Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Particle Bored]

He's serious you guys. You don't want to be a jellyfish do you?View attachment 435528

According to a prestigious 2015 study, jellyfish have the longest telomeres of all.

 

[Junkail]

He's serious you guys. You don't want to be a jellyfish do you?View attachment 435528

I'd say were more like a Portuguese man-of-war, a creature made of collective, venomous polyps that gives unsuspecting people burning, painful welts.

This guy never learns, does he?

 

[IrishAsylum]

Looks like Bitch Tits has a new youtube channel! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCY6Q17BU9kx6DokApfyUe9w

First up "The World Will Have To Change" but then talks about how there's no choice or free will. So can us peons change anything? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvPxctb53Fk

Next "First Date" humblebrags about his small studio apartment and his 1K "nest egg" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEI8bcILbjE&t=2s

Finally "How Aren't You A Bigot" yet again comparing his not touching vag to "faygits" being killed. And you owe him an apology! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKgDhN9ecME

Edit - Sorry, apparently I'm too exceptional to upload videos correctly.

 

[DeletedSoul]

Looks like Bitch Tits has a new youtube channel! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCY6Q17BU9kx6DokApfyUe9w

First up "The World Will Have To Change" but then talks about how there's no choice or free will. So can us peons change anything? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvPxctb53Fk

Next "First Date" humblebrags about his small studio apartment and his 1K "nest egg" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEI8bcILbjE&t=2s

Finally "How Aren't You A Bigot" yet again comparing his not touching vag to "faygits" being killed. And you owe him an apology! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKgDhN9ecME

Edit - Sorry, apparently I'm too exceptional to upload videos correctly.

Gerard got a rage boner at the last one, because just a couple of weeks ago he used Matthew Shepard's story to caution Lucas against spewing homophobic bullshit. Like, "this is what Matthew went through, you should think twice before cracking homophobic jokes."

So naturally Lucas's takeaway was that getting rejected by girls half his age is comparable to being beaten and tortured and left for dead.

And Gerard's response to Lucas resulted in Lucas finally blocking him.

It's really breathtaking how horrible Lucas can be sometimes. Like, times like these are really good and important reminders that he is beyond redemption or sympathy.

 

[Stamos]

This new note-consulting Lucas is even more unsettling than before. Something about him reading "babe" and imagining that he not only wrote it down first but also possibly reread it before filming and still thought it was a good idea gives me the creeps. (I know "creep" is basically like the n-word to Lucas, but if the shoe fits.)

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Someone on Twitter made one of the dick picks that Lucas sent to Corina in to a meme.
Fair warning: penis ahead

Spoiler

Edit: he also has a new YouTube channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCY6Q17BU9kx6DokApfyUe9w

 

[Tracy Martel]

There is no such thing as "gourmet sushi" in Spokane. It's too far from Seattle to get reliable fresh fish for anything above average to above-average quality. There are no restaurants that serve anything close to "gourmet sushi" so I love the fact that the Wern is always talking about sushi when I know for a fact he's getting California Rolls from sports bars and considering it "High Dining".

 

[NimertiS]

Someone on Twitter made one of the dick picks that Lucas sent to Corina in to a meme.
Fair warning: penis ahead

Spoiler

Edit: he also has a new YouTube channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCY6Q17BU9kx6DokApfyUe9w

Why all pedos on the internet have smol benis? Amazing Atheist, Wern, that horrorcow who raped a 9 year old and I don't remember his name. They think in they sick mind that adult women need bigger size so they must turn to ACTUAL children?

 

[Tracy Martel]

Why all pedos on the internet have smol benis? Amazing Atheist, Wern, that horrorcow who raped a 9 year old and I don't remember his name. They think in they sick mind that adult women need bigger size so they must turn to ACTUAL children?

Pure speculation, but, correlation of small dick size and obesity may link to low self confidence and the inability to find and attract mates, thus causing more desperate men to seek sexual satisfaction in much broader and less ethical areas?

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

Why all pedos on the internet have smol benis? Amazing Atheist, Wern, that horrorcow who raped a 9 year old and I don't remember his name. They think in they sick mind that adult women need bigger size so they must turn to ACTUAL children?

Pure speculation, but, correlation of small dick size and obesity may link to low self confidence and the inability to find and attract mates, thus causing more desperate men to seek sexual satisfaction in much broader and less ethical areas?

You two are vastly over thinking Lucas’ small dick and his love for young girls. It’s cause he wants to fuck kids and has a small dick.

 

[Diabeetus]

Why all pedos on the internet have smol benis?

Because a child's asshole is the only thing they can fuck without feeling insecure with their microbenis.

 

[Kugelsak Kastengrus 6th]

-dick sniplet-

I doubt he can even blame shrinkage for his micro peen. Otherwise he'd have to fish it out with a pair of tongs that he'll probably use in his cooking. But in all seriousness, the anger he displays is very similar to G.G. Allin.

 

[Tracy Martel]

I doubt he can even blame shrinkage for his micro peen. Otherwise he'd have to fish it out with a pair of tongs that he'll probably use in his cooking. But in all seriousness, the anger he displays is very similar to G.G. Allin.

But G.G. Allin was somewhat self aware of his anger and the reasons behind it. He knew about how to mock it up even more to fuck with crowds to sell tickets. Allin was actually kind of an intellectual with the emotional drive of a ferocious animal.

The Wern is totally unable to reflect on himself at all. He has no ability to detect that he's being insane, he's totally convinced that he is right.

Not that I wouldn't want to see The Wern roll around in shit on stage screaming about Telomeres as the cops desperately try to kick him off the stage while he's cutting himself open.

A man can dream.

 

[Bassomatic]

I wonder how much of this new YT is due to trolling from Tosh viewers and hiding from his mental health care people.

I really fucking hate myself right now, and you all (not really <3 fam) but here we go, Lucas next pile of stupid vomit that comes out of his pedophile blubber hole.

Again these are not word for word recaps just a summary and me throwing my two cents in of autistic rage, pointing out plot holes, mockery and what ever musings escape in my mind while I endure the schizophrenia that is "the Wern" Also for once Lucas isn't changing shirts for each ramble.

The world will have to change : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvPxctb53Fk
Lucas says he's never met the age gap he wants, he will do this to end bigotry. He talks about we don't have free will because science, while there is a philosophy debate on this, i've never heard of because gravity we don't have choice. That's what Lucas point of view is. It shows his ignorance to both science and philosophy. We only have options, but not free will. There is a 5th dimension, women are most fertile younger men hit it in his range and older. Gen Z women and Gen X men are nature taking it's route. We are driven by entropy of the universe. This is nature, Gen Z and Gen X will give in and the world will change.

First date : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEI8bcILbjE
Lucas opens up with "I haven't had a job in 18 years" Collectively women of the world feel moist in their neither regions by this. He brags about eating out once or twice a week, then says he cooks at home too. He shows he doesn't understand how to eat healthy, and gorges. He likes his gravy, because he's a fatso. He does his own wash and dishes (his photos prove other wise) he's good at budgeting - a near 40 year old man living in a tard house. He has EBT. 770 a month + 140 on EBT. He has a small nest egg, of 1k. (let me money sperg here, for Lucas to retire middle class he'd have to have a rather strong market, put away 800 a month and hold off till 67 to max his SS 1k at his age is not a nest egg) He just got a smart phone and wastes his money buying board games. He is losing weight (lol no) He quit smoking after 20 years. Props given when due. He might go to college he wants a girl friend BITE ME! Steak dinner and a show seems like a first date idea. He ends wishing a good night.

How Aren't You A Bigot? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKgDhN9ecME
Why can't I compare agism to racism? Well one is real the other is a Lucasism. White people who have in group preference are racist. Women who won't date him are bigots. How isn't this as bad as racist or anti gay. He has 8 ex's he dated baby boomers. Lucas tells the Matthew Shepard lie. (Matt owed his drug dealers money and they didn't exactly want a faggot meth addict to pay with his mouth so they killed him it's well documented a junkie who happened to be gay became a fake outrage crying point for the LGBT) Lucas thinks of Matt Shepard when you call him a creep. If you call him a creep he may get violent. (Judging from Lucas attacking that other lolcow, no scare fatso creep) He claims you are a bigot and he's owed an apology. The video ends with out explaining why.

Words of Encouragement : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtEKUeXVNCM
Lucas autistically and in a very creepy way reads motivational sayings and greeting card slogans. What the fuck nigger.

Life is too short : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fudl8gZ9lDE
He is about making hookers legal, he says making pot legal has been good for WA. He won't get a hooker. He's not about that, not even a little bit. He wants a family (because you make really good life long bonds by sending dick pics out to someone you meet online.) Anyone in the way of his goal is an enemy. He demands to be cheered on by ALL he does if not you'll be blocked. Life is too short. He doesn't want a mail order bride because he can't afford one, but if he could he wouldn't want to be gold dug. He thinks calling a girl babe is sexy. He's a Democratic Socialist. He's into 18-25 year old girls and will strike when the irons hot referencing nothing. Marry them young read naive. Till then he'll be alone eating gourmet sushi. I'm glad he likes sushi because he's creepy and will be alone forever.


He's still reading notes, and he can't even make eye contact with the camera. I'm not sure if it's due to autism, him having social issues or just he can't be assed to remember his notes. Either way, Lucas is still batshit insane. He's doubling down as he's running short on time at his house pissing money away buying board games and eating out instead of saving for an apartment and home goods. Hobo Lucas saga won't be long now.

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

I wonder how much of this new YT is due to trolling from Tosh viewers and hiding from his mental health care people.

I really fucking hate myself right now, and you all (not really <3 fam) but here we go, Lucas next pile of stupid vomit that comes out of his pedophile blubber hole.

Again these are not word for word recaps just a summary and me throwing my two cents in of autistic rage, pointing out plot holes, mockery and what ever musings escape in my mind while I endure the schizophrenia that is "the Wern" Also for once Lucas isn't changing shirts for each ramble.

The world will have to change : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvPxctb53Fk
Lucas says he's never met the age gap he wants, he will do this to end bigotry. He talks about we don't have free will because science, while there is a philosophy debate on this, i've never heard of because gravity we don't have choice. That's what Lucas point of view is. It shows his ignorance to both science and philosophy. We only have options, but not free will. There is a 5th dimension, women are most fertile younger men hit it in his range and older. Gen Z women and Gen X men are nature taking it's route. We are driven by entropy of the universe. This is nature, Gen Z and Gen X will give in and the world will change.

First date : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEI8bcILbjE
Lucas opens up with "I haven't had a job in 18 years" Collectively women of the world feel moist in their neither regions by this. He brags about eating out once or twice a week, then says he cooks at home too. He shows he doesn't understand how to eat healthy, and gorges. He likes his gravy, because he's a fatso. He does his own wash and dishes (his photos prove other wise) he's good at budgeting - a near 40 year old man living in a tard house. He has EBT. 770 a month + 140 on EBT. He has a small nest egg, of 1k. (let me money sperg here, for Lucas to retire middle class he'd have to have a rather strong market, put away 800 a month and hold off till 67 to max his SS 1k at his age is not a nest egg) He just got a smart phone and wastes his money buying board games. He is losing weight (lol no) He quit smoking after 20 years. Props given when due. He might go to college he wants a girl friend BITE ME! Steak dinner and a show seems like a first date idea. He ends wishing a good night.

How Aren't You A Bigot? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKgDhN9ecME
Why can't I compare agism to racism? Well one is real the other is a Lucasism. White people who have in group preference are racist. Women who won't date him are bigots. How isn't this as bad as racist or anti gay. He has 8 ex's he dated baby boomers. Lucas tells the Matthew Shepard lie. (Matt owed his drug dealers money and they didn't exactly want a faggot meth addict to pay with his mouth so they killed him it's well documented a junkie who happened to be gay became a fake outrage crying point for the LGBT) Lucas thinks of Matt Shepard when you call him a creep. If you call him a creep he may get violent. (Judging from Lucas attacking that other lolcow, no scare fatso creep) He claims you are a bigot and he's owed an apology. The video ends with out explaining why.

Words of Encouragement : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtEKUeXVNCM
Lucas autistically and in a very creepy way reads motivational sayings and greeting card slogans. What the fuck nigger.

Life is too short : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fudl8gZ9lDE
He is about making hookers legal, he says making pot legal has been good for WA. He won't get a hooker. He's not about that, not even a little bit. He wants a family (because you make really good life long bonds by sending dick pics out to someone you meet online.) Anyone in the way of his goal is an enemy. He demands to be cheered on by ALL he does if not you'll be blocked. Life is too short. He doesn't want a mail order bride because he can't afford one, but if he could he wouldn't want to be gold dug. He thinks calling a girl babe is sexy. He's a Democratic Socialist. He's into 18-25 year old girls and will strike when the irons hot referencing nothing. Marry them young read naive. Till then he'll be alone eating gourmet sushi. I'm glad he likes sushi because he's creepy and will be alone forever.


He's still reading notes, and he can't even make eye contact with the camera. I'm not sure if it's due to autism, him having social issues or just he can't be assed to remember his notes. Either way, Lucas is still batshit insane. He's doubling down as he's running short on time at his house pissing money away buying board games and eating out instead of saving for an apartment and home goods. Hobo Lucas saga won't be long now.

If you lived by me I would take you out for some drinks. Thanks for summarizing his insane babble for those of us without the time to watch. Appreciate it dude.

Edit to add: actually DM me and if you do live close I can take you out for some drinks next week.

 

[Trainwreck]

Holy shit. He doesn't even look the same. I've had colds before.....but my face has never swelled.

There is no such thing as "gourmet sushi" in Spokane. It's too far from Seattle to get reliable fresh fish for anything above average to above-average quality. There are no restaurants that serve anything close to "gourmet sushi" so I love the fact that the Wern is always talking about sushi when I know for a fact he's getting California Rolls from sports bars and considering it "High Dining".

You are 100% correct. The place he goes to, The Wave, is very mediocre and it's even hit and miss on that. The one place that actually has really decent sushi, he doesn't even go to. There is a restaurant called Wisconsin Burger that is literally 3 blocks from where he lives that has great food and a younger crowd and he's never even thought to go there. He's a creepy creature of habit that sticks to the same things all the time.

 

[Rogowski]

Looks like Lucas had a good dinner going last night until he puked on it.

 

[IrishAsylum]

Holy shit. He doesn't even look the same. I've had colds before.....but my face has never swelled.

You are 100% correct. The place he goes to, The Wave, is very mediocre and it's even hit and miss on that. The one place that actually has really decent sushi, he doesn't even go to. There is a restaurant called Wisconsin Burger that is literally 3 blocks from where he lives that has great food and a younger crowd and he's never even thought to go there. He's a creepy creature of habit that sticks to the same things all the time.

What the fuck is up with eye????????????

 

[Bassomatic]

Looks like Lucas had a good dinner going last night until he puked on it. View attachment 435922

Pre chopped veg, 3 cutlets and oodles of what is either mayo or ranch on top and a couple kinds of things heavily dashed on, I assume spices but one being clear white is just salt. This is a food nightmare. I had left over pasta for lunch and ziti in meat sauce is not exactly pretty even more so coming out of tupper ware you know a meal I hide in my office and eat with out being since. Lucas may be the only cow I suggest Jack to for an upgrade lol.

Now to his new video. To Handle this Experience : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2If4zOguVD0

First before I start seriously, people aren't joking what the fuck happened to you Lucas? Get your ass to the doctors, this is a serious rash/infection/inflammation. I've seen people have serious anaphylactic issues look better, I'm not joking. One eye is nearly welded shut and he says he's been coughing yet feels fine. Hell that whole side of the face is swollen, look at his cheek. How the fuck are lolcows so immortal? Bless thee Papa Nurgle. Ok moving on. Lucas we rip on you for a lot of reasons, but you are on medicare so go see a doctor not joking. It's sad KF is the only place that's worried about your health.

Lucas lets us know he's been coughing. He's not sneezing so getting better with sleep trouble. Tosh and people like Tosh are attacking him online. People who are abusive, he doesn't like this. Lucas lists a few medical journals and talks about telomeres. Even though it could cause mental illness to have an older father, Lucas says it's impossible (himself being a perfect counter to this) Telomeres stop autism. Because, reasons. Dumb people have short telomeres. If you agree the father has longer telomeres then it can't cause mental illness. It's less a chance, so it means none. Also there are more to genes than telomeres. Mothers under 25, are twice as likely to have kids living to 100. It's telomeres I don't know why. But disagreeing is bigtory. I'll make more videos till you stop being a bigot. Educating people can change minds. Racism is still around and signs of low IQ. (Jared Taylor has a MS from an Ivy League Lucas eats off the floor) Changing someone's life can change outlook. Lucas could be a right winger if he was different. If blacks picked on him since he's smart he'd still be a liberal. His brain might be different if he was in a different way. Liberals are hopeful, conservatives are fearful. (political standing aside I'm scared as fuck as what ever xenomorph is using Lucas as a host.) He offers a dinner at Churchills' you know the steak house he's banned from? He wants a girl friend someone to hang with 18-25 only. He wants kids and science says your his best friend. Women just aren't mature enough for him.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Lucas' voice is actually more bearable when he's sick imho. He seems to have lost the low, creepy drawl and even his lisp is less pronounced.