Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Guntanator]

I wonder how Garrett is feeling about all this. Will he have a role as Uncle in Jack. jr jr jr's life?

 

[Falcon Sebben]

I wonder how Garrett is feeling about all this. Will he have a role as Uncle in Jack. jr jr jr's life?

Garrett and Jr have a good relationship from what I've seen so I'm pretty sure he's going to be around for Jr ^ 3.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Jack won’t even be able to hold his own grandchild without third party support. Considering how incompetent he is at literally everything, they shouldn’t let him anywhere near the baby.

 

[Tiresome]

Can't wait until Jack unveils the harness and leash they're going to keep Jack Russell III in day and night.

 

[Gulls on Film]

What are the odds Jack dies before the baby is born?

Jack will be stubborn enough to stick around just long enough to guilt them into naming their baby Jack III.

 

[Fae Supremacist]

Are Amish deathsquads a thing?

Hanging drawing and quartering except instead of horses they tie your limbs to buggies.

 

[Mechanical Pencil]

Hanging drawing and quartering except instead of horses they tie your limbs to buggies.

That's just using horses with extra steps. Instead, tie one half of their limbs to one section of to be raised barn, the other side to a second to be raised barn and have the whole community raise two different barns at once, tearing the person in two.

Real Amish hours.

 

[biggacracka]

Do you think the baby will come out as the usual oven-baked goods of the scalfatty clan?
Black on the outside and way undercooked?

 

[LifeAlert]

Lastly Jack is going on X Spaces next week and will be having a live voice chat.

https://x.com/i/communities/1890896360054132897

If it's publicly listenable without an account, I will try to record. Unless it's going to be uploaded on F as in Frank anyway

AMISH MONDAY MOMENT #3

https://preservetube.com/watch?v=6u8blovbjbI

Jack's quest to waddle his way out of the closet is accelerating at a rapid pace, as this is the second time in the span of a year he has mentioned tranime:

https://archive.ph/ud9gX

What do you guys think he's watching? If I had to guess, Jack would be partial to disgusting vore "ONAs" laced with yaoi and cannibalism. He probably waits until bedtime, then once Hammy enters hibernation he whips out the phone. He would likely complain that there wasn't enough "meat" but that at least what's there was nice and juicy, very flavorful and pretty gud. He would reach his hand down to work on dead arm #2, only to have the phone slide off his bowling ball gunt and onto the floor. Unfortunately for him the volume is on max and he forgot to hit pause. Hammy is woken up by horrific screams and Jack just looks over at her like this:

 

[Slavic Patronym]

I wonder how Garrett is feeling about all this. Will he have a role as Uncle in Jack. jr jr jr's life?

Garrett and Jr have a good relationship from what I've seen so I'm pretty sure he's going to be around for Jr ^ 3.

Agreed. Garrett justifiably doesn't think much of his father (if that "I cut him out of my life years ago" post he made on IG as Jack lay dying is any indication), but on camera he's never seemed grudging or weird about Junior. And honestly in general Garrett seems like that about most things.

 

[Seymour Duncan]

Not sure re: Junior's job situation. So far, he seems to be following in the footsteps of his own father: random gigs and oddball flights of fancy taken here and there and abandoned whenever as his "career."

The gifted and well-paying (but hard work-requiring) HVAC job is a distant memory, of course. Then it was failed game streamer. And for a time he was a convenience store or gas station janitor, and after that he worked at a charity sneaker warehouse. Somewhere in there, I think he became the manager of a Chipotle?

I don't recall streaming as a career choice ever being seriously on the table, but he did make some big noise about aspiring to be a Christian rapper and dropping a couple of scorching singles that "somehow" never took off. IIRC that's the stupid reason why he dropped the HVAC nepo pipeline?

 

[Tiresome]

Agreed. Garrett justifiably doesn't think much of his father (if that "I cut him out of my life years ago" post he made on IG as Jack lay dying is any indication), but on camera he's never seemed grudging or weird about Junior. And honestly in general Garrett seems like that about most things.

The kid will be fortunate for two things, if Lardo Grandpa kicks off before he's old enough to know him, and to have a big fun pot-loving uncle who knows lots of cool people and hot women in the entertainment industry, to liven the tedium of living with his white trash parents and grandma.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Jack won’t even be able to hold his own grandchild without third party support. Considering how incompetent he is at literally everything, they shouldn’t let him anywhere near the baby.

He'll probably forget where he is due to his stroked out brain and try and consume the poor kid because MEAT GUD

 

[souschef]

AMISH MONDAY MOMENT #3

This fat fuck had 7 days to research and prepare his ABISH BONDAY BOMENT and he shits out a 2 minute vid which has less content than what you'd get reading superficially a wikipedia article about the subject

What a lazy idiot

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Garrett justifiably doesn't think much of his father (if that "I cut him out of my life years ago" post he made on IG as Jack lay dying is any indication)

Was this archived? Garrett sounds like he knows what’s up.

 

[LifeAlert]

Was this archived? Garrett sounds like he knows what’s up.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/jack-russell-scalfani-cooking-with-jack-jack-on-the-go-show-jakatak.13468/post-14439680

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Garrett isn’t the only one who’s been duped into reconnecting by a parent who’s supposedly dying. I hope he doesn’t fall for that old chestnut again.

 

[AnOminous]

Ah yes ingredients sourced directly from Walmart, just like the Amish did it.

There's even an Amish community in Tennessee, the largest in the South. He could have got real ingredients from an Amish grocery. Just as well he didn't, though. They'd have had to deal with this worthless fat faggot with bitch tits.

I suppose at least his presence would reinforce why they're glad they shun modernity.

Jacks choice of frozen walmart berries didn't help either.

Because the Amish are so well known for their love of frozen foods stored in electricity powered appliances. Fuck this lardass.

God took the wrong Jack. Why this Margarine Elemental lives after 5 strokes? This is the Jack we could have, but unfortunately God took him and left Jack Scalfani so he could punish us for our hubris

That looks like some fantastic whore pasta. Strongly approve of the lemon zest and capers (I have been using capers a lot lately).

Jack just definitively confirmed on his livestream that he will be redoing the lime egg video and that he will explain what the screw up was in the video. I hope he finds a way to fuck up even worse.

Imagine not just pretending that shit never happened. Instead of publicly confessing to being the dumbest motherfucker on the face of the planet.

Jack says he would never do anything "in honor" of Elmo but does reveal: "I love when people say he shouldn't look at our money information... he wasn't elected, blah blah blah. What's he gonna do? Steal your money? He's a billionaire!"

How the fuck does this fat cocksucker think billionaires end up billionaires?

At least he didnt use jell-o as a thickening agent so horraay

To be fair to this, the actual final result doesn't look too bad, even if he kind of lucked into it.

In this respect, Jack the Human Shit Balloon arguably manages to be even worse than Kay: Kay will arbitrarily divert from a recipe and declare that it's "MAH WAY" as a disclaimer immediately prior to producing an abomination.

Kay also has the advantage that she's not pure evil, malevolence and spite. She seems like a genuinely nice person. I could never shit all over her like I do Jagoff.

 

[souschef]

That looks like some fantastic whore pasta. Strongly approve of the lemon zest and capers (I have been using capers a lot lately).

His whole channel is fantastic. The beaten up pan itself tells stories. That kind of restaurant is the best there is to eat and work, that guy was really humble and really loved his craft. Jack Chaplin was everything Jack Scalfani wishes he was: a good chef, loved and missed by his community, friends and family, with earned admiration from cooks worldwide. It pisses me to no end that Jack Scalfani lives and good men like Jack Chaplin dies.

 

[AnOminous]

Jack Junior's wife, Brianna, is pregnant. This cursed blood line lives on,

I guess she found a man with a working dick who didn't prefer sticking it into little boys.

Or a duck. Because it looks like she's pregnant with a duck.

Are Amish deathsquads a thing?
Surely Scalfatty's culinary catastrophes warrants the death penalty twenty times.

Amish are almost entirely pacifists. The worst I've heard is sometimes when there is a complete reprobate who needs discipline, since they prefer not to call the cops, they'll hold him down and shave his beard off to humiliate him.

IIRC that's the stupid reason why he dropped the HVAC nepo pipeline?

I don't know how you fuck up HVAC as an occupation. I've known many people who had fucked up their lives in various ways, drugs, crimes, etc. who were otherwise unemployable but once they got their HVAC certs they could write their own ticket.