Ubisoft Sellout - Bankruptcy Speedrun Any% Thread

For those unaware, theres a game coming out on the 20th called Yasuke Simulator on Steam. It's pretty much a straight parody of AC Shadowface, and has a demo available as well. Dont know if it will be any good, but at least its funny.

The Game is just a Meme but the Trailer is worth its Megabytes in Gold and provided me more fun than Ubisoft ever did, so Yasuke Simulator wins by default.
 
Ubisoft can't stop fucking up
Crosspost, but a streamer has been banned for... streaming a game Ubisoft paid them to promote.
Olivia Monroe (low 4view, collabs with Phase's Kaneko Lumi sometimes) has been banned from twitch as of 20 minutes ago https://streamerbans.com/user/oliviamonroe

Her page says "Content from this channel has been removed at the request of the copyright holder."

I watched a bit before it happened, but was not watching when it happened. She was playing Assassin's Creed: Shadows, which was odd because none of the big streamers were playing it yet. She thought drops were on and someone in chat said they weren't for some hours (apparently 10am PST so still another 2 hours or so).

There are other streamers on twitch under the category, but the biggest one is playing Mirage (not Shadows) and the rest are waiting rooms.

My guess is that she probably wasn't supposed to play until 10am PST

They're unbanned now after about 6 hours, but man.
 
MBA graduates who thinks line goes up is the only metric that matters, even when it destroys the business long term.
1742336288244.png
They didn't listen to him and now the corporate world shall perish in flames.
 

The Game is just a Meme but the Trailer is worth its Megabytes in Gold and provided me more fun than Ubisoft ever did, so Yasuke Simulator wins by default.
Japanese gamers love it
SmartSelect_20250318_221139_Firefox.jpg

i'm from japan, but this is exactly what i learned in my high school textbook
It was
-
the 1st cause of death of samurai at that time was the daruma trap
-
I am Japanese, but I guarantee the historical accuracy of this game
-
i am japanese.this game is based on historical facts
This is the first time I've ever seen a woman in my life, and I've never seen a woman in my life.
 

AAAA quality right there.

Oda's sister gets BLACKED, because of course she does:


Long katana.webp

Ah yes the most famous of the Japanese swords the odachi long katana, Jesus Christ it's like they didn't even try, except I'm fairly certain they did and this was the best they can manage.
 
Ah yes the most famous of the Japanese swords the odachi long katana, Jesus Christ it's like they didn't even try, except I'm fairly certain they did and this was the best they can manage.
I'm this close to an IRL reee from how fucking badly they've botched what a quick Wikipedia search would show.

A quick TL;DR for those who don't feel like looking it up: Tachi were longer, slightly straighter blades carried as a primary weapon before the rise of the bow and spear, but still worn by high-ranking samurai as symbols of office at this time, katana were a few inches shorter and had a slightly heavier curve to allow them to be drawn more easily in tight quarters since they were primarily a backup weapon to either the bow or the spear, and the odachi/nodachi was the least-used type at this point but still extant among shock infantry units or those just wishing to boast about what big guys they were (for you!), had a blade about four to five feet long, needed to be slung on the back, and only the tallest dudes around can properly swing it, and they also tended to have the least curve of all to them since long things and tight curves don't mix well for linear movements like being drawn from a scabbard.

Of course, all of those blades did get curvier over time as a matter of aesthetics to match current trends with the katana, especially as the odachi went from a field weapon to a shrine offering where it was never intended to be drawn in anger, but up above is what you could generally expect from this time period.
View attachment 7108211
They didn't listen to him and now the corporate world shall perish in flames.
1742352142250.png
So, out of all of those 7 big issues and 8 small issues, it looks like the modern corporate world has deliberately gone out of their way to tick off as many as they could.
 
Last edited:
On top of all the other shit why the hell does a single player game have a battle pass?
 
Back