Horrorcow Andrew Ditch / Andy Ditch / The Poopsquatch - Middle-aged diaper and scat enthusiast. Pretends to be autistic so that people will change his diapers.

[pooterino]

He was probably asking the female nurses to, 'feel if he's wet,' but a male nurse did it instead.

Ab-so-lutely. Men are still pretty uncommon in the nursing field (not as much as 30 years ago but it's still heavily weighted towards women) and I've been told by friends that they love when they have a male nurse/LPN/CNA/whatever on a floor when there is some lecherous (and usually old) male patient around. Some of these creeps will even soil themselves with a little bit of piss in order to need a change and you can see (so I'm told) them go through several stages of grief with their facial expressions the instant some guy walks into their rooms casually throwing on a new pair of exam gloves to help a brother out with fresh undies and pants.

No hard-ons for you today, mister. Just a six foot tall beardo looking at you funny because you pissed on yourself. And I love that for Baby Amdy. He should get only male staff help 100% of the time.

 

[Coily the Spring Sprite]

He was probably asking the female nurses to, 'feel if he's wet,' but a male nurse did it instead.

He was only 12 at the time so there was still hope for him. Besides it probably never happened since he doesn't bring it up any more.

 

[Aunt Carol]

some guy walks into their rooms casually throwing on a new pair of exam gloves to help a brother out with fresh undies and pants.

Not just that, but there's a weird phenomenon where independent adult males develop the inability to put their penis into a urinal the second they enter a hospital room. Not talking men with a buried penis and abdominal obesity, or men post CABG or shoulder surgery, just ambulatory adult men with jobs who drive and play golf etc. There's a little Andy Ditch in a lot of people out there, more so than you'd want to think.

If you don't have a male staff member around, best practice is to scoop up their penis with the lip of the urinal, like you're scooping poop out of a litter box. If they don't resolve, pass on the penis difficulties in bedside report, ideally when family is present.

 

[Yamcha's Only Fan]

Now this is an interesting video. Around 10 minutes in Andy tells a story about being molested by a male nurse. The nurse "gently petted my special area". He then ran screaming without a diaper, punched a teacher then broke her ribs with a kick. Then went to ECMC and told everyone "I had sex today". This is one of the stories that he gave up on over the years.

https://archive.org/details/babyandyarchive/I+am+no+longer+interested+in+eating+or+drinking+because+I+want+help-_7NlHNro1TU.mp4#

the first thing he says is "I have no interest in food." and I'm already having a hard time wondering how he thought anyone would look at him and think he misses meals.

Not just that, but there's a weird phenomenon where independent adult males develop the inability to put their penis into a urinal the second they enter a hospital room. Not talking men with a buried penis and abdominal obesity, or men post CABG or shoulder surgery, just ambulatory adult men with jobs who drive and play golf etc. There's a little Andy Ditch in a lot of people out there, more so than you'd want to think.

If you don't have a male staff member around, best practice is to scoop up their penis with the lip of the urinal, like you're scooping poop out of a litter box. If they don't resolve, pass on the penis difficulties in bedside report, ideally when family is present.

Considering how most hospitals are full of bloodsucking parasites, I would think the hospital would be like "Oh you can't piss all the sudden? Well we better run another gambit of long, invasive, and most of all expensive tests."

 

[Banquet Meal]

where independent adult males develop the inability to put their penis into a urinal the second they enter a hospital room

not to overshare *i guess i am, whatever* but i worked as a "sitter" for years, at various hospitals, and OH MY GOD. the amount of men who wanted me to wipe their asses, clean their dicks, everything that i know they could do on their own..i refused, i told them that my job was to "promote independence", and hand them a wash cloth and soap, whatever...it was so gross. i was always thankful for a male cna on the floor to deal with this bullshit, for sure. i do not miss that job.

 

[Yamcha's Only Fan]

not to overshare *i guess i am, whatever* but i worked as a "sitter" for years, at various hospitals, and OH MY GOD. the amount of men who wanted me to wipe their asses, clean their dicks, everything that i know they could do on their own..i refused, i told them that my job was to "promote independence", and hand them a wash cloth and soap, whatever...it was so gross. i was always thankful for a male cna on the floor to deal with this bullshit, for sure. i do not miss that job.

good for you. Honestly sounds like you're in a better place than you were then.
And if sharing is the present topic...
This actually reminds me of something I saw ages ago. We used to have a pizza buffet and once in a while I actually saw some group home people there. One guy was in retrospect very similar to andy. Shaved head, +400 lbs, cartoon shirt. Dude polished off a whole large pizza and was ready to go back for more but the wrangler had to stop him. Dude was a real retard, drooled on his plate, stared off into space, had to be led by the hand, and could not tell if he was full. Pretty sure he also had nasty BO because when he passed he smelled awful.
He didn't throw fits, didn't say a word, just moved through his time there like a dog being handed a food bowl. Looking back on this person, he seems like everything Andy claims he is. Non communicative, barely capable of following basic instructions, IQ around room temperature, no impulse control and needs constant supervision.
The difference being I feel a certain amount of pity for that man, and none for our little poopsquatch.

 

[Amewsed]

Now this is an interesting video. Around 10 minutes in Andy tells a story about being molested by a male nurse. The nurse "gently petted my special area". He then ran screaming without a diaper, punched a teacher then broke her ribs with a kick. Then went to ECMC and told everyone "I had sex today". This is one of the stories that he gave up on over the years.

https://archive.org/details/babyandyarchive/I+am+no+longer+interested+in+eating+or+drinking+because+I+want+help-_7NlHNro1TU.mp4#

He's such a fake. This is his level 1 autism voice.

I've never seen a lolcow so intent on trying to convince am audience of something that's been so thoroughly disproven.

 

[JumpingJackFash]

Where is the creature now? Please tell me he isn't living in the house again. Tom and Joe couldn't possibly have allowed that thing to move back in with them. They owe Andy NOTHING. I'm sorry, I have all the sympathy in the world for Janet but she had no right to ask them to take care of Andrew. Enough is enough. Joe is old and frail and deserves peace in whatever time he has left in this world. They don't deserve a life trapped with that monster. Please tell me they didn't take him back in.

 

[King Metalia]

Ab-so-lutely. Men are still pretty uncommon in the nursing field (not as much as 30 years ago but it's still heavily weighted towards women) and I've been told by friends that they love when they have a male nurse/LPN/CNA/whatever on a floor when there is some lecherous (and usually old) male patient around. Some of these creeps will even soil themselves with a little bit of piss in order to need a change and you can see (so I'm told) them go through several stages of grief with their facial expressions the instant some guy walks into their rooms casually throwing on a new pair of exam gloves to help a brother out with fresh undies and pants.

No hard-ons for you today, mister. Just a six foot tall beardo looking at you funny because you pissed on yourself. And I love that for Baby Amdy. He should get only male staff help 100% of the time.

The only way you could make that situation funnier is to have the nurse be a large black gentleman. I'm now picturing Andy's horrified face when he sees his nurse is the Booty Warrior from the Boondocks.

 

[Amewsed]

Where is the creature now? Please tell me he isn't living in the house again. Tom and Joe couldn't possibly have allowed that thing to move back in with them. They owe Andy NOTHING. I'm sorry, I have all the sympathy in the world for Janet but she had no right to ask them to take care of Andrew. Enough is enough. Joe is old and frail and deserves peace in whatever time he has left in this world. They don't deserve a life trapped with that monster. Please tell me they didn't take him back in.

As far as we all know, the faker is still in the royal facility buzin his caretakers with shit and piss filled diapers so he can get his rocks off.

 

[JumpingJackFash]

Imagine Andy's meltdown if Joe ever went in for an autism diagnosis and it turned out Joe was the one on the spectrum all this time. God I would love that just to see that fat blubbering turd sucker meltdown and smash his head on the sidewalk like an old melon.

 

[Yamcha's Only Fan]

Now this is an interesting video. Around 10 minutes in Andy tells a story about being molested by a male nurse. The nurse "gently petted my special area". He then ran screaming without a diaper, punched a teacher then broke her ribs with a kick. Then went to ECMC and told everyone "I had sex today". This is one of the stories that he gave up on over the years.

https://archive.org/details/babyandyarchive/I+am+no+longer+interested+in+eating+or+drinking+because+I+want+help-_7NlHNro1TU.mp4#

I'm working my way through this video and fuck you for all the new diseases and medical stuff I gotta add to my list.

But the part where he says the conners group home had him stand naked on a big absorbent sheet in some common area like the untrained animal he is was pretty funny.

"I was in testing for a pacemaker device for my bladder control issues!" HAHAHA

 

[JumpingJackFash]

I'm working my way through this video and fuck you for all the new diseases and medical stuff I gotta add to my list.

But the part where he says the conners group home had him stand naked on a big absorbent sheet in some common area like the untrained animal he is was pretty funny.

"I was in testing for a pacemaker device for my bladder control issues!" HAHAHA

17:40 I AM PURPOSEFULLY SHITTING MY DIAPERS!
Spends the whole video screaming about how he's so inept, sickly and too dumb to function, then turns around and say he's smart and doesn't need anything.

I love how that bullshit retard voice and fake ticks vanish when he gets pissed off enough and you get a glimpse of the evil vindictive cunt he really is. He's not autistic, he's just an comically evil pervert protected by a overly permissive society.

 

[Yamcha's Only Fan]

I love how that bullshit retard voice and fake ticks vanish when he gets pissed off enough and you get a glimpse of the evil vindictive cunt he really is. He's not autistic, he's just an comically evil pervert protected by a overly permissive society.

Yup.
In this video you can hear when he talked about his mom you can see it if you read between the lines. He gives the tired "My mom advocated for me and worked with me, I love her so much" story, but then he says "but then she got sick and couldn't do it anymore." But.. he sounds mad when he says that last part. And then when you factor in the shit he did to his mom (the oil diffuser, pulling knives on her, turning the lights off) then it it clicks.

All the shit he did to his mom was vengeance. He wasn't just doing it to be an evil little dick. he was trying to punish his mom for not babying him enough like when he was 12. then the poisonings make sense. He was trying to kill his dad for petty little BS.

The fucker really is a real life eric cartman.

 

[JumpingJackFash]

Yup.
In this video you can hear when he talked about his mom you can see it if you read between the lines. He gives the tired "My mom advocated for me and worked with me, I love her so much" story, but then he says "but then she got sick and couldn't do it anymore." But.. he sounds mad when he says that last part. And then when you factor in the shit he did to his mom (the oil diffuser, pulling knives on her, turning the lights off) then it it clicks.

All the shit he did to his mom was vengeance. He wasn't just doing it to be an evil little dick. he was trying to punish his mom for not babying him enough like when he was 12. then the poisonings make sense. He was trying to kill his dad for petty little BS.

The fucker really is a real life eric cartman.

Evil isn't always how you picture it. It doesn't always have horns or cloven hooves. It doesn't dwell in a castle in Transylvania in a flowing black cloak sucking the blood of the living. Sometimes evil comes in the form of an obese perverted sociopath in a soiled diaper clutching a teddy bear and screaming about a group home while his elderly mother cowers and weeps.

 

[Ilabelle21]

Imagine Andy's meltdown if Joe ever went in for an autism diagnosis and it turned out Joe was the one on the spectrum all this time. God I would love that just to see that fat blubbering turd sucker meltdown and smash his head on the sidewalk like an old melon.

I would 100% believe if Joe, or even Tom, had autism. Their speech mannerisms remind me a lot of some of the autists I know in real life. (And I know several).

Andy's, on the other hand, reminds me of some of the BPDs and schizophrenics I've worked with (church volunteer work) — namely the almost, 'slurred,' manner of speech (granted he's also using so many pills), and the forced baby talk.

 

[anliteralidiot]

Hand to god, I read that Joe has Asperger's.

 

[twinArmageddons]

Hand to god, I read that Joe has Asperger's.

If joe did have aspergers would andy try to pull a chris and say his autism is more superior than his?

 

[anliteralidiot]

If joe did have aspergers would andy try to pull a chris and say his autism is more superior than his?

Absolutely, that's why Andy's is a level 3.

 

[Switzing]

If joe did have aspergers would andy try to pull a chris and say his autism is more superior than his?

i think andy would have no clue what aspergers is and think its a seperate thing from autism.
would be funny to see him say "yeah, i think i also have aspergers, i think i have both"