Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Shield Breaker]

Yup, Jarbo loved it. Because of course, he did

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If you look closely at his cheek in the video, which you won't be able to do because I uploaded the 240p version to avoid Kiwi Farms' size limits and giving him views, you can see a black growth developing like the one possessing Eric Butts.

New theory: excess soy in the system creates mold / fungal infestations.

 

[qu_rahn]

More like Lando lost whatever fortune he had and retired on shithole Aki Aki because of the cost of living. Like boomers moving to Belize

 

[Ghostse]

Plan 9 is on track to finish up the weekend with about a 72 Million box office, roughly what TLJ did its 2nd week. It would seem TLJ's numbers are just about the floor of a numbered "Star Wars" performance.

 

[Clark Kent]

Spoiler: Lando rant.

No reason to make Lando a hermit. None. Less effort to just have him show up without acknowledging anything (clearly he isn't considered one of the "real" OT cast). Lends credence to the theory that the OT character assassination was by design. I don't want to believe it, but the Lando thing tells me *someone* at Disney is going the extra mile; it's possible that person or people (being uncreative) think being an outcast or pariah is the end of the world. They literally spent more effort breaking down/regressing OT characters than they did establishing/developing ST ones. The main villain's motivation and background are contradicted by different source of authorized, official lore; but make sure we throw in that Lando failed and ran away, because everyone else did.

No reason for that detail. Same damn cameo if he showed up, taking time off his duties as Mayor of Sci-Fi City in Place Other Than Clouds, or just retired "someplace else/nice/away." But they took time and effort to make sure we knew that Lando lives like a failure, hiding in squalor like the other heroes. Goddamn it.

 

[Gehenna]

Plan 9 is on track to finish up the weekend with about a 72 Million box office, roughly what TLJ did its 2nd week. It would seem TLJ's numbers are just about the floor of a numbered "Star Wars" performance.

I'd propose you have that exactly backwards. This isn't the floor... its the roof.

Take into count some facts:
1: The second weekend for this movie aligned with Christmas Bump. It is well documented that a five day period with Christmas as its center is a massive movie going period. In this case, the last day of that bump even aligned with a Friday. This is a MASSIVE movie dayy.
2: This is the end of the "Skywalker Saga", meaning a lot of people will come out to just see it to the end AND it is the end of their most heavily nsotalgia baity saga. Anything from here is brand new.


I'd propose that means that, given the perfect storm of -positive- factors, that this is the roof of what they can now hit. And that STILL is an under performance.

 

[Clark Kent]

Looks like Justice League all over again. Prepare for endless whining for "the Abrahms/Lucas/Filoni cut" or some equivalent of the mythical Snyder cut (which doesn't exist because Whedon literally rewrote much of the original script which was never filmed, such as Darkseid resurrecting Superman which is why he woke up acting like a cunt, FYI ).

Also, Disney *will* cook the books. It will cost them less to do so than the prospective stock price hit, and we'll see all sorts of mainstream articles pushing the film as a success with all sorts of qualifiers ("2nd highest grossing holiday Wednesday sequel opening in an odd-numbered year").

 

[Miller]

Lando turned into a loner hermit like Luke did.

It's sad that they cut any chance of character development. Allegedly in one of the versions of the movie he was the father of that girl stormtrooper who got kidnapped by the FO, then he (of course) abandoned the search, now "akchually he's just a guy who had everything but one day decided to live with the space bedouins because why not? lol" and the story ends with him talking to the girl like if he wanted to bang her.

 

[Ihavetinyweewee]

I hope Mulan returns. Why else would you have that figure standing over her body like that? She ain't dead.

Part of me still hopes we will get the Holiday Special but like Song of the South it shall remain under lock and key...fighting the frizzies at 11.

Well, it was nighttime in the desert. It gets pretty cold. He could have ripped open her blaster wound and crawled inside. That happens in Star Wars..

The figure was Moff Gideon.

The only acceptable way to bring her back: is to show what Moff Gideon would do to the child if it is his custody.

Something horrific, where she is like Frankenstein monster thing. Drooling and shitting herself would make it better...

It would, at least, give her worthless character a makeover...

As it stands, all the villans in episode 7 completely outshine her. She has no gimmik. Infact, she is the laziest creation on show by a mile...

You seem to be the only one wanting her back...

You can kiss my ass, I'm not sitting through AN HOUR of Jenny talking. You guys trying to kill me?

I'm midly curious what her list of "complaints" were. If someone wants to sum up, I would appreciate it...

I'm guessing not enough Rose Tico is one of them...

 

[Jaimas]

I never understood why Matt cucked for Disney, especially when he got a large part of his audience by criticizing 2016 Ghostbusters for having the exact same flaws that SW currently has. It's almost like Candid where he's shilling for cash, but we all know that Rat doesn't care enough to pay Matt a penny. So he's literally just being a contrarian for whatever bit of attention he can get.

It's very quite simple: Matt hates nerddom for seeing through his shit, so he takes great enjoyment in doing anything he can to hurt it in turn.

He duplicated other people's video formats and changed himself repeatedly to try to sieze an audience without emulating what made other channels successful, and people saw through it. He briefly saw a buff with GG after ZQ DMCA'd his video, but wound up immediately exhausting all goodwill and people saw what he was basically immediately. He's the asshole who whined about Social Justice tards using the tactics they do before doing something infinitely more egregious.

He's like Devi Ever minus the scam artistry and troonism.

 

[Reverend]

Here's Grace to deliver the bad news to the Fandom Menace that TROS is tracking only 6 million behind TLJ and it's looking good for a billion worldwide.

Edit: LOL, I re-added the video timestamped (hopefully at 2:33) when even Grace is taking the piss out of the sad sacks that hatewatched the movie or went knowing it would be shit.

No one has EVER disagreed on the Farms that TROS wouldn't track to $1B globally. We would be shocked and surprised that it MAY make less than $1B.

Anyone that believed contrary is waterheaded exceptional mongoloid.

Box Office Mojo lists a worldwide gross as $704 million. Which would make it a bomb. I assume for this thing to break even it would have had to have made 1.2 billion in the first 2 weeks.

We still haven't accounted for DVD/Blu Ray sales yet, I know that'll be tens of millions, but that's what Disney will attempt to sell to shareholders;

 

[Shroom King]

I've mentioned before that one of the few redeeming bits of Solo for me was that it finally put WEG's criminally under-utilized Imperial Army onscreen.

Love those guys.

I agree with this. Even in the mid-80's I learned that Stormtroopers were supposed to be elite soldiers, yet they got manhandled through the entire OT: they are easily fooled in ANH, they are too dumb to speak in ESB and they get routed by Ewoks in ROTJ. Then all the content in the 90's and beyond had to make Bigger, Faster, Stronger Stormtroopers, because regular Stormtroopers were just that, regular. You had darktroopers, deathtroopers, arctroopers and so on.

 

[Ridleys Mouth Filter]

I dunno this was mentioned recently or what but I do like that if nothing else comes of this shitshow rotten tomatoes has been totally proven to take the house of mouses money. Today they are shilling the fuck outta how successful this crap was over the extended weekend. Can’t cap it atm but after we noticed it wasn’t moving percentages to accurately reflect reality they start sucking rat balls hard. Now it’s their front page “omg this movie yay!” Bullshit. Personally I suppose I would say the same if they took a truckload or cash and dropped it on my lawn, but in the interest of integrity I’d insist on a copy of the casting couch video from daisys interview so we could at least laugh at the cgi laden “plank gets nailed” nucanon behinf the scene so

 

[Duke Nukem]

He is married (further confirmation that anyone can find someone) but I think being an incel is a state of mind and he clearly fits the criteria. You can be a virgin and not be an incel whilest you can be "married" and be an incel.

That's not an incel, that's being a cuckold. If this abomination can get a "wife" then I'm pretty sure he's not involved anywhere in her busy sex life. But trying to define what an incel actually is, is like trying to lasso smoke.

 

[Akumaten]

Jeb’s A mixed bag in that she’ll have some pretty good takes but also some not so good ones

On a kind of related note I was browsing Mauler’s subreddit and I saw a post claiming that Kathleen Kennedy was one of the producers of the last Airbender

Evidence:

Kathleen Kennedy

Kathleen Kennedy is a five-time Academy Award-nominated American movie industry executive. She has worked as producer on many films, especially with Steven Spielberg and her husband Frank Marshall. She is well known for producing the Jurassic Park films and E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial. As of...

avatar.fandom.com

And it gets better you know how people got mad at Shymalan for race bending: it was not his choice. Cray Cray KK was the one behind the casting decisions because she wanted it to be marketable. Oh vey that is very problematic big YIKES. It would be a real shame of this knowledge became more well known to the masses.

A little off topic, but with this revelation, the feminist concept of The Legend of Korra makes sense now.

 

[supermonkeylove]

That's right, Ricardo!

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Here’s Bob Chipman screaming at TJ Kirk for arguing the What If Trilogy had no plan at all.

 

[Poe-Shen Zcela]

Rewatching Mando S1. I've lightened up a bit on Episode 4. I still consider it filler and the low point of the season, and I still don't believe Cara Dune dropping Dyn like that, but otherwise it's a cute episode. I didn't realize they spent more than a couple days on Planet Sorghum before leaving. The antagonists are just Uruk-hai from LOTR.

Best part of Episode 5 was Mulan getting shot in the gut. Nice fakeout. Pretty serviceable episode, though there wasn't much reason to go to Tatooine other than invoking membaberries and showing how much it had changed since ROTJ/ANH.

Also finished rewatching the Prequels. Episode II could've been so much better if Anakin didn't sound like he was trying to quote Shakespeare. I'm not convinced that Anakin had nobody to talk to other than Obi-Wan. No other fellow Padawans? Friends, rivals? Anyways, I still dug the action set pieces, CG and all. I can appreciate Lucas wanting to flex his digital film workshop, and wanting to insert elements of his earlier movies into Coruscant. Race cars and 50's diners, sure. It's a big city-world. Kamino is the coolest part of the movie, though it does rely on an unsolved mystery in Master Syfo Dias' commissioning of the clone army. I don't have a huge problem with this, but it does confuse Dooku's role. On the one hand you have Jango claiming he was hired by Lord Tyranus to serve as the template for a clone army. But later, when he's conferring with Nute Gunray and the Geonosian leader, he acts surprised that the Republic could amass such a large army. Was he playing dumb, or did he really not expect it?

Episode III I don't have any issues with. It's pretty much kino, but there are definitely questionable parts. Killing younglings and Palpatine practically admitting he lied to Anakin about knowing how to cheat death stick out in particular, but both can be argued away as part of Anakin's seduction by the Dark Lord. In the end it's still an effective tragedy with the best, most technical lightsaber fight ever filmed.

TL;DR Leia was casually bigoted towards Wookiees, Corellians and short people.

I know you're memeing, but Leia was just busting their balls for not having an escape plan.

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MFW I remember his actual name is butts.

I'm being redundant, but the Prequels are pure kino. Warts and all.

 

[Reverend]

Here’s Bob Chipman screaming at TJ Kirk for arguing the What If Trilogy had no plan at all.
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Fuck Bob Chipdick. Lucas had a VISION of what he wanted and made it happen. Was it perfect? No. WAs it awful, in some parts dreadful. But thematically the story was told with a beginning, middle, and end with a unified plot much like OT was.

If that's not light years beyond telling 3?5?7? director's to "Go make The Star Wars Movies, I'll be in my office collecting a check" by KrayKray I don't know what is.

 

[Poe-Shen Zcela]

Disney Suffered $2.22 Billion Loss From Its Lucasfilm Purchase?

The Practical Economics blog has recently posted an article about Disney’s finances with regards to the Star Wars franchise. He starts off the piece with noting some notables: One of the Pro…

disneystarwarsisdumb.wordpress.com

I've always been led to believe that Disney never made their investment back on the Lucasfilm purchase. Now I have a number.

 

[damian]

God Bless JJ

https://archive.ph/WK46E