Lovequest The Relationship Vows

[jemas42]

He got his amnyfest ring for graduating Mancherster High. Noteworthy is the fact he doesn't know it's called Amethyst and him putting such a huge value on it. I guess most people are proud of their graduation rings but eventually move on in college, that's at least what I would do.
Chris being obsessed with a high-school graduation ring even now is certainly not normal...

Well of course he puts a huge amount of value on it. It gives him his magic powers. Without it he wouldn't be able to use his Curse Ye-Ha-Me-Ha. He must have really trusted Catherine with it, if he was willing to risk his powers.

 

[Thetan]

Well of course he puts a huge amount of value on it. It gives him his magic powers. Without it he wouldn't be able to use his Curse Ye-Ha-Me-Ha. He must have really trusted Catherine with it, if he was willing to risk his powers.

The explanation is really far more simple. The ring was simply to "seal the deal", to lock Catherine in so that she wouldn't run away like every other "sweetheart". Chris wants to ensure that his future is provided for in advance of Barb's inevitable demise. This is why I suspect he's suddenly thrown all caution to the wind and he's trying OKCupid and other such means to attract and secure his replacement mommy.

 

[Haesindang Park]

The explanation is really far more simple. The ring was simply to "seal the deal", to lock Catherine in so that she wouldn't run away like every other "sweetheart". Chris wants to ensure that his future is provided for in advance of Barb's inevitable demise. This is why I suspect he's suddenly thrown all caution to the wind and he's trying OKCupid and other such means to attract and secure his replacement mommy.

He might have better luck in Craigslist I think despite the risks.

 

[Thetan]

He might have better luck in Craigslist I think despite the risks.

His best bet is to get out more and socialize. Impulse Gay Social club sponsors events in the Charlottesville area (movie nights, etc.); this would present a perfect opportunity for him to make friends in a [more or less] safe and more accepting environment.

The biggest problem with the above is Chris's lack of conversational skills. The minute he started blathering about the trolls, My Little Pony, or Sanic, whoever he was talking with would politely excuse themselves and probably try to avoid him from that point onwards.

I do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

 

[Lalala]

His best bet is to get out more and socialize. Impulse Gay Social club sponsors events in the Charlottesville area (movie nights, etc.); this would present a perfect opportunity for him to make friends in a [more or less] safe and more accepting environment.

The biggest problem with the above is Chris's lack of conversational skills. The minute he started blathering about the trolls, My Little Pony, or Sanic, whoever he was talking with would politely excuse themselves and probably try to avoid him from that point onwards.

I do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

I think Chris's problem is less the choice of topic (cos I know enough man/woman-childs out there who could talk for hours about childish things, myself included) but more the fact that Chris doesn't understand that a conversation consists of more than him talking and someone else smiling and nodding. If he could learn to listen properly to what someone says in response to his rambles and carry the conversation from there he might have better luck, right now he'd probably fall back on that classic "Hmm...yeah....but anyway back to what I was saying...."

 

[Stud2Stud]

His best bet is to get out more and socialize. Impulse Gay Social club sponsors events in the Charlottesville area (movie nights, etc.); this would present a perfect opportunity for him to make friends in a [more or less] safe and more accepting environment.

The biggest problem with the above is Chris's lack of conversational skills. The minute he started blathering about the trolls, My Little Pony, or Sanic, whoever he was talking with would politely excuse themselves and probably try to avoid him from that point onwards.

I do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

I know it goes without saying but unless Chris actually wants these changes in himself to happen, there will never be a hope of him improving. I might be wrong, but my impression is him being fond of accusing the other people of discrimination, being jerks or whatever when a conversation goes south. Or rather: he would do so if he had enough conversations to put such a pattern on it.

It's sad. He can't talk to people cause his lacking social skills make it hard for him. But in order to improve them, he has to talk to people. Doesn't mean he can't improve, it's just going to be one tough ride to do so, and it's rather obvious Chris would give up early on. Especially when he prefers uncaring ass-patters to actual friends who care about him.

Question somewhat related: Did Renee ever try to help Chris improve his image/style? As someone put it, he just looks unpleasant. Not so much bad as more like a guy you don't want to have too much contact with. In order to socialize more, he should work on looking more normal. Not even female or male, but normal. I guess any attempt at improving Chris choice of clothing, make-up and hairdo will be shot down or perverted immediately.

I think Chris's problem is less the choice of topic (cos I know enough man/woman-childs out there who could talk for hours about childish things, myself included) but more the fact that Chris doesn't understand that a conversation consists of more than him talking and someone else smiling and nodding. If he could learn to listen properly to what someone says in response to his rambles and carry the conversation from there he might have better luck, right now he'd probably fall back on that classic "Hmm...yeah....but anyway back to what I was saying...."

Marvin said a few times Chris is incredibly, soul-numbingly boring.
I wonder if he could have a mutually satisfying conversation with someone from (say) the MLP fandom.
It doesn't really help Chris doesn't have much to talk about. Or rather: He doesn't have much to talk about that's not going to weird out the other person.

For Chris a dialogue seems to consist mainly of him broadcasting information and it's not even important if the other person really listens as long as (s)he is 'within broadcasting range'. Point in case: Renee never answering and Chris still being fond of talking to the obvious sockpuppet.

 

[warongiygas]

I do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

This will sound cynical, but I'm not sure it's that simple. Chris has serious problems with how he views himself and how he views others. Part of the problem is his sedentary lifestyle, part of it is Barb's toxic behavior, and part of it is autism. The LGBT community tends to be more accepting, true, but they're not babysitters. Realistically, unless there's china in the mix, Chris is not going to start socializing while he can safely remain home with Barb. He may go out a couple times, but he's not going to change his social habits unless there's some immediate benefit for doing so.

Chris needs professional help. Regular therapy would no doubt be beneficial for Chris, but the gains would be spread out over a long time, so it's likely Chris would give up before he gets better. I'm of the opinion that professional help is necessary, however, and barring that, Chris will just keep digging himself deeper and deeper in the hoard

 

[Haesindang Park]

I'm of the opinion that professional help is necessary, however, and barring that, Chris will just keep digging himself deeper and deeper in the hoard

Not to mention, depression which he mentioned in his text. If I remember right, he did mention something how he's on some kind of medication so to me, it sounds like he's on antidepressants and he's so depressed, that not even antidepressants can help him. So maybe depression could be a factor in why he's been acting like a weirdo but worse over time. If only Thetan could convince him to see psychiatric help since she convinced him to remove his piercing but then again, self-removal of the piercing doesn't cost money. I wonder if his plans to attend Slutwalk next year would provide him a social outlet.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

The explanation is really far more simple. The ring was simply to "seal the deal", to lock Catherine in so that she wouldn't run away like every other "sweetheart". Chris wants to ensure that his future is provided for in advance of Barb's inevitable demise. This is why I suspect he's suddenly thrown all caution to the wind and he's trying OKCupid and other such means to attract and secure his replacement mommy.

Christ, that's sad. This really feels like his stubbornness in action. His entire seduction armoury consists of telling women that he's sweet and kind and supportive and emotionally open and honest, because that's what works in cartoons. But despite being told that he needs to actually act on that description and improve himself, he prefers to just try the same thing, but harder. "Look at this ring! I am definitely kind and supportive and honest! I really am making that promise! Looooove meeeee!"

What worries me is that I think he could find himself in a position where being trolled by fake sweethearts is one of the better things that happens. A guy who is so desperate that he will give a woman anything just to get a few dates is very open to being exploited. "Oh sure Chris, I'd love to come and see you, but I live such a long way away... could you wire me $200 for the fare?" "My abusive ex stole the money! I need another $200, I'll make it up to you, promise! " "I had to go into hospital, how will I ever afford to come and see you now? And I was really looking forward to our sex time, too..."

 

[warongiygas]

Not to mention, depression which he mentioned in his text. If I remember right, he did mention something how he's on some kind of medication so to me, it sounds like he's on antidepressants and he's so depressed, that not even antidepressants can help him. So maybe depression could be a factor in why he's been acting like a weirdo but worse over time. If only Thetan could convince him to see psychiatric help since she convinced him to remove his piercing but then again, self-removal of the piercing doesn't cost money. I wonder if his plans to attend Slutwalk next year would provide him a social outlet.

Slutwalk is a protest march of sorts, which means it's easy to get lost in the crowd. The only social interaction I can imagine is if Chris decides to make his own placard... and if he does bring his own placard, I can't imagine the social interaction would be very pleasant.

 

[Marvin]

Slutwalk is a protest march of sorts, which means it's easy to get lost in the crowd. The only social interaction I can imagine is if Chris decides to make his own placard... and if he does bring his own placard, I can't imagine the social interaction will be very pleasant.

If he doesn't cause trouble, he'll feel like he's socializing, and that'll be nice for him.

 

[just some jerk]

This will sound cynical, but I'm not sure it's that simple. Chris has serious problems with how he views himself and how he views others. Part of the problem is his sedentary lifestyle, part of it is Barb's toxic behavior, and part of it is autism. The LGBT community tends to be more accepting, true, but they're not babysitters. Realistically, unless there's china in the mix, Chris is not going to start socializing while he can safely remain home with Barb. He may go out a couple times, but he's not going to change his social habits unless there's some immediate benefit for doing so.

Chris needs professional help. Regular therapy would no doubt be beneficial for Chris, but the gains would be spread out over a long time, so it's likely Chris would give up before he gets better. I'm of the opinion that professional help is necessary, however, and barring that, Chris will just keep digging himself deeper and deeper in the hoard

I don't think hanging out at the gay bar using his Pick Up Autism would benefit him. I would not want him joining something defined solely by his sexuality (ugh) though its better interaction than trolls and Barb.

I've believed Adlerian therapy would work best for Chris, in that he would connect and empathize through helping actions and teamwork. Those portions of his brain seem not to be developed. I would have advised a younger Chris to spend time at the humane society since he seems OK with animals and there are many 16-24 year old gal-pals to socialize with, whilst performing some sort of function.

Oh am I the first one to use the term "Chris the Pick-up Autist"?

 

[Haesindang Park]

I would have advised a younger Chris to spend time at the humane society since he seems OK with animals and there are many 16-24 year old gal-pals to socialize with, whilst performing some sort of function.

That sounds like a good idea at first but he has a history of harassing girls. Right now, he's so desperate for a girl, that he probably won't be afraid to ask for a date outright. Yes it would help him socialize more but no because he'll be stalking the girls. I think he should feel comfortable socializing with men first before he socializes with girls so he can understand that talking to men won't make him gay and that doing so will help him ease his views on gender where men are jerks and women are nice. Sure that will take a long time but it would help his social skills more.

 

[timtommy]

His best bet is to get out more and socialize. Impulse Gay Social club sponsors events in the Charlottesville area (movie nights, etc.); this would present a perfect opportunity for him to make friends in a [more or less] safe and more accepting environment.

I actually think, absent the threat of trolls, dating sites are his best bet for a date. A girl who is lonely and awkward is much more likely to use those than go a club. At a club he surrounded by more social people and expected to be "on" more. Although that applies to the pre-tomgirl era when with a little effort he was able to look like a fairly average guy. Now it may be hopeless. And trolling attempts are always going to get in the way of things he tries to do online.

The biggest problem with the above is Chris's lack of conversational skills. The minute he started blathering about the trolls, My Little Pony, or Sanic, whoever he was talking with would politely excuse themselves and probably try to avoid him from that point onwards.

I do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

That is really hard for anyone to do. I have seen lots of guys and girls try to fake interests to be more interesting or attractive, and it tends to fail miserably.
Also, he isn't really capable of having an interest. Suppose he decided to watch shows or movies, listen to music, or read books that were age appropriate. He would have a ridiculously juvenile understanding of them. If they were brought up he would be able to make some comment, but it would be so stupid he would have been much better off saying "No, I haven't seen that show, tell me about it."

I tend to be skeptical in general about the idea of "common interests" with potential partners. I have been on a few first dates with girls I had a lot in common with. We talked for a couple hours about those common interests, never really had a sense of each other, and didn't want to see each other again. I usually spend the first couple dates with girls I end up liking swapping funny or personal stories or talking about the things only one of us knows about. But maybe that's just me.

 

[blackie toy]

It could be Chris found out about the pre-engagement ring:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pre-engagement_ring

Or a pre-commitment ring.

 

[Marvin]

I actually think, absent the threat of trolls, dating sites are his best bet for a date. A girl who is lonely and awkward is much more likely to use those than go a club. At a club he surrounded by more social people and expected to be "on" more. Although that applies to the pre-tomgirl era when with a little effort he was able to look like a fairly average guy. Now it may be hopeless. And trolling attempts are always going to get in the way of things he tries to do online.

Chris needs to build up social skills in general, not just try to sneak his incompetence past someone's attention.

 

[deeman]

I do believe, however, that, with practice, Chris could learn to carry on a normal, adult conversation. He just has to broaden his horizons a bit (which may end up being a tall order but it's still doable).

How about... NO. Teaching old dogs to s(h)it and all that... It would be like "Miracle on 14 Branchland Court"

 

[Haesindang Park]

I actually think, absent the threat of trolls, dating sites are his best bet for a date. A girl who is lonely and awkward is much more likely to use those than go a club.

Probably not since the weens will find out and make fake online personas to screw with him. Not to mention, the dating sites he uses charges fees of some sort. Surprised that he hasn't mentioned about him ranting how he has to pay for love on a dating website but then again, he already paid for a hooker.

 

[Marvin]

Probably not since the weens will find out and make fake online personas to screw with him. Not to mention, the dating sites he uses charges fees of some sort. Surprised that he hasn't mentioned about him ranting how he has to pay for love on a dating website but then again, he already paid for a hooker.

He'll keep the dating profiles secret. Catie got in because knowledge of his okcupid account got leaked.

 

[timtommy]

Chris needs to build up social skills in general, not just try to sneak his incompetence past someone's attention.

Sure. But his social skills are poor and probably always will be. It would be great if he could move them from a 1/10 to a 3/10, but he is never going to get a high grade. So if he is going to have any sort of relationship, frendship or more, he is going to have to find someone who isn't as bothered by social skill.

But I do agree that if he doesn't improve his social skills a little, it is a hopeless cause.

Probably not since the weens will find out and make fake online personas to screw with him. Not to mention, the dating sites he uses charges fees of some sort. Surprised that he hasn't mentioned about him ranting how he has to pay for love on a dating website but then again, he already paid for a hooker.

Nope. OkCupid is generally free. You can pay for an upgraded account, but there are very few useful features that you can't access with a free account. Most people don't pay for OKCupid, and I doubt Chris did. He did have a Match.com profile once. On match, you can have a free account, but it is basically useless because any useful feature is reserved for pay accounts. He may have paid for that, and the Charlottesville dating service he met "Jackie" on. But you don't have to pay to date online.

He'll keep the dating profiles secret. Catie got in because knowledge of his okcupid account got leaked.

It seems almost impossible to keep them secret. I know on OKCupid and a couple other dating sites you can set your profile so only registered users can see it, but you have to be searchable by users of the site. You can have a basically blank profile, but most sites restrict the things you can do with a blank profile in order to discourage them. Also, those types of profiles tend to get way less responses.

Hiding his dating profile is virtually impossible. If trolls can't find him, how is his sweetheart going to? And if trolls can find him, almost all contact is going to be from trolls.

His best hope would probably be to lurk a dating site for a while and note who the available girls are in the area. He can assume most of those are genuine. It is a safe assumption that there aren't tons of trolls squatting on all the dating sites Chris might sign up for. Then he can set up a profile and exclusively interact with the girls who were there before him.

Of course all of this is pre-tomgirl when he could present himself to a stranger as an awkward and slightly weird, but potentially pleasant guy. Now it seems hopeless.