🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Professional Noticer]

Piggertits is going to Rehab.

This really shows how dumbfuck this man is. Now it's Dax's fault of course, never going to be his fault.

I hate this motherfucker so much, it's unreal bros. He will never recover or get well.
He burned all the bridges he had several times over and now he complains that people "dont help him". \
He had a lot of friends and he just kept ragepigging at them at the slightest provocation until everyone went away. If you think about all the sagas over the years, he had a LOT of associates, and he ruined ALL of these relationships. And now he's surprised he's alone.
No one wants to be within his vicinity. No one wants to talk to him. He has nothing in his life. And its all deserved. He isn't going to recover shit.

Fuck off Ralph you are going to die alone and your legacy will be sharting yourself on stream multiples times. Hope you are proud of the life you led, retarded pigtits.

 

[( ◠‿◠ )]

So how does one calculate the volume of a 30+ day food mountain for two cats that live in separate rooms?

The height of the food pile depends on the angle of repose of the cat food, but the volume of food eaten by a cat in 30 days is simply 30 times the volume of food eaten by a cat in one day. If the cat eats more when more food is available, leaving it a large pile of food is inadvisable.

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

Piggertits is going to Rehab.
View attachment 6853490

"I don't want to end up like Nick Rekieta." - Ethan Ralph, 2025

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

While it would be worth the price of admission to see him in a sensory deprivation tank, everyone knows that this is a non-starter at best.

 

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

The only Rehab SMP is going to is the pool party in Vegas. Until they toss his hollerin‘ ass right back out.

 

[Balldo's Gate]

The only Rehab SMP is going to is the pool party in Vegas.

What or who is SMP? Am I missing something?

 

[jewsernotfound]

watch him lie on his intake process and not tell them he takes xanax without knowing that a dependency on benzos, alongside only alcohol, can physically kill you if you don't detox properly. not even the highest fent addiction would kill you if you went cold turkey. you'll want to die, but you're not physically going to from the detoxing. unlike benzos and alcohol.

i could absolutely see him saying "i just pop ambiens, bish" and fuckin' around and winding up dead.

 

[Oongok]

What or who is SMP? Am I missing something?

Forced nickname for Ralph that he has to shorten to SMP because of how needlessly long it is, and then inevitably has to explain it in equally long detail every time someone asks this.

See:

TBF if Shanaynay McPiggietittles knew Sean was gone he’d be very obviously and overtly wanting to be hired.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

If he wanted to do the right thing with what he has left he would be working towards leaving his kids something when he dies

He is leaving them something when he dies a life free of himself. The best gift he could ever give anyone is having him out of their life.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

What or who is SMP? Am I missing something?

don't ask, the answer is very retarded

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Ralph could do “Mexican rehab” because it’s mostly a scam and you just stay at a hotel, at a slightly increased rate and can do all the drugs you please, in between some rehab window dressing BS.

I could see Gunt trying to “fundraise” his “rehab” stay, which would basically just be an upgrade in his living quarters to take Xanax in for a few weeks, but at least he’s get some social interaction.

Check out this story, about Mexican drug rehab from fifteen years ago. Even then the more legit rehabs cost $9k a month. Maybe Gunt read he could get a 3-day detox for $900? Idk but the cartel were the big problem even back then. They aren’t going to let you keep them from their best American customers! (Or steer their business towards their cartel rivals)

Ralph isn’t going to rehab. He will just do the fake sobriety song and dance he always does, which amounts to less day time drinking but

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Ralph could do “Mexican rehab” because it’s mostly a scam and you just stay at a hotel, at a slightly increased rate and can do all the drugs you please, in between some rehab window dressing BS.

I stand corrected. Ralphamale W if that's what he's doing.

 

[Cucktry Roads]

Ralph could do “Mexican rehab” because it’s mostly a scam and you just stay at a hotel, at a slightly increased rate and can do all the drugs you please, in between some rehab window dressing BS.

I could see Gunt trying to “fundraise” his “rehab” stay, which would basically just be an upgrade in his living quarters to take Xanax in for a few weeks, but at least he’s get some social interaction.

Check out this story, about Mexican drug rehab from fifteen years ago. Even then the more legit rehabs cost $9k a month. Maybe Gunt read he could get a 3-day detox for $900? Idk but the cartel were the big problem even back then. They aren’t going to let you keep them from their best American customers! (Or steer their business towards their cartel rivals)

Ralph isn’t going to rehab. He will just do the fake sobriety song and dance he always does, which amounts to less day time drinking but

Honestly, the best thing for him to do is to go to the US and pretend to rob a bank and get thrown in jail. Best rehab and life upgrade he could hope for.

 

[RandomShirtlessMan]

I'll believe Ralph is sober when he completes one year of no internet, no alcohol, no drugs, menial/physical labor. Take one out of the equation, the other three will drag him back.

 

[MadStan]

Rehab? Ethan Oliver Ralph? That’s never going to happen. What a sad and pathetic ploy to force someone to “re-friend” them. I mean this is peak cringe.
Ethan has called no clinics. Has spoken to no one; and at best googled to seee what the cost was so he could tweet out a reliable figure.

 

[Rubber Plant]

"I don't want to end up like Nick Rekieta." - Ethan Ralph, 2025

He would have had to be successful at one point in his life for this to happen.

 

[Rage Pig]

Rehab? Ethan Oliver Ralph? That’s never going to happen. What a sad and pathetic ploy to force someone to “re-friend” them. I mean this is peak cringe.
Ethan has called no clinics. Has spoken to no one; and at best googled to seee what the cost was so he could tweet out a reliable figure.

Is $900 for 15 days even a reliable figure? I know Mexico is cheap, but $60 per day seems unrealistic.

So it costs as much as a cheap hotel, and you have doctors and nurses and 3 meals a day plus medication?

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

It's extremely possible he's fumbled the peso conversion or missed some zeros.

 

[TerrifyingPterodactyl]

Man I'm starting to think Ralph is really wants Lolcow of the year cause no way this goes well, I hope they let him stream in rehab it would be pretty funny.

 

[Pelican Bones]

Man I'm starting to think Ralph is really wants Lolcow of the year cause no way this goes well, I hope they let him stream in rehab it would be pretty funny.

Rekieta hasn't even been sentenced for all the legal shit that clinched 2024 for him. Not to mention the pending Monty case, probation period, Nick's chance to "tell all", Kayla troubles, April troubles, possible criminal charges related to Aaron, plus God only knows what else. Ralph is spent by February just like every year.

Ralphabros and BMJcels only thought they knew what a Cruel Winter was. What until you see the rest of the Cruel 2025 arc on the way to a Rekieta threepeat.