Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

PseudoScrooge said:
Well, since TLJ is the worst thing that ever happened and the worst movie ever made, then it goes without saying that Plan 9 is already better!

Ironically, it's already been shown here, many times over, that Plan 9 is a festering turd. It's like ranking cancers.
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Maybe I should have been more clear..I still think the movie sucks, but just the idea of a corporation spending millions
on a movie to explicitly back track on the all the thems of the previous movie is just funny to me.
 
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Agarathium1066 said:
I don't know if I'd say TFA really tricked you or myself either, I enjoyed it though I also felt it was incredibly samey and predictable. I didn't like how they were setting up Rey and how it felt like a Tru-Value retelling of ANH, yet it felt like Star Wars enough to me that it put a smile on my face. It even made the person I went to the theater with, who'd never taken a single bit of interest in the universe, give many games like KOTOR I/II a try.

So I guess I'd say I too love me some wooshy-zwoops too, as critical as I can be.

..Also no worries bb I'll let you know how to score that extra foot. Stilts.
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The Force Awakens is what Bob Iger wanted the entire trilogy to be. Safe, unassuming, but enough to make fans happy if not satisified.

Disney paid too much, by a considerable margin, for the Star Wars brand. Iger wanted to make that money back without taking any risks to start. So, Force Awakens was given to a director known for pushing hard on nostalgia.
 
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Gehenna said:
The Force Awakens is what Bob Iger wanted the entire trilogy to be. Safe, unassuming, but enough to make fans happy if not satisified.

Disney paid too much, by a considerable margin, for the Star Wars brand. Iger wanted to make that money back without taking any risks to start. So, Force Awakens was given to a director known for pushing hard on nostalgia.
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I feel it served that very purpose. It was cozy and similar enough that at the end of the day I felt it was a 6 or 7 film. Not great, not terrible though if you consider it deeply enough you realize how much it was already popping a squat over the universe. I'd go into that but I feel like this thread has likely seen enough reiteration for ten lifetimes.
 
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Agarathium1066 said:
I don't know if I'd say TFA really tricked you or myself either, I enjoyed it though I also felt it was incredibly samey and predictable. I didn't like how they were setting up Rey and how it felt like a Tru-Value retelling of ANH, yet it felt like Star Wars enough to me that it put a smile on my face. It even made the person I went to the theater with, who'd never taken a single bit of interest in the universe, give many games like KOTOR I/II a try.

So I guess I'd say I too love me some wooshy-zwoops too, as critical as I can be.

..Also no worries bb I'll let you know how to score that extra foot. Stilts.
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With TFA, the overall package felt like a retroactive hoodwink I suppose. I smiled, I felt my nerd heart swell at seeing the Falcon and was giddily happy to see the ship graveyard on Jakku. I left the theater satisfied. And then the realization it's just ANH again but less interesting. If you remove pieces and fragments of ideas out of the movie and consider them separately, you can find a good deal of potential in numerous threads they introduce that then disappears when put together again. Which is frankly bizarre and headache-inducing because those pieces could go somewhere great with guidance except that they...don't. If nu-Wars counts for anything I hope it's more people trying out old SW media like your theater buddy 'cause that's real cool.

Oh shit, word? I'll have to get on that stilt game.
 
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Xulphis said:
With TFA, the overall package felt like a retroactive hoodwink I suppose. I smiled, I felt my nerd heart swell at seeing the Falcon and was giddily happy to see the ship graveyard on Jakku. I left the theater satisfied. And then the realization it's just ANH again but less interesting. If you remove pieces and fragments of ideas out of the movie and consider them separately, you can find a good deal of potential in numerous threads they introduce that then disappears when put together again. Which is frankly bizarre and headache-inducing because those pieces could go somewhere great with guidance except that they...don't. If nu-Wars counts for anything I hope it's more people trying out old SW media like your theater buddy 'cause that's real cool.

Oh shit, word? I'll have to get on that stilt game.
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If TLJ and TRoS had been on par with Force Awakens, people would take much less issue with TFA being a reworking of ANH.

The through line would be "Yah, its a rehash, but that puts it safely between the OT and PT in quality". Its everything AFTER TFA that retroactively nukes TFA from "Standard, but serviciable" to "Fuck this shit".
 
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Hot Take:
This was the ending always planned for. It was going to end this way no matter what.

Look at how this mess ends:
Every single named villian, Dead.
Every single character from the OT, except Lando and Chewie (olds): Dead or wiped.
Empire: Recently defeated
Lord of the Sith: Defeated, at the cost of someone dear to -
Jedi: Gone except for the knowledge held by a single individual who recieved enough traing to consider themselves the last member of the order.

This sounds a lot like the end of the Return of the Jedi, except everyone (except Lando) is dead and Luke is a girl & has no sister.
 
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Ghostse said:
Hot Take:
This was the ending always planned for. It was going to end this way no matter what.

Look at how this mess ends:
Every single named villian, Dead.
Every single character from the OT, except Lando and Chewie (olds): Dead or wiped.
Empire: Recently defeated
Lord of the Sith: Defeated, at the cost of someone dear to -
Jedi: Gone except for the knowledge held by a single individual who recieved enough traing to consider themselves the last member of the order.

This sounds a lot like the end of the Return of the Jedi, except everyone (except Lando) is dead and Luke is a girl & has no sister.
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just give me the wampa horror movie, i dont care anymore.
Do that story where storm troopers opened the cage that the wampas were in after cp3o took of the label. An hour and a half of storm troopers trying to run away in the snow tunnels. Then as the finale the clone commander of the squad has a face off with the one armed wampa from Empite in a big retard fight, ending with both dying like in "The Grey" and then we have darth vader come in at the end to remake how fucked up these tunnels are.
 
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JongleJingle said:
Again, the plot makes it CLEAR that Palpy won this. Literally EVERYTHING the protags did was all for nothing, because Palpy can just switch bodies without abandon.

The movie makes it seem victory has been achieved, when in reality Palps new order has only just begun.

Granted, if Palpatines actor actually does his lines and stuff real good, I won't mind if he rules the galaxy once more. Rey and her diversity hires don't deserve a happy ending.
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It's hilariously ironic. The old EU, with all its stories and lore, makes Sidious less impressive than the Nu-EU:

Old Sidious:
* Genuinely afraid of Vader
* Gets his ass kicked by Galen Marek
* Has competition for the most powerful Sith Lord of all time in Darth Vitiate, Exar Kun, and Darth Krayt
* Comes back to life only to get rekt by Luke, then shot in the back by Han

Nu Sdious:
* Views Vader's growing independence with amused indifference
* No one can compete with him post-Revenge of the Sith
* Undisputed master of the Dark Side. The Son and Momin are his bitches
* Comes back to life, plays Luke like a fiddle, lets his granddaughter spit upon the name of Skywalker, and laughs as his spirit continues to dwell in the galaxy
 
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Love_Machine011 said:
just give me the wampa horror movie, i dont care anymore.
Do that story where storm troopers opened the cage that the wampas were in after cp3o took of the label. An hour and a half of storm troopers trying to run away in the snow tunnels. Then as the finale the clone commander of the squad has a face off with the one armed wampa from Empite in a big exceptional individual fight, ending with both dying like in "The Grey" and then we have darth vader come in at the end to remake how fucked up these tunnels are.
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I always thought the Death Troopers book with the star destroyer crew being zombies was a highly entertaining and unique story. It would make a good R rated film.
 
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Lodoss Warrior said:
It's hilariously ironic. The old EU, with all its stories and lore, makes Sidious less impressive than the Nu-EU:

Old Sidious:
* Genuinely afraid of Vader
* Gets his ass kicked by Galen Marek
* Has competition for the most powerful Sith Lord of all time in Darth Vitiate, Exar Kun, and Darth Krayt
* Comes back to life only to get rekt by Luke, then shot in the back by Han

Nu Sdious:
* Views Vader's growing independence with amused indifference
* No one can compete with him post-Revenge of the Sith
* Undisputed master of the Dark Side. The Son and Momin are his bitches
* Comes back to life, plays Luke like a fiddle, lets his granddaughter spit upon the name of Skywalker, and laughs as his spirit continues to dwell in the galaxy
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And the worst part is the writers never even intended it to be that way. They were just trying to fix Rian Johnsons fuckery with killing Snoke halfway through the story and needed to replace the "big bad" with something else. And in there desperate flailing they bring back papa palpatine and make Rey his granddaughter because "she came from nothing" focus tested badly.

And it completely went over these hacks heads that by doing that it means it was Palpatine, and not Luke Skywalker who triumphed at the end of return of the Jedi. Not only does Palpatine deceive Luke, he also kills Darth Vader, later utterly destroys the new Jedi Order, corrupts Anakins grandson to the Dark Side and destroys the New Republic.

I would almost think this was some form of subversive brilliance if I did not know for a fact these hacks had no intention of writing a story where Palpatine wins. What a load of shit.
 
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GeneralFriendliness said:
Geez that's just unnerving. Also people using Baby Yoda as some kind of shield against criticism or dumb choices is as creepy as those trying to push and popularize the "I would die for Baby Yoda" memes.
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So I've decided to take a look at @DeathStarPR, and it appears to be a parody account. Hopefully it isn't one of those insufferable nuWars shills.
 
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mindlessobserver said:
And the worst part is the writers never even intended it to be that way. They were just trying to fix Rian Johnsons fuckery with killing Snoke halfway through the story and needed to replace the "big bad" with something else. And in there desperate flailing they bring back papa palpatine and make Rey his granddaughter because "she came from nothing" focus tested badly.

And it completely went over these hacks heads that by doing that it means it was Palpatine, and not Luke Skywalker who triumphed at the end of return of the Jedi. Not only does Palpatine deceive Luke, he also kills Darth Vader, later utterly destroys the new Jedi Order, corrupts Anakins grandson to the Dark Side and destroys the New Republic.

I would almost think this was some form of subversive brilliance if I did not know for a fact these hacks had no intention of writing a story where Palpatine wins. What a load of shit.
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You know what that plot point in your summarized form would have been... a good MIDDLE movie. Heroes at their lowest, realizing the big bad of the prior film is back. Now, have Kylo redeem himself, have Rey be lukes illegitimate child (And bury Reylo forever), and have the movie be about them achieving a 'grey' jedi by embracing both light and dark to finally defeat Palpatine once and for all.
Cliched as fuck? Yes. But it would have been infinitely better than what we go, and would actually have allowed a springboard for more stories. As is, the setting is... kinda dead.
 
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