Favorite Lolcow traits?

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Killbot 2000 said:
I think hotdiggety demon was the master at making people tardrage, especially bronies.
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Heh heh, I loved those videos.

2 traits I've always enjoyed about lolcows.

1. They never learn. It's fascinating to watch these people make the same mistakes for years on end. Don't want people sharing your personal information? Then stop posting it. Yet this doesn't sink in. It's fascinating and refreshing to watch an exercise in futility that doesn't know how to stop damaging itself.

2nd has to be their fighting spirit. Every one of them when attacked gets this mindset that "I'm going to be the guy who takes down Anonymous. Len takes it to a weird conspiracy level, and Chris thought he could fight the world. It's ambitious, futile, and hilarious. I love it.
 
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1. Shit art.
2. Horrible tempers.
3. Coming up with weird words/phases that make no sense (like CWC-isms)
4. Awful fashion sense.
 
Shit art / art that's enjoyable for reasons the creator did not intend
Sperging about trivial things
Being paranoid about trolls
 
Based on what others have said in this thread and from what I've seen, if there was a single person who was an amalgam of all lolcows, this "super lolcow" would probably have:

- no current job or volunteer work and no real work history
- brown hair
- a bad temper
- an autism spectrum disorder
- learning difficulties
- an odd way of speaking
- white non-Hispanic ethnicity (but possibly identifies as a nonwhite &/or Hispanic person)
- a stereotypically "white-sounding" name
- a male gender (but possibly identifies as female)
- glasses sometimes called "pedo glasses"
- obesity
- poor health (especially dental)
- a crappy diet
- an age somewhere over 18-21
- their room in their parents' house somewhere in the eastern USA
- an obsession with TV (especially with media primarily marketed towards children)
- an obsession with the 90s
- an obsession with high school or college
- other unusual obsessions
- trouble(s) with the law
- troubles with artistic skill and creativity
- a desire to make it big despite said troubles with skill and creativity
- issues with racism (particularly against black people) and/or antisemitism
- no real romantic history
- possible toilet-related issues, like :briefs: or storing pee in jars
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ToroidalBoat said:
Based on what others have said in this thread and from what I've seen, if there was a single person who was an amalgam of all lolcows, this "super lolcow" would probably have:
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-lying
-spends money on ridiculous crap
-has atleast one mental disorder
 
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ToroidalBoat said:
Based on what others have said in this thread and from what I've seen, if there was a single person who was an amalgam of all lolcows, this "super lolcow" would probably have:
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I'd add:
- Some kind of fetish they're a little too open about
- In addition to actual mental health issues, at least one made-up mental or physical disorder
- Nude photos
 
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Flowers For Sonichu said:
Speaking about parents, there are plenty of people on the autism spectrum or have disabilities/mental health problems who are functional members of society that don't make an ass of themselves on the internet.
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That couldn't be further from the truth. Powerlevel: My parents did everything they could do, and I still failed.
 
I like how some lolcows have an incredibly short fuse for anger and the resulting explosive chimpouts are film worthy.
 
Personally, a lolcows attempts to embark on a moral crusade to cover up their past crimes is the most amusing. For example. furries who will campaign against pedos in order to make their zoophilic tendencies seem less horrible in comparison.
 
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