Ian stinks. Really bad. Straight up BO. One of the worst smelling people I've ever had to sit next to. Walking behind him? You're getting a wiff.
To clarify, he stunk when we went out with them. Not in a gym setting.
HE SHITS HIS PANTS
HES BROKE
HE STINKS
This says so much about him.
I can remember from a fairly young age, like late elementary/middle school, being self conscious in a good, healthy, way about not stinking.
For most people it should only take one instance of being near someone who stinks in public during their formative years to make the developmental decision to avoid being that.
Add to that coming of the age when girls go from icky to attractive, well there's a reason middle school locker rooms absolutely reek of axe and other such body sprays. Not to mention that being an age when gum and breath mint sales spike. (Anyone else remember Smints?)
For Ian to make it to his 30s, firmly in adult territory, and still have the odor profile of the special education department is astonishing. It tells me he either never learned to be self conscious about it or he gave up after being married, and the established fact that he was an actual incel until his mid twenties points to the former.
Furthermore his IBS isn't an excuse. A responsible intelligent adult adapts to a chronic medical condition and gains control over it, not the other way around. You don't just go "whoops I shit my pants again, oh well" you take preventative action to avoid it as best you can and be prepared to react if it happens anyway. If it's really that bad then accept your fate and wear some fucking depends. Sure adult diapers are embarrassing but far less embarrassing than doing nothing about your chronically shat pants. Besides if it's a legitimate medical condition then people making fun of you for dealing with it become the assholes. You don't make fun of a cancer patient for being bald or having to wear a wig.
I remember seeing a post in this thread that compared Ian to Theon Greyjoy but now we know he's 100% Reek.
Uh oh, stinky.