r/FedNews

[Cuntspiracy Man]

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Fucking cheap eggs, let's gooooooo

when you can't have your "i'm soooo quirk chungus xD" and your "guys this is DEAD SERIOUS!" at the same time

 

[ephermeral]

Are there any good threads to find out how to spot a fed in the wild? I’ve noticed that a lot of parents who troon out their kids are speculated to be current or former feds and am curious to why that is. I know it’s a “thing” but I don’t know what characteristics I should be looking for?

 

[nelly98]

If we can get enough white Americans all across our country to support returning our nation back to 1924 where women were confined to their kitchens and blacks could only be employed in jobs servicing white people or confined to farm labor there won't be any black drug gangs or any black students taking college seats away from our white children... or any females or black people causing air accidents because they were given jobs that only white men are qualified to do.

I can get on board with this.

 

[Alaina's Rotdog]

Bunch of upset feds who dogpile ANYONE who says RIF is a good thing (it is). Enjoy

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

Are there any good threads to find out how to spot a fed in the wild? I’ve noticed that a lot of parents who troon out their kids are speculated to be current or former feds and am curious to why that is. I know it’s a “thing” but I don’t know what characteristics I should be looking for?

Same as identifying a vegetarian.

They'll tell you.

 

[quaawaa]

Elon Musk sent every fed an email asking them to list five things they did last week and warned them that failing to respond to the email will be taken as a resignation:

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The email:

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Initially I thought this was a dumb idea because there is no way that DOGE can read 2 million emails, but then I remembered that feds are retarded.

They're telling each other to NOT send the email or to send jokes instead of serious replies:


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[invisibult plus+]

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Fucking cheap eggs, let's gooooooo

I’ll enjoy my cheap gas, and subsequently my cheap everything, thank you very much.

 

[huesofmercury]

 

[Legalize Asbestos]

I'm seeing posts and videos about the layoffs and the things they're mentioning as being super shocking are things that have been very common for at least 10 years now in the private sector.

It's generally understood that if you work for the government you are choosing the 'low risk, low reward' path. A cushy job that is nearly impossible to be fired from, with very little accountability, but you'll never be rich or important doing it. Anyone who prizes stability considers the government option since they print the money.

This state of affairs has been flipped on its head in the past twenty years or so. DEI ensured retards got into these positions and made the bureaucracies inoperable. They were also awarded benefits, pay raises, and vacation time better than most will find in the private sector - to maintain lockstep loyalty to politicians. In short, pigs sat at the table, and so the table became a trough.

 

[Chilson]

Initially I thought this was a dumb idea because there is no way that DOGE can read 2 million emails, but then I remembered that feds are retarded.

They're telling each other to NOT send the email or to send jokes instead of serious replies:

The Fedditors shitting themselves and coping over this complete nonsense email is hilarious. Elon is really huffing copium if he thinks this in anyway going to actually work as some form of consent for a resignation though. They have managed to push everything else through the courts because those actions were legal and within executive authority, but failure to answer an email leading to a resignation is most certainly not. Especially when he is only giving them half a day realistically to respond.

Even private companies that absolutely despise their employees wouldn't send out such a retarded email.

 

[Barry McKockner]

The Fedditors shitting themselves and coping over this complete nonsense email is hilarious. Elon is really huffing copium if he thinks this in anyway going to actually work as some form of consent for a resignation though. They have managed to push everything else through the courts because those actions were legal and within executive authority, but failure to answer an email leading to a resignation is most certainly not. Especially when he is only giving them half a day realistically to respond.

Even private companies that absolutely despise their employees wouldn't send out such a retarded email.

I would think any response will suffice. People who don't answer at all will be looked at closely, followed by meme responses.

 

[Chilson]

I would think any response will suffice. People who don't answer at all will be looked at closely, followed by meme responses.

That will just open them up to another lawsuit to be frank, except it would actually have some basis rather than the rest of the frivolous nonsense they have been throwing around in the courts.

Its just a really stupid tactic when your already laying people off. Just proceed with the layoffs rather than open up DOGE to such a lawsuit.

 

[Barry McKockner]

That will just open them up to another lawsuit to be frank, except it would actually have some basis rather than the rest of the frivolous nonsense they have been throwing around in the courts.

Its just a really stupid tactic.

As long as the email isn't the basis for the removal, it's fine. Nonresponse could be followed up with a formal investigation, and if suitable, the employee terminated for RIF. It would be like using a magnet to find needles in a haystack.

 

[xXthrowawayaccountXx]

Initially I thought this was a dumb idea because there is no way that DOGE can read 2 million emails, but then I remembered that feds are retarded.

They're telling each other to NOT send the email or to send jokes instead of serious replies:

I've gone from uninterest to open hatred of these people. Not to give to much away, I have a job in IT. They want you to log everything, and that is an expected part of the process for everyone involved. I remember talking to one guy to just transferred saying that it had to be minute by minute logs the second you got off the phone or stood up from your desk at his last job. Yet these cretins who get a full ride can't give a fucking bullet point summary? Of a full week? I hope it's legal for Elon to fire all these dipshits.

 

[Kenny Blankenship]

- Le hekkin' quirky trash animal
- Stars War reference

Elon is mega retarded, but even he doesn't compare to these superfluous glow-worms.

 

[ephermeral]

Same as identifying a vegetarian.

They'll tell you.

But how can I tell if they glow or not?

 

[IAmNotAlpharius]

It’d be funny if they just fired everyone who doesn’t reply lol and kept everyone else.

 

[Cuntspiracy Man]

that email thing is absolutely a pisstake, elon is just having fun here, i guarantee it
and the responses are golden

i love this habit they have of teaching one another what to do and how exactly to respond to anything troubling, word by word at times
who knew the federal agencies were all a buncha emotional support circles

 

[Hybrid Hubris]

Let these fedditors post rickrolls and ChatGPT responses and fire themselves. I think that's what Elon wanted them to do.
The entitlement of these idiots astounds me. If the new boss at work tells you to jump, you ask, how high? You don't disobey him because you like the old boss better. In the real world, you can't just refuse to participate in a performance evaluation. That shit will get you fired. But this is the federal government, where apparently people have been getting away with being petulant brats for their entire careers, until Elon came in and started whipping things into shape.
I can't wait for the fedocaust to happen. I hope all of them become homeless bums, miserable and alone, freezing out in the cold who have to hold out mugs for change. I want to be in Washington D.C. and drench them in water after driving through a large puddle.

I'm talking about National Parks employees (no telework if you're a ranger,) and fucking veterans. You hate US soldiers too now? Why are you such an entitled little cunt?

Also I have a private job, one that doesn't involve dealing with idiots, so no thanks.



No, allot of seniors, poor people, and contractors I've spoken with are unhappy and scared. And this isn't a minor fucking reshuffling. Firing our entire nuclear specialist team and closing whole agencies is not minor.

Stop being triggered by someone disagreeing with you.

Gotta crack a few eggs to make an omelette.

 

[porkWellington]

The Fedditors shitting themselves and coping over this complete nonsense email is hilarious. Elon is really huffing copium if he thinks this in anyway going to actually work as some form of consent for a resignation though. They have managed to push everything else through the courts because those actions were legal and within executive authority, but failure to answer an email leading to a resignation is most certainly not. Especially when he is only giving them half a day realistically to respond.

Even private companies that absolutely despise their employees wouldn't send out such a retarded email.

I think the point is to "prove" employees are bad performers and can legally justify the firing. Either what they sincerely answer won't be good enough or a non answer means they aren't working.