The Greater Kiwi Farms - or the Größere Kiwi-Bauernhöfe if you prefer

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What monthly amount sounds reasonable?

  • $40 (300 to goal)

  • $30 (400 to goal)

  • $20 (600 to goal)

  • Not interested

Results are only viewable after voting.
Sledgehammer Lobotomy said:
@Null Can you make something that lets you know if you got a reply to your post. I have to wade thru updoots a lot and miss replies sometimes.
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You can (and should because stickers are for faggots) turn off updoot notifications.
 
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Null said:
  1. Go to your real-world bank account and set up a bill pay to send a $40* check to our PO Box. It will ask you for an account number; you supply your billpay id.
  2. Set it up to automatically go out each month.
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I'm fine with sending you some cash to keep the site running, but idk how I feel about setting up a monthly subscription. Maybe along with these subscriptions you can run occasional fundraisers, either through your stream or on select days, encouraging people to send a one-off check. btw I thought you were aware of bill pay when you were lamenting about your charity being blocked by payment processors and didn't want to use it for whatever reason, or else I would have mentioned it to you.

Sledgehammer Lobotomy said:
Can you make something that lets you know if you got a reply to your post. I have to wade thru updoots a lot and miss replies sometimes.
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open wide, here comes the spoon

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Null said:
I mean the numbers are there for $20 to meet my goals. I'll try it. Hopefully it's not a mistake.
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Not to worry dear leader we won't let you down!

Josh on a serious note if you think 600 posters will pay 20 bucks a month you're smoking more crack than bossman. Most likely it will be around 100 paid users, most people are going to wait and if see benefits are worth the price.
 
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J.R. "Bob" Dobbs said:
Not to worry dear leader we won't let you down!

Josh on a serious note if you think 600 posters will pay 20 bucks a month you're smoking more crack than bossman. Most likely it will be around 100 paid users, most people are going to wait and if see benefits are worth the price.
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I mean we get a lot of orders during merch sales. The people are on the site. I'm not sure why a site of this size shouldn't make money.
 
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J.R. Bob Dobbs said:
Josh on a serious note if you think 600 posters will pay 20 bucks a month you're smoking more crack than bossman
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that's my thinking as well. asking for a $5 or $10 subscription is more likely to see better results. And then like I said above, he can run an occasional fundraiser to encourage people to send in one-off checks. If it's a one-off people are more comfortable sending larger dollar amounts. It's one thing to send a single donation of $40-50. it's another to commit to sending that same amount every month.

edit: I figured to go a little deeper with my thinking. It's a matter of perspective. When you're asking somebody to commit to a large dollar amount monthly subscription/donation, they're going to rationalize and compare that to other subscriptions/bills they have. For example, my internet bill is around $60/month. That gives me access to the ENTIRE internet. Compared to that, a $40/month donation to keep a SINGLE website afloat is a pretty hard sell for me. Granted, I never jumped on the whole patreon/donating to streamers thing, I'm not a paypig, maybe there are plenty of people happy to throw you $40 a month for the foreseeable future.
 
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Null said:
I mean we get a lot of orders during merch sales. The people are on the site. I'm not sure why a site of this size shouldn't make money.
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All I'm trying to say is if it does reach 600+ subscriptions, most likely it'll be a slow crawl to the goal.

I'll gladly eat my words if I'm wrong.
 
What about non-Americans sending you $$$?

Null said:
You might notice the site runs like shit. That's because we've got bandwidth caps but most importantly we've got a serious disk issue. Harddrives are easily the most expensive part of a server. Our current server cost $10,000, a ton of that went to drives, and it is a deprecating asset. We use 16T out of 26T but the actual NVMe I'd like to use for the database is toast and it frequently bottlenecks as a result of S3 and DB fighting each other for disk I/O that the raid is sparse on despite its size because of its high level of redundancy. Also, some of those drives are already failing. I think Cloudflare was saying we issue more than 200TB of data a month before they dropped us.
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I'm clearly a newfag but are you running the entire website off a $10,000 pizza box with spinning disks?
 
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Robin's Donuts said:
What about non-Americans sending you $$$?
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The check will have to be in USD, but outside of that it doesn't matter where it comes from. I'll look into how Western Union works eventually.

Robin's Donuts said:
I'm clearly a newfag but are you running the entire website off a $10,000 pizza box with spinning disks?
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They're SSDs but we have an immense amount of data and database activity.
 
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Null said:
The check will have to be in USD, but outside of that it doesn't matter where it comes from. I'll look into how Western Union works eventually.


They're SSDs but we have an immense amount of data and database activity.
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Damn that's crazy this entire site is being hosted off a single server that is relatively "cheap". At work we just spent $10,000 (Maplebux so more like $6000 USD) just for a new Veeam (backup) server that is doing fuck all for most of the day except when backups run at night.
 
Robin's Donuts said:
Damn that's crazy this entire site is being hosted off a single server that is relatively "cheap". At work we just spent $10,000 (Maplebux so more like $6000 USD) just for a new Veeam (backup) server that is doing fuck all for most of the day except when backups run at night.
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The site's so bottlenecked I actually cache hot attachments in a ramdisk because we have more memory than i/o. i squeeze everything I can out of it.
 
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J.R. Bob Dobbs said:
Not to worry dear leader we won't let you down!

Josh on a serious note if you think 600 posters will pay 20 bucks a month you're smoking more crack than bossman. Most likely it will be around 100 paid users, most people are going to wait and if see benefits are worth the price.
Click to expand...
J.R. Bob Dobbs said:
All I'm trying to say is if it does reach 600+ subscriptions, most likely it'll be a slow crawl to the goal.

I'll gladly eat my words if I'm wrong.
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500 XL Trick or Treat Hamster shirts sold out in SIX HOURS! Do you have any idea how feezed and felted I was???
 
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How hard is it to do the tiered system? I definitely think some people would be willing to throw $40 at the website a month, while others are only willing to throw $20 (closer in price to a regular streaming platform). I agree there should be a slight tiered system of (just for example) bronze at $20, silver at $30, gold at $40, and platinum at $50+. Maybe throw them all in a board like supporters but give the higher paying members access to the things like (a mod reviewed) feature system, a special banner around their profile, and definitely add some special stickers or smilies (as much as is possible). I'd really like to see paid for stickers (which you said would be a nightmare and I believe it) because I know people would go crazy for that shit.
 
Null said:
The remainder goes to me. I now live in the most expensive country in the world where non-torture eggs are $9 a dozen, rent starts at $1500/mo for a crackshack on Martin Luther King Jr Blvd, and you're responsible for your own healthcare if you make too much money (calculated at your GROSS income, not after business expenses, so I can't get gibmedat healthcare). I've managed to budget the Kiwi Farms into a life funded entirely by sporadic donations because I lived in Ukraine, which had the lowest cost of living in Europe. I simply did without.

This is not a profitable website. I've paid out of pocket for it my entire life. I've been handling crypto for 10 years now, since Bitcoin was under $100, but I have nothing to show for it because it's all gone to the Kiwi Farms. $12,000/mo is an extremely reasonable goal for the world's most controversial website.
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God fucking damnit Null. I hate the bullshit you have to go through just to keep this lovable bunch of retards going. I tell you what.... I have a couple dozen free-range chickens, and live within a stones throw of the top 2 cheese makers in [REDACTED]. If you're ever in my area of the world (Farmville), I'll gladly give you all the fresh eggs you want. And will take you on a tour of some of the finest artesian cheesemakers in the US.

I honestly don't give a fuck about most of the proposed paypig features, but I'll definitely throw you a few sheckels monthly whenever you have everything set up.*

*Also I'd like the option of infinite scroll iinstead of endlessly clicking pages, plz.
 
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