🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Pelican Bones]

Isn't this like the 5th phone he "lost"?

To be honest I'm split on if he lost them or he got mugged cause he's such an obvious mark. But he's also brained damaged enough to just forget where he put it.

At this point I'm convinced that whatever it is that's actually happening with his phones, claiming to be too drunk and too stupid to hang on to it is simply less embarrassing for him.

 

[HackerX]

The pig should just get it over with and join IP2 or similar group.

Nope. He had an interaction with IP2 in Vegas a few years back. They were making fun of him and hollerin' had no effect, so he tucked his curly tail between his legs and waddled off. That episode is the reason why Ralph veered away from IRL streams, where there is any potential for something like that to happen again.

He showcased fear of it again in Minnesota with "I'm not Ethan Ralph" and doing none of the shit he swore up and down to against those ebil Kiwi Farmers and that dastardly Jawsh Moom. The dude is legitimately terrified of running into people, who know who he is, in a public setting. Those of us in "the business" refer to his fear as "bitch made".

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

Nope. He had an interaction with IP2 in Vegas a few years back. They were making fun of him and hollerin' had no effect, so he tucked his curly tail between his legs and waddled off. That episode is the reason why Ralph veered away from IRL streams, where there is any potential for something like that to happen again.

He showcased fear of it again in Minnesota with "I'm not Ethan Ralph" and doing none of the shit he swore up and down to against those ebil Kiwi Farmers and that dastardly Jawsh Moom. The dude is legitimately terrified of running into people, who know who he is, in a public setting. Those of us in "the business" refer to his fear as "bitch made"

IP2 is completely out since he mouth raped Alice.

 

[30+GameOvers]

Nope. He had an interaction with IP2 in Vegas a few years back. They were making fun of him and hollerin' had no effect, so he tucked his curly tail between his legs and waddled off. That episode is the reason why Ralph veered away from IRL streams, where there is any potential for something like that to happen again.

He showcased fear of it again in Minnesota with "I'm not Ethan Ralph" and doing none of the shit he swore up and down to against those ebil Kiwi Farmers and that dastardly Jawsh Moom. The dude is legitimately terrified of running into people, who know who he is, in a public setting. Those of us in "the business" refer to his fear as "bitch made".

IP2 is completely out since he mouth raped Alice.

Doesn't matter, piggy has no choice. Soon, these are the only people who will welcome him, just like with OnlyUseMeBlade(OnlyUseMeGunt?). This is how bad it is, soon he will spend a Christmas Eve in a trailer as some retard called "Orange" will stream himself jumping up and down at you. He will wish he was at this piss stained tin shack in Mexico then.

 

[HackerX]

Doesn't matter, piggy has no choice. Soon, these are the only people who will welcome him, just like with OnlyUseMeBlade(OnlyUseMeGunt?). This is how bad it is, soon he will spend a Christmas Eve in a trailer as some retard called "Orange" will stream himself jumping up and down at you. He will wish he was at this piss stained tin shack in Mexico then.

LOL. He absolutely has a choice. It'll be the same choice he makes for everything else. He'll shit his pants, do nothing, and holler on xitter. Even if Ralph wasn't bitch made, he always chooses the most passive option.

I know "he let his life pass him by" is a cliche, but Ralph is the definitive use case. His resources will continue to dwindle and he'll wither away down in Mehico until he just disappears. Sure, there'll be several more pillstreams and losing his phones, but Ralph will eventually stop posting for a week and everyone will assume he's dead again. Except this time, it's for real. Then, a month later, no one outside of the forum will remember that Ethan Oliver Ralph was ever alive, and that's because he wasn't. He let his life pass him by.

 

[30+GameOvers]

LOL. He absolutely has a choice. It'll be the same choice he makes for everything else. He'll shit his pants, do nothing, and holler on xitter. Even if Ralph wasn't bitch made, he always chooses the most passive option.

I know "he let his life pass him by" is a cliche, but Ralph is the definitive use case. His resources will continue to dwindle and he'll wither away down in Mehico until he just disappears. Sure, there'll be several more pillstreams and losing his phones, but Ralph will eventually stop posting for a week and everyone will assume he's dead again. Except this time, it's for real. Then, a month later, no one outside of the forum will remember that Ethan Oliver Ralph was ever alive, and that's because he wasn't. He let his life pass him by.

One thing piggy always was and always will be, is a coward. Eventually, he won't even be able to afford whatever meager amounts of drugs, alcohol and tortas he's having right now, even in a cheap shithole like Mexico. His options will dwindle, and he will have to swallow his pride just to survive. I doubt he will simply melt away on a couch like his daddy, he will either be shanked in a dark alley as an easy mark or die from a violent heart attack/drug induced stroke when his body has enough. Will he want to get anywhere near a IP2 content streamer? Absolutely not, but he simply will not have a choice by that point in time if he wants to survive, and we all know he's too much of a coward to kill himself. This will be the absolute last resort option, we will have to see just how much more he can scrape the bottom of the barrel first. I have a feeling this Columbia trip was his last chance to try and salvage his stay in South America, with that tits up he will be more desperate than ever before.

Ethan Oliver Ralph

I don't know who that is, sir. We're talking about a farm animal here.

 

[Oliver Onions]

To be honest I'm split on if he lost them or he got mugged cause he's such an obvious mark.

The smart money is on him either losing, breaking or leaving them somewhere while he's shitface drunk and staggering back to whatever cardboard box he's calling home for the night.

Don't know if it'd count as mugging but I can also see some enterprising locals stealing his phone after they notice he's too fucked up to realise or stop them.

 

[Xev]

So the amount he saves on rent just gets spent on plane tickets and tijuana hookers?

 

[AltisticRight]

How does this retard pig lose his stuff each time he goes outside?
How is "getting back home" something a person needs to work on? Like nigga book a ticket and get back home??
???????

Retarded fucking pig at the age of over 40 while functionally being 13. Maybe that's why he whacked his needle to Soph.

 

[Near]

Did anyone keep a counter of how many phones this retard lost?

Do you think he just buys the cheapest ones he can find now in preparation for the inevitable?

 

[FiveStarAce]

How does this retard pig lose his stuff each time he goes outside?
How is "getting back home" something a person needs to work on? Like nigga book a ticket and get back home??
???????

Retarded fucking pig at the age of over 40 while functionally being 13. Maybe that's why he whacked his needle to Soph.

13 year olds can absolutely manage complicated public transportation with a little bit of help. Ralph on the other hand is so fried, he would probably qualify for a Spot in a caretakers home for mentally handicapped. Come to think of it, that would probably be the true ralphalife. Getting drugged to the gills and blabbering into a toy phone, while the house puts all the costs on his credit card, like a true and honest model citizen anno 2025.

 

[newuser131]

IP2 is completely out since he mouth raped Alice.

ip2, literally, has aids. if alice had bleeding gums when ralph mouth raped her, ralph as aids.

ralph lost a lot of weight since he has been in mexico. we know ralph as no discipline, so there is only one explanation.....

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

13 year olds can absolutely manage complicated public transportation with a little bit of help. Ralph on the other hand is so fried, he would probably qualify for a Spot in a caretakers home for mentally handicapped. Come to think of it, that would probably be the true ralphalife. Getting drugged to the gills and blabbering into a toy phone, while the house puts all the costs on his credit card, like a true and honest model citizen anno 2025.

Correct. When I was that age I managed a train>plane>connecting flight>shuttle>train trip and I was fine.

 

[Truly Rural]

Yeah. Rly makes u think. Doing the "wallet, keys, phone" check is standard male behavior. Now Ralph gets a pass since he's a BPD woman, but he's definitely the type to always have his phone in hand. Always. Im

I'm under the impression he has his debit and credit cards linked with his phone. If that's the case, he's even more retarded for the fact losing his phone(s) happens on a damn near monthly basis.

Thats exactly what I think as well, but in that case there wouldn't be room for "maybe stolen maybe left behind" bs. If he didn't take his phone he would have known for sure. Tbh I think he just took all the cash he had access to and spent it before he got the ticket back, and stolen phone is just a convenient excuse why he had to beg for ticket.

 

[FiveStarAce]

How the fuck is he tweeting without a phone?

 

[AncientPhosphur]

How the fuck is he tweeting without a phone?

He had his laptop for streaming in Colombia (he only did the one stream). Must of lost it after all those creep shots of Tijuana hookers

 

[sufferhorse]

every time he has to smuggle drugs and sex workers from merida to tijuana, he ends up losing his devices... wonder why

 

[Johnny Doxville]

He had his laptop for streaming in Colombia (he only did the one stream). Must of lost it after all those creep shots of Tijuana hookers

Getting his phone slapped out his hand for taking creep shots of hookers is on brand for ralph. That or he gets robbed.

 

[Some Fucking Retard]

How many phones has this retard lost at this point?

 

[HackerX]

His options will dwindle, and he will have to swallow his pride just to survive.

I don't know if that's possible.

I doubt he will simply melt away on a couch like his daddy

Like father, like son.

Did anyone keep a counter of how many phones this retard lost?

Do you think he just buys the cheapest ones he can find now in preparation for the inevitable?

That'd be an idea for a thread. List of things Ralph has lost.

Off the top of my head:

At least 3 phones, probably 10
Passport
YouTube channel
Blog
Wife
Truck
Wrasslin' belt

Yeah, there'd need to be a differentiation between things that were "lost" and things he simply doesn't have anymore, but that list would blow up REAL fast.