Lovequest The Relationship Vows

That sounds like a good idea at first but he has a history of harassing girls. Right now, he's so desperate for a girl, that he probably won't be afraid to ask for a date outright. Yes it would help him socialize more but no because he'll be stalking the girls. I think he should feel comfortable socializing with men first before he socializes with girls so he can understand that talking to men won't make him gay and that doing so will help him ease his views on gender where men are jerks and women are nice. Sure that will take a long time but it would help his social skills more.

Yeah, I admit the idea is for a young Chris. he wasn't as creepy during high school?

Not sure what can be done with an adult stubborn as ever Chris. It would take an event to tear apart everything he knows and then be built back up. Some sort of male team sport where he is treated as an equal expected to pull his weight, but thats not going to happen.
 
Sure. But his social skills are poor and probably always will be. It would be great if he could move them from a 1/10 to a 3/10, but he is never going to get a high grade. So if he is going to have any sort of relationship, frendship or more, he is going to have to find someone who isn't as bothered by social skill.

But I do agree that if he doesn't improve his social skills a little, it is a hopeless cause.
He'll never have a romantic relationship if he doesn't improve his social skills a little. He'll need to try to make friends first.
Hiding his dating profile is virtually impossible. If trolls can't find him, how is his sweetheart going to? And if trolls can find him, almost all contact is going to be from trolls.
You kidding me? It's trivial for Chris to hide his internet habits. I think you really overestimate the competence of your average ween.
 
Sure. But his social skills are poor and probably always will be. It would be great if he could move them from a 1/10 to a 3/10, but he is never going to get a high grade. So if he is going to have any sort of relationship, frendship or more, he is going to have to find someone who isn't as bothered by social skill.
His problem isn't just that he doesn't socialize enough though. Chris inherited very toxic views about other people from Barb, and his misadventures with trolls have made them worse. What I mean is, improving social skills isn't as simple as going from 1/10 to 3/10 (I know you were oversimplifying to make a point, I am too.) He might go out, talk to people more and more and learn to express himself more effectively, but that's not the only social problem Chris has. The problem isn't just that Chris is very shy and his autism has kept him from developing social skills on his own, it's also that he's an asshole. There's a bunch of reasons why he's an asshole, and it mostly isn't his fault, but an asshole he is, and that's something that needs to be deprogrammed before he goes out and socializes.

We see Chris (arguably) as he is: a pitiable man who has a hard time to cope, but Chris sees himself as a spunky internet celebrity whose only problem in life is a lack of girlfriend due to the interference of trolls. What's more, he's learned to associate concepts he finds uncomfortable with trolls and bullies, essentially allowing him to shut out anything he doesn't want to hear. That's all well and good when dealing with people online, but in real life, there's a diversity of opinion out there you have to cope with. I really think that before Chris goes out and socializes, he needs to work on the deep-seated personal issues that have been plaguing him since childhood. Right now, any social activity with Chris requires the other party accept Chris as he presents himself, which is why he socializes with internet trolls and mall cops. If Chris learns to accept himself as he is, maybe then he'll be able to socialize normally, and maybe he'll even get that girlfriend he's always wanted.
 
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Emotional, open, supportive, honest, loyal. Does Chris even know what those words mean, or does he just mentally copy-paste them whenever he's trying to be all sweet and stuff?

He has some idea of what "honest" means, and hopes he can be that way around her, like he was around Julay.
 
His problem isn't just that he doesn't socialize enough though. Chris inherited very toxic views about other people from Barb, and his misadventures with trolls have made it worse. What I mean is, improving social skills isn't as simple as going from 1/10 to 3/10 (I know you were oversimplifying to make a point, I am too.) He might go out, talk to people more and more and learn to express himself more effectively, but that's not the only social problem Chris has. The problem isn't just that Chris is very shy and his autism has kept him from developing social skills on his own, it's also that he's an asshole. There's a bunch of reasons why he's an asshole, and it mostly isn't his fault, but an asshole he is, and that's something that needs to be deprogrammed before he goes out and socializes.

We see Chris (arguably) as he is: a pitiable man who has a hard time to cope, but Chris sees himself as a spunky internet celebrity whose only problem in life is a lack of girlfriend due to the interference of trolls. What's more, he's learned to associate concepts he finds uncomfortable with trolls and bullies, essentially allowing him to shut out anything he doesn't want to hear. That's all well and good when dealing with people online, but in real life, there's a diversity of opinion out there you have to cope with. I really think that before Chris goes out and socializes, he needs to work on the deep-seated personal issues that have been plaguing him since childhood. Right now, any social activity with Chris requires the other party accept Chris as he presents himself, which is why he socializes with internet trolls and mall cops. If Chris learns to accept himself as he is, maybe then he'll be able to socialize normally, and maybe he'll even get that girlfriend he's always wanted.

That and he will need to give up a few things such as his tomgirl schtick and his My Little Pony obsession. Granted that there are adult Bronies but that's something else. What Chris needs to learn the most is the concept of modesty. Girls don't like it when men become too pushy on them.
 
You kidding me? It's trivial for Chris to hide his internet habits. I think you really overestimate the competence of your average ween.
On a dating site? Where if he hopes to find a date he will have to put his location, his age, and pictures? No sense in lying about location. I suppose he could lie about age or put fake pictures but that would end up fairly problematic.

Take OkCupid. All a ween would have to do is search 32 year old people near Charlottesville. I just did that. Within 50km of Charlottesville, there were 48 men who are 32 and interested in women and 2 women who are 32 and interested in women online in the last week. Chris' profile jumped right out at me, and all I used was age, location and picture. I didn't search his name or any CWCkisms.

It's one thing for a semi-competent person to do things like post on forums while maintaining anonymity. It's another to do something like post a dating profile, where your goal is to be found. He could hide it, but that would defeat the point of having it at all.

His problem isn't just that he doesn't socialize enough though. Chris inherited very toxic views about other people from Barb, and his misadventures with trolls have made them worse. What I mean is, improving social skills isn't as simple as going from 1/10 to 3/10 (I know you were oversimplifying to make a point, I am too.) He might go out, talk to people more and more and learn to express himself more effectively, but that's not the only social problem Chris has. The problem isn't just that Chris is very shy and his autism has kept him from developing social skills on his own, it's also that he's an asshole. There's a bunch of reasons why he's an asshole, and it mostly isn't his fault, but an asshole he is, and that's something that needs to be deprogrammed before he goes out and socializes.

We see Chris (arguably) as he is: a pitiable man who has a hard time to cope, but Chris sees himself as a spunky internet celebrity whose only problem in life is a lack of girlfriend due to the interference of trolls. What's more, he's learned to associate concepts he finds uncomfortable with trolls and bullies, essentially allowing him to shut out anything he doesn't want to hear. That's all well and good when dealing with people online, but in real life, there's a diversity of opinion out there you have to cope with. I really think that before Chris goes out and socializes, he needs to work on the deep-seated personal issues that have been plaguing him since childhood. Right now, any social activity with Chris requires the other party accept Chris as he presents himself, which is why he socializes with internet trolls and mall cops. If Chris learns to accept himself as he is, maybe then he'll be able to socialize normally, and maybe he'll even get that girlfriend he's always wanted.

That makes sense. To put my point into your framework, if he is able to accept himself as he is, that person is always going to be a little awkward and weird. In order to find friendships or the possibility of a relationship he is going to have to find people willing to have an awkward, weird friend or partner. I don't see the type of people he would meet at a gay bar as being that type of people. Sure they accept a little weirdness, but not the type of weirdness Chris is always going to have.

But I definitely do agree with your point that Chris has to change his attitude about himself and/or the way he interacts with people before he has much hope of finding anyone anywhere.
 
HI do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

He'll have to re-work his speech patterns to cut down on all of the "[adjective] and the [another adjective]" jibber in his sentences.
 
His biggest hurdle is his unwillingness to put effort into any aspect of his life. His outright lazy nature is his real handicap, forget autism.

But that's still a long shot. If Fatty did everything right he still would only be at a 4 out of 10, he's just another loser in the genetic lottery that is life.
 
On a dating site? Where if he hopes to find a date he will have to put his location, his age, and pictures? No sense in lying about location. I suppose he could lie about age or put fake pictures but that would end up fairly problematic.

Take OkCupid. All a ween would have to do is search 32 year old people near Charlottesville. I just did that. Within 50km of Charlottesville, there were 48 men who are 32 and interested in women and 2 women who are 32 and interested in women online in the last week. Chris' profile jumped right out at me, and all I used was age, location and picture. I didn't search his name or any CWCkisms.

It's one thing for a semi-competent person to do things like post on forums while maintaining anonymity. It's another to do something like post a dating profile, where your goal is to be found. He could hide it, but that would defeat the point of having it at all.
Well yeah, it's easy to find his account once you know it exists.
 
Well yeah, it's easy to find his account once you know it exists.
He managed to keep an eharmony profile for a while. To my knowledge, no troll found it.
But that's still a long shot. If Fatty did everything right he still would only be at a 4 out of 10, he's just another loser in the genetic lottery that is life.
He was dealt a pretty shitty hand, yes :(
 
He managed to keep an eharmony profile for a while. To my knowledge, no troll found it.

He was dealt a pretty shitty hand, yes :(

As is my understanding from many years ago, its not an open account for anyone to browse. You answer a buttload of personality questions and you only see who they match with you. I am very curious to see who he would be matched with.
 
He'll need to try to make friends first.

This is the crux of the problem. Chris wants to rocket past the friendship part of the relationship to get right to the soul mate, lifelong commitment, replacement mommy bit.

Again, I'm going to bring up The Wallflower as an example. He barely knew her, yet he took the liberty to plan dates and visits (him hanging our at her place, of course). Anyway, I'm going to stop there, we all know how things turned out.
 
If I remember right, he did mention something how he's on some kind of medication so to me, it sounds like he's on antidepressants and he's so depressed, that not even antidepressants can help him.

Drugs are not effective without therapy to match them. Speaking from personal experience, it's impossible to get a "passing grade" on depression management without both.
 
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I'm gonna be true and honest here that list is kinda sweet. Did Chris and "Catherine" come up with these or was it all from some show he watched?
Chris' list is stuff you should be doing in a relationship in the first place. It's just a very autistic way for him to try to show Catherine that he knows what it takes to be in a relationship (even if he doesn't).
 
I admit I'm only going off one picture of her, but you don't think that maybe if they spent enough time together she might have considered dating Chris?
I don't think she was looking to date anyone. If she ended up dating someone, that someone would have to be very self aware and talented to get past her natural shyness and social unease. That's definitely not Chris.
 
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