

Now I gotta say I have no idea what's going on with April - I do know that April is out of the picture, as far as, you know, any major capacity goes, right.

3. Someone (presumably Nick) has communicated to Coomalot that arrangements are being made to save the foreclosed house, which was already expected:

Why sell the house, it makes no sense? What, sell the house? Well it was it's not about selling it, it's about the bank foreclosing the house. From what I've heard, it's not an issue and Nick's going to take care of it. From what I've heard, so I don't really know how that works. I wish it did but I just, man I've been too busy.

4. Someone (presumably Nick) has communicated to Coomalot that April cheated with Nick unbeknownst to Aaron for months and Aaron has been vindictive after "find[ing] out" about the cheating later on, which runs counter to Aaron's version that everything was strictly platonic until a spontaneous April-Kayla makeout session while the four were watching a movie sparked conversations about starting consensual swinging. Many have theorized ITT that April was already cheating during her "hunting trips" to Spicer sometime between when she first met Nick on Simpcast and when Aaron first met Nick at the later standup event that Mayr couldn't attend, but last night might be the first time that anyone in Nick's camp has corroborated that theory in so many words. On the other hand the way Coomy framed it as a way to make Aaron look relatively more cucked and make Nick look like some gigachad all makes it sound like the kind of bullshit Nick would brag about to a friend, so few will be inclined to believe it:

Aaron Imholte started spilling all the secrets, right, because he was disenfranchised by Nick because Nick was banging his wife, which is hilarious, you know. That's just a no-win situation to be cool, right? That's number one. Okay, that's number one, and also Nick was banging his wife for like seven months before Aaron even knew! Or I think he knew - I don't know what he knew, man, to be honest, but he was sitting outside the room with the door locked listening to moaning, he had to know, but he's like one of those guys where he's like, oh well she wouldn't do that. You know, he's one of those guys, oh she wouldn't do that bro she would never do such a thing, even though I hear her in there moaning and I hear macaroni and cheese mixing noises, but it's fine, definitely not happening. ... So he finds out. And I don't know how he didn't know, but he finds out Nick's been duking his chick which makes him look like a dumbass, you know, and it makes Nick look like a badass, and I've always held that opinion.

 

[AnOminous]

So what has the last year been for you rackets? 5 days ago it was something that almost made you kill yourself while the courts kicked you while you were down. Today, you call it just some weird surreal bullshit that continuously surprises you.

So this stupid dildo is continually SHOCKED and AMAZED that exactly what people warned him would happen if he kept doing the pants-on-head retarded shit he constantly does actually did happen.

I'm also guessing that he got news during the day, and then drunk-posted this at 3 am.

I bet he was seething about it all day long and only erupted after a night of heavy drinking. It's probably something really EMBARRASSING.

 

[MaltVinegarRespecter]

He certainly has the capacity. For 3 years, before his descent and assuming substances haven't ruined his brain, he existed by mocking obscure lawsuits with wit and humor.

Precisely the problem. Some people have very conditional charisma. He is one of them. His humor was fitting to that one genre of presentation. And he was in fact good at it, demonstrably so based on his view count and income. But he had a niche (and one he apparently really didn't like) and thought he was capable to bringing that personality away from commentary on lawsuits to a demand that the audience just bask in his glow and it failed spectacularly.

No one wanted Howard Cosell to pick up the fucking football and run with it. No one wanted The Nick Show where he just talks about his buffoonish takes on the world at large (at least not as the primary format). Some people simply cannot handle fame and Nick is one of them.

If he dries out his wetbrain and takes a "stick to sports" mentality of covering lawsuits like SEAN is doing he has the potential to make a comeback, but I don't think it'll ever be what it was. He chased off his original audience then spent months publicly attacking the very people that got his career in motion. The vast majority of the old guard are gone and mock him now as a pastime.

Perhaps he can cultivate a new one, but I think he should probably just start delivering packages for Amazon. He would be providing more societal benefit by bringing people the anal beads they ordered with same-day delivery than talking about "OMG guys Riley got arrested let's talk about it at 11pm Central".

 

[AnOminous]

He's trying to own the farms and thinks everyone will dig for dirt and speculate and then can expose us all!

SEAN! SEAN! SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAN!!!!!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE WHAT THOSE CRAZY KIWIFAGS ARE SAYING NOW? IT'S SO ***WEIRD*** SEEEEEEEEEEEAN!!

'The guy I slept in bed with is gay'

3. Someone (presumably Nick) has communicated to Coomalot that arrangements are being made to save the foreclosed house, which was already expected:

Balldo Man always has Balldo Plans. They don't usually work out.

I'd honestly be surprised if he doesn't somehow pull something out of the hat on that even if he has to take a haircut on it. But this is Balldo we're talking about. Failing is one thing he's really good at.

 

[Max Caulfield]

My guess is Kayla is having an affair (again) but this time she's not letting him watch, and it's with someone he didn't expect

@Fapcop Explain yourself.