Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Stinkyboy]

Lucas is probably been on the weird section of porn tubes... We know he's a porn addict, hilarious for someone who can't even get it up. He's already had sex with a man, he's actually had more sex with men than women in his life. There's a word for that, it's... feggit. Lucas Colby Werner is into man sex. I know he's stuck in the 90s and ashamed of his faggot behavior, so he's trying to gaslight himself into trannies are girls. He can take load after load into his gullet and be straight.

I just think he's watching a lot of tranny porn and almost felt ashamed of himself.

Lucas views on people are really just black and white, and when he gets caught with people not always feeling one "set" way it breaks his autism mind and he just reverts to screaming bigot.

his claim to fame is literally hitting on underage girls

 

[HackerX]

Yeah i had to go back and look it up on the FB brokeposting page

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The absolute lack of self awareness was incredible.

Textbook childlike behavior. It's the direct result of Myrna babying her special little boy. I'm wondering if she took wee lil' Lucas for ice cream or food every time there was an event at school that he didn't win or get picked for.

Is a transgender woman really a woman or really a man? Discuss in the comments below

Lucas sure does have a hardon about troons lately. This video makes me wonder if he thinks he found some troon potentially interested in him and is hoping for a bunch of 'really a woman' responses to justify how its totally not gay to fuck a troon. It does come off as how he does shit when he's trying to rationalize doing something

Oh he's definitely trying to rationalize something in relation to troons. I hope to God it has nothing to do with those pics of his stepdad a few pages back. Lucas has fantasized about all kinds of dudes fucking his mom, so I can not comprehend the thoughts he'd have about his stepdad in drag, IF he's aware of those pics. Please please please let it be some tranny messing with Lucas and not some really weird shit involving him wanting to impregnate his stepdad.

 

[Dread First]

I've been combing through the older highlights in this thread for the last couple of weeks, and Cyril popping in and giving his $0.02 on Lucas was... illuminating to say the least. I'm almost sad that he's not a thread regular, but hey, mans got a life of his own to live and just wanted to clear the air on an old roommate from 15-20 years ago. I hope Cyril's doing well, wherever he may be.

Edit: Username is @DefunctGames if you're just as out of the loop as I was and wanna see his takes. Genuinely fantastic shit.

 

[HackerX]

I've been combing through the older highlights in this thread for the last couple of weeks, and Cyril popping in and giving his $0.02 on Lucas was... illuminating to say the least. I'm almost sad that he's not a thread regular, but hey, mans got a life of his own to live and just wanted to clear the air on an old roommate from 15-20 years ago. I hope Cyril's doing well, wherever he may be.

Edit: Username is @DefunctGames if you're just as out of the loop as I was and wanna see his takes. Genuinely fantastic shit.

This thread's highlights are strong and don't really show their age. IDK if it's just because Lucas doesn't change or what, but I'll occasionally do the same and learn some new aspect. And yeah, the mans provided great insight into the other sides of the stories and shows how Lucas lives in his own little world.

The latest: (Tried to throw it on preservetube, but getting an error.

Apparently God flooded the world to destroy evil and killed Jesus to do the same. Who knew? He obviously believes God is an authoritarian micro-manager and the fact God hasn't yeeted him a telomeres-lovin' bae is proof there can be no God.

I'm really curious if he knows that a great flood actually happened or if Jesus was very likely a real person. No idea how he'd react, but I don't even think he could rationalize it in his own, retarded way. Like, I don't think he can grasp those are real things that happened since he'd have to mesh literal and abstract concepts and it's either one of the other to him. It's also disregarding that he has no clue what an abstract concept is, but I digress.

 

[WonderWino]

This thread's highlights are strong and don't really show their age. IDK if it's just because Lucas doesn't change or what, but I'll occasionally do the same and learn some new aspect. And yeah, the mans provided great insight into the other sides of the stories and shows how Lucas lives in his own little world.

The latest: (Tried to throw it on preservetube, but getting an error.

Apparently God flooded the world to destroy evil and killed Jesus to do the same. Who knew? He obviously believes God is an authoritarian micro-manager and the fact God hasn't yeeted him a telomeres-lovin' bae is proof there can be no God.

I'm really curious if he knows that a great flood actually happened or if Jesus was very likely a real person. No idea how he'd react, but I don't even think he could rationalize it in his own, retarded way. Like, I don't think he can grasp those are real things that happened since he'd have to mesh literal and abstract concepts and it's either one of the other to him. It's also disregarding that he has no clue what an abstract concept is, but I digress.

Lucas has said, multiple times, that jesus was never a real person that actually existed. He claims the proof of this is the fact we don't have his body, a tomb with him in it or his fossilized body. He seems to be entirely unaware that a) it wouldn't make sense to expect jesus's body to be fossilized, b) we don't have the bodies of most people that ever lived, let alone important historical people and his 'logic' could be used to claim caesar, augustus and alexander were never real either, as well as just about every other major historical figure. Especially of that area. He claims rather than being a real person, jesus is a mythical figure created by ripping off a bunch of older religions. Completely ignoring the fact there are documents discussing him from his era

In other words lucas is a follower of the christ myth theory and can't even get that right. I suspect he's got some twisted idea of 'christianity is make believe therefore its founder never existed' or something to that extent. Which is like saying L Ron Hubbard never existed cause scientology is looney bs

That said he clearly doesn't understand the whole point of the flood or jesus getting killed (hint: it had nothing to do with evil lucas) i'm not even a christian and I know that. Hell, everybody knows the whole dying on the cross thing was supposed to be dying for humanities sins, not to rid the world of evil. Shows how little he understands what he supposedly studies. Really makes you wonder how he twists telomere and genetic shit he reads on the internet around in his swiss cheese brain. I can just imagine lucas trying to find a zoomer bae by sitting through a church service, giving a twitchy bug eyed angry stare at the priest the entire time until the voices on the wind demand he 'correct' the stuff the priest is saying, resulting in lucas angrily talking complete nonsense like that video and getting told nobody has ever claimed what he's saying is true. You just know that would lead to him chimping out to the point he got thrown out, if not having to call the cops

EDIT:

Found a thread on prospering grounds that made me think this guy might be the black lucas werner. Some real interesting parallels going on there. Might be worth keeping an eye on that one

 

[Club Sandwich]

iirc the big JC has arrest records between both Jewish, Egyptian, and Roman authorities including court documents. leaving out all the religious aspects, in thousands of years people around the world from different backgrounds, cultures, and through revolutions, wars, and doctrines, generally agree he was a real living person of some minor importance at the time.

 

[WonderWino]

I'm surprised lucas hasn't used his time at mallon place to try to get the other speds together to discuss politics like he used to do at the homeless shelter with people who would tolerate him somewhat, like shareef. Maybe restart his looney political party from years ago to 'fight trump'

Rather than promising a chicken in every pot lucas's campaign slogan would be three hots, a cot and a thot for every hobo - irl government mandated girlfriends. I'd say he's take a tip from north korea on that one but if he knew about the 2 wives dresnok was given (one of which kidnapped just for him) and all the stuff he got for defecting he'd try to do the LA saga 2.0 only to find some way to defect to north korea as a fellow socialist

Something tells me north koreans have never seen anyone that fat in person and would probably think he was some kind of grotesque capitalist monster, and then at best stuff him in some kind of anti american museum as a one man freakshow, to demonstrate the degeneracy of the US. Feeding him a bowl of rice and a bucket of fish heads once per week. That or they'd just bayonet him, carve him up and feed the locals for a couple weeks....and then cause an MRSA outbreak in the country

EDIT:

I wonder how long it will be before lucas sees this and rees about it for a few weeks

 

[Bassomatic]

So what's the over under of Lucas eating easter candy, then waddling over to the local church to get a free easter meal ?

It's hilarious as said before almost no one aside Lucas doesn't think Jesus was real. As said there's paperwork about him, lots. First hand reports etc. Even if you go on the limb that "batman has books about him too" there's no government records or piles of first hand stories. Bruce Wayne doesn't have a social security # or passport just because some senator is a big batman fan, there's not stories of "that time I met batman" Aside maybe a comic written in the first person.

To say Jesus wasn't real.. is just mentally ill, almost like something someone with schizo problems would have... some one that stupid and mentally ill couldn't take care of themselves and be in a care home.

While all of us were having a nice Easter Lucas was trying to jerk his mirco peen, looking at children's' swim suit ads, chewing on a loaf of stale bread he stole from a church pantry and crying. If that doesn't prove god is real, what more do you need?

 

[WonderWino]

So in the comments section of walters latest video:

Look who showed up making bizarre claims again:

Sure looks awfully identical to dreamchaser doesn't it? Now calling herself 'brittanie mcdonell' Even trying to hide half her face like she always does when she pops up

 

[moseph.jartelli]

W

So in the comments section of walters latest video:

Look who showed up making bizarre claims again:
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Sure looks awfully identical to dreamchaser doesn't it? Now calling herself 'brittanie mcdonell' Even trying to hide half her face like she always does when she pops up

Wow. That name is a blast from.the past. Good ol dreamchaser.

 

[Da Dude123]

So in the comments section of walters latest video:

Look who showed up making bizarre claims again:
View attachment 7260736
Sure looks awfully identical to dreamchaser doesn't it? Now calling herself 'brittanie mcdonell' Even trying to hide half her face like she always does when she pops up

Dream chaser should have said instead of "she and her friends started barking at him like a dog", she should have said "they started moooing at him like a cow". That would have been a better made up story.

 

[Bassomatic]

@Fatal Walter Good video as always, but you missed one detail I wish you pointed out, Lucas has fake teeth, paid for by the government. I just wanted to point that out. He really hates that fact.

I def dig the may-may you made it sums Lucas up so well.

 

[HackerX]

Lucas has returned after his brief absence.

I always love it when he's so close to stumbling into really philosophical questions, but he's so pants-on-head retarded that he's completely unaware of the questions he's asking himself. According to Lucas, God doesn't exist since he hasn't materialized in front of him to yeet him a bae. He doesn't understand the very concept of a concept.

 

[WonderWino]

Lucas has returned after his brief absence.

I always love it when he's so close to stumbling into really philosophical questions, but he's so pants-on-head retarded that he's completely unaware of the questions he's asking himself. According to Lucas, God doesn't exist since he hasn't materialized in front of him to yeet him a bae. He doesn't understand the very concept of a concept.

If there is a god who sin? created the devil? why does evil exist?

This coming from the guy who claims to be some kind of expert on christianity

I'm starting to question if lucas is even aware of who said devil actually is according to christianity. 'who created the devil' is a really strange question for him to ask given that according to christianity the devil was an angel and god created said angels. all of the things lucas asks in this video are things that a literal child would be able to explain to him. that shit is covered in kids sunday school

That said, lucas keeps harping on about if god existed he would show himself to lucas and give him what he wants. so his logic is said god hasn't shown itself so it doesn't exist. this directly contradicts years of lucas's rantings about how trillions of alien species exist in the universe. aliens that we so far have absolutely zero evidence for and have never seen. lucas just assumes they exist because science and his absurdly poor understanding of said science, yet he reees at christians for saying they believe god exists because of faith in something they haven't actually seen. he's legitimately too stupid to realize he's laughing at them for the exact same thing he is doing

Though I am a bit surprised he hasn't gloated over the pope dying, on easter no less as proof of there being no god. I wonder if he has even heard about that yet

 

[Krathnami]

Dreamchaser is more of a cow than Lucas

 

[not in the cards]

lucas keeps harping on about if god existed he would show himself to lucas and give him what he wants.

Remember his reasoning was because god hasn't rocked up and yeeted him a 20 year old bae, pizza hut tastes bad and that the holocaust happened (in that order) he therefore doesn't exist. I'm assuming that this was his attempt at arguing about god permitting suffering but all Lucas did was expose his selfishness in that he not only prioritises himself and his own desires before anyone else, but he has such childish, primitive priorities to begin with and he's too blinded by his own selfishness and greed to see the bigger picture.

 

[WonderWino]

Given lucas's recent content drought I thought i'd dig around and check out his older stuff. I noticed something interesting in this one:

Aside from the general lunacy of the video, I noticed one interesting thing - lucas brags that he likes cilantro....after first claiming he doesn't have the gene that some people do that make it taste like soap...then immediately contradicting his lie and admitting that it does taste like soap to him....and then admitting he actually likes that. It really makes me wonder whether he is one of those retards that actually licks and/or eats soap like a fucked up child - there was one of those in my elementary school as a kid who kept getting in shit cause he'd brag about how he was raiding the candy dish and taking his parents expensive candies to trade at school, and when nobody ate them he sat around eating them himself. The thing is, those 'candies' were those mini bars of fancy soap with fancy wrappers that were kept in a bowl in his bathroom and he was retarded enough to think they were candy. Seems like something young lucas would have done and statements like that support it. Also assuming thats the case it makes me wonder about that time he posted the video of him licking a womans deodorant stick. Creepy as fuck as it was, something tells me he also did it not just for sexual purposes but because he liked the taste. I wouldn't put it past him to have actually tried to eat it

Considering these classics of wern cooking, is it really that unlikely?

That said, since lucas has been reeeing about troons so much lately, lets not forget he also posted this:

 

[Stinkyboy]

so lucas is trooning out?

 

[Da Dude123]

Almost a week since we heard from lolcow, Lucas Werner. I sort of miss him posting on Facebook. His lunacy is a lot more condensed. I wonder if he forgot his password and can't figure out how to reset it? I wonder if something is going on with the cow. Typically, longer than a week of updates from the cow means something happened like a chimpout or him falling out and going to the hospital. I wish we had some new Lucas in the wild pics from our Spokane kiwis.

 

[WonderWino]

Almost a week since we heard from lolcow, Lucas Werner. I sort of miss him posting on Facebook. His lunacy is a lot more condensed. I wonder if he forgot his password and can't figure out how to reset it? I wonder if something is going on with the cow. Typically, longer than a week of updates from the cow means something happened like a chimpout or him falling out and going to the hospital. I wish we had some new Lucas in the wild pics from our Spokane kiwis.

I wonder if he chimped out over somebody at mallon place being upset about the pope dying, having it inevitably devolve into reeing about god not giving him a gf therefore he doesn't exist so pope bad. The timing certainly fits. I'd wonder if he was at the hospital otherwise but if that were the case he'd have posted something about it from the hospital by now, barring it being something serious enough to flat out prevent him from doing so