Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[StarkRavingMad]

Imagine if this trilogy had actually taken its time to develop Rey as a more well-rounded character, who had to grow into becoming such a strong Jedi, regardless of whether she was just a nobody or a Palpatine? And they could have EASILY given Rey the whole conflict about being a Palpatine without bringing the Emperor back, by the way, but I digress.

Imagine if we all had gotten that reunion of Luke, Leia, and Han ... And over the course of those movies, Rey would be right along with them, growing as a character. Then, after losing them, she takes the name of Skywalker after being a "nobody" for so long and after learning that the Skywalkers became her family?

That shit would have been earned, and I bet the fans would have embraced it just fine. Instead, we get a deadbeat father Han Solo, an asshole Luke Skywalker who dies by literally phoning it in at the last minute, and a Leia who has none of her abilities explained and will also die unceremoniously. And no "OG Trilogy" reunion, to top it all off.

It is crystal clear that Rey taking the Skywalker name is Kathleen Kennedy's way of saying that Rey is the true Skywalker, and the true Chosen One (hence the obnoxious AF title of the movie). None of the Skywalkers, even Vader's redemption, did jack shit ... Only Rey could end Palpatine.

Disney fucked this all up so, so badly. It blows my damn mind. The "Fandom Menace" doesn't hate Rey because she's a "wamen." She's a very poorly-written character, and this trilogy keeps telling us that she's the greatest character of all time while shitting on all of the characters that we essentially grew up with and have known/loved for so long.

If there is one word to describe this mess of a trilogy, it is most definitely "disrespectful."

 

[Comicsgeist]

I finally caught up to now from all the way in 1023. I have now been left with nothing but hollowness in my body and soul and just tired anger towards the Rat in killing a childhood that I didn't have and having to fill it with shows that range from mediocre to great, but now this may slowly taint my love for everything outside of the movies, which feels worse than having no emotional attachment to everything around me. If someone truly replaced Abeloth (thank you for giving me a good reason to call her that), then I hope that there can be another revision to the EU, perhaps bringing back old with a mixture of the good/interesting parts of the nu-EU along with a complete revision of the nu-Trilogy to something...better than fucking this so that the prequels can go back to being the more controversial out of the 3 trilogies.

Is it normal to feel your soul dying and wishing for death (either on yourself or another person) over something relatively mundane than the loss of a loved one? Because it's gnawing inside of me.

In this season of hope and good will to all men, I recommend (if you haven't already) that you download Harmy's Despecalized Edition.
It's a painstaking HD restoration of the original 1977 theatrical print that strips away all of George's fuckery and it has the magical curative effect of transporting you back to a time when Starwars wasn't shite.
I promise that while watching it, all the years of fail will melt away and your soul will be healed just like Arthur drinking from the holy Grail.

Harmy's STAR WARS Despecialized Edition HD - V2.7 MKV IS OUT NOW - Original Trilogy

Posted by Harmy on undefined

originaltrilogy.com

 

[Jub-Jub]

Go away for a few hours and can't keep up with the shitposting due to forum changes. Get back to find out that ~26pages have been added...WTF did i miss?..
Oh...Oh...wow what a shit-show. Looks like Disney managed to middle of the road it and piss everyone off. I thought we might be getting gushing shills and meh reactions with a side of 'well at least it's not TLJ' reasoning from haters. If the shills are meh or hating it i can't imagine what the "fandom menace" are going to be posting.

Lando is such a shit dad now that he let his kids be kidnapped and they never even knew him, but he still got an actual legacy out of this shit unlike the rest... Fuck this is all so bizarre and messed up.

Can't wait for the marvel comic book where it's explained that Lando just really, really needed to get some death sticks from the space store.

We are a news website, the greatest one that ever was and we are shielded by all kinds of laws protecting journalists.

Yeah, fuck LEGO!

Welcome newbies, get avatars and start shitposting while you await the great salt harvest.

 

[ditto]

What is wrong with your FAaaacccEeE!

When you go for the Mouth of Sauron look but end up with grandma after eating chocolate cake.

 

[Judge Holden]

oh god I don't think Mike is going to survive this one, we might have to get Macaulay Culkin to replace him for the plinket video

Cut to Milwalkee winter: Mac is burying both Mike's empty Crystal Skull bottle and Rich's Tums jar outside the studio. An old homeless man passes by and says that nobody’s been here for ages and asks who he is. Mac looks towards the horizon and sees the meth induced hallucinations of Mike and Rich glaring at him

"Im Mac" he finally says...

"Mac Plinkett"

 

[neverendingmidi]

That is true, but this is also the race whose women are most likely to be sex slaves so there might be some in-universe biological bs that says Twi'leks are able to reproduce with almost any race that can do mammalian reproduction. And hell genetics is a weird thing irl where a kid takes more after one parent, the other, or other relatives, so it's possible to get a more Twi'lek-looking hybrid with minimal human features and a more human-looking hybrid with minimal Twi'lek features.

I had the feeling it was more that humans are the STD of the galaxy. Humans could and would fuck just about anything, and seemed to be able to crossbreed with anything.

 

[Lodoss Warrior]

I had the feeling it was more that humans are the STD of the galaxy. Humans could and would fuck just about anything, and seemed to be able to crossbreed with anything.

Hell, one of the biggest problems for the galaxy--the Sith race and religion--only became as powerful as it did because ancient Dark Jedi were too horny not to fuck and have offspring with red giants.

 

[Miller]

I think this reaction requires the classic, or worn-out, Laugh Out Loud. From Mister Scott 'I love Disney's Afterbirth' Mendelson himself:

View attachment 1054892

I hope that people start replying "Why do you hate women and minorities?" to every Disney shill who didn't like Episode IX.

 

[Dumb Bitch Smoothie]

The real Episode IX is gonna be the epic battle between Disney and all the TLJ shills who don't like the movie and have said they don't like the movie and the autistic slap fest that follows.

The movie was just the filler episode. Only tfw no beach outfits for everyone.

Also....alien rights??? Hello???
This is proof that humans deserve to be enslaved in the SW galaxy, fuck them humans and their drama.

 

[Rotollo]

So overall will the general public consider this forgettably bad or laughably bad?

 

[Judge Holden]

Everyone in this thread right now

 

[Miller]

That's the worst part about this. The nu-fanabse doesn't care how shitty the product is as long as their favorite character and self-insert get to fuck. The nu-fanabase is just 40% Reylos, 40% Ahsoka waifuists and 20% FinnPoes. All these people want to see is who gets to Force fuck each other. Its like the Twilight fanbase but somehow worse...

Its like the Twilight fanbase but somehow worse...

Kathleen Kennedy's wish was to turn Star Wars (a brand for everyone) into a product for young adult/girls. That's exactly the audience that she wanted and some extra aka the toxic part of that audience: the crazy cat ladies and the childless wine aunts.

Nice nerf gun disney, I'm so intimidated by the sith troopers.
View attachment 1054406

That individual on the left. I remember that face.

 

[AnAspieWithAVengeance]

So kid's christmas has been ruined. Thanks Disney. Also fuck China. Those little rats took out what might have been a decent scene near the end all because they don't like ghosts. Fuck em. And Fuck Disney for agreeing to it.

 

[AtomicAgeBoy]

At this point fans should create their own IP but basically ripoff everything from star wars and make their own sequel trilogy.

 

[King Dead]

Add me to the group of "people who were lurking until Null hid off-topic." By the time I registered, I had twenty pages to get through, including the leaks.

My god, I can't believe it was all real. Even after the travesty of TLJ and the relative snoozefest of Solo, I think there was still one tiny spot of hope beneath all the cynicism that this series I've loved since I was a kid could be turned around. But as the leaks began to pile up (and more importantly, remained fairly consistent), it became ever clearer that Plan IX would be just godawful.

Feelsy anecdote time: I've been digitizing my family's old home movies lately, and I found one of opening birthday presents back in '97, I believe. This was right after the Special Editions came out in theaters, which my dad took the family to, instilling a love of the series in me. My dad himself was a huge fan going back to the very first movie, and he wanted to pass on the love of Star Wars to the rest of us.

Anyway, the end of the tape had me playing with the Star Wars toys in typical childlike fashion: making my own engine noises and pewpew lasers, genuine enjoyment all the way through. It was heartwarming and poignant to see how much I used to love this series.

If you went back in time two decades and told little King Dead that two decades later, he'd not only hate Star Wars, but be rooting for its demise...well, honestly, you'd kind of be a dick to do that to a child. But I can guaranfuckingtee that young me would never believe it. Hell, you could just go back five years to the time between the buyout and TFA and do the same, and I still wouldn't believe it. But that's where we're at now.

All I can say at this point is: Burn, fucking rat. Burn.

 

[Judge Holden]

Kathleen Kennedy's wish was to turn Star Wars (a brand for everyone) into a product for young adult/girls. That's exactly the audience that she wanted and some extra aka the toxic part of that audience: the crazy cat ladies and the childless wine aunts.

She wanted to sell it to dedicated "franchise nomads"

The kind of people who loudly shrieked their love of twilight and named their cats and puppies and daughters Renesemee and then immediately dropped it like it never even existed once the final movie came out...

The people who had sobbing public breakdowns over the last harry potter film without ever reading the books or watching the first five movies...

The people who creamed themselves over the ending of Game of Thrones and then disinterestedly joined in the mass hate for it the next week...

The people who are solely interested in liking what they are told is hip and trendy and in the shallowest aesthetics of a creative work, be it the pretty shining lights or the costumes or the basest masturbatory shipping of characters...

The people who will supposedly fanatically buy everything they can from a franchise while it is out and then be ready forget all about it and to consume next product served up to them...

...but then they didnt. They bought the barest minimum of accessories and most of what they bought came from non disney sources, barely any tickets, and had zero interest in filling the void left by the exiled and despised fanboys.

Furthermore there just were not that many of them to begin with and they were vastly outnumbered not just by the normies but even by the old star wars fanboys, and so they had zero chance of making the investment KK put into pandering to them worth it.

 

[qu_rahn]

It irritates me that we finally get a yellow / gold saber and it's under these circumstances and at the end of the movie. They utterly failed on making anything cool in this trilogy

 

[Judge Holden]

It irritates me that we finally get a yellow / gold saber and it's under these circumstances and at the end of the movie. They utterly failed on making anything cool in this trilogy

*only just now realises they actually gave the totally-not-a-mary-sue her own special snowflake golden weapon*

 

[Raging Capybara]

Does yellow Yoda even appear in this trainwreck? I read the spoiler yesterday while sleepy so I could have missed some minor detail, but if she indeed doesn't have an important role in this movie, I'm ready to consider her even more useless than Phasma. Which is an outstanding accomplishment, how is that even possible?

 

[Dumb Bitch Smoothie]

Star Wars didn't need some huge movement for women and minorities. They already had the foundation. They didn't need to work hard at all to create a narrative.

Even with the mixed reactions towards the prequels, people's opinions of EU material, etc. They had every single open door available. Instead of working with their foundation they just shit all over it.

In my opinion EU did need to be separate, but it didn't need to end. They had people who would ALWAYS add new material, they had people who would ALWAYS buy that material. Just because they started making comic movies didnt mean that people stopped creating and consuming comics that operated independently from the movies.

But the point is they had so many options. So, so many. They destroyed all of them now. I like Fallen Order and to an extent parts of Mandalorian and a few ideas brought forth in Rebels but the difference being is the people who worked on those had a degree of love and respect for the source material and understood the importance of that symbiosis. And even then, Disney tried to micromanage these people who had a clear and specific relationship with Star Wars that they have held onto since their introduction to the series.

But Disney doesn't understand how people have relationships with specific IPs. They don't understand how people bond with characters and universes. Star Wars tanking should have woken them up.
Guess they need to tank Marvel too with identity politics and telling people how they're supposed to feel about the characters. Real great strategy.