Cooking with Kat (and DSP) thread

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Oh no, not store-bought chicken!
If Kat really loved Phil she'd behead, pluck, and clean a live chicken right in the kitchen.

ya the sauce and shells would be the only thing i would make homemade, fuck the rest. and her food doesnt look too bad. better her than phils. dumbass using metal on teflon, wouldnt trust him to make me fkin toast
 
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ya the sauce and shells would be the only thing i would make homemade, fuck the rest. and her food doesnt look too bad. better her than phils. dumbass using metal on teflon, wouldnt trust him to make me fkin toast
Funny you'd say toast; he when making an egg sandwich dropped a pair of bread slices onto his dirty floor. He touched it with his raw bacon hand, put it back on the pile and used it to make three sandwiches, which is WTF even for me.

You don't need three sandwiches. One or two should do. Maybe with a side like hashbrowns Phil.
 
Funny you'd say toast; he when making an egg sandwich dropped a pair of bread slices onto his dirty floor. He touched it with his raw bacon hand, put it back on the pile and used it to make three sandwiches, which is WTF even for me.

You don't need three sandwiches. One or two should do. Maybe with a side like BIG, BLACK DICK Phil.

So many memes from that video: 'I don't have time to melt butter, I'M A GAMER!'; Bacon grease goes in the toilet; Scraping a non-stick pan with a metal spatula; dropping food on the floor and still eating it. . .and just so horrifying :cryblood:

"I'm sure it's 5 billion calories" actually Dave it's 1,100 calories of mostly fat, excess protein, and simple carbohydrates with almost no micronutrients.
 
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So many memes from that video: 'I don't have time to melt butter, I'M A GAMER!'; Bacon grease goes in the toilet; Scraping a non-stick pan with a metal spatula; dropping food on the floor and still eating it. . .and just so horrifying :cryblood:

"I'm sure it's 5 billion calories" actually Dave it's 1,100 calories of mostly fat, excess protein, and simple carbohydrates with almost no micronutrients.

"ive seen ppl try to flip their eggs with a fork, dont do that. you look stupid" shit you not i choked up and laughed for like 5mins. the fucking irony
"i dont like frying cause i cant clean the pan, thats cause youre an idiot"

says the guy STILL using metal on teflon.

god, what a large breakfast. what a fat fuck. and its all grease and fat and shit. lol he posts it even after doing multiple things wrong, dropping bread on the floor and now even saying EATING RAW BACON. holy jesus fucking christ, this guy needs to stop before he gets some idiot killed for listening to this fucking tool


i honestly want to ask dsp for an honest answer, why he loves making a fool of himself online
 
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"ive seen ppl try to flip their eggs with a fork, dont do that. you look stupid" shit you not i choked up and laughed for like 5mins. the fucking irony
"i dont like frying cause i cant clean the pan, thats cause youre an idiot"

says the guy STILL using metal on teflon.

god, what a large breakfast. what a fat fuck. and its all grease and fat and shit. lol he posts it even after doing multiple things wrong, dropping bread on the floor and now even saying EATING RAW BACON. holy jesus fucking christ, this guy needs to stop before he gets some idiot killed for listening to this fucking tool


i honestly want to ask dsp for an honest answer, why he loves making a fool of himself online

If you're getting a chuckle out of these that was the very first episode of 'Poorly Cooking with the King', his title, that he made. In his second episode you get to see his advanced egg whisking technique, and the metal spatula is still featured.

In the 3rd episode, still featuring the metal spatula scraping on a non-stick pan, he shows you how to cook frozen pre-cooked hamburgers with pre-cooked microwaveable bacon. He decides to have 2 quarter pounders, with nothing else, for dinner.

In episode 4 he makes more goddamn bacon with American cheese, white bread, and eggs. . .at fucking midnight; but this time substituting a plastic spatula, that he had the whole time, without a word as if it was his idea. He refers to this dish as healthy, based off the idea that it's possible to add vegetables or tomato to it.

In episode 5 again the pastic spatula appears, where he fucks up making tuna salad, pretends he didn't throw away the extra tuna salad, and gets tuna salad all over his panini grill to make a tuna melt that he. . .very likely throws away.

In episode 7 he fails at making an omelet featuring his unique whisking style(I'm pretty sure he's mentally disabled). He also specifically sets the metal and plastic spatula out on the stove as he plans to call his fans whiners and idiots because his NPD requires him to tell them he knows what the fuck he's doing and is right. . .he then precedes to burn the fuck out of his omelet while making the middle still runny and not melt the cheese :stress:

Thus l present to you 'The Spatula Saga' :story:

Edit: Oh, also @Lurkette this channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGzoMBBrEusFHBWhXmBQfFw/videos?disable_polymer=1 has Episodes 1 - 8 of 'Poorly Cooking with the King' which were all off TheKingOfHateHD.
 
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If you're getting a chuckle out of these that was the very first episode of 'Poorly Cooking with the King', his title, that he made. In his second episode you get to see his advanced egg whisking technique, and the metal spatula is still featured.

In the 3rd episode, still featuring the metal spatula scraping on a non-stick pan, he shows you how to cook frozen pre-cooked hamburgers with pre-cooked microwaveable bacon. He decides to have 2 quarter pounders, with nothing else, for dinner.

In episode 4 he makes more goddamn bacon with American cheese, white bread, and eggs. . .at fucking midnight; but this time substituting a plastic spatula, that he had the whole time, without a word as if it was his idea. He refers to this dish as healthy, based off the idea that it's possible to add vegetables or tomato to it.

In episode 5 again the pastic spatula appears, where he fucks up making tuna salad, pretends he didn't throw away the extra tuna salad, and gets tuna salad all over his panini grill to make a tuna melt that he. . .very likely throws away.

In episode 7 he fails at making an omelet featuring his unique whisking style(I'm pretty sure he's mentally disabled). He also specifically sets the metal and plastic spatula out on the stove as he plans to call his fans whiners and idiots because his NPD requires him to tell them he knows what the fuck he's doing and is right. . .he then precedes to burn the fuck out of his omelet while making the middle still runny and not melt the cheese :stress:

Thus l present to you 'The Spatula Saga' :story:

Edit: Oh, also @Lurkette this channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGzoMBBrEusFHBWhXmBQfFw/videos?disable_polymer=1 has Episodes 1 - 8 of 'Poorly Cooking with the King' which were all off TheKingOfHateHD.

ya, i saw em all before you quoted :P. binge watched em. during ep3 i thought of a great meme. you know that sound the frozen hamburger makes when he flips it over "tink" i was gonna do a tink, tink tink, tink(last one) (camera moves closer with each tink) and the last tink would switch over to him hitting his forehead with the game case.
 
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Well folks, Khet is just to busy to cook Thanksgiving dinner, so D$P says they are going to buy a Thanksgiving Bundle at the grocery store of pre-cooked food they can heat-n-eat. His mom might send him a pre-cooked turkey from some online store. Apparently, she has done so before.
 
Well folks, Khet is just to busy to cook Thanksgiving dinner, so D$P says they are going to buy a Thanksgiving Bundle at the grocery store of pre-cooked food they can heat-n-eat. His mom might send him a pre-cooked turkey from some online store. Apparently, she has done so before.
That's oh so very sad and further proof that he probably has to pay Kat now to come over and their relationship is dead.
 
Well folks, Khet is just to busy to cook Thanksgiving dinner, so D$P says they are going to buy a Thanksgiving Bundle at the grocery store of pre-cooked food they can heat-n-eat. His mom might send him a pre-cooked turkey from some online store. Apparently, she has done so before.
He has absolutely no money. He is just scraping by to pay bills. He doesn't know if he's going to make it from week to week.

Purchases a Thanksgiving Bundle of precooked food, because neither Kat nor himself can cook a reasonable dinner for two people on a budget.
 
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Weird how he gloated about Kat's cooking for a few weeks and how he can make this super authentic italian sauce, but cannot even roast a turkey and prepare simple side shit like gravy, mashed potatoes, and green bean casserole. All of which involve cans and bags with reheating.

Surprised he wasn't doing a Thanksgiving special where he plays a game and leaves every 20 minutes to cook his dinner. I guess that sub goal didn't become successful or he didn't think about it.
 
Thanksgiving is a holiday to spend with friends and family and being thankful for everything good that happened this year.

When you don't have friends or family and are ungrateful Thanksgiving is just Thursday.

But he has to have a traditional Thanksgiving turkey meal. He's a real American and real Americans eat turkey. They don't vote though because voting is for suckers.

Cook whatever you want. It's not big deal. Kat will be leaving in a matter of time anyways.
 
Yes, this was all part of today's prestream. https://youtu.be/e4IFaNnqnRU?t=1555

25:55 Start of shoutout for a cheer asking about the Thanksgiving schedule, talks about his mom buying them a Thanksgiving meal & it sounds like DSP prompts her to get one on their weekly phone calls. If not, they'll see about buying something like those Fred Meyer meal kits.
28:30-29:08 ends the Thanksgiving meal talk and notes Ask the King stream timing depends on Kat's schedule, might be in the main or second stream slot depending on when she's around to eat dinner.
 
ive nvr, ever heard someone say "homemade margaritas" god it even reads stupid let alone sounds.

I was a bartender in undergrad, so I get conscripted to play the part whenever the family gathers. When they say “homemade margaritas”, they usually mean you don’t use a mix like pic related:

71WlEmJv6xL._SL1500_.jpg


A margarita is just lime, tequila, triple sec (or “Orange liqueur” if you’re at a place that charges too much. If they call it “dry curaçao”, just get up and leave because you’re about to get butt fucked by a bartender who thinks they’re smarter than you). It’s not exactly rocket science, but whenever you go to a bar or Mexican food place they’ll use sweet and sour mix or “sour mix” and tequila so people have become accustomed to margaritas being a sweet, sugary drink with a hint of sour. Like candy. When they make “homemade margaritas” they don’t think it tastes right.

Mezcal makes better margaritas. Just don’t get a bottle that has dead things floating in it, that’s crappy mezcal. If you can find triple sec that’s around 40% alcohol for cheap, get that. They won’t market it as triple sec to trick you, the unassuming customer, but that’s what it is.
 
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