- Joined
- Apr 15, 2014
Well gamers, I manged to snag a PDF of an obscure and terrible RPG by the name of Wraeththu, which I've heard is one of the most terrible, mind numbingly bad RPGs ever produced. As this is a forum dedicated to terrible, mind numbingly bad things, as soon as I saw this in a /tg/ repository and realized just what the fuck it was, I knew I needed to read it for your viewing "pleasure". After all, we already have a thread on FATAL, so why not another obscure, terrible game.
So, without further ado, I give you
Randall Reads a Terrible RPG
Part 1 (What the fuck is a wraethulhu?)
So, our cover is a deviantart picture of a knife, a flower, an unpronounceable name, and the phrase "from enchantment to fulfillment"
. This is also part of a "Wraethulu Mythos" or something. This certainly bodes well.
Right off the bat we get a few things
audience of this book:
So, the first part of the damn book is about a fat high school incel who's bullied by those mean old Chad Thundercocks. So, basically the self insert of the writers of this book. There's a text wall of self pity and loathing about how gosh darn unfair high school is, darn sadistic bullies, being too smart, blah blah blah. Also life sucks and a bunch of people are randomly going missing but the police don't care because dystopia or something.
Anyway, Whiny Fag gets jumped by mean old Chad Thundercock and his goons, who are all popular jocks doing the booze and tobaky so you know they're bad guys. They decide to abduct Whiny Fag for one-dimensional villain antics.
So, Chad Tundercock and the Cockettes take Whiny Fag to the Rape Basement across town, where they try to sell him to an 80s Glam Rocker. Glam Rocker says that Chad Thundercock and the Cockettes will "most assuredly get what he deserves". Oblivious to the fact that Glam Rocker is blatantly telling him that he's going to backstab him, Chad does some generic villain gloating before getting backstabbed.
Anyway, Whiny Fag gets turned into an 80s Glam Rocker via Glam Rocker blood transfusion, and goes from a fat incel to a lithe androgynous feg. There's a monologue about how "humanities time is done" and how the Glam Rockers are the next stage of evolution or some dumb shit like that. Whiny Fag is has been assimilated into the Glam Rocker horde, and can only talk in edgy soliloquies. Also, his name is now "Boline, the blade that will usher in a new world". 
So, that was the first chapter of this thing. Already we have learned
We actually get some sort of explanation for what the fuck this is, and have the concept of "roleplaying" explained to us like children. yaaay.
So, without further ado, I give you
Randall Reads a Terrible RPG
Part 1 (What the fuck is a wraethulhu?)


- This is based of a series of books with titles that sound like Linkin Park lyrics, written by a Storm Constantine. Who is credited with authorship of this book, which makes it a TRUE AND HONEST official product.
- The knife on cover image is from United Cutlery, as is "for ornamental purposed only", and is not recommended for use as a game prop. Something about the mental image of a bunch of Wraethulhu larpers running around with knives, inadvertently stabbing each other, and then crying that "the rulebook didn't tell us knives were for ornamental purposes only" is hilarious to me.
- They needed to include a disclaimer that everything in this book is fictional and that Wraethuthu don't exist in the real world and you cannot "incept" anyone into becoming a Wreaththu. Given that they thought their target audience needed to be reminded of this, I have high hopes for the rest of the book.
audience of this book:


Anyway, Whiny Fag gets jumped by mean old Chad Thundercock and his goons, who are all popular jocks doing the booze and tobaky so you know they're bad guys. They decide to abduct Whiny Fag for one-dimensional villain antics.






- This is a blatant wish fulfillment for the authors.
- The authors think the target audience are fat incels who want to be androgynous glam rockers
- Chad Thundercock sells people to Glam Rockers caus humans are evil
- High school for autistics is basically the holocaust, and the autistics are the jews
We actually get some sort of explanation for what the fuck this is, and have the concept of "roleplaying" explained to us like children. yaaay.